There’s no denying that being a woman can be seriously tough. We have to manage everything from hormonal fluctuations to societal disadvantages and pay discrepancies, all while contending with ongoing comparisons to other women who seem to have it all.
Amidst all of that, it’s pretty easy to forget that men also have issues worthy of examining, but it’s true. They do – and by taking part in the examination, we can find the answers to a wide range of questions we might never have thought to ask.
Start with the classics and you’ll unearth outdated ideals of men as the sole providers, charged with taking care of everything – even issues that don’t belong to them.
You’ll also find the harmful, long-ranging impact of the belief that men aren’t supposed to ask for help – even when they find themselves up against impossible situations. The idea that emotions and vulnerabilities are taboo, not only at work but also in the home, has caused generations of men a great deal of pain and anxiety.
Then there’s the fallacy that men should be able to work without rest, and that doing so should be seen as a mark of manhood.
We could go on (and on), but the underlying truth is that men are affected by burnout – and more often than not, the effects carry over to everyone else in their households.
Former corporate leader Jim Young knows all about the impact burnout can have on men.
After a 25-year career, he reinvented himself and forged a new trajectory as a coach, speaker and author for male leaders. Along the way, he coined the term “expansive intimacy” – a game-changing addition to the lexicon for male leaders everywhere.
The lessons Jim has learned about setting boundaries, experiencing emotions and vulnerability, finding strong male role models and forming connections with others deserve an audience – and that’s what the SheBurns podcast is all about.
In this episode, Jim shares a few key insights into burnout and relationships for men, the lies society perpetuates about how men work, and the power of intimacy in dismantling burnout.
As partners, fathers, brothers and friends, men play such an important role in many of our lives, and when burnout affects them, it often has a run-on effect. By gaining an understanding of their experiences, we can not only create more harmonious relationships in our homes, but also glean new insights into our own struggles with burnout.
“A lot of the people that I speak with, they actually put a timeline on their burnout and they think it was just with their corporate job, but now that they look back…like you said, in their childhood, those seeds are planted along the way. It really comes down to our beliefs, right? I mean, how we're socialized in society, and then also how we are raised as well, and our belief in ourselves.” - Hannah Austin
“I never thought about my mortality on a serious level, and I think that pandemic caused us all to think about our mortality, because we didn't know for so long, like, “Am I going to catch this and die?” So then the question is, well, what really matters? And like, “Wait a minute, I'm spending 60 hours a week at work, and I'm coming home frustrated, and I'm not spending quality time with the people that I love the most.” - Jim Young
“In order to experience intimacy, we need to be with other people, and be curious about them and reveal things about ourselves. We have to let our inner worlds be accessible to other people.” - Jim Young
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