[00:00:24] You'll learn strategies and tactics, leadership skills, and practical advice from successful women entrepreneurs to help you grow, nurture, and sustain your business.

[00:01:08] Shelley Carney: I'm doing very well. Thank you. We are having a little bit more snow overnight, but the roads are clear, so I made it over to the studio today. So excited about that. Our Messages and Methods show featured Jen yesterday. So that was fun. We get to see each other two days in a row. That's cool. Talk about marketing and all those good things. Let me tell you something though about what I am not doing well with. I am sick to death of listening to my podcasts come on and oh, you should learn all about TikTok and cryptocurrency and NFTs and web three and LA.

[00:01:54] Jen McFarland: All the shiny objects. It's a lot. And the NF, I've read about cryptocurrency NFTs. It's a distraction in my opinion. And I know that there are some people who are making some money with it and it's great for them. For many small business owners it's not a real viable solution to really anything. It is information overload. It will take you away from your mission, I believe. And it is not really, unless you are an NFT company, it's not core to your mission. So it's definitely something to be aware of, but what is it about that really is getting under your skin?

[00:03:02] Jen McFarland: I think I mentioned this yesterday. Yeah, it .Did. I mention that yesterday,? Like one of the,

[00:03:13] Jen McFarland: One of the worst things you can do in marketing is decide to change everything because you haven't maybe given it enough time to work.

[00:03:31] Jen McFarland: Go try TikTok. Yeah. That FOMO that's on the sign behind me, that fear of missing out it's strong. And as business owners, we are inundated with all kinds of quote-unquote opportunities, whether it's, web three or an NFTs or this new app, that's going to, make my life wonderful or whatever that kryptonite is. That's what today is about, acknowledging the kryptonite, which is that overload. Because I believe a lot of bad decisions happen when you're actually overloaded. I could be wrong, and I know that some people are the opposite. There's all different types of people in this world. What we're talking about in this show, isn't so much that analysis paralysis, which is the other side of it.

[00:04:43] So how do you know that you've reached that point of information overload?

[00:05:13] Then I'm studying and researching and then it's just I can't handle it anymore. Turn it off.

[00:05:22] Are you pretty disciplined about that? That you're just like, I'm turning it off now.

[00:05:32] Jen McFarland: I think that I saw a physical reaction, when I said I have 50 tabs open sometimes, and you're like, oh, I can't

[00:06:05] Or I'll get distracted and go do that instead of the thing I was working on. So yeah, it's a lot.

[00:06:30] Shelley Carney: I'm less likely to go down those rabbit holes because I'm aware of I'm aware, it's some people get on TikTok and they can't get off.

[00:07:02] I watch the late night shows and they tell me the news that everybody knows so that I can keep up. The things that everybody knows, but I don't need even to the,

[00:07:24] And then we also we're now we are really structured when we watch One program and that's it like just a nightly news to get it. And then we move on so that we don't end up doing that. One of the stories that I like to tell about, but I am an avid reader and that's the place where I have to watch out because I love to read and not necessarily the news.

[00:08:04] And so I read about Anderson Cooper. And then before I knew it, I was like reading about. His partner's life and yeah, it just had gotten into this big rabbit hole. And so I guess that what I have started to do in that information overload is become more aware of am I just scrolling and scrolling, or am I really far afield from what it was that my original intention was?

[00:08:37] Shelley Carney: So what my husband's like that he's always got tons of he's. He's got tons of tabs open. He's got a game on in front of him over here. He's got some kind of documentary or something is playing.

[00:08:58] Jen McFarland: I don't do all that. I think that I have become much more sensitive to being overwhelmed since peace Corps, living in a really quiet country, not having all of the stuff and things, we didn't have internet in the same way.

[00:09:33] And I've realized how much my productivity how I feel at the end of the day. It's doesn't feel as good for me. Reading atomic habits. I know that you've been talking about reading the daily stoic. There's just a lot of things that we do personally, to keep us in a place of productivity, maybe feeling better.

[00:10:01] Shelley Carney: Yeah, and then we can and I think when you stay in touch, like you've talked about meditation and journaling, of course. And when you stay in touch with who you are and understand your own values and your own priorities, and you have that firmly, in front of you all the time, then when opportunities and things start coming your way, you're more likely to say, does that align with my values?

[00:10:31] Jen McFarland: Absolutely. And I think that if you find yourself in a state of overwhelm, particularly when you're talking about marketing your business. Cause I think a lot of people get a little tight when they think about marketing their business, it tends to give us a little bit of fear.

[00:11:11] Shelley Carney: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And that's, again, something you need to write on your calendar or schedule time for make sure that you're doing it every day, because it's one thing to say, oh yeah, meditation, I'm going to get to that. And there's another thing that when you say this is part of my morning routine and I can't go on with my day until I've done it.

[00:11:57] It's one of those things that you do so that when you need it, you have practiced it enough that it's right there for you. You can lean into those those skills that come with it when you do it every day and it doesn't matter if you do it just for five minutes do it for one minute. If you're new to it, but.

[00:12:35] That full well of resources that you can dip into when you need it. I'm stressed today. Let me dip into my well of what I've learned about myself over the past six months.

[00:13:03] Do you agree with that? Yeah.

[00:13:22] And then you can, get to the root of the problem and say, is this something that's necessary in my life? Or should it be. Move it out.

[00:13:37] In the chat. Can we show it, look at this look or just learn? I'm just learning all kinds of things here today. So how do you know you're experiencing information overload? We've talked a little bit about what we know. And I think some people. They also talk about, doom scrolling and,

[00:14:07] And that's why you have to practice things like meditation and journaling. Grow your attention span back to a reasonable amount so that you can be productive and you can focus on a job that you need to get done until it's done.

[00:14:31] We will share your comments with everybody who, whether they're listening or watching right now. I do think that one of the things that seems to work with what you've mentioned, and I'm wondering if you can speak to this as well, is my husband is amazing at this, by the way I've never seen somebody do this in the wild before, he's amazing at making lists and he is very focused on he makes lists for his weekend.

[00:15:17] Shelley Carney: I do. Like I said, when I'm sitting there working or sometimes when I'm watching a video.

[00:15:44] Oh, I need to get this done today or sometime this week or whatever. And then I'll just have it there in front of me on my desk the whole week. And I'll just check it off as I get it done. I like lists.

[00:16:18] So it was like a picture of like steps and there were two big and then the other graphic was like, why don't you do it like this? And it was like a regular staircase, like leading to the goal. So I feel like what lists can do if you're reasonable. And this is what I mean about my own thing is I'll make a list and I'm like, I'm going to do 10 things today.

[00:16:57] Like I am moving into now. I have been more of a consultant. So my workflow was totally different. I'm going through like a transition now with epiphany courses where I thought, oh, I'll just make three courses in a day. And I'm like, and possible, like I had this whole idea about like how many courses I was going to make and what it was going to be like.

[00:17:38] So I would say one of the things that you can get really overwhelmed by is making these massive lists. Wait, before you have. Really formulated your plans before he really worked through what that workflow could look like, and it can be really discouraging and it can actually stop you from moving forward with whether it's your marketing or another project is, set reasonable goals, set reasonable to do lists.

[00:18:26] I don't know. Do you ever. Pressure on yourself like that.

[00:18:47] Oh, this is what we're doing. And then it, it continues to evolve as you work through the process and make, and this isn't working that, we'd like this kind of client, it's always a perfecting process. So you have to give yourself grace to say, when you're doing anything new.

[00:19:27] That you work through it in order to say, and I'm still doing this myself. I'm writing an after show checklist after the show's over. I need to do this, and this, and have to write it down because I might forget otherwise. Cause I get distracted. And I think that's a really powerful thing to have because then I can share it with other people.

[00:19:59] Jen McFarland: And that is the piece that I wanted it swing back to. Is the, give yourself grace.

[00:20:28] So it's, I totally, I am one of those people who needs to give myself grace and acknowledge what I have done. And I think that we all need to give ourselves grace and. Make sure we're not giving ourselves so much grace, that we never get things out of the door,

[00:20:55] So you have to spend time with the dog. And you're like, okay, I have to get this done Teddy. People are going through that with children with elderly parents. Anything else that they have to take care of in their lives, making doctor's appointments and things that pop up that you have to take care of, that you've got to fit into your life.

[00:21:22] Jen McFarland: we, can we get back to Teddy really quick? So Teddy is my mom's dog. I am back in Portland now after spending, I don't know, 10 days or something in Idaho dog sitting. So here's what I learned about Teddy. So Teddy had his own to-do list and once I figured out what was happening and talked to my mom and she's you're absolutely right.

[00:22:05] And we cuddle and we watched. And once I realized that I needed to take a little break to share time with him in this way, it was like a non-negotiable for Teddy. Teddy was like, you cannot carry on with whatever you want to do until this happened. Once I acknowledged that, then what I would do is I would take that break with him and then we would go and I would go back to work because he was like, no, I had my knee.

[00:22:54] And then figure out like, if that meant I was going to get up early, Or if it, Ben, I was going to work after watching a couple of crime shows with my dog, my mom's dog, watch

[00:23:09] Jen McFarland: I like him too. Oh, okay.

[00:23:34] And I think that happens a lot. The key is the. I think, and you tell me how you manage it, that when you have things that absolutely have to get done, you have to have a way to say, get out of this other space and find ways to get things accomplished so that you can get out and start taking action on the most important things.

[00:24:15] What's my purpose in life. I. For you. And I'm saying this for you. I love my dogs. I chose to have these dogs in my life and I choose to spend time with them. What, and dogs are like kids. They need you when they need you. And sometimes you just have to fit them in. But if you're in the middle of a live show, like right now, that's one hour a week where you say, that's it I have to have.

[00:24:48] Jen McFarland: or they're locked downstairs as they are right now because they don't have boundaries. Lock your kids, not lock your kids. Pets are different,

[00:25:07] I've heard people say that. And then when that law, when that livestream is done, then they're open to being interrupted by their kids. The rest of the day.

[00:25:30] We gotta go back in the office now. And I'd wear them out to the point where he would sleep again. And then I worked late into the night because I still had to tackle the list. And I think that's sometimes, and it also meant that I had to acknowledge. In order to get that stuff done.

[00:26:10] So I remember like I need to spend. And I find that if I can do deep work, meaning like everything else is closed and this is the only thing I'm doing, I'm more effective and I get way more done. And that was what I was doing, where all these whether you call them Pomodoro sessions or deep work sessions, I was doing all of these like non undistracted times.

[00:26:51] So those are some ways that you can beat away the distractions, beat away the information overload. And then I would suggest that. We, you have to start really focusing and starting your marketing. We can be so overloaded with videos and apps and tools and contacts from marketers, and they make everything sound phenomenal.

[00:27:45] Shelley Carney: Let's talk a little about FOMO. I see the sign behind your head. Fear of missing out. We all have that fear that we're going to be left behind. Oh my gosh. If only I would have gotten on YouTube in 2006 and stayed with it, I would be in a billionaire by now or whatever. Or if I had invested in Bitcoin back in the early two thousands, or if I had only, and I fear missing out again, I didn't get in on the Bitcoin to start with, so maybe I should get in on it now because I don't want to miss out.

[00:28:40] Nothing scarier than that. So that taps into our primal brain and says, I gotta be in on this. I gotta know what's going on. I gotta, I gotta take part, I gotta be part of this tribe. So how do you handle

[00:28:58] I. I have a deeper awareness of when I am personally stressed out. And I realized that when I am really stressed out, I tend to make bad decisions. So what I have to doing is when I personally am stressed out, I do what I can to remove. The things that I'm likely to buy or move, remove all of those distractions from my line of sight, I also have a pretty strong sense of myself and it really helps me to disengage from some of those trappings.

[00:29:54] And I think that if you believe that things are quick and that it's, you're behind because of this, that, and the other thing. It's a good time to take a step back and say, no, I'm not behind it's that building a business is difficult and it takes time and I need to be consistently marketing and showing up.

[00:30:36] So I think that when people realize, and it's interesting because Gary Vaynerchuk is not somebody that I necessarily ascribe to, but he's been talking about some really interesting things lately and he shared a video. From when he first did wine library. So he did start on YouTube back in, I think like 2003 or something really early.

[00:31:27] And it's because of practice.

[00:31:43] Jen McFarland: well and not. It's also that he has a huge staff and a big company, and many of the people that I work with and talk to around town, they don't have that.

[00:32:12] He might be writing some of the posts, but maybe he's getting help in ways that many small business owners are not getting when it comes to marketing. And that's why you need to find strategies, like many of the things we've talked about to help you. Beat back the information overload, beat back the FOMO so that you can start marketing and start doing things over and over again, to be effective.

[00:32:59] Need to go about their marketing and guess what? It's not jumping from thing to thing it's about the cumulative advantage of all of your work, of all of the things that you've talked about over an extended period of time, all the ways that you've helped people, how you communicate that over and over again, and how over time that adds up to something really great.

[00:33:39] And that's really the fear that I have with what you were talking about earlier, where, you're talking about all the distractions, now I'm going to make money from NFTs or now I'm going to make money, and it's you've never even given yourself time to be good at anything.

[00:33:53] Shelley Carney: Yeah. And you got to find what fits and what feels right. It feels right to. Work with this kind of person who has this specific problem, and I solve it in this specific way and that's fun and it fits with me. And you stick with that. And then that I think is finding that.

[00:34:29] Walking path in the store, he watched me walk, am I doing this or this? Or, how am I walking, measured my feet and all the different things, in one toes, the second toe is longer than the first toe. And that's true in some people. That will change what shoe you're going to wear.

[00:35:09] One less decision. What kind of shoe to buy? I just, I, I go to big five, I have my coupon and I say, I want that. And then I get those and shop shopping's done. And so it takes the same thing with everything in your life, finding the best fit and then sticking with it.

[00:35:32] The problem with information overload is it leads to decision fatigue. And one of the ways that you can eliminate decision fatigue. So this is what Shelley's talking about when she says, I know exactly which pair of ACX. This has been determined. It's the fit. This is what works for me. When you find yourself having trouble making decisions, you have to eliminate all of the distractions.

[00:36:14] And that's what people wearing the same clothes over and over again. But the black turtleneck sweater really had a lot to do with decision fatigue. It was like, I know that I'm, this is what I'm wearing and I'm willing to do it. So the things that you can do in your business to eliminate overload and to do, to prevent decision fatigue are very helpful.

[00:36:58] It's also another way of putting it too, to talk about your analogy is what if Asics changes the design of that shoe? How are you going to know that's no longer working for you? You've been, you've had a fitting, you have a really good sense of when you put that shoe on how it's fitting and that it's going to work, and you always have to be on the lookout the next time you try it on,

[00:37:20] So that's a good point. Yeah. I still check it. Yeah. Does it fit? Does it still fitting? Is it still working for me? Yeah. And that's something that, that people need to think about. Is there a clear demarcation of this is over it's time to move on when Toby and I were doing the show about treasure hunting, the treasure got found on June 6th, 2020.

[00:38:14] Try a different thing, different things on, in your business

[00:38:36] So you have to have a clear definition of what it means to succeed and what metrics are you going to be looking for to see if you're seeing even a small return on your investment of time and effort and what it is that you're doing. And you have to really, before you make decisions, reinforce that by talking to others, don't make decisions based on.

[00:39:18] Have you asked your customers if they're on TikTok, if they're buying things from TOK, if that's a decision platform for them, for example, finding out how long to try something. Sometimes it is hit or miss. Sometimes it does take a while. So don't give up too soon, but then also do some investigative work around whether or not the decision will work.

[00:39:54] Shelley Carney: Yes. Yeah. And success can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people. It isn't just about money.

[00:40:26] I have all my needs met now, what else is out there that I need to to work on in my life? I have time for it. So let's do that.

[00:40:44] Shelley Carney: I would say that a lot of times things come up, gotta be on target.

[00:41:08] You've reached that fatigue point of saying, no, they're like maybe I'll listen this time. So if, when you get to that point where you're just like, I don't know what to do. It's. Talk to some people who you believe in who you believe share the same values, the same priorities that you do. Maybe work with a coach, reach out to Jen or me and share your ideas and what's going on in your life.

[00:41:53] Jen McFarland: Absolutely love it. Love

[00:42:01] He has taken the week. My tree of the week is aligning. I have had an Alignable account for a couple of years and I haven't done anything with it. Cause I'm just like, eh, is this anything, are it? No, it says it just a LinkedIn want to be, what is it? And then the last couple of weeks I have been investigating it more.

[00:42:51] Cause they, we have a lot in common and we were, we liked the same things, whatever If you haven't looked at Alignable check it out. It's very similar to LinkedIn. It's they have, if you're on the free account, you can have 10 opportunities per month to reach out and connect with people, but they will connect you automatically with anybody on your email list.

[00:43:25] Jen McFarland: I guess I'll give it another shot. I had a paid account for a while last year.

[00:43:50] Shelley Carney: I do that, as you said, they've added groups for one thing.

[00:44:07] Jen McFarland: Yeah. Tweak it the week. Gosh I don't really, I can't really think of anything right now. I think I was mostly pretty keyed up about talking about dissolving information overload.

[00:44:37] Everything's kind of a, an adventure and a test. So that's my tweak is if you're interested in doing something. Give it a shot

[00:44:55] Jen McFarland: Yeah. Why not? Yeah. Inspiration

[00:45:18] And then we get to choose. So he say I have to go get an MRI and I've got some kind of weird medical stuff going on right now. I could put a negative spin on that, or I can put a positive spin on it. I'm learning about. My health and I'm being proactive. And I, and that's really good for me as a person to be proactive, take take action and to be my own advocate.

[00:45:53] Jen McFarland: I agree. And I think that for me, it extends into that idea of presence. So if I'm in the, if I get really stressed out, I sometimes stop and say, That's going on right now.

[00:46:26] Shelley Carney: Yeah, it's always good to be aware of what's going on around. And the big picture. That's right. That's when we get too focused on those little granular details. Sometimes we miss the big picture. That's

[00:46:44] Shelley Carney: think we're good. All right. I thought I don't feel overwhelmed at all. I feel either.

[00:47:10] Thank you for joining the women conquer business podcast posted by Shelley Carney and Jen McFarland, please subscribe and leave a comment or question regarding your most challenging content creation or business problem. Then share this podcast with family and friends so they can find the support they need to expand their brand and share their message with the.