Shownotes
In this episode of Boomer Banter, Wendy Green sits down with Merilyn Simonds as she shares her heartwarming and enlightening friendship with the incredible Beth, who just happens to be 105 years old!
heir weekly walks over the past five years have blossomed into a treasure trove of stories, laughter, and life lessons that Merilyn lovingly chronicles in her book, "Walking With Beth: Conversations with my 100-year-old Friend." This isn't just a book about aging; it's a celebration of friendship, creativity, and the beautiful journey of living fully at any age. We explore how Beth, with her zest for life, continues to inspire Merilyn and everyone around her, proving that age is just a number when it comes to pursuing passions and staying engaged with the world.
Merilyn recounts how their friendship blossomed during the pandemic, a time when connection felt more important than ever. Their conversations sparked deep reflections on life's challenges and joys, and we get to hear how Beth's perspective on life has shifted the way Merilyn views her own aging process. With humor and warmth, they discuss everything from the joy of art to the little things that keep us grounded in the present. Beth's approach to life—embracing creativity, staying active, and cultivating relationships—offers listeners a refreshing perspective on growing older.
As they meander through memories and lessons learned, Merilyn emphasizes the importance of keeping a forward-looking mindset, something Beth embodies. They touch on topics like how to find purpose in retirement, the significance of passion, and the necessity of surrounding oneself with positivity. This episode is for anyone looking to inject a little joy and inspiration into their lives.
Takeaways:
- Aging with intention means staying curious and engaged with life.
- Friendship can blossom at any age, as shown by Marilyn and Beth's inspiring walks.
- Living fully into your hundreds is about finding passion and nurturing it every day.
- It's essential to keep an eye on your health while also focusing on what brings you joy.
- We don't need to let age define us; instead, we can redefine how we view growing older.
- The stories and experiences we share with others can help us cope with life’s challenges.
Links referenced in this episode:
- merilynsimonds.com
- amazon.ca (the book is not available in the US, yet.)
- Take the What's Keeping You Stuck quiz
This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis:
OP3 - https://op3.dev/privacy
Transcripts
Hello and welcome to Boomer Banter, where we have real talk about aging well. I am your host, Wendy Green, and every week we talk about the challenges, the changes and the possibilities that come with this season of life.
And today we are exploring what it really means to live fully all the way into your hundreds. When I first read the book Walking With Beth, I expected a story about longevity, about reaching 100 and beyond.
But as I turned the pages, I realized it was so much more. It's a story of friendship, imagination and resilience. It begins with curiosity and joy, then it gently leads us into vulnerability and acceptance.
I found myself smiling and reflecting, yes, even sometimes worrying about both Merilyn Simonds, the author, and Beth, the famous Beth, who she's walking with as they faced the realities of aging. Thankfully, both are well today, and we have the privilege of learning from their extraordinary story.
Merilyn Simonds is the internationally published author of 22 books, including the novel the A New York Times Book Review Editor's Choice and the Canadian classic nonfiction novel "The Convict Lover", which was a finalist for the Governor General's Award.
Choice Non-Fiction Award for:It's an innovative memoir biography of Louise de Kiriline Lawrence. I hope I said that right. An extraordinary recluse who changed the way we see birds. Merilyn Simond's latest book is a memoir.
It's called "Walking with Beth, Conversations with My Hundred Year Old Friend." And it was recently released by Random House Canada in September. And it's the book our conversation is going to be focused on today.
So let me welcome Merilyn to Boomer Banter. So nice to see you.
Merilyn Simonds:Hello. Lovely to see you too.
Wendy Green:So I want to start at the beginning and I want to start with, like, what inspired you to get started on these weekly walks with Beth? And were you both in good health at the time?
Merilyn Simonds:We were, yes. And are. So I, I was turning 70 and not being a birthday person, I'd never really cared about, you know, 21, 30, 50, whatever those landmarks were.
70 seemed different to me. My mother died at 75, so I thought, well, you know, what is this? What is this next phase that I'm going into and what does it look like?
What does it terrain look like? And the year I turned 70, Beth turned 100. We'd been friends for, I don't know, maybe 40 years and, but we didn't see each other often.
We would, we would email periodically and bump into each other. We weren't sort of regular friends, you know, we were, we were in the same, in the same loop.
So I called up Beth and I said, do you want to have a visit? And she said, well, it's Covid, you know, we should go for a walk. So we put on and we went for a walk and talked about everything under the sun.
And at the end of the walk, she said, wow, I think we should do this again next week. And I said, I think so too. So Wednesday at 3 became our time. And it's just, yeah, we haven't stopped.
Wendy Green:And you haven't stopped. And that was five years ago.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah, that would be five years ago.
Wendy Green:Wow.
Merilyn Simonds:Five years in a row. Yeah.
Wendy Green:Amazing. So before we get into the beauty of this book, I am curious about the through line of the books you've written. So I said 22 books at the beginning.
But this Walking with Beth is your 23rd book, right?
Merilyn Simonds:You know, I should go back and count again. I'm not sure, you know, you're very focused on the one in front of you. I'm certainly in the 20s.
Wendy Green:Okay. All right. But I'm, I'm curious about what captures your interest enough to write a book like kind of what's the through Line?
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah, it's, you know, it's, it's interesting because my books aren't premeditated and I don't, I'm not a writer who labels herself as a fiction writer, non fiction writer, memoirs, etc. I don't stick to a genre. I write about whatever comes in front of me and snags, you know, my interest.
But if I look back at it, I think, I think almost all my books in, in one way or another are interested in very ordinary people who have something extraordinary to say or who are doing something extraordinary. The first, the first one in that literary line was the Convict Lover.
And that was the story of a 17 year old girl in the little village outside the walls of a prison who starts a correspondence, you know, throwing, throwing notes over the wall, you know, with, with this convict.
And nobody would ever know that she existed except for this book and except for me finding her letters and his letters in the attic when I moved into Kingston.
Wendy Green:Wow.
Merilyn Simonds:But also in, in a New Leaf, which was my garden book, a neighbor down the road was a master gardener, you know, not, not, not the technological master gardener, but he was a fabulous Gardener, especially with roses. And he taught me how to, you know, how to sharpen my tools, how to take care of my tools.
He had a, he had an approach that was really, really interesting to me. And again, he, nobody would know about him.
And Gutenberg's fingerprint was Hugh Barkley, who, his weird, wonderful human being who was in his 80s when I met him. And he had restored a 19th century press and was printing books by hand. And so that book is about me printing a book by hand with him.
Wendy Green:Oh, wow.
Merilyn Simonds:And at the same time developing it as an ebook with my son, who's a digital book designer. So, so it was, you know, that it was kind of the perfect trope for thinking about the strange place we're in right now.
You know, that, that paradigm shift. And so, and Louise was another one. And, you know, off in the woods, nobody would have ever known she existed. And it's the same with Beth.
I mean, Beth isn't, you know, she's not going to make headlines, but she is a person that I really would love people to know.
Wendy Green:Yeah, yeah, that's, that's makes a lot of sense that through line.
So, Marilyn, one of the lines that struck me early in this book was your conversation with Beth when you two were talking about the artist Hokusai and that he had a vision for the next 30 years. And Beth responded, "so do I". And she was 101. So what does that even mean to have a vision for the next 30 years if you're 101?
Merilyn Simonds:Well, I think what it means is that you live very much in the moment and she doesn't feel, and she doesn't seem to me to be any different than a 20 year old or a 50 year old. You could easily say, you know, at 50, I have a vision for 30 years.
We find it odd in 100 year old, but I think it's just a way of saying she is still forward looking. So many people when they, even when they hit 65 or 70, they start being backward looking, right?
They're looking at their accomplishments, they're looking at, at things they did at a younger time and finding joy and satisfaction in that, but they're not looking ahead.
And I think the people who have the most satisfaction as they, you know, enter their later years are people who are always, you know, looking ahead to a phone call, to a meal, to working on a piece of music or a piece of art or whatever. You know, it doesn't matter what it is. It. What matters is, is the focus. Right?
Wendy Green:So it's Looking ahead to something to look forward to. It's not necessarily 30 years ahead, but it's just something to look forward.
Merilyn Simonds:Exaggeration.
Wendy Green:Right. But I loved how she said that, you know, because she obviously looks forward to things in her day.
Merilyn Simonds:Yes.
Wendy Green:And I, I, I, yeah, that, that's how she meant that. I think you're right.
So as you said, you know, so many people after they retire or they hit a certain age, they, they start to think, well, and now what? You know, what am I going to do?
And, and you wrote, "when a person has left the working world and all its must dos, the garden plot is still calling, says, come weed me, please water, look at me now." And I love that metaphor. And so how did you, and how do you encourage other people to discover a purpose when their to do lists fall away?
Merilyn Simonds:Well, I guess my to do list has never disappeared. I mean, writers, and I think artists in general don't have as much difficulty with this. Right. I mean, we see writers.
Edna O' Brien wrote Little Red Chairs when she was 88. Margaret Atwood is 86. She's on tour right now with her new book. You know it. Roger angel, baseball hero, you know, columnist in, in the New Yorker.
I mean, he wrote his last column when he was 101. Right. I mean, when you're in the arts, you are naturally constantly stimulated by new ideas and new projects.
You know, you finish one project and I, I know some writers say, okay, that's it. I'm not writing anything else. But most of us, you know, we just like the next idea comes forward, say, okay, me next. And, and yeah, yeah.
Wendy Green:And I think that people that aren't artists can, can still use that metaphor. You know, like you can grow a garden, you can cook a meal, you can creatively play with children.
You know, there are things that you can do to stimulate that looking forward and that being stimulated.
Merilyn Simonds: has somebody that's Monday at:So she's always looking forward to someone visiting or calling. And, and especially in the winter when, which is, can be quite a lonely, isolating Time for older people.
But she has all these phone calls lined up and you know, it's not just a pleasure of chatting with somebody, it's parachuting into someone else's world. Right. Which is an act of the imagination.
It keeps the imagination alive and keeps you living in the present and keeps you alive to the world, which I think is really, really important.
Wendy Green:I think it also takes your mind off of your own stuff. Pains. I'm tired, Whatever. Now you're talking to somebody else. And like you said, parachuting into their world. That's a great phrase.
Use that in your next book. I know, that's why you're a writer. Beth also said if people would just listen to their soul, they'll find the solution to anything.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah.
Wendy Green:And that's not like in a religious way. So what does that mean to you? To listen to your soul?
Merilyn Simonds:No, I mean Beth is not woo, woo at all. Right. Or religious or any of that.
So Beth believes, and I, I think she's right, that all of our experiences accumulate inside us, often inside our bodies.
My sister is a physiotherapist and she says when she works on a person and on a muscle here or there, sometimes people just start crying or they'll start laughing. I mean they're. That we store things in our body, but we also store, store them in our intellect and in our, in our emotions and in our heart.
We, we know this.
But she has taught me, and I, I was never very good at this, that when someone asks you to do something or when you have an idea to do something, pause and, and your, your, yourself, I guess is the best way to say it yourself will answer the.
Whatever the question or the dilemma or the invitation is, and it will answer in a way that is true to you and your history and your needs of the moment.
Wendy Green:So rather than just always saying yes or always saying no.
Merilyn Simonds:And I always say yes. Right. Somebody says, oh, sure, I'll do that. Right, right.
And I'm trying to pause and say, well, is that right for me right now, Beth is a great, you know, best started as a, as an occupational therapist in, during the Second World War and she ended working at 99, working as an art therapist with veterans returning from the war in Afghanistan who were suffering from ptsd.
So she's done a lot of therapy in her life and she's not heavy handed about it, but I think, I think that's part of her, you know, her toolbox is to listen to herself. Yeah.
Wendy Green:And so as you went on these walks and you started to pick up this bit of wisdom from Beth. When did you two together decide, oh, we should make this into a book?
Merilyn Simonds:You know, I'm not sure exactly. I mean, in the writing of the book, I make it sound like it was right away, but it. It wasn't really. We. Beth is a writer, too. Did I say that? Beth is.
Wendy Green:No, you didn't say that.
Merilyn Simonds:But she.
Wendy Green:She.
Merilyn Simonds:Her first book in her 90s, and. And one of the times we became quite close was that I helped edit that book with her.
And then she published another book at 100 called "My Journey to 100". And right now at 105, she's getting ready to publish her third book. It's all finished, working with the designer. Okay, so Beth is a writer by nature.
She takes note. Makes notes on everything. So she was making notes, I was making notes. And at one point, I don't know who said it, we.
We kind of stopped in the middle of a walk and said, you know, this should be a book. And whoever said that, the other person said, yes, it should. You know, because her. Her real.
You know, her motivation in saying that was that people need to understand passion and developing passion as a way of. Of living later years to their fullest. And my motivation was that, oh, my goodness, I want people to know Beth.
You know, I don't want to be the only one hearing all this great stuff. I want other people to. To. To have a portrait of her. I don't see it as a memoir so much as.
As kind of a portrait of Beth and Portrait of a Friendship because, you know, she's worth knowing, right?
Wendy Green:Yeah. Yeah.
In fact, one of the things that I remember that she said in the book was kind of about her, what she thought her obituary might say, speaking about passion. And she said, in order to live and love as many years as I have, you must have passion, many passions.
Merilyn Simonds:She says, well, yeah, it doesn't have to be one. You know, I mean, my sister, who is a physiotherapist, developed photography, and she's fantastic. Another sister became a jazz pianist. I mean, it's.
And. And actually, after reading this book, my third sister wrote to me recently and said, well, I've been inspired by Beth, and I started drawing again.
And. And she. She was quite a wonderful artist when she was younger. And so, you know, sometimes we dig deep in. Into our interests of the past.
Sometimes it's something completely new. It doesn't matter. You know, as best as the. What doesn't matter? It's. It's. It's that it is a passion. It's something that moves you deeply because.
Wendy Green:She came up with some very interesting creative pursuits. Do you want to tell us about some of the stuff she was doing?
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah. So that first Covid winter was very hard for many reasons. And so she has this big, big old fashioned dining room table.
In fact, it was her father's dining room table. And so she. She started collecting all kinds of bits and pieces.
Colored paper, twigs, stones, beads, you know, just any little bits and bobs she had around. And she had a friend cut. Cut these sort of, you know, about this size pieces from very thin plywood.
And she would sit down at her table without intention. She would sit down and she'd sort of look at all these things and gradually bring them over.
And she'd create a collage on that little piece of plywood. And she'd take it over beside the chair where she likes to sit, to read in the.
In the living room, and she would look at it over the next few days and enjoy it. She'd take a picture of it and then she'd go take it back to the table, dismantle it and another one. So these are completely ephemeral things.
They're just for her. And they're. They're fantastic. And then at some point, I don't know when some point in our time together, she decided to start making stamp paintings.
So I gave her my old stamp collection. A lot of people, my vintage collected stamps as kids. Wayne, my husband, collected stamps. We had all his mother's shoe boxes full of stamps.
Wendy Green:Oh, gosh.
Merilyn Simonds:Military. So there were stamps, like from all over the world. And so Beth cut the. Did not remove the stamps from their backing.
Cut, trimmed the backing so it was really small. Had these large panels. Like the biggest one, I think is about 4 by 4 by 6ft. And.
Wendy Green:And 4 by 6ft. Huge.
Merilyn Simonds:It's huge. And she started gluing like she heaped up the pant plants. Sorry, the stamps by color.
And then she started using those heaps of colored stamps, like paint and. And creating these most beautiful stamp paintings. I mean, who knew? Right?
Wendy Green:Right.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah. I love that. Yeah. Yeah. And. And she has. She. So this the. The first one that took, I think, two Covid winters.
And as she says, they saved her through Covid winters.
But she donated this big triptych to the post office in the village where she spent all her summers from the time she was born until she was in her late 70s. And of course, they were thrilled to have it.
Wendy Green:Of course.
Merilyn Simonds:And now they Have a lot of visitors who come just to see that Triptych
Wendy Green:Vintage. So vintage is another word that she used. Instead of saying I'm old, she would say she's vintage, which I love that she's very careful.
Merilyn Simonds:And. And I've done, you know, I'm on tour right now, so I. I've done quite a few events.
And one of the things that keeps coming up is how older people trash talk themselves, you know, like, oh, I'm old. I couldn't do this. Or what can you expect? You're 75. Or, happy birthday, old fart. Right. I mean, we don't need to do this.
We are at the same stage, I think, in thinking about older people that society was at in the 70s, thinking about women and about people of color. You know, we have to expunge our vocabulary of all of these, you know, denouncing negative terms. And I just. I just think it's so important. And.
And Beth has been my teacher in this. She refers to herself as a woman of a certain age, A woman of my vintage.
Wendy Green:Vintage.
Merilyn Simonds:She doesn't, you know, she doesn't go around complaining, I'm so old.
Wendy Green:Right, right.
Merilyn Simonds:I mean, when she turned 100, she said. She said, what is this number? And then she turned, you know, 103, and this year, 105. And now people flock to her because she's.
Because of that number. And what. I think we don't want to be treated as women, you know, as. Because we have breasts. We want to be treated as people.
We don't want to be treated by the color of our skin, but we also don't want to be treated by the texture of our skin or the number of years on our birth certificate.
Wendy Green:Right.
Merilyn Simonds:We want to be treated as people.
Wendy Green:That's so true. That is so true. And I think it's a. You know, it's. It's women and men. I think that this ageism has become a real problem. And we do it to ourselves.
You know, we.
Merilyn Simonds:That's the issue.
Wendy Green:Exactly. We do it to ourselves. And you say, you know, don't resign, adapt. And, you know, we're not old unless we give into being old. Right. Old is.
Merilyn Simonds:Our life from the time we slip out of the womb. Right. We are. We are aging. So even think, you know, talking about aging is. Is a weird, weird term. And we adapt our whole life.
We have so many things, especially women, to cope with. Right. Getting our period, losing our period, you know, going through the drought of menopause and, you know, all of Those things and.
Okay, it's not great. Okay, you have aches and pains and, but why focus on that? Right? We don't. Right.
Wendy Green:So. But I do want to talk about some of the challenges that you have had.
You know, like, you had this very painful condition while you were working on this book. Beth has lost two of her children and her husband. And yet you both remained resilient. You kept living.
So like, what is that secret sauce that has kept you both moving forward and being optimistic about what's to come?
Merilyn Simonds:You know, I don't have like a recipe to impart to. People say, do this, that and the other thing, and you can get through this stuff. But I've always been a glass half full kind of person. So is Beth.
I have a pretty great ability to ignore my body, which gets me into trouble lots of times as well. But when you're really sick, it's, it's, it's kind of a good skill to have.
I did things like, I, I refused to have anything negative around me, so I did not watch the news, I did not watch mysteries or crime thrillers. I, I was sure that all the images going into my head were positive and, and contributed to my well being. And I think that's really important.
One of the things I've learned from Beth is, you know, she says if she starts to go down into one of those dark places, she just says, beth, don't go there. And she goes, does something else. Yes. And even in our conversation, she, you know, organ recitals are not for her.
She does not want to be, you know, moaning and groaning about the state of our health. We, we didn't do that at all. I mean, she, and if we did it in even the tiniest way, she would say, okay, let's, let's talk about something else.
Wendy Green:But Marilyn, you got to a point where, I mean, you were losing your vision, you were in so much pain that, that this 103-year-old woman was driving to pick you up to go for a walk. So, I mean, how did you.
Merilyn Simonds:Right, right. It was, it was just such a role reversal. But it was, I put that in the book.
Not, you know, not to tell people how, what a bad shape I was in, but, but, but to illustrate friendship and how friendship has no, no age limitations to it. Right. I was in need and, and my friend stepped up and, and she took me out for picnics because I couldn't get out otherwise.
I couldn't see, I couldn't walk. I had medication induced dementia. Like, it was just, you know, really awful. I'm fine now, everybody. I'm fine.
Wendy Green:I know. That's why I said in the opening I was worried about you as I was reading the book.
Merilyn Simonds:Well, and, and I should say what it was because a lot of people have this illness and I was on a chat group online for a while. A lot of people get very discouraged. So I had Giant Cell Arteritis and it was hell, no doubt about it.
But, you know, got good medication and I came out the other side. You never get rid of it, but you go into a kind of remission. And, you know, it. It meant a lot to me to have Beth and her positive attitude around me.
And I. I think, I think if you aren't naturally positive by, you know, by your regular nature, then I think surround yourself by positive people, positive, positive television, positive movies, positive books, you know, and I don't mean necessarily self help, because sometimes I think self help books can make you feel inadequate. Right. Stories that are. Stories that are. That tap into the goodness of human, of human nature.
Wendy Green:Yeah, yeah. I think there's a. There's a lot of wisdom in that, that surrounding ourselves with positive people and the messages we take in.
I know anytime I do get distracted and see a news flash, I'm like, oh, I don't want to hear that. Because it just. It spins you up. And it's.
It's kind of one of those things that I think we talked about in the beginning, or maybe we talked about it before it came on the air, that if you can't do anything about it, then why let it take up space? You know, why worry about it?
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah, you can, you can be informed without being obsessed, right?
Wendy Green:Yeah.
Merilyn Simonds:And then, you know, I mean, there is a part of the book, the book is written in, in all these very, very short sections. I think there's 75 short sections, and the longest of them is called What We Carry. And it's a section where I go through.
You know, Beth was born in:And then it's the two of us going forward through all these things that we've lived through. And it was just. It was. So we both were adamant to keep that in the book because, you know, Beth. Beth lived through the rise of Hitler.
You know, Beth lived through the Red Scare, the communist witch hunt in the 50s in the States. You know, she lives through hard Times. You know, I grew up in the middle of the. All the assassinations in the late 60s.
Wendy Green:Right.
Merilyn Simonds:I mean, and the Vietnam War and that devastation that lasted for 22 years. And, you know, every generation, I think, I hear. I hear my kids and grandkids say, oh, yeah, but you didn't have it as bad as we're having it.
Every generation thinks that. That what they're growing up in is the worst.
But the truth is, every generation has their own stuff to deal with, you know, and it helps to know history.
Wendy Green:Boy, that's for sure. That's for sure. And I.
You know, what you just recounted is part of what I started this whole podcast around, is that we grew up with those things, and they've kind of shaped us into who we are. And I think we feel like we can still matter and still make a difference.
In fact, there's a quote that you use from Carl Jung, and he says, "the afternoon of human life must also have a significance of its own and cannot be merely a pitiful appendage to life's morning".
Merilyn Simonds:Isn't that the best quote? And he wrote that in what, 19, 30, 33? Something like that.
Wendy Green:Amazing.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah. And I think that's true. We have to stop thinking of these as the waning years. Yeah.
We may not have all the energy we had 10, 15, 20 years ago, but, you know, keep moving, keep thinking, keep loving, keep laughing. Right.
Wendy Green:Keep.
Merilyn Simonds:Keep alive. Stay alive to the world.
Wendy Green:Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.
Merilyn Simonds:And Beth is just such a poster girl for that.
Wendy Green:But she's aware that she's become famous for being, you know, 105. Right. And. And you. And you said to her, but you're not famous because of that. You're. You're an icon of possibility. You've lived and you are living.
Merilyn Simonds:Yes. And that. That's, you know, I know other people who make it to 100, but it's hard to say that they're living, you know, they're kind of existing.
And I don't. I don't want that. I don't think most of us want that, do we? You know, we. We want to be living.
Wendy Green:Well, I mean, as long as you're here, you know, it's better to be living than to just be taking up space until.
Merilyn Simonds:Until we're dead, we're living. So.
Wendy Green:Right.
Merilyn Simonds:Right. Just as well make the most of it. Right.
Wendy Green:Amazing. Yeah.
So towards the end of the book, Beth reflects on what she imagines her obituary might say, and I did say some of that, but she also, besides the passions, she Also says exercise every day, be nutritionally aware. And laughter. I do love to laugh. So does she still, like, make her own food and is she still exercising every day?
Merilyn Simonds:Yes.
So when I first met her, she was standing against a wall, you know, shoulders, heels against the wall, and she would stand like that for 15 minutes to keep her posture. And I have to say she has the best posture of anybody I've ever met. And she walked with firmness, like, With a firm step like anyone else. She.
No shuffling for this lady. And now she doesn't do that. Now she stretches. So she has a whole series of stretches that she does every day.
And she walks at least a couple of kilometers every day, which is like a mile.
Wendy Green:Even in the winter.
Merilyn Simonds:Yes. Yep. As long as the weather isn't too cold because, you know, nothing works exactly the way it did in the past. And so she has. She has to be careful.
Not. If it's too cold, she can't breathe properly.
Wendy Green:So.
Merilyn Simonds:But if she can't walk outside, she makes laps inside her house. And just, Just to.
Wendy Green:Yeah, just to be clear, I don't think we mentioned that you're in Canada. So. So Beth and Marilyn are in. Vancouver.
Merilyn Simonds:It does get very cold. So she has been a vegetarian since she was in her 40s. So for what, 65 years she's been a vegetarian. She bends it a little bit. She does.
She does sometimes have bone broth now, because she needs the protein. She's, you know, at. As you age, you. You lose muscle quite naturally, and so you need more protein.
Older people tend to eat less protein, but they should be eating more protein. And so she does that. But she, you know, she doesn't smoke, doesn't drink.
Never has she has a woman come in every Thursday to cook meals under her direction and freeze them. And, you know, so that. And. And then. But she makes all of, you know, she cooks everything herself and stuff.
Yeah, no, she, you know, and I, I have to hold back from saying still. I. I want to say still every time I, I talk, you know, she's, you know, still cooking, still living on her own. Still. Still, still, you know.
Wendy Green:But she wouldn't like it if you said that.
Merilyn Simonds:No, I don't think so.
Wendy Green:Yeah. And that goes into that whole image that we have of, you know.
Merilyn Simonds:Exactly.
Wendy Green:Old is. And so if you're still doing it, then you're still, you know, and it.
Merilyn Simonds:Kind of implies the best before date. Right?
Wendy Green:Yeah, yeah.
Merilyn Simonds:And. And there isn't a best before date, you know, if, if you feel creaky in the Mornings. Maybe.
Maybe you need to exercise more instead of sit and complain that you feel creaky in the mornings. Right. Or. Or move to Mexico where it's hot and dry.
Wendy Green:Move to Mexico, which is what you do in the winter.
Merilyn Simonds:It's. It's. I have, I have hard to manage asthma and, And a lot of arthritis. And boy, you get off the plane in Mexico and the arthritis disappears.
Disappears. And so does the asthma.
Wendy Green:So the arthritis, too.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah, it's a very. Oh, it's amazing. You could. You kind of forget. You kind of drop 20 years. It's great. Yeah.
Wendy Green:So do you see yourself living into the hundreds?
Merilyn Simonds:Oh, I have no idea. I really have.
Wendy Green:30 years. Come on. That vision.
Merilyn Simonds:Well, I mean, I am constantly thinking ahead, but I don't think in terms of birthdays. I don't have the genetic background to have that expectation. Think if I, you know, if I was around for another 10 years, I would be.
That would make me happy. But I'm sure once I get to 85, if I'm still writing, I'll think, well, why not 95? Oh, why not 105? Right? I mean, you.
I mean, when you were 50, did you think about how long you were going to live? I mean, you don't. Right? You just. You, you. You make plans a certain amount of time ahead and hope for the best. Hope you don't get hit by a bus.
That's right.
Wendy Green:Yeah, that's right. Oh, that would be quick, hopefully. Yeah.
Merilyn Simonds:It's good. I personally, I. I'm voting for, you know, a heart attack in my sleep. That's. That's what I would.
Wendy Green:Quick, no pain. That's done.
Merilyn Simonds:My grandmother died that way. You know, she went to sleep and didn't wake up and. That's lovely.
Wendy Green:Yeah. Yeah.
Merilyn Simonds:But do we have enough time that I can mention one more thing about Bath?
Wendy Green:Yes. Was there anything you wanted to read from your book?
Merilyn Simonds:Oh, we talked about this, didn't we? And now I've come.
Wendy Green:Yeah, we don't have to.
Merilyn Simonds:I. I do like to read from it. Yeah, I'll. I'll read this little bit. Yes, I. I know what I'm going to read. Okay. Sorry, I was. I was just momentarily.
Wendy Green:I know we were having too much fun talking.
Merilyn Simonds:Too much fun. It's true. Where is it? Sorry, I just have to find it.
I want to read a section that kind of shows Beth's relationship to art because that's so important to her. Okay.
Wendy Green:So this is the book Walking with Beth.
Merilyn Simonds:Walking with Beth. This section is called the Empress of Radical Happiness. Beth is coming to visit.
I can count on one hand the friends who have stepped over our threshold in this first year of of pandemic isolation. But Beth is vaccinated, and so am I. Neither of us is symptomatic, but we test anyway. Negative.
Our excuse for defying the public health stay at home order hangs on the wall.
In the depths of our first winter in Canada in more than a decade, my husband and I bought an enormous painting of San Miguel's distant desert hills by Katharine Bruce, a Canadian artist who works in Mexico half the year. I spotted the painting the first time we visited Catherine's house.
The image was inspired by the view from her rooftop terrace and by the cactus garden outside her studio. For me, the painting is Mexico. The color. Beth exclaims the minute she enters the room. The energy of those lines.
She reaches to touch the filaments of electric blue, white gold, and hot pink that flash across the canvas like carnival streamers. And look at this, I say, gently laying my hands on her shoulders and swiveling her to face the opposite wall. She gasps.
Meet the Empress of Radical Happiness, I say. The oversized Huipil, created by our San Miguel friend Lena Bartula, is part of a series she based on the iconic Mesoamerican blouse.
Huipils are still worn by village women throughout Mexico and Central America.
The cloth is typically hand woven and embroidered at the neck and down the front, the one on my wall is a collage of found fabric, scraps of cloth and lace stitched here and there with bright pink and turquoise threads, and at the neck a golden fringe that might once have held back a theater curtain. Our great extravagance, I say to Beth. Oh no, Beth protests. Not extravagance. I believe this is essential. Her belief in art is absolutely profound.
And I think I mentioned she was an art therapist in the second half of her her life.
Wendy Green:Yeah, yeah. And that's what's part of what's keeping her going now, I think, is all of her art, her creativity.
So listeners can find you on your website, Merilyn and and that's M E R I L Y N Merilyn Simonds S I M O N D s dot com but as we found out, Merilyn, the book we can't buy from Amazon in the U.S. right? You have to go to Amazon.CA that's right.
Merilyn Simonds:In order to buy. Yes, I at the moment there's just a Canadian publisher, not an American publisher.
Wendy Green:And when I looked just a few days ago, it was sold out.
Merilyn Simonds:So it is it, you know, it it's an instant bestseller. It hit all three bestseller lists, a national bestseller list in the first week.
And it's been, let me see, it's been out for one month and it's sold out and it's, they're doing a second printing, so it should be available quite soon. Well, and there's.
Wendy Green:And it's also an Audible, you said, right?
Merilyn Simonds:Yes, and I, I did the narration for the, for the Audible book, which it was great fun and I think works quite well. And I should say that there's a lot on my website, too.
There's a page for this book and you can hear a conversation between Beth and I that we recorded last summer.
Several excerpts from the book reviews, lots of interviews and, oh, and a little documentary about The Book, a 20 minute documentary that was made by CBC Radio. So all of those things are on the website. So there's, you know, lots to look at while you're waiting to receive your book.
Wendy Green:I know, and everybody is going to love this book. I, I absolutely fell in love with it.
I have friends in Canada that saw that documentary and they were like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're talking to her. But I think what, what makes Walking with Beth so special, that it's not just a story about aging.
It's a story about friendship and connection and creativity and possibility. And, and that you and Beth remind us that aging well isn't about avoiding decline. It's about choosing to stay engaged with life in all of its beauty.
Merilyn Simonds:That's really, really true. It, it is, it is intentional. It's a choice. Yeah.
Wendy Green:Yeah. And if Beth were sitting with us today, what do you think she'd want our listeners to remember about living not just long, but, well?
Merilyn Simonds:She would say find your passion and cultivate it. Yeah. Yeah. That's what nurtures her. That's what, that's what keeps her going.
When, you know, her daughter died during, during our time together and, you know, she's had, she's had lots of setbacks.
I, A very close friend of mine died last week and, you know, you have these setbacks, but as long as you have a passion, a way to enter yourself deeply, you can, you can get through anything.
Wendy Green:Yeah. And a friend, you have to have a good friend, too.
Merilyn Simonds:And a friend can remind you those things.
Wendy Green:That's right. Merilyn, thank you so much for this really rich conversation and for sharing Beth's story with us.
I really hope that everybody can get a copy of this book as soon as it's available again. But remember, Amazon.CA or audible.CA.
Merilyn Simonds:Yes.
Well, thank you so much and thank you for the, for this podcast that you host, which I think is part of the change in attitudes towards those latter years that, that we need. That we need as a, as a culture and as a society to undertake.
Wendy Green:Thank you. That's. That is definitely my intention is to help change our mindsets about it and listeners. Be a good friend and share this episode.
Tell people about the Boomer Banter podcast because the good information that we share here is not as helpful as it could be if we don't let others know about it.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah, share it with your friends.
Wendy Green:Share it with your friends. A little blurb now from me. You were made to thrive, no matter your age, just as we heard.
And if something's been quietly holding you back from that full, vibrant life you dream about, I have got something special for you. It is the What's Keeping You Stuck Quiz.
And if you take it, it's a very short but eye opening quiz that's designed to help you discover what might be slowing your momentum. Because as we discussed, sometimes you lose that passion. You forget what it is that keeps you excited and motivated.
So once you take it, you'll get five personalized emails with encouraging tips and powerful resources to help you step into the life you know that you are meant for. Because the best is not behind you. It's possibly ahead. https://bit.ly/NotStuck-Renewed
And try the quiz, see where you might be stuck. It's kind of fun. And Merilyn, I wish Beth was here so I could thank her too. Thank her for us.
Merilyn Simonds:I will. I will. And I'll. I'll send the link so she can watch it.
Wendy Green:Oh, good.
Merilyn Simonds:Yeah.
Wendy Green:And thank you all for tuning in. All of you that listened live with us and all of you that are listening on the podcast, thank you so much and I will see you next week.
Merilyn Simonds:Thank you. Bye. Bye.
