Have you ever been told you weren't good enough, strong enough, or capable of achieving your dreams? If so, today's episode is for you. Join us as we dive into the incredible story of Rahz "the Motivator" Slaughter, a man who defied all odds with the help of one awesome grandmother!

Who Is This For?

If you've ever faced doubts or discouragement, whether from others or within yourself, this episode sheds light on overcoming these challenges. It's perfect for anyone looking for motivation and tools to turn doubts into stepping stones towards their goals.

What's It All About?

In this episode, Rahz Slaughter shares his journey from being born with a physical disability to becoming a motivational speaker and fitness trainer. Rahz's story is a testament to resilience, determination, and the power of a supportive community. With heartfelt anecdotes and actionable advice, Rahz inspires listeners to push past their limitations and embrace their unique strengths.

Some Key Takeaways:

1. Learn how to transform perceived limitations into strengths and advantages in your personal and professional life.
2. Discover the power of mindset shifts and how they can propel you towards achieving your dreams.
3. Gain practical strategies for building resilience and staying motivated even in the face of adversity.

Don't miss this opportunity to be inspired, empowered, and encouraged by one of the most amazing guys you will ever meet!

Mentioned Links & Resources

• Student Success Secrets on Amazon
• The Unstoppable Teenager Website
• FREE Coaching ALL Summer Long! Grab your spot ASAP! Either Text 'Summer2024' to 33-777 or simply CLICK HERE to reserve your spot!
• Follow Rahz Slaughter on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn

Today’s Awesome Guest

Rahz “The Motivator" Slaughter is a youth motivational speaker who has spent years helping students and teens improve their mindsets and take charge of their lives. Born with a disability and raised by a single mother who suffered from addiction, he was told countless times that he had limitations, that there would be things that he could not do, be, or achieve. Despite these messages, Rahz was unstoppable and set out to create a life of his doing and not what others expected of him.

Today, Rahz Slaughter is a motivational speaker and successful business owner. He is also an athlete, personal trainer, nutritionist, and coach. He has spent over 20 years in the fitness business, coaching and motivating people to make better life choices and improve their health. He was told that he could not body build or train others, but he ignored that and went on to win second place in a National Amateur Body Building Association competition and has coached thousands of people to greatness. Rahz especially finds great joy and fulfillment in shaping and motivating the mindsets of youth, particularly those who are "at-risk" or have difficult life circumstances.

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Guided by Faith. Inspired by life itself.

© 2024 Grit, Grace, & Inspiration

:: 00:00

Have you ever had somebody tell you that you can't or that you weren't good

:: 00:05

enough, that you weren't fast enough, you weren't strong enough?

:: 00:08

There's no way that you could keep up. There's no way that you're going to join the team.

:: 00:13

There's no way that you're ever going to accomplish this big goal that you say you have.

:: 00:19

If you've ever had somebody tell you that you weren't able to do something,

:: 00:25

that you you weren't good enough or strong enough?

:: 00:27

Well, today's episode is for you.

:: 00:30

I have in the studio today, Rahz the Motivator Slaughter, a guy who was born

:: 00:37

with a physical disability and he is no stranger to challenges.

:: 00:42

But what's awesome about Rahz is the fact that with the help of one awesome grandmother,

:: 00:49

he defied those challenges.

:: 00:51

He broke through the barriers and now he's here to motivate you to do the same.

:: 00:57

Today's episode is going to leave you feeling all kinds of good,

:: 01:01

smiling a little bigger, feeling a little more positive, a little bit more inspired,

:: 01:06

empowered to get out there and just make the most of this day.

:: 01:11

This, my friend, is episode 298. This is my interview with Rahz Slaughter.

:: 01:20

Yo, are you ready to flip the script on life? Because those bad days,

:: 01:23

they're just doors to better days and that's exactly

:: 01:27

what we do here at grit grace and inspiration your

:: 01:30

host kevin low he's been flipping the script on his

:: 01:33

own life turning over 20 years of being completely blind into straight up inspiration

:: 01:38

motivation and encouragement just for you so kick back relax and let me introduce

:: 01:44

you to your host kevin low you my friend are so

:: 01:50

lucky that you are right here inside of today's episode number 298. Why?

:: 01:56

Well, because I'm in the studio with one of the coolest guys I have ever met,

:: 02:02

and that is Rahz Slaughter.

:: 02:04

Now, maybe not quite to his level of awesomeness, but still pretty darn cool,

:: 02:11

is the fact that I'm offering free coaching all summer long.

:: 02:15

It's part of my sizzling summer special, in which you can book a free 30-minute

:: 02:21

coaching call with me all summer long.

:: 02:24

No obligation, no sales pitch at the end. It's totally free.

:: 02:29

It's me just wanting to be a help to you to get clear on your goals,

:: 02:33

to figure out where you want to go, what's standing in the way,

:: 02:37

and to map out a plan to get you there.

:: 02:41

All you have to do to sign up is text SUMMER2024, that is all one word,

:: 02:48

no spaces, SUMMER2024 to 33777.

:: 02:54

Again, text SUMMER2024 to 33777, or you can also just click the link inside of today's show notes.

:: 03:04

Either option is going to get you right to the calendar where you can schedule

:: 03:08

your coaching call ASAP.

:: 03:10

Remember spaces are limited and summer is a limited season so be sure to grab your spot today.

:: 03:18

With that my friend i turn it over to the awesome guy of the hour Rahz slaughter

:: 03:23

i was born with my right leg shorted in the other no quadriceps or hamstring

:: 03:29

on that right leg so for the listeners i have a three and a half inch difference

:: 03:33

in length between my right and my left leg as an adult.

:: 03:36

But as a baby, I was premature.

:: 03:39

And when my mother, we were going through delivery, my right hip was pulled

:: 03:45

out of socket pretty much. So they had to reposition my leg.

:: 03:48

And I believe that that was probably the catalyst to some of the dysfunction

:: 03:51

in this right leg, which led to the rest of my life.

:: 03:55

I mean, I had an upbringing just like most people, but I was challenged because

:: 03:59

right from the get-go, I was on the little short bus going to school,

:: 04:03

starting kindergarten.

:: 04:04

And kids made fun of me. I had crutches. I had funny shoes, all of the different

:: 04:10

things that anyone who has a disability,

:: 04:13

and I say disability for those who think about a disability,

:: 04:16

but I feel like my disability turned into my ability, my ability to just really

:: 04:21

focus on when someone tells me I can't, I must.

:: 04:24

And it started at that early age when I was born with this dysfunctional leg.

:: 04:29

Wow, that is so interesting.

:: 04:31

Now, as you would grow older, would it get worse or get better?

:: 04:39

Pretty much from the time I was about, I'd say five to 12 was some tough years.

:: 04:45

I had one surgery, which was totally a experiment.

:: 04:48

Doctor just basically cut my leg on both sides, right and left side laterally.

:: 04:52

And they just inserted two pins.

:: 04:55

And I had a cast for about three months. Did nothing for my leg at all.

:: 05:00

All it did was make me miss some school, which didn't push me back a little bit further.

:: 05:05

I wound up getting left back. And that was the beginning of some learning challenges

:: 05:09

that I would have to overcome as an adult.

:: 05:12

At 12, I was blessed to go to the Shriners Hospital in Springfield,

:: 05:17

Mass., where I had the second surgery, which was called the Alizaroth.

:: 05:22

And this Alizarov, for those who are listening, I had several rings with straight

:: 05:27

pins through my leg, right through the bone.

:: 05:30

And the goal of this apparatus was to straighten my leg and then lengthen it

:: 05:35

so that the doctor told my mother that I was going to be just like all the other kids.

:: 05:41

And I tell you, after six months of going through that painful surgery,

:: 05:46

every day they turn this little crank and it straightened my leg just a little

:: 05:50

bit and straightened my leg just a little bit.

:: 05:51

And they do this surgery because at this time I haven't gone through puberty

:: 05:55

yet. So I'm still going through the growth process.

:: 05:58

And they told my mother I was going to be normal. And at six months,

:: 06:02

my mom comes to visit me and doctor's there and he's got a big grin on his face

:: 06:07

like, Like, oh, this was such a success.

:: 06:09

And my young self asked the doctor one really critical question.

:: 06:14

So, doc, now that my leg is straight, how will it stay that way?

:: 06:20

What do you think he said, Kev? I don't. He says, well, he goes,

:: 06:23

well, you're going to have to wear a brace. Yes.

:: 06:26

And I asked him, I said, for how long? For the rest of your life.

:: 06:31

Now, I don't know about you, but that didn't sound like normal.

:: 06:35

That didn't seem like all the other kids. And if you've ever saw that great

:: 06:39

movie, Forrest Gump, those were the braces that he was talking about.

:: 06:44

No way. Oh, my God. And I was like, I mean, I'm getting picked on with crutches.

:: 06:51

I'm getting made fun of. I'm not able to do gym class with the kids.

:: 06:55

I'm like, you give me these braces on my leg. I am really going to have a tough time.

:: 07:00

So I he gave me the gift of two weeks to go visit my grandmother in Long Island,

:: 07:06

New York, and to take a break between surgeries, because the second part of

:: 07:10

the surgery is now the lengthening of my leg that they got it straight.

:: 07:14

And my grandmother, who is God bless her soul, is probably one of the wisest

:: 07:18

women I've ever met in my life, told me, she said, God made you this way,

:: 07:22

son, and you should stay this way.

:: 07:24

And those are the words that hit home for me at, and I just turned 13 and I've

:: 07:29

never had another surgery on my leg since because I truly believe that if this

:: 07:35

was my destiny, this is the way I was gonna live.

:: 07:37

And I went on to do some other amazing things, whether it's the athletics or

:: 07:40

working out, fitness, and we'll share with them a little bit of that later.

:: 07:43

But that is really the early years of my story of going through those two surgeries,

:: 07:48

those two major surgeries and coming to the epiphany that, you know what,

:: 07:51

we all have disabilities.

:: 07:52

We all have things that are a little bit different, but we have to embrace them

:: 07:56

and embrace those challenges so that we can move forward in life. Yeah.

:: 08:00

You know, God bless our grandmothers. Yeah.

:: 08:05

Absolutely. Yeah, man. Okay. So I have so many questions.

:: 08:11

So my first question is, so continuing on, the leg was now straight.

:: 08:17

Did it end up remaining straight even though you didn't wear the braces?

:: 08:21

Absolutely not. it went right back to the way it was.

:: 08:26

And I love that you shared that question because as over the years,

:: 08:29

it pretty much, I mean, I became well-versed in biomechanics and human anatomy.

:: 08:35

And I learned that it was a failure from the start.

:: 08:38

And that question that I asked the doctor purely was some inspired question.

:: 08:42

I don't even know how I came up with it at that age, but now knowing that you

:: 08:46

have to have a quad and a hamstring to have the knee flex and extend. in.

:: 08:49

And so it went right back. But what I will tell you is that that leg is, has been strong.

:: 08:55

I have a strong right glute and my lower back is tight at times,

:: 08:58

but it just functions in it. And we adapt.

:: 09:01

And that's something that I share with people all the time, whether it's speaking

:: 09:05

or coaching is that we have the ability to adapt to our, our surroundings.

:: 09:10

So our bodies can adapt and we can actually embrace those challenges and become

:: 09:14

stronger in other areas if we're willing to do the work. Yeah, absolutely.

:: 09:19

So now like today, are you able to walk on that leg?

:: 09:24

Absolutely. I walk, I ride a bike. I just finished riding a hundred miles for

:: 09:28

the multiple sclerosis ride here in South Florida.

:: 09:31

I work out five to six days a week. I've been a bodybuilder for the last 25 years.

:: 09:37

And I don't believe that the leg has stopped me from doing anything in this

:: 09:41

world that I want to do. Wow, wow, wow, wow. That is incredible.

:: 09:45

Last question about the leg, because this is just crazy.

:: 09:49

So as an adult, how much shorter is it than your other leg?

:: 09:55

So I'd like to say that I'm standing at six foot four now.

:: 10:01

I am a strong five foot three man with a three and a half inch difference in my right and my left leg.

:: 10:07

My left leg functions 100 percent perfect.

:: 10:10

And God bless that. That's the strong leg. I always say I have one good wheel. Yes.

:: 10:17

Amazing. So do you do you have like something with your shoes that helps to balance it out?

:: 10:22

No, I walk on my toes. so I never liked

:: 10:26

that the Herman Munster boot I had

:: 10:29

it when I was younger yeah and if you

:: 10:31

guys I mean we're all probably the same age so a lot of the listeners will

:: 10:34

understand that I never wanted that it made it very hard for me to do the things

:: 10:39

that I wanted to do as a kid I wanted to run and jump and and do and ride my

:: 10:42

bike and things and having that big plastic piece on the shoe inhibited that

:: 10:47

so I've never gone back to that I will share with the listeners that because

:: 10:51

Because I walk on my toe and I've run,

:: 10:53

I don't run as much anymore because I don't want to put that much wear and tear on the body.

:: 10:57

I do understand that we don't get a set. I can't go in for an oil change.

:: 11:02

So, you know, I do have a little arthritis in my right toe, which hurts at times.

:: 11:07

But, hey, you know what? A little pain for some gain is no problem with me.

:: 11:11

Yeah, absolutely, dude. So going back to your story, you spent that time with

:: 11:18

your grandmother. mother.

:: 11:19

You guys had this massive kind of epiphany,

:: 11:22

You reset your mindset. From there, I have two questions.

:: 11:27

I'm going to ask you both questions and you can go from there.

:: 11:30

My first question is, I know in my own situation, sometimes grandparents' ideas

:: 11:39

of what we should be doing is different than our parents.

:: 11:43

And so I'm curious when you went back home, what maybe your mom or dad or whoever

:: 11:49

thought about this idea? and then just kind of understanding how life as a kid went from there.

:: 11:57

As a parent and adult right now, I can tell you that my mother allowed me to make that decision.

:: 12:03

And it was a decision that I don't think she had a lot of knowledge and understanding

:: 12:08

of, but she could see the conviction.

:: 12:11

And like I said, my grandmother told me when she said those words that God made

:: 12:15

you this way and you're going to stay that way, there was no one on this planet

:: 12:18

that could have got me under the knife again.

:: 12:20

So it really wasn't a conversation. It was more of a conviction in it.

:: 12:24

Hey, this is what's going to happen.

:: 12:26

It's my body. It's my leg. And I'm blessed that my mom was willing to allow

:: 12:30

me to to make that very mature decision at the young age of 12 and a half, 13. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

:: 12:38

Amazing. Way to go, mom. I love it. So, so now getting back to you as a kid,

:: 12:44

I mean, cause you're still a kid.

:: 12:46

I mean, even though you're pursuing forward, you have something quote unquote wrong with you.

:: 12:51

I'm curious how it went the rest of kind of time in school.

:: 12:55

I mean, as far as bullying or you just doing life, how did it go?

:: 13:01

Yeah. So I wound up moving from upstate New York, living with my mother to living

:: 13:06

with my grandmother. After that decision, I wanted to be in Long Island.

:: 13:09

I just saw that it was a great opportunity for me to learn. They had more resources

:: 13:13

for me, things like that.

:: 13:15

So I started school that year in New York, in Long Island, and it started all

:: 13:21

over again. I mean, a new school, very affluent area on Long Island,

:: 13:25

and kids were kids, you know, they were a little bit mean.

:: 13:28

I wasn't as financially as fortunate as a lot of them.

:: 13:32

But what I will share is that the school district did a very good job at at

:: 13:37

least making sure that I didn't feel so disjointed.

:: 13:41

Being I was the only African-American student in the class at that time with

:: 13:45

a disability, they did the best they could.

:: 13:48

And then when I wanted to play sports, they tried to block me.

:: 13:51

So then my grandmother and I found a way around that by signing a letter at

:: 13:55

that time saying that we would not

:: 13:58

hold them responsible for anything that happened to me by playing sports.

:: 14:01

So then I was able to participate in gym and play soccer and do all the things

:: 14:06

that I wanted to do as a young boy, just kind of going through time. Yeah.

:: 14:10

Wow, wow, wow. Dude, that's incredible.

:: 14:13

Again, way to go, Grandma. I love it so much.

:: 14:17

Now, you talked about getting really big into fitness and stuff.

:: 14:22

When did that really take place?

:: 14:25

So I, it started pretty much about eighth grade and I saw, I got to see you

:: 14:30

and we all saw Arnold and, and all of those movies.

:: 14:34

And I learned that, you know, I said, if I'm going to have this disability,

:: 14:39

why not try to build the strongest body possible?

:: 14:41

And I had a, luckily I had a coach who was a wrestling coach and a track coach at the time.

:: 14:47

And he said, Hey, you know, you look like you could really do great things in the wrestling room.

:: 14:50

And at that time, I still believed that I I was going to be in the NBA.

:: 14:54

So I was like, well, I want to play basketball. Well, he let me have that dream until I got cut.

:: 15:01

And then he came back to me and said, hey, you know, you might be good in the wrestling room.

:: 15:07

And I could do some pull ups because I had crutches as a young kid.

:: 15:10

So my upper body had already started to develop.

:: 15:13

And I got into the weight room and I started to work out right then.

:: 15:16

And I've never stopped working out since I was 13. I worked out this morning at 6 a.m. Wow.

:: 15:21

That's incredible. man. Yeah. Wow. And so when you leading up into like the

:: 15:28

age of graduating school and stuff, I mean, what did you have plans to do after school?

:: 15:35

Yeah. So I got into wrestling and I became wrestling was that number one thing for me.

:: 15:40

School wasn't the thing because at that time I was struggling with academics

:: 15:44

because I was dyslexic and ADHD and I was undiagnosed.

:: 15:48

So when I didn't read a book really all throughout high school because I skipped

:: 15:53

the words because I couldn't comprehend and pronunciate them.

:: 15:56

And that struggle got me to have a wonderful 1.62 GPA leaving high school.

:: 16:02

So I was an academic gimmick, not star.

:: 16:07

Oh, my goodness. Yes. So so I'm assuming you maybe didn't have college plans when growing up along.

:: 16:15

Everybody was going to college. So I said, hey, that's just what I need to do.

:: 16:19

And I was blessed to luckily to have the wrestling.

:: 16:22

I got into college, went to that that big school that you shouldn't go to when

:: 16:27

you don't have anybody to tell you this is not the way to to go.

:: 16:30

Don't go sign all these papers and get all these loans.

:: 16:33

But I recognized quickly that I should go to junior college after signing up

:: 16:37

originally at a D1 school and putting myself in some deep debt, got out.

:: 16:41

And then about a year and a half into my college years of wrestling,

:: 16:45

I found myself financially strapped and I had to make a decision.

:: 16:49

Should I take care of my grandmother, get a job and do the things that I knew I needed to do?

:: 16:53

Or should I try to keep struggling in school. I dropped out of college at that point.

:: 16:58

And I started working and my first job was a personal trainer.

:: 17:04

Okay, so that's where that begins.

:: 17:07

Interesting. Yeah. Well, so I am curious about the personal trainer job because,

:: 17:13

you know, I mean, you mentioned, you know, you're only five foot three.

:: 17:17

We've talked about this issue with your leg.

:: 17:20

How was that being a trainer with with the people that you are working with?

:: 17:25

Would they gain inspiration from you?

:: 17:29

Would they be kind of in disbelief? Anything like that?

:: 17:34

Yeah. The first job I went to get, I remember a buddy of mine who was the most

:: 17:39

unathletic male on the planet.

:: 17:41

And he was a personal trainer.

:: 17:43

And his uncle was a the head manager there, the facility manager.

:: 17:47

So I'm like, oh, I know he can be a trainer. I can be a trainer.

:: 17:52

I went over, asked for the job, signed it. And he said, oh, we're not hiring right now.

:: 17:56

Now, I knew at that minute that he was bullshitting me.

:: 18:00

And the fact of the matter is that he basically was saying, hey,

:: 18:03

you know, you could work the front desk.

:: 18:05

And I took that job. I worked the front desk. I learned everybody's first name,

:: 18:09

last name, kid's name, everything. thing.

:: 18:11

And within a short period of time, people were seeing me at the gym. I became a gym rat.

:: 18:15

I was working out consistently, hanging there out and helping everybody in sight.

:: 18:19

Everybody who had a question, everybody who was struggling.

:: 18:23

And before you knew it, I had built up a pretty good name for myself as someone

:: 18:26

who could contribute and share inspiration when it came to their body and their fitness.

:: 18:31

And I had a full book within probably about four months.

:: 18:34

Wow. How long did you end up sticking with that? Yeah, I stayed at that first

:: 18:39

location for about a year and a half.

:: 18:41

And then I took the leap of faith and decided that I was going to join a gym

:: 18:45

in Manhattan because that's where, you know, the big money was.

:: 18:48

That's where all the celebrities and actors and athletes were.

:: 18:52

And I went in and got that my first job in New York Sports Club.

:: 18:56

And the rest is history, man. I fell in love with the human body.

:: 19:00

I fell in love with helping people transform their minds, understanding that

:: 19:04

if you were going to transform your body, it first started with the six inches between your ears.

:: 19:08

You're not going to do anything to your body if you don't believe in it.

:: 19:11

So I learned, I found, you know, personal development and Tony Robbins and the rest is history.

:: 19:19

Yeah. Oh, my. I think I think once anybody has the amazing experience of finding

:: 19:24

Tony Robbins, the rest is always history.

:: 19:29

Oh, my goodness. Now, at some point in time, I know, and I don't know at what

:: 19:35

age you were or anything, but I know at one point in time, your grandmother

:: 19:39

would pass away. Yeah. Yeah.

:: 19:43

Talk to me about that. Yes. So just so the listeners can follow the chronological

:: 19:47

story here, you know, I went on to do some big things in the fitness world and

:: 19:51

I fell in love with entrepreneurship and got my start of my own. I started my first gym.

:: 19:56

I'm working on Long Island, taking care of my grandmother. Life is good.

:: 20:00

And then she gets cancer and she has cancer in her liver and both of her breasts.

:: 20:05

And we had to make a tough decision.

:: 20:08

And I decided that we were going to just treat it naturally and allow her to

:: 20:11

have high life quality of life.

:: 20:13

And the last two and a half years of our life, we did a lot of things and we

:: 20:17

enjoyed Sunday lunches together and cooking.

:: 20:19

I moved there into my place. And in 2014, she passed away.

:: 20:24

And in that passing, she left me and brought me my amazing wife, Michelle.

:: 20:30

Oh, okay. Whoa. What do you mean?

:: 20:32

That sounds like a story. Yeah.

:: 20:35

The story goes, I mean, at this point, my grandmother was such a fighter.

:: 20:39

She was hanging on for dear life.

:: 20:41

And I, luckily I had a client at the time who was coming to my gym and just

:: 20:46

saw that one morning she asked me, she goes, how are you doing Rahz?

:: 20:50

And I was not used to people asking me how I was doing. I'm the person that

:: 20:54

asked you how you're doing. I'm there to inspire you and motivate you.

:: 20:58

And for the first time as a Leo and a male, I was never taught that you could

:: 21:03

be vulnerable. You could show that emotion.

:: 21:06

And I broke down. I started to almost cry. And she'd listened to me for about an hour.

:: 21:12

And I was like, wow, this is the first female that ever really hit that emotional trigger in me.

:: 21:19

And within a short period of time, we started dating and she was with me when

:: 21:23

my grandmother got sick in her final days.

:: 21:25

And I believe that that's why my grandma was willing to cross over because she

:: 21:29

knew that I was going to be taken care of by an amazing woman. Wow.

:: 21:32

What a beautiful story of such a sad moment it in your time,

:: 21:38

but you can look at it now and you can see this gift that was given to you almost

:: 21:44

by your grandmother. I think that's amazing.

:: 21:47

Yeah. Just one of the many gifts. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. I can only imagine.

:: 21:52

After that, did you stay in that part of town or did you move?

:: 21:58

Yeah. So for after that, we, a couple of my wife, well, she was my girlfriend

:: 22:03

at the time We decided that we were going to get a place together.

:: 22:06

And she had two amazing little boys. One was nine and 12.

:: 22:10

And we got a place and we started this chapter of my life of being a stepfather and a husband soon to be.

:: 22:18

And within a couple of years, we decided, you know what? I'm tired of the cold.

:: 22:22

My body is not made for snow.

:: 22:25

And we took a ride to Florida and we moved in 2018. We moved to South Florida here.

:: 22:31

And that's where we live today. day. Oh, wow. Amazing.

:: 22:34

Did you guys immediately like the transition or ever regret the choice?

:: 22:41

Man, never, never. I mean, I can't tell you that.

:: 22:45

There are a lot of things that people can, I mean, I think that if you want

:: 22:48

to make a heaven out of hell or a hell out of heaven, you can do it.

:: 22:51

And it starts with the six inches between your ears.

:: 22:53

So I choose to see everything as positive and awesome.

:: 22:58

And every morning I get to look out the sunny skies. I don't care if it's 110 degrees.

:: 23:02

It's okay. We have AC. Thank you fully. And it's great here,

:: 23:07

man. We love the ability to be outside and just do the things we want to do consistently.

:: 23:12

Yeah. Amazing. And I mean, knowing now what we know is two years later, the pandemic would hit.

:: 23:19

And ironically, you chose the best state to be in.

:: 23:23

You you're not lying, man. It was. And I tell people, you know,

:: 23:28

it felt like it really wasn't a pandemic because all we had to do was adjust

:: 23:33

occasionally. I mean, our state didn't want to wear masks.

:: 23:37

We didn't do anything. But in saying that, I truly think that,

:: 23:41

you know, everybody had felt the pandemic.

:: 23:44

I mean, I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing today for a profession had we not

:: 23:49

all had to endear and and and overcome something.

:: 23:53

And I had to close my gyms and really pivot my entire life within a short few months.

:: 23:59

Wow. So your gym. So did you open up more gyms down here in Florida?

:: 24:06

So when I, when I first got here in 2018, I did, I started a gym right here

:: 24:11

in the local town and we were kicking butt and taking names.

:: 24:14

And then, you know, the pandemic happened and everything shut down gym world,

:: 24:19

the theater world, a lot of the service-based, you know, businesses struggled.

:: 24:23

And I didn't think that we were going to be able to make it out of that.

:: 24:26

So I closed them, sold my equipment pennies on the dollar and really took a

:: 24:31

couple of weeks to go, you know, what is it?

:: 24:33

What's this chapter look like? And I did what I always do.

:: 24:36

Whenever I'm stuck, I go to a book, I go to a coach, I go to somewhere that's

:: 24:41

going to find some inspiration.

:: 24:43

And I realized that I didn't want to chase money. I didn't want to have to go and say, you know what?

:: 24:48

Oh man, how am I going to make my mortgage or rent?

:: 24:51

I wanted to do something that was going to inspire me to get up early,

:: 24:54

stay up late, and really just make an impact in this world.

:: 24:57

And I decided to write a book called Student Success Secrets.

:: 25:00

Okay, so not everybody just jumps to the idea of writing a book. What made you decide to,

:: 25:08

that you had to write a book and why on the topic that you chose?

:: 25:12

Oh, great question. So the reason the book was, it was the book that I needed at 13.

:: 25:17

I knew that if you were gonna create success in your life, there were specific principles.

:: 25:23

There are things that people who were successful did. And growing up without

:: 25:26

a father, growing up without any male role models in my life,

:: 25:30

I never had that North Star outside of my grandmother.

:: 25:34

And my grandmother had a second grade education. So she really couldn't expand

:: 25:37

my mindset when it comes to business and entrepreneurship and thinking big and outside of the box.

:: 25:44

And so I thought to myself, if I was 13, what are the principles?

:: 25:49

What are the secrets? What would I need to know?

:: 25:51

And within a couple of days, I sat down and these thoughts just started pouring

:: 25:55

out of me, Kevin. And within a short period of time, the book was done.

:: 25:59

My wife helped me write it. We got to co-author it together.

:: 26:03

And I knew instantly that this book was going to be the catalyst for the work

:: 26:07

that I do the rest of my life.

:: 26:09

Wow. That is pretty darn incredible. You know, man, I, I'm always a firm believer

:: 26:15

that even in the bad situations of life, good can come out of it if we choose.

:: 26:22

And you hear so many stories of people who turned this time of the pandemic

:: 26:29

when life as they knew it, their business as they knew it was destroyed.

:: 26:33

And then they, you know, went off in a different direction. The same thing that happened in my life.

:: 26:39

And so I think that's really amazing with you that you did that.

:: 26:45

I guess I'm wondering with this book, what exactly did you write?

:: 26:51

Like what in it? Is it a story? Is it a manual?

:: 26:54

How would you describe it? I would describe it as a playbook for success for

:: 26:59

creating a unstoppable mindset for a teenager.

:: 27:02

So it's seven secrets that specifically every teen, if they implement,

:: 27:08

can definitely develop a growth mindset and persevere through any challenges

:: 27:13

in their lives, whether it's bullying, whether it's self-esteem problems,

:: 27:17

whether it's just not liking themselves, or maybe their family life is a little bit of a struggle.

:: 27:22

Struggle these seven secrets within the book really

:: 27:25

outline exactly what to do how to do

:: 27:27

it and why you should do it and it gives you the ability

:: 27:30

to create it the way you want in your own unique self not the way i wrote it

:: 27:36

now the book has stories it has thinking questions it isn't basically a roadmap

:: 27:41

for figuring things out for yourself did you write it specifically thinking of the the...

:: 27:49

Student or also thinking about possibly the parent?

:: 27:54

It's turned into a manual for parents as well, but I wrote it with the student

:: 27:58

in mind because I felt like I was in the room by myself and I didn't have anyone to talk to.

:: 28:04

So when I wrote the book, I wrote it in language that they could understand,

:: 28:08

not in science-y stuff that we, you know, sometimes you read these books and

:: 28:12

you're like, oh, I need a dictionary just to figure out how to get through page

:: 28:15

two, you know, I really wanted them to go, oh, wow.

:: 28:19

And I made it into the length that I knew that anyone with a short attention

:: 28:23

span, because that's what I had, could get through 150 pages of the book. Okay. Okay.

:: 28:30

Incredible. Talk to me about how long did it end up taking you to end with a

:: 28:36

final product, this book, and then how did you begin to even promote it?

:: 28:41

Yeah. So it took, the writing of it was literally less than two weeks.

:: 28:46

Then we had to, you know, you got to get an editor, you got to get a framework,

:: 28:50

you got to get someone who's going to make sure it looks good.

:: 28:53

Once we did that, we were able to get a finished product within 90 days.

:: 28:58

And I had, in my background of fitness, I had mastered one skill set, which was marketing.

:: 29:03

So I understood how to self-publish. I had self-published two two other books

:: 29:07

prior to that in different niches.

:: 29:09

And I knew how to self-publish. So I was like, I'm going to self-publish this book.

:: 29:13

I'm going to go out there and I'm going to sling this book every way I know.

:: 29:16

From the back of my trunk, I'm going to tell anybody who wants to hear about it.

:: 29:19

And that is how we got to become an Amazon bestseller by just hustling,

:: 29:23

out hustling everybody in sight. Yeah.

:: 29:26

Amazing. Now, do you go and speak to schools or anything? thing?

:: 29:32

Yeah. So I used the book to, that was my original business plan.

:: 29:36

And once I thought about business, the first was just write the book.

:: 29:39

So I had no, like if I were to do it today, of course you should have things

:: 29:44

in the book that says, oh, this is how you could purchase more and in bulk.

:: 29:47

No, I just wanted, I had the in mind and the end user was the teenager who was struggling.

:: 29:52

But yeah, I've gone into schools and spoken all over the country.

:: 29:55

And now I utilize the book as There's a framework for a coaching program that

:: 30:00

I use with parents and teens.

:: 30:02

Okay, amazing. You know, man, I would only imagine given just your level of energy,

:: 30:10

Given the fact of you went through

:: 30:13

what you're teaching, I would imagine that kids really take to you.

:: 30:19

You know, that they, I would imagine that they feel comfortable listening to

:: 30:24

you and feel like you're somebody on their level who could relate with them.

:: 30:28

Do you find that to be true?

:: 30:29

I absolutely, I know that that's my gift. That's my superpower is my ability

:: 30:34

to be relevant in a teen's life. I don't come off as, you know,

:: 30:39

this adult male who knows it all.

:: 30:41

I try to do my best to connect with them on a deep level, speak their language.

:: 30:45

And I share I'm vulnerable with them where most adults struggle to be vulnerable

:: 30:50

with kids because they feel like the stigma they need to be a certain way.

:: 30:54

So when I'm working with a teenager, I connect with them and I share my life

:: 30:58

story, the good, the bad, and the prosperous times so that they can see,

:: 31:03

hey, it doesn't matter where you start.

:: 31:05

It doesn't matter the setbacks that you have. As long as you're willing to keep

:: 31:09

moving forward, you can create an amazing comeback. And that's what I feel like my life is.

:: 31:14

Yeah, absolutely. 100%. You say that parenting, and I guess this is obviously

:: 31:21

speaking to the parents, is a full-contact sport.

:: 31:25

Would you please explain what that means? Yeah, I'm a big sports fan.

:: 31:30

So, like, a lot of my analogies connect to sports.

:: 31:33

And when I think about parenting, especially parenting the modern teenager,

:: 31:37

it's a full-contact sport.

:: 31:39

And parents, you have to be willing to put on a helmet, put on a mouthpiece, and get into the game.

:: 31:44

And what does that mean? that means learning the language that your teens is speaking.

:: 31:48

That means really being willing to change your mindset, your parenting style

:: 31:53

to meet the demand that we have today.

:: 31:56

These kids have phones, they have the internet, they have so much exposure.

:: 32:01

And if you're still operating from a place back at Windows 7 back then when

:: 32:06

you were a child, you are not going to be able to parent today's modern teenager.

:: 32:11

And that just means when I say parenting is a full contact sport,

:: 32:14

you're going to get some banged up. You're going to get banged up.

:: 32:16

You're going to get some injuries.

:: 32:17

But if you're willing to bite down and push forward, you can help your kids

:: 32:21

navigate the confusing time of teenhood. Yeah, that's awesome.

:: 32:26

Would you mind sharing a little bit more, maybe about either the book or just

:: 32:33

some strategies, even in the coaching that you do, just to give somebody who's

:: 32:38

still unsure of exactly what

:: 32:41

what this would look like even working with you as a coach. Would you mind sharing

:: 32:44

a little bit deeper into what exactly you would do with them?

:: 32:49

Sure. Absolutely. So the first thing I'll share with you the book.

:: 32:53

So because one of the big things that I wanted to help teens shape is their mindset.

:: 32:58

And I fell in love with Carol Dweck's book, Mindset, years ago.

:: 33:02

And I've had some of the best coaches in the world help me shape my mindset.

:: 33:07

And there's three things that that parents need to really be willing to help their teens with.

:: 33:11

First thing, it's called the BAS method, their belief systems.

:: 33:16

They need to know where are these kids getting these belief systems,

:: 33:19

but most parents don't do enough reflecting to think where they get their belief systems.

:: 33:24

And so if we can reflect on our own belief systems, we can understand what we're

:: 33:29

passing down to the next generation.

:: 33:31

So helping their kid unpack belief systems, how would you do that? asking them questions.

:: 33:36

Why do you believe that, son? What are your beliefs on this?

:: 33:40

Where do you think you got that belief from? Do you believe that that's a fact or a story?

:: 33:46

Because when you help a kid get clear on their belief systems,

:: 33:50

now they can shift to the A, which is their attitude.

:: 33:53

Too often, we're seeing a lot of teenagers, and I say teenagers,

:: 33:56

but we're talking even at five to 10, their attitude is negative. I'm not enough.

:: 34:03

I'm not smart as him. I'm not as pretty as her. I'm not, I'm not.

:: 34:07

But if you don't change that attitude early on before that, it starts to get almost set in.

:: 34:12

You're going to have a struggle on your hands because these kids,

:: 34:15

which is going to lead to the S, which is that self-talk, right?

:: 34:19

If you're saying things about yourself and Kevin, I know you and I've had a chat before.

:: 34:22

If we were saying things about ourselves and about what we had to go through

:: 34:26

and how life was so terrible and how we We could you think we'd be here today

:: 34:30

with an open mind and positive?

:: 34:32

Most likely no. Right now. So the BAS method really helps parents and the teen

:: 34:38

shape the most important thing they need, which is their mindset,

:: 34:42

changing their beliefs,

:: 34:43

shifting their attitude and taking that negative self-talk and turning it into

:: 34:47

empowering affirmations that allow them to really see themselves in their unique

:: 34:52

abilities to move forward in life. Wow.

:: 34:55

You know what? I come back to that thing that I asked you about earlier, the full contact sport.

:: 35:01

The way that you talk about this is a way in which I don't know that most people

:: 35:08

think about parenting is like literally diving in,

:: 35:12

like headfirst into it all the way, uncovering the layers, uncovering the layers.

:: 35:18

The way you talk is just a way that, I mean, I've never even really thought about it.

:: 35:22

Yeah, I have to be. And in all honesty, here it is.

:: 35:25

You know, when you're blessed with two amazing boys and you don't have you don't

:: 35:29

have anything to go back on.

:: 35:31

There was no precedent on how Rouse is going to be a father.

:: 35:34

So I did. I read the books. I jumped in and I said, OK, how do I do this?

:: 35:38

And then I realized that I and you've heard me use the analogy of operating

:: 35:41

with I was operating with old program in Windows 7 at the time.

:: 35:46

I was like, oh, yeah, this is my house. and you got to do it my way and I'm the boss.

:: 35:50

You know why I had that programming? Because that's what I heard my mother's

:: 35:53

boyfriend say. That's what I heard my grandmother's boyfriend say.

:: 35:56

And I didn't want to parent that way. So I had to roll up my sleeves and be

:: 36:00

willing to go, okay, how do I peel this onion back and find out who Rahz is?

:: 36:04

What is his belief systems on parenting?

:: 36:06

And what kind of parent do I want to be? And how do I not be that parent who

:: 36:11

creates adverse childhood experiences that are negative in a child's life?

:: 36:15

How do I empower them so that they can become amazing adults in the future?

:: 36:21

And so I believe unequivocally that, you know, being a parent,

:: 36:26

you have to be willing to go, hey, I don't know something, but I'm willing to learn.

:: 36:30

I'm going to have an open mind. I'm going to learn that son,

:: 36:33

daughter, and I'm willing to do it with you and make it a collaborative effort,

:: 36:38

not something that we're just barking orders and lecturing, but we're doing

:: 36:42

it together. That is what parenting is.

:: 36:44

And that is how you become a successful parent with these kids.

:: 36:47

Because you know what? Every child is an individual. Yeah, absolutely.

:: 36:52

What about for, and you know this better than anybody, what about for the step parents out there?

:: 36:57

Because I know that can be a funny line that they're walking,

:: 37:02

especially if they're coming into a kid's life when they're older.

:: 37:07

Do you have any advice around that? Wow. That's I mean, that's not only is it a fantastic question.

:: 37:12

I thank you for asking me because it's probably one of my favorite questions.

:: 37:16

And the reason I say that is that it's such a gift. First and foremost,

:: 37:20

if you have the opportunity to step into a child's life and impact them,

:: 37:24

you have to embrace the fact that it's a gift.

:: 37:27

That's the first shift you need to have. And the second thing is you need to

:: 37:30

say, hey, let's have a time. You got to be patient.

:: 37:34

The biggest tip is be patient. You can't walk into the door and think,

:: 37:37

hey, I'm your father, I'm your mother.

:: 37:40

You have to be willing to say, hey, I want to be your friend first.

:: 37:43

And you got to develop rapport and you got to be willing to let them go through the process.

:: 37:47

And you have to release any doubt in your mind that you are going to impact

:: 37:53

this young person's life.

:: 37:55

And most importantly, you don't have to force it. Let it happen naturally.

:: 38:00

I love that very much. For somebody who has never heard about a coach like you

:: 38:07

before, what does it look like working with you?

:: 38:11

So, yeah, I mean, I can tell you that when I started, I came up with the term. Now I hear it a lot now.

:: 38:16

But, you know, if you're going to work with a parenting coach,

:: 38:19

a teen life coach, it's really it has is what it looks like for me is you're

:: 38:24

going to be I'm going to be part of your family's team.

:: 38:27

And I'm coming in and looking at, you know, looking under the hood and saying,

:: 38:30

hey, what's not working?

:: 38:32

What's working? What should we change? And usually it starts with what I call my three C's.

:: 38:37

The first thing is clarity. You got to get clarity in your parenting style.

:: 38:42

So I'm going to tell you, hey, this is what I see from your diagnostic.

:: 38:46

This is your parenting style. And from the reason that we're on this call or

:: 38:51

we're meeting right now is that your parenting style has some faulty programming.

:: 38:55

So we need to make some shifts. And here is what we need to do here.

:: 38:58

I'm going to meet with the kid, build some rapport, learn about the kid.

:: 39:01

And then I'm going to say, hey, you know, here are the things that you need to work on.

:: 39:04

And then together, we're going to put the plan together. And it's social emotional learning.

:: 39:09

But when you have that first C, which is clarity, then we're going to work on

:: 39:13

communication, essential communication, so that we're not talking,

:: 39:17

but we're listening more than we're talking.

:: 39:19

And we're learning the child specific way of taking information in,

:: 39:23

as well as how they want to be spoken to.

:: 39:26

Some kids can be spoken to like, hey, you want to win?

:: 39:29

Get up, let's go work out. But if you raise your tonality at some kids,

:: 39:33

it's going to make them shrink.

:: 39:34

And if you don't know that about your child and you're using that style,

:: 39:38

you're doing more harm than you're doing good, even though you believe your

:: 39:41

intentions are to motivate them and inspire them.

:: 39:44

And that last part is building your own parental confidence as well as your child's confidence.

:: 39:50

So you have the clarity, the communication and confidence.

:: 39:53

That is how you become an empowered parent.

:: 39:55

And when you're an empowered parent, you can empower and inspire your child to become unstoppable.

:: 40:00

Wow, dude. Amazing.

:: 40:03

My question, as I was listening to you, I kept just coming back to the one thought in my mind.

:: 40:11

Where did this passion come from? Because we're not just talking about bullying,

:: 40:17

something you were experiencing.

:: 40:19

But I mean, it's one thing to write a book on this.

:: 40:23

It's one thing to do that. But to speak with your level of passion and conviction

:: 40:28

over the stuff that you do, where do you feel like that comes from?

:: 40:33

I believe we're all blessed with a superpower, a gift.

:: 40:36

And some of us miss our gift because we're not willing to be quiet enough or

:: 40:41

to just sit with it and say, hey, what is the gift that I have?

:: 40:45

I had the dream of being in the NBA, but that wasn't my gift.

:: 40:49

Right, I've shit with everybody that before. So my gift is my ability to connect

:: 40:55

and to inspire and motivate people.

:: 40:58

So I know that if I'm going to do that, I have to be the best I can.

:: 41:03

And I go back to an early mentor who changed my life, Tony Robbins.

:: 41:08

And the reason I learned from him at an early stage, he always said that if

:: 41:12

you want to learn something, you don't go to the eighth best person to learn from.

:: 41:18

You don't go to the 10th best or the second. You go to the best person you know

:: 41:22

who can teach you what they've done so that you can learn it and come back and bring it to your people.

:: 41:27

And that's what I did. I really just, I didn't know any parenting coaches.

:: 41:32

I didn't know anyone who did the way I did. I didn't want to go and say,

:: 41:35

oh, I'm a psychologist. I'm a licensed clinical specialist. I'm a therapist.

:: 41:38

Kids don't want to go to another therapist. And I never wanted to go because

:: 41:42

I didn't think I was broken.

:: 41:43

Most people, when you go to these people, they make you feel like you're broken and need fixing.

:: 41:48

And when I'm coaching a parent, I'm letting them know that their child is special.

:: 41:53

Their child is unique. Their child is a gift.

:: 41:56

I'm not fixing them. I'm just giving you some tool sets. I'm going to share

:: 42:00

with you a few different mindsets. And together, we're going to inspire this

:: 42:04

kid to step into their greatness, how they are.

:: 42:07

And when you give a child and a parent these tools, they can see and have hope

:: 42:12

that there is an opportunity for them.

:: 42:14

And it doesn't matter if they're an A student or they're a D student,

:: 42:18

because grades don't matter.

:: 42:19

We teach about the mindset and how you can move forward and find your gift.

:: 42:22

So my passion comes from that superpower, that place of, hey,

:: 42:27

I'm embracing something that just is within me.

:: 42:29

And then I'm willing to go find the information and the knowledge I need to

:: 42:33

take it to the next level.

:: 42:35

Rahz, I'm not even a parent and I'm like, man, I need some more of this guy in

:: 42:40

my life because just listening to you, man, I'm like, man,

:: 42:44

I ain't got no kids, but man, am I, I'm going to be having to do some stuff

:: 42:47

with my little dog, Sophia, with what this guy is teaching.

:: 42:53

Oh man, for somebody who wants to learn more about what you have to offer,

:: 42:59

who wants to find your book, where's the best places for us to send them? Yeah, man.

:: 43:03

I mean, if you want to find the book, you can go on Amazon.

:: 43:06

It's Student Success Secrets, Unlock the Seven Secrets for Inspiring,

:: 43:10

Motivating, Success-Driven Teens.

:: 43:12

And if you want to connect with me, it's theunstoppableteenager.com.

:: 43:16

That's a place where you can go and learn all things parenting,

:: 43:19

teen life coaching, as well as just coming and hanging out with us and learning

:: 43:23

how we can all make an impact in some young person's life.

:: 43:27

Yeah, dude. Man, Rahz, it's been a real pleasure today getting to hear your story,

:: 43:32

but more so than even your story,

:: 43:35

to be honest with you, it's hearing how just lit up you are inside,

:: 43:42

how passionate you are about what you get to do.

:: 43:46

And again, you know, we talked about, you know, good coming from the bad and,

:: 43:50

you know, the pandemic and totally changed directions, but I feel like it changed

:: 43:57

for the good because it landed you right your superpower.

:: 44:00

Yes, sir. Absolutely. I think that I have been coaching for over two and a half decades,

:: 44:05

but now I'm coaching the individuals and the people that I feel like can make

:: 44:11

the biggest and most impactful impact in their lives for the future.

:: 44:15

And one of the things that I always knew is that you don't want to just have

:: 44:18

the time you're here. You want

:: 44:20

to make sure that you leave this place a better place than you came in.

:: 44:23

And this opportunity definitely provides me that benefit.

:: 44:26

Yeah, dude. Amazing. Dude, thank you for being here so much.

:: 44:31

Do you have any final parting words before we close out today?

:: 44:35

I want to thank you for allowing me to share my story.

:: 44:38

I really do appreciate it. It's an honor to be on your podcast and on your platform

:: 44:43

and sharing this powerful story.

:: 44:45

And I always leave with one of my favorite quotes by the amazing Helen Keller.

:: 44:50

Life is either a daring venture or nothing at all. So I wish that you all go

:: 44:54

out there and and create your most daring and adventurous life.

:: 44:57

Thank you. Absolutely amazing.

:: 44:59

For you listening today, I hope you are smiling as big as I am right now because,

:: 45:06

well, this guy is absolutely incredible.

:: 45:10

So please be sure to check out today's show notes.

:: 45:13

I will leave links to all of the places he mentioned where you can get plugged

:: 45:17

into his world, find his book on Amazon.

:: 45:20

All of that is in the show notes today for easy access.

:: 45:24

And with that, I leave you with one mission to get out there and enjoy the day.

:: 45:30

Music.