Walking with the Lord often means walking through seasons of pruning—times when God calls us to leave behind places, people, or positions that once felt central to our lives. In this message, Nina Pajonas shares her personal journey of being led to leave a church community, how worship carried her through the loss, and how God used even the hardest goodbyes to prepare her for a greater purpose.

From memories of brokenness to reminders of grace, this episode is a testimony that pruning is never punishment—it is preparation. Through scripture, personal stories, and Spirit-led encouragement, you’ll be reminded that when God moves the pillar, it’s time to move with Him.

If today’s message spoke to you, please share it with a friend and follow Born to be a Butterfly so you never miss an episode. 

📖 Ready to dive deeper into healing and transformation? Get my book, From Broken to Butterfly, on Amazon today! 

📩 If you have any questions or want to connect, send me a DM on Instagram at Born To Be A Butterfly or email me at ninapajonas@gmail.com. I love hearing from you! 

Remember, the Lord can turn your wounds into wings—you were Born to be a Butterfly! 🦋

Born to be a Butterfly © 2025 Nina Pajonas All rights reserved. The content of this podcast is for informational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. For the full disclaimer, visit ⁠ninapajonas.com.

Welcome to Born to be a Butterfly,

where we embrace healing and growth in Christ so that we can experience true transformation.

My name is Nina Pajonis, and I pray that today's message ministers to you.

If you walk with the Lord long enough,

you'll know when he wants you to stop doing something or when he wants you to leave some someplace.

The Lord will make you so uncomfortable that it might even feel painful at times.

But hear me clearly when I say this.

It doesn't mean that the place was bad for you, although perhaps in some circumstances it might have been.

It could simply mean that God feels you've outgrown it, or that he needs you to be his hands and feet elsewhere.

Such seasons can be hard on our hearts, but we must know that it's for the greater good.

We must believe in what the Lord has for us and what he wants for us more than anything else in our lives.

Our trust must always lie in Him.

It's easy to think of pruning as punishment, but that's not what it is.

It's preparation.

It's about provision.

And I know that that sounds ridiculous because pruning involves things being removed.

But how do you make room for the new if you don't let go of the old?

How do you transition into a new season if you're not willing to leave the last one?

We will never reach the promised land if we don't make it through the wilderness.

And we will never even get to the wilderness if we never leave our version of Egypt.

The only way to step into your future is to step out in faith.

Fear had the Israelites complaining about everything new and longing for for the old.

They made it clear that they would rather return to the pain than reach for the promise.

But love.

Love will let us leave because we follow the One who first loved us.

Every step of obedience grows our faith because he equips us and provides for us along the way.

I'm speaking about this topic because I'm living it.

I have been pruned excessively by the Lord.

There are things that were removed and also things that I had to walk away from, one of which was the church that I used to attend.

For those of you who don't know,

I found that church while I was in rehab for alcoholism.

It was there that I reencountered God after running away from him since the age of 17 in the first service at their former location.

I felt the presence of the Lord so profoundly that it could not be denied.

And it changed my life forever.

I continued to be a part of that church for a long time.

Seven years of my life, to be exact,

which also included the first seven years of my sobriety journey.

I began my life of service in their children's ministry,

and then after that,

I was on their worship team.

Then I went on to help build a healing ministry within the church from the ground up.

It was an incredible experience.

It's also how I finally realized that God had called me to women's ministry.

That's where I started writing sermons and preaching and a lot of other things that I love doing today.

I grew abundantly within that church,

and I write all about it in my first book.

And yet I was clearly told by the Lord that I had to leave.

I was devastated when I realized that was the direction that he was taking me in.

For quite some time, I could feel that God was guiding me towards the door,

but my heart didn't want to believe it or accept it.

Inevitably,

I had to.

And it forced me to make one of the hardest decisions I've ever made in my life.

I remember praying one night and saying to the Lord,

you've pruned me so much that I feel like a branch that's not even on a tree.

I feel like a branch that's stuck in the dirt.

Like any twigs or leaves that I had were gone.

I felt completely stripped bare.

And believe it or not, then I started laughing.

And I told the Lord,

I feel like Baby Groot from Guardians of the Galaxy.

And all I could imagine in my head was Baby Groot dancing at the end of the movie, and I think he's dancing to the Jackson 5. And anyway, I mean, I just started laughing out loud.

And I imagined that God was probably laughing with me or at me,

but either way,

I was crying out to the Lord that it felt like I was starting over from scratch.

And in my season of loss, here's what kept me going.

I sang.

Worship became my lifeline.

I have sung my way through a lot of loss.

One of my favorite songs to sing is I Believe by CeCe Winans.

Because I'm declaring to myself and to God.

I believe in what you told me. I believe in the promises you made to me. I still believe.

They say this mountain can't be moved, they say these chains will never break, but they don't know you like we do. There is power in your name.

Anyway, that is just the beginning of the song.

But if you know it, you know that Cece kills it.

I love her voice, and I love that song because it's so uplifting.

It will truly remind you of who God is and what he can do.

So if you've never heard it, I would suggest that you go listen to it anyway.

Moving on.

Every time I sing that song,

I imagine the enemy getting angry.

And that makes me sing it even louder because I want to rub my faith right into his face.

And now I want to tell you about something that happened to me the other day.

I was driving around in my car kind of aimlessly because I was thinking about some things.

And before I knew it,

I realized that I was in a part of town that I hadn't been in for years.

And the reason I hadn't been there in years is because I used to live on that side of town.

When I was drinking,

I purposely avoid that area because of the bad memories.

But that day, my car just seemed to be driving there.

And I thought to myself,

What am I doing?

I don't like coming over here.

And then I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me as if to say,

keep going.

I drove past my old apartment complex and into the parking lot of a shopping center with a Winn-Dixie and a few other stores in it.

As I drove in,

I realized that some of the places I remembered were gone.

The plaza looked run-down.

And I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me again.

But this time it was to go inside the Winn-Dixie.

So I parked my car, but I didn't want to get out of it.

I thought to myself, why would I go in that supermarket?

There's nothing for me in there.

So I sat in my car for about 20 minutes, reflecting.

Memories came flooding back.

I thought about how I used to go to Walgreens to get my wine, or how I scraped change together to go to McDonald's and order off the dollar menu because that's all I could afford until payday.

I was remembering all of it.

And then suddenly, when I thought about walking inside Winn-Dixie,

I got scared.

And I thought to myself, what if somebody recognizes me?

But the Holy Spirit kept nudging me.

So I finally got out of my car and walked inside.

When I finally walked through the doors of the Winn Dixie,

I did not expect what happened.

I felt a surge of joy in my soul.

I thought to myself,

I'm walking in here as a completely different woman because God saved me.

I realized how silly it was for me to worry that somebody might recognize me.

I don't even look the same anymore.

But the biggest difference between then and now is not my appearance.

It's the state of my soul.

As I walked up and down the aisles of the store,

the Lord reminded me of his grace and mercy.

I came back to the Lord almost eight years ago, and during that time, He has awakened spiritual gifts within me that I never knew I had.

He has developed my writing,

strengthened my singing,

led me to preaching and teaching others.

He has given me a life of purpose.

My time with the Lord has taught me that pruning is not punishment,

It's preparation for advancement.

The first time I lost everything,

It was because of who I was and what I was doing back then.

But this time the losses are different.

They are the things that God has asked me to surrender,

things that I have willingly given up because I place all of my hope and all of my trust in Him.

When the Lord tells us we have to let something go, we have to let it go.

If his oil is no longer on something, we can't stay like the Israelites in the wilderness. When the pillar moved, they had to move too, and we must do the same.

If you remember nothing else from this episode,

Please remember when you find yourself in the valley, in the wilderness,

or in a season of transition:

Don't focus on your feelings.

Focus on his faithfulness.

And now I'm going to ask you a few questions.

1. Has God ever made you so uncomfortable that you knew it was time to move on?

2. What is one area of your life you might be holding onto that the Lord is asking you to release?

3. How can you reframe pruning in your life as preparation rather than punishment?

Let's pray.

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for loving us enough to prune us when you make life uncomfortable.

Help us to trust that it is not to harm us, but to grow us.

Give us the courage to release what no longer serves your purpose and the faith to embrace the new season that you are preparing.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

If today's message spoke to you,

Please share it with a friend and follow Born to Be a Butterfly so you never miss an episode.

If you're ready to dive deeper into my story of healing and transformation,

You can get my book, From Broken to Butterfly, on Amazon.

If you have any questions or would like to connect,

Please send me a DM on Instagram @ Born to be a Butterfly, or you can email me at me@ninapagonasmail.com. Until next time,

Remember,

The Lord can turn your wounds into wings.

You were born to be a butterfly.