Shownotes
On this episode of "Hey, Boomer!" host Wendy Green explores the rewards and challenges of grandparent-grandchild travel. Joined by guest Barbara Klocko, they share personal stories, discuss changing parenting styles, and highlight the importance of intergenerational connections. Discover the joys of exploring the world with your grandchildren and the valuable lessons that come from these adventures.
Episode Overview:
Wendy and special guest Barbara Klocko discuss their experiences of traveling with their grandsons on a Road Scholar Windjammer Cruise, the value of intergenerational relationships, and the impact of changing parenting styles on respect and manners. They also touch on the role of being a mentor or best friend in life.
Key Insights:
1. Grandparent-grandchild travel creates lasting memories and strengthens the bond between generations.
2. Grandparent-grandchild travel gives you the opportunity to learn about each other in a fun, safe environment.
3. Intergenerational connections bring vitality and a sense of youth, fostering mutual growth and understanding.
Funny Story:
Wendy shares a humorous incident during her trip to Mammoth Cave when she accidentally took a flash photo, scaring her granddaughter, Gracyn. The unexpected flash in the dark cave was definitely not part of the planned adventure!
Sponsor Information:
This episode of "Hey, Boomer!" is brought to you by Road Scholar, the non-profit leader in educational travel for Boomers and Beyond. Explore the world, expand your knowledge, and connect with like-minded individuals. Visit roadscholar.org/heyboomer to learn more.
Social Links:
- Join the Hey Boomer Private Facebook group for discussions and a safe space for like-minded individuals at facebook.com/groups/heyboomer.
- Follow Wendy Green on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn
- Reach out via email at wendy@heyboomer.biz
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Podtrac - https://analytics.podtrac.com/privacy-policy-gdrp
Transcripts
Well, hello, and welcome to the Hey Boomer show. The show for those of us who believe that we are never too old. To set another goal or dream a new dream. My name is Wendy Green, and I am your host for Hey Boomer. And today, as you know, we're talking about grandparenting, grandchild travel, and I wanted to tell you a story about the first grandchild trip that I took, was my grandparenting, Grayson, and she was only 10 at the time. And we went to mammoth cave in Kentucky And if you've never been there, it is a national park, and it's it's pretty amazing that this is one of the, if not the largest cave system in the country, maybe the world. But, anyway, we're we're maneuvering following the guide through this cave, hearing all the stories about what's in the cave and how they used it during the civil war and and we made it through fat man's misery, which is a very narrow passageway, and we made it through tall man's misery, which is a very short, low passageway and we got to a place in the cave where the guide said, okay, I'm gonna turn off the lights so that you can experience how dark it is deep down here in the cave, but I will turn on my flashlight but please no flash photography. So at this point, Grayson is hanging very close holding onto my hand, like, oh my gosh. What's coming? The lights go out. He turns on his flashlight and I hold up my phone to take a shot. I was sure the flash was off on my phone, and the next thing I knew, big flash at Grayson, jumped like 2 feet back. Let go of my hand. Like, I don't know who this person is. So, you know, traveling with grandparents can always be a challenge for grandchildren, but but we survived, and it was a great it was a great trip. My guest today is Barb Claco, but before I bring her on, I wanted to tell you about some of the Rhodes Scholar opportunities because you know that we love Rhodes Scholar, and they are my sponsor. So the one I wanted to talk about was road scholars floating campus programs at sea. And these programs are fully chartered learning adventures at sea designed to feel like a college campus experience. So there are 7 different experiences including sailing around and learning about the Greek aisles. Voyaging among the wonders of Iceland or floating down the Mississippi for a music and Mississippi tour. So if you'd like to learn more about what road scholar has to offer, you can go to road scholar.org/ hey Boomer. Don't forget the slash hey Boomer and then search floating campus, adventures. And you can learn all about what other trips besides the 3 that I mentioned. So that's rhodescholar.org/habumer. The other thing I wanted to do was invite you to the Hey Boomer Private Facebook page. That's where we have good discussions and where we come together to share stories and inspiration and ask questions and and have quotes of motivation and poems that people share. And it's a safe place where you can go with like minded people at the same age category that we are and, you're not being bombarded by all the other Facebook noise. So if you'd like to join our private Facebook group, you can just go to facebook.com/groups/ Hey Boomer and ask to join, and I will be glad to let you in. Okay. So with that, I am going to bring Barb on and read her by a little bit about her so that you can meet her. Hello, miss Barb. Hi there. How are you? I am good. I'm so excited that we're doing this show together.
Barbara Klocko [:I know. I know. You know, it was one of those things. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We'll do that sometime.
Wendy Green [:And here it is. Here it
Barbara Klocko [:is. Sometime.
Wendy Green [:It's sometime. Right? It's 5 o'clock somewhere. It's Jimmy Buffet used to say. Alright. So Barb philosophy is to live with courage, confidence, and commitment, and to inspire others who achieve beyond their expectations. I just love that. Woven through her life's journey has been a focus on education and all aspects of society. Barb started as an art teacher in a rural Michigan community. And during those 32 years, she taught art served as a high school assistant principal was a director of special education, a director of community education, an elementary school principal, early education program director, and director of administrative services. And she finished up her PhD as she was retiring. So from being president of her first grade class to testifying in Washington DC on pay equity. Barb has always focused on helping people to find the best in themselves. She served as president of Michigan Business And Professional Women's Foundation for 8 years and on the Michigan Education Trust Board of Directors. Her recent foray into education is as a 10 year track professor at Central Michigan University where Barb has made significant contributions to the literature regarding the importance of educational leaders finding their voice. She has taught just about every course in the doctoral program and the doctoral curriculum, but her favorite has been philosophy. And I wanna finish up with Barb's telling me that she's not an advocate of having a bucket list because she believes the limits that limits you to things that are on the list, but she never would have put be on a podcast. On the bucket list, and yet here she is. So with all of that, you can see why Barbara and I hit it off so well. Thank you for being here.
Barbara Klocko [:Well, thank you for inviting me. It was, quite an experience and, I'm not sure, you know, when we were thinking about doing the trip. I'm not sure I had any sort of expectations. Did you?
Wendy Green [:Yeah. That's interesting because This was my 4th one, and I do. Yeah. I I think and, you know, if if my mother's listening, she'll tell me always late to disappointment, so don't have expectations. But I do have expectations when I go on these trips, and I think the expectation is to to build memories, to have that one on one time with them, to get to know them as individuals outside of, you know, their parents who are kind of always monitoring the relationship. And maybe for them to get to know me, you know, and I don't know that that's an appropriate, but but I think it was in some ways. You know, I do want them to know me.
Barbara Klocko [:And it's It's very different from the way we grew up and our relationship with our grandparenting.
Wendy Green [:For sure. For sure. Did you did you spend much time with your grandparents getting to know them or having them getting to know you?
Barbara Klocko [:Going to my grandmother's, well, and my grandfather's for a couple years before he passed on, was our only vacation that we took. And Yeah. It was dad had 1 week off of work, and we'd leave on Saturday night after after work. And that was our vacation was going to her and just, you know, she never I think she came down of for a period of time at one time, but, you know, people didn't take vacations back then. It wasn't a or or maybe it was just our family, or maybe it was just vacations were thought of as, as privilege. Mhmm. Mhmm. And Yeah. And the working the working class just didn't do that.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. My experience was a little bit different. My grandparents used to go on cruises a lot, but, you know, we lived in Miami, so it was easy. To hop on a cruise. They didn't have to take a plane or anything. So they were going cruises a lot. They did take me one time when I was fourteen, and it was really a terrible experience, which I don't really wanna go into here. But It's interesting that I would want have wanted to so so gonna use the word desperately. I so desperately wanted to have one on one time with each grandchild that I made a commitment to myself that I was going to take a trip with them. And, you know, I I'm certainly not a rich person, so I couldn't do, like, these big I know people that take their kids to wherever they wanna go in the world. You know, that's not what I do, but just to have that one on one time, what's really important to me
Barbara Klocko [:It's kind of strange, that just made me think of before the the kids went away to college. Or in my my son's case, he went to the military right after. After high school. And I said, what? You get a mom and me trip. You know? Wherever you wanna go within reason. And, did a a real nice trip out out west to Mount Hood for, for my oldest daughter and or for my daughter. And My son negotiated to get money for car parts.
Wendy Green [:Instead of a trip. Yeah. How did you feel about that?
Barbara Klocko [:I felt kind of relieved because he probably woulda had me jumping out of a plane or tearing a car or doing something or other.
Wendy Green [:So So if yeah.
Barbara Klocko [:And if You can't immediately. I've I've always said you can't treat kids or grandchildren equally, but you can treat them equitably because you can give them what they need when they need it.
Wendy Green [:So because you mentioned that. Like, you took Will on the windjammer trip that I took Alex on. That's where we met.
Barbara Klocko [:Yep.
Wendy Green [:But you have 2 granddaughters and you went on a trip with them this summer, but with your daughter also. Right?
Barbara Klocko [:Yes. And my sister. And your sister. Phenomenal trip. Yeah. I mean, it was great. It was still physically challenging for me because I have a real hard time walking. Like, lots of steps and stuff, but we did some. We went to a spa. We we were on grandparenting we stayed at the Grand Hotel in, McIna Island. Nice. It was it was perfect for them because it wasn't very far from their house. It was like, you know, so It wasn't a big.
Wendy Green [:You had equitable time with the grandparenting. Compared to the time you had with Will on the windjammer? You know,
Barbara Klocko [:it was kind of strange because on the windjammer, And, you know, we talk about or even in the booklet, it says make monumental memories, on these grandparenting and family adventures, which I sort of thought we'd just have more time with the kids. The kids found their own groove almost immediately. They did. And, you know, so I didn't have to worry about overstepping my bounds or saying, no, you can't do that, or I I didn't have to parent at all. I got to I got to Grandparenting, which was like, oh, yeah. Come on. Sit down. Let's have some dinner.
Wendy Green [:Remember the one time I I did parent. I I, like, I insisted Alex take a shower the night before we were going to leave because I didn't want him to be all stinky on the plane on the wheel. And and when he came up from the cabin and out, all the other kids had jumped into the water to go swimming. And I was like, oh, no. So, of course, I could be the badty. And I said, okay. Go swim. Go swim. And the water was
Barbara Klocko [:freezing.
Wendy Green [:Freezing. They didn't care.
Barbara Klocko [:No. No.
Wendy Green [:They didn't care. But that was the only time my grandparenting. Yeah. I mean, I parented on that trip. Yeah. Yeah. But you're right. And that's one of the things I do love about the windjammer. It experience is that they keep the kids so occupied and educated.
Barbara Klocko [:And get and inspired, I think. I will read you something from my journal.
Wendy Green [:Speaking of journals.
Barbara Klocko [:Speaking of journals.
Wendy Green [:While you're looking for it, I'll tell you. I always pass the kids to keep a journal when we travel. And the girls were like, yeah. Cool. Let's do that. The boys, not so much. So I would I would ask them at night. So what should I put in my journal? What do you wanna write about for today? So they would help me think about it, but they wouldn't write.
Barbara Klocko [:Okay. As we were tacking back into Carver Cove, the rain came down and the crew expertly brought us to safety. Do you ever think of safe harbor? What are our safe harbors and who do we trust to help us on our journey? There's another journey every day and another person to trust, either as a mentor or as a peer, wisdom comes from the journey. We do not bring wisdom into the journey. Lest we be disappointed and we do not find the spontaneity of discovery. Wow.
Wendy Green [:That's yeah. I never wrote anything that good in my journal.
Barbara Klocko [:Alright. I had plenty of oh my god. The food was great.
Wendy Green [:But safe harbor, who do you trust? Who's your mentor? And we were talking before we came on about the like the layers of the different generations, you know?
Barbara Klocko [:Absolutely. And our kids, our grandkids, don't really have the opportunity to know whether to trust us. You know, because they travel a lot with their parents. They're, you know, so and they they know their routine. They know that, okay, I'm gonna be able to do this and this and this. And But I think they know at the at the end of the day that we're gonna keep them safe. Yeah. And not sticky when they didn't complain.
Wendy Green [:I think, you know, we were talking about, like, with our parents and our grandparenting, You know, we never would have spoken back. We never would have treated them with anything but respect. And yet as as parents, the way we were told to parent was that, you know, give your kids choices and they they can say what they're feeling. You know, we wanted them to be expressive. And so, you know, they might say, I don't like you. You're so mean, and we'd be like, okay. Well, too bad. Still the rule. But I think it has changed through the generations where it's easier now for the young ones to make a snarky remark or you know, not remember to say, please, and thank you sometimes. And, you know, it's just different.
Barbara Klocko [:I was really impressed with the kids in how they reacted and re and and respected all of the crew members, the cooks, you know, they did I mean, they were amazing. And and they were amazing too. I mean, like I talked to Alex a little bit and I talked to I tried to talk to as many of the kids as I could you know, if you could ever catch them, not up on the on the deck sunbathing or
Wendy Green [:right.
Barbara Klocko [:But I think that they they don't have a lot of elders. Oh, elders to to guide their life. You know, some do. Some some don't, but I remember as a principal, I would get kids who were living with their grandparenting. Because their parents either kicked them out or, whatever the situation was. And it was always a very different kind of relationship.
Wendy Green [:And what was different about it?
Barbara Klocko [:I was different. I think that they felt like it was a last resort. He was getting in trouble in his school and everything. You go live with grandma And then, you know, the whole role of being a grandmother you know, I know people who babysit Mhmm. For 6 years.
Wendy Green [:Yeah.
Barbara Klocko [:And I mean, I can't even imagine that. But back in the day, and I can't and I know how expensive it is for, for childcare, but, it's still it's a very It's a very it's very different to be called on in your role as a as a grandparent or as a pseudo parent.
Wendy Green [:Mhmm. Mhmm.
Barbara Klocko [:So that's why I love this trip. Is because I could be a grandparent, and I didn't have to, you know, I didn't have to say, okay, kids time for bed getting their bunks. I was like,
Wendy Green [:I guess that was me too. I did when when they were down and where the crew slept,
Barbara Klocko [:you
Wendy Green [:know, and they and they were playing and they were loud. And I finally went went down there and said, alright, guys. We need to coming up and go to bed because the crew needs to sleep. So I guess I was being the parent on the ship. I don't know.
Barbara Klocko [:So what do you think? There were three things when I retired from my first job, my 32 years in K12. I was never going to wear pantyhose again. And I haven't. Because I don't even think they make them anymore. I was never going to use a learn clock but I cheat and use my phone because I that's not an alarm clock. It's a phone if I have to get up or something. Or I tell Dan to wake you up. Yeah.
Wendy Green [:I know because he's he's a early riser. I used to see him on the
Barbara Klocko [:deck early. He said to say hi to you
Wendy Green [:today. Thank you, Dan.
Barbara Klocko [:And the last thing was and having been in all sorts of disciplinary roles or roles. Was never going to feel like I had to be responsible for other people's behavior. And that is so uplifting that when it's not my fault. If those kids are making noise down there, it's their business.
Wendy Green [:So what do you do as a grandparenting you're one on one with your grandchild or even in the family situation, and they're doing something that you feel like is disrespectful or saying something that is just way off the wall. How do you handle that?
Barbara Klocko [:Probably kind of the way I handled it in a in a classroom, you know, you take them take them out and, you know, you don't take them out to the woodshed, but you take them out of the situation and then explain to them why it bothered me. You know, not that it was wrong or anything, but this is why, you know, when you say stuff like that, it might hurt. Or, you know, it's travel is very different because, I mean, you are your health captive Yeah. You you can't just run off and go log on, and talk to your friends. Oh my gosh. Watch this crazy movie last night. It was war war with Grandparenting kid, the grandpa was moving into into the house, Robert De Niro, and So the kid had to give up his bedroom, and he didn't wanna give up his bedroom. So he started all these pranks and everything on the in the war and then the grandpa, of course, was much better at pranks. And he was doing pranks back on him and Of course, it ended well. But, but it was as a weird movie. Yeah. Yeah. And but funny.
Wendy Green [:But funny. But whenever you
Barbara Klocko [:have more than 2 generations in a household. Or in a situation. There's so many different dynamics. Grandparenting. I went to Japan on a educator's tour. Oh, I don't know, I guess, about 15 years ago. And, the family that I lived with, they have every generation that's alive still lives in the same house. Is very common within that culture that they all live within the same house. And the kid's behavior is so different there than at school where, my gosh, they were sliding up and down banisters and It was a,
Wendy Green [:even at school in Japan, they were sliding up in it. Really? But at home, they were perfectly behaved.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah.
Wendy Green [:Interesting.
Barbara Klocko [:And they did something. Oh, they did some great things in the school. Like, The last hour of every day, they did community cleanup. So there were no custodians and there were no cooks. Or any of the ancillary staff within the school because the kids did all the big white windows. They did, it's
Wendy Green [:like Oh,
Barbara Klocko [:this is really weird. But then with once they were out outside of that, they were like,
Wendy Green [:So what about that, though? That's interesting. The different generations living together. I mean, that would be more difficult here. Do you think? I think so.
Barbara Klocko [:I think so. Did you ever have a grandparent living with you? Yeah. Oh, we didn't either. I know a lot of people who did. Yeah. But anyhow, a lot of people who say, I will not move in with my children.
Wendy Green [:Right. Right. But I do think that we experience that, or at least I can speak for myself, that there is, and this is why it's so important to me to have the one on 1, there is a barrier, and that's called the parent or my children, between me and the grandchild. You know? So Let's call it a quote here. A filter. Okay. It's better than a barrier, but I feel like there have been times where you know, they'll they'll correct me. They'll say, mom, you shouldn't say that, or mom, don't do that, or mom, you know, we don't need to talk about that. I'm like, I I get and my, you know, maybe this is my failure that I take it personally to a certain extent of saying, you know, I'm a I was a good parent. Like, why do you think I'm gonna be a bad grader? But I don't think that's what they're saying. I think what they're saying is we want you to have a good relationship with the grandchildren, and we raise them this way. So follow the lead.
Barbara Klocko [:Oh, I know somebody who took her, grandchildren to McDonald's and got read the Riot Act I mean, the kids asked to go there and, got read the bride act by by the parents.
Wendy Green [:Right. Because we don't eat at that kind of place. Yeah. Well, I mean, when I took Grayson on our trip, the first one, you know, there was nothing out there by mammoth cave except, like, a Kentucky fried chicken or a waffle house. Or Yeah. She'd never eaten at place like that. So yeah. And you know what else surprised me about this trip? Too Barb that we were on is that those kids were not tied up on their phones. No. There's so much talk these days about all the kids being behind their phones. They were not.
Barbara Klocko [:No. And you know, I let Will charge his on my on my charger, but that was one of the advantages of only having the only electricity in the boat was on a car battery. And so, you had to be very scrupulous about it. Mhmm. And maybe they didn't know that We've got 5 I got 5 g service right off the, all the while, pretty much all the while we were in the harbor.
Wendy Green [:In Harbor. Yeah. But I think it's because they were so well, they bonded so well. That was amazing, but also they were kept busy with a lot of activity.
Barbara Klocko [:So the stuff, though, they engineered themselves, the card playing, and they, you know, I don't know what all, but
Wendy Green [:The jumping off of the mast netting or whatever that was. Yeah. Into that freezing cold water. Yeah.
Barbara Klocko [:But I I did. I I truly was impressed. And I think I started to say this before in our trailed off, but I was truly impressed that the kids were polite about the food the food which I can imagine a lot of youngsters having tuna steak for as an appetizer and tuna tartar, excuse me, and and being open to it.
Wendy Green [:No. They were great. And they were great about the cleanup.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. Yeah.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Yeah. Like, we had certain rules about cleanup because you're on a boat and you, you know, you have to preserve the space and the cleanliness and They were good about that too.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. They were, you know, I I sort of wonder about their expectations. They probably didn't expect that they were gonna have to work all the time, but, well, the windjammer isn't working boat. That's true.
Wendy Green [:And I remember Alex saying, you mean we have to work and we pay for it too?
Barbara Klocko [:It's kinda like student teaching.
Wendy Green [:They learned a lot, though. That was fun. Now do you think you would go on another grandparenting grandchild trip.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. But I I don't think I would do the same, and I don't think, you know, I, you know, I don't know. We do We have a lakehouse up north and, so it's like even though I'm still teaching, I teach you online, every day is a vacation. And so whenever we get people who come to the lake, it becomes, maybe it's their vacation, but, you know, it's a little bit of that too. But I wanted to, in line with that, I wanted to Do you remember these cards? The questions, there were questions for the grandparent and questions for the grandchild?
Wendy Green [:Oh, yeah.
Barbara Klocko [:One of them just blew me away, but it said, for the grandchild, and this was Will's response to what is your favorite memory with your grandparenting he said, at the lakehouse, fishing. And then Dan said, What is your favorite memory with Will? And he had fishing at the lake house. Oh, how sweet? And then the favorite tradition. Dan and Will had both had Christmas. Maybe they just copied from each other.
Wendy Green [:Maybe they did.
Barbara Klocko [:And I have just had we make Ginger Red House this every Christmas, and they are horrible. They're miserable. They fall apart you know, we'd do better with this, solder iron or paper or glue gun. But it's always it's always a hoot. And one year we made them out of wood and gotcha. And it was beautiful. Wow. Oh. Just about every other year, they're like,
Wendy Green [:things to build memories with the kids.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that it doesn't have to be elaborate. It doesn't have to be over the top. Yeah. Because then you say, well, who am I doing this for? Am I doing this? Or why am I doing this? I'm not doing this for anybody. I'm doing it with my grandchildren and I'm I'm just looking for, it doesn't have to be appreciation. It's it's relationships. Relationships. Right? It really is.
Wendy Green [:Have they ever asked you about your history or your ancestors? Like, where did your family come from?
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. Yes. Nothing too exciting, but
Wendy Green [:But, you know, that's the kind of thing that sometimes you get to, you know, our age and our parents or our grandparents have passed, and you never had that conversation with them.
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. Yeah. And Sometimes you don't know what you need what you want. What you don't know what you need until school.
Wendy Green [:Right. There's a song about that. Yeah. But that's why I, you know, I think like, I did go in with expectations of getting to know them and taking away any kind of or building the trust, let's say, building that trusting relationship. So that at some point, if they wanna ask those kinds of things, they they would feel like, yeah, we can ask, you know, because I guess I guess, you know, I'm thinking about, like, old. Right? So when we think of our grandparenting, when we were thirteen, John and Will's age,
Barbara Klocko [:they were old. Right? They were old when we were 2.
Wendy Green [:Do you think our grandchildren think of us as old? I
Barbara Klocko [:hope so. Otherwise, they've got some, you know, it's it's weird because when we go out with you know, peers. People are our own age. What do we talk about doctors, appointments, we talk about ailments, And then when we skip that generation down to, grandchildren, they talk about Hogwarts and they talk about you know, crazy.
Wendy Green [:I don't They listen to you, right, or video games or
Barbara Klocko [:Yeah. And and so it's kinda nice when you can find that middle ground and make peace with with all three generations that are around And there were, you know, in some cases, there's 4, but, unfortunately, not for us anymore.
Wendy Green [:Yes. Well, I we do have 4. My mother's still with us, so it's amazing.
Barbara Klocko [:Good for you. Just appreciate every day and Yeah. And accept her for what she where she's at right now, not who she was back then.
Wendy Green [:Right. Yep. But, you know, again, thinking about old, like, I don't think of myself as old. You know? So it's weird for me to think that they think of me as old, but I did ask one day. I said, how old do you think old is? He said seventy. I'm like, oh, okay. Go ahead. Guess I'm old.
Barbara Klocko [:I used to think hold was 26. The before we talked and you asked about my weekend and I said, yeah, it was rather transactional or rather and,
Wendy Green [:not not transformational.
Barbara Klocko [:Not transformational. But now as I think about it, a little bit of it was because we went to a baptism yesterday. For my I guess he would be my Well, my niece's son. So, yeah, so it's just a a great nephew. And, I was looking at all of the everybody in the church, and I was like, Oh my gosh. These I these are babies having babies, and these were Watch them grow up and, you know, encourage them and nurse them along the way and everything. And, you know, here they are. It's the next generation. And how do you pass the baton to the next generation? Like, oh, You wanna get a plate for grandma? Okay. You can do that rather than, oh, grandma's gotta cook this and do this and do this and do that. But it's it's that sense of oh, okay. I will tell you this. This was a strange story. We were out west and we had rented some I don't know if they were 4 wheelers or 3 wheelers. Might have been 4 wheelers, and we're going through the mountains and stuff. And, We stopped on this one cliff and this I was talking to this little girl or something like that. And she said, Oh, I said, oh, you look like you're maybe gonna start school this year. And she said, well, how do you know? And I said, well, I'm a grandma, so I know that sort of thing. And she said, well, I knew you were a grandma. That's really how'd you know? She said have you looked at your hands? Uh-huh. You know, like,
Wendy Green [:They will tell you like it is. Right?
Barbara Klocko [:Yep. Yep. There you are. There you are. So a few people isn't a curse.
Wendy Green [:It's not a curse. It yes. So if you could summarize the the joys of being a grandparent and traveling and the challenges of being a grandparenting traveling. What would you say?
Barbara Klocko [:What would I say? Well, I think that it goes back to that intergenerational mix that we talked about And the more we bring that into our lives, we bring some of the vitality of youth that we long to pretend we're we still are, or we also have that the sense if it's with a an elder parent, caring for an elder parent, we have that sense of trust and permanence and goes back to that safe harbor. And who do you trust to take you into the safe harbor and and be a mentor or or be your Be your bestie. You know, it's like I was so happy that Dan went along. On the trip, you know, and we never even considered just one of us going.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. And I want I you know, I think it is a little different when you have the 2 of you, than with your traveling solo with them. Because you are responsible for everything then.
Barbara Klocko [:Right. Right.
Wendy Green [:But I I think for me, the joy is is having that time to really even just watching them, you know, learning more about who they are and who are they are becoming.
Barbara Klocko [:Oh, they've grown. Oh my gosh. Will has grown So he was
Wendy Green [:he was so tall. I know. And I and I guess the challenge is for me anyway was, you know, sometimes knowing where the line is between being the parent and the grandparent because I do feel like, you know, you have to monitor behavior when there's a lot of other adults behind around and you don't wanna disturb people, like, come up. It's time to let the staff sleep. Yeah. But I think the challenge also is physical, you know, like Alex and I did a hike and thank god he was there because I needed help coming back down over those rocks on that little island where we did the lobster bake.
Barbara Klocko [:Oh, yeah. Yeah. I did not I didn't venture there because I knew my my whole right leg is weird. Like, I don't know why, but I can't pull up steps and without using my arms and the handrails and everything.
Wendy Green [:It was a tough hike. So
Barbara Klocko [:yeah. Thank god you were there.
Wendy Green [:And I think it was good for him to to realize that, you know, I was willing to do it and try it, but, you know, he also was felt good knowing that he could help me. You know? So I think that was that was a good experience for both of us. If if people wanna follow-up with you about any questions about what you're doing, they can email you at bklocko@gmail.com. And you can just tell her how much you enjoyed her presence on this podcast.
Barbara Klocko [:Well, let me just tell you this. You wanted to know if I wanted to sum it up. Relationships are all there is in this world.
Wendy Green [:Back last week, we were talking about uncluttering. And one of the things was, you know, relationships come before things.
Barbara Klocko [:So Oh, yeah. I always ask my kids when they were arguing about a toy or something. What's more important? People are things. That's right. Things.
Wendy Green [:Right. That's what kids say. Right? Okay. So if you're one of learn about this windjammer trip that we took or any other road scholar trips, you can go to road on the entry. You can go to road scholar.org /heyboomer. And if you'd like to be part of our Facebook private group, just go to facebook.com/groups /heyboomer. We would love to have you in our group. So next week, We are continuing on the theme of the focus on the family, but we're gonna be moving from the joy of grandparent grandchild relationships to the pain of family estrangement. It's kind of a hidden pain because most people don't talk about it, but my guest will be Doctor Josh Coleman. He's a practicing psychologist and author of the book rules of estrangement, why adult children cut ties, and how to heal the conflict. Doctor Coleman is uniquely qualified to speak on this topic as he was estranged from his daughter for years and they have since reconciled. So we're gonna talk about family estrangement in general, such as sibling estrangement, and even grandparenting estrangement as well as the parent child. I thought the book was well done, very insightful. So, Could be a little uncomfortable conversation, but it should be interesting. And I always like to leave you with the belief that we can live with courage, we can live with relevance, and we can live with passion, and remember that you are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream. My name is Wendy Green. Thank you, Barb.
Barbara Klocko [:Thank you, and thank you everyone for listening.
Wendy Green [:And this has been Hey Boomer.
