setbacks ...they are a natural thing that happens when we decide to grow and let go..

it is okay to reach a plateau and to feel like not progressing at all. It is part of the game.

you have a choice then. beating yourself up and feeling shame and guilt or taking a break and knowing that even the strongest in your field feel that way at times..

be gentle on yourself today

with warmth 

aurora

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#wellbeing

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#beyoufearlessly 

hey there and welcome to the borealis experience i'

your host Aurora and yeah i' very happy to be spending som

time with you today i kno that's my intro but these days

really feel like i need tha time out from farm life and si

here record an episode for yo and it will give me peace and

know i can give you peace too s it really helps me to to creat

that space of peace and quie and reflection plus i'm on m

period right now and i feel lik a piece of roadkill so it's goo

to take a break from yea running around taking care o

chickens fixing stuff and so o today i want to talk abou

setbacks and yeah how do yo feel when you have been workin

on a project have the intentio to give up an addictio

for

sorry i'm distracted now because the dogs entered the room or a

habit that you want to let go of how do you feel in those days

where you have that urge that craving to go back to that habit

to that addiction or when you're working on a project and you

feel you're not advancing you're stuck here reaching a plateau

yeah how do you feel in those times a lot of us feel shame and

guilt and feel depressed like short term depression you feel

as if you're a failure as if you really can't let go of that

behavior that habit and i think if we know that it is normal to

feel that way that progress growing is not linear it's not

ongoing every day every second on your life in your life that

growth is sometimes having to go back having to stop having to

relax into what is hey there and welcome to the borealis

experience i'm your host aurora excuse moi that was my puppies

in the background starting to wrestle and yeah so if you take

dozer for example my three year old puppy we are potty training

him and he's been doing awesome like really good and today is a

day where it's not working at all like he doesn't even say

when he wants to go out and there's absolutely no point in

punishing him and making them feel bad we just put him out

doors and emphasize again that being outdoors is what is

supposed to happen and yeah compassion and patience patience

patience big times and i feel with another human with an

animal it is so easy to do but when it comes to ourselves we're

always the harshest biggest assholes and so judgmental is so

critical and go right into guilt and shame and that makes it even

worse like if you look at people who want to get away from

alcohol and those days where they have that urge that craving

and then maybe go back to a little bit of alcohol and then

they think about oh my god i'm going back to my addiction now

and try to drink that down and try to numb that feeling out

because it's not good to feel as if you're failing in overcoming

your addiction but you're doing that very thing to numb that

shitty feeling again so how can we not punish ourselves beat

ourselves up so much when we have these thoughts when we have

these cravings, because it all begins with a thought it all

begins with a feeling, right? You want to be good you want to

be without your addiction. But you have that feeling that comes

up that need to numb things out or to forget or to make things

easier with your with your substance of choice. So when you

meditate, or when you allow yourself to reflect about your

thoughts, then you can catch yourself right away and then do

the opposite. Like growing sometimes means to do the exact

opposite that what you feel like doing right now. So if you feel

like drinking again, smoking again, then go for a run

instead, or call a friend and tell her tell him about your

thoughts. And don't give in and don't beat yourself up, be like

your best friend and create a space where you can forgive

yourself where you can be okay with these thoughts and

feelings, and they will pass they will go away.

It is just very important to be kind to yourself. As I said at

the beginning, progress growth is not linear. And also means

that you will be confronted with situations that come

unexpectedly and that will challenge you that will test you

it will be tests that come and you will always have a choice,

you will always know that you can stop and take a breath and

make a wise decision, a decision that is best for you a decision

that couple of years back he wouldn't have been able to do.

So I think it is extremely important to say that at this

point. That if you are in it for growth, if you are about to give

up an addiction or behavior, and you're listening to my podcast,

there will be days where you feel like an absolute failure

where you feel you're not progressing. But nothing is

happening. I thought I still there, my insomnia is still

there. And I still want to go back to my ex because that's

easiest. those thoughts are just thoughts. And those urges are

just urges, but we can learn to observe them and resist them and

take the volume down like from a radio station. And then you'll

be good, then you'll be fine with where you're at and know

that tomorrow is going to be different tomorrow, you might

feel like you're growing again and you're walking into the

right direction. It's okay to sometimes stop and feel lost and

feel like a complete failure. Like when you look at Joe Rogan,

when you look at Whitney Cummings, or whoever you're

following whoever you think is doing awesome out there. They

all have these days of self doubt of self criticism and of

feeling like a failure because you always compare yourself to

things that you think you don't have in life, right? So also

successful. Sorry, successful people feel like a failure at

times. But what they learn to do is not punish themselves and be

okay with that for a moment. And then continue and not let that

little setback make you throw away your whole your whole

progress that you've made in the past weeks or months or years.

So it is a conscious decision that you have to make in those

times. And I know you can do it because you wouldn't be here and

listening to me. If you were not capable. I believe in you so

much. You have to believe in you. And be kind to yourself.

Yes, that was it for today. You're listening to the Borealis

experience. I'm your host Aurora and I'll be out there tomorrow.

Again. I'm so grateful that I can be raw and transparent and

genuine with you. I don't have to put On the show, I don't have

to be my best to every day I can be low energy and still doing

good out there. So I'm very grateful that you value that and

that I can serve you the best way I can in a very authentic

way. Great

until next