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Beyond Blame - The Demartini Show
Episode 1574th November 2022 • The Demartini Show • Dr John Demartini
00:00:00 00:32:43

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I'm sure you've had a time when you wanted to blame somebody or somebody blamed you and as a result you experienced volatility of emotions, feeling right, feeling wrong, beating yourself up or putting others in a pit. All these polarized emotions distract you and run your system down. Managing perceptions of blame or being blamed will set you free to focus on your mission and vision. Join Dr John Demartini to look into what blame is, how it comes about, and how to effectively calm down the emotional reactions around blame. Discover why it's wiser to dissolve it, and be set free from the burden and baggage of blame.

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Transcripts

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It's not what happens to it's your perception of it.

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And you can change your perception. So instead of blaming somebody,

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why don't you use it as a catalyst to do something extraordinary with your life?

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Let's start by saying that I think everybody here has

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blamed people

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and maybe people didn't appreciate that,

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or we felt blamed by somebody else and

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sometimes we didn't appreciate that.

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But let's talk about what blame might be and take a look at what it

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could be in order to transform it, to live beyond it.

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I wrote a little book called Beyond Blame many, many years ago,

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nearly 30 years ago now, and

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little small little book that was appreciating life.

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There's a thing called a false attribution bias.

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There's actually about 200 biases that you might be living with or people live

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with in their life.

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And they're basically derivatives of a primary bias,

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which is called a confirmation bias and disconfirmation bias,

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a false positive and a false negative sometimes called.

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But a false attribution bias is where you have exaggerated the blame

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of somebody for something that happens in your life and minimized your

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role in what's happening.

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We've kind of disassociated from our own causality and blamed things on the

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outside and attributed something to somebody else that we assume that

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has more drawbacks than benefits. Of course, in our life,

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we've had moments in our life we had things that we thought were terrible that

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people had done. And then a day, a week, a month, a year, or five years later,

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we look back went, Hmm, if it wasn't for that event,

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I wouldn't have done this.

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And now we realize that it wasn't so terrible after all,

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it actually had some terrific sitting inside it and we end up catalyzing

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something pretty amazing as a result of it.

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And then we came back and instead of being blaming them for a period of time and

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have the wisdom of the ages with the aging process, we look back and we went,

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wow, I'd like to go thank them, if it wasn't for that,

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I wouldn't of had this turning point in my life.

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So sometimes we don't take the time to perceive the upsides to the

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things we blame and we don't see how it serves us and then we end up holding

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onto this blame and staying angry at this individual and blaming them and have

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these false causalities, false attribution biases we call them. False causality.

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They caused me this experience.

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I teach a program called the Breakthrough Experience.

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I've been doing it 1,153 times.

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I'm about to do another one tomorrow and each week I have

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people coming in there and they are basically coming in with false attribution

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biases, they're blaming their mother for not being there for them.

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They're blaming them for maybe being too harsh or too soft or too, you know,

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smothering, or one thing or another. And they do it on their father.

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They do it on their brother and sister. They do it on their husband or wife.

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They got somebody that they want to blame.

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And they also blame themselves.

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They feel guilty for something they've done.

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Blame can go into other people or self.

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And these are false attribution biases in many cases.

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Our moral hypocrisies that we pick up from our mothers and fathers and preachers

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and teachers and conventions and traditions and mores

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to be one sided,

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tends to increase the probability of putting these dissociated blame

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mechanisms onto people and ourself. We're supposed to be,

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we have this assumption we're supposed to be nice, never mean, kind never cruel,

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positive never negative, then we're not,

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we blame ourselves for being less and this so-called perfect.

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And we also have these false expectations on them to be one sided and then we

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end up having these blaming mechanisms on them because they're not matching our

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model of reality, our fantasy about how reality's supposed to be.

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So a lot of them are false attribution bias. We falsely attribute them.

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We also find out if the economics go up and down during the market cycles and

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the credit cycles, we tend to think when the business is going up,

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we falsely attribute greatness to the CEO of a company and then if the market

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goes down and we then blame the CEO,

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we give false credit and false blame.

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And it may have really little to do with that,

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that individual's running the show. It's just a cycle in the market,

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but we do tend to have to scapegoat somebody or have to blame somebody for

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something. And this is where we put it.

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These are called false attribution biases.

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A false positive or false attribution bias is an assumption that something's

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there when it's not.

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And a false negative is just something that something's not there when it is.

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And we go through and we distort our reality with these things all the time.

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But in the Breakthrough Experience program that I've been teaching many years

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now, I see people every week coming in with these blames. I mean,

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it is standard, just a thing. They've got an accumulation,

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a narrative and story that they're running their life by,

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by an accumulation of things that didn't match their expectations,

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unmet expectations make us angry

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and we tend to blame people and project these things on.

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So we don't look at ourselves.

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We don't look at what role we might have played in them.

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I found out that when people are being criticized by somebody and they blame

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them for how they feel about it, they're not looking at what they're doing,

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they may be cocky and proud,

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and they may be doing something that challenges that individual's private value

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system, and then the person's retaliating with criticism.

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And then you're not actually looking at role you're playing in it.

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You're just blaming them for the cause of your feelings.

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Instead of looking at what piece of the puzzle you're playing.

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And I'm not saying to blame yourself. It was Epictetus, the

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Greek philosopher says in our journey of personal development,

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we start out blaming others and then we blame ourselves,

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then we find out there's nothing to blame ultimately.

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In the Breakthrough Experience, when people come in there,

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they got somebody to blame, either themselves or others, when they leave,

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there's nothing to blame.

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They realize a hidden order was there the whole time and they don't,

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they didn't take the time to look. I always say, if you're fully conscious,

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you see nothing to blame.

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When you're not conscious and you're having unconscious components with false

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positives, false negatives, false attribution biases,

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and unconscious conscious splits in the mind, you then blame, or give credit.

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It can go both ways, but today's topic is blame.

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So when I have somebody do something to me that,

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let's say they particularly verbally criticize me.

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I found it very useful to ask; what specific trait, action,

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or inaction do I perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating that I

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dislike most? And I narrow it down. I don't do broad,

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vague, general labels.

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I don't use hearsays about how they were supposed to be or who,

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what somebody said about somebody behind the scenes.

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I look at where I actually perceive this event.

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I look at what exactly that they did,

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narrow it down to the actions that they took,

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because it's a motor action that they took. And what specific trait,

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action or inaction do they display or demonstrate that I despise,

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dislike or hate most that I'm blaming them for?

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And you can't use how you felt,

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you can't blame somebody else how you feel about things. If somebody says, well,

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they made me feel sad. No,

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what they did is they verbally said something and then your interpretation and

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perception of it made you feel sad. Can't blame them for the way you're feeling.

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But you can, you can look at what they did,

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but how you interpreted it is different. Let me give you an example.

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If I gave you a billion US dollars, but I said,

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I'm going to give you a billion US dollars,

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but I have to take a hammer and slam your thumb.

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And if I just slammed your thumb without giving you anything,

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you'd be angry and you'd say, Hey, you hurt me.

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But if I gave you a billion US dollars and said,

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I'm going to slam your thumb and in 10 days, it'll be perfectly normal again,

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but you're going to have a billion dollars on it.

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You'd probably put your thumb there and go slam away.

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You wouldn't blame me for it. You'd be thanking me for it.

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And you'd be thinking, wow, that's a, that's a easy thing and easy billion,

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just putting my thumb in there and I've slammed my thumb many times without even

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getting anything from it.

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So the associations you make with what people do is your own reality,

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not their action. Their action is they slammed your thumb,

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but that's not what caused your reactions.

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Those are your reactions based on your perceptions and how you associate with

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things and if you associate more advantages and disadvantages,

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you're now giving them credit. If you associate disadvantages than advantage,

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you give them blame.

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The blame is not what they did so much as how you interpreted what they did.

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But you want to identify what they actually did.

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And if you go and find out what they did, what specific trait,

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action or inaction did they display or demonstrate that you dislike or despise

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most, and stop and get freeze frame on that and look at that.

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Because look at the facts of what they did instead of the fictions of how you

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felt. Now on top of that, then you go another question,

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you ask go to a moment where and when you perceive yourself displaying or

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demonstrating the same behavior, the same trait, action,

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inaction you despise in them most. And I assure you,

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it's been shown for centuries, even in biblical writings they referred to it,

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that whatever you see in others, you got within you.

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When you point your finger you got three back.

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And you may be too proud to admit what you see in them inside you or too humble

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to admit what you see in them inside you but the truth is you have the trait.

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And I've been doing the Demartini Method,

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which is inside the Breakthrough Experience for a long time,

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37 years of the method and 33 and a half,

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almost 34 years inside the Breakthrough Experience.

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I've yet to see somebody who is willing to be honest with themselves.

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I haven't been able to find anybody that can't own that

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trait,

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unless they're just choosing not to do it and they want to be proud and addicted

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to their pride,

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they can find out where they've done that same behavior or similar behavior in

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their own life.

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That's why pointing your finger at somebody doesn't really get you anywhere.

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It's basically,

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we only are reacting and judging people on the outside for things that are

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reminding us on the inside that we haven't loved in ourselves.

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If we feel ashamed of something and then we see something that we resent,

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they're reminding us what we're feeling ashamed about.

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And we're just too proud to admit we've done it. We're trying to hide it,

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to protect our, you know, facade and protecting ourself from feeling shame,

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so we end up going up and putting up a false pride and then defending it by

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projecting it onto them. It's a projection in psychology, they call it.

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So if we go actually over there and ask what specific trait, action,

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inaction do you perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating that you

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despise most? Identify what the action is, then go inside, go to a moment, John,

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where,

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and when you perceive yourself displaying or demonstrating the same specific

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trait, action inaction in yourself. And where was it? And when was it?

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Who did you do it to? And who perceived you doing it?

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If you go and make yourself accountable,

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look at where you've done it to the same degree as you see in them,

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quantitatively and qualitatively,

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and really reflect and have true introspection and

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instead of projecting blame,

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you start to look at your own role in the dynamic and you're not blaming them or

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you, you're just looking at the dynamic, what it's trying to teach you,

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because you're designed to attract people in your life to remind you of the

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things you haven't loved in yourself, to give you an opportunity to love it.

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It's actually a teacher instead of an injurer out there.

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I always say injury on the outside comes from jury from within.

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You're judging yourself and you're attracting the injury to try to point out

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what you haven't loved in yourself. Now, if you go into another question,

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which is part of the Demartini Method,

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I introduce in the Breakthrough Experience.

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Now go to a moment where and when you perceive this individual displaying or

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demonstrating that specific trait that you judge, that you resent most,

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that you despise most.

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And at that moment when they're displaying it, at that moment,

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how specifically is it a benefit to you? How is it serving you?

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How is it enriching your life? What's it teaching you?

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What are you learning from it? What are you getting to do because of it?

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Or what are you not having to do because of it? What is the gift it's offering?

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Because most people think there's a thing out there called an absolute judgment

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out there, 'that's a bad thing.' There is no such thing.

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When you study morals and ethics,

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I've gotten to read 400 books on this topic and study with some people that are

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specialists in this, there is no universal value system out there.

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Everybody likes to think there is, but there isn't.

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Around the world there's different values and different things and what's

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labeled good and bad in different places.

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In South Africa if you have nine wives, you're a president, in America,

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you go to prison. And at one time in the 60s, you had,

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you smoked pot you went to jail. Now it's legal.

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So we have in different times in different spaces, label very same things,

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good or bad according to our perceptions and needs of the society,

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the social contract that Locke has talked about in his writings.

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So there's no inherent system there that's good and bad until you make it so.

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And John Milton said,

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you can make a heaven out of a hell or a hell out of a heaven.

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And I've been doing that for years in the Breakthrough Experience.

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I've been taking people that have been through traumatized, terrible events,

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torturous events, and found out the upsides to them. How did it serve them?

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What were the benefits to them and everything else,

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and completely neutralized it so it wasn't running their life.

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Because anything you resent in your life,

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occupies space and time in your mind and stored in the hippocampus,

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makes you a amygdala instinctfully want to avoid it,

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and you're running away looking for its opposite all your life, which is futile.

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And the same thing for the things you admire, the same thing in reverse.

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So we're going around and letting other people run our lives because of our

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judgements.

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Instead of taking on our accountability and see things from a balanced

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perspective. you know, we have control of our perceptions,

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decisions and actions in life, not just what happens to us on the outside,

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but how we perceive it, what we decide to do it and how we act upon it.

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If we take that and ask, how did it serve us? And we stack up the advantages,

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we can take that thing that's hell and turn it into heaven.

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I've had a situation where I had a woman that was basically disliking a guy that

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was sitting in a room. And I asked her,

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does she know the guy?' 'Well no.' But he was just gross to her. And I said,

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I told her some of the benefits of this guy, within 10 minutes,

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not even 10 minutes, she asked me, well, can you give me his contact details?

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I'd like to meet him, introduce me to him.

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She had a change in perspective on the same individual that she first disliked,

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her first impression. And she kind of blamed him as, as Ugh, I don't,

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I don't want to do that, don't get near me. And then I asked her some,

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I basically shared with her some of the upsides of this guy that were true

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information about the guy. And all of a sudden, she's now interested.

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The ratios of your perceptions determines how you perceive life.

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And the ratios of perception will make something either a blame or a credit

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game. And so if you sit there and stack up all the drawbacks of something,

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you'll end up being angry at them and be, you know, blame them.

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If you stack up more advantage, you'll give them credit. If you neutralize it,

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you'll feel love for them.

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I'm interested in neutralizing it so you can love people.

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And they're representing a part of you. You can love yourself.

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In the Breakthrough Experience when I do the Demartini Method,

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I have people do that, find out the benefits of it,

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all of a sudden they get a tear of gratitude for the

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terrible.

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Instead of having the wisdom of the ages with the aging process and taking years

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and having entropy and aging over it,

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you can go in there and find the blessings of it on the spot, within minutes.

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If you take the time to be accountable. And I love doing that.

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When I teach the Breakthrough Experience,

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I love people who come in there with all these challenges and all of a sudden

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just dissolve them and melt them. You know,

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the problems they have in their life are basically because of incomplete

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awareness, unconscious data.

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Even Clause Shannon in his work on entropy,

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the tendency to go from order to disorder means missing information.

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And it's unconscious,

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we're unconscious of the upsides and we're blaming people and we're not seeing

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how it serves us. And we may find out that it's exactly what we needed. I mean,

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I was, I was almost died when I was 17 years old. If it wasn't for that,

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I wouldn't have gone to this little health food store.

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If wouldn't have done that I wouldn't have gone to this little yoga class.

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And if I hadn't have done that, I wouldn't have met Paul Bragg.

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And so that near death experience was exactly what's catalyzed me to be where I

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am today.

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I would not have gone on that journey if it hadn't have been for those events.

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And I'm a firm believer that if you look at life as in the way, not on the way,

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you'll be ungrateful instead of grateful and you'll weigh yourself down instead

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of lighten your life up. And it's not what happens to you,

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it's your perception of it. And you can change your perception.

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So instead of blaming somebody,

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why don't you use it as a catalyst to do something extraordinary with your life?

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So go to a moment where and when you perceive them displaying or demonstrating

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the trait, action, inaction you dislike most. And in that moment,

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how did it serve you? How did it help you spiritually?

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How did it help you intellectually? How did it help you in your career?

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Your financial wealth building? Your social life? Your family?

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Your health and fitness?

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How's it helping you fulfill what you value most in your life?

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Once you answer those questions and hold yourself accountable, and don't say,

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I don't know,

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I can't find it and stop and be righteous and hold onto your pride and

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blame. If you go in there and be accountable,

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you can actually turn into something you can say thank you for.

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And then when you do, you don't weigh yourself down. You lighten yourself up.

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And then you realize that the blame was just an illusion.

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The thing you blame is actually catalyst of great opportunity in your life.

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A great opportunity to learn and discover stuff that's buried inside that you're

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walking around with shame on. In the Breakthrough Experience

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after we identify the blessings of what somebody's done,

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then we go and look at where we did it.

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And then we go find out how it served other people when we've done it.

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Because we're carrying around our shame only because we didn't see how it

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blessed somebody else by the action. You know,

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I've had a situation where somebody came up to me me five years later after

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something,

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I was really tough on them in a seminar and I really gave them a hard time and

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pushed them. And they came,

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they were upset at the time and they wanted to blame me for being too tough on

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them, a tough love.

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Five years later they said that was the turning point in their life.

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And they came up to me and gave me a big hug and said,

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I brought my friend here to this seminar,

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because they didn't realize at that time they were holding onto a fantasy about

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how life's supposed to be, always be nice, never mean, kind, never cruel,

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positive, never negative,

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and all of a sudden I was firm with them about holding themselves accountable to

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find an answer to something they were blaming,

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they didn't want to look at themselves.

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But once they did and they walked outt of the program, upset,

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they went and looked, they self inspected, they discovered it.

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And then they end up catalyzing a transformation in their life and they came

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back and thanked.

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So sometimes you're carrying around shame and guilt over something that's not

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even real. You may be storing it for days, weeks, months,

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years over something that actually served people,

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and you're carrying it around because you haven't taken the time to find out how

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it's served.

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And when you don't find how the upsides to the things you're labeled downsides

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are, when other people do it, you blame them.

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When you don't find the upsides to when you've done something,

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you blame yourself. And when you blame yourself,

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you create autoimmune responses. You end up creating hetero immune responses.,

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you run your physiology down, it increases your aging process.

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It weighs you down.

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It makes you feel guilty and guilt makes you be more altruistic to sacrifice for

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other people to feel and compensate for it.

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All these things interfere with your mastery of life.

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So that's why I help people who come to the Breakthrough Experience to make sure

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that they go and clear all that stuff.

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There's no reason why they have to carry that around.

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They don't have to carry around their resentments to people or their blame of

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other people or their blame to themselves in shame.

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The blame and shame game is not really where you want to live your life at,

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better to go in and ask the right questions.

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The quality of your life is based on the quality of the questions you ask.

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If you ask questions that allow you to balance the state, you're freed.

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There's absolutely no reason. The same thing on the other side for credit,

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we some falsely give false attribution,

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biases and credit to people and minimize ourselves or do it with ourselves.

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And we go into pride. But anytime we're in pride or shame,

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anytime we get these false attribution bias on ourself or other people,

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we automatically are inauthentic. And we want to be love for who we are,

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but when we're not being who we are, how we going to be loved for who we are?

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It's really quite irony that we basically say we want to be love for who we are

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and then we're not willing to be that. We're going around with pride,

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which is an exaggeration of self, or shame, which is a minimization of self,

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or infatuation, which an exaggeration of them, or maybe resentment,

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which is a minimization of them. Neither one of those are the truth.

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They're biases, they're distortions. They're not reality.

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They're not actually there. They're just our perceptions of reality.

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And the second we do that, we undermine our power in life.

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Because when we're too proud to admit what we see in them is inside us,

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we have a disowned part and that's a disempowerment.

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And we're too humble to admit it, we got disempowerment again.

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But when we actually have reflective awareness and look inside ourselves and

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what we see in others inside ourselves, we have empowerment.

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Because then we put them in our heart. And anytime we are judging,

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we have emptiness. And anytime we love, we have more fulfillment life.

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And when we have more fulfillment life, we have more gratitude for life.

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We have more gratitude., we get more opportunities in our life.

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That's why blaming people is not really where its power is.

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I don't recommend taking, you know, and dramatizing it.

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I've seen people go to therapists. It's insane.

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They go in there and they blame somebody.

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I've seen people blame somebody for 35 years.

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They be going to therapy for 35 years telling people their story,

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and dramatizing it and getting it bigger. And it's as far as I'm concerned,

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telling people your story is probably the most foolish thing you'll ever do.

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Dissolving the story and turning it into something you'd be grateful for and

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releasing yourself from the baggage and the burden and getting on with what's

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fueled in life, then

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you change the story in the first place and you go and you say, thank you,

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I was unaware of what I was blaming myself for.

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You came into my life to help me see it, I'm realizing you're my teacher.

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Thank you. And you may be saying, well, what about somebody that really,

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really hurts you? What happens if something really devastating occurs?

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I've gotten to work with almost every imaginable thing that's out there.

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I mean major cases of beatings and rape and incest and you name it.

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There's nothing your mortal body can experience that your immortal soul can't

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love and transcend. And the question is,

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why would you want to blame them all your life and blame yourself for putting

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yourself in that situation and be trapped in that thing and run the story and

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drama all your life, when you can actually have the ability to transform it?

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You're not,

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you're not serving yourself by sitting there holding onto the story all your

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life.

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You're serving yourself by getting on and using it as opportunity and fuel.

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No matter what you've been through, no matter what you've done,

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I believe there's a way of finding out how to be grateful for that and move

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forward. And I'm not saying justifying it,

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people say well is that just justifying evil? No, it's not.

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It's transforming your awareness and seeing what you've been unconscious of.

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Because sometimes those things that you think are terrible in your life are

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actually gifts. And you just didn't take the time to look.

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And you just want to be right in your misinterpretation and stopped yourself

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from doing something extraordinary with your life.

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Anything you can't see on the way is going to be in the way in your life,

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and you're going to weigh yourself down with it.

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I've learned a long time ago if I take the time to go and ask it and reframe it,

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a cognitive reappraisal sometimes called, I just call it the Demartini Method.

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The Demartini Method is a series of questions that help you find the hidden

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order in the chaos you think you're storing in your life.

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And it turns out to be not.

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Every week in the Breakthrough Experience I have people who I said, how many,

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I want you to pick the most resented, most despised,

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most hated individual you can think of. Great, put their name there. Great.

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Who are they? Now go to a moment and identify what specific trait,

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action or inaction do you perceive them displaying or demonstrating that you

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despise and hate most. Great. Put it down. And I've done this thousands,

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over a hundred thousand times with people. And then go write that down. Great.

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And they're writing down what they think is upsetting, that they feel hurt them,

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and they're angry at it, and they're bitter at it, and it's all bad,

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in some cases, sometimes it's more moderate, but it's,

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I want the most extreme example. And then I ask them, good.

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Now go to a moment where,

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and when you perceive yourself displaying or demonstrating that trait.

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And at first their pride doesn't want them to look because it's going to make

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them feel the shame. And our amygdala doesn't want to feel shame.

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It wants to feel proud and gets addicted to its pride.

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And it then projects that onto other people.

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And we don't want to look at ourself.

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So they tend to dodge and avoid trying to get the answers.

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And I hold them accountable. Look again. I don't want them to make anything up.

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I don't want them to BS themselves. I want them to look. And when they look,

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they discover where they've done it. They've done it to their children,

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or they've done it to their spouse,

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or they've done it to some friends and they've done it to people at work,

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or they've done it to somebody in their life, in business or on the phone,

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when they stop and reflect and look at it,

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and I have them go through and look at all the moments.

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You only resent things in other people that remind you of what you're feeling

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ashamed of in your life. And this was in, I think in Romans 2.1,

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you see that written out in biblical writings. It's been around for centuries.

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It's not New here. Has been stated by great thinkers throughout the ages.

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What we see Is a reflection of us and a projection of our own stuff.

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So I make them go and identify it when they do, it humbles it a bit.

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Now all of a sudden they're realizing they're not too proud to admit what they

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see in others inside themselves.

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And now they're kind of bringing themselves back into

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and it's soften some of the judgment. They go, well,

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why would I be blaming them and judging them for something I'm doing in my life?

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But they're still thinking it's a bad thing. So then I ask, how did it serve?

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What's the advantages and benefits and the resourcefulness that came out of it?

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Because anything that's on this planet, If it's out there,

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it must be serving or it would gone extinct.

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So even those behaviors serve a purpose.

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Sometimes we get cocky and we get people that criticize us and bring us back

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down into authenticity. That serves a purpose.

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It calms us down from our arrogance.

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It calms us down to learning how to communicate more

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So if we go in there and find out how it serves and we get the benefits

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equalling the drawbacks, we all of a sudden have nothing to blame.

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And all of a sudden they go, Hmm, this thing that they did,

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I'm now grateful for.

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I can't believe I've been holding onto this anger for all these years.

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And then when you go and find out where you've done it and how it's served other

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people you've dissolved your shame.

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And the way I know the shame dissolving helps your blame game,

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is because I've gone in and taken people who've blamed something for somebody,

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looked at where they've done,

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didn't even look for the benefits in what the other individual did,

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just looked at the benefits of where they've done it.

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When they saw the benefits and dissolved their own shame,

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their anger at the other person and blaming disappeared.

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Because it's nothing but a projection.

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So then all of a sudden they're now realizing, wow,

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this is stuff that had nothing to do with them,

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this had everything to do with how I interpret this reality.

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And I want everybody to give themselves their power back.

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You're not going to give your power,

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get your power when you're blaming other people.

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Anytime you have false attribution biases and blaming people on the outside,

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or give credit to the outside, your hell or your heaven out there,

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as Milton says, you're going to disempower your life. Take it on.

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I always say that there's nothing missing in me.

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I'm a hero and a villain and a Saint and a sinner.

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I'm all the above and nothing's missing.

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I don't need to get rid of half of myself or try to gain something in myself.

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It's nothing missing.

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And when I come from that perspective and I realize that people are pushing my

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buttons, it's my buttons.

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I'm getting the lemon out of the lemonade inside or the lemonade out of the

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lemon that I have inside.

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Once I realize that I liberate myself from the dissociation and

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external sources of my thing,

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because anytime you externalize your source of your pleasures or pains,

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instead of internalize them, you just gave away your power.

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And people that are governed from within by their physiology and psychology go

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farther, are leaders, people that have to be governed from the outside,

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sociologically and theologically with all the moral hypocrisies,

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they're trapped.

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So give yourself permission to shine and let loose of the so-called

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blame game. You might find it's amazing. And also on the credit side,

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you can also put people on pedestals and minimize yourself.

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And that's just as in a sense,

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disorienting as the blame game and putting yourself up. Learn the art.

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That's why I tell people to come to the Breakthrough Experience and learn the

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Demartini Method,

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because that way you can master your mind and therefore help you master your

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life.

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And that's just one of the many tools that I give in that program to help people

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break through their stuff.

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So if you're interested in breaking through your stuff and not running around

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with blame for 10, 20, 30, 40 years and storing that, and by the way,

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when we store those blames, it affects our physiology,

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we create illness in our body to try to let us know, to teach us how to love

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again.

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I'd much rather help you have a story of love than to sit there and become a

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victim of your history. I want you to be a master of your destiny.

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Join me at the Breakthrough Experience that way I can spend 24 hours with you

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teaching you how to transform any of those perceptions,

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I'm going to give you a tool. It's going to be a powerful tool.

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You'll use it the rest of your life on how you can transform whatever happens to

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you and turn it on the way instead of in the way.

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And give yourself permission to more shine and radiate outward instead of

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contract and be living in phobias and fantasies all your life.

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So if you're ready to liberate yourself, come to the Breakthrough Experience.

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If you want to get past the blame game and the credit game,

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I was told by somebody many, many years ago, take no credit, take no blame,

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just keep focused on the chief aim, and the name of the game is thank you,

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I love you.

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So if you're interested for gratitude and love and wanting to transcend the

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blame game, I look forward to seeing you at the Breakthrough Experience.

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That way I can help you share in this new technology on how to transform your

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life. So this is my little presentation today on blame, living beyond blame.

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And I look forward to seeing you next week,

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but join me at the Breakthrough Experience.

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I guarantee you'll have a transformation that you won't get any other way.