Pets, queer stylings of the mid-90's, first jobs, and as usual lots of talk about food.

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Welcome to Queernecks, the podcast that

puts the Yee Hall in y'all means hall.

2

I'm your host, Beck, and I'm your host.

3

Dash.

4

Welcome to today's episode.

5

Beck: Well, Linda's been on her thing

where she doesn't want to eat, but the

6

last few days she has eaten really well.

7

She ate some pancakes this

morning, like that's unheard of.

8

Like she wanted a bite of

everything this morning.

9

Dash: Maybe she's not eating

dog food because she knows she

10

can get good shit out of you.

11

Beck: Her dog food is good shit.

12

It's like human grade.

13

Like the, the last one that we've

tried Um, they're warm bowls.

14

They're,

15

Dash: Hole, they're light

16

Beck: they're extra wet so that they

get the moisture so they get the liquid.

17

It smell, there's one of them had

broccoli in it and it smelled horrible.

18

Dash: It's so sometimes I'm,

I and I have not had dogs, so

19

I don't know what they eat.

20

And then finding out exactly how much

people food they eat is weird to me.

21

'cause cats

22

can't really,

23

Beck: I had a cat that Gilly,

if you'll remember Gilly.

24

He was a people food eater.

25

He loved everything,

26

Dash: yeah, they, they will eat it.

27

Mine will eat a lot of things,

but it doesn't do much for them.

28

Right.

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Their, little systems is not getting

a lot of nutrition outta 'em.

30

Since they're obligate carnivores,

I think they just want people

31

food because we haven't,

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Beck: Gilly didn't for a long time.

33

And then he tried popcorn

and was like, hell yeah.

34

And then he wanted a bite of everything.

35

He got some chicken and was

like, I am here for this.

36

Dash: that was Felix's gateway food

37

was popcorn.

38

Beck: Yeah.

39

Dash: Yeah.

40

I've had them for a long time.

41

Beck: GI and Ted were both

like 12 and 13 when They

42

passed.

43

Dash: That's how Old Oscar and

Felix are, they're 12 and 13,

44

Beck: Linda's the oldest at

14, though she's still spry.

45

This morning I was laying in bed.

46

She'll lay down at the foot of the bed

and just lay there and bark, every few

47

minutes if she wants something to drink

or if she's ready to get up or whatever.

48

Dash: you know?

49

Well today.

50

Beck: in the floor, right, because

she's too little to jump up there,

51

and she went and got her water.

52

And I keep a crate, a milk crate covered

by a rug at the bottom of the bed.

53

That's PETA's step to get up in the bed.

54

at, at our old apartment.

55

she was able, we had one of those by the

couch and she was Linda was able to get

56

up on the couch by herself, and I guess

she has remembered that she can do that.

57

And today she got herself up in the bed.

58

So she's still spray.

59

Dash: Yeah, I'm not sure.

60

I, I tried to,

61

I,

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I got them that fancy ass litter

box and I got real, extra and tried

63

to put some steps in front of it.

64

and they won't

65

reuse 'em.

66

Oscar's Like, no.

67

I would rather

68

struggle to drag my own ancient

ass up into this robot that

69

eats my shit than use the

70

stairs.

71

Thank you

72

Beck: that from their perspective?

73

Dash: Yeah.

74

I, it, it could go

75

either way.

76

It could either be like,

what are you doing?

77

Or it could be like,

yeah, this feels right.

78

You really, you should be cleaning up.

79

Beck: natural evolution of

the, the way things should be.

80

Dash: I remember seeing a cartoon one

time of a cat watching its owner scoop.

81

Its little turds out of

the litter box and it goes.

82

I've always wondered, what

do you want with those?

83

That's a fair question.

84

Look at this.

85

He's like, pawing at me.

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Beck: Your mink stole.

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Dash: This is what he wants just to

drape his fat ass over my shoulder.

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Beck: He is a stink mole

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Dash: Look at this.

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Beck: You really don't have

to be reduced to this man.

91

Dash: Right.

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You did this to yourself.

93

This is brisket.

94

He's one of the, I don't know, I think

all of them, all of mine are weird to me.

95

The most normal of them is Ziggy,

but maybe cats are just weird.

96

I mean, cats definitely have

97

personalities.

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Beck: percent.

99

How'd you get the name brisket?

100

Dash: Okay, so he's from a litter.

101

Sabrina's roommates had a cat

who has got outside and they kept

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one that they named gravy and.

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The, the rest of 'em, you know, people

took and brisket went to my sister,

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they tried to take him for a while.

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'cause they had lost their cat

who was elderly and the kids

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were pining for another animal.

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And then, so Vanessa was like, we'll try

this, but like, kittens are different,

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you know, like it, they just had to

learn, I guess through doing that.

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you don't simply replace a pet.

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Like there's a process to it.

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. And Vanessa was just like, I

don't have the bandwidth for this.

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This cat is peeing everywhere, hits needy.

113

so.

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I had my little menagerie down there

on in Kentucky, and so I just took him

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and threw him outside.

116

At the

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time, he only wanted to be outside,

and so I expected him to be

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eaten by something, to be honest.

119

But he, he, was out there with

a bigger cat named beef . He was

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my

121

mouser.

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So he lived outside.

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and he ate all the voles and the

snakes and, you know, all the things.

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And he kept, he kept it

nice and clean up out there.

125

And so

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he, I guess looked after brisket.

127

And

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so brisket grew up into adulthood,

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and then I had to move.

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so I was like, I can't leave him.

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I mean, that's just

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fucked up.

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People do that.

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I know they move off and leave

their, they leave their barn kits,

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they leave their mousers outside.

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So Vanessa took beef instead And so

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I just wound up with brisket,

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but I picked the name because originally

Sabrina and them, they were gonna name

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him biscuit to go along with gravy.

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And since he was hanging outside

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with beef, I start, I started calling

him brisket, and so now I'm stuck with

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this cat with the dumbest damn name.

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Beck: I like it.

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Dash: I, I appreciate it now.

145

But it's like, you don't just

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rename an animal.

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So,

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Because the others, I don't

put a ton of thought into naming

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my animals.

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I know that's weird, but Oscar,

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Beck: somebody

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Dash: found him out.

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I, I

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found they're

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all found animals basically.

156

So somebody found him outside down

157

in Richmond when he was a

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baby, and he had a little broken

leg and they couldn't get, you

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can't get anybody to take in

kittens in Richmond because there's

160

such bad feral colonies there.

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They just won't take kittens.

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Beck: so

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Dash: I took him in and they had

already named him Oscar, and I

164

don't know where they picked it.

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And so I just

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was reading a book, actually at the time.

167

I'm

168

called extremely loud and

incredibly close and the main

169

character's name in it was Oscar.

170

And so I just decided, okay, you're

named after this character now.

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And then Felix, we've found in a

friend's house and Felix just means cat.

172

And it also means lucky.

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a door fell on his head

uh, and he survived that.

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He's stupid, but, you know, he's fine.

175

also Oscar and Felix are the two

characters in the odd couple.

176

and Ziggy.

177

found in a friend's engine.

178

It was, I think the hottest day in

179

Kentucky of

180

Beck: 22

181

Dash: like 111 degrees,

I think in July and.

182

My friend had just got done

driving up from London, so her

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engine was hot and somebody had

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thrown, she clearly had

not been out there long.

185

somebody had thrown her out in the parking

lot in front of the Dollar General there

186

and she was so scared she climbed up in

that engine and it was a matter of time

187

before she was gonna die of, overheating.

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so she called me 'cause she knew

that I could get cats out of, I

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don't know why, but this is my only

superpower is being able to convince

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cats to do things that nobody else

would be able to get 'em to do.

191

So I got her out of the engine and

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she reminded me of a spider the way

she was trying to run away from me.

193

She was so overheated and, and you

know, not well, but she was still like

194

fighting like hell to get away from me.

195

And she was this little

dusty looking, she's gray.

196

She just reminded me of a spider.

197

So I called her Ziggy after

Ziggy Stardust and the spiders

198

from Mars.

199

Beck: right?

200

Dash: I didn't want her either.

201

Just

202

kind of got stuck with her.

203

Beck: I was with Pita.

204

I did not want pita at all.

205

And she has lived up to

that a hundred percent.

206

She is the grumpiest.

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One little dog.

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You And she's got it made in the shade.

209

She knows I'm talking about her.

210

Dash: she know

211

her name dos, know their names.

212

Beck: do.

213

Dash: Do they ever try to get

each other in trouble, like

214

frame each other for things?

215

Beck: probably has and I've not caught it.

216

Um, 'cause she's diabolical

217

in that way.

218

Dash: I don't know that any that they're

capable of, of that to that degree.

219

Although sometimes I just think

that that's what they're doing.

220

But Oscar is a manipulative bitch.

221

If Felix has something he wants, he

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knows this doesn't work as well anymore.

223

And they don't free feed anymore

because they've got the babies now.

224

But used to when they had food, whenever

they wanted it in their bowl if Felix had

225

a chair, a seat or a

blanket or something that

226

Oscar, wanted, Oscar would

227

go wherever the food was,

228

and scratch around in it.

229

So that Felix could hear

the sound of the food.

230

And then Felix would jump up

and think, oh, we're eating.

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Oh boy.

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And then Oscar while Felix was eating,

he would go and sneak into the chair.

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Beck: first time I

234

Dash: time I saw him do it, I was

like, is that what I just saw?

235

And then I saw him do it over and over

again and I was like, you evil bastard.

236

Beck: that's hilarious.

237

Skiing cats.

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Dash: Yeah,

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They also do that creepy thing

where they eat with their fingers.

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Only Oscar and Felix have done this.

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I haven't seen the two little ones do it.

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cats, you know, they get

whisker fatigue if you

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have the wrong kind of bowls and stuff.

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And I didn't know all that stuff.

245

I had, these are, Oscar and Felix

are the first indoor cats I've had.

246

And So I was just feeding 'em outta

247

straight up like Tupperware bowls

and it hurts their little whiskers

248

to push their face down in there.

249

And so they would, he would spread

his claws as wide as they would go,

250

flex it out and then stick his hand

down in the bowl and relax him and

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come up with a handful of kibble.

252

And there's videos of

cats doing it online too.

253

First time I saw it, oh, I was violently

high the first time I saw him do this.

254

And I was like, oh no,

they've got opposable thumbs.

255

I'm done for.

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Beck: It makes me think of my cousin.

257

She has a raccoon as a pet named

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Maggie.

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Dash: That's cool.

260

Beck: it's like a little butterball ham.

261

She said that it really is obsessed with

cigarettes and tampons, which makes me

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Dash: I think they, like, I've

seen a lot of raccoons carry

263

in straws and things like that.

264

They find, I think they like those long.

265

I think they're like tools to

266

them.

267

They use them for something

268

You can find all kinds of pictures,

videos of raccoons running

269

around with cigarettes and things

270

Beck: I sent it some, uh, dog

treats, some chicken jerky.

271

I really enjoyed

272

Dash: is, I mean, this, not

that this matters, but is there

273

restrictions on having those as pets?

274

Beck: had to have a license

to do it, and it's supposed to

275

stay in a cage, but it doesn't.

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Dash: Oh my God.

277

One time I had, so I said that Oscar

Felix were the first indoor cats

278

I've, I've had, it's not quite true.

279

I had a girlfriend that I lived with

for a while and we had a couple cats.

280

But one of them got out

and we never saw him again.

281

And then we broke up not long

after and she kept the other one.

282

But when that cat got out,

283

I

284

put some traps out to try

to catch him and bring him

285

back in.

286

I caught everything except cats.

287

I caught everything except him.

288

And one so one day I caught a possum.

289

This is the closest I've

ever been to an angry possum.

290

'cause you have to open

291

it up and let it back, like

whatever You caught out.

292

Oh man.

293

And this is like seven in the

294

morning before I was on my way to work.

295

It sucked.

296

' cause the possum, they

297

drool really bad.

298

Have You.

299

seen them?

300

Beck: Yeah.

301

They're disgusting.

302

Dash: Yeah, it's, and it like,

it, it, they open their mouth real

303

wide and they look at you at the

side of their, their eye and it's

304

a all the, all around unsettling

305

Beck: They scream too.

306

They

307

scream

308

Dash: Yeah.

309

And it, yeah, it was breathing

with its mouth like wide open.

310

I think they're trying to unsettle you.

311

I don't think they have many

actual, I mean they can be dangerous

312

to smaller animals, but clearly

they are easily threatened.

313

'cause the whole play possum thing, I,

314

Brisket has got to be

in my lap all the time.

315

I don't know what he is gonna do

when I have to go back to work.

316

Beck: I like his little mustache,

317

Dash: Yeah.

318

Beck: Ty?

319

Dash: He's got green

eyes his brother gravy.

320

Looks just like Siamese.

321

Well, probably is, I guess.

322

I don't know if you can look like some

and not be, so he is got bright blue eyes.

323

Beck: You you know how you're like, what

celebrity do I look like or whatever.

324

Those quizzes.

325

I always get an Asian person,

326

Dash: What, why?

327

Beck: my eyes.

328

Yeah.

329

Apparently I look Asian

to those computer models.

330

Dash: Well, I think that There's

not a, a, a big understanding that

331

other races can have mono lidd eyes.

332

So like that's the predominant

feature I think that most people

333

are familiar with of Asian and

ethnicities is that monoliths.

334

But I have monoliths because I'm

from Geico and that's half of the

335

phenotype of Geico is that So maybe

that's why I've never done one though.

336

God, it sounds really offensive,

337

Beck: So how's your week been

338

Dash: man I'm stressed out

339

' I'm stressed about tomorrow.

340

Beck: What's tomorrow?

341

Dash: It's my defense.

342

Beck: I didn't know

343

Dash: Yeah.

344

Beck: how you, how you,

345

feeling, man?

346

Dash: I've been, working on a

presentation that I have started over five

347

times probably.

348

I don't know.

349

I don't know why I do that.

350

I, well, I, I know now That it's

just a, it, it can, it for me is a, a

351

disordered part of, of having OCD, but

352

if it didn't look exactly

right, I would delete the whole

353

thing and start over again.

354

And I, I do that so often

with, with all kinds of things.

355

So I did that a bunch of times yesterday.

356

Today I've gotten several slides in and

I'm, I'm not doing it, I'm not giving up

357

again, so I'm just gonna make a few more,

starting to get real anxious about it.

358

Beck: but you've got this.

359

I mean, there's no worry.

360

Dash: No, there's no, there's no worry.

361

There's, you know, everybody who's gonna

be on the call is, is a cheerleader

362

and is invested in supporting

students and wanting them, you know,

363

me to be successful.

364

I just

365

want to feel like I have

done the best I can.

366

when it's done.

367

And um, maybe I'm just not being

the best friend to myself mentally.

368

trying to imagine how

something's gonna feel,

369

that's more than a waste of time

370

and energy.

371

That, that's actually,

372

I mean, what happens when you're wrong?

373

Are you disappointed then that you were

wronged about how it was gonna feel?

374

I mean, you're just setting yourself up

for more things to be bummed out about.

375

Beck: You got this?

376

What time is it?

377

Dash: it's 8:30 AM for

me, so nine 30 for you.

378

Beck: Well, that's what time I start

teaching a class tomorrow, so I'll

379

have positive thoughts going your way

380

Dash: It'll be fun to

talk about the material.

381

That is the thing I miss the most

about not being in um, I'm in

382

higher ed, but I don't talk with

people who are doing research.

383

I don't hang out with people

who are doing the kind of stuff

384

that I really geek out about.

385

And that's what I miss the most

about being in that like more

386

academic side of higher education.

387

I didn't know how bad it was until

I started working on it again,

388

until I, you know, got re-enrolled

and started writing dissertation.

389

I was like, God dammit, I really

390

miss This Like, this is what I wanted when

391

out of grad school.

392

That's what I wanted to do.

393

Beck: I've looked at my proposal

approximately 8,000 times in the last

394

week, and I, I'm just so overwhelmed

by it that this weekend I'm gonna

395

conquer it.

396

Dash: somebody commented

something on YouTube

397

that I thought was a really good question.

398

Let me pull, pull it up here.

399

Sometimes our YouTube comments are

delayed listeners, so if you put

400

something on there and it, like,

we don't mention it for weeks.

401

Beck: It's

402

Dash: because I had to

403

go digging for it.

404

'cause it'll say there's

a comment, but it's not

405

readable.

406

So I have to go through back the back way

407

or the front way, I

408

guess, to our actual YouTube channel

409

Beck: Okay.

410

Dash: Yes.

411

So someone named Techno Pop-Tart

asked, do we remember what

412

was the first thing we

ever consciously chose

413

to wear that we knew was

414

a queer signifier?

415

Like that we

416

chose a piece of an

outfit or a clothing item

417

knowing that it was a

part of queer culture.

418

Beck: first big signifier would've

been my hair getting it cut short.

419

Dash: I think for

420

a lot of people who are assigned,

female at birth who are queer or

421

want to present a different gender

than traditional femininity.

422

It's the hair, the hair's a big one.

423

Beck: I've had hair, short

hair most of my life.

424

when I was younger.

425

Mom cut it off.

426

'cause I, once, when I was really

little, when I was like five, I had

427

hair all the way down to my butt.

428

But person I would let brush

my hair was my adopted father.

429

I became a real pain about it

So mom, just cut it all off

430

Dash: Did that like, was that upsetting?

431

Beck: I liked it short, but then she got

432

Dash: No.

433

Oh,

434

Beck: and I looked like a little

Michael Jackson at one point.

435

Dash: my mom

436

used to crimp my hair.

437

Beck: Have you ever seen the photo?

438

You've probably seen the photo

that I made it on Awkward Family

439

Photos for, right?

440

Dash: Oh yeah.

441

This is so, We'll get back on, on topic,

but I wanna put a pin in this because I

442

want, this is something I've been meaning

443

to have you bring up

on the show, but you've

444

got a couple of

445

bylines on some really famous

446

internet photos.

447

You, so you have

448

made it to the front page

of Awkward Family Photos

449

and you also

450

snapped a very famous photo.

451

You know the one I'm talking about?

452

Beck: photo,

453

Dash: Yeah.

454

Beck: my dubious claim to fame.

455

so I was a professional photographer

at the time and so I had a really

456

nice camera in the car with me.

457

I had to work the next day and I

was driving through Huntington, West

458

Virginia, and I look over and this

Burger King sign says, try our new anus

459

Burger And I cracked up laughing, right?

460

So I pull over and I get outta the car

and I take a picture of it and I posted

461

it and it kind of just went everywhere.

462

All at once.

463

Dash: This was Als, this was back

in the, the two thousands too.

464

Right.

465

So this had to make the rounds

on cheeseburger and on Reddit.

466

And I'm sure it wound up on

the four chan boards too.

467

I mean, it was everywhere.

468

It was in every listicle about like

typography or bad English and stuff,

469

because I don't remember why, but I

brought that picture up at one point back

470

when we, early on when we first met.

471

and you said you took it.

472

Beck: I can, I, I have the

original copy of it somewhere.

473

when we were moving, I found approximately

5 million DVD Or CDs with images on 'em.

474

I've got probably 300

CDs full of pictures.

475

It was on my MySpace page.

476

That's how old it is.

477

Dash: We gotta make something with that.

478

We gotta, we gotta make some sort of

Queernecks thing with, Tryer Anus Burger.

479

So I always dressed.

480

I wanted to, to dress like a boy.

481

And since all of our clothes came from the

yard sales or Salvation Army or something

482

those formative years, like when you first

have to start school and stuff, like,

483

that's where all our clothes came from.

484

It was pretty easy for me to

actually, for me to access

485

the

486

blue jeans and t-shirts and

487

ball caps that I wanted to wear.

488

They were not cool

489

clothes.

490

They were always 10, 20

491

years outta style or something.

492

But I just, I never felt

comfortable unless I was dressed in

493

what the boys got to wear.

494

Now, maybe that's not as big of a thing

495

unless you're going to some

496

sort of, you know, crazy uh,

private school or something.

497

But I think

498

now it's pretty normal for

girls to wear blue jeans and

499

t-shirts and stuff like that.

500

Beck: we were

501

much closer to the era of when women

were, had to be forced, like were

502

forced to wear skirts all the time.

503

Like sometimes I forget that

my mom was raised that way,

504

especially because she was

505

Pentecostal and my grandmother

506

Dash: God,

507

Beck: pants,

508

Dash: I don't know about my granny.

509

I mean, my grandmother wears OTs.

510

But I know that my mom and her sisters,

511

like they were hippies, So they wore

like the bell bottoms and mom like

512

embroidered the pockets herself.

513

And they wore, football jerseys as shirts

but they were real like counterculture.

514

My mom and her sisters

were cool kids, right?

515

Like they were the bad

bitches of the high school.

516

That was not my, that wasn't

the life I was living.

517

Beck: So I

518

Dash: I think I kind of always

dressed queer as soon as I had

519

any power but I didn't

understand it as queer though.

520

I under, I just knew that I felt

dreadful in anything that was feminine.

521

Beck: Me too.

522

Dash: it's hard to separate out when

I knew that that's what I was doing.

523

Beck: The feminine stuff

524

really gets to me too.

525

I, I've never felt comfortable

in overtly feminine things.

526

It was not as bad when I was like

15, 16, and I was going to prom,

527

Dash: 16,

528

Beck: felt

529

awkward or whatever,

530

Dash: felt

531

awkward

532

or whatever, but like, since I graduated

533

Beck: two times.

534

Once for a wedding, once for a funeral.

535

Dash: yeah.

536

the last dress I wore was

537

That was a bridesmaid.

538

Beck: Because

539

Dash: But I remember her telling

me, she was like, you can

540

wear a suit.

541

I don't care.

542

And I know

543

that

544

she was telling the truth, but

545

the fight

546

that that would've

caused with mom and maybe

547

even dad, I don't

548

know, some, it was a hit or miss whether

he would chime in on something like this.

549

And we had just

550

gone through, she got

married soon after David

551

died I didn't wear a dress,

and things like that.

552

when we had to be

553

seen for his stuff I was wearing button

down shirts and slacks and things and the

554

news

555

They, there was so much

556

news being written about us and

557

stuff like that.

558

They were misgendering me.

559

They were reporting that I was

560

his brother and that was

really upsetting to my dad.

561

I don't know how my mom felt

about it, but it was one of

562

the few times my dad actually like,

did go out of his way to make me feel

563

bad about not doing gender correctly.

564

And I think it was just because

we were so prominent at the time,

565

Beck: Makes sense.

566

Dash: so I didn't, I did not want to

go, I didn't wanna go through that

567

again, so I was just

568

like, it, it really

doesn't cost me anything.

569

Like, yeah, I wouldn't wanna dress

up like this and go places where I,

570

could be the of attention.

571

But this is your, your wedding.

572

So

573

to me, this is just like This

is like cosplaying something.

574

Beck: I was only, I think like 11 or

12 when my sister got married the first

575

time and had her big wedding and she

put me in a Pepto Bismol pink dress

576

with a giant bow on it with pink shoes.

577

Oh, I hated it.

578

I rem I remember my cousin doing my

hair and I was mad about it 'cause I

579

had to wear that stupid ass dress Bismol

580

Dash: looked pretty.

581

pretty fierce actually for

Vanessa's wedding because um,

582

somebody else picked out the

dress, somebody else did my hair,

583

somebody else did my makeup,

and I was like, this is fine.

584

Honestly.

585

I mean, I don't, I know that it's just

for today and everybody else is taking

586

like the agency over its execution, so

I'm just the canvas for whatever this is.

587

I didn't learn about queer culture

until, I probably learned about The

588

fact that it was a whole ass culture

that had its own like language

589

and, and signifiers in there, in bg.

590

I was in my, probably

in my early thirties.

591

Beck: Oh, wow.

592

Dash: It just wasn't something that

593

Beck: had

594

Dash: access to in Angelico.

595

And then where I went to school,

596

I didn't hang out with queer

597

kids because there wasn't many of them

598

that could be out at the time.

599

I mean, We were still having

to call the police information

600

desk to find out the location

of the gay group meeting.

601

' it's not that we weren't allowed

to, but like people were still

602

like, they would um, I don't know what

603

they were filling 'em with, but

they would fill up condoms with

604

stuff and throw them at us.

605

And like, It was just easier if

606

we met, met in secret.

607

And So it was so much trouble.

608

And once everybody once we got there,

all anybody wanted to do was hook up.

609

So I just quit going

610

and then just never understood

queerness as a cultural

611

component for the longest time.

612

Beck: Didn't

613

Dash: even know about the

614

Beck: Oh, wow.

615

I started sporting rainbows very early in

my weirdo, you know, somebody explained

616

it to me once that, um, straight

people, they go through a thing when

617

they're, you know, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15.

618

They get to experiment with

crushes and dating and who they

619

and figuring things out like that.

620

And when you're queer, you don't

get that same kind of education

621

because you don't get to explore it.

622

most most queer people don't.

623

So when you do come out, it's

like you, you rush just have

624

some of those experiences.

625

And I think that's why some people go

overboard with the rainbows, number one.

626

Um, and number two, why they go

through so many relationships so

627

quickly when they first come out.

628

Um, because you're doing that whole

thing from, you know, in eighth grade

629

you had a different boyfriend every week.

630

that

631

was totally normal.

632

you just

633

Dash: Yeah.

634

Beck: same kind of, that thing

when you're, when you're older.

635

Dash: It is.

636

Yeah.

637

And it hits different too, as an adult.

638

It's, I mean, and, if you were

to put something like medical

639

transitioning in there, like my

640

God was that awkward,

641

just think about being an 11-year-old boy

642

Beck: and

643

Dash: all of the things that happened

to them and their appearance and their

644

body and their understanding, their

645

relationship to those things or whatever.

646

They go through that.

647

In fifth grade, I was 35 and in meetings

with the president of the university

648

and like I had some important

649

visible ass job

650

and

651

still experiencing literal.

652

puberty and it was just awful

and funny at the same time.

653

I knew about, I went to gay bars

654

and stuff

655

when I was in high school and

college, and I just never put it

656

together that there was a

whole culture happening there.

657

'Cause I, I just experienced it so

infrequently and immersively and when

658

I was there, I was just trying to

659

interact with as many people as possible,

660

you know, where I

661

learned a lot of queer

culture from RuPaul's Drag

662

Race.

663

Beck: See, I just, ugh.

664

I know people love that shit

and they like queer eye and all

665

that.

666

It is

667

too gay for me,

668

Dash: I, I don't love it.

669

I can't

670

watch it anymore, but

671

that's

672

where I learned

673

like what

674

the language was.

675

If somebody tried to use

676

queer slang with me, I

didn't understand it.

677

I didn't know what reading was.

678

I didn't know what

679

Shade

680

was

681

Somebody, I was in my,

682

I was pro.

683

I had already moved up to bg, so I was in

684

my thirties.

685

The first time

686

somebody said throwing shade to me I

didn't know what the fuck it meant.

687

So I literally knew nothing.

688

so I'm like, I'm like watching

RuPaul's Drag Race, like

689

it's a goddamn documentary.

690

I'm like taking notes, okay

what does this one mean?

691

And then I found the places that they

were drawing their references from, right?

692

Like, Paris is Burning, or the Queen,

or Priscilla Queen of the Desert.

693

I just had been super

sheltered from all things and

694

queerness fell into that gigantic bucket.

695

And so I had to then go on a, this mission

to educate myself about things via media.

696

'cause I couldn't have the experiences.

697

It was too late to go back for those.

698

Beck: I don't like things that have

a lot of masculine energy, like it's

699

just not for me Just too much for me.

700

It really is.

701

Uh, my wife has a friend

who is, bless his heart, he.

702

He plays with gender a

lot, but not in a fun way.

703

if that makes any sense.

704

Like,

705

Dash: Like

706

Beck: need to calm down.

707

Dash: the most, I don't know if it's the

most recent season, but um, there's a

708

Kentucky Queen on RuPaul's Drag Race.

709

named Lexi Love which is pretty

710

cool.

711

The drag scene

712

in Kentucky is actually pretty

713

lit.

714

Once I found out about it.

715

It was too late, like I learned about

drag and like the importance of drag

716

and stuff like that after I had moved

somewhere where it didn't exist.

717

So a lot of my exposure or,

learning and interaction with

718

drag, has been through tv.

719

Beck: Yeah, a lot of mine.

720

Too

721

I think that I had some bad

experiences with gay men and they were

722

Dash: Mm-hmm.

723

Beck: and I think it just, I don't

know, left a mark on me or something.

724

It just isn't as genuine as

I used to feel like it was.

725

So there are some people that

it's very genuine to, right?

726

I have a friend named Stewart.

727

I, God love him.

728

he is one of the gayest people

I've ever met in my life.

729

But he likes seeing show tunes at a, at

a piano bar on Sundays but people that

730

are just over the top for no reason or

that or that they're really flamboyant.

731

I just, I can't handle it.

732

It is too much for me.

733

That makes me a bad gay probably, but

734

Dash: if for a community like ours

whose formative years are so like

735

just awash in shame and stigma.

736

we don't have a lot of control

737

over what our responses are to, to

certain things or to each other.

738

Beck: I think me at a porn shop added

to that, was a lot of shame around that.

739

Dash: around sex in general

740

or around queerness.

741

Beck: around sex in general and queerness,

we just didn't talk about that was taboo.

742

The only queer stuff I

743

Dash: The only

744

weird,

745

Beck: before I started going

to the gay bar was on tv.

746

Like I didn't have any role models.

747

I didn't know anybody that was out.

748

I didn't have any gay

friends, anything like that.

749

I started from scratch, from zero from,

750

Dash: it was an out gay

guy in my high school.

751

think he was out.

752

I don't know.

753

But he seemed also he was

very effeminate and everyone

754

just sort of, I think, assumed

755

he was gay.

756

And I don't know if he

757

felt like arguing with them about

it, but he is, he was, he did, he did

758

eventually come out as gay and he was

a cheerleader and you know, he was like

759

that big personality, kind of, like loud

760

life of the party type of stereotype

761

Beck: but

762

Dash: since he was the only

gay person I ever knew.

763

I just thought that was just him.

764

I didn't meet a lot of

gay people at college.

765

The only time, I saw

766

other gay people was at the

bars and people are behaving.

767

You behave

768

a certain way at the bar.

769

Beck: do.

770

I smoked a lot of weed at the bar

' cause I've never been a drinker.

771

Dash: never been a, drinker.

772

Beck: was a, an apartment

773

Dash: there was a, an apartment

774

Beck: but there was an

apartment above the Stonewall.

775

Somebody and sometimes the drag

queens lived up there And so the,

776

door to that apartment was right next

to the entrance to the stonewall.

777

And people would go in that it had a

closed door so you could like sit in that

778

stairway and just sit there and smoke pot.

779

Dash: Yeah, I was, I was a drinker.

780

but,

781

you know,

782

going up to the bars, I

783

mean, you had to drive so far,

784

We just, honestly, once I got to college,

we honestly did not go to the gay

785

bar that much.

786

We just Went down to the straight bars

787

and tried not to think about being queer.

788

The

789

bar that we went to most often literally

had signs hanging up that said.

790

Only opposite sex dance pairings,

791

it was called the Family Dog

there in Richmond, Kentucky.

792

It was the bar that everybody went to.

793

I

794

got threw out of a bar there

for dancing with a Girl.

795

Beck: But yeah,

796

Dash: but yeah, like I would get,

I would just get slightly tore up

797

and forget that everybody else was

798

all in a bunch about

799

queerness,

800

and just act like I felt like acting

and then get myself into trouble.

801

Beck: When I moved to Lexington, I

moved in with my gay, my gay husband

802

at the time, and I went to work at

Meyer that won right on Man of War,

803

that Big Meyer, and I was a cashier

and I remember sitting outside one

804

day and I was smoking a cigarette

805

and

806

Dash: cigarette,

807

Beck: were out there and they

were smoking and I, they like.

808

Mentioned that they were

roommates or whatever, and I

809

was like, are y'all family?

810

And one girl was like,

no, we're not related.

811

And the other one was like,

that's not what she's asking,

812

Dash: they were

813

Beck: They ended up being really cool.

814

Um, well, the, the one girl

was a definite alcoholic.

815

so several

816

Dash: so, several bad things

817

happened to in,

818

Beck: and I kind of just

819

gave up and

820

Dash: I kind of just

821

gave up and moved back to

Huntington And when I was in

822

the process of, of giving up,

823

Beck: me live in their living room.

824

So I always appreciated

825

Dash: So I always appreciate

826

Beck: to go.

827

but no, I could never have survived

living on somebody's couch.

828

I moved home with my best friend

829

Dash: Home with my best friend

830

and I lived there for several years.

831

Beck: So I loved living

with my best friend and her

832

son.

833

Dash: My best

834

Beck: It was the closest I had to having a

835

Dash: I had

836

Beck: It was fun.

837

Dash: I moved back home

a couple of summers.

838

I lived back at my parents' house.

839

It was actually, it might've only

been two summers that I lived there.

840

And once was when I was getting ready

841

to go back.

842

up to school at EKU, I had come

back from where I was living in

843

my car out in western Kentucky.

844

I really did not like

living with them too much

845

Beck: Yeah, it was real awkward

846

after I came out.

847

Dash: It's also

848

just like it was So.

849

what to in, in my, you know, at the

time I was like, gosh, it's so small.

850

There's

851

nothing to do here.

852

now, I live somewhere where

there's literally nothing to do.

853

Beck: be,

854

Dash: I was doing the math

today on population density and

855

stuff like that because I was like, this

is rural, but it's the kind of rural

856

that, is not like the kind of rural I'm

857

used to.

858

So for instance, Kentucky

859

has twice the population density of

860

Minnesota It's half the size with

861

close to the same population.

862

But

863

it actually gets worse than that.

864

65% of Minnesota's population is

865

in the Twin Cities.

866

Kentucky is not like that.

867

Right.

868

It's like a

869

little over a million

870

people live in the metro

871

areas in Kentucky.

872

The rest of it is.

873

Jam packed with people in hollers cause

874

I when I got out here I was like, what

is something's, there's a factor I

875

did not take into account about this.

876

It is empty as hell.

877

Beck: Now

878

I

879

Dash: I understand why

people say land doesn't vote.

880

I do, I think some of the first like,

881

signifiers for

882

me, it wasn't it wasn't as much about like

883

'cause I was

884

already, you know, a gender

885

diverse person, but

886

trying to

887

create a style of my own having, being

888

able to go to the, the Salvation Army

by myself, you know, as an adult and

889

get whatever clothes I wanted, that was

a novel experience for me in college.

890

Beyond just signifying queerness.

891

I was trying to create

an aesthetic, right?

892

I was trying to, to

893

catch girls with, with how I looked.

894

And I went through a lot of eras.

895

Some of them were real bad,

but I had some hat eras.

896

I went through this phase and I still do

this sometimes because it's, it feels more

897

natural to me than the other way

of tying my flannel shirt around

898

my waist, but backwards so it

hangs in the front like a kilt.

899

And, um, the Velcro shoes from Walmart

newsboy hats, a lot of A shirts

900

Those, those.

901

undershirts.

902

Beck: love those.

903

It's

904

my like my favorite thing

to wear around the house.

905

Dash: Maybe let's uh,

hear from today's sponsor.

906

You see what's

907

happening over here?

908

Beck: I do.

909

Dash: All right.

910

This week's episode of Queernecks

is sponsored by Guy who takes his

911

guitar everywhere just in case.

912

Are you tired of Silence of Quiet

Moments that could have been

913

filled with an acoustic cover

of Take Me Home Country Roads.

914

Then you need this guy.

915

He'll show up to a bonfire, a

cookout, a memorial service.

916

It doesn't matter.

917

Before the casserole hits the

table, he's already tuned up.

918

He doesn't plan to play, but

he brought it just in case.

919

In case of what Travis, in case Tyler

Childers calls, in case the spirit moves

920

you mid potluck in case the world ends.

921

And we all need an acoustic cover

of Wonder Wall to get through it.

922

And we may give him grief,

but deep down we need him.

923

He's the first to start wagon wheel

when the Bluetooth gives up, he's

924

the one strumming softly in the

background while the night cools

925

down and the lightning bugs come out.

926

He'll play three chords, look off

into the distance and whisper.

927

It's not about being good, it's about

feeling something like poor penny s

928

laterally says, I didn't even know him.

929

He just showed up at the picnic,

played wonderwall, and somehow

930

my depression cleared up for like

two minutes before coming back.

931

Worse.

932

Old Cyrus McGee says he

brought it to jury duty.

933

He didn't even get picked, but

he stayed and played a song

934

about justice in the parking lot.

935

Joshua Smalley says, he taught me three

chords and told me feelings count as

936

lyrics, and I ain't been the same since.

937

So here's to him, the guy who never

risks an empty moment, likely out

938

of some undiagnosed social anxiety.

939

He's right behind me, isn't he?

940

Dear Abby, dear Ab, my feet are too long.

941

My hair's falling out.

942

My rights are wrong.

943

Wrong.

944

My friends tell me.

945

I no friends at all.

946

Won't you a letter, won't you

947

be?

948

Bewildered, bewildered.

949

You have no complaints.

950

You are what you're, and

you ain't what you ain.

951

So listen up, Buster, and listen up.

952

Good.

953

Stop.

954

Wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood.

955

Dear Abby, dear Abby, my fountain, my wife

follows Abby, and my kids are all freaks.

956

Every side I get up on is the wrong bed.

957

If it weren't so wish I.

958

Sign.

959

Unhappy.

960

Unhappy.

961

Unhappy.

962

You have no complaints.

963

You are what you are, and

you ain't what you ain't.

964

So listen up, Buster and listen.

965

Dear Abby, dear Abby,

you won't believe this.

966

My stomach makes noises.

967

Whenever I kiss, my girlfriend

tells me it's all in my.

968

Noisemaker,

969

noisemaker, noisemaker.

970

You have no complaints.

971

You are what you are

and you ain't, you ain.

972

So listen up.

973

I never thought that me and my

girlfriend would ever get called.

974

We were sitting in the back seat,

just the breeze with her hair up

975

and curlers and her to her knees.

976

Just married, just married.

977

You have no complaints.

978

You're what?

979

You're and ain't what?

980

Beck: That was awesome.

981

I

982

loved it.

983

That was

984

really fun.

985

Dash: That's the first song I

ever heard by John Prine and I

986

learned that music could be sweet

and earnest, but also ridiculous.

987

It's A lot of his music

strikes me as being queer.

988

Actually, it's super camp.

989

I was guitar guy.

990

I was,

991

egregious.

992

I brought it everywhere.

993

I slept on it.

994

Sometimes, like I

995

would take it.

996

to a party with me and

997

be like

998

Beck: just in case.

999

Dash: Yep.

00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:11,382

Beck: That's hilarious.

00:39:11,492 --> 00:39:13,427

I've never been a guitar guy myself.

00:39:13,427 --> 00:39:14,716

I don't know how to play any instruments.

00:39:15,216 --> 00:39:18,186

Dash: I used to be like actually

kind of good and I don't

00:39:18,186 --> 00:39:19,836

actually don't practice anymore.

00:39:20,071 --> 00:39:23,121

You don't need to be super good to be

able to like hammer out a John Prine song,

00:39:23,121 --> 00:39:24,651

though listeners, anybody

00:39:24,702 --> 00:39:24,822

Beck: that.

00:39:24,926 --> 00:39:25,046

Dash: that.

00:39:26,427 --> 00:39:28,287

Beck: I very much enjoyed

that, so thank you.

00:39:28,873 --> 00:39:30,433

Dash: He's got a Christmas song,

00:39:30,678 --> 00:39:35,266

Called Christmas in Prison that I

was thinking of doing as like a what

00:39:35,266 --> 00:39:36,886

you call it, a bonus or something.

00:39:37,025 --> 00:39:39,958

We could write some, some queer necks

lyrics though and put 'em in there.

00:39:40,279 --> 00:39:41,009

Beck: that would be fun.

00:39:41,661 --> 00:39:44,421

Let's do this week's noun

of Appalachian interest.

00:39:49,761 --> 00:39:50,151

All right.

00:39:50,151 --> 00:39:50,961

This week's down

00:39:51,031 --> 00:39:51,121

Dash: all

00:39:51,591 --> 00:39:54,501

Beck: interest is one of my

personal favorites around

00:39:54,501 --> 00:39:55,851

here in Queernecks Country.

00:39:55,851 --> 00:39:59,751

Giovanni's isn't just a pizza joint,

it's an Appalachian lifestyle choice

00:39:59,931 --> 00:40:03,891

with medical side effects, like

two nap afternoons, the sign says

00:40:03,891 --> 00:40:06,111

Giovanni's Pizza Power and they mean it.

00:40:06,381 --> 00:40:09,471

This is pizza with swagger, the kind

that looks you dead in the eye and says,

00:40:09,471 --> 00:40:13,161

yes, you're eating half now, and the

00:40:13,161 --> 00:40:15,201

the fridge like a raccoon with insomnia.

00:40:15,771 --> 00:40:17,301

Born in Wheelers, Burg, Ohio.

00:40:17,301 --> 00:40:21,891

little shop to a hundred plus across

00:40:21,891 --> 00:40:25,131

six states, which is exactly how

long it takes word to travel up the

00:40:25,131 --> 00:40:27,261

ridge and back as the crust snaps.

00:40:27,261 --> 00:40:31,191

The cheese stretches, but the sauce

is the star, rich, tangy, and a

00:40:31,191 --> 00:40:32,871

little sweet, like a wink from across

00:40:32,946 --> 00:40:34,246

Dash: like a from the

00:40:34,540 --> 00:40:36,760

Beck: Folks have been known

to drive hours for it.

00:40:36,970 --> 00:40:38,380

The cravings are real.

00:40:38,740 --> 00:40:39,790

Personal testimony.

00:40:39,790 --> 00:40:40,960

The baked spaghetti is

00:40:41,044 --> 00:40:42,904

Dash: bake spaghetti is powerful enough.

00:40:42,994 --> 00:40:43,234

Jerk.

00:40:43,570 --> 00:40:44,200

Beck: picnics.

00:40:44,530 --> 00:40:45,580

I have eaten my own body

00:40:45,754 --> 00:40:46,714

Dash: I have eaten my own body.

00:40:46,780 --> 00:40:47,410

Beck: tell myself.

00:40:47,410 --> 00:40:48,340

Save some for later

00:40:48,394 --> 00:40:48,784

Dash: Don't say

00:40:48,784 --> 00:40:48,844

so.

00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:50,620

Beck: means before the car is in park.

00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:51,400

It's fine.

00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:53,020

That's why napkins come in stacks.

00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:53,830

True story.

00:40:53,830 --> 00:40:55,000

When my mom was pregnant with me

00:40:55,079 --> 00:40:56,074

Dash: My mom was pregnant,

00:40:56,140 --> 00:40:57,190

Beck: the Italian sausage from

00:40:57,190 --> 00:40:59,170

Giovanni's, and I'm pretty sure it left an

00:40:59,344 --> 00:41:00,214

Dash: and I'm pretty sure it let

00:41:00,214 --> 00:41:00,904

the indel was.

00:41:01,015 --> 00:41:02,515

Beck: Every town with the Giovannis has

00:41:02,515 --> 00:41:03,265

its rituals,

00:41:03,454 --> 00:41:03,664

Dash: has

00:41:03,865 --> 00:41:06,865

Beck: victory feasts, birthday

parties where the candles melt faster

00:41:06,919 --> 00:41:07,139

Dash: the

00:41:07,915 --> 00:41:10,975

Beck: Teenagers splitting cheese

sticks on a date, and that uncle who

00:41:10,975 --> 00:41:14,365

swears he could make the same sauce

if he felt like it, he could not.

00:41:14,365 --> 00:41:15,865

He will not, and we all know it.

00:41:15,929 --> 00:41:16,149

Dash: not

00:41:16,345 --> 00:41:17,815

Beck: The best part they deliver to the

00:41:18,099 --> 00:41:18,383

Dash: thank

00:41:18,389 --> 00:41:21,479

Beck: If your address is left at

the second mailbox nailed to a

00:41:21,699 --> 00:41:22,179

Dash: mailbox

00:41:22,259 --> 00:41:24,449

Beck: then pass the goat

that judges, they'll still

00:41:24,579 --> 00:41:24,849

Dash: Judge.

00:41:25,499 --> 00:41:28,559

Beck: The driver's got four wheel

drive, a proper map older than your

00:41:28,559 --> 00:41:32,489

truck, and the kind of courage you

only get from carrying a pepperoni pie.

00:41:33,539 --> 00:41:37,379

pizza power isn't just a chain, it's

a red sauce gravitational field,

00:41:37,409 --> 00:41:40,769

and these hills power means that

you're, planning leftovers and still

00:41:40,769 --> 00:41:43,049

somehow opening the box just to look.

00:41:43,349 --> 00:41:45,899

Congratulations, you're coming

back for seconds, thirds, an

00:41:45,899 --> 00:41:47,399

apology to your future self.

00:41:47,933 --> 00:41:50,783

I'll never stop hoping they

open a franchise, Toledo, Ohio.

00:41:51,175 --> 00:41:51,475

Dash: Yes.

00:41:51,475 --> 00:41:53,875

There was a, there was a

Giovanni's in Richmond.

00:41:53,875 --> 00:41:54,625

still is.

00:41:54,964 --> 00:41:56,644

And I didn't know.

00:41:56,644 --> 00:41:58,024

I wasn't, I'd never heard of it

00:41:58,024 --> 00:41:58,654

I didn't know.

00:41:58,654 --> 00:41:58,834

And

00:41:58,834 --> 00:42:00,724

so when I got up there.

00:42:00,724 --> 00:42:01,474

and got introduced to

00:42:01,474 --> 00:42:02,704

Giovanni's, I was like, my

00:42:02,704 --> 00:42:03,724

world's different now.

00:42:03,894 --> 00:42:04,974

Beck: it is so good.

00:42:05,231 --> 00:42:05,381

Dash: I've

00:42:05,381 --> 00:42:06,011

changed.

00:42:06,151 --> 00:42:09,211

Beck: My mom literally craved the,

they would sell her little cups of the

00:42:09,211 --> 00:42:11,251

sausage when she was pregnant with me.

00:42:11,251 --> 00:42:13,261

And I, I really think

it left a mark on me.

00:42:13,452 --> 00:42:13,932

Dash: Yeah.

00:42:14,898 --> 00:42:15,948

Well, I, I, I don't

00:42:15,948 --> 00:42:17,958

know, you know, if there's

science or whatever.

00:42:17,958 --> 00:42:18,858

on that, but my

00:42:18,858 --> 00:42:21,108

mom craved pickles and I

definitely love pickles.

00:42:21,511 --> 00:42:22,351

Beck: Giovanni's fiend.

00:42:22,351 --> 00:42:26,821

I posted, I posted yesterday on

Facebook that it had been 365 days

00:42:26,821 --> 00:42:28,561

since the last time I had Giovanni's.

00:42:28,561 --> 00:42:28,681

Dash: I

00:42:28,776 --> 00:42:29,466

saw that.

00:42:29,621 --> 00:42:30,431

Beck: I keep trek.

00:42:30,821 --> 00:42:31,931

I, it's so good.

00:42:31,931 --> 00:42:33,491

Their pizza is just delicious.

00:42:33,491 --> 00:42:34,901

The sauce is amazing.

00:42:35,386 --> 00:42:35,626

Dash: Yeah.

00:42:35,626 --> 00:42:36,466

The sauce is good.

00:42:36,466 --> 00:42:39,616

They have the perfect ratio, you

know, like the, the thickness of the

00:42:39,616 --> 00:42:41,656

crust and like, They don't oversaw

00:42:41,656 --> 00:42:42,406

it on unders sauce.

00:42:42,406 --> 00:42:44,536

They're, it's not like

way too much cheese.

00:42:45,046 --> 00:42:47,956

And then those big, like

plate sized pepperonis.

00:42:48,667 --> 00:42:48,967

Beck: yep.

00:42:49,165 --> 00:42:49,825

They're so good.

00:42:49,825 --> 00:42:50,845

I love Giovanni's.

00:42:51,085 --> 00:42:53,575

Their baked spaghetti is

a home run all the time.

00:42:53,785 --> 00:42:55,165

Their cheese sticks are always good.

00:42:55,165 --> 00:42:56,125

Their pizza bread is good.

00:42:56,125 --> 00:42:59,035

My parents always like their

Italian sandwiches, like everything

00:42:59,035 --> 00:43:00,265

on the menu is just good.

00:43:00,655 --> 00:43:05,605

Five stars would recommend and they won't

deliver to Toledo because I have asked,

00:43:05,807 --> 00:43:06,947

Dash: What's it gonna cost?

00:43:07,877 --> 00:43:09,617

I'll save up every month and you can

00:43:09,617 --> 00:43:10,307

bring me a stack

00:43:10,307 --> 00:43:11,057

of pies.

00:43:11,228 --> 00:43:12,548

Beck: meet me in Columbus.

00:43:12,548 --> 00:43:13,478

That would be fine.

00:43:13,538 --> 00:43:14,078

I mean,

00:43:14,269 --> 00:43:14,719

Dash: How far is the

00:43:14,719 --> 00:43:15,409

closest one?

00:43:15,609 --> 00:43:19,059

Beck: um, Washington Courthouse,

which is about a two hour drive.

00:43:19,249 --> 00:43:19,569

Dash: a bit much.

00:43:20,064 --> 00:43:20,304

Beck: Yeah.

00:43:20,344 --> 00:43:22,654

They started in Wheelers Bur,

which is in Scioto County.

00:43:22,654 --> 00:43:27,652

So they're a very local, chain and

they have spread south, towards like

00:43:27,652 --> 00:43:32,152

Kentucky, West Virginia, North Carolina,

Virginia, down through that area.

00:43:32,226 --> 00:43:34,596

Dash: There's not a lot of

restaurants in most of the towns I

00:43:34,596 --> 00:43:36,606

grew up in, especially not chains.

00:43:36,876 --> 00:43:40,896

So I got introduced to the world of

takeout food when I was in college.

00:43:40,973 --> 00:43:44,273

Beck: when I was a kid, there was a,

a restaurant, it was called Jim Dandy,

00:43:44,273 --> 00:43:45,843

I think they're still Um, But you

00:43:45,977 --> 00:43:46,267

Dash: Yeah.

00:43:46,593 --> 00:43:47,253

Beck: delivery.

00:43:47,283 --> 00:43:51,243

They had a big mo and a Coke, and it

was 99 cents, and we would order like

00:43:51,303 --> 00:43:53,253

20 of 'em and have 'em delivered.

00:43:53,282 --> 00:43:53,522

And then

00:43:53,817 --> 00:43:54,037

Dash: Wow.

00:43:54,422 --> 00:43:55,952

Beck: was a constant in my house.

00:43:55,952 --> 00:43:57,542

We ate that all the time.

00:43:57,602 --> 00:44:01,832

And then my mom had like five recipes

that she rotated that we had, and

00:44:01,832 --> 00:44:03,152

that was pretty much all we ate.

00:44:03,662 --> 00:44:06,332

but takeout like McDonald's

was a rare treat.

00:44:06,332 --> 00:44:09,212

We did never ate at places like

Wendy's or anything like that.

00:44:09,212 --> 00:44:11,102

Like, I don't even know

when that became a thing.

00:44:11,363 --> 00:44:12,743

Um, I didn't eat there until I was in high

00:44:12,743 --> 00:44:13,043

school.

00:44:13,043 --> 00:44:13,133

At

00:44:13,137 --> 00:44:13,337

Dash: either.

00:44:13,931 --> 00:44:14,882

I remember The first time I

00:44:14,882 --> 00:44:15,892

had like that

00:44:15,892 --> 00:44:18,232

Americanized Chinese takeout.

00:44:18,232 --> 00:44:18,292

Uh

00:44:18,372 --> 00:44:19,091

Beck: I remember it.

00:44:19,141 --> 00:44:19,726

Dash: Oh, I was

00:44:19,726 --> 00:44:20,486

hooked immediately.

00:44:21,321 --> 00:44:24,839

Beck: Well, I was afraid because

my parents were very, racist, I

00:44:24,839 --> 00:44:26,549

guess is the best word to use.

00:44:26,709 --> 00:44:30,159

My grandpa fought the Korean War and

he had a thing about Asian people.

00:44:30,519 --> 00:44:31,209

And so

00:44:31,224 --> 00:44:31,514

Dash: Yeah.

00:44:31,599 --> 00:44:32,919

Beck: we never went to anything like that.

00:44:32,919 --> 00:44:35,469

And my friend was like, if you

go eat with me, pay for yours.

00:44:35,469 --> 00:44:38,469

If you don't like it, I will buy

you McDonald's myself afterwards.

00:44:38,769 --> 00:44:39,969

And I was like, well, you can't beat that.

00:44:39,969 --> 00:44:40,179

Right?

00:44:40,179 --> 00:44:41,409

And then I tried sweet and sour chicken.

00:44:41,409 --> 00:44:43,839

It was gone like forever.

00:44:43,839 --> 00:44:46,089

It's my, like, one of my favorite

things in the whole world.

00:44:46,525 --> 00:44:49,825

One year, because for my, for in

my family, if it was your birthday,

00:44:49,825 --> 00:44:51,175

you got to pick where you go to eat.

00:44:51,295 --> 00:44:53,635

And one year I chose

the Chinese restaurant.

00:44:53,635 --> 00:44:54,925

Oh my God.

00:44:55,225 --> 00:44:56,245

It was an ordeal.

00:44:56,245 --> 00:44:59,485

My mom showed her ass and

my grandpa just ate chicken.

00:44:59,485 --> 00:45:02,425

Like that's all he ate was the, the

sweet and sour chicken with no sweet

00:45:02,425 --> 00:45:03,955

and sour, just like plates of it.

00:45:04,285 --> 00:45:09,839

Like it was When they stopped allowing

smoking in restaurants in Kentucky.

00:45:10,079 --> 00:45:13,559

We went to the Roadhouse for,

I think it was my birthday.

00:45:13,559 --> 00:45:16,559

And my mom got so mad that she

threw a crouton at the waitress,

00:45:16,559 --> 00:45:17,594

Dash: the Roadhouse.

00:45:17,675 --> 00:45:18,815

Beck: the Texas Roadhouse.

00:45:18,815 --> 00:45:19,385

Dash: Where at?

00:45:19,385 --> 00:45:19,925

Beck: Ashland.

00:45:19,925 --> 00:45:20,675

Dash: Oh, okay.

00:45:20,675 --> 00:45:21,185

I remember

00:45:21,185 --> 00:45:22,655

smoking sections.

00:45:22,705 --> 00:45:26,995

So when I was working in Pizza Hut, there

was a smoking section, which is just

00:45:26,995 --> 00:45:28,555

crazy, you know,

00:45:28,555 --> 00:45:30,475

Beck: Bingo was the worst for smoke.

00:45:30,664 --> 00:45:34,444

Dash: I see I've, I've worked at

a lot of places as they started

00:45:34,444 --> 00:45:35,764

to enforce a no smoking

00:45:35,764 --> 00:45:36,244

rule.

00:45:36,454 --> 00:45:37,594

I just got to experience that.

00:45:37,594 --> 00:45:41,314

in Multiple places, like two, two

different bowling alleys trying to.

00:45:41,577 --> 00:45:42,537

Just having to argue with

00:45:42,537 --> 00:45:43,767

people every fucking day.

00:45:43,857 --> 00:45:45,297

Yet, no, you can't smoke in here

00:45:45,297 --> 00:45:45,657

now.

00:45:46,047 --> 00:45:46,707

I don't know why

00:45:46,707 --> 00:45:47,697

it's different today than it was

00:45:47,697 --> 00:45:48,117

yesterday.

00:45:48,117 --> 00:45:49,617

Just, I, I didn't make this rule.

00:45:49,837 --> 00:45:50,187

Beck: Right.

00:45:51,464 --> 00:45:51,524

Yeah.

00:45:51,524 --> 00:45:52,544

Mom, mom would show her ass.

00:45:58,019 --> 00:46:01,349

But she was a waitress for many years

before they bought the, the shop.

00:46:01,514 --> 00:46:04,544

She was a waitress and I always

thought that would make you a

00:46:04,544 --> 00:46:08,739

better waitress, which to mom,

I, I tip like nobody's business.

00:46:08,739 --> 00:46:11,448

I'm always a 25 percenter,

and that kind of thing,

00:46:11,575 --> 00:46:15,325

Dash: Sometimes people I know who

are the hardest on servers were

00:46:15,325 --> 00:46:19,285

servers themselves, and it's like they

think that that gives them some sort

00:46:19,285 --> 00:46:21,505

of like moral high ground or something.

00:46:21,505 --> 00:46:23,785

Like I can judge them more harshly

because I know how it's supposed to

00:46:23,785 --> 00:46:28,075

be done, rather than, I can't imagine

what kind of day they might be having

00:46:28,075 --> 00:46:33,015

and can find it in myself to forgive

any minor flaw in their service.

00:46:33,179 --> 00:46:34,829

Beck: I'm definitely at the ladder there.

00:46:34,829 --> 00:46:35,069

Dash: Yeah.

00:46:35,074 --> 00:46:37,019

I'm almo, I'm a little

too good at imagining

00:46:37,019 --> 00:46:38,189

myself in other people's shoes.

00:46:38,659 --> 00:46:39,439

Beck: Well, I've had that job.

00:46:39,439 --> 00:46:43,519

My very first job was the wait

was as a waitress and a a, a

00:46:43,519 --> 00:46:45,679

dairy bar employee.

00:46:45,949 --> 00:46:49,069

I learned how to make cones and

banana splits and that kind of thing.

00:46:49,069 --> 00:46:50,749

On top of being a terrible waitress.