Today's episode is all about your readiness to commit.

How ready are you to commit to your dreams coming true?

Did you ever experience this? You have a dream or goal after some time you reach it and then you figure out. This is not what you wanted, I'm not ready, this feels odd.

THis happens

1. when you don't know who you are and what you want.
2. when you did not focus on your readiness

What can you do about it ?

FInd out what you want by getting to know who you truly are on the inside.

With much love

A.

• Personal growth and support. 0:02
• Aurora welcomes listeners, shares personal struggles, and offers support for growth and expansion.
• Commitment and resistance to change. 1:41
• Willingness to commit is crucial for anchoring oneself and reaching goals, despite a desire for freedom and independence.
• Self-discovery and beliefs hindering relationship success. 3:34
• Coach encourages frustrated single woman in her 50s to explore self-discovery before seeking dream partner.
• Childhood beliefs of unworthiness hinder self-discovery and relationships.
• Prioritizing self-discovery in relationships. 7:11
• Speaker 1 emphasizes the importance of self-discovery before seeking a romantic partner.
• Readiness for dreams and aspirations. 8:52
• Unfulfilled dreams can be messed up due to unprepared nervous system.
• Speaker emphasizes the importance of readiness for achieving dreams and desires, both in terms of positive outcomes and potential setbacks.
• Speaker encourages listeners to work on their readiness and reach out for support, while also offering personalized coaching and relaxation classes.

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Unknown: 00:00:02

Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora, life coach and companion

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on this beautiful journey called life. Thank you so much for

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being here. It's been a while

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I had a family member in the hospital and ICU for four weeks,

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and it was very intense. So thank you for your patience.

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Thank you for being here. Most importantly, thank you for the

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people who request episodes who sent donations, or the ones who

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come out to the year and check out my physical location where I

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offer coaching and yoga, in the forest in a yard. It means the

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world to me to receive you, and to connect with you. And yeah, I

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hope I can bring value into your life and support your journey

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and be a little stepping stone when it comes to your growth and

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expansion and expression of yourself. I hope you feel good

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in your skin. I hope you have an exciting time ahead of you, I

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hope that you feel courageous and resilient and joyful. And if

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you don't feel that way, at the moment, if you feel, you know a

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little lost a little stuck, a little confused, or maybe

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frustrated, then I hope I can be of support.

Unknown: 00:01:41

Hi, today I want to talk about your willingness to commit, I

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recorded an episode similar to this one, not too long ago. But

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I really want to emphasize how important it is for you to

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commit to something, be it yourself, and be it your career

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beard, your relationships.

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Be it a hobby, we need something that anchors us down. And even

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though you might be saying you are a wild card, you like to be

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uprooted and just traveling around and not committing to

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anything not feeling responsible for anything, then you are still

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committed to being free and independent. But to do that 100%

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And to, to fully, you know immerse yourself in that journey

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is so incredibly important. Because what I keep seeing what

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I keep meeting when I do my coachings is that I have people

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with dreams with aspirations, with a strong readiness to

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embrace change.

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But also, there is a huge resistance to novelty and

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uncertainty and committing to one path.

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And that makes it very difficult. Because if you do not

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want to commit

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to that one path, then you will lose energy along the way and

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get frustrated if you do not reach your goal. So let's take

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an example here of a lady who is so frustrated that she is still

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single, she's in her 50s She comes to my coaching because she

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wants to get to know herself better. And she wants to find

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the partner of her dreams.

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And she pours her heart out, we go through the life wheel and

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discover where else she wants to grow. And we engage on a

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coaching journey and I share everything with her that I know

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can really help you in finding your dream partner. And we start

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by by exploring who she is, what do you want?

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And that's where it starts becoming difficult already

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because she doesn't know what she wants. And she doesn't know

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who she is. So for her to commit to getting to know herself and

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to finding out what is it that she needs. What is it that she

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needs to communicate in terms of boundaries? What is it that she

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wants from a relationship has to be so rock solid it has to be so

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when I asked her and I a couple of weeks down the road

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She has to come with that answer. Like within seconds, if

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she doesn't know who she is and what she wants, of course, she's

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not going to meet a person out there who is a match. Right? So

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for her to explore and be curious and be a little

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detective to find out who she is, she needs to commit to that

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path. Now in her past as a child, in her family dynamic,

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she was always communicated to or she always made conclusions

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about her self worth, that she is not deserving of attention.

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Yeah, in her family was communicated. If you focus on

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yourself, especially on self care, on Hobbies, that don't

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serve the world in any way, but are just there to, you know, be

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enjoyed, then you are selfish. So, with this belief system, she

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now walks into adulthood, and is frustrated because she doesn't

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know who you are, who she is, and she doesn't know what she

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wants, because an underlying belief keeps telling her that

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she is not worthy of committing to herself and finding out who

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she is. So it is two competing energies that are fighting

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inside of her. And of course, me as a coach, I cannot see it from

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the outside until she tells me what her childhood was like. And

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if her childhood was like she described, I will know, as a

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coach that we first have to work on these underlying beliefs of

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deep worth less Ness. Because all the other tips and tricks

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will not have

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a pull on her journey. So to say, if she still believes that

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she is not worthy of a partner, right, I can give her all the

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tools. For example, saying hey, you need to make space for your

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partner, you need to actually pretend as if your partner of

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your dreams was in your life already, you have to make space,

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you have to make time, you have to be curious about another

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person's needs and wants. And if you are still stuck in, your

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needs are not being met, and you want to have your cup filled

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first, no partner will engage with you. Right? You cannot

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start a relationship by saying hey, you gotta you gotta fix me

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now. And I'm giving, you know, to my parents, maybe to my

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children to my job, I'm always there for everybody. But now you

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got to fill my cup, that doesn't work like that. Nobody's gonna,

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nobody's gonna engage. And if they would it be a very toxic

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dynamic, that you initiate it.

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So for you to commit to a path of self discovery, to find out

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who you are, and to find out what you need, what is it that

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you want from your job? What is it that you want from your

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relationships? That alone will take up so much time and energy

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that I usually don't understand when people say, Yeah, well,

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I'll get to it once my partner, my new partner is in my life,

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that's not how it's gonna work. You got to do the work before

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you got to do the work before you apply for that job. Because

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otherwise your nervous system is not ready. Right? If I was to

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ask you, what is your biggest dream that you want fulfilled?

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And you would tell me I want a million bucks.

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And I tell you, within five minutes here is a million bucks.

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If you haven't done the work to feel worthy if you don't know

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what you're gonna do with that money. If your mindset regarding

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money is money as bad money as dirty, money doesn't grow on

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trees.

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What's going to happen with that million bucks that I just gave

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to you, you're going to somehow lose it is going to run through

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your fingers. And subconsciously, you're going to

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make sure that you get rid of it real quick, because you were not

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working on your readiness before. Same goes with a dream

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partner.

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If I was to tell you, your dream partner is about to come here in

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the next 15 minutes and then you'll be happily ever ever

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after. If you're not

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Nervous System. If your whole physic your your brain, your

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mind is not geared towards being in a committed relationship

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right now, in the next 15 minutes,

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you will either scare your future partner way you will

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reject it, you will not trust him or her, you will, in some

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way or another, manipulate yourself out of that situation,

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because you don't feel deserving you don't feel ready. And this

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is why I keep telling people, you don't want your dream to be

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fulfilled before you're ready. Because you would mess it up.

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Trust me, I'm an expert, and that I had so many dreams, and

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all my dreams come true. But I never had worked on my

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readiness. So whenever that person that sing, that Job was

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right in front of me, I started sweating and ran away.

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And I don't want that to happen to you, I want you to be so

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aware that you need to commit to your readiness in order to have

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your dream come true. But first and foremost, in order for you

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to embrace that change that new reality, that dream of yours.

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And be careful right now I'm just talking about the positive

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outcomes, right. But same goes for if you you know have desires

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and dreams, and they keep not being fulfilled. First you work

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on your readiness, and then you work on. If it doesn't work out,

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I'm not going to be overly attached to an outcome, I'm

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going to stay open. I know myself now so well, that if it

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doesn't work out, I'm not going to panic, I'm not going to, you

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know, lose my everything over this because I'm so rock solid

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on who I am. So, readiness for positive outcome for when your

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dream prince or princess is right, you know right there

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standing in front of you. But also readiness for when things

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don't work out the way we want to. And sometimes it's for the

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better. But if you keep thinking that it is a failure, that

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you're not deserving of that dream, and this is why it's not

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happening, then you close yourself up to something that

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might be even better than what you had dreamed up. Okay. So I'm

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going to leave you with that. Work on your readiness. Reach

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out to me and and share with me what it is that you're working

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on right now. I'm so incredibly curious. I want to know how you

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ready yourself for your dream for your aspirations. And then

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we'll go from there. I'll send you so much love. And like I

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said in the beginning if ever you feel like engaging in a

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journey together or if you want to take out the yard for some

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relaxation classes or for some in person coaching, shoot me a

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message and I'd be happy to receive. All right, take really

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good care of yourself. And I'd be out there very soon again