In today's episode Bryan and Tracy discuss "vulnerable narcissism" - a sense of superiority and inflated self importance in order to hide deep wounds of inferiority and fear of rejection. Like an addict, narcissists feed on the supply of affirmation and attention to feed their ego. When that ego is threatened, narcissists go on the attack in order to protect themselves from being “found out” or faced with the reality they fear most-they aren’t good enough.

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Five Things about Vulnerable Narcissism: 

1. Core Features: Vulnerable narcissism is characterized by a combination of narcissistic traits and a tendency towards vulnerability and insecurity. Individuals with vulnerable narcissism may display self-centeredness, entitlement, and a constant need for validation and admiration, while also experiencing significant self-doubt, hypersensitivity to criticism, and feelings of shame or inadequacy.
2. Mask of Fragility: Vulnerable narcissists often present themselves as fragile and sensitive individuals who require special attention and care. They may appear modest or self-effacing on the surface, but underneath, they harbor a deep-seated need for constant affirmation and reassurance. This mask of fragility can be manipulative, as it elicits sympathy and support from others while maintaining a sense of superiority.
3. Avoidant Coping: Vulnerable narcissists employ various coping mechanisms to protect their fragile self-esteem. They may engage in avoidance strategies such as social withdrawal, passive-aggressive behavior, or excessive fantasizing to shield themselves from potential threats to their self-image. These individuals may struggle with criticism or failure, often perceiving them as personal attacks rather than opportunities for growth.
4. Covert Grandiosity: Unlike the overt grandiosity commonly associated with classic or grandiose narcissism, vulnerable narcissists manifest their grandiose fantasies and desires in a more covert manner. They may engage in daydreaming, idealizing others, or seeking special treatment while downplaying their own accomplishments or achievements. This covert grandiosity serves to preserve their fragile self-esteem and maintain a sense of superiority without drawing attention to themselves.
5. Relationship Dynamics: In interpersonal relationships, vulnerable narcissists often seek out individuals who can provide them with the constant validation they crave. They may become dependent on others for emotional support and have difficulty empathizing with their partner's needs. This can lead to a cycle of idealization and devaluation, as vulnerable narcissists oscillate between adoration and resentment when their expectations are not met. Ultimately, these relationship dynamics can be challenging and emotionally draining for both parties involved.