Being the person everyone counts on can feel rewarding. But when every question, problem, and decision keeps coming back to you, your dependability can start limiting your success.

In episode #1209, George and Mary-Lynn explore why capable people often become indispensable—and why breaking that pattern can create more freedom for everyone involved. You’ll discover how to stop rescuing and start developing others, why delegating outcomes works better than simply handing off tasks, and how a simple Go-To Audit can reveal where your time is really going.

BIGG Takeaways:

• It's crucial to shift from being indispensable to enabling others to solve their own problems.
• Delegating outcomes rather than tasks fosters growth in those around you and promotes independence.
• Recognizing the difference between being valuable and being necessary can transform your approach to helping others.
• The path to true success involves creating capacity in yourself and others, not just solving immediate issues.

Links referenced in this episode:

• 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
• Life Map Course
• BIGG Success Newsletter

On this episode of the BIGG Success Show, stop being the Go-to Person.

BIGG Success with The Professor and Mary-Lynn.

There's this old saying: "If you need something done, ask a busy person to do it." Now, if you are that go-to person, you may feel flattered.

That may feel like success in the short run because everyone's coming to you for everything.

Yeah, your inbox fills up. Your schedule gets packed. People wait for you to answer before they move forward.

Meanwhile, the things you really need to accomplish keep getting pushed aside.

That's when being the go-to person stops feeling like an accomplishment and over time becomes something that holds you back. And that's the trap of being the go-to person.

Welcome to the BIGG Success Show where we help you create the life you want. Hi, I'm Mary-Lynn.

And I'm George, The Professor.

Here's the strange thing about being the go-to person. You probably got there for all the right reasons. You're capable, you're dependable, helpful. You care about doing things well.

But sometimes the behavior that helps you become successful can eventually limit your success. That's what can happen when being dependable turns into being indispensable.

So today's discussion isn't about becoming less helpful. It's about becoming helpful in a better way. It's making the shift from, "Everybody needs me." To, "I'm only helping the people who really need me."

That's especially important for personal entrepreneurship. Entrepreneurs understand that time, energy, money, relationships, and talents are all limited resources.

In this episode, we're going to explore: Why it's so hard to stop being the go to person; Why you should stop rescuing and start developing; And how to delegate outcomes instead of tasks.

So if being the go-to person can eventually hold you back, as we've already established, why is it so hard to stop?

Because being needed comes with some pretty powerful rewards. There's recognition,

people appreciate me,

Identity.

I'm the person who gets things done.

Control.

If I do it myself. Oh boy, I hear myself in this one. If I do it myself, I know it'll be done right.

And there can even be a sense of security.

If everybody needs me, I must be valuable.

Those are powerful incentives. And there's another reason the pattern is so hard to break. Being the go to person. Hey, it usually works!

Yeah.

Someone has a problem, they come to you, you solve it. Problem gone.

Poof!

It feels efficient, it feels productive. And it reinforces the idea that coming to you was the right thing to do. So the next time there's a problem, what happens?

They come to you again...Problem. You. Solution.

Without realizing it, you're training people to rely on you. That's important to understand. You're training people to rely on you, and you're training yourself to keep stepping in.

And that's where we have to make an important distinction. Being valuable is not the same as being necessary for everything. In fact, one of the ways we grow is by changing how we create value.

Early on, your value may come largely from what you can do.

But as you grow as a leader, business owner, manager, parent, or even in personal development, more of your value can come from what you help other people become capable of doing.

That's a very different way to think about success. Your goal isn't to become less helpful or less dependable. It's to stop measuring your value by how much everyone needs you.

Because sometimes the next level of your success requires something that can feel surprisingly uncomfortable. Being needed less.

Ooh, that is uncomfortable. But as we all know, growth requires the willingness to be uncomfortable. And with that growth, we can stop rescuing and start developing.

Why is that something you should do, Professor?

Well, Mary-Lynn, it's because there's another side to being this go-to person, that we don't always think about. Every time you step in to help someone, you may solve an immediate problem. But are you also helping that person become more capable?

Helping gives people the support they need to move forward. Rescuing takes over something they could learn to handle themselves.

And rescuing can feel like the right thing to do. You have the experience, they don't. You have the answer - you can probably do it faster, so why not just take care of it?

Because sometimes efficiency today comes at the expense of capability tomorrow.

When you continually step in, the other person misses the opportunity to think through the problem, make a decision, learn from the result, and build confidence.

So instead of immediately providing the answer, become the question person. When someone comes to you to ask for help, say, "Well, what do you think we should do?" Or, "What options have you considered?"

Or our favorite, "If I weren't available, how would you handle this?" Then comes the real key part. Resist the urge to jump in because it's going to be there.

And then give them the chance to think and work out the answer.

Because now you're doing more than solving today's problem. You're developing tomorrow's problem solver.

Ooh, that's a BIGG insight right there.

And yes, that can take more time up front. Teaching someone may take longer than doing it yourself.

Coaching them through a decision may take longer than simply making it, and they may not do it exactly the way you would. Mary-Lynn, I remember being a young manager and this is exactly what I thought was, "It doesn't have to be my way as long as it gets the job done."

That's a BIGG insight right there too!

Yeah. And I mean, that's the investment that you're making to get this problem solver on board.

And there's another benefit - confidence grows through experience. People become more confident making decisions by...making decisions. And they become better problem solvers by...solving problems.

You can't develop these muscles for them.

So when someone comes to you for help, don't just ask, "How can I solve this?" Ask, "How can I use this moment to help them grow?" That's the shift from rescuing to developing. And over time, you're doing something even bigger.

You're creating capacity not just in yourself, but in the people around you.

Now let's talk about how to delegate outcomes instead of tasks, because this is another way to stop being the go to person. The key is to not just delegate tasks, delegate outcomes.

And there is a BIGG difference.

Oh, that's BIGG with two Gs,

You better believe it. When you delegate a task, you tell someone exactly what to do and how often to do it.

They may complete the work, but you're still doing much of the thinking. When you delegate an outcome, you make the desired result clear and give the other person appropriate freedom to figure out how to achieve it.

Stephen Covey illustrates this beautifully with his famous "Green and Clean" story from the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, one of The Professor's favorite books.

That's for sure, I've read it many times.

Covey wanted his young son to take responsibility for the family lawn. And he could have given him a long list of instructions: Mow on this day, water at this time, pick up the trash this way.

But instead he focused on the outcome. The yard needed to be green and clean. Green meant the grass should look healthy. Clean meant the yard should be free of trash and clutter.

These two simple words gave his son a clear picture of success. Then Covey established the boundaries and resources his son could create. His his son could decide how and when to do the work.

He could use the family's tools and he could ask his father for help. But his son owned the outcome, and.

That's the important distinction. Covey wasn't simply transferring lawn work, he was transferring responsibility for the result. That meant that his son had to make decisions.

He had to notice when something needed attention. He had to figure out what to do next. He wasn't just following dad's instructions, he was. He was learning to take ownership.

Now, this is where delegation often breaks down. We tell someone they're responsible for something and then we keep telling them exactly how we want them to do it.

And that's not ownership, that's following instructions.

Personal delegation sounds more like this: "Here's what success looks like. Here's why it matters. Here are the boundaries. Here are the resources available to you. Here's when we need to check in.

Now, how would you like to approach it?"

That requires something from you, too. You have to accept that someone else may not do it exactly the way that you would.

Ooh, that can be really tough to accept.

It is tough to accept.

Yep.

But if the outcome is right and they're operating within the agreed upon boundaries, different doesn't necessarily mean wrong. That's a hard lesson for a lot of go to people.

Yes, I'm shaking my head. So before you hand off your next responsibility, identify its version of green and clean. Ask yourself, what does a successful outcome look like?

Why does it matter?

What are the boundaries?

What can this person decide without me?

When do I actually need to be involved? And then give them room to own it.

Because the goal isn't just to get something off your plate. It's to give someone real ownership so every decision doesn't keep coming back to you.

And that gives you more freedom to focus on the things that truly require you. Your strategic priorities, your health, your family, a new opportunity, thinking time, or simply some breathing room.

[exhale] So good! Because freedom isn't having nothing to do. It's having greater control over what you do with your finite time. Which is a BIGG insight right there.

And now we're ready for this episode's BIGG Assignment from The Professor.

This week conduct a Go-To Audit for seven days. Keep a simple list of the questions, problems, decisions, approvals, and tasks that may automatically come to you at the end of the week.

Put each one into one of three buckets: Only me.

That means it genuinely requires your knowledge, authority, relationship, or unique ability.

Teach.

Someone else could handle it if you invested a little time helping them learn.

And systemize.

A checklist template, process automation, FAQ or standing rule can handle it.

Then choose one item from teach or systemize just one.

Teach someone or create the checklist, or write the instructions, or set the rule, or build the template, or whatever makes sense.

Then, and this is important, don't take it back the first time it isn't done exactly the way you would have done it. Coach, clarify, improve, but give the person or process a chance to work. Then next week, do it again.

Because you're not just getting tasks off your plate, you're creating capacity.

Now for this episode's BIGG Takeaway. Being the person everyone can count on is a strength.

Being the person everyone has to count on is a problem. BIGG success isn't about making yourself indispensable to every task, decision, and problem.

It's about creating enough capacity that you have the freedom to focus and your precious time on what matters most. That leads to BIGG success.

If you're struggling to decide what does deserve your time, that's one of the things our Life Map Course helps you clarify.

Your Life Map brings your personal, professional and financial goals together so you can focus more of your time and energy on creating the life you really want. Learn more at LifeMapCourse.com. Want more practical ideas for doing just that?

Join our newsletter at BIGGsuccess.com/Join and get BIGG success delivered right to your inbox. And come say hello on social media. You'll find us on all channels @BIGGsuccess. And of course, that's BIGG with 2Gs.

We'd love to hear what you're working on. And on our next episode: Success builds confidence. But could it also make us a little more afraid to start over? That's next time on BIGG Success.

Follow the BIGG Success Show wherever you listen to podcasts so you don't miss it.

And we thank you so much for listening. Until next time...

Here's to your BIGG success!

Find BIGG Success at BIGGsuccess.com