My corporate job is going through some changes and as I am meeting with different departments I am seeing across the board how people are handling the change. Some are embracing the change while others are resisting it.

In today's episode I dive into how I've handled change in the past, how I think my parents handled a large change in our family's life, and how I am choosing to embrace change moving forward.

As in all seasons, change is a constant, what we do with it truly leads to the way our future turns out.

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Intro: Welcome to the Love Always, Jess podcast. I’m your host, Jess, and my mission is to give you the tools to step outside of your comfort zone and into your empowered self. Here, I encourage you to let go of shame and societal pressures and reimagine your future the way you want it. All of this is done through a lens of love. Love for self and love for others. When we show up in our best light, feeling confident, living vulnerably, and existing in our truth we give permission to others to do the exact same. If you’re ready to show up emboldened in your life, join me as we dive into hard topics, find joy in the small things, and love always.

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Hello, I hope you are doing well. This week I want to talk about the inevitable thing that happens to us all in pretty much every situation in life, and that is change. We are going through a massive change in our departments at work. One of things that has become apparent to me is how well certain people are taking the change, and how well other people are not.

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I have personally been resistant to change at certain points in my life. I think one of the biggest things that creates that resistance is the unknown and I can understand how when it comes to corporate changes there’s always that fear of ‘is this the end of my job? Does this mean that my job will be eliminated?’ Which then leads to the fear of losing out on your income and that trickles down into losing your home, not being able to afford food, having to find another job, and updating your resume. There’s that whole spiral. When it comes to the changes that are happening at work, I’m not fearful. I’ve been through corporate changes before. While scary, this one feels as if it’s for the betterment of our departments, so I look forward to seeing what ends up happening.

As part of my job, I am trying to simplify and make more compliant different areas. Some of those changes that I am making are coming up against some resistance, which I understand, and I’m trying to be patient. I’m trying to have some empathy towards certain peoples’ resistance because I understand that that fear is there.

Taking this into normal day to day life – things are going to change in our lives and I mentioned earlier that I used to resist change. To some extent, I probably still do resist change, but over the years I’ve learned that this is something I can’t control. I like to control situations. I am very much a type A personality who likes to be in control. I have a tendency to thrive when things are controlled variables. I also have spent many years working on that. Working on going with the flow. Working on just letting things be and letting the pieces fall where they need to fall. It is not always easy, I still struggle. Initially I will get frustrated and I will have my moment of venting, my moment of crying. I am a crier when I get stressed out. But I will have my moment. I will stress, and freakout, and cry, and vent, and let all shit hit the fan, but then once I’ve done that, I’m pretty even keeled. I’m pretty, ‘okay this is what’s going to happen now.’

At the end of the day, nothing ever really works out exactly one hundred percent the way that you want it to. Things will work out. You’ll get the house, you’ll get the job, you’ll get the vacation, you’ll get whatever it is that you want, but it may not look one hundred percent like you pictured and that’s okay. I think we can all agree that change is scary. I think part of the reason that is scary is because of that unknown factor. We can’t see what’s coming around the corner. We don’t fully know how this shift in scenery, in situation, this shift in whatever is going to work out. Waking up to start your day when things are changing leaves you with some uncertainty. It leaves you unsure of what the next step to take is. We were told about this change about a month ago and things are still falling into place. My boss put it really well for me. I was constantly asking her, “do we change this? Do we do this now? Do we do that?” and she said, “keep it as status quo until you’ve been told to make the change.” Because things are constantly moving, we don’t know where the pieces are going to settle right now.

And it’s similar in life where we might have a small change, or we might have a big change, and sometimes those big changes take a little bit longer for pieces to fall into place. Maybe your partner said, “hey, I got a job offer in another state, do I take it?” and you guys agreed to take the job. So you’re flying to the other state. You’re driving to the other state. You’re packing up your boxes. You’re trying to find a house. You’re trying to figure out how the school system is going to work for your children. You’re going to have to make new friends. You’re going to have to find a new job yourself. You are moving into a new neighborhood that you have no idea what the neighbors are like, what the community is like. There are so many variables that are still to be determined based off of that one change, and that can be daunting.

I can’t imagine what it was like for my parents to uproot and move away from Minnesota in the early 2000s. I knew that me personally, that I was leaving behind friends and that I would be going to a new school, but I didn’t have anything else to figure out because I was just a child. My parents had to figure out my dad commuting until we moved, back and forth from Minnesota to California, and what that meant for the home life in Minnesota. My parents had to juggle finding a house. They had to figure out putting me and my siblings into a new school. They had to figure out what daily commutes were going to look like, and who was going to pick up the kids after school, and who was going to do what. My mom had to get a new job. So there were a lot of pieces that were still to be determined, but my parents faced it with a brave front. Honestly, now that I’m talking about this I kind of want to ask my dad how that times was. My parents were ready for the move. My mom had told my dad five years prior, “you have five years to move me to California,” and it so happened to work out. With that simple nudge, their lives started to change. They were on a path to make a difference happen in their lives; in all of our lives. It would be stupid of me to assume that they weren’t scared because I’m sure there was some fear there. And just like every single change we face, we face it with some fear, but I’m sure my parents – despite being afraid, or nervous, or weary of the unknown – I’m sure, more than anything, there was excitement.

The changes happening at work, I’m excited for. I’m excited to see what happens. I’m excited to see the opportunities open as things continue to grow and adjust, and as the pieces fall into place. The changes that are going to be coming in my life in the coming years I’m excited for. I have learned all those years I spent trying to control, trying to make sure that whatever changes come I was ready for, that I had a plan in place, that I could ensure my safety. I’ve realized that the energy that was spent in those more negative feelings could be transitioned into a more positive feeling of excitement, of growth, of gaining knowledge, or adventure, of figuring out who I am in this new season. We don’t ask for change. We don’t, as humans, biologically we don’t put ourselves in a set up for things to intentionally happen to us. That’s not the way we are wired, but they do, and some of those changes are welcomed. The change of getting married, the change of having a child, the change of starting over a new job that you may have been wanting a change because life wasn’t working out at your old job. Even the changes we know that we need to make happen, those can be daunting, but I urge you to change your framework. I encourage you to look towards the positive outlooks of that change. Some changes are going to be harder than others. My mom dying was a massive change. I can’t saying anything positive resulted from her dying, other than the fact that I have grown as a human.

Even in the hardest of times your life is going to shine, you just have to ask yourself the question of, ‘am I going to focus on the light or am I going to focus on the dark? Are you going to take the opportunity that is standing in front of you to step into the human being that you’re being called to become?’ Ultimately, that’s what change is. Change is asking you to grow and to become the next iteration of yourself that you are meant to become in this life. Without change we don’t grow, and without growth we don’t see humanity becoming the greatest that it can be in this life. We don’t need to go down that path, but change is inevitable. It just is, and I’ve learned that I’d much rather embrace the positive, the exciting moments that come with change, versus sitting and wondering what if?

One of the biggest reframes that has stuck with me, and I’ve shared on the last episode, is the reframe of ‘what if it doesn’t work out?’ to ‘what if it does work out?’ What if it is meant to be? What if it does change your life for the better? What if [insert any positive outcome at the end of that]? I would much rather have that outlook versus the opposite because it’s less scary. But the second thing, which I feel is the most important, is it prepares your body and your nervous system to move through the change much easier. I’d rather move through the change with as much ease as possible instead of facing that resistance. When I resist it, it hurts me more, but if I say, ‘you know what? This is good. What if this is better for me? What if this is something that takes me to the next level?’

Just yesterday I watched the World Cup with my dad and I was sitting there, and I’ve been having this idea in my brain forever, and I was all of a sudden off the couch, driving to staples. Grabbing a binder, pocket folders, papers, pens, and I came home and I just wrote. I took the ideas in my head and in my phone and I put it on paper. I solidified it. I inked it into fruition. Instead of being afraid of the change, I took action and I wrote it down and I solidified it. I chose what it was that I was going to do. I took the step. I don’t know what the next step is going to be yet. I have ideas floating in my head, but the first step is that. This is going to be a long change process, but I’m excited for it. I chose to no longer resist it. I chose to move forward. I chose to embrace it. Next, I move on to the next stage in the change process. I could think about what’s going to happen five, ten years from now. How life is going to look, and that’s scary and terrifying, but I chose to focus on the small piece, the piece that excited me, and grow in that for now.

I encourage you to try to do the same. To try and embrace change. I hear you and your concerns. I have been there. I have felt it. Change is scary. Change brings up a lot of emotions we didn’t know we had, but on the flip side it is also exciting. It also means that something great is out there for you. You might not see the outcome yet, but it’s coming. So look forward to it, embrace it, and feed it in the positive light. I love you all, bye.

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Outro: Thank you for listening. I hope this episode left you feeling more confident in the future you are creating. I would love to hear your thoughts on the podcast so please leave a review, and remember sharing is caring. If you know somebody who could benefit from this podcast on their own personal journey, please share it with them. What I know we need more of in this world are people who are thriving and living their own personal truths. I hope you will join me in making this world a better and brighter place by living a life filled with love always. And to you, dear listener, much love, always. Bye!

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Disclaimer: All audio and recordings on the Love Always, Jess podcast are owned, produced, and recorded by Jessica Trapp, owner of Love Always, Jess. AI was not used in the production of the recordings, art work, transcripts, or any other content associated with this podcast. All topics discussed are the opinions of Jess and are not professional advice.