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8:18 Freaks and Geeks
Episode 189th May 2024 • Devil's Trap: A Supernatural Podcast • Don't Be A Dick Productions
00:00:00 01:19:20

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Summary

In this episode of the Devil's Trap podcast, Diana and Liz discuss season eight, episode 18 of Supernatural titled 'Freaks and Geeks.' The episode review focuses on the plot of the Supernatural episode, highlighting the characters and their actions. The hosts also discuss the themes of revenge and the role of teenagers in hunting. Overall, the conversation is a mix of Supernatural analysis and personal anecdotes. In this part of the conversation, the hosts discuss the events that unfold after the vampire attack. They talk about Victor's chaotic morning routine, Sam's conversation with Victor about his past, and the discovery of the blue van. They also delve into the strange behavior of the vampires and the research on vampire subculture. The hosts explore the different beliefs and identities within the vampire community, including otherkin and the physical and psychological symptoms experienced during awakening. In this episode, the principal themes revolve around the psychological symptoms of vampirism, theories on the causes of vampirism, and the use of blood substitutes. The conversation also touches on the characters and plot of the Supernatural episode featuring young hunters. The chapter titles could be 'Psychological Symptoms of Vampirism', 'Theories on the Causes of Vampirism', and 'Blood Substitutes for Vampires'.

Chapters00:00

Introduction and Liz's Substack

09:45

Reviewing Supernatural Season 8, Episode 18

23:08

Meeting Victor and the Teenage Hunters

27:46

Taking Down the Nest and Confronting Victor

28:04

Chaotic Mornings and Suspicious Vans

30:05

Unusual Vampire Behavior

35:24

Exploring Vampire Subculture

46:03

Otherkin Identities and Awakening Symptoms

51:33

Psychological Symptoms of Vampirism

52:42

Theories on the Causes of Vampirism

55:01

Blood Substitutes for Vampires



This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis:

Chartable - https://chartable.com/privacy

Transcripts

Jerk (:

Welcome to this week's episode of Devil's Trap podcast. I'm Diana. And this week we're going to talk about season eight, episode 18 freaks and geeks.

Bitch (:

And I'm Liz.

Jerk (:

What are you gonna do?

Bitch (:

So, uh, those questions are getting, I don't know. Um, so I just released a whole bunch of, a whole bunch of things, but a couple of new things on my new sub stack. You can find that at Texas Swamp Witch, TX Swamp Witch. And that is a whole bunch of thoughts and opinions about, uh,

what it was like to work in the cyber industry for the past 10 years and all sorts of those things. So, holding a platform is over there. I'm probably not going to bother setting up Instagram at all and just kind of do everything over on Substack now. It just seems like a better platform. So anyway, that's over there. So you should go subscribe to it. And that way I can feel liked and loved.

And even if you throw things at me, then at least I feel like something's reading my stuff and I'm not just screaming into a void.

Jerk (:

share that.

Jerk (:

Yeah, that's not a good feeling sometimes. So yeah, that's awesome. We'll get, I have to share a link on our Instagram so our followers can follow you there.

Bitch (:

Yeah, it's quite different from this world and occasionally there are, but there's also, I mean, lots of fun rabbit trails and.

Jerk (:

Right, right.

Bitch (:

Just things that as I'm going under research for other projects, I'm just also dropping that there. So I think I just like, you know, things like, did you know in Australia, there was once a bunch of convicts who, when they went on strike and was a bunch of female convicts, the way that they expressed their anger was they moved the, I forget which, which authority figure it was, but they moved the authority figure and then all slapped their ass at the same time. And it was hundreds of them.

So hundreds of bare -ass women like being angry slapping their butts so So go over there and you may read about women slapping their butts or you may read about cybersecurity Which or you may read about women in cybersecurity slapping their butts. I don't know I don't the whole like the reason I wanted to do that is because I don't have a job no more and So I can kind of say whatever the fuck I want and nobody can fire me and they could sue me if they violate stuff, but

Jerk (:

Far be it.

Bitch (:

Anyways, so that's over there. And, you know, it's a, it's a, it's a fun new platform. Maybe it's not new. I don't know. But I think they're also like, I feel very like, cause I feel like they're trying.

Jerk (:

16.

Jerk (:

It's getting, it's been around for a minute, but I feel like it's getting more mainstream usage now than it had in the past, is what I would say.

Bitch (:

It is, and I think they are working on adding a whole bunch of features, but sometimes...

I think technology people try and make some things too much like something else, right? Like, oh, we have this new thing that's like TikTok on here. I'm like, well, if I wanted to use TikTok, I'd be over on TikTok. And it was kind of fun. Like I haven't like really delved into it, but the way like you set up your pages and stuff, it really reminds me like this is like setting up your MySpace page or setting up your live journal page, you know? So I think they really are like clicking on that like, oh, hey, middle aged people, I remember

what you liked about the internet. You like making your things have glitter on them and like little like dancing like dancing unicorns and stuff like that, didn't you? Yes, that's what I like about the internet. And I just wanted to like, and I want to vomit out like my thoughts and my feels and you know, I think you can have chat on it. That'd be fun. Yeah.

Jerk (:

Oh, all right. I'm not. I'm not. It's not a platform I'm super familiar with. So there we go.

Bitch (:

Yeah, I'm enjoying it over there in that space. Well, I'm just by myself mostly, but you know, let me by myself. Oh, and I went and I guess, you know, it's fitness of choice right now besides fitness pizza and my mouth is, um, I'm just working on some yoga stuff, you know, before aerial things and, uh,

I had to I run away from my gym with the with a Colonel Sanders yoga. Just it's just too many people, man. Like it's all it's and they're always hot now. Like the rooms are always hot and like there's just but like sweaty butts and faces. So today, like I was like, I'll just go find like I went through like that mind body app and I was just like, I'm just gonna find a yoga studio I've never been to in San Antonio and found one that was.

not near me. It's not far though. It was like probably like 10, 15 minutes drive, which is not, it's not a big deal, but sometimes those feel like big deals, you know, this place is called Los Patios. And I guess I've known about it, but I didn't like, it's just a place off 410 and it's like, there's like an access road next to the access road that goes into like this wooded area that has a couple of restaurants and some.

Jerk (:

That's not bad.

Jerk (:

I know.

Bitch (:

hiking trails a think a rehab place a yoga place and some coffee, you know, like just freaking gorgeous and like in being in the woods in the middle of San Antonio and I know it's been there forever like I looked at this place and like holy shit this has been here for like since I've been born and I did not know if I knew about it. I forgot about it. So it's always nice to to find those things in your city that you may have known about but didn't.

Jerk (:

But yeah, no, that is that I always love that. I would do a concert. Sounds like so this past week I got to see a couple of cool shows. So I got to see Easy Action, which is the one of one of John Brandon from Negative Approaches projects.

Bitch (:

Yeah. So what about you?

Bitch (:

you

Jerk (:

So that was pretty cool in a room that in a theater, which is not the normal room that you see a post hardcore band. So that was kind of rad. And I had to see Charlie Crockett, who is kind of on the on the up and up in the in the country music world. That was pretty neat. And I got to see him play Merle Haggard's guitar, which is pretty cool. And then, oh, I lied. Merle, but Waylon Jennings guitar. Sorry, I've seen about something else. It was Waylon's guitar. I know. I know. It was Waylon Jennings.

Bitch (:

Oh, get your outlaws confused!

Jerk (:

guitar mama no I don't know but um

Bitch (:

I was like, playing like Meryl Haggard and then no, I don't have a Wailin' Jennings tattoo, do you? I don't think you do.

Jerk (:

But yeah, I saw that. And then, yeah, so no, that was that was, I mean, my big highlight of my week, it was a super busy week in my world last week and going into the weekend. So I tried to like rest. So I watched the finished fallout. And that's about it.

Bitch (:

I haven't finished that yet. Maybe that'll be a plain thing.

Jerk (:

Speaking of, it won't affect the show, but we are both getting a little bit cake.

Bitch (:

Yeah, vacation is coming. So I am sucking off the corporate teat that I just like spent many days writing and yelling about. So I am, I don't know, it's weird. Like I go into Mexico with a bunch of like, with my friend's company. That's just weird. And yeah, I'm gonna try real hard not to get him fired.

Jerk (:

I'm sure you appreciate that.

Bitch (:

I think he's already said things and like he said to kind of like in a joking way but like you can see like the fear in his eye like Should what happens if she gets too much tequila? Maybe I should watch how much tequila she gets But we'll also be in different parts of Mexico, which is funny

Jerk (:

Wait a minute.

Jerk (:

HUUUU

Jerk (:

We will, we will both be in different parts of Mexico around the same time. That's opposite sides of the country, but entertaining. But yeah, so, I don't know. I'm looking forward to it. We'll talk a little bit more about it.

Bitch (:

I know.

Bitch (:

There's something else in like pop culture land besides that they're dropping the trailers for Jensen Ackles and tracker I think those just came out I know I saw something on the Twitter But I didn't have time to poke at it and go see what that was. I saw Jensen posting something about that. So That's coming soon. So excited that I don't I finished dead boy detectives if you haven't watched that highly recommend it was so good

I feel like I've been something else this weekend. I don't know.

Jerk (:

We started Girls 5Eva. That's your recommendation. Not related to anything we do on our show, but I'm just saying.

Bitch (:

Girls' 5 ever was delightful. I th -

Yeah, no, I thought that was really fun. So anyways, so I think that's it. I think we're ready to talk about Freaks and Geeks, which was originally called Apple Dumpling Gang, Apple Dumpling Gang, which is hard to say. But I don't like it being called Freaks and Geeks. I don't think that really has anything. I think you should have stuck with probably the Apple Dumpling Gang.

Jerk (:

Yeah. Yeah.

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Jerk (:

I kind of agree. I think that's lame too.

Bitch (:

Yeah, it just makes more sense. And now I also want to go rewatch Freaks and Geeks and be sad that it was not longer than it was. But I wish I'd had that show when I was at that age. Like if it like a teen, if I was a teenager and had that show, I'd be really good.

th:

Jerk (:

Mm -hmm.

Bitch (:

Who we last saw do bands best friend with benefits, you know, and what's up tiger mommy? And this was written by Adam glass who we last saw with as time to go spy hooray and southern comfort. So You know people really like and this is you know, pretty typical season eight writing on this one, but so we start off with a

Recap that includes harmony, but she's not in this episode. So fuck you for showing me harmony and then not giving her to me

Jerk (:

Oh, yeah, it's mostly vampires. We get shown Chrissy again and her Vatala battle and more vampires. So. We open in Conway Springs, Kansas, and I'll Surely Die by the Rubens is playing, and I believe this is a mid 80s Plymouth Horizon is the appears to be the the station wagon park there.

Bitch (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

but they're on an overlook, it's parked on an overlook of like a dam and a river and there's a couple making out. So it's like a make out point, like overlook. And a van pulls up and someone runs past this car where these kids are making out. And it takes a second and you realize the chick making out in the car is Chrissy. Oh shit, all right.

Bitch (:

Yeah, damn, Chrissy, getting your groove on, good for you. It's still kind of, you know, maybe it's just because I have a lot of phobias and sometimes going over cliffs is one of them. Like, I don't know if I would feel safe, like being parked or it's pretty being parked there, but I don't like what happens if you make out and then like you hit the gear thing and then like you roll over and then like you're like rolling over the cliff.

Jerk (:

Mm -hmm.

Jerk (:

If you crawl over on their lap and somebody knocks the car out of park.

Bitch (:

Yes, I see that movie! I know what happened! So this is, like, this is dangerous. But anyways, Chrissy is apparently not just there to be making out.

Jerk (:

Ugh.

Jerk (:

No, because she's like, look, there is someone out there and this whole scene goes down where this dude, Aiden jumps out of the car with a knife and I hate, she's yelling, don't leave me here. But somebody smashes her window, pulls her out of the fucking car and wait, what? Aiden just beheads this assailant. Holy shit. And this other chick walks up to check on them and Chrissy says next time she's not going to be the bait. So this was all a fucking trap.

Bitch (:

It was a trap.

Yeah, or just a really weird way for you to hang out on your on your Friday night kids or whatever. I guess sometimes actually a school day. So this is like a really weird way to spend your day after your algebra test. So the young teen boy confirms that it was him.

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Jerk (:

And Christi, one down, two to go.

Bitch (:

And I'm like, God, I hate you. She's so fucking annoying. I hate Chrissy so much. All right. So we cut from that to the boys pulling up to the sheriff's office.

Jerk (:

Aww, I don't hate it that much.

Jerk (:

Yeah, because they've got a case with two different women with their throats ripped out. So sounds vampy. And Sam suggests or Dean suggests that Sam might want to take a knee on this one because he might not be up for the case just after things have been and the trials and all. And Sam's like, no, I'm fine. I need to know if you're OK after Cass beat the fuck out of you. And Dean's like, oh, you want to.

You want to talk about my feelings, need some herbal tea, some cowboy junkies and talk it out. And Sam just says, eat me, Dean.

Bitch (:

Yeah, but I mean, what did Dean expect? Right? How do you think anybody nobody is going to take the do you want to like, of course, I can go into the sheriff's office, like even if my blood has been monocularly altered in a way that an angel can't understand what I mean, doesn't mean I want to go check out what these vaps are doing. But like, the do cast hurt your feelings is like a poke. Like, it's so pokey. Like, oh,

Jerk (:

Right.

Jerk (:

Huh?

Jerk (:

I don't know, he hurt more than his feelings. Every fucking traumatic as shit get punched out that many times. Well, he did. He got booped.

Bitch (:

He looks pretty good after he got booed. So, but yeah, his boyfriend violated him. And so, and now he's gonna like, he has to live with that.

Jerk (:

Even if his wounds are healed on the outside, he still had to experience that.

Bitch (:

His emotional, his emotional butthole is still hurt. So.

Jerk (:

Ah, emotional butthole.

Bitch (:

So, okay, so they have that, you know, that conversation and we go and we meet one of the many bungling sheriffs in the world.

Jerk (:

Yeah. So the sheriff is like, I'm going to call these the lady killer murders because they're both chicks and they got lady killed. Anyway, it's what the fuck. He's all proud of himself. But. Sure. But he's of course, we know the corpses were drained of blood. Oh, shocking. And so and they were then they just found this other weird thing. They had a camera. They took these cameras to try to catch the killer. They had one at the make out point.

Bitch (:

You

Bitch (:

Killer murders.

He is! I'm just white! Okay, LadyKiller murders.

Jerk (:

And they've got this footage of these kids beheading the other thing. And then the body's gone and there's no crime scene. So they don't know what the fuck's going on. So he's going to send an APB on these three kids. And Dean immediately recognizes Chrissy and is like, oh, shit, you need to call that APB off and hand over that footage.

Bitch (:

Yeah, and it's weird they put a camera there like that's a strange strange place mountain but also makes sense so kind of get on you shares people and I would also think that it was a weird cult if I saw a bunch of teenagers like

behead but also be like why was he pulling that chick out of the car in the first place and I would I would be very much more intrigued than the lady killer murders like I was like something more is going on but the sheriff is not

Jerk (:

It is odd, but Deans, I keep cross streams with the federal investigation call off the APB. I don't care if it's culture drugs. Anyways, they didn't say that part. I'm just adding to it.

Bitch (:

Okay, yes, you're adding the drama. It's fine. So that yes, Dean feds his way at you throws his fed dick down and you can see investigation called off. And but Sam's like, Sam didn't catch it. Sam's like, what? What? What you doing?

Jerk (:

Yeah. And he's like, Sam's like, well, maybe her dad did get out and she's just doing this on her own. And Dean's like, I don't know, but I need to find her. So we cut to a motel where Chrissy, who is obviously like maybe 15, I don't know, 14, 15, somewhere in there, 16, maybe. And she has a fake ID that says she's 25 and some cash. And she uses that to get a hotel room successfully.

Bitch (:

40 bucks is enough to bribe that hotel dude. So I mean, man, inflation sucks. Like you're only $40, man, you could like fake a teenager girl could fake away into a hotel room now like, and that would cost her like at least a couple hundred bucks. I mean, you know, so anyhow. So Chrissy has grown up though to the point where she has gotten a fake ID. So we know something is going on with her and we see in the room, the young dude.

Jerk (:

But yeah.

Jerk (:

Yeah, and you're like, Rurro, and he's pretty, like almost aggressively flirty. And she's like, nah, I've got a boyfriend. And she says no.

Bitch (:

He puts hands on her hips and like, kind of like, yeah, and she's very like, stop sign, sir. I do appreciate how she sets the boundaries with him.

Jerk (:

She's good at boundaries. She does give boundaries.

And then this other chick, the other chick comes in, it's Josephine. And it ends up that Chrissy has this map on her laptop of the locations of all the victims. And they say that this vampire has been seen on the ATM camera checking into the hotel they're currently at. And so they're using the security cameras in the motel to identify that it is in room number 215. How did they get this shit? Who is this coming from?

Bitch (:

So what, like, how, where is, like, there's so much weird, like, this town has the weirdest surveillance, and we'll see this throughout the entire episode. Like, this is my brother watching you mixing with everybody, like, everybody just watching everybody on camera at the ATM machine, like, how the fuck did they get, like, why were they looking at the ATM footage? Like, why did the fan fee cash? Did they accept the fee? I don't know.

So anyway, so she's got we've got the ATM footage and she is hacked into the security cameras at the hotel like you said.

Jerk (:

Yeah. And so now Aaron has, or Aaron Aiden has some like fancy ear, ear camera that he pops on because he's going to go live to go to the room to hunt down this vampire. And Josephine's going to go with him.

Bitch (:

Yeah, so they so looking down they have this equipment. What the fuck equipment is this? And as you know, I am considering and just letting you guys know, you'll be first to know I am considering private investigator as a potential retirement career or like next path. Right. So I want to know where they got this because I mean, I'm pretty sure you can get on Amazon, but it's not cheap. Right. Like this is like a 15 year old kid with some sort of communication piece. This is, you know, or maybe he's just FaceTiming them. But.

Jerk (:

I don't know. Anyway, they Aiden and Josephine are going to this room. And well, because he stays in the in the hotel room monitoring and they approach it. There's blood droplets on the ground outside. It must be the vampire room. So Aiden's going to pick a lock now, because that's also what this kid can do. And.

Bitch (:

I do appreciate the lock pick from that side and then like it opens and it's not Aiden at all.

Jerk (:

No, it's back over in the in room 307 where Chrissy is and it's Sam and Dean and Chrissy pulls a gun on Dean.

Bitch (:

Chrissy's really into pulling guns in this episode too. Maybe that's just like, she's progressive. Chrissy need to calm your shit girl.

Jerk (:

little bit.

And she's just like really confused as to how they found her because she used cash everywhere. And he's like, yeah, we do it too, but we just pay more. That's how they outbribed her basically, which is hilarious.

Bitch (:

I also want to be like, yeah, Chrissy, you're a teenage girl checking into a motel. Now, and granted, like in real land, that may happen more often and maybe we're seedier than this, but for the like, you look like a very nice like little girl, it's not gonna be that hard to find you. Especially not when I can just look through the ATM. I can look through the camera on the ATM and find you like, you know, with all the security.

Jerk (:

It stands out. No. So it ends up.

Jerk (:

Yeah. So ridiculous. So Sam asks where her dad is and she says dead and then tells them to leave because she's got this and Chrissy, Sam and Dean are watching this footage now of Aiden and Josephine entering this hotel room and there's a woman tied to the bed and but she's alive and then a vampire like surprise attacks them.

Bitch (:

Ooh!

Jerk (:

In the meantime, Sam and Dean have run down and run into the room and the vampire jumps out of the window and runs away and Chrissy run. But there's in this van, the shady vans out there again. But then Chrissy runs after him. The van's fucking gone. Josephine's calling for an ambulance for this victim. It's in shock. Dean's chasing down Chrissy. And then outside, she shoots the vampire with these fucking darts that are filled with dead man's blood, which is actually pretty.

Bitch (:

Smart.

Jerk (:

Gold star, young lady. Gold star.

Bitch (:

Why are you the first I guess like I'm gonna say why you're the first one to think of this but no, why are you?

Jerk (:

Maybe she was, yeah. And Dean's like, oh, Dean's about to kill the vampire, but she's like, no, it's not your kill.

Bitch (:

I also hate that. It's gross.

Jerk (:

And Josephine runs up and she's like, Oh, this is the vampire that snuck into my house and killed my mom and two siblings and their sleep. And this vampire is like, I didn't do that. What are you talking about? Like, no, I didn't do any of that. And just he just keeps going on. And this vampire is very fucking confused by this story. Like, well, and I know, like, vampires lie, demons lie. This vampire is visibly confused and.

Bitch (:

and ate my family.

Jerk (:

Anyways, he's begging for his life and she beheads him.

Bitch (:

just not listening, not listening, and yep, they just run head on through their revenge, right?

Jerk (:

And yeah, and Josephine needs to have a moment and Chrissy comforts her. And Ian's like, we, we got to talk privately. So.

Bitch (:

Yeah, let me find out what happened to Chrissy's dad.

Jerk (:

Yes, apparently he did quit hunting like he promised. So that's good. And she was having a normal life and it was amazing. Except for the fact that the past came after him and after all, and they she found him one morning dead with his throat ripped out. So it ends up that Aiden and Josephine both also lost their families to vampires. So they all kind of came together and they're hunting this nest together that killed their families.

And Dean's just like, you were too fucking young for this. This is crazy. Crazy. I didn't say that, but that's what he said.

Bitch (:

No, no, he just know like what is going on like your child and you're living on your own But I mean again, Chrissy is weird. She does seem like a very capable young lady But Dean wants to take Chrissy to her aunt in Cincinnati, but apparently that's not necessary

Jerk (:

Mm -hmm. Because she's living with some dude named Victor. What the fuck? Well, now we're taking a different sketchy turn. Uh.

Bitch (:

What?

Excuse me Yeah, I'm just like so what you're a teenage girl and you're living with with a man named Victor and this is up This is all cool and he and he teaches y 'all to be hunters. Oh This sounds on the level No, no, no, but I see no molestation cues at all here. So Sam's like, oh, yeah, I remember like we we knew a hunter named Victor in Spokane

Jerk (:

Kids School for Hunters.

Jerk (:

Yeah, so, you know, we need to go talk to him. So.

Bitch (:

And the kids do a very efficient and effective job of disposing the corpse. Their teamwork is very good and efficient. I appreciate that.

Jerk (:

So they go drive to this house in a neighborhood. It's a very normal looking house outside and inside. And Dean's like, I expected more Lord of the Flies, less huckstables. And though, that's got different meaning now too, probably. Different meanings there too now.

Bitch (:

Yeah, yeah, that doesn't, yeah, that doesn't carry well, like after, and I think I marked it in there just so I went to put a yikes, but yikes.

Jerk (:

Yeah. So Victor comes downstairs and he's just a middle aged dude. Yes. But he likes sweaters. Yes, they all report in and Sam inches him and Dean's like, yeah, we met before. He's like, oh, yeah, we're Winchester's. Anyways, and he's hugging the kids and tells Josephine, move on, but never forget. And then he offers Sam and Dean a drink.

Bitch (:

Yep, and they all report into him and it's weird.

Jerk (:

And Sam's like, these kids go to school, right? Like regular school. And Dean's like, it doesn't matter. The kids should not be hunting. And he's like, I gave them a picture. I gave them a family and a purpose. Why would you take that away?

Bitch (:

Yep, but Sam and Dean are still like, I don't know. And then he talks shit about Garth and Bobby, so then I'm just, fuck you, man. That's fine, whatever, fuck Martin.

Jerk (:

Oh, well, he started with Martin insane, which is true. And he says Garth has dropped on a head dropped on his head as a baby and Bobby was a barely functional alcoholic and Dean tells watch it.

Bitch (:

Hey, he was a moderately functional alcoholic. He'd take that back. And Garth was only dropped in his head like five times.

Jerk (:

But.

Jerk (:

So he goes down and he starts listing like all the these, you know, the good things these kids have done. Josephine's all state athlete and national merit scholar. Aidan is basically a pickpocket. That's all he's got. And but Chris, he's a natural born leader and hunter. He's like, so what? He's like, I built the Beatles, the dream team. They're getting revenge. They're going to be better hunters than any of us were. Hmm.

Jerk (:

And Dean is very upset about all this him and him and Sam leave from it and Sam's like, well, maybe maybe they have a real life and are able to hunt. I don't know. Sam seems almost like sold on this thing as potentially. But Dean's like, no, we got to handle this nest first so that they can't. And and I want to talk to that vampire, that victim, because something was weird about that vampire. And so he leaves Sam to watch Victor while he goes to investigate and as.

Bitch (:

Yeah, the basic idea is like, look, if we take care of these vans and these kids don't have to hunt them and we can just break whatever this whatever this weird shit's happening in this house. Three kids like at least it's there. At least it's a nice house. It's not a shack. Like there's no like crack pipes anywhere. Like so it seems like a reasonably safe home, but also it weird. So whatever it like it just middle aged men shouldn't just have houses for teenagers like you just shouldn't. So.

Jerk (:

Yes.

Jerk (:

Yeah!

Jerk (:

Not setting out. It's weird.

Jerk (:

No, no, that's weird. Just kidding. There's things about that. Yeah.

Bitch (:

Yes, yes, it's weird. It's weird. I believe I looked at a map the other day about the neighborhoods and those things were marked the weirds. They were marked on there. Anyway, so speaking of things that are like weird and marked by these, the police, we see a blue van and a doodody.

Jerk (:

The fan pull up. Yep, that pulls back up to the house as Dean leaves. So we cut to the next morning where Sam is entering the kitchen and Victor is cooking waffles for breakfast for the family. And the kids are like, this is the chaos of them. Like it's like the television morning chaos of them.

Bitch (:

Is the television morning chaos and a waste of food? Like he's not even like halfway done cooking and they're already out the door. Like get your time management together, Victor.

Jerk (:

poorly planned. And they all run out the door and Victor asks Sam if he has if he has kids and if he wants them. And he says, he says worth it. And he shows him Sam a picture of him a woman and three kids and shares that a windigo ripped them apart on a camping trip.

Bitch (:

Oh no, get eaten by the windigo. So Victor's now is like, this is my mission. You know, I want to give these kids a stable hunting home life, whatever the fuck that is.

Jerk (:

Yeah, it's weird. They want to be hunters, but not to live on the road and hotels like they did, whatever. So we go to Dean, who is talking to our kidnap victim. And she's like, oh, yeah, I know Jimmy. I know Jimmy Day. That was the vampire. Yeah. She's like, everybody in town knows him. He's a hero. We had a parade when he came back from Afghanistan a few weeks ago. So.

Bitch (:

Thanks.

Jerk (:

This guy was not a vampire months ago at all. He has become a vampire sometime in the last few weeks. And then she says, I just remember this blue van pulling up, a guy asked me for directions. And then I woke up tied to the bed and it's Jimmy there crying and apologizing and super scared.

Bitch (:

Yeah.

Bitch (:

Yep, and so now we know like, okay, this was even worse. Like something weird is going on with these vampires.

Jerk (:

Yes, so hmm. Back at the house, the kids have gotten home early from school because Victor pulled them out of school because he found a target. This does not seem responsible, sir.

Bitch (:

No, it does not. And once again, Victor has found footage from this vamp from a gas station security feed. So what was that on showdown? Like I don't.

Some of you will understand the reference, some of you won't. Like how the fuck are you finding, like are you just scanning for open, like things that are communicating on the internet and you're just like hacking through them? Like why are you looking at a gas station's footage? Like are you going up to like every stop and go? I mean like, sir, can I have your security footage?

Jerk (:

very, it is very inexplicable. And Sam is super sketched by it. He's like, this, this doesn't make sense. And but of course, the proof is that this vampire is wearing Chrissy's dad's necklace. So

Bitch (:

And you can see that in a grainy security footage. It's clear enough that you can see a necklace. Usually you can barely make out if it's a person or Bigfoot. So hopefully it's Bigfoot. So.

Jerk (:

Yeah. Yeah. Perfect.

Jerk (:

So Dean calls in the midst of this and it's called Sam and it tells to him that like, Hey, there's no way like Josephine. Sam was killed three months ago and this new vampire was made within the last month. And there's something with this blue van. So, but, and Sam's like, yeah, there's something real weird. The surveillance that apparently Victor has. So I'm super sketched on this. There's not a timestamp on it and this is either lying or he's straight up wrong. So there we go.

Bitch (:

Yeah, so he's just like, why? Why you got gas station footage? It's weird. You want to do a time stamp on it? What's up with the van? Why are there so many fucking vans?

Jerk (:

Yeah. And so Dean's going to go talk to the hotel clerk. Sam's going to stay at the house and he sees the van outside and he points it out to Victor and it's like, all right, we need to go go hunt for this thing, whatever is out there.

Bitch (:

But the kids are already gone. They have left to track the vamp that Victor saw and made up or whatever that was on the conveniently. And so, you know that Chrissy's all half cocked and like, this is what killed my dad. We gotta go. It was like, you know, these kids have run out all amped up and.

Jerk (:

on there.

Jerk (:

All over. Oh, yeah. And the hotel at the hotel, the clerk confirms to Dean that the dude with the van in a hoodie did rent the room to 15 and he took a brochure from the rack of brochures, which no one does. And it was for all the Conway Springs Lodge, which is.

Bitch (:

I love for sure Rex. I love this for sure.

Jerk (:

I kind of do too, but I don't...

Bitch (:

I want to go to all the places that are in those.

Jerk (:

And but it's closed this time of year and it's just a couple of miles down the road.

Bitch (:

That's convenient. And so Dean goes out there and this place seems cool. I'm gonna go to it.

Jerk (:

It does. It does. So Dean's and in the meantime, by the way, Sam and Victor are checking out the van and walking in the park across the street from Victor's. Dean's at Conway Springs Lodge and it's a machete with his machete out. And it's definitely like it looks like a camp like a camp lodge. And it is definitely closed for the season. And he finds a very dirty, very bloody woman yelling.

Bitch (:

He just starts yelling at her, right? Like, which is not, you know... I know you think maybe he knows that she may be a vamp, but like, you see a woman who, like, looks clearly traumatized and your instinct is just gonna scream at you. Yeah.

Jerk (:

No... No...

Jerk (:

Well, he kind of slows down after he realizes how like confused and freak she is. And she's just yelling like, make it go away. It hurts so much. And she doesn't like the lights and she's confused and her fangs are popping out. And that's never happened before. All she knows is the guy in the blue van did something to her and her stomach hurts. And it's her first time getting fanged.

And then enter Chris, that will definitely get Chrissy Aiden and just feed with guns drawn. And it is pretty certain that she did not kill Chrissy's dad back in the park. Sam and Victor are searching and they've got somebody pinned. They've got a guy pinned behind a tree. But then Victor knocks Sam out.

Bitch (:

the Apple doubling game.

Jerk (:

and smiles at the guy in the hoodie who says...

Bitch (:

And of course, Hoodie Vamp is working with Vincent.

Jerk (:

So Dean back in the back at the lodge is trying to explain to Chrissy, Josephine, Aiden to put away their weapons because this bitch did not kill Chrissy's dad. And Dean explains that she's fresh made. She's only a day or two old. Same thing with the vamp last night. They don't beg for their lives. They attack. So y 'all need to put your guns down. Something's not right. These are not the vamps you're looking for.

Bitch (:

Exactly. And so you need to learn more about vampires. And in order to do that, maybe you need to go on the internet and do some research like I did. So we're going to talk about some vampire. I don't know what's Lord's vampire shit on the internet. So in 2006, Societatio Enterprises LLC,

Release these surveys which were answered by almost a thousand individuals within the global vampire community and that is both sanguiney or you must say that bloody blood sucking vampires and sigh ones, right so What energy vampires you can't I can't what?

Jerk (:

Like Colin Robinson? Colin Robinson.

Bitch (:

Yes, Colin Robinson. This came very close to just being about the Tyra Banks episode where the vampire community came out and talked to her. And like, if I could find out more things that would happen to those vampires, that still may happen. We still have five more years. This is so make a circle back to Tyra Banks and those vampires. So anyhow.

s. And that came out in March:

Those are questions. So from:

I'm gonna ask you some questions about it and you know, this is how we're gonna learn, but you know, there's no pressure here. So I know you don't have your fangs on, but put your fangs on. Okay, so from question number 37.

Jerk (:

I don't, I sure got him. Should have gotten him.

Bitch (:

These are the top physical conditions that were reported by users. So things like the things that they just suffer on a daily basis, right? So the vampires really had a lot of migraines, asthma, anemia, and bone fractures. Less than 10 people reported having porphyria.

So we can assume that they're referring to cutaneous porphyria as one of its symptoms is a sensitivity to what?

Jerk (:

Light.

Bitch (:

Yes, ma 'am. Yes, it is. It's sunlight. Correct. You know your vampire disease as well. So all types of porphyria have I'm probably saying that wrong, but they involve they have a problem making part of your hemoglobin, right? Is it is he may know that's like if you say if you cut it off of hemoglobin if it comes anyways, so Hey, you're hearing you're you gotta get some more him in there. I

Jerk (:

Thank you.

Jerk (:

It's not hemi, sorry. More hemi in your blood.

Bitch (:

more himmy in there and it is made of the bone marrow and liver which that kind of makes me hungry.

Jerk (:

And the restaurant reminded me that it had the best bone marrow out close, but there's another one that's...

Bitch (:

Yeah, so some of the things that happens with that is you do get the sun will make your skin blister and all those things. So but surprisingly, more more people had migraines than that. Lots of migraines. OK, so question 100 number 19. So the question they asked was, do you believe that your spirit has existed in a former lifetime? Twenty one point zero eight percent went one way and seventy eight point ninety two percent.

with the other way. So which was that no and yes? Does that make sense?

Jerk (:

I'm going to say the 20 % was yes.

Bitch (:

The 20 % to 21 % was no. So almost 79 % of people believe that their spirit existed in a former lifetime. I really enjoyed this one. This is question 137. Do you consider yourself goth? And our ratio is just rounding for time. It was 34 % and 64%.

Jerk (:

Oh.

Jerk (:

Hmm, weird.

Jerk (:

We're going to go with 34 % now.

Bitch (:

34 % yes, more than 64 % did not consider themselves go off.

Jerk (:

What? I'm let down.

Bitch (:

Okay, so this next one I just kind of just want to be like these people ask some weird stuff. So they asked what religion or practice do you identify with? So I just want to give you some points for just naming some weird religions you think that they they they they asked if they want to.

Jerk (:

Hmm.

Jerk (:

Oh, you want me to name some?

Bitch (:

Does name's the weird shit you think is on here?

Jerk (:

I mean, I'm going to bet that there's some wicca in there.

Bitch (:

WIC is definitely on there. But it is, I want to say they are very specific that it's the non -Gardarian version of it, not the other, just to be clear.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

Okay.

And then I would go.

Bitch (:

Cause that's one.

So actually, and it will say like, to be clear, there is Wicca and then there's four different kinds of witchcraft. So there is regular witchcraft, there is Christian witchcraft, there is the Strigarian.

Jerk (:

Okay. Oh, that's like some Santeria shit kind of stuff that carries over and that kind of. Yeah.

Bitch (:

Christian witchcraft, I don't know, maybe, yeah. They have the Strigarian tradition, which is Italian kind of Romani and witchcraft, the Western tantric version. So I'm glad that they made that distinction. So you could like, because clearly as a Strigarian traditional, like, I feel like we're not represented enough. Yeah. So don't curse me, don't ask me. And I'm not making fun of religion if you are, sorry. What else? Yeah.

Jerk (:

broke it down.

Jerk (:

Yeah, that's no, that's like that's like someone. I don't know. That's like when that's like arguing about denominations of Christianity. Anyways. And then I would say I feel like that we need to touch on some Hindi, but I don't think there'll be very many Hindi vampires when I come around on it. Wow. OK, so.

Bitch (:

Nope, that's not in here.

Jerk (:

I mean, do we do we say we go with Christian? There's gonna be some Christian vampires.

Bitch (:

Well, no, it's not marked in here. And maybe it's marked in some. So, yeah. So I may have pulled a weird question. I think they may have asked a different one. So some of the things that are in this one. Ametheism. I don't know what that is. Agnostic multi theist. Acon mythology. Some things I can't name. Analytical theory. Ancient Druidism. Animism.

Jerk (:

Really? Shocked.

Bitch (:

Baha 'i, which is a normal one. I was thinking that any of these ones are not normal. Buddhism, Buddhism, Tibetan, Buddhism, Varyana, which I guess that could be Hindu.

Jerk (:

Buddhism. So, okay. See, I'm almost more surprised. I'm almost more surprised about Buddhism than I would have been about Hindi, but go ahead.

Bitch (:

Well, I mean, I think that's, I think this part, the Varianna, maybe they need to their class. So Celtic Payism, K .O. paganism. I don't know what that is. Chthonism, dark magic, dark paganism, death, dragon Celtic magic, earth based paganism, eclectic paganism, Egyptian high magic, Egyptian mysticism, Egyptian mythology.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

There'd be something Egyptian in there, but I'm like, yeah, but Egypt's mostly Muslims. So I was very like, how do you go that route? Yeah, I, uh, I.

Bitch (:

Egyptian reconstructionist.

Elysian, faith, Greek mythology, Greek Orthodox, Hawaiian, Hunna shamanism.

Jerk (:

Greek Orthodox, isn't that, that's technically a form of Christianity.

Bitch (:

Yes, yes, like I feel like there is at this point in here to said differently Hellenic paganism This is comedicism, but I think they meant to ask about her medicine lithium lily lily thean Which I did not know I could be just worshiping willis and have that as a religion. That's amazing. Okay, that's my new religion I'm gonna be a little thean assist living

Jerk (:

They're so detailed. Yeah. Yeah.

Jerk (:

No.

Jerk (:

Whoa.

Jerk (:

It's like, I wonder if there's Catholic Catholics in there. That's what I want to see.

Bitch (:

Well, there is a, there's a Roman mythology, which you think is different. Mesopaganism, metaphysics, necromancy, new thought, Nigelist, occult Catholicism. Okay, we got occult Catholicism. Old world paganism. Philip Christianity, phileo -Christian, is it phileo? Most of this is very small. Philio -Christianity, philosophical atheism.

Jerk (:

Mm, yeah.

Jerk (:

Not to be as... Whoa, there we go, okay.

Bitch (:

or something. Psyonix, Qi Hong, Reconstructionism, Religious Science, Risen Christ, Roman mythology, room casting, science and nature oriented pantheism, science of the mind, self divinity. No, okay, scratch that. My new religion is self divinity. I only worship myself.

Okay, Slavic paganism, Slavic recon, spiritual, yay spiritualism! No theosophy, but thearianism, tribal traditions, universal natural law, unsuspecified, and of course two different kinds of vampirism. So those are some of them.

Jerk (:

There it is.

Jerk (:

I'm gonna note that there was no Southern Baptist on there.

Bitch (:

Okay, there was not I did not see Southern Baptists, but also like, granted there was 700 questions. So they have some of these things happen to rephrase in different ways. I mean, I just pulled one that I saw was funny. Okay. So they would like to know, and this is going to be the same kind of thing. I want you to find what these are. So they want to know if you defined yourself as any kind of other kin besides a vampire.

Jerk (:

Oh yeah.

Jerk (:

No, still it's fascinating.

Bitch (:

And they wanted to note that not everyone in the vampire community considered vampires to be a classification of other kin. So I will give you one example of other kin that is in here. And that is, we'll just say angelic angel, right? So I'm a vampire, but I'm also an other kin, which I would just assume maybe some kind of other creature.

Jerk (:

Whoa.

Jerk (:

And then some of them, one of those is angels. So they're a vampire angel.

Bitch (:

Yeah, so they're a vampire and they're an angel. Yep.

Jerk (:

I have to, I'm sorry, I'm going to pause before we get guests on this. So that means some of this, this person believes and not just to clarify that they are a vampire, whether it be for blood or for, for energy or whatever it might be. And also they are an angel. Okay. I just had to process.

Bitch (:

And I will say if you go and you watch the entire episode, you will know that some of these believe this is genetic. We also get to that, I think maybe in some of these questions. So remember not all vampirism is caused by getting bit. Sometimes some people believe that that's just an inherited thing. Some of us, yeah, it's just a genetic marker. So.

Jerk (:

A genetic. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Just, just making sure I was understanding. So the other can, so some people believe that they're a vampire and an angel. I bet I'm going to, then you, some probably believe they're a demon. I'm going to, that's, I think that's a fair guess off the bat. Um,

Bitch (:

Alright, so people believe, they think that, uh huh. Yep, that's reasonable, that's true. Yep.

Jerk (:

I'm at a loss because my instinct that I go to otherwise is animals and I have trouble reconciling in my brain a vampire animal because a wolf and a vampire can't because don't they, that's a whole thing.

Bitch (:

They do have werewolf in there. So, well, I mean, did you watch underworld? Hello, the Liken and yeah. Yeah. But in some, in some mythology, vampires and Likens do go through. So some people believe that they're a vampire and a werewolf. Actually, um, almost 30 people.

Jerk (:

What?

Did you watch Twilight?

Jerk (:

I know.

Jerk (:

Okay. Hmm. Hmm. I'm just, I mean, I'm just processing too over here. So that one's a difficult one. Are we going to go with, are we going to say that? I mean, like at that point, is it like a cat or is it like also a, um, okay.

Bitch (:

Okay, I'll just leave you. Yeah. Okay. So for time sake, yeah.

Bitch (:

These are all otherworldly things. They're not like normal legs. They're not... And they're not necessarily like a cryptoid, but they could be... Or a monster, or just things that exist in the other...

Jerk (:

Not like I'm a house cat and you're okay.

Jerk (:

Huh. I'm going to let you share with us.

Bitch (:

Okay, so the first one, which is the biggest one in I'm not sure. So apparently ancient reincarnate. So I think that means like you're an ancient being before you reincarnated that have the most things. Then we also had dragons, elves, fairies, gargoyles, griffin, guardians.

Jerk (:

Mmm.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

Hmm.

Bitch (:

Lightworkers slash oracles Pegasus. That's a good one. I want to see you be a vampire and a Pegasus

Jerk (:

Hmm, okay.

Jerk (:

I wanna see a Pegasus with Vampire.

Bitch (:

Right? So there's I think there was one there was one Pegasus person. So there is someone who also is a phoenix, though there's many of those there's over over level 15 starseeds andromedans. Aliens, I guess, is an alien, right?

Jerk (:

That's it. Yeah.

Jerk (:

Hmm. Yeah. That's the type of alien.

Bitch (:

Therian, which I think is a Scientology thing, sounds like it. Unicorn and Watchers, right? And then also others, and some people did not identify as that. Oh, and there were some other subspecies, some sub things that didn't get as many. So, alien, ancient evolving chaos. Yes, that is, I also identify as an ancient evolving chaos. Avian being, that's amazing. Carpathian, cat shifter, nice. Coyote shifter.

Jerk (:

thought it was. Of course there's a unicorn.

Bitch (:

Demi -Diety, Divine Voice, Dwarf, hey, Fallen Angel, Feline, Fox, Gnome, Inspirator, Mermaid, Mimic, Polymorphic Being, Predatory Troodon -like Dinosaur.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Bitch (:

Some other things I didn't know. Raven, Salamander, Shadow, Shifter, Spider, Succubus, yes! Transdimensional. Tuatha, D 'Donnan. What was that from?

Walk in White Tiger and Wolf. All right. So question 198. What if any physical or psychological symptoms did you manifest during your awakening? So these are physical or psychological symptoms. So how did you feel physically once you became a vampire?

Jerk (:

Hmm.

Jerk (:

I'm going to guess that.

Bitch (:

And I'll give you like one of them was an increased appetite. Yep.

Jerk (:

I would say hunger, that's gonna be one I guess is so hungry. And I would say thirsty. And I'd say that your head hurt and your rage.

Bitch (:

Okay.

Mm -hmm. That's all there is.

Bitch (:

Yeah, I'm sure that's somewhere in there.

Jerk (:

rage or fear and confusion, something in that range of emotions and felt super strong.

Bitch (:

Yeah.

Bitch (:

That's not in there.

Jerk (:

No? Okay. I don't know. I'm just going down from the movies, all the shit movies and books. And I don't know. All right. What have we got?

Bitch (:

Yeah.

Bitch (:

All right, so some have had agoraphobia and claustrophobia. So that's not good. Disoriented, increased appetite.

dreamwalking and nightmares, seeing energy signatures and seeing auras, temperature sensitivity, sleep pattern reversal. So, oh, okay. So sleep, you know, sleeping all day and hang out all night. Yeah. Uh, headaches, depression, new habits, insomnia, increased creativity happened a lot, increased paranormal experiences.

photosensitivity, changes in food cravings, psychic sensitivities, overall increases in sensitivity, mood changes, desires to seek out similar individuals was the biggest psychological symptoms. There are also some others including blackouts, cravings for blood, decreased appetite, dehydration, dehydration, digestive problems, fatigue, hyper -insomnia, oh fuck I think I'm a vampire, increased empathy.

panic attacks, paranormal, paranoia, free cognitive dreams, seizures, sun allergies, ooh, and violent thoughts.

Jerk (:

Hmm.

Bitch (:

question 236. Which of any of the following theories do you support as possible causes of vampirism? Okay, so the number one reason that people picked, so you're not gonna really guess this until you was that it was a chakra, body energy, aberration or damage. So something damaged their chakra and that's how they became a vampire. That is the number one.

Actually, you're not gonna get any of these. I'm just gonna walk you through. All right, so...

Jerk (:

Whoa, I'm very surprised by this.

Bitch (:

Yeah, okay this one I think it would be not a

Jerk (:

So instead of protection neck, you gotta protect your chakras.

Bitch (:

but Chakra Chakras, right? And so also other things that happen, demonic possession or deity influence that seems reasonable. dormant gene theory. So you had a dormant gene that was through their evolutionary develop theory. So Darwinism, other kin soul and habitation. So that was those other kids up there. So you had a vampire that doesn't have an address. Oh,

Jerk (:

weird.

Bitch (:

Recessive gene theories, you get a recessive gene, which I don't know whether it's different than dormant, but a symbiont, I don't know what that theory is, viral infection theory, there's a lot of those. Okay, so also some lesser ones, less people said alien transplanted soul, allergic reaction causing energy need, astral parasites.

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

Parasites.

Bitch (:

Yes chakra energy body variance non damage developmental response to stimuli diabetic like medical condition energy deficiency from birth hyperthyroidism sorry hypothyroidism is not about the fucking thought my thyroid's vines I'm making me test it interspecies breeding intrinsic dark nature iron deficiency

latent human trait, near -death experience, methylene theory, neurological or biochemical condition, nutritional deficiency.

Jerk (:

So there isn't enough where there's actually like theory. I don't, nevermind. Don't just continue.

Bitch (:

Personal choice. Physical illness healed energetically. Psychic evolution theory branch of indigoism, indigoism. Psychic overlay of energy body. I don't know how much of things that, oh, state of being from birth. You're a vampire since you were born. Nice. All right. So question 325, this is going to be our last question. So.

What blood, blood, question 325, what blood substitutes do you use when you can't feed from blood? All right, so what do you think the number one is for a substitute for human blood?

Jerk (:

Oh God.

Jerk (:

I'm going to guess with like raw meat of some kind that they buy at the grocery store. That's gonna be number one, right?

Bitch (:

Yep, animal blood meat. All right, any guesses on the other things?

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Bitch (:

except chocolate is the second one was falling right underneath it. So. Yeah, so red wines on there, so it's herbal teas and juices and meditation yoga. I don't know how that's a blood substitute vitamins and supplements, fruit, milk, salt, vegetables, but the shortest one was all chemical recipes. So.

Jerk (:

I'm scared. I was chocolate and red one. Ryan, those will be the other two.

Bitch (:

fallen far out of favor are the alchemic recipes of old. Maybe it is time for resurgence. You can market that being an alchemic recipe influencer.

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Bitch (:

Alright, so that was our NeuroRos and NeuroRos surveys of the vampires and I think we learned a lot.

Jerk (:

And we did about, I think this category, this is Laura, this is fascinating.

Bitch (:

Yep. So those are the man. I would also like to see these. I want to see the survey conducted again. So I was 2006 and I'm going to talk. That's a very long time ago, which is scary, but.

Jerk (:

We're due. Yeah. Oh God, I'm scared about it. But I feel like they shouldn't have left all the questions open -ended like that. I feel like in a survey like that, here's my, this Diana's hot take on their survey. That's why you end up with like seven gazillions and you end up with 600 answers from 600 people because too many subgroups.

Bitch (:

Yeah, but how else are you gonna know that you had an alien parasite in there if you don't specifically write in the other?

Jerk (:

Well, you have to go in and list like the main, like, was it this, which includes A, B, and C, this, which includes A, B, and C, this, which includes A, B, and C, or other, and then you have a blank for that one, because not everybody is going to have an other.

Bitch (:

Yeah, but then how do you know these things exist? So I'm just happy to learn that these are things that there is a vampire dwarf running around there and, and maybe he's also a Pegasus. So a vampire Pegasus who is Oh my God, it's a miniature Pegasus.

Jerk (:

guess. I guess.

Jerk (:

Oh.

Jerk (:

It's a dwarf pegasus.

Jerk (:

That's a miniature, miniature winged horse with fangs. He's very sassy.

Bitch (:

Okay, I think my new properties owner's association has said I could have one animal for one and a half acres. So I would like to have a miniature vampire pegasus. Thank you.

Jerk (:

There you go.

Jerk (:

Very reasonable. Smart choice. Smart choice. Oh, fuck.

Bitch (:

Thank you Yeah, if you can't if I can only have one yeah, they did not say this Oh, I'm not gonna doctor morose some shit so within this new property that I'm buying within my contracts or whatever the HOA shit is I could have one livestock like animal For each one a half acre right so they're like you can have a cow or a horse or a goat But what if I make them all one animal right so what if I make like a horse go cow? and I just

Combine all of them into one animal.

Jerk (:

It's terrifying. Can you have three then?

Bitch (:

I mean, then I could totally get, I get all the worlds in just one.

Jerk (:

All three. That's true. Yeah.

Bitch (:

Yeah, so anyways, alright, so let's go back to supernatural because before it was just like over So we're at this is also I'm pissed off like Sam's in this chair so that Victor can monologue in him Like why didn't they kill him?

Jerk (:

Oh my gosh. All right. So yeah.

Jerk (:

Well, but back, this isn't, we aren't there yet. We're still back in the place where Dean's trying to explain to the kids. He's trying to claim to the kids that it's not all about killing, that we should be saving this person. She hasn't fed yet. So all we need to do is get her maker's blood and we can save this bitch's life. Being a hunter isn't about killing. And Aiden's like, why should we care? Which is terrifying. But anyways, finally, and I keep coming around, I might literally write like, literally write, Aiden is a dick.

Bitch (:

Oh yeah, I just already was just like, yeah, y 'all can't. I just kind of.

Bitch (:

He is a psychopath.

Jerk (:

And he's like, and Dean tells Chrissy, he's like, look, we're gonna find the vamp that killed your dad, but don't be bloodthirsty. Okay, let's pack the shit up. And we need to go back and talk to Victor right now. And this is where we find Sam tied zip tied to a chair while

Bitch (:

Yeah.

Jerk (:

thing did the thumbs up again. Well, Victor has Sam zip tied to a chair so he can monologue uninterrupted, I guess, and hoodie hoodie vamps hovering.

Bitch (:

Yeah, but so they're clearly saying we're going to kill you, right? He's like, I'm gonna wreck this house. But why didn't he kill Sam while he was unconscious? Like...

Jerk (:

He waited for him to wake up so he could monologue Adam and then make the scene then set scene. That's gonna look like

Bitch (:

You know you can't kill Sam Winchester when he's alive. You know you don't. You are not capable of doing this Victor. I don't know why you thought you or you know Sam Winchester. Like I don't understand like what like maybe he met baby Sam before or something.

Jerk (:

Mmm. Mmm -mmm.

Jerk (:

Mm hmm. And he but he's going to but he's going to inspire these kids even more by them finding Sam dead. Can they say that he you know that this this nest of vamps came and killed Sam because he can't have Sam or anyone else poison these kids minds anymore. And he's so mad. And he's like, finally, Sam's like, why what does this vampire dude get out of this? What the fuck?

And so the monologue continues and he's like, that's the vibe. You know, we've been at wars, hunters, Leviathan was a wake up call and we need to survive. You're not a father. So you can't relate. Blah, blah, blah. Next generation. And he's so busy fucking monologuing that he fucks up his timeline and Dean enters with the kids. And Victor points his gun and the vampire fangs out and Victor tells the kids that Sam and Dean can't be trusted.

Bitch (:

Yeah, but the kids are like but there's a vampire here and you were working with him, so I'm pretty sure like

Jerk (:

Right. And he's like, do you know this vampire? What the fuck?

Jerk (:

Yeah. And Dean's like, yeah, the hoodie vamps over here making fucking new vampires and y 'all are setting them up as easy kills for the kids. And Chrissy is like, we know that those vampires didn't kill our families. And Victor fucking confirms it. And Josephine's like, who did? And the hoodie vamp says, I did. And they screamed and begged for mercy. Oh, fuck that guy. Victor.

Bitch (:

Yeah, he's so creepy, you know, but he reminds me of shit. There's like a an actor who used to wear a hoodie. Oh my God, it is super white, dude. I'll have to look it up and I'll find it and you'll be like, oh yeah, I mean, that's exactly who the city vamp is. Anyways, so. A hoodie vamp is. Do you ever learn any vans names? He just hoodie vamp the whole episode. OK.

Jerk (:

It is Seth. Victor says it once and then we get to it in the cast. I feel like he looks kind of like Joshua Johnson is what I kept coming to. Or Joshua Jackson, excuse me. But that's big. That's a super big from Fringe. But anyways. But here's the thing. Victor confirms that this happened and.

Bitch (:

Maybe, yeah, I feel...

Jerk (:

He but and Victor is like, no, you know, this was all we did it so to build a better future. So Victor ordered this work with this vampire for some reason. I don't understand still what Seth and Victor's relationship is, but for some reason, they work together. I guess Seth's just getting off on this shit. So hoodie vamp. I think they're ordered like studied these kids. They stalk these fucking kids. Had this vampire kill their fucking families.

so he could recruit them to make them hunters.

Bitch (:

Yeah, he's psycho.

Jerk (:

WTF like I cannot wrap my brain around this. Oh, Rami Malek is who you're thinking of.

Bitch (:

Yeah, completely. That's who that was. Especially as Mr. Robot.

Jerk (:

Yeah, he wear that hoodie a lot. Anyways, Chrissy is fucking pissed. Rightfully so. They killed her fucking dad just so he could make a little hunter army of little children, which is fucked. And Victor's like still going off. And it's bigger than all of us. You need perspective. Give me a hug and we'll get past this. And the kids are like, Nabra. No hugs, no hugs. So Hooty Vamp grabs Aiden because he knows he sees this shit's falling apart.

Hmm. And he tries to leave Victor just tries to bail. But Chris, he's like, Nope. And the kids have turned. They shoot the vampire with the blood art. And so Aiden gets away and Chrissy. Oh, it's gross. Right in the eyeball. And she puts a revolver on Victor. And Dean's trying to stop Chrissy because Chrissy about to fucking shoot the fuck out of Victor. Like she's done. Right.

Bitch (:

In the eyes though, they can eat it. It's just like crazy.

Jerk (:

And she's going off how she wants revenge for her families and that he's not a person. He's a monster. And I'm like, she's not wrong. And as Dean kind of approaches her, he's on his knees and she pulls the trigger and it goes click. And she keeps going and just keeps clicking. And he is like. Shitting himself, rightfully so. But she just clicks all the way through that whole chamber.

Bitch (:

He's, you know, he shit himself. Yep.

Jerk (:

Yeah, and he's crying and then she pulls all the bullets out of her pocket and drops them on him. It was pretty f***ing cool.

Jerk (:

And so she said she's going to let him live all alone. Hmm. But he has an ankle gun. Oh, shit. But he just shoots himself.

Bitch (:

Yeah, think about suicide.

Jerk (:

So, oof.

Bitch (:

So then we cut to that, you know, we've got the hoodie vamp's blood has been drained and put into a nice little cup for baby bat to drink.

Jerk (:

Yeah. So she can so she can drink the blood and not be a vampire. Why was it a clear mug? I know the mug didn't need to be clear. I don't have how many people have that many clear mugs anyways. And and Dean tells Chrissy that he's proud of her and Sam gives her her dad's necklace because they did get it back. And Dean really wants to take Chrissy to Cincinnati. But.

Bitch (:

They also put it in a clear mug and like, why would you do that?

Jerk (:

She says, no, I'm going to stay here with Aiden and Josephine.

the fuck and he's like y 'all are fucking minors but just seems about to be 18 but that doesn't matter like you can't like a random just because you live with an 18 year old you can't they just that 18 year old can't just like register you for school this is not how things work right I mean I know it's TV but

Bitch (:

I mean, you can probably, I mean, you can get away with shit if you really want to.

Jerk (:

I guess. Well, she agrees that they're not going to go out looking for hunts, but they're going to candle any monsters that show up near them. And they're just going to stay in this house. Like Victor just like left it to them. There's not an estate. What's happening?

Bitch (:

I don't even know how Victor got this house in the first place. All of this is really shady. Whatever, like, but Victor probably psychopath. He probably owned the house so they can just live there. I mean, it probably, but he didn't have any family. They got eaten by a Wendigo.

Jerk (:

Probably.

Jerk (:

I know, but still at some point they there'd be a question. I feel like I don't know either way he uh

Bitch (:

At some point, protective services, no, honestly, like everything sucks. They're probably like, your teenager is not going to bother putting you in the system. Whatever, it's fine.

Jerk (:

Well, Dean says he's going to have Garth check on them periodically. I appreciate that. It's like Garth just has to like check up on everybody. Like he's checking out on Kevin and giving Kevin a boat to live in. I do I come check on these teenagers like. Kind of funny.

Bitch (:

It was true.

Bitch (:

Hey, just taking care of everybody. That's what Garth does. So then we have a really cute exchange between Dean and Aiden.

Jerk (:

It is funny. So it's first Dean goes to fist bump Chrissy and she gives him a kiss on the cheek. And he take Dean takes Aiden to the side and he's like, yeah, yeah, I know. If I do anything to, you know, whatever to hurt Chrissy, you'll kill me. And he's like, no, if you do anything to hurt Chrissy, Chrissy will kill you. Pretty funny. I was amused.

Bitch (:

And wish him good luck. And which is, you know, it was nice.

Jerk (:

So Sam and Dean get out of the car and Dean has thoughts on all this has been reflecting on how important it is that they close the gates of hell because now these kids are hunters and they have a real life ahead of them if they don't have to fight things.

Bitch (:

Maybe not just them. Maybe other people can have lives too. So now we have this motivation as a reminder like, oh yeah, we're supposed to be closing the gates of hell. Forgot we're doing that. Sometimes we do that. We talk about it for a minute and then like, oh yeah, that's what we're doing. So, all right. And we got people to talk about.

Jerk (:

We do. We do. We do. So we have is first off our Aidan was played by Adam DiMarco. He had a small part in Star Trek Beyond movie. He was in episodes of shows like Charmed and Sabrina, the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. He was also Todd in The Magicians, Randall in The Order and Albie in White Lotus.

Bitch (:

I love that he's got a kind of a weird genre he's sticking to. That makes me happy.

Jerk (:

Yeah. Josephine is played by Megan Danso, and she's been in episodes of Continuum and Charmed. She had a bit part in Fifty Shades of Grey and she was in Fear of the Walking Dead. And she was a reoccurring character named Annie in Siren. Victor was played by Adrian Hoff, and he's been in more than one episode of Supernatural, different character. He's been in episodes of La Femme Nikita, Stargate SG -1, The L Word, Smallville.

s and:

Doc in Alien vs Predator Requiem, Colin's dad in Jennifer's body, Emil in Mortal Kombat Legacy, and Farmer Putnam in Shining Adventures of Sabrina in eight episodes.

Bitch (:

I mean, obviously, it's so shocking that it's not shocking that I hate Father Friar.

Jerk (:

Seth is our hoodie vamp was played by Cole Vigio and he was officer Harris in I Zombie. It's 13 episodes. And then he's like a lot of the Aurora tea garden mini mysteries, which is a Hallmark TV movie series.

Bitch (:

Yeah, you know there's like there's a hallmark like mysteries channel now. Yeah, I know that my mom watches that on. Yep.

Jerk (:

Oh yeah. And I got one. Oh, yeah, I've got one more for you. Our hotel clerk who was easily bribed was played by Matty Finochio. And I only mention him because he has quite the the the.

catalog of things he's appeared in. So he's been in episodes of Workaholics, Lucifer, Once Upon a Time.

Bitch (:

You also... So Adrian Howe and Victor Rogers, the one that you just said? Is that who he was? Yeah, he was in Supernatural before. Okay, okay. Because when you started going in this one, I was like, wait, I knew there was something I was supposed to remember. Okay, go for this one.

Jerk (:

Adrian, how was Victor? Yeah.

Yeah, I said he was in more than one episode. Yeah. So.

Jerk (:

No, he's in more than one episode. Yeah. So Matty played the hotel clerk workaholics, Lucifer, Once Upon a Time, The Flash, I Zombie, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Charmed. And then he was Tweedledee number one in Once Upon a Time Wonderland as a reoccurring character. He had bit parts in Night at the Museum movies to both Battle of the Smithsonian and Secret of the Tomb. He was Professor Foley in the TV show The Order, which is a reoccurring character.

character. He is Lee in the comedy Love Hard and was the quiz show host slash milkman in Riverdale, which was a very creepy reoccurring character and that has also done a lot of reoccurring Hallmark movies too. So sometimes our smaller roles, our characters on the show have some interesting other things going on. So that's what I got.

Bitch (:

Gracias.

Jerk (:

So yeah, I'm gonna go on a limb here and guess this is not Liz's favorite episode.

Bitch (:

Like, yep, Chrissy's annoying.

Jerk (:

I know you don't like Chrissy. I don't she don't bother me too much. I don't know why I said it that way. She doesn't bother me as much as she bothers you. She's not my favorite. I do kind of. So here's the I liked the concept when they when we first met her of meeting a young person who was living a hunter life. I thought that was interesting to bring into the storyline because that's what Sam and Dean had done in the past.

and Dean always tried to very much normalize it and say I'm didn't and it was that thing. So I thought that was kind of cool. Though the story was fucking sad, but anyways, and then now this is just like, it feels just a little like forced X -Men, kind of a thing, like not really, but like sociopath, like a weird sociopath horror movie slash X -Men, it just kind of makes it weird. Does that make sense?

Bitch (:

Yeah, and she's just not, I mean, her character is not fleshed out. Like, it's just like, I'm this cute girl that, you know, my dad died and so now I'm going to, you know, do this. But I don't know, I just, I never got empathy for her. Like, even just like her dad dying, I'm like, that's such a weird thing where they're just kind of like, dad's dead.

Jerk (:

Okay.

Jerk (:

Well, she obviously didn't process anything. And then now is on like this weird, like revenge fucking jerk off that Victor sent her on. And she obviously says that process, why isn't she, why isn't she at her aunt's house? Again, I think that that still is a critical piece of it. Why hasn't her aunt come and gotten her?

Bitch (:

But we were already kinda ha - yeah.

Bitch (:

Well, I mean, she could just be on her own. I mean, that's just that happens. But I don't know. I'm not particularly a fan of her. I also feel like there is a potential that this episode was a setup for a potential spinoff with like these kids and they're fucking like, we're just doing this town haunt. Like there's a few episodes we'll see throughout the series that were potential spinoffs. And I was wondering if this was if this was one of them.

Jerk (:

got it. And like just in case we've got, we're just queuing this up to see how people respond to see if they like it, this enough.

Bitch (:

Yeah, and then they like it then we can we can develop this into a series right so I don't think so it just It also just leaves me an achiness because I won just because victor's gross, right and this whole

Jerk (:

That's fair.

Jerk (:

Well, all these families are fucking dead and he just got to shoot himself and get out of it.

Bitch (:

Yeah, it's.

I feel like it's a very smushed, like this can almost be an entire season, right? And because there's so much like each of these characters, besides we know Chrissy's character, which is why I feel like that's, I think, the reason why it feels like it could be a setup for another show because, but it really just feels like they took that show and like tried to squeeze it into one episode.

Jerk (:

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Jerk (:

I think that's a very valid case. I absolutely agree.

Bitch (:

Yeah, because like, I don't Josephine had, you know, just like, those are all stories that you shouldn't want to know, you know, like, and it's just weird. It's

Jerk (:

Yeah. That we just get like a quick, like a one one line aside trying to tell us their whole damn story. Very odd.

Bitch (:

Yeah, so if you're if we're not going to do a monster of the week, if we're not going to be doing something that is pushing our gates of how storyline forward. So when we throw in these like very complex side stories that never get followed through, that's when I'm kind of like, why, why is this here?

Jerk (:

Why? Well, it feels unnecessary to do that. Like, if this is not, if you're not going to flesh out the story, then there's really not even a reason. Like you could just like made this less dramatic. I don't know.

Bitch (:

It's like the Hellhound episode, right? Where we were pushing something through, but still there are so many different characters with clearly a lot of backstories, right? There are like these very in -depth characters.

Jerk (:

Yeah.

Jerk (:

Well, it's crazy story about this like really, you know, this bonkers family and all the shit they're dealing with, like with these very complex characters and all we get is like a one line or description of them.

Bitch (:

Right, so it does feel like we're trying... I feel like that's happening a lot this season where we're getting these like... and they're very interesting characters. It's just like you want to know more about them and then it just kind of like ends and so you're kind of inflated, right? So anyway, so season 18... Season 18. Episode 18. We are close to the finish line. You think they're gonna close the gates of hell?

Jerk (:

I agree. Yeah.

Jerk (:

I can see that. No, I agree.

Jerk (:

No, too fast.

Bitch (:

No, you're not gonna do that in three episodes. Okay. Okay. All right. So that's Diana. Diana's prediction is the gates of hell will remain open. It's going in her book. Okay. Anything else to say about this?

Jerk (:

No, they don't have time. Ain't got time.

I don't think they can. That's my that's my opinion. My opinion. I don't think so. I'm intrigued to see how they wrap the season, but knowing that I don't think they're going to close the gates of hell, I'm intrigued to see how they wrap.

Bitch (:

Alright, so tune in next week to find out if the Winchesters closed the gates of hell. Cheers.

Jerk (:

Cheers, bitch.

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