Speaker: 00:00:01

Hey, it's Cousin Vinny here with

the third installment of the Years

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of Darkness that started in 2020.

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Holy crapo.

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If you were listening to the other

two podcasts, the one about my, uh,

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my blindness, being blinded, uh, by

a fucked up doctor who misdiagnosed

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it for months and months and months,

and kept me in the total dark phys-

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physically and, and spiritually.

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But that is now gone.

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Uh, we're in the, um, forward stages

of that, uh, part of my healing.

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So the vision is pretty much under

control, just gotta be a little

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more careful, um, putting contact

lenses in and not crushing them by

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accident, 'cause 500 bucks a piece.

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Anyway, got that taken

care of this last week.

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So I've got my new lens in, the

new super-duper powered one.

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I, uh, ordered a backup.

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Hopefully I don't break any more of

these damn things until I go back for

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my six-month checkup to see, uh, how

things are going with the eyeballs.

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So eyes are in good shape.

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My right eye is doing well.

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It's doing as best as it ever

done in, in 60, 70 years.

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So on the eyesight,

uh, good, good results.

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Cancer, gone, in remission.

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That too is in, uh, the maintenance

stages now of just, uh, going in

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for scans every six months or so.

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I think I've got another one coming up

in a couple months, and then we go to,

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uh, biannual and then annual after that.

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But, uh, all my blood has been good.

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Um, no, um, no other

issues with, with that.

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That, that's excuse me, pretty

much- Taken care of, which, ooh,

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that was a, that was a big one.

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Um, you know, the cancer with, with

the diagnosis and the surgeries

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and, uh, the, the therapies and

the, the, the aftercare and wow.

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And, and now getting used to the,

the way my body system now works.

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It's not like normal p- folks,

but it could've been worse.

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I could've been on a bag

for the rest of my life.

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So now I just gotta think about, you

know, what I'm doing before I go do it

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and make sure I prepare for it correctly.

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You know, it's, it's…

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Excuse me.

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Man, what is it?

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Every time I get behind a mic

lately, I get these hacking coughs.

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I think it's a nerve thing.

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I haven't been behind a mic in, in years,

and, uh, I think part of it is just the,

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the stress factor of, of doing this again.

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Um, I, I've, I've never been shy

about, you know, getting behind a mic

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and talking, and I'm still not shy.

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It's just that, um, occasionally I guess,

uh, it's, it's a nerve thing, I think.

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It's a, it's a nervous hack

more than anything else.

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So cancer, check.

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Um, you know, if you heard my last

episode on that, uh, that was just, uh…

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It was a drain.

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It was a mental and physical drain

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Uh, there are thousands of people

go through it every single day,

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and I pray for all of them.

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Uh, I, I, I know what they're going

through, but you really don't know

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what someone's going through unless

you've been in that position.

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And, uh, I can appreciate all the

people that, you know, participated

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and helped, all the, all the medical

people and my personal friends.

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It's, it's, it's just very, very,

um, stressful Not only on the

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body, but the mind and your soul.

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You know, there are

people who just give up.

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They, they just can't take it, and

they let their, uh, systems go down,

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the immune systems go down, and,

and it, and it just takes them out.

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And I keep on thinking and keep

on saying that, you know, God has

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other reasons for me to be here.

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Um, you know, I, I'm, I'm not feeling

like I was a chosen person, but I

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just think that there's a purpose

in my life, meaning and purpose.

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Still hadn't figured out what it is.

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I think with doing these podcasts

now, I'm gonna try to go to

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two a week now after this.

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After my birthday on the ninth,

I'm gonna go to two a week,

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probably Tuesdays and, and Fridays.

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Um, maybe try to do a live

one occasionally in between

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someplace, one of those two.

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But a Tuesday will be kinda

like a, you know, Taco Tuesday

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type thing, uh, just fun stuff.

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And then Fridays, it's gonna be more

professional, uh, dealing with the real

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estate industry and my profession that

I've been doing for the last 50 years.

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So, and then may occasionally throw in

a little surprise one or on the road

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one or whatever kind of one, whatever

kind of mischief we can get into.

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Okay, so let's talk about the, uh,

the third of the trifecta, the hip.

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Actually, my hip was hurting

before all this started happening.

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Uh, probably, I'm gonna

say: 2020

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Um, we were in a previous relationship

at the time, and we were in, uh, St.

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Petersburg and Tampa and Clearwater,

and we were out on the beach, um, around

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Christmas time, and they had the Christmas

decorations up in the, in the park in

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Largo, so we went to go see that, and my

hip just started hurting for some reason.

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I mean, just giving me pain.

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And I had a hard time walking and, and

I was telling her that, you know, "Hey,

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look, can we slow down a little bit?"

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And that night also on the way home, my

vision started getting kinda yucky-ish.

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Uh, it was okay to drive, but it just…

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It was one of the things we stopped

at, uh, Krispy Kreme to get their

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hot donuts before we left town.

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And I said to her, I said, "You know,

my hip's just not feeling right."

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And I wasn't…

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didn't do anything to

strain it or, or mess it up.

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It just didn't feel right.

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So for the next, you know, few months,

occasionally get a little more pain in

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that right hip and, and, um, it just

doesn't seem that it wanted to go away,

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and it got worse and worse and worse.

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And as I was in the, um,

beginning phases of my eye issues

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um- Uh, it, it got real bad.

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Um, I would say probably the eye

issue started in August of: 2020

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I would say probably by

Christmas I was using a cane.

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I was having difficulty on my right leg,

right hip, and, um, it, it-- I started

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using a cane and mastered the cane.

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Uh, and it became part of my

appendage, uh, to keep me balanced

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and to keep me from falling over.

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So, uh, the cane

procedure was interesting.

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I went on YouTube and, you know,

everyone tells you how to use a cane,

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where does it need to be and, you know,

well, it's in the opposing leg of the

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pain, so if your right leg is hurting,

use it in your left hand or left side.

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And the placement of where the, the

handle is, uh, it, it's suggested

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that you put your hands by your side

and wherever your, uh, hand wraps,

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that's the height of the cane.

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You don't want your arm bending.

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You want your arm to be straight so you're

not putting str-stress on the, on the,

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uh, the muscles in your arm also so that

you have a straight arm holding the cane.

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So I positioned the cane for my left

side, notched it down to where I needed,

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and started using the cane back in 2020.

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And, uh, went to the doctor and he goes,

"Yeah, we can do surgery for that."

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But the problem is, is that when they

wanted to do the surgery for my hip is

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when all my eyesight issues hit, and I

kept on putting it off, putting it off.

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I said, "Look, if I gotta do my hip,

that's a whole nother procedure.

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I may not be able to get

around as easily as I could."

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And I was dealing with my

vision loss at the same time

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and the cancer at the same time.

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So I had a triple whammy, uh, blind,

deaf, and dumb, as they call it.

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And it was one of those things where,

okay, priorities, you know, what's

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the most critical thing for me?

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So the vision was the first thing.

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Uh, you know, like I said before in

the last, you know, episodes, vision

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became the, the number one priority.

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And I'm, I'm blending everything now

into this final podcast about this.

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Occasionally, I'll talk a little bit

about this with others and, and other

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people that I know that have been

through, you know, serious illnesses.

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So I learned to master the cane.

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Uh, dealt with the cane all the

way through my chemo and radiation.

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Uh, got really good with it so that

I wasn't putting any more stress

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on my hip because the doctor says,

"Man, we gotta keep you healthy."

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And I didn't wanna take drugs for

the hip for pain because I was taking

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drugs for the chemo and the radiation

and the cancer and my eyesight

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And it was a b- it was a balance

between, okay, put up with the pain

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in your hip or go blind forever.

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Hmm, let me think.

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Okay, let's get the eyes taken care of.

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And that became a big cluster, uh,

because of, you know, just stupidity

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on, on, uh, on that first doctor who

did the first procedure on my cataracts.

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He just fucked me up big time.

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And then in the in-between part is, you

know, um, I postponed getting, uh, the

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colonoscopy, you know, at that time.

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Waited almost nine months,

didn't get the colonoscopy, and

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I get diagnosed with the cancer.

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So that put the hip on the back burner

because the doctor said, "Look, we don't

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wanna go doing anything to your hip if

we're doing also something about your

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cancer in that general area, and we don't

wanna, you know, stress your systems out."

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And I'm going, "Okay.

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What can I do about the hip?"

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So they gave me some pills or painkillers

and, you know, I, I've been blessed

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not to take a lot of painkillers.

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I maybe take an ibuprofen once in a while.

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I, I just…

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I'll put up with the pain.

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I know it's not good to do because it's

not good for your body, but I stressed

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it out and I, I made it through it.

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So the hip got pushed to the back.

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And again, you know, you don't know

what you don't know until it happens,

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and to decide up front, "I'm gonna

do this, this, and this," you don't.

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You basically take each issue

as it comes across the table.

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You evaluate it.

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You do, uh, a checks and balances.

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You do the old Ben

Franklin close, you know.

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How many on this side?

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How many on that side?

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Okay, this side wins.

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And it was tough.

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It was really tough.

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But I knew that I could put up

with the pain in my hip if I

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knew I could get my vision back.

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Uh, that was my priority 'cause, you know,

great, you got a hip, but you can't see.

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So who cares about getting around?

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Not, not that, that

I'm making light of it.

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It was just part of my thinking

process that, okay, my vision

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was the most important component.

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Again, cancer, yeah.

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Um, yeah, I could have it, which I did.

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I could get it treated, which I did.

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You can get, not cured, but you can

at least, you know, get it under

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control so that it doesn't come

back and rear its ugly head again.

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It did.

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And the hip, okay, it's painful at times.

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Um, so I ended up getting the first

hip surgery in February of 20-

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What was that?

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2024?

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Yeah

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Yeah.

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No.

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What was it?

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Yeah.

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No, no, it was June of 2024 that I

had the, uh, the first hip surgery.

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So it was kinda like at the end of my

chemo radiation, the doctor cleared me of,

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uh, all the craziness that was going on.

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Um, I had a cataract…

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No, I didn't have any cataract

surgery yet, done yet.

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Uh, gosh.

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You know, all this stuff blends

together and I, I tried to put

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some kind of a, a TikTok of all the

events, but you know, it, it, it…

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The long story short is three

major body components poop out.

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So in 2024, yeah, it was June of

: 2024

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Uh, I was apprehensive about going to a

doctor here locally in, in Citrus County.

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I was thinking about going back to Tampa

or Gainesville, you know, where they

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have other surgeons and, and stuff.

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And I, I, I, um, put my request

in through the VA, and the VA, you

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know, got me a doctor to go see.

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And, uh, my friend Pete, at the time,

'cause I still wasn't able to drive,

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I couldn't see well enough to drive,

'cause I was still in my blind phase.

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We went to go visit a doctor in,

uh, Beverly Hills here, and it was

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a referral from the, uh, the VA.

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And I've learned something over the years

of being in enough doctor's offices.

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Uh, I probably have had my blood drawn

500 times in the last five, six years.

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At least 500 times I've been poked,

and I've been in enough waiting rooms

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in doctor's offices to read a room.

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And I've noticed in certain practices,

like, um, when I was going for my,

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um, cancer treatments and my radiation

treatments, um, the doctor's reception

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area were very calm and quiet.

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Yeah, the, the chemo room was packed,

but that's just the way it is.

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But it was just the, the, the, the,

the, the feeling there was calm.

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It was, there was no, "Woe

is me, I'm gonna die now."

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And the same goes back to, um,

you know, when I was having

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my, uh, my eye surgeries.

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Um, you know, going into the

doctor's offices and the doctors

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were very calm, um, wasn't rushed.

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They didn't make me feel like I was

just a number, you know, in their, in

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their food chain like some of them are.

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Then I go to this hip doctor that

was referred to me in Beverly Hills

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with Pete, and we had some X-rays.

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And, uh, I'm, I'm sitting in the

lobby with Pete and we're kinda…

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I'm sensing the room, and it was full.

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I mean, you know, I've been in waiting

rooms and all of us have been in

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doctor's waiting rooms, and you can

pretty much judge a doctor's, um-

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What's the word I'm looking for?

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His care of his, of his, of his,

you know, future, uh, patients

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Like I said, when I went to

the eye doctor's, the waiting

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rooms were calm, quiet.

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Yeah, a couple were a little

crowded 'cause it was at the

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university down in Tampa.

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Yeah, there was a lot of people, but

there was constant staff giving you

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updates, uh, you know, telling you,

"Hey, look, uh, the doctor's running

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about 20 minutes la-" You know, they

kept you up to date as to what was going

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on, didn't make you feel like you were

just gonna sit there in limbo for hours.

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Now, granted, there were times when

I was at the eye doctor down there

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where we sat there for two hours.

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You know, he was so backed up, you

know, and they apologized, come out,

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"We're sorry," you know, "we'll,

we'll get you in as soon as we can."

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But when they got you in there,

you know, you were the focus.

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And, and the same, the same thing

happened with the hip doctor.

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Now let me go back to the,

um, the first hip doctor.

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We're in the waiting room and, um,

I'm hearing, you know, conversations

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going on, and people just…

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You could sense there was a lot of

pain in the room, because people were

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talking about the pain they were in.

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And you know going, "Oh, I had my

surgery last week, and this is going on."

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Or you know, "I'm, I'm scheduled to

have surgery and I'm in a lot of pain."

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And it, it seemed like there was

a, was a freaking meat market.

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So we get in to meet the doctor,

and I had some stuff, some

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files and some, some documents.

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I think we had even some X-rays

that were shot by the VA.

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And I handed them to the doctor, and

right that point, he was so standoffish.

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I looked over to Pete, he

looked at me and I go, "Oh."

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I'm thinking to myself,

"This is not gonna go good."

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So I started asking him some questions.

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He goes, "No, just stop.

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Let me, let me tell you what I got here."

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So instead of me giving him some feedback

or some information so he could get

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a feedback on it, he was telling me

what he was gonna do, how he was gonna

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do it, and when he was gonna do it.

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And he went on and on and on.

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He didn't even, he didn't even

address the X-ray that I handed him.

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He said, "We'll get some X-rays shot

right now and then we'll do an evaluation.

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We'll bring you in and we'll

set you up for surgery."

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And he kept on going on and on.

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And I said, "Stop right there.

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I'm not a number in your turnstile.

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You know, just don't take a

number and sit here and wait here.

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: 00:17:09

Uh, I've got some stuff here

I'd like you to take a look at.

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: 00:17:13

Give me your impressions.

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: 00:17:15

Do a, you know, a composite

or a, a comparison of the two

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: 00:17:19

and, and tell me what you see.

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: 00:17:21

Yeah, you're gonna take

X-rays, and I understand that.

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You know, you may have a different

way you wanna shoot the shots.

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That's fine, that's understandable."

293

: 00:17:27

You know, and each of my doctors would

say, "Well, well, you know, we did these,

294

: 00:17:30

but you know, this one is not as good.

295

: 00:17:32

Let's go do another one."

296

: 00:17:33

"Okay, do it."

297

: 00:17:35

He got offended.

298

: 00:17:36

He got fucking offended that

we challenged him to ask him to

299

: 00:17:41

look at what I was handing him.

300

: 00:17:43

I looked at Pete and I said, "Let's get

the fuck outta here," and we walked out.

301

: 00:17:48

I hate to use the

language, but I, it just…

302

: 00:17:51

Every ti- I, I felt sorry for

those people in that waiting room.

303

: 00:17:54

I was just, I wanted to say,

"Get the hell out of here.

304

: 00:17:56

Go find another doctor.

305

: 00:17:57

This guy is greedy,

selfish, and egotistical."

306

: 00:18:03

And, you know, we've all been there.

307

: 00:18:05

You've all been there.

308

: 00:18:06

Somebody's in this audience has been

there and had, had that happen to them.

309

: 00:18:09

There's no reason for that.

310

: 00:18:11

He was just looking numbers.

311

: 00:18:14

That's all.

312

: 00:18:14

You know, he was a burn and churn.

313

: 00:18:16

You know, how many beds can I put…

314

: 00:18:17

You know, heads in beds can I get in

so I can get some surgery out of these?

315

: 00:18:21

And we walked out, and that was the

end of that whole ordeal, and that's

316

: 00:18:24

when the, you know, the, the task

came on to try to find another doctor.

317

: 00:18:28

So I looked in Gainesville, and then,

uh, I asked my eye doctor, um, and my

318

: 00:18:34

chemo doctor some recommendations of

some, some hip doctors in, in, in Tampa.

319

: 00:18:40

And, uh, somehow,

320

: 00:18:45

we ended up, uh, getting the doctor

in Inve- And I, I'm terrible.

321

: 00:18:51

At some point in the future, maybe

I'll get all the doctors' names and,

322

: 00:18:54

and do a tribute to every single…

323

: 00:18:55

I…

324

: 00:18:55

You know, that's not a bad idea.

325

: 00:18:57

I think I'm gonna do that.

326

: 00:18:58

I am going to do a podcast of tributes

to each of the doctors and the staff.

327

: 00:19:02

I, I've got records, and I'm

gonna compile all of the names

328

: 00:19:08

of, of, of the people who were

the most helpful, generous, kind,

329

: 00:19:13

courteous, caring people that I met.

330

: 00:19:17

You know, uh, there, there were tons

of them, tons of people who just,

331

: 00:19:23

you know, made your day, you know.

332

: 00:19:26

Um, and, and most of them I couldn't

even see, but I heard it in their voices.

333

: 00:19:32

But going back to that

sleazebag, it was terrible.

334

: 00:19:35

So ended up finding a

doctor at, in, in Inverness

335

: 00:19:40

Dr.

336

: 00:19:41

Bendowski, I remembered him, and Dr.

337

: 00:19:45

Morissette who did my,

um, cancer, and, um, Dr.

338

: 00:19:52

Espana who did my cornea transplant.

339

: 00:19:54

Those are the three major doctors.

340

: 00:19:56

The cornea transplant, Dr.

341

: 00:19:57

Espana, Dr.

342

: 00:19:59

Morissette for my cancer, and Dr.,

343

: 00:20:03

um, Bendowski for my hips.

344

: 00:20:07

All three excellent physicians, their

staff, their assistants, their second-tier

345

: 00:20:12

doctors that, you know, worked with them

in, in the procedures, every one of them.

346

: 00:20:17

Now, I gotta say that the

other part was the rehab part.

347

: 00:20:23

Um, the first episode with

rehab, eh, not so good.

348

: 00:20:29

Uh, I didn't know what to expect.

349

: 00:20:31

You know, I'm not being able to

see, that wrong ambulance drive

350

: 00:20:34

from Tampa General to, to Lecanto.

351

: 00:20:37

Um, you know, with the foul-up

with the bed and, and all of

352

: 00:20:42

the things that were there.

353

: 00:20:43

The only thing that was the greatest

part of that was that Marie sent me,

354

: 00:20:47

uh, a bacon cheeseburger or a Baconator,

Baconator from, uh, uh, um, Wendy's.

355

: 00:20:53

And, and, um, it was around Valentine's

Day, she sent me donuts and balloons, and,

356

: 00:20:59

oh, it just, it, it just lifted my spirits

357

: 00:21:04

Um, but that was a, a, a trying time

during that because, you know, not

358

: 00:21:09

being able to see, just had this

procedure done, you know, and, and

359

: 00:21:13

the new poop bag on and, oh, geez.

360

: 00:21:16

It, it, it was-- That,

that was, you know…

361

: 00:21:18

Again,

362

: 00:21:21

you know, my hip was hurting, and

it was hard to move around a lot of

363

: 00:21:24

times and, and the nurses were very

patient with me and, and to get me

364

: 00:21:28

so that I didn't have any pain and

propping my legs up and stuff like that.

365

: 00:21:31

Same thing when I was

doing my, uh, radiation.

366

: 00:21:34

I propped my legs up to make

sure my hip was not out of line

367

: 00:21:37

so that it wouldn't hurt me.

368

: 00:21:39

So I gotta say that throughout the

entire process, even though my hip got

369

: 00:21:43

put to the last, and which was the first

thing to, to go, uh, throughout the

370

: 00:21:48

entire, uh, ordeal, there were people

there who, you know, evaluated it and,

371

: 00:21:54

and, and, and made sure that I was

comfortable so that I wouldn't be hurting

372

: 00:21:58

myself or making myself feel more pain.

373

: 00:22:00

So all along the way, I, I

gotta thank everyone for that.

374

: 00:22:05

But after, uh, the, the first

surgery, and I was apprehensive.

375

: 00:22:09

I mean, and when he told me what he was

gonna do, they, they, you know, they slice

376

: 00:22:13

your side open and he says, "Yeah, we're

gonna put little, uh, widget staples."

377

: 00:22:19

I got them in a jar.

378

: 00:22:20

That was the other one I kept, the,

the aftermath from the surgery.

379

: 00:22:23

I didn't get the second one.

380

: 00:22:24

I got the first one.

381

: 00:22:24

I don't know why I didn't

get the second one.

382

: 00:22:26

But I got all the little staples that

they stuck in me to, to put the seam

383

: 00:22:31

together like they used to do years ago.

384

: 00:22:33

They'd just pull two pieces of

skin together and stitch it.

385

: 00:22:36

And, and I now have, you know,

matching scars on my right

386

: 00:22:39

hip, which was done recently.

387

: 00:22:42

I mean, uh, the first one in,

in twenty twenty-four and then

388

: 00:22:44

February 18th of this year.

389

: 00:22:46

Of…

390

: 00:22:46

Yeah, yeah, February.

391

: 00:22:48

Holy crap.

392

: 00:22:50

February I had the second hip.

393

: 00:22:52

Uh, yeah, and Marie was for that, here

for that one, and, um, she was just

394

: 00:22:56

amazed at how, how well I was feeling.

395

: 00:22:58

I came out of the, the surgery

really well, and they said,

396

: 00:23:01

"Do you wanna go to rehab?"

397

: 00:23:02

"No," I said, "I wanna go home."

398

: 00:23:03

And came home and, you know, she

worked with me to keep me moving and

399

: 00:23:08

kept me, uh, active so that my leg,

you know, wouldn't do anything stupid.

400

: 00:23:11

And here I am today, a couple of days

from my birthday on August the 9th,

401

: 00:23:17

and my hip is doing well, both of them.

402

: 00:23:19

Occasionally I have a little bit

of pain, but I think part of it

403

: 00:23:22

is I've lost so much fat that it's

now just, uh, meat on the bone.

404

: 00:23:27

Uh, I don't have any fat in my hips.

405

: 00:23:30

Um, but they both function well.

406

: 00:23:33

I still treat them gingerly

407

: 00:23:37

I don't, you know, jumping

out of the car real easy.

408

: 00:23:39

I use the hand grips to get

myself in and out to, to make sure

409

: 00:23:41

that I don't do anything stupid.

410

: 00:23:44

Um, but my next major goal is on the

f- on Monday, the 10th, to be at the

411

: 00:23:51

gym at least two, three times a week

to start building up my strength in my

412

: 00:23:55

legs and my arms 'cause I got no fat.

413

: 00:23:58

I'm down to skin and bones.

414

: 00:24:00

I, I am down to my lowest weight

that I've been in in forever.

415

: 00:24:03

I'm like at 190.

416

: 00:24:05

I mean, not 190, 149.

417

: 00:24:09

I mean, I have lost

weight, but I'm not sickly.

418

: 00:24:12

I'm just…

419

: 00:24:13

I just…

420

: 00:24:14

I can't put it on.

421

: 00:24:15

I don't know if it's from the, the, the

rectal surgery, now that my system has

422

: 00:24:20

been repositioned and re-readjusted,

that I don't keep so much poop in me

423

: 00:24:25

anymore, so I'm not so full of shit.

424

: 00:24:28

Well, people say that all the

time, but I'm not so full of it.

425

: 00:24:32

So I wanna build up my, my lower strength,

my lower body strength, and my upper.

426

: 00:24:37

I still have the neuropathy in my feet.

427

: 00:24:40

Uh, it's gotten down to my ankles,

so it's not in my entire leg.

428

: 00:24:46

It's just down to my ankles

and into my feet, and it's,

429

: 00:24:48

it's funky when you're walking.

430

: 00:24:50

It's not pins and needles.

431

: 00:24:51

It just feels…

432

: 00:24:55

I have presence of where I am.

433

: 00:24:56

I know what I'm walking on.

434

: 00:24:58

I can feel it.

435

: 00:24:59

I can, you know, scrunch my toes.

436

: 00:25:01

It just, it, it just feels like

there's something there, and I,

437

: 00:25:05

I, I, I've been trying hard to, to

try to describe that, that feeling.

438

: 00:25:11

I don't know how to do it, to

identify the feeling, but it's there.

439

: 00:25:17

As far as my hip is concerned,

feels good, both of them.

440

: 00:25:22

Uh, the right one occasionally

gives a little tingle in it, um,

441

: 00:25:27

but the left one, I don't even know.

442

: 00:25:29

It, it, it, it's…

443

: 00:25:31

There's no pain.

444

: 00:25:32

There, there's no pain.

445

: 00:25:33

I think part of the tingling part is

I don't have any meat on the bone,

446

: 00:25:36

so I think once I put a little fat

on, maybe it's just the bone won't be

447

: 00:25:39

rubbing so hard against my, um, my skin.

448

: 00:25:46

So that was all three episodes.

449

: 00:25:49

The cancer, the eyesight, and the hips.

450

: 00:25:54

I'm gonna be 76 years old on the 9th

451

: 00:26:00

There have been a lot of people along

the way who have helped me, too many

452

: 00:26:05

sometimes to name, and they will all

forever, ever hold a place in my heart.

453

: 00:26:14

There are some people that

were there who disappeared.

454

: 00:26:19

They couldn't…

455

: 00:26:20

They didn't wanna stick around

for the hard stuff, you know?

456

: 00:26:24

They just bailed, and that's fine.

457

: 00:26:28

One of my closest friends passed

away in the middle of all this.

458

: 00:26:33

Um, we, we kinda grew up here in

Crystal River, and we had made

459

: 00:26:38

plans that once I could, you know,

get around with my vision, we'd

460

: 00:26:42

hit the road and do a road trip.

461

: 00:26:44

Mike, I miss you, man.

462

: 00:26:48

We didn't get to do our road trip.

463

: 00:26:50

Maybe one day I'll see you again to do it.

464

: 00:26:55

And there, you know, there have

been a few others that, uh, bailed

465

: 00:27:02

Won't mention her name

466

: 00:27:06

But she, she, uh, in the beginning

there when the, um, the ice ice started

467

: 00:27:11

going south and everything else started

getting bad in the beginning back in

468

: 00:27:16

2020, uh, they just bailed, disappeared.

469

: 00:27:21

Which is, you know, your choice.

470

: 00:27:25

You didn't wanna be

there for the fun stuff.

471

: 00:27:27

And then all the other people who

have been a part of my life since

472

: 00:27:30

then, I, I wanna thank you all.

473

: 00:27:34

My sister, Pete, Dwayne, you know, Millie.

474

: 00:27:39

Oh God, Marie.

475

: 00:27:41

Um-

476

: 00:27:46

Just a, a lot of people.

477

: 00:27:49

And a lot of them have, you know,

pretty much have gone back to their

478

: 00:27:51

own lives and, and I understand that.

479

: 00:27:54

You know, they, they, they d- they

served their purpose at the time,

480

: 00:27:58

and I, I, I deeply appreciated

every single one of them.

481

: 00:28:04

I'm now at another phase in my

life trying to, uh, recapture that

482

: 00:28:12

zest that I had before all this

happened by taking and, and building

483

: 00:28:17

this studio here at the house.

484

: 00:28:21

I had a choice of, uh,

moving or not moving,

485

: 00:28:25

and the reason for not

moving is two things.

486

: 00:28:29

One, I was established here.

487

: 00:28:31

I felt comfortable here.

488

: 00:28:32

I have memories here, and I've

got a place where I can work from.

489

: 00:28:36

I can get anywhere from

here pretty quickly.

490

: 00:28:40

Um, and there is hope for the future

491

: 00:28:46

Don't know where it's going

492

: 00:28:50

I'm

493

: 00:28:54

I'm gonna be cautiously optimistic

494

: 00:28:59

Things happen for a reason sometimes.

495

: 00:29:02

We don't know what they are.

496

: 00:29:04

We may never know.

497

: 00:29:07

I do know that, um

498

: 00:29:13

Some people have made impacts

on you, some have not.

499

: 00:29:17

Some left a bad taste in your mouth.

500

: 00:29:20

Those who

501

: 00:29:24

Were there from the hard parts to

the easy parts to the everyday parts.

502

: 00:29:30

Thank you.

503

: 00:29:33

So where's my life going from here?

504

: 00:29:37

Well, at the moment, I'm trying

to refocus my time and energy

505

: 00:29:45

back to my real estate practice.

506

: 00:29:47

More of a, um, consultant.

507

: 00:29:52

Sales I enjoy

508

: 00:29:57

Education is the other part of it.

509

: 00:29:59

Putting together training.

510

: 00:30:01

The industry is, is, and, and I'm

going off topic now, I understand that.

511

: 00:30:06

But it, it's just now that it, it's

in my head, I'm gonna spurt it out

512

: 00:30:10

because if I don't, I'm gonna be upset

513

: 00:30:15

I know that my wellbeing is done.

514

: 00:30:20

All I gotta do now is, is,

is, uh, um, fix my heart

515

: 00:30:27

It's, it's heavy.

516

: 00:30:29

Very heavy

517

: 00:30:33

My heart was headed in a direction

I thought was gonna be just

518

: 00:30:36

tremendous, and it got bushwhacked

519

: 00:30:50

So what does Vinnie DeRoto,

Vinnie DeRosa want to do now?

520

: 00:30:55

Well, I'm not gonna reinvent myself

'cause I'm pretty much who I am

521

: 00:31:05

I do have things to share

522

: 00:31:08

And I think the medium that I'm on now

is the most efficient, most effective.

523

: 00:31:14

I know how to talk

524

: 00:31:21

I've seen a lot, done a lot

525

: 00:31:27

Just thinking back on the last 76

526

: 00:31:31

years

527

: 00:31:34

of the things that I've done that I

didn't know that were gonna either work

528

: 00:31:41

or not work, took a chance, took a risk

529

: 00:31:47

Some of them were good

and some were really bad.

530

: 00:31:53

And if people tell you that, you

know, they've never had a failure

531

: 00:31:56

in their life, they're lying to you

532

: 00:32:00

You will fail

533

: 00:32:03

It's just what you do

with it after it happens

534

: 00:32:09

When you're there financially

at the end of your ropes going,

535

: 00:32:13

"Oh my gosh, what do I do now?"

536

: 00:32:16

And you let someone else take over

it, it will, it will turn for you

537

: 00:32:22

as long as you do a few things.

538

: 00:32:24

One is you just be honest.

539

: 00:32:27

That, you know, I used to get friends

of mine saying, "Why aren't you so--

540

: 00:32:30

You're not as rich as these other

real estate agents in the industry?"

541

: 00:32:33

I said, "Because I can't

lie, cheat, or steal.

542

: 00:32:37

I can't sit there and lie to you and tell

you your property is worth this when I

543

: 00:32:41

know it's not worth that, or convince a

buyer to pay more for a house than it's

544

: 00:32:46

really worth or its reproduction cost,

reproduction, you know, reproducing cost.

545

: 00:32:51

I can't do that.

546

: 00:32:52

I can't sit there and, and be

egotistical and say, 'Well,

547

: 00:32:55

I made 30 sales this month.

548

: 00:32:57

I'm the top-notch.'"

549

: 00:32:58

I don't give a rat's ass who you are.

550

: 00:33:00

How did you get there?

551

: 00:33:01

Who did you abuse to get there?

552

: 00:33:03

You know, and, and, and what I'm saying,

and again, this is gonna be a whole

553

: 00:33:06

'nother episode for my Fiduciary Fridays,

which I think we're gonna start next week.

554

: 00:33:17

And if it's just me for a while,

that's good, but I got friends around

555

: 00:33:20

the country that may join in with me.

556

: 00:33:21

So I'm giving you a little

preview of some of the things

557

: 00:33:23

that, that are important to me.

558

: 00:33:27

Um, monetarily, yeah, I've made some

good money and I've made some bad money.

559

: 00:33:32

I mean bad meaning I've

lost a lot of money.

560

: 00:33:34

I've made some bad decisions or got

involved with people who were not as,

561

: 00:33:39

um, dedicated to what I wanted to do.

562

: 00:33:42

They wanted to go off on their own

little tangents within the company,

563

: 00:33:45

and it, it wasn't the way to go.

564

: 00:33:47

And again, I, I used to get this from my

dad occasionally, and, and it kinda hurt.

565

: 00:33:53

He goes, "Why aren't you more successful

as your other friends in real estate are?"

566

: 00:33:57

And I go, "Dad, 'cause I can't

lie, cheat, or steal from people."

567

: 00:34:03

Did you hear what I just said?

568

: 00:34:04

I can't lie, cheat, or steal

569

: 00:34:09

I, I could have been a top producer and,

and had all the, you know, accolades and

570

: 00:34:13

awards and trophies and I'm so and so.

571

: 00:34:16

And I see them on, on, on, on

YouTube and their videos, and

572

: 00:34:19

they tell you how great they are.

573

: 00:34:21

They're all fucking liars

574

: 00:34:24

Who are they serving?

575

: 00:34:25

They're serving themselves.

576

: 00:34:26

They don't care about anybody else other

than themselves and their own pocket.

577

: 00:34:31

Yeah, you gotta make

money, I understand that.

578

: 00:34:36

But I learned something from Zig

Ziglar years ago, you can help enough

579

: 00:34:38

people get what they want, and you

will get what you want, period.

580

: 00:34:43

I've lived by that, and I've died by it

581

: 00:34:50

I'm sorry to get off on a tangent on

today, it's just that when something

582

: 00:34:53

like that comes into my head, I just

can't let it go, and you'll find that

583

: 00:34:57

out when we do other, other podcasts

that I don't pull any punches.

584

: 00:35:04

I call it like I see it, and I can

back up everything that I will state.

585

: 00:35:12

Everything that I will make a comment

on, I can point a finger at it.

586

: 00:35:18

I can tell you when it happened, how it

happened, and by whom it happened with.

587

: 00:35:23

And when I start on that tan-

that, that trail, look out baby.

588

: 00:35:28

I am gonna be…

589

: 00:35:30

I don't have anything to lose.

590

: 00:35:32

You can't hurt me financially, you

can't hurt me physically, you can't help

591

: 00:35:35

me-- hurt me spiritually and mentally.

592

: 00:35:37

So you know what?

593

: 00:35:38

Tough

594

: 00:35:47

I don't have friends,

I have acquaintances.

595

: 00:35:50

I can name all my friends on one hand

596

: 00:35:59

Uh, I need to, uh, chill out a little

bit 'cause that just wound me up.

597

: 00:36:04

Anyway, I wanna thank, again, all of

the great doctors, nurses, assistants,

598

: 00:36:11

techs who had a hand on me literally

from, from my head to my toes.

599

: 00:36:19

Uh, you know, there were hundreds,

literally hundreds of professionals

600

: 00:36:24

who I've met these last six, seven

years who had a, an impact on me.

601

: 00:36:32

Uh, just some of the kindest people who

just came in to turn down the bed or get

602

: 00:36:37

me in bed or get me out of bed or help

me to the bathroom, help me take a shower

603

: 00:36:43

There are tons of those folks

out there, and if you'd ever come

604

: 00:36:46

across them, give them a hug.

605

: 00:36:48

Tell them thank you.

606

: 00:36:49

They don't get enough of

that, and every time I…

607

: 00:36:51

somebody would do something, I'd

just say, "Thank you for your time.

608

: 00:36:53

I appreciate you

609

: 00:36:58

Because sometimes it's a thankless job.

610

: 00:37:00

They don't hear it enough.

611

: 00:37:02

And, and I would sit there, like

I said, in the chemo room, and I'd

612

: 00:37:05

hear these nurses talking, you know,

amongst themselves about patients

613

: 00:37:09

and what the circ- circumstances

were with that particular patient.

614

: 00:37:12

I was within earshot of their,

their little work area, and I'd hear

615

: 00:37:16

conversations, and I'd look at the

person they were talking about and I'm

616

: 00:37:19

going, "Oh my gosh, that poor person."

617

: 00:37:22

So we just pray for them

618

: 00:37:26

'Cause you can't do anything else for him

619

: 00:37:32

I don't, I don't want you

to have any pity on me.

620

: 00:37:34

I'm not looking for a pity party.

621

: 00:37:38

I'm looking for strength

622

: 00:37:41

Direction, wisdom, and just

plain old moral turpitude.

623

: 00:37:50

Is that a good word?

624

: 00:37:52

Fortitude

625

: 00:37:58

Yeah, I know this started out on my

hips, but if you can't move, which

626

: 00:38:06

I could have been stuck with really

bad hips and not able to get around.

627

: 00:38:11

I am, I am, I am…

628

: 00:38:13

Like I said, I, I, I'm thanking God today.

629

: 00:38:16

I got up, I had important tasks I

had to do, went to Publix and spent

630

: 00:38:20

my proverbial $150, which came out

with six bags, going, "Holy shit."

631

: 00:38:27

And, um, came home and said, "I'm gonna

get this podcast prepared and done so

632

: 00:38:34

that I can get it posted for tomorrow."

633

: 00:38:37

And I've made my mind up how I wanna

do these things, and if you care to

634

: 00:38:44

join me along this path to listen,

to contribute, to be a part of, I,

635

: 00:38:50

I in- I, I invite you to join me.

636

: 00:38:52

Uh, you can do it remotely.

637

: 00:38:54

Uh, you can come into the studio

and come visit and sit across from

638

: 00:38:57

me and we can have conversations

639

: 00:39:01

I, I'm gonna make this wide open

for anyone who wants to talk.

640

: 00:39:07

So again, I wanna thank everyone

who's listened to me rant and

641

: 00:39:12

rave on these last three episodes

642

: 00:39:16

And those of you who are out there who,

uh, feel lost, unwanted, you're not.

643

: 00:39:26

You're not

644

: 00:39:29

Just take the time

645

: 00:39:35

to feel good about yourself

646

: 00:39:42

There is a better day coming.

647

: 00:39:45

Absolutely a better day coming.

648

: 00:39:48

I thank you for listening.

649

: 00:39:50

This is Cousin Vinny on

the Cousin Vinny Hour.

650

: 00:39:53

This is Vinny DeRosa, and I wanna thank

you all from the bottom of my heart