Tommy James and Big Money Eddie put on their hazmat suits and wade through the radioactive mess that was the Alien Earth finale. Spoiler alert: it sucked. From limp storytelling and cardboard “character arcs” to the ever-present fingerprints of corporate greed, our boys dissect how Hollywood once again proved it can milk a franchise until it’s bone-dry. Along the way, they chew over the role of horror in the Alien universe, gush (and gag) about the beauty of the xenomorph design.  In the end, the lesson is clear: if you’re a Hollywood writer, maybe stop writing like your audience has the memory span of a goldfish.