We finish up our series on goals this week by talking about one of the key outside ingredients for success: Allies. Allies are the people we surround ourselves with. We do have a choice of who our friends are and who we spend our time with. This is a key ingredient in how you succeed as a man. Pick the right friends and you are more likely to grow and meet your goals. Pick the wrong friends and you can get pulled back or even brought down to never even try to reach your goals.

We dive into what makes someone an ally and how to find the right kinds of allies. Then we talk about some practical ways to connect with potential allies.

What is an Ally?

• Ally - “To unite or connect in a personal relationship, as in friendship or marriage.”
• Tribe is a common term used and it can mean the same thing
• However, we have to be careful because a friendship group that you call a tribe can be allies for you or they may be the opposite.

How to Recognize an Ally:

Allies Don’t Sabotage Your Life

• Men who are your allies push you to be better-they don’t push you to be stupid
• The problem is so many men are lonely today, they often get into a tribe that doesn’t help them be better as men
• If you are part of a group that after you spend time with them you are often filled with regret (or you can’t remember what you did) those guys aren’t allies

Allies Build You Up

• Real allies are men who will care about you where you are at in life, but push you and challenge you to be better.
• They don’t take themselves or you too seriously, they are relaxed around you and you feel relaxed around them
• These are the type of guys you can argue with about the greatest truck, video game, or sports team around today for an hour, but you can also go deep about what is happening in your family right now
• Men were created for these types of friendships
• Our friendships should not just be about us, but our friends should encourage us to be better men and not basic men.

Where Do I Find Allies?

• Finding allies isn’t something that happens by accident
• Men who are potential allies are often guys you share values and interests with
• The place you will never find a true ally is sitting at home alone

CHALLENGE:

How Do I Recruit Allies?

• Finding a group of men to be allies can happen but it takes some intentional effort
• Get out and around other men
• Be the instigator of relationships
• Get curious about others and their lives
• Seek to spend more time with those you feel a natural connection with
• Create goals/resolutions together