The Review Queens bite into a 2 Star Amazon review for Pepto-Bismol Chews and a 3 Star Yelp review for famed Michelin-rated restaurant Le Bernardin.  The Queens ponder the often overlooked, Chelsey cramps, Trey needs painted lines, and Chelsey teaches Trey about soup!

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(00:00) Bonus Podcast Announcement!

(03:07) Lodge a Complaint!

(09:24) Pepto-Bismol Chews Review

(26:26) OFFER: SuperChewer.com/Queen

(28:21) Meryl-Go-Round

(33:51) Le Bernardin Review

(52:14) My Royal Highness!

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@TheReviewQueens | @ChelseyBD | @TreyGerrald

---

Review That Review is an independent podcast.  Executive Produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound design by Trey Gerrald.  Cover art designed by LogoVora, voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky, and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.

. Chelsey Donn: Hello.

Hi everyone.

Welcome to Review That Review!

The podcast dedicated to reviewing

Reviews.

We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we

That's Chelsey Donn.

And that's Trey Gerrald!

And together we're

The Review Queens.

Hey Chelsey girl.

How's your crown.

Hey Trey.

My crown is good.

I just had a very productive writing meeting with Amy and we made some nice decisions and edits.

And I'm very excited about the direction of this next draft.

So just coming off of the excitement of that!

Yay!

To get even more excitement by being here in recording this podcast

I'm having a really good week.

You know, it was actually a little gloomy out today, which was a little bizarre.

And, um, our fire alarm batteries just started dying throughout the house,

So when you unscrew it to change the battery, an alarm goes off, which is like really obnoxious.

And then they're like not standard batteries.

Like they're like a very specific kind and I'm not going to buy them from ADT.

So I had to like order them on Amazon, you know, there'll be coming tomorrow.

Yeah, exactly.

That's occurring.

But you know, it's such a gift to be able to have fire protection.

Do you hear that, like, 'beep...beep?'

Yeah.

Yeah.

I had to deal with it.

Cause I didn't want it to show up in this recording.

Oh yeah.

Oh good point.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's a lot.

Anyway.

Well, is there anything specific that you would like to complain about?

Would you maybe like to,

Lodge A Complaint!

Yeah, I need to lodge a complaint today, as it turns

I don't know who my Complaint should really be directed to if it's just that like, I want

And I'm sorry if like our male audience has exited, but like it's a real thing.

And.

The worst thing about it is that it has, you have it, you experience it on the one hand.

You're like, okay, thank God.

At least for me, it's like, I PCOS.

So I'm like, oh, I'm healthy.

It's coming.

Like, I'm, I'm grateful, but like I'm in pain and it's annoying.

And I have to know that if all things go well, like if everything goes, according to

I just don't think we talk about it enough openly.

It's just like amongst girlfriends, you're kind of like, Ugh, can you believe this?

This is terrible.

The worst cramps.

And they're all like, I understand, I hear you girl.

But I think globally let's have this conversation because women were just walking

But you know, it's real.

So I'm lodging a complaint.

Well, You know, I have a friend who has 'P-COS' as well.

And ... Callback!

I don't know, did we do that in the rehearsals or in an episode?

I don't know if people know about that.

I think I remember transcribing it, so I think it is in an actual episode

Oh, it's in the Laverne Cox..

Episode one, two or three.

One of those.

Yes, yes, no, I hear you.

It makes me think of, I'm not similar, but it is similar.

There is this whole culture of, female suppression, something that really bothers me.

And I think there is a comedian who has this in their thing, but it ha it is

Why are pad commercials?

Why don't they use a blue liquid to simulate the effect?

I understand red is like, like it is gross, but it's like, but we all know what a pad is for.

Like, when you change the color, it's just perpetuating this.

Shh.

We don't talk about the female body.

Like you know, there's so much systematic stuff against women that you know, it's stupid.

Yeah.

It really is.

I mean,

I'm sorry you're cramping.

Thank you.

Thank you for saying that.

Cause like, Ooh, it's been a day in terms of that.

So I applaud you for being productive today in the midst.

Yes.

If I was like in school and in gym class, I would be like, I need to sit out today.

You know, I'm not going swimming.

Anyway, that's my Complaint.

Tell us, Trey, what's going on with your life?

Okay.

So this occurred to me the moment after I closed my complaint about parallel parking.

So I'm, I have to Lodge it because it's related and, and I don't, there is no solution.

There's no way to fix the problem unless we paint slots, but I'm talking about parallel parking,

And then the rest of that side of the street goes along with fitting onto the street.

So then there's not enough spot left, but there's just a tiny little sliver.

Right.

Because if you had a motorcycle, you would be good, but the car..

Or one of those weird compacts, like two-door cars, it just, it makes

Yeah.

We don't know when the dominoes started.

It's like, did it, where are you the person in front of you?

Or they just like doing what they need to do and following along or did they start it?

So it bothers me because we have lines for parking lots.

So why don't we have lines for parallel parking?

Is it because of motorcycles and smaller size vehicles?

I mean, maybe it would be more obnoxious if like,

If there were lines?

Well also it's just, yeah.

I mean, there are lines when you're, you're when you're paying at like a pay meter thingy.

Correct.

So like, there are times in LA where you'll parallel park and there

But if it's free, it's not coming with lines.

Right.

I, so like where did that, where did that logic start?

I don't know.

I don't know what the solution is, but it really,

I wonder if it's just cause there's all different sizes of cars parking, you can

And I do think that it is an issue that only arises in ginormous cities, where

Like that drives me crazy.

Yeah.

Like it's the worst when you're circling or when someone's like, what about that spot?

And you're like, I don't know how, like, how am I supposed to just put

oh, it's going to be a fire hydrant.

And then you walk in, it's not, it's just small.

A small spot exactly.

Or hate when it's just like a little bit too small, but whatever.

The worst.

All right.

Well, I do feel better that is out in the open and I think Chelsey.

We should jump into some online reviews.

I think we should jump into some online reviews.

That's a great idea.

Let's do that.

So as you guys already know, thank you for listening in again, we

We each bring in a review from the internet that we feel needs to be inspected.

We read you the review, we break it down and we rate the impact of that review

Assess That Kvetch!

Alright, you're first, today.

Okey dokey pokey.

Take it away, RQ!

...just warming up for Meryl-Go-Round just in case I have to do Opera Diva later.

I don't know if my stomach can handle this.

You can handle this, Trey.

You got this!

Review, That Review.

All right.

Today I have a two star review from amazon.com.

This is for Pepto-Bismol!

Yes.

From AmazonCustomer.

I know, I wish they had like a name name, but they don't.

That's what the name is.

All right.

I'm fine with it, I guess...

Okay.

And this is for the Pepto-Bismol Chews.

K.

I've been using there for about two months and I noticed the areas of my teeth that

I've always had extremely white teeth.

My dental hygienist is religious.

I am extremely upset that my teeth have been stained now.

No amount of scraping brushing or white strips seems to improve it.

I also tried discontinuing use of the product for two plus weeks and no luck.

This seems like grounds for a lawsuit to be perfectly honest.

I literally don't know if my teeth will ever go back to normal or how long it will take.

Meanwhile, I go around like a fool with white teeth and black spots between my teeth.

I will upload pics once I charge my phone.

two out of five stars.

Too chewy and flavor is nothing special, almost like a M and M except Pepto flavored.

three out of five stars.

Earlier today, I tried to put one of the bottles in my pocket while I walked out the car to work.

I had to take them out because of how utterly loud and annoying the rattling noise was.

I even tried putting a paper towel in there to stop them from moving.

Didn't work.

So now I just put a few chewables in my pocket.

If you sweat or move a lot, this starts to degrade the physical integrity of the chewable.

I can't speak about the chemical integrity of the product actually working.

They seem to do something at least to help an upset stomach.

they should be paying me after I stained my beautiful white teeth, which I

I don't even know how to get my teeth back to normal, what an absolute nightmare.

Dash dash dash And no, the stains are not from something else, such as diet or over brushing.

I have done dental slash hygienist shadowing as I am applying to dental school.

So I have some knowledge of the field already.

Wow.

I feel like the dentist school was a plot twist.

I know!

Did not see that coming from AmazonCustomer.

AmazonCustomer.

AmazonCustomer.

Wow.

Have you ever had Pepto-Bismol chewables?

I think they have, are these the ones that are Starburst, like, or

I'm so glad that we're clarifying this.

Yes, because these are actually in a clear plastic bottle and they do look like pink-colored Mentos.

It's not the like pop out of fibers.

No, no, no.

There's a different one where they're like in like those classic, like aluminum foil,

the chalky ones,

this is not chalk.

This is like a Pepto-Bismol

mento

mentos.

Yes.

Now this is where I'm confused.

First of all, like very, I'm going to say right off the bat, in terms of effort.

Well, first of all, did they ever upload the pictures?

I'm guessing no.

No, they never, they never did upload any images.

So I guess their phone is still uncharged.

Okay, well, that removes a little bit of my trust from, from

However, what makes AmazonCustomer a candidate for Review Queendom is the fact that in the

And they talk about the taste.

They, you know, they give the nod where the nod is due.

They talk about the travel experience, the value, a lot of, a lot of

So I, you know, I, I know, I I'm wondering, I chuckled at the sentence,

So are they saying that...

...they're hasidic...

...they visit exactly.

Are they saying that they visit the dental hygienists religiously

Not only are they amazing at doing a scaling and a cleaning, but they pray over the teeth as well?

I mean, I took AmazonCustomer to be saying that the dental hygienist is religious

OH, interesting.

Okay.

A third, third interpretation.

But it is an odd sentence structure.

Yeah.

I mean, this is where I got confused.

I think so if this happened to me, you know, me, I'm the, I'm the daughter of a dentist.

I'm very OCD about my own teeth.

And so if I was using a product and it turned my teeth black or gave me like

I get it.

However, The part where I was a little lost is then they're talking about travel

And I'm wondering, where are we in space and time?

Like, is it that you used to put them in your pocket and travel around?

And as soon as you realize this was the issue, you stopped using them altogether,

That was my question too, because they say I tried discontinuing

How many, how often do you have to take Pepto-Bismol.

Oh, this is something you take every single day of your life.

If so, I think you need to see the doctor.

Well, that's, that's where I think there's a little bit of confusion in this Review

I like, I've been trying as in, like, it's been two and a half weeks where I've

Right, what is the actual timeframe here?

Right.

Or is it that I took off two and a half weeks and then figured, well, it's not taking them away.

So I might as well continue use the product.

Like I I'm a little confused.

It is confusing, especially because they go into the breakdown of

So,

So is it that we need an edit to like the order of events a little bit more so that

No, because it says I tried discontinuing use of this product for two plus

I tried to put one of the bottles in my pocket.

Okay, that's ridiculous!

So they went back to using it again.

That's insane.

And then they wrote the review after going back to the product today,

Right!

Okay.

This does not, this review, this review just plummeted.

In value.

It's like, they were like, so upset about looking like a fool with

And then they like took a break and then they're like, I really just need

So then they tried to put it in.

It was too rattling and loud and they're like, that's it.

I'm going on Amazon.

Cause I am AmazonCustomer.

Wait, what do you think of the fact that they tried to put this bottle in their pocket?

And it was rattling because it's little Mentos things inside of a plastic bottle.

Yeah.

Like what else is this was, but I love that they, they had options.

Like they tried the cotton, you know, they tried to do things to remedy

Like if I have this bottle of Tylenol in my pocket, it would be rattling around all over town.

Yes.

So do these lozenges.

And so does Altoids.

It's like everything,

Everything rattles!

Even change in your pocket rattles,

Yeah.

We're rattling all the time.

We're rattling right now.

I'm also, I want to acknowledge the, um, the grammar is

Flavor.

And then travel about like, that's an interesting, and then it has like the

And no, it isn't because I'm gross, but there are a lot of spelling problems here.

I was going to say.

It sounded like in the beginning there were some errors where there were some sentences that...

Well, I'm glad you said that.

Cause literally the first word of this review is I've and it's just spelled IVE.

No, without the apostrophe, but, but there was this bear.

There was like a, 'there' yeah, that was wrong..

Let me read it again.

Yeah.

I've been using there for about two months and I noticed the areas of my teeth that

What?

Yeah, that whole sentence needed a full rewrite.

Like what is it that I, so I really have to read between the lines and say

Or these, I think.

or these.

Yeah.

For however long.

And now you're noticing that the residual powder, which comes off the top of the mento

that's what's causing black.

Yeah.

The residual pink powder that is coming off of the mento is getting in between your

brush your teeth like immediately after you use it then.

I don't know.

Why are they leaving this around.

Do they not floss?

But then, this is 'on the go.'

Oh, right, true.

You can't brush immediately.

Do you think they're being truthful?

Like, do you think this is actually occurring?

I'm sure that products, I think, you know, everybody's teeth, uh, like biology's

And then if we do that, then we are leaving the tooth a little bit more susceptible to staining

So.

But they're saying it's the crevices between, which is so weird.

I do appreciate the sentence.

Meanwhile, I go around like a fool.

This is where I feel for that for AmazonCustomer.

I feel for AmazonCustomer with like, that was like my thing, you know, like like a

Like that's like everywhere you went, all people would say is like,

You have the best hair.

You're the best, whatever.

And then all of a sudden that's taken away.

And I think that emotion of that loss for AmazonCustomer is really

And I think that that's clouding the Review a little bit here and maybe clouding the logic

Maybe we shouldn't continue using this product.

Yeah.

Do we think that this really is coming from this or do we think there's something else

I really think amazonCustomer wanted to jump the gun on that question

I mean, can we ever be super certain.

I don't think so.

I, I just think like the main place where AmazonCustomer loses me is

Like if I ha and they give it what, two, two stars,

two out of five.

Yeah.

So if I had such a negative experience with the product and I was 1000% confident that

I certainly would never use that product again.

And so the fact that we, AmazonCustomer is continuing to use this product.

It does make me question the way that they're explaining this and whether it is in fact as big

And like you said, Ideally Pepto-Bismol is something that you take every once in a while

Long-term a little more regular.

That being said.

I just think it's sus.

It's very sus to continue to use a product after it's done this.

And if that's not true and the timeline is shifted, then AmazonCustomer has left me confused.

I mean, I think I can count those.

How about you?

I think I can crown it.

Yeah.

Okay.

So Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and in an effort to

The Queens are Tabulating.

You ready?

I'm ready.

Total Score!.

Oh, interesting.

Okay.

I am holding up two and a half crowns and Trey is holding up three and a half crowns.

I gave AmazonCustomer two and a half crowns because of the intrigue I now have about this.

Like, I'm going to go ask my dad about this and see if I need to be

So for that, you've definitely piqued my interest.

Also, you're a Queen in the sense that you broke everything down and you had

I thought that was cool.

Uh, where you lost me.

I feel like you almost, AmazonCustomer, have a pumpacity, a pompousness

Um, I think you're really throwing that in the reviewers face.

Like I want you to know that I go to the dentist all the time.

I'm in dental school.

I'm okay.

Cool.

Cool, cool, cool.

Cool.

Like, chill, the person that's reading this Review doesn't really need all that information.

And I think that we could get our message across in a more clear way.

Also.

Of course we lost points just for spelling grammar and that whole universe.

And we also lost points.

Cause I'm confused.

I'm I don't know.

I don't know if I can trust you or not, AmazonCustomer, one because you're living in

You're hiding behind AmazonCustomer.

I don't know who you are.

And you're telling me things that don't really add up.

So I'm a little suspicious and that's why I'm giving you two and a half crowns.

How about you, Trey.

Why three and a half?

I did three and a half because I think there is an impact here for me.

Like I think that I would just stick with the chalk version chewables rather than these be

Like I, I took two and a half off.

Nope.

I took one and a half off because I don't know.

I feel like I do feel like we might be missing a little something to the story here.

And they're just so protesting so much about dental knowledge that it makes the, a little

I get that these are chewables on the go, but, um, obviously if you take a bottle and

So like, I don't, I don't think that that's specifically like a knock against this product.

So for that reason I gave it three and a half.

Nice.

Good review!

lots to, lots to chew...

...chew on...

lots to chew on!

We said the same thing.

Lot's to chew on there, Trey.

Love it.

All right.

So let's take a quick break.

And when we come back, we can get into Chelsey Donn's review!

Can't wait.

BRB

Hold your crown.

We'll be right back.

Chelsey and I are so excited to share this exclusive Review

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Weew-weew-weeew!

It's Game Time!

It's time for Chelsey and Trey to play One-Star-Zingers on the Meryl-Go-Round!

Here's the deal now I'm not going to do it.

Cause I can't do that to you guys.

Trey and I have each picked a rotten, scathing, pithy One-Star-Zinger and with

Just like Queen Meryl Streep who does it all!

Before the clock runs out.

And I'm going first.

I really like saying that so fast.

I don't know why, but okay.

It just feels very game showy.

Like I feel like game show you always, they always like include a final phrase that they it's like

Results not typical.

Right?

Exactly.

All right.

So my one star zinger is from Walmart and it is a One-Star-Zinger

They very small not how they look on the picture.

Uh, how many are there?

...not how they look on the picture.

Three,

Oh, okay.

All right.

Are you ready?

I am.

What am I strapped into?

Tonight you are strapped in, on another Florida animal,

Tick Tock.

What does Florida?

Alligator Alley?

It's an alligator.

Okay.

Either way it could be in Captain Hook.

I just always think of like the clock.

Yes.

Right?

Exactly.

All right.

So let's do this.

3, 2, 1,

GO!

WWE.

They are very small, not how they look on the

picture.

Lifetime.

They very small, not how they look on the picture, what that was being news.

They, there, he smells not how they look on the picture.

Teen drama,

televangelist.

Very small, not how they look on the

picture.

You got five my Queen.

Okay.

Good job!

I feel like diminishing returns for me, but here we go.

That's okay.

What did you bring in?

Okay.

I found this, uh, for the hometown episode, but then I went with the boil

So this is a One-Star-Zinger from Amazon by Adam D.

This is for the Heinz Carolina Mustard Style, sweet mustard, barbecue sauce, and

wait, sweet mustard, barbecue sauce?

You know, barbecue sauce.

Like if you're a Southern style, barbecue sauce as mustard base.

I didn't know that.

And the normal barbecue sauce is like ketchup based.

I had no idea.

That's a thing.

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

So there you go.

So Heinz started making a Southern style.

Interesting.

Okay.

And Adam's subject is bleck, B L E C K, exclamation mark.

And then his rev Adam's review is bleeh.

No, no, no, no.

And bleeh is spelled B L E E E E H.

So that the subject is bleck and then the review is bleeeeh.

Wow.

What diversity in one Review!

Adam.

Good.

Where you are strap.

I have you strapped into like a Florida orange.

Yeah?

So sweet and yummy.

Yeah.

I think that would be a good look for you.

Plus I just feel like you're someone who could ride round things, obviously like the eight ball.

It makes me think of that episode of Top Model.

Okay.

Yes, exactly.

It's exactly like that!

All right.

I'm trying to get a podcast record with this review.

So get ready.

Get your fingers ready.

And I'm going to try to be as acting style, Meryl as possible.

We are bringing Meryl into the room with us.

Okay.

I'm on my, my orange

Get strapped into your orange!

3, 2, 1, GO!

Game show.

No, no, no, no.

Yankee?

No, no,

no, no

opera diva

mellow drama.

No, no, no,

no.

Oh my goodness.

Let's see how you did, Trey.

I don't think I got, I don't think it was a record.

It's not a record, but we tied five and five!

Is that the second time in a row we've tied?

And we tied on the live.

Oh my God.

We've been tying lately

We're SO in sync!

So Fun.

Are you going to devour me?

Review That Review?

At least we're having fun.

That sound kinda scared me in real life.

I'm glad.

All right.

So we're back from the game break.

And now it's, Chelsey's turn.

Chelsey girl.

Where's your review from this week?

So glad you asked.

Okay.

So my Review!, it's a little unusual, you know, I usually bring in the one star reviews,

This is a three star Yelp review written by Mark M for the restaurant, Le Bernardin.

This review was tough for me to write and it might even be tougher for you all to read.

Oh, I wanted to love this place.

I really did.

And while the food was nothing short of amazing.

The service here left a lot to be desired.

You see, you always hear about how great the service is in fine dining, especially so at any

So cold.

I walked in on a weekday afternoon for lunch.

I wanted to have a seat in the lounge.

I didn't have a jacket on this trip and I knew the dress code for the lounge did not require one.

Mind you.

I was dressed just fine for the lounge.

I wore dark jeans, black dress shoes, and I had on a collared long sleeve

When I approached, who appeared to be the maitre D, I asked if I could have lunch in the lounge.

And he looked over the lounge, which was completely empty and said, 'sure.'

The wait staff did not smile.

It honestly didn't seem like they were eager to assist me with my menu choices, filling my

The only other party in the lounge consisted of three young women who

Throughout the meal, the maitre D and several hostess type people would look

Needless to say the entire meal felt very awkward.

And if it wasn't for the amazing food, I might've even walked out!

Anyways about the food.

Le Bernardin has always been lauded as this Mecca of seafood.

Many people have said that Le Bernardin is North America's best seafood restaurant, is it?

Yes, it is.

Le Bernardin is literally the best seafood restaurant that I've ever been to.

Every dish was flawless.

I started out with the hamachi tartar.

The hamachi was so fresh.

The fish had the perfect texture and mouthfeel, the slice cucumbers added a nice bit of crunch.

And the lemon citrus emulsion brought the right amount of acidity.

The dish was very balanced and it ate well.

Next up was the salmon.

I don't know for sure.

If the method of unilaterally cooking salmon is an Éric Ripert signature, but I was

The salmon in this dish was easily the best two pieces of salmon I've consumed.

The texture was so unique.

I didn't know, salmon could even feel or taste this way.

The vege, pea puree, and sauce, in this dish was also quite memorable.

Even months later, I can still remember everything about the dish.

I added the lobster cappuccino simply because-

EWW!

I added the lobster cappuccino, simply because I heard

When it arrived at the table, I was a little sad because the dish itself was quite small.

It only seemed like three small sips in the tiny cup, but after I took the

The dish was so incredibly rich and fragrant.

There are pieces of perfectly cooked, lobster hidden away-

EWWWWWW!

in the cup.

And the entire thing was topped off with slice pieces of black truffle, which for the time of

All in all, this was another perfectly balanced dish!

For the finale, the tres leches, which consisted of sphere of cashew sponge cake, Clementine

The dish was a stunner in both appearance and in flavor.

You can tell they had their pastry chef tirelessly working in the kitchen to make this one right.

A triumph and a great way to end the meal.

Ultimately, a flawed service in a restaurant with flawless food.

Would I returned to Le Bernardin?

Perhaps...

and with a little bit of hesitation.

This is the best Review for us to both read considering neither of us ate fish.

I'm not even confident that I pronounce some of those things correctly.

I feel like I just am like a one note person when it comes to wait staff.

Yes.

But?

Okay.

I just need to acknowledge my, cloudedness here because I want to be a little objective, but I

I hate it.

I hate fine dining.

I hate Zagat.

I hate Michelin.

I hate it.

I hate it.

I hate it.

Hate it.

And this review perfectly encapsulates the pretense around food.

Right.

Okay.

But, okay.

What, okay.

Let me just let that go.

Let that go.

I also feel like Mark, I feel like Mark is insufferable to be around.

Like, first of all, this is a lunch shift!

In the lounge!

And you're in the lounge.

So like, if you were working at this fancy, fancy restaurant, you're not working the lunch shift!

Right.

Like the people that had the lunch shift are newer hires.

First of all, second of all, lunch is lower priority.

Okay.

It's still is business.

So whatever, but like calling this cold and distant.

I think, is just like a stretch.

Also, like you went, you were there by yourself and you're like staring

So they like, like, it just is like, it's awkward because you're being awkward, Mark!

Super awkward, Mark.

Yeah.

And then this whole conversation about what are you wearing?

I knew I didn't have to have a jacket.

I know!

So, I wore dark jeans and I wore a button down shirt.

It's like, so gross.

I don't care.

Who cares?

Who cares what you're wearing?

I know.

Oh my Goodness.

Also that never had any...

There was no pay off, right?

It wasn't like I was dressed really nicely.

And they told me that I needed to leave because I wasn't dressed appropriately.

Like they just wanted to let us know what they were wearing so that we

But like this whole conversation about like, I is this truthful.

I imagined that this really?

Yes.

I imagine this happened to Mark.

Right.

Like the value here for me is like, because no one asked you, "how's your day going?"

Right.

Like, get out of here, Mark.

I, it's not my responsibility to ask you how your day is going.

If I'm over here serving you lobster cappuccino, like yes.

Be pleasant.

Everyone has, but like to like leave a three-star review because someone

I think it's just beyond the pale.

I agree.

I mean, at least they did three and not one or two.

I mean, I think it could have been a four let's take a notch off for-

I think so too!

I think this should have been a four star review because like,

They're just having pause.

They said this was the best, months later.

They're still thinking about this meal and at the end of it, would they go back?

Yeah, probably with a slight pause.

So it's like that to me is a four-star review first and foremost, Mark.

And second of all, like, ah, just again with the pretension, you know?

I mean, there are people that are foodies and that would be down for

So that's the one, cause I know you're like sort of averse to that and I just want to flip that

So,

But the point here is that this review is a glowing review about all of those,

Correct.

Yes.

Right.

And that's why I just think it should be, four-star not five because there's nothing

There's only something bad about the staff, which I don't know at the end of the day,

Like hire better people, train your staff better.

Tell them to interact better.

I don't know.

Sometimes Michelin star rush.

Sometimes you, you go to one and they're just so nice and you feel like, wow, that was amazing.

And sometimes they're a little bit colder, but I really do think that a lot

It made me wonder, like how long was Mark there for?

Was he there for several hours?

I feel like Mark might've been lingering.

And, Mark had multi courses.

I mean, they had a dessert and they had a cappucino.

Yes.

Well, the cappuccino, while I think that's a very weird name for the dish is more of a soup.

See?

Okay.

That I actually wrote down dish.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think the lobster.

Yes.

I mean, my impression of the way that they're describing, and I know you were like,

So they ended with the soup course before they had the dessert.

Emulsion.

The word emulsion.

Ugh.

I recognize that people have different qualities than me.

So I do want to, once again, just say, I recognize that I have a bias, I'm trying to let go of it.

Right.

And to that point, if you're going here, Like you're paying top dollar and you have

But if you're, I don't know, again, like, I don't want this to be like

It almost seems like he wanted to go there, but he couldn't, I don't know if

So he did the lounge instead.

Well, I'm curious now how Michelin, what their roster is, because

Also.

I always thought that these really fancy, fancy restaurants didn't serve

Anyway.

So to me, I feel like I would not hang this on my fridge, but I guarantee you that

And so they, the make grandmother probably will put this on the fridge.

Yeah, I, it just is a little like, um, cur phenomenally too.

It's a little fluxing as a little.

This is all a little.

Messy to me, because it seems to me that they had an amazing restaurant

And so they wanted to give you both sides of the story and they just went with three stars.

But I think what that actually does is it damages the restaurant because

They get a middle of the road review.

But it's like, I think it's, like you said, this is a comment card to the manager.

This is like, I did not get treated well, and I'm dropping lots of money and

I mean, here's where I will counter for a second.

So when I go on Yelp, especially for restaurants, something that I do a lot, if I was like, I

and I will just type in lobster cappuccino.

Now, if I was doing that, Mark's review would come up specifically highlighted the portion

And for that alone, I just think I can't, I have to give him a little bit of credit.

I do think he explains the dishes well.

He lets you know what you can expect.

He obviously wants the person reading this review to know that he has an understanding of food and

So I think there's a little bit of value there.

Mmhmm, and I appreciate them giving like the opposite as well, like sort

I do think that is valuable.

It isn't just decimation.

Yes, exactly.

And also I had an LOL moment though, like at the top, when he was like, this was really tough

No, that bothers me.

That bothers me.

I mean.

So pretentious.

Yeah, like, so pretentious.

And also it does bring up the point that you made, which is that I think Mark had been planning to

All the, like, looking at them seemed very odd.

Yeah.

Like I smiled at them.

I looked at them.

I like, like, it's just, it's strange.

They, yeah, it's a little crazy.

I'm sorry, Mark.

But it's, a little creepy.

I'm ready to crown this.

How about you?

Uh, I feel conflicted.

Okay.

I'm ready to crown.

Okay.

The Queens are Tabulating.

You ready?

Yes!

Total score!

So I'm holding four crowns and Chelsey is holding three and a half.

Now I chose four because I do think that the impact for me on this Review!

is that it might be not the best location for lunch.

Yeah.

And also don't expect like, Cheers, Cause I don't think everyone's going to

Something that really bothers me with Mark's Review!

is that I think Mark has a little bit of a control issue where they want things from other people's.

If you want the waiter to ask how your day is going, ask the waiter, how their day's going.

Right.

Or, I don't know.

I recognize you want high customer service because you are patronizing

I give mark four crowns because I think that they work sort of queenly and they're yinging

I do have an opinion now about the restaurant and certainly about Mark.

So I gave four it's a solid review.

Chelsey.

Why did you do three and a half?

I did three and a half.

I took the extra half, off because I really just think this should have been a four-star Review.

I think this was a four star review.

It for me probably would have been like a four and a half, four.

I would have taste still taken off at least a half crown to a crown for the attitude.

Cause I don't, I don't love it, but everything else.

He really explained the dishes really well.

I can imagine people that are wanting to go to this restaurant and wanting to look up

Uh, and he didn't slander the food.

He was very specific not to slander the food.

And so I appreciated that.

I just think mostly this is in the wrong category for me.

So that was why I did the three and a half.

It's interesting.

I, I wonder how often three star reviews get overlooked, even in my experience,

It is interesting.

I love your whole thing about searching specific phrases, but there is something

Yeah.

I mean, I, I often won't see a three-star review unless I do search for

it's like, Would Mark just be a really hard grader if he was your professor.

Probably like, he was probably someone that just gives everybody really bad grades.

And that's why this

And he'd have no decorations in his classrooms.

But stark walls

Yes.

Yeah, exactly.

But you better smile at, Mr.

Mark.

Anyway.

This might be more incentive for me to go there on lunch.

Cause I don't want to be bothered.

Like I don't want to get into a conversation with my people.

Right.

Like, don't talk to me.

So maybe that's like the New York coming out, but like whatever.

Very interesting.

I'm glad you brought in three.

I love this.

We should start doing more 3s.

Yeah.

I think we need to start mining.

The three is, cause I think there might be some gold there.

Just saying.

What a great episode.

We had a one, we had two ones.

We had my two-star and your three-star!

Yeah!

We're diversifying you guys.

So, that just means all of you listeners have to leave us five stars.

And we'll just forget about fours because Mark's was actually a four.

So everyone leave us a five star review.

Yes.

That's what it means, because math and we're both very good at it.

Exactly.

In chronological order.

Yeah.

All right, Queens, we've reached the most Regal portion of our show.

Who are you, Trey, inducting today for

My Royal Highness.

Okay.

Today I am going to induct all of the Amazon Prime drivers.

Yes!

I don't know if you have noticed this, but I have definitely

I see UPS.

I see FedEx, and I see Amazon Prime.

And I know that this is like an indication of the time and culture that we're in

Which can get a little controversial, but I want to induct all of the drivers

I will get them in our garage, which is key delivery.

They have like the access code and then I'll also get them on our

They just have so much work and it's like, the volume is every single day.

It's just crazy.

And especially, you know, Given everything in the climate going on with health, we've really

And I really do appreciate everyone going out there and like, I mean, it's just

Like it's just, it must be such an interesting job.

That's very busy.

So I want to induct all of the Amazon Prime drivers for making all of our lives

For that reason, Amazon prime drivers, you are My Royal Highness.

I Love that we are always so in sync.

I was literally driving today and seeing a bunch of those They're more like vans.

They are, yeah.

And I was like, Ooh, I need to add them to my list.

Oh my gosh!

Oh, that's so funny.

Of course we do that.

And also I wanted to tell you I'll save it for patron, but I wanted to tell you a

If the dogs do that.

Anyway, we'll get back to that later.

So

Chelsey, who are you inducting for My Royal Highness today.

So today I am inducting Brené Brown.

Why?

Because I love her.

Also, I really would like to make hashtag Trey and Brené a real thing anyway.

So that's separate issue.

The real issue is I just love Brené Brown.

If you guys are listening, you don't know who she is.

She is a shame and vulnerability researcher, and then she takes all of the data that she acquires,

Shame and how certain elements of our childhood or whatever it is affect us in

But she does it in an amazing way where she, she just doesn't make you feel like your wrong or

She really, oftentimes puts herself into the circumstance and makes herself

Like that's what it sounds like when she's, when she's telling you the stories of this book, like

And that balance is.

It's like a chef's kiss.

It's so good.

And sometimes she'll talk about that.

Like, I could never be the scientist shame researcher who couldn't curse and like,

No, there's not, but I couldn't be authentic to myself if I wasn't doing that because that's a

And because Brené is able to show up as that, she really gives us access to herself and her

Otherwise, we wouldn't hear it if we were just listening to it, no

But if we were just listening to some humdrum lecture about this, we would

But because Brené is working it up there and giving us stand up comedy while also teaching us

And I'm just so grateful.

And honestly, when I feel lonely and I'm driving.

I turn Brené on just cause she's amazing company.

So guys, if you don't already listen to Brené Brown, you got to do it.

All right.

I love you, Brené.

Can we be friends?

Hashtag Chelsey and Trey and Brené.

All right.

Love you.

You're My Royal Highness.

Brené Brown.

She, she is one of a kind.

I mean, there's a reason.

She is the best!

Love her.

All right.

My Queen, we did it.

That is another round on the RU a RQ Ferris Wheel.

Thank you guys so much for joining us today.

If you like, what you heard, will you do us a favor and please tell a friend, even just you

It would mean truly the world to Trey and I.

Ditto.

And if you don't like us, please tell an enemy and a post about it.

We would love for you to join our mailing list, to stay up to date

If you are not already on the mailing list, we currently are running a Newsletter Exclusive

So make sure you've joined so that you can, be up to win the bottle because it's gorgeous.

And there's only four in existence and Chelsey and I are the other two.

So we're only giving one away.

So.

You can basically be like me and Chelsey.

I mean, who doesn't want that?

Visit ReviewThatReview.Com to join or click the link in our show notes below.

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We so badly want to hear from you.

It's probably my favorite thing about the show getting to hear from you guys and hear your

So please call us at 1-850-REVIEW-0.

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Obviously.

Bye!

Bye Yall!

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Review that Review!

is an independent podcast.

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Executive Produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound design by Trey

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