Most women have a hard time trusting their own truth - which is why they stay in jobs, relationships and friendships way past their expiry date. It might seem easy to follow the heart until it entails a big risk, going against the grain and walking away from what is perceived as “safe" but is a trap. 

In this week’s solo episode, Kate dives into what it actually means to trust your heart — especially when fear, doubt, and your overthinking brain are trying to take the wheel.

Tune in to learn

• How to tell the difference between your intuition and your fear
• Why your heart’s truth rarely makes sense (and why that’s the best news ever)
• What happens when you stop outsourcing your guidance and start following your inner truth
• The 3 keys to support you to live from your heart 

If you’ve been standing at a crossroads, second-guessing what’s true for you… This episode is your permission slip to let your heart lead. 

Resources & Next Steps:

FREE Discover Your Saboteur Mini Course: https://www.theunscriptdwoman.com/discover-your-saboteur

Subscribe to The New Truth & leave a review if this episode resonates deeply

Explore The Immersion with Kate: https://www.theunscriptdwoman.com/the-immersion

To book a Free Call to explore working with Kate - click the link below: https://calendly.com/expanded-love/exploration-call-clone

About the Host:

Kate Harlow is the founder of The Unscriptd Woman, the creator of The Expanded Love Coaching Method, and host of The New Truth podcast - ranked in the top 1.5% globally. With over 15 years of experience teaching, coaching and facilitating transformational retreats worldwide, Kate has helped hundreds of thousands of women break free from outdated relational patterns, old patriarchal ways of thinking and unspoken rules to live by. 

Her infallible methods guide women to release the deeply ingrained scripts that keep them stuck- empowering women to step into their highest, most magnetic, and fully expressed selves. Through her coaching, retreats, podcast and upcoming book The Unscriptd Woman, Kate is redefining what it means to be an empowered woman in today's world, showing women how to stop waiting for permission and start creating a life and love that aligns with their deepest truth. 

Known for her rare ability to see exactly where women are out of alignment with themselves, Kate offers a path back to unwavering self- trust, meaningful joy and true fulfillment. Her work is a revolution - one that liberates women from societal expectations and invites them into a life of radical authenticity, thriving relationships and unshakable self-worth.  

Website:  https://www.theunscriptdwoman.com/

The Immersion in Corfu, Greece April 26- May 3, 2026 https://www.theunscriptdwoman.com/the-immersion

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Kate Harlow: 00:00:00

Have heart clarity, and then you go tell your

Kate Harlow: 00:00:03

friends, hey, I'm trying to figure this out. What do you

Kate Harlow: 00:00:06

think you're most likely going to have people convince you to

Kate Harlow: 00:00:09

go against your heart? Sometimes it illuminates what your truth

Kate Harlow: 00:00:12

is like. If someone says, No, you shouldn't go to Kenya, it's

Kate Harlow: 00:00:15

going to and you really want to, you're going to have a stronger

Kate Harlow: 00:00:18

feeling. That's a possibility. But also, if other people are

Kate Harlow: 00:00:22

feeding your fear, your fear is only going to get louder, which

Kate Harlow: 00:00:25

is why you don't want to outsource those conversations.

Kate Harlow: 00:00:27

If you're starting to have a feeling like, Hmm, maybe my

Kate Harlow: 00:00:30

relationship is out of alignment. I'm like, something's

Kate Harlow: 00:00:33

quite something's feeling off. I'm feeling this, like, desire

Kate Harlow: 00:00:37

for a new beginning. I'm feeling this desire for letting go, make

Kate Harlow: 00:00:41

space for that, write about it like sit in meditation and

Kate Harlow: 00:00:44

actually just connect to your heart and don't have external

Kate Harlow: 00:00:48

conversations about it.

Kate Harlow: 00:00:50

Hello, my loves. Kate Harlow, here, how are you doing? How is

Kate Harlow: 00:00:56

your heart today, I'm so happy to be here tuning in to talk all

Kate Harlow: 00:01:00

about how to trust your heart, how to live from the frequency

Kate Harlow: 00:01:04

of your heart, because it is the only place to live from. Let me

Kate Harlow: 00:01:08

tell you I am sitting here in my adorable frickin cottage. I

Kate Harlow: 00:01:13

moved out of my apartment in Athens. Those of you who are new

Kate Harlow: 00:01:18

to the new truth, you're going to get the gist of my my life

Kate Harlow: 00:01:21

now, I left Athens, and it doesn't mean I'm not going back.

Kate Harlow: 00:01:26

I have the immersion in April. We still have a couple spots

Kate Harlow: 00:01:29

left if you're wanting to come to the immersion. The immersion

Kate Harlow: 00:01:32

is coming up in April in Corfu, Greece. So I will be back in

Kate Harlow: 00:01:35

Greece in the spring. But I for them for now, I have moved

Kate Harlow: 00:01:38

myself to Kenya and followed my heart, and I have the sweetest

Kate Harlow: 00:01:42

little cottage tucked in the jungle. It is. It actually feels

Kate Harlow: 00:01:47

a lot like Costa Rica in the area of Nairobi, where my

Kate Harlow: 00:01:50

cottage is. And I'm going to be spending half my time here and

Kate Harlow: 00:01:53

half my time at olapangi Farm, which I've talked a lot about,

Kate Harlow: 00:01:56

if you go back on the podcast, I spent four and a half months

Kate Harlow: 00:01:59

there last year. If you're new to me and I fell in love with

Kate Harlow: 00:02:03

Kenya. Now, Africa wasn't on my radar. I'd never planned to come

Kate Harlow: 00:02:07

here. I had no like, strong desire to come here, other than

Kate Harlow: 00:02:10

maybe one day. It was kind of in my, you know, the back of my

Kate Harlow: 00:02:13

mind one day. But there were so many other places I probably

Kate Harlow: 00:02:16

would have visited first, and yet the universe divinely

Kate Harlow: 00:02:21

orchestrated my path to send me to Kenya in February 2024, in

Kate Harlow: 00:02:25

fact, I was supposed to come May 2023 but the Greek government

Kate Harlow: 00:02:29

stopped me, or the Greek airport police stopped me and said,

Kate Harlow: 00:02:32

Don't leave Greece. Your your visa is not finalized, and there

Kate Harlow: 00:02:36

are some complications. So the first time I was supposed to

Kate Harlow: 00:02:41

come here, I didn't come. But I could feel the frequency of it

Kate Harlow: 00:02:41

in my heart and in my body. The whole time the retreat that I

Kate Harlow: 00:02:43

was supposed to be on was happening. The whole time that

Kate Harlow: 00:02:47

my friends were here, I could feel the frequency of this place

Kate Harlow: 00:02:50

and how special it is to me. And fast forward to February 2024

Kate Harlow: 00:02:55

when my dear friend Marianna and I led our first Kenya

Kate Harlow: 00:02:59

collaborative retreat together. We did two in 2024 at Ola Pankey

Kate Harlow: 00:03:04

farm. And I remember standing outside the farm listening to 10

Kate Harlow: 00:03:09

million birds. I just meditated for like 45 minutes to the sound

Kate Harlow: 00:03:13

of 10 million birds. And stood out and looked at the ridge, and

Kate Harlow: 00:03:17

I saw a giraffe crossing, and I was like crying, and I just, I

Kate Harlow: 00:03:21

just said, I think I want to live here. And at the time, it

Kate Harlow: 00:03:24

made no sense to me this statement. I thought I was just

Kate Harlow: 00:03:27

being excited, you know, that moved by the moment, but I felt

Kate Harlow: 00:03:33

this frequency in my heart and my body being in Kenya. And sure

Kate Harlow: 00:03:37

enough, the next time I came, as soon as I stepped off the

Kate Harlow: 00:03:40

airplane, I could smell something in the air. My heart

Kate Harlow: 00:03:43

expanded 10 times. Went back to Ola pangi farm, fell even deeper

Kate Harlow: 00:03:48

in love with everyone that works there, with Elizabeth and her

Kate Harlow: 00:03:51

team, and all of the friends that I had made. And you know,

Kate Harlow: 00:03:55

my heart was so clear. And this episode is all about learning to

Kate Harlow: 00:04:02

trust your heart, because the reason so many women are in

Kate Harlow: 00:04:04

suffering, the reason so many women are in pain and in discord

Kate Harlow: 00:04:10

within themselves and in their lives, is because they are

Kate Harlow: 00:04:13

ignoring their hearts. And if you ignore your heart, you will

Kate Harlow: 00:04:17

never find your joy. You will never live from your aliveness

Kate Harlow: 00:04:21

or your turn on, or your expansiveness or your creative

Kate Harlow: 00:04:25

expression, the heart is the magic of you, the magic of your

Kate Harlow: 00:04:30

soul, of the life that you're meant to live. When you learn to

Kate Harlow: 00:04:33

live from the frequency of your heart, and you learn to make

Kate Harlow: 00:04:36

decisions from your heart, your whole entire life will change.

Kate Harlow: 00:04:41

And it takes a lot of fucking courage, I'm going to say, to

Kate Harlow: 00:04:45

follow your heart. So I

Kate Harlow: 00:04:49

moved, you know, I had this. I kept coming back to Kenya. Every

Kate Harlow: 00:04:53

time I came was for a little bit longer. And this is all last

Kate Harlow: 00:04:56

year, 2024 and then a beginning of 2025 first. Time I came was

Kate Harlow: 00:05:00

two weeks. Second time I came was five weeks. Third time I

Kate Harlow: 00:05:04

came was nine weeks. And the end of the third time I was like,

Kate Harlow: 00:05:08

Okay, I'm I need to live here. I need to move here. Oh, it just

Kate Harlow: 00:05:13

started raining. It's rain season in Nairobi. It's amazing.

Kate Harlow: 00:05:16

It's like tropical rainstorms. So hopefully the Wi Fi keeps

Kate Harlow: 00:05:19

going. So I just it sounds so beautiful that I have a tin

Kate Harlow: 00:05:23

roof. I don't think you can hear it, but it's, it's a really

Kate Harlow: 00:05:26

lovely feeling and sound. So every time I came, I came for a

Kate Harlow: 00:05:30

little bit longer, right? A little bit longer. Now, every

Kate Harlow: 00:05:34

time and I would go back home, and I'd feel this like achy

Kate Harlow: 00:05:37

feeling, every time anyone talked about Kenya, every time

Kate Harlow: 00:05:41

anyone talked about Africa, anytime I want, I actually went

Kate Harlow: 00:05:44

down a Jane Goodall rabbit hole and watched, like, all her

Kate Harlow: 00:05:47

documentaries and all these interviews with her. And she

Kate Harlow: 00:05:50

just recently passed away this last week, and and I was just,

Kate Harlow: 00:05:55

like, really connecting with like that, this woman. I mean,

Kate Harlow: 00:05:58

she was like, in her 20s, and she came to Africa before

Kate Harlow: 00:06:01

television, so there wasn't like she didn't even know what she

Kate Harlow: 00:06:04

was walking into. And she lived in the bush and studied

Kate Harlow: 00:06:06

chimpanzees with a very small team of people. And like,

Kate Harlow: 00:06:09

really, on her own, lived in the bush of Africa for months on end

Kate Harlow: 00:06:15

to study these wild animals that are so similar to human beings.

Kate Harlow: 00:06:19

She followed the call of her heart, and she built an entire

Kate Harlow: 00:06:23

life purpose out of it. And there is a purpose episode

Kate Harlow: 00:06:26

coming soon that is so connected to the frequency of your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:06:29

if you do not learn how to live from your heart, you are not

Kate Harlow: 00:06:33

going to be happy or satiated or satisfied in your life. And if

Kate Harlow: 00:06:37

you feel a sense of like longing or emptiness or an ache for

Kate Harlow: 00:06:41

something else, the ache is inside of you, and all of the

Kate Harlow: 00:06:46

answers of what is aligned for you is inside of you. So I had

Kate Harlow: 00:06:52

this, this call to come to Africa again, like I didn't go

Kate Harlow: 00:06:56

seeking it. My best friend Mariana, called me and said,

Kate Harlow: 00:06:58

We're going to Kenya. I found a cool place where we can do

Kate Harlow: 00:07:02

retreats there. And as soon as she said the word Kenya, like I

Kate Harlow: 00:07:04

knew nothing about Kenya, and my heart just expanded every time I

Kate Harlow: 00:07:10

come here. My heart grows, my my my senses deepen. It is, it's

Kate Harlow: 00:07:16

really a profound experience. So I flew in. I actually ditched my

Kate Harlow: 00:07:20

parents, they're still in Greece. I've been here for over

Kate Harlow: 00:07:23

a week, and my parents are still in Greece on our annual holiday,

Kate Harlow: 00:07:27

and they're coming to Kenya in January. But I flew here, came

Kate Harlow: 00:07:32

to my cottage, dropped my bags, had about two hours here, and

Kate Harlow: 00:07:34

then went up to Ola pangi farm, and that is where the owner,

Kate Harlow: 00:07:40

Elizabeth and her beloved Kir, were getting married. And I, if

Kate Harlow: 00:07:43

you go back to an episode in April 2024 I have her on the

Kate Harlow: 00:07:48

podcast, and she shares her love story. So they, since got

Kate Harlow: 00:07:50

engaged, they they had the most extraordinary wedding, which I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:07:54

going to tell you all about, and and it was such a beautiful

Kate Harlow: 00:07:57

experience. Because to you know, I'm not a huge fan of weddings,

Kate Harlow: 00:08:00

I find them very scripted, very predictable, very fake, very

Kate Harlow: 00:08:05

like perfectionist. And this wedding was the opposite. It was

Kate Harlow: 00:08:10

like what Africa is to me. It was wild and it was free and it

Kate Harlow: 00:08:14

was different. It was unique. There was no tail death do us

Kate Harlow: 00:08:18

part. There was no like. Now we're doing this thing now.

Kate Harlow: 00:08:21

We're doing the speeches, the wedding itself. The ceremony

Kate Harlow: 00:08:24

itself was a dear friend who I'm actually having on the podcast

Kate Harlow: 00:08:28

soon. I'll, I'll share her name in the future, but a dear friend

Kate Harlow: 00:08:31

of Elizabeth and Kier married them, and all she did was share

Kate Harlow: 00:08:35

their love story. And it was hilarious, and it was, it was

Kate Harlow: 00:08:39

emotional. I was crying, I was laughing. It was such a

Kate Harlow: 00:08:42

beautiful journey. And that was the ceremony. Was her sharing

Kate Harlow: 00:08:46

the love story. And then Mr. Karaoke, this legend who lives

Kate Harlow: 00:08:50

on the property here, and he's in his 80s, and he's just like

Kate Harlow: 00:08:53

one of the most coolest medicine man you'll ever meet. And he did

Kate Harlow: 00:08:57

a little tribute to Elizabeth and everything she's done for

Kate Harlow: 00:09:00

the community and the land. And then he did a tribute to Kira,

Kate Harlow: 00:09:03

her partner, and it was the most beautiful, moving experience.

Kate Harlow: 00:09:06

And then it was just a party, and there was this epic Kenyan

Kate Harlow: 00:09:09

band, and we were all dancing and having bonfires and eating,

Kate Harlow: 00:09:15

and it was so celebratory, and it was so different. And it was

Kate Harlow: 00:09:18

all about expression and people wearing sequins or, like, wild

Kate Harlow: 00:09:22

feathers, or whatever. It was so authentic. It was so like, just

Kate Harlow: 00:09:26

an expression of community and collaboration. And, you know,

Kate Harlow: 00:09:31

I'm at the wedding, and every freaking conversation I have is

Kate Harlow: 00:09:34

with people who are living extraordinary lives, who are

Kate Harlow: 00:09:37

doing things totally different than the script, who are living

Kate Harlow: 00:09:41

in crazy places in the world, up to really amazing things, making

Kate Harlow: 00:09:44

a massive impact, loving what they do, loving their life,

Kate Harlow: 00:09:47

having greater love than they ever could have imagined. And

Kate Harlow: 00:09:50

everybody is about collaboration here. So I have, like, all these

Kate Harlow: 00:09:54

business partners now, all these ideas, all these creative

Kate Harlow: 00:09:56

ventures that are, you know, going to be little side projects

Kate Harlow: 00:09:59

of people with. People I've met, there is so much happening here.

Kate Harlow: 00:10:03

It's like fertile and it's not so separate. It's not so me

Kate Harlow: 00:10:07

against you and us against it's like because everyone is living

Kate Harlow: 00:10:11

in the frequency of the heart. So that's what I realized being

Kate Harlow: 00:10:14

here, is that that's why my heart called me here, because

Kate Harlow: 00:10:18

people who are Kenyan are like absolutely in the frequency of

Kate Harlow: 00:10:22

their heart, the heart. That's why I'm so in love with Kenyan

Kate Harlow: 00:10:24

people. And then people who are drawn to Kenya are also in the

Kate Harlow: 00:10:28

frequency of the heart. That's why they're drawn here. And

Kate Harlow: 00:10:30

they're living their lives in an unscripted way. They're

Kate Harlow: 00:10:33

following the pulse of the heart. So here are the three

Kate Harlow: 00:10:38

keys to trusting your heart and living from your heart. And the

Kate Harlow: 00:10:42

first thing to know is you've been taught to not trust your

Kate Harlow: 00:10:44

heart. You've been taught that you don't have the answers. How

Kate Harlow: 00:10:48

many times have you been in a situation like, let's say, you

Kate Harlow: 00:10:51

want to leave a relationship or a job, or you're dating someone

Kate Harlow: 00:10:54

new, and you tell your friend, okay, not all saboteur

Kate Harlow: 00:10:58

archetypes do this. The isolators might hold it in the

Kate Harlow: 00:11:00

controllers might try and just control the situation themselves

Kate Harlow: 00:11:03

and not ask for advice, but I think most women outsource their

Kate Harlow: 00:11:08

decisions right often, especially if it's in an arena

Kate Harlow: 00:11:11

like let's say you're really good at making decisions in

Kate Harlow: 00:11:14

business, but you don't trust yourself in love. So every time

Kate Harlow: 00:11:18

you date someone, or every time you go to break up with someone,

Kate Harlow: 00:11:20

or go to leave your job, you ask your friends, what do you think?

Kate Harlow: 00:11:24

That's one of the ways, one of the biggest ways we give our

Kate Harlow: 00:11:27

power away when we are following our heart. And here's the thing,

Kate Harlow: 00:11:32

a lot of people in your life aren't going to understand the

Kate Harlow: 00:11:35

path of your heart. So I think about my situation, can you

Kate Harlow: 00:11:39

imagine I went around and just asked everyone, like, Hey, I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:11:41

thinking of moving to Kenya. What do you think? Probably a

Kate Harlow: 00:11:44

lot of people would be like, Are you fucking crazy? What are you

Kate Harlow: 00:11:47

doing that is weird. How are you doing that? Why are you doing

Kate Harlow: 00:11:49

that? What are you doing that? What's your intention?

Kate Harlow: 00:11:53

But I have built a relationship with my heart over time, so the

Kate Harlow: 00:11:57

number one key, the first most important step to trusting your

Kate Harlow: 00:12:02

heart and being able to follow it so you can live from the

Kate Harlow: 00:12:05

frequency of your heart, which is where your most deepest,

Kate Harlow: 00:12:08

juiciest, richest life is. The most important thing is that you

Kate Harlow: 00:12:12

got to start building a relationship with your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:12:14

and this looks like your own relationship with your heart. As

Kate Harlow: 00:12:19

women, we've been taught to bond, through gossip, through

Kate Harlow: 00:12:22

outsourcing, through asking each other opinions. What do you

Kate Harlow: 00:12:25

think? What do you think? What do you think? But if you have a

Kate Harlow: 00:12:29

feeling in your heart that you desire something, hold it for

Kate Harlow: 00:12:33

yourself. Don't share it with everyone. Hold it for yourself.

Kate Harlow: 00:12:36

And sit with it. Sit within a meditation. Write about it. Get

Kate Harlow: 00:12:40

to know it, start to pay attention to it. So, for

Kate Harlow: 00:12:43

example, every time anyone I talked about Kenya with anyone

Kate Harlow: 00:12:47

or anyone mentioned Kenya to me as I was talking about it, I

Kate Harlow: 00:12:51

would get tingles in my Yoni, tingles in my heart, tingles all

Kate Harlow: 00:12:55

over my body, and it would be like as if I had a crush on this

Kate Harlow: 00:12:58

country, like my whole body would come alive every and still

Kate Harlow: 00:13:03

does, every single time someone talked about it. And I was like,

Kate Harlow: 00:13:06

Oh, my God, what is that? And, you know, life re orchestrated.

Kate Harlow: 00:13:11

I was supposed to be coming here in December for the artist in

Kate Harlow: 00:13:15

residence program again, and I was going to stay for like, four

Kate Harlow: 00:13:17

months. And then I got invited to this wedding, Elizabeth and

Kate Harlow: 00:13:21

Kira, the owners of Ola panguese wedding. And so immediately, my

Kate Harlow: 00:13:25

heart was a Yes, and I had a conflict. My mom and dad had

Kate Harlow: 00:13:28

already booked their trip to Greece to come see me one month

Kate Harlow: 00:13:32

in Greece, and I looked at the schedule, and basically I was

Kate Harlow: 00:13:36

going to be spending three of those weeks in Kenya, like if I

Kate Harlow: 00:13:41

went to this wedding, I'd be missing out on this experience

Kate Harlow: 00:13:43

with my parents. So I called them. We talked about it. They

Kate Harlow: 00:13:46

decided they would come for five weeks instead of four. So we had

Kate Harlow: 00:13:49

two weeks together. On the front end, they understood that I had

Kate Harlow: 00:13:52

to come to this wedding, and also that didn't make sense for

Kate Harlow: 00:13:54

me to come to the wedding, go all the way back to Greece and

Kate Harlow: 00:13:56

then come all the way back here. So we made an agreement, and

Kate Harlow: 00:14:00

they decided to have friends come stay in Crete with them,

Kate Harlow: 00:14:03

and then they're having some alone time now. And then they're

Kate Harlow: 00:14:05

gonna be hanging out in Athens with my friends. So we just had

Kate Harlow: 00:14:08

a conversation about it worked it out so that they would still

Kate Harlow: 00:14:11

feel like they got to have time with me on their trip, but they

Kate Harlow: 00:14:14

also got to have other experiences. And then I listened

Kate Harlow: 00:14:19

to the call, right? I was supposed to go to Kenya in

Kate Harlow: 00:14:21

November, end of November, and this wedding invitation came,

Kate Harlow: 00:14:25

and I felt so excited at the idea of being here sooner, which

Kate Harlow: 00:14:29

is like that was the indicator, right? So you have to build a

Kate Harlow: 00:14:34

relationship with your heart, because mostly people have been

Kate Harlow: 00:14:37

telling you to go against her. And you know, I think of my

Kate Harlow: 00:14:41

heart as as her, like she's she's almost separate from me.

Kate Harlow: 00:14:45

It's like I've got to protect her, I've got to honor her. I

Kate Harlow: 00:14:48

got to make space for her. I got to let her feel I've got to

Kate Harlow: 00:14:52

acknowledge her, celebrate her, like your heart is this precious

Kate Harlow: 00:14:56

gem, right, that lives in the cavern of your you. Your heart

Kate Harlow: 00:15:00

space, and you got to protect this precious gem, but not in a

Kate Harlow: 00:15:04

guarded way, right? That's what your saboteur has been guarding

Kate Harlow: 00:15:07

your heart for a long time, thinking she needs you to shut

Kate Harlow: 00:15:10

down, to hold back your feelings, to repress your truth,

Kate Harlow: 00:15:14

to follow that guy instead of yourself, like your saboteur has

Kate Harlow: 00:15:17

been guarding your heart for a long time. Your heart does not

Kate Harlow: 00:15:20

need guarding, but she needs someone to build a relationship.

Kate Harlow: 00:15:25

This is your heroine, to build a relationship with her, to listen

Kate Harlow: 00:15:27

to her, to make space for her, to actually start to make

Kate Harlow: 00:15:31

choices from this feeling, from this frequency. So as you go

Kate Harlow: 00:15:36

through your life, you're going to have moments and invitations

Kate Harlow: 00:15:40

and opportunities that come your way. And as you start to build a

Kate Harlow: 00:15:44

relationship with your heart, she's going to give you

Kate Harlow: 00:15:47

indicators of things like the things that are are actually a

Kate Harlow: 00:15:51

yes for you. And I've certainly talked about this many times

Kate Harlow: 00:15:55

before, when you listen to your heart, or when your heart speaks

Kate Harlow: 00:16:00

to your saboteur is always going to be right behind her with a

Kate Harlow: 00:16:03

whole bunch of reasons why you shouldn't follow her, and your

Kate Harlow: 00:16:06

saboteur is going to try and scare the shit out of you so you

Kate Harlow: 00:16:10

listen to her guarding instead of your heart. Yes. So, for

Kate Harlow: 00:16:15

example, every time I've come to Kenya, but especially this time,

Kate Harlow: 00:16:19

when I was giving up my apartment in Athens that no

Kate Harlow: 00:16:21

longer felt aligned. My saboteur kept coming back again and

Kate Harlow: 00:16:26

again, knocking on the door, being like, what are you doing?

Kate Harlow: 00:16:28

Are you serious? You're moving to Kenya and you're getting rid

Kate Harlow: 00:16:31

of this great apartment. What are you doing? Your life in

Kate Harlow: 00:16:34

Greece is so good. You have all these friends like, as if I can

Kate Harlow: 00:16:37

never go back there, as if I'm never going to be friends with

Kate Harlow: 00:16:40

these people anymore, right? She kept knocking on my door every

Kate Harlow: 00:16:44

few days, and I would sit with her, and I would spend time

Kate Harlow: 00:16:47

listening to her, and I would be like, Yeah, I understand that

Kate Harlow: 00:16:49

you feel afraid, and I know that I can trust my heart. I know it

Kate Harlow: 00:16:54

doesn't need to make sense to anybody else. So you see if I

Kate Harlow: 00:16:59

was like, if I don't make this space to actually hear her and

Kate Harlow: 00:17:03

give her an option to make a choice, and if I only let the

Kate Harlow: 00:17:10

fear make the choice, chances are I'm living with anxiety. If

Kate Harlow: 00:17:14

you're not living from the frequency of your heart, if

Kate Harlow: 00:17:16

you're not trusting your own heart, you probably feel

Kate Harlow: 00:17:19

anxious. And what the anxiety is is you going against your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:17:22

and then it creates this discord inside all the time. And you

Kate Harlow: 00:17:26

think the discord is all these other things, but it's actually

Kate Harlow: 00:17:29

just you not listening to your heart, so building a

Kate Harlow: 00:17:32

relationship with her, making space to actually hear her. And

Kate Harlow: 00:17:35

the second most important thing is that you do not ask for

Kate Harlow: 00:17:39

advice around the choice of your heart. So let's say you're in a

Kate Harlow: 00:17:43

relationship and it's feeling complete, you know, like I think

Kate Harlow: 00:17:47

of my last relationship, I just left. I love him deeply. We're

Kate Harlow: 00:17:50

still connected, and yet I knew in my heart that I was moving on

Kate Harlow: 00:17:55

to a next chapter in the relationship no longer fit. I

Kate Harlow: 00:17:59

didn't know why I didn't. It didn't quite make sense, because

Kate Harlow: 00:18:02

we were both, at the time in Athens, you know, and I was

Kate Harlow: 00:18:04

like, Well, I'm moving to Kenya. But am I really moving to Kenya?

Kate Harlow: 00:18:07

You know, to my logical, fear based, conditioned mind, did any

Kate Harlow: 00:18:11

of it make sense? No, right? But my heart knew I've outgrown this

Kate Harlow: 00:18:16

container, this container of Athens, this container of this

Kate Harlow: 00:18:19

apartment, this container of this relationship, my heart knew

Kate Harlow: 00:18:22

it was no longer aligned, but there's no script with your

Kate Harlow: 00:18:27

heart. There's no manual, there's no word. It doesn't make

Kate Harlow: 00:18:30

logical sense. So if you have heart clarity, and then you go

Kate Harlow: 00:18:35

tell your friends, hey, I'm trying to figure this out. What

Kate Harlow: 00:18:38

do you think you're most likely going to have people convince

Kate Harlow: 00:18:42

you to go against your heart. Sometimes it illuminates what

Kate Harlow: 00:18:45

your truth is like. If someone says, No, you shouldn't go to

Kate Harlow: 00:18:47

Kenya, it's gonna and you really want to, you're going to have a

Kate Harlow: 00:18:51

stronger feeling. That's a possibility, but also your if

Kate Harlow: 00:18:56

you if, if other people are feeding your fear, your fears

Kate Harlow: 00:19:00

only going to get louder, which is why you don't want to

Kate Harlow: 00:19:02

outsource those conversations. If you're starting to have a

Kate Harlow: 00:19:05

feeling like, Hmm, maybe my relationship is out of

Kate Harlow: 00:19:08

alignment. I'm like, something's quite something's feeling off

Kate Harlow: 00:19:11

and feeling this, like, desire for a new beginning. I'm feeling

Kate Harlow: 00:19:15

this desire for letting go, make space for that, write about it,

Kate Harlow: 00:19:20

let like, sit in meditation and actually just connect to your

Kate Harlow: 00:19:23

heart and don't have external conversations about it, right?

Kate Harlow: 00:19:28

And don't spend all your time in your head. Should I Stay or

Kate Harlow: 00:19:30

Should I Go trying to think about the decision? But actually

Kate Harlow: 00:19:33

just make space for the desire of your heart, because the

Kate Harlow: 00:19:36

desire is what's inside of your heart and your body, and you

Kate Harlow: 00:19:40

have to build a relationship with it first, and you have to

Kate Harlow: 00:19:43

practice, like, really letting your life be sacred. I think as

Kate Harlow: 00:19:48

women, we're often just like, in the story of like, Oh, what are

Kate Harlow: 00:19:50

you doing? What's happening now? What's the drama? What's the

Kate Harlow: 00:19:52

whatever? And we talk everything out with our friends, and forget

Kate Harlow: 00:19:56

that we can actually hold things, and I don't mean in a.

Kate Harlow: 00:19:59

Isolation way, if you're an isolator, this is this is

Kate Harlow: 00:20:02

different. This is just like hiding your feelings and hiding

Kate Harlow: 00:20:05

what's going on inside of you. But I'm talking about like with

Kate Harlow: 00:20:09

intention. You can hold desires that you're experiencing and not

Kate Harlow: 00:20:14

have to tell 10 of your friends, right? And not have to ask

Kate Harlow: 00:20:17

anyone else permission, but just explore this feeling. So I

Kate Harlow: 00:20:21

explored the feeling of Kenya. I had that feeling the first time

Kate Harlow: 00:20:25

I came like, I think I want to live here. It didn't make

Kate Harlow: 00:20:27

logical sense. It just was a feeling felt like home. And then

Kate Harlow: 00:20:31

every time I've come back since then, it felt more like home and

Kate Harlow: 00:20:35

more like home and more like home. So I've I've dabbled, and

Kate Harlow: 00:20:40

even me coming now, I have a cottage. My cottage contract is

Kate Harlow: 00:20:43

for six months, and then I'll see. I'm not attached. I'm not

Kate Harlow: 00:20:47

like, oh, I have to stay here forever, if it doesn't feel

Kate Harlow: 00:20:50

good. But I'm sitting here having this conversation with

Kate Harlow: 00:20:53

you about trusting the heart from the other side of the fear,

Kate Harlow: 00:20:57

right? I'm actually in Kenya now. I'm in my cottage. I do not

Kate Harlow: 00:21:01

miss my apartment for one second. This cottage is I

Kate Harlow: 00:21:04

haven't lived in a house since I was in high school or in like,

Kate Harlow: 00:21:07

you know, since I was my early 20s, with my family, like I've

Kate Harlow: 00:21:11

lived in apartment buildings for the last 20 years. And to be in

Kate Harlow: 00:21:16

a little cottage that's a home. It has an upstairs and a

Kate Harlow: 00:21:19

downstairs and a yard, and like so much, nature around and it's

Kate Harlow: 00:21:24

in community. I had, there's like eight other houses on the

Kate Harlow: 00:21:26

property, and I'm starting to get to know people on the

Kate Harlow: 00:21:28

property, and basically living in community, which is what I've

Kate Harlow: 00:21:32

desired for so long. And I'm sitting and I'm meeting the most

Kate Harlow: 00:21:35

extraordinary people. I went for dinner. I arrived to Nairobi on

Kate Harlow: 00:21:40

Monday after or no, wait, that's not true. Tuesday after the

Kate Harlow: 00:21:43

wedding. It is now Friday, and I just arrived here.

Kate Harlow: 00:21:49

Wait, it's not Friday, it's Sunday. I arrived on Tuesday, on

Kate Harlow: 00:21:53

Friday or Saturday night. I got invited to go to a dinner party.

Kate Harlow: 00:21:56

My first dinner party across town took me an hour in traffic

Kate Harlow: 00:21:59

to get there half an hour to get home. But a friend of mine that

Kate Harlow: 00:22:03

I met at the farm a couple of times, she and her husband were

Kate Harlow: 00:22:05

at the wedding. They have extraordinary lives. They have

Kate Harlow: 00:22:08

the most unscripted, like coolest businesses. They're

Kate Harlow: 00:22:11

super creative. They've done so well in following their hearts

Kate Harlow: 00:22:16

and pursuing their creative dreams. And they keep growing,

Kate Harlow: 00:22:19

and their creative dreams keep expanding, and they're so

Kate Harlow: 00:22:22

interesting. And I went to dinner at their place last

Kate Harlow: 00:22:26

night. And of course, I arrive, and they invited a couple to

Kate Harlow: 00:22:29

dinner who they didn't even know it was friends of their friends.

Kate Harlow: 00:22:33

And this couple said to me, I went, I gave them a hug and

Kate Harlow: 00:22:36

said, I'm Kate, and where are you guys from? And and they

Kate Harlow: 00:22:40

said, Oh, we're from Lebanon. But she said, I've actually been

Kate Harlow: 00:22:42

living in Greece for the last two years. And I was like, what

Kate Harlow: 00:22:45

where? And she said, Oh, Athens. And I was like, what, where? And

Kate Harlow: 00:22:50

she said, Metz. And I was like, oh my god, that is literally the

Kate Harlow: 00:22:53

neighborhood next to the neighborhood I lived in. And so

Kate Harlow: 00:22:56

I said, Do you go to did you ever go to 4m the coffee shop?

Kate Harlow: 00:22:59

And she said, yeah, that that's my favorite coffee shop. He

Kate Harlow: 00:23:02

makes the best coffee in the city. And I'm like, that's where

Kate Harlow: 00:23:05

I go every day, or went every day when I lived in Athens and

Kate Harlow: 00:23:08

met all of my friends, like, what are the chances? I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:23:10

seriously, I'm in Nairobi. This woman's from Lebanon, and she

Kate Harlow: 00:23:14

lived in Athens for two and a half years, and the host of the

Kate Harlow: 00:23:17

dinner party didn't even know that or know her. So what a

Kate Harlow: 00:23:22

beautiful, magical like when we follow our hearts. I have made

Kate Harlow: 00:23:26

so many friends. I'm going to this new gym here. It totally

Kate Harlow: 00:23:29

feels like Costa Rica. Everything's open and jungly,

Kate Harlow: 00:23:32

and you can hear the birds while you're working out. This morning

Kate Harlow: 00:23:35

is Sunday. I went to a workout class and you could hear it.

Kate Harlow: 00:23:38

There's a church right next door to the gym, which I didn't know

Kate Harlow: 00:23:41

because you can't see it, but it was like the most beautiful

Kate Harlow: 00:23:44

gospel music all morning. I'm for sure, going to church next

Kate Harlow: 00:23:47

week. I don't go to church, but I'm going just for the music. It

Kate Harlow: 00:23:49

was so beautiful. And the whole entire workout class there was

Kate Harlow: 00:23:54

this, like, singing, this, like, unbelievable music that I could

Kate Harlow: 00:24:00

hear while I was working out. So I'm just like pinching myself,

Kate Harlow: 00:24:03

like, where am I? You know, and this is just a wild adventure,

Kate Harlow: 00:24:07

and I have no idea how long of my story I'm going to be here.

Kate Harlow: 00:24:11

Maybe it's going to be a long time. I've met so many people

Kate Harlow: 00:24:15

who moved to Kenya and have been here for 30 years, the owners of

Kate Harlow: 00:24:18

my house. She was born here, and her husband came from Scotland

Kate Harlow: 00:24:21

30 years ago and never left. It is a magical place. But this

Kate Harlow: 00:24:26

episode is not about Kenya. I mean, if you feel the call, come

Kate Harlow: 00:24:29

visit, for sure, there's been lots of heroines. There's a

Kate Harlow: 00:24:31

retreat in February. But it's, it's full heroines, but it, you

Kate Harlow: 00:24:36

know, if you feel the call, you come. But it's not about Kenya.

Kate Harlow: 00:24:39

It's about following your heart and getting to know yours. And

Kate Harlow: 00:24:42

you know, I remember on the early days when I was following

Kate Harlow: 00:24:44

my heart. I've for sure, shared this story before. I got invited

Kate Harlow: 00:24:48

to be in the musical Jesus Christ Superstar, many years

Kate Harlow: 00:24:50

ago. And immediately my first response was like, Oh my God,

Kate Harlow: 00:24:54

that would be amazing. I love that musical. And my heart just

Kate Harlow: 00:24:57

exploded. And then right after that, it. Like, Oh, actually,

Kate Harlow: 00:25:01

it's not possible. I'm too busy. There's no way. I don't even

Kate Harlow: 00:25:04

have energy now, and I'm working so much, I'm traveling with

Kate Harlow: 00:25:07

work. Like there's no way I can do it. And thankfully, there was

Kate Harlow: 00:25:11

somebody there with me who witnessed my excitement, and he

Kate Harlow: 00:25:13

was my boyfriend at the time, and he was like, you're doing

Kate Harlow: 00:25:16

that musical. Like, are you kidding me? I've never seen you

Kate Harlow: 00:25:18

so lit up in in the since I've known you, and that was the

Kate Harlow: 00:25:22

indicator that it was my heart, right? You see how fast the

Kate Harlow: 00:25:25

saboteur comes in and wants to trumpet the your saboteur will

Kate Harlow: 00:25:28

try and take that joy away, not because she hates you, not

Kate Harlow: 00:25:31

because she's she's trying to hurt you, but because she

Kate Harlow: 00:25:34

believes that you being in your most expanded, most expressed

Kate Harlow: 00:25:38

heart frequency self is dangerous, because once upon a

Kate Harlow: 00:25:41

time, you were a child and you were living in that place, and

Kate Harlow: 00:25:43

you constantly got in trouble for it. You constantly got shut

Kate Harlow: 00:25:47

down. You constantly got taught somebody else had the answer,

Kate Harlow: 00:25:50

not you, that somebody else knew what was better for you, not

Kate Harlow: 00:25:54

you, that there was something else you should be doing rather

Kate Harlow: 00:25:56

than the thing that feels good, right? So that part of you

Kate Harlow: 00:25:59

thinks is dangerous, but it actually isn't. What's dangerous

Kate Harlow: 00:26:04

is ignoring your heart and not following the frequency of your

Kate Harlow: 00:26:07

heart. So, you know, I was hearing from a woman, I was just

Kate Harlow: 00:26:11

having a conversation with, a woman who's was having some

Kate Harlow: 00:26:13

struggles, and I was thinking, you know, my response to her was

Kate Harlow: 00:26:17

like, every single like, the only answer is, you're not

Kate Harlow: 00:26:19

listening to the frequency of your heart, like you keep

Kate Harlow: 00:26:21

staying in all these places that don't places that don't feel

Kate Harlow: 00:26:23

good, and going against the truth, and staying in the job

Kate Harlow: 00:26:26

that feels horrible, and working insane hours, and living in a

Kate Harlow: 00:26:30

city that doesn't feel good, and being a relationship that

Kate Harlow: 00:26:32

doesn't feel good, being in friendships that don't feel

Kate Harlow: 00:26:34

aligned, and then telling yourself it's this is the only

Kate Harlow: 00:26:37

option, right? If you are not happy, you are not living from

Kate Harlow: 00:26:41

your heart. When you live from the frequency of your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:26:44

there's this deep and it's not like, you know, I think often we

Kate Harlow: 00:26:48

think in terms of, like, really high highs and really low lows.

Kate Harlow: 00:26:51

It's not like that. When you're living from the frequency of

Kate Harlow: 00:26:54

your heart, it is just, it's grounded, but it's like, juicy

Kate Harlow: 00:26:59

and satiating and rich and meaningful. And you know that

Kate Harlow: 00:27:05

the thing is, like it is in the unknown of what like me saying

Kate Harlow: 00:27:10

yes to Jesus Christ, superstar, and then that experience was one

Kate Harlow: 00:27:14

of the best experiences of my whole entire life, especially

Kate Harlow: 00:27:18

the week of the show and the dress rehearsals. Like I cannot

Kate Harlow: 00:27:21

think of it or no, that's not true. I've had many times like

Kate Harlow: 00:27:24

that. But like the collective energy, the bonding with the

Kate Harlow: 00:27:27

cast, the community, the singing, the dancing, the

Kate Harlow: 00:27:30

performing, the being on stage like that brings my soul alive.

Kate Harlow: 00:27:35

Old me was afraid of that. I was afraid of being on stage. I was

Kate Harlow: 00:27:38

afraid of being in the spotlight, right? So if my fear

Kate Harlow: 00:27:41

was making the decision, I would have found a lot of distractions

Kate Harlow: 00:27:43

to not follow that and honor that. But I think, like, wow,

Kate Harlow: 00:27:48

what would my life be had I not followed that, and then the next

Kate Harlow: 00:27:52

thing, and then the next thing. So first thing is to build a

Kate Harlow: 00:27:55

relationship with your heart and start making choices, even small

Kate Harlow: 00:27:58

ones from her right? Let's say there's like, a little desire to

Kate Harlow: 00:28:03

go on a camping trip with your friends, or, I guess we're going

Kate Harlow: 00:28:05

into winter. I'm going into summer over here, but they're

Kate Harlow: 00:28:07

down here, but most people are going into winter. If you are,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:12

it's like, okay, maybe it's not camping, but maybe it's like,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:14

going to, I don't know, a musical, or going skiing for the

Kate Harlow: 00:28:17

weekend, or whatever. Like, you have this desire in your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:20

if you like, always desire to do this like sexy dance class, but

Kate Harlow: 00:28:24

your your saboteur is like, No, you're too overweight, you're

Kate Harlow: 00:28:27

too unattractive, you're too uncoordinated, you're not,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:30

you're not, you're gonna embarrass yourself. Follow the

Kate Harlow: 00:28:33

cue of the heart, right? Let your saboteur vent, let her

Kate Harlow: 00:28:37

share her fear, and don't follow her. That is like you have to

Kate Harlow: 00:28:42

build the trust. Trust doesn't just happen. You have been

Kate Harlow: 00:28:46

programmed to not trust yourself. You have to rebuild

Kate Harlow: 00:28:48

that muscle, right? And you have to say yes over and over again.

Kate Harlow: 00:28:51

So I said yes to Jesus Christ Superstar. I said yes to

Kate Harlow: 00:28:54

starting this business. I said yes to the podcast. I said yes

Kate Harlow: 00:28:58

to doing retreats in Africa and in Greece, I said yes to moving

Kate Harlow: 00:29:03

to Greece on a whim because my heart said yes. I said yes to

Kate Harlow: 00:29:07

coming to Kenya. I said, like all of the things that I've said

Kate Harlow: 00:29:11

yes to, there's 10 million that's just a tiny snippet, but

Kate Harlow: 00:29:15

I say yes over and over and over and over again. Now it's

Kate Harlow: 00:29:18

impossible to not now I can't I don't ask anyone. Didn't ask

Kate Harlow: 00:29:21

anyone if I should go to Kenya. Not even Mariana, my my closest

Kate Harlow: 00:29:26

friend, you know, our Chell or Andy. I didn't ask any of them.

Kate Harlow: 00:29:31

I didn't ask anyone what they I thought that I should do. I was

Kate Harlow: 00:29:34

like, I'm going to Kenya. I'm moving to Kenya. And it was just

Kate Harlow: 00:29:39

like, I don't know for how long, I don't know why, but I'm moving

Kate Harlow: 00:29:42

to Kenya. My heart is home there, and I'm following it, and

Kate Harlow: 00:29:46

let's see. And you know, I'm so excited for this podcast. One

Kate Harlow: 00:29:51

year from now, you and I are going to be having a

Kate Harlow: 00:29:52

conversation, and my life's going to look different, and I

Kate Harlow: 00:29:55

don't even know what it's going to look like, but that's the

Kate Harlow: 00:29:58

beauty of living from the. Frequency of the heart is the

Kate Harlow: 00:30:02

journey of expansive experiences and cool people that you meet

Kate Harlow: 00:30:07

and amazing you know, new parts of yourself you discover it's

Kate Harlow: 00:30:12

never ending. You know, I was having a chat with one of my

Kate Harlow: 00:30:16

heroine one of my heroine sisters, the other day about the

Kate Harlow: 00:30:21

journey and her saboteur, was like, oh, you know, I know how

Kate Harlow: 00:30:25

you say it never ends. It's just like, Oh, I gotta do more work,

Kate Harlow: 00:30:29

and the work never ends. And I'm like, No, that's why I don't

Kate Harlow: 00:30:31

call it work. It's a treasure hunt. It's actually an exciting

Kate Harlow: 00:30:35

thing that it never ends. Because what never ends is your

Kate Harlow: 00:30:39

your ability to meet new parts of yourself, and the only way we

Kate Harlow: 00:30:43

meet new parts of ourselves is by doing new things when we are

Kate Harlow: 00:30:47

following the call of the heart and not letting the fear based

Kate Harlow: 00:30:50

mind make the decisions right. That's the only way we meet new

Kate Harlow: 00:30:53

parts of ourselves. So the more you follow your heart and take

Kate Harlow: 00:30:56

risks and make courageous choices and do things

Kate Harlow: 00:30:59

differently, and just listen to that, that nudge, that's there,

Kate Harlow: 00:31:03

even if it's terrifying. You jump off the cliff, not

Kate Harlow: 00:31:06

literally, but you take those risks. You move to that place.

Kate Harlow: 00:31:10

You leave that relationship. You, you go on that date, you,

Kate Harlow: 00:31:15

you, you join that group, you start that nonprofit, you take

Kate Harlow: 00:31:20

that dance class, the more you do that, your nervous system

Kate Harlow: 00:31:24

will become so regulated, like I had chronic anxiety when I was

Kate Harlow: 00:31:28

living my when my life was a scripted lie, when I was trying

Kate Harlow: 00:31:32

to squeeze myself into the script, and I was lying to

Kate Harlow: 00:31:34

myself constantly about my true desires, and I was saying yes to

Kate Harlow: 00:31:37

things that were actually a no to my heart. I was chronically

Kate Harlow: 00:31:40

anxious. I couldn't sleep at night. I had the worst

Kate Harlow: 00:31:43

constipation. I was a wreck on the inside. Hated myself, and

Kate Harlow: 00:31:48

now I'm like, knock on wood. I never have anxiety,

Kate Harlow: 00:31:52

circumstantial, but anxiety is not in my system. My nervous

Kate Harlow: 00:31:57

system is so regulated, the most common thing I reflection I get

Kate Harlow: 00:32:00

from people is how calm they feel when they're around me, and

Kate Harlow: 00:32:03

how children tell me that all the time. Actually, I've had so

Kate Harlow: 00:32:07

many children. I was staying with my bestie this summer and

Kate Harlow: 00:32:10

her her stepdaughter, said I love being around Kate, because

Kate Harlow: 00:32:13

I feel so calm when I'm with her, and she's so grounding to

Kate Harlow: 00:32:17

be around. Okay, that was not me before, when I was not living

Kate Harlow: 00:32:21

from the frequency of the heart, I was an anxious wreck. I was

Kate Harlow: 00:32:25

not I was bubbly and happy, but it was very fake and was not

Kate Harlow: 00:32:30

calm to be around. So that's like one of the greatest gifts

Kate Harlow: 00:32:32

of living from your heart and trusting your heart is like all

Kate Harlow: 00:32:35

that anxiety goes away. You don't have to go to the doctor

Kate Harlow: 00:32:37

and numb your pain. It goes away because you're listening to your

Kate Harlow: 00:32:41

heart, all anxiety is is telling you you're not you're going

Kate Harlow: 00:32:44

against the truth of who you are. That's it. It's just an

Kate Harlow: 00:32:47

indicator. Ding, ding, ding. You're going against the truth

Kate Harlow: 00:32:49

of who you are. You're believing something that's not true about

Kate Harlow: 00:32:51

yourself. You're telling yourself something that's not

Kate Harlow: 00:32:53

true. You're saying yes to something that's a no. You're

Kate Harlow: 00:32:55

saying no to something that's a yes. That's what causes anxiety.

Kate Harlow: 00:32:59

So build a relationship with your heart. Don't ask for other

Kate Harlow: 00:33:01

people's advice. You need to build it yourself. You need to

Kate Harlow: 00:33:06

learn to follow your heart without getting opinions and

Kate Harlow: 00:33:09

just telling people this is what I'm doing. The couple that I met

Kate Harlow: 00:33:12

at dinner last night from Lebanon, they're climbing Mount

Kate Harlow: 00:33:16

Kilimanjaro on Monday, and they're just so clear, and

Kate Harlow: 00:33:20

they're not hikers or anything. They're just like, that's what

Kate Harlow: 00:33:23

we're doing. And we had the most hilarious conversations about

Kate Harlow: 00:33:26

it. Laughed our heads off. It was such a beautiful night, but

Kate Harlow: 00:33:29

they're going to Kilimanjaro. It's just that's it. And like,

Kate Harlow: 00:33:32

people here do wild things, like ears is so cool. Living in a

Kate Harlow: 00:33:37

place where people are like, it's everyone I meet is so

Kate Harlow: 00:33:41

interesting and living these wild unscripted lives, which is

Kate Harlow: 00:33:44

probably why my wild unscripted heart was drawn here, right? And

Kate Harlow: 00:33:48

I don't feel good in North America, because so many people

Kate Harlow: 00:33:50

are still following the script and trying to be the good girl

Kate Harlow: 00:33:53

and trying to be perfect, and trying to do it right, and

Kate Harlow: 00:33:55

trying to sacrifice themselves for everyone, and trying to be

Kate Harlow: 00:33:58

successful, trying to get to the next thing and the next thing

Kate Harlow: 00:34:00

and the next thing. Meanwhile, nobody's living, nobody's

Kate Harlow: 00:34:03

birthing these amazing things, nobody's creating, nobody's

Kate Harlow: 00:34:06

collaborating, everybody's alone in their box, miserable. Not

Kate Harlow: 00:34:10

everyone, obviously. But that's my experience of being in North

Kate Harlow: 00:34:14

America, that there's this, like, this is kind of in the air

Kate Harlow: 00:34:18

there. So you get to be a rebel. It's kind of funny, like the

Kate Harlow: 00:34:23

truest rebel of all is the one who follows her heart, is the

Kate Harlow: 00:34:26

one who doesn't do what everyone else is doing. And is like,

Kate Harlow: 00:34:29

actually, I'm gonna go that way, because I have this feeling, and

Kate Harlow: 00:34:32

I don't know why, but I'm going there. And then what happens is,

Kate Harlow: 00:34:38

when she leads your heart, leads you start to collect evidence.

Kate Harlow: 00:34:42

And this is number three, you want to actively write down the

Kate Harlow: 00:34:45

evidence, even now of all the times you followed your heart

Kate Harlow: 00:34:49

and then how you felt after and what actually happened when you

Kate Harlow: 00:34:52

had the courage to hop on that ferry and go to that Greek

Kate Harlow: 00:34:56

island by yourself, instead of do what everyone else was doing,

Kate Harlow: 00:34:58

or to to. To go on that camping trip when you were terrified, to

Kate Harlow: 00:35:03

camp in the wild with lions and elephants. That was me last

Kate Harlow: 00:35:07

year, or whatever, whatever the thing is, right? Write down all

Kate Harlow: 00:35:11

of the times that you actually listen to your heart

Kate Harlow: 00:35:15

and what was the impact. How did it change your life? How did it

Kate Harlow: 00:35:19

affect you? How did you feel before, during and after? How

Kate Harlow: 00:35:23

loud did your saboteur get? How loud did your saboteur try and

Kate Harlow: 00:35:26

take you out? How much did your saboteur try and take you out?

Kate Harlow: 00:35:29

And did you make new choices? Collect evidence because you're

Kate Harlow: 00:35:34

it is not logical, following your heart. It's not linear.

Kate Harlow: 00:35:37

It's not logical. She's always going to want to do the thing

Kate Harlow: 00:35:41

that is that's logical, that's practical, she's going to want

Kate Harlow: 00:35:43

to look around. Your saboteur looks around and goes, Oh no, we

Kate Harlow: 00:35:46

need to fit in. We need to belong with everyone else. And

Kate Harlow: 00:35:49

they're all going that way, so I can't go that way. I got to do

Kate Harlow: 00:35:52

what everyone else is doing. Meanwhile, if you do what

Kate Harlow: 00:35:54

everyone else is doing, you are following the script, and you

Kate Harlow: 00:35:57

will never be happy inside of that place. There is no soul

Kate Harlow: 00:36:00

satisfaction, satiation, turn on, joy, aliveness, vitality,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:05

expansiveness, magical, epic opportunities, synchronicities,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:09

all of that doesn't exist when you follow the script. It only

Kate Harlow: 00:36:11

exists when you follow your heart, but when you follow your

Kate Harlow: 00:36:14

heart, it's constant. It's constant. I can't even believe

Kate Harlow: 00:36:17

the magic I'm experiencing right now. Like, and I just arrived,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:21

and it's just like, and it's so grounded, you know, being in

Kate Harlow: 00:36:26

this cottage, I'm just like, I wake up in the morning. I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:36:28

like, this. It's a it's a perfect bed. It's about, like,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:32

every everything about, I have a cat, I have a fire. I don't know

Kate Harlow: 00:36:35

how to build a fire, but my friend built one for me last

Kate Harlow: 00:36:38

night. I have no idea how to build a fire, but I'm learning,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:43

and I My Friend's Boyfriend built one for me, and I'm gonna

Kate Harlow: 00:36:47

light it tonight. He just like, set it up for me. But it's like,

Kate Harlow: 00:36:50

I've got this new life out here, and I'm learning and I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:36:54

growing. And does it come without discomfort? No, of

Kate Harlow: 00:36:57

course, there's discomfort, right? It's scary to go into the

Kate Harlow: 00:37:01

unknown, but my loves, that's where you will meet all of who

Kate Harlow: 00:37:05

you are. That's where you'll grow the most, and that's where

Kate Harlow: 00:37:09

you'll have the most regulated nervous system and the calmest

Kate Harlow: 00:37:12

inner world, because your heart knows where you're meant to be.

Kate Harlow: 00:37:15

That's the beauty. Your heart is your gateway. It's your compass.

Kate Harlow: 00:37:20

It is your GPS. Your heart knows where you're meant to be, what

Kate Harlow: 00:37:24

rooms you're meant to be in, what relationships are aligned,

Kate Harlow: 00:37:27

what friendships are aligned, what places you're meant to live

Kate Harlow: 00:37:30

in, what experiences you're meant to have. And most of us

Kate Harlow: 00:37:33

are so used to letting fear drive and make the decisions,

Kate Harlow: 00:37:36

but when you live from the frequency of the heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:37:39

everything changes, and there's so much in store for you. I know

Kate Harlow: 00:37:46

I've said that 10 million times, but my my goodness, that's the

Kate Harlow: 00:37:50

only answer. If you're miserable, you're not listening

Kate Harlow: 00:37:53

to your heart. So spend some time in meditation, in

Kate Harlow: 00:37:57

reflection, in writing, in exploration, exploring like what

Kate Harlow: 00:38:01

heart nudges have I been ignoring? What heart nudges have

Kate Harlow: 00:38:05

I followed in the past that have led me to where I want to be?

Kate Harlow: 00:38:08

What does my heart ache for? You might not even know right now,

Kate Harlow: 00:38:11

but start the conversation now. Start to create the space. And

Kate Harlow: 00:38:15

if you are just go, go, go, go, go, go, do, do, do, do, do. And

Kate Harlow: 00:38:18

you have no space for your heart and no time with to be present

Kate Harlow: 00:38:21

with yourself. You might miss all the guidance, but the

Kate Harlow: 00:38:25

guidance is inside. Nobody else has the answer, no. Psychic, no.

Kate Harlow: 00:38:29

I mean, when you talk to a psychic, if your heart lights up

Kate Harlow: 00:38:31

when she says something, that's an indicator. But no psychic, no

Kate Harlow: 00:38:35

best friend, no boyfriend, no doctor, no no guru, no tarot

Kate Harlow: 00:38:41

card reader. Nobody knows what is true for you and your heart,

Kate Harlow: 00:38:45

except you. So if you don't slow down and create this space, you

Kate Harlow: 00:38:49

will miss the signals, you will miss the indicators, and you

Kate Harlow: 00:38:54

will keep perpetuating suffering. So if you want to

Kate Harlow: 00:38:57

live a life where you feel alive and inspired and ignited and

Kate Harlow: 00:39:03

creative, and you love what you do and who you are and where you

Kate Harlow: 00:39:07

are and like it all comes from Living from the heart and

Kate Harlow: 00:39:10

listening to her. So that's it for this week. I hope you

Kate Harlow: 00:39:14

enjoyed it. Please share this episode with every woman you

Kate Harlow: 00:39:16

know who's ready and needs to start to listen to the frequency

Kate Harlow: 00:39:20

of her heart and to trust herself more as women, that's

Kate Harlow: 00:39:24

what the world needs more than ever. As women fucking trusting

Kate Harlow: 00:39:27

themselves, not trusting everybody else, and then

Kate Harlow: 00:39:30

constantly feeling like shit inside, we need a world of women

Kate Harlow: 00:39:34

who rise and take Have courage and take risks and trust

Kate Harlow: 00:39:38

themselves to know the truth, to have their own answers. Trust

Kate Harlow: 00:39:44

lives inside of you, and it has to be built, and you have to

Kate Harlow: 00:39:47

dedicate and devote yourself to it. But let me tell you, from

Kate Harlow: 00:39:50

over here in my little cottage in in Kenya, your heart is so

Kate Harlow: 00:39:56

wise and will lead you to the most magical places. So. I love

Kate Harlow: 00:40:01

you. Would love to hear from you. Send reviews would be

Kate Harlow: 00:40:05

great. I have lots of exciting guests coming up too. Someone

Kate Harlow: 00:40:09

you might know really intimately is coming up in a few weeks. So

Kate Harlow: 00:40:11

excited to share an old friend of yours and a dear friend of

Kate Harlow: 00:40:15

mine on the podcast in a couple of weeks, and that's all I'm

Kate Harlow: 00:40:19

going to say. But would love to hear from you. If you have any

Kate Harlow: 00:40:23

topics you want to want me to talk about, please bring them to

Kate Harlow: 00:40:26

me. Send me a DM or a private message on Facebook or

Kate Harlow: 00:40:29

Instagram. Kate Harlow or the unscripted woman, and I'll see

Kate Harlow: 00:40:33

you next week.