Artwork for podcast FINE is a 4-Letter Word
66. (S2E30) The Minister of Dance with Karen Oeser
Episode 661st September 2022 • FINE is a 4-Letter Word • Lori Saitz
00:00:00 00:39:52

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Energized is seemingly Karen Oeser’s natural state, as you will hear. A big part of Karen’s story is about turning trauma into triumph. It’s pretty cool to hear a revelation she gets in real time, as we’re talking, about a past incident. I love when this happens on the show!

Karen’s also sharing her journey through several serious health conditions that she’s managed through alternative modalities. There’s a big focus on a favorite topic of gratitude in this one too. And how to use it – as well as some other techniques – to make yourself instantly feel better and raise your vibration. Plus how to then multiply blessings and send their positive energy out into the world.

A passionate financial literacy advocate, Karen bridges the skills gap between financial advisors and their female clients and prospects. She’s also a dream igniter who uses dance to help people wake up their inner passions so they can overcome their mind blocks and step into financial freedom.

Today’s episode is sponsored by Zen Rabbit. If you’d like to find peace of mind amidst the chaos and no matter what’s going on around you, get on a complimentary call with me. In less than 30 minutes, you’ll get insight on any issue you’d like to bring to the table. And you’ll leave the conversation with clarity and renewed energy. Find the booking link HERE. Or text me at 571.317.1463.

Karen’s hype song is Gonna Fly Now - Rocky Orchestra

Website: www.finliteracyforher.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karen-oeser-dream-igniter/

Transcripts

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[00:00:16] Karen Oeser: Thank you. I'm so happy here. I love your show. And I'm so privileged that you've asked me to be a

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[00:00:32] Karen Oeser: Exactly. I brought my energy girl.

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[00:00:43] Karen Oeser: it's

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[00:00:44] Karen Oeser: the whole time. I got my background music.

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[00:01:02] Karen Oeser: Oh my God. What a perfectly phrased question. Wow. I was just talking about that this weekend. I was actually originally gonna approach this a different way, but I'm gonna take this another way. So, because one of the things is my son was coming up with the issue. He's really, really mad at his brother. And he is like, mom, I can't stand this.

What should I do? And I said, you know what? I'm gonna tell you about blaming people effectively. and one of the things you do when you blame effectively is you think about how somebody pissed you off so much, where they brought you to their knees, that it really made you dig deep into who you are and, and what makes you tick.

And then you get to thank them. Thank you so much for being such a jerk. you that, that now I know who I am because I wasn't dependent on your opinion anymore. I had to go into myself. I wasn't dependent on it anymore. So all I'm asked to say is I was, I had a lot of things to blame effectively growing up.

and that is, yeah. Yeah. So that's why it's kind of a backdoor question, an answer to your question. But the thing is that there's a lot of negativity in my house, you know, and one of the things I've been talking about a lot is. what I, what I do in my business is I really help people overcome their money blocks and think about, you know, where did I get these money messages?

Or where did I give up my dreams or, or all of that. So one of the things I do is I think go back to what were the things that you heard as a child that aren't serving you? Well, like, for example, for me is my father is somebody who didn't use money wisely. In fact, he used it to her and used people. So I made a vow as a, as a young girl to.

If that's what bringing money into my life looks like I never wanna hang onto it. So here I am, 25 years in the business, you know, rising, you know, I even crashed through the glass ceiling. It was an amazing career. I couldn't save my money to save my life. I, I, and it wasn't until I left the industry and started to explore what mattered to me and what was important to me is then I realized that's where the origin of it. And so, and so there are lots of these messages that I grew up with. You know, one of the things girls can't do math. So what do I do? I have a financial literacy company. There are all these things that, that for years I, I hated on my dad just to, you know, call it for what it is. I was angry at him. I was like, how dare this?

You know, I see all my friends, daddy's little girl, all that other stuff. I didn't, that, that, wasn't my story. but what's happened is I've been able to re to, to, to reframe that energy and to turn it in, you know, cuz one of my catch phrases is turning trauma into triumph. And so that's what I like to do with it is that I try to every message that I get that comes into my consciousness because one of the things I started to do too, is that I don't, I don't force what truth needs to.

Into my path at that moment, because that's a lot of times when, if you're not ready for a truth, it could actually do you more harm sometimes. And so that's one of the ways I I've really been able to honor saying, okay, God, what

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[00:04:08] Karen Oeser: I need today?

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[00:04:11] Karen Oeser: And what am I gonna do about

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[00:04:23] Karen Oeser: well, what happens is you'll get angry with it. If it does come. you know, and so sometimes what happens is, you know, a really good thing that has been, I've been is kind of a pattern that I've been noticing. You know? Cause a lot of times I was angry that a door sh you know, closed in my face. I'm like, those were my people I thought, you know, and you get the whole mean girl, you know, thing.

Right. And, and it's like, what's, what's this going on? What's this all about? Then I realized like, oh my God, I was saved from something I wasn't ready for, or a group that wasn't my right people. I am so grateful for that. And so. And so that's when I stopped chasing truth, because the truth, because what happens is you have your idea what truth should be.

So, you know, our we're designed, you know, us as humans, the way our

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[00:05:11] Karen Oeser: brain, go look for

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[00:05:13] Karen Oeser: for assholes, you're gonna find assholes. Right? Our brain guys are well on truth. Exactly. Exactly. And so, um, you know, so when you're focusing on, I I've decided what truth I'm trying to justify.

That's what gets us in trouble. Cuz then we fall into, this is what I call it. Expectations, gap, cuz I had this

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[00:05:35] Karen Oeser: like. I fallen a hole. Now I hate

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It's uh, an expectation that you've created. It may not be your deep, inner voice truth. There's a differentiation there.

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But what, but when you're chasing a truth, you know, and as often comes from hurt, you know, is you're trying to justify while you're hurt, you know, go through all your angry feelings. And we spend so much time trying to chase a, a truth. I say it, air

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[00:06:48] Karen Oeser: you know, a truth to justify that. And then we will find it. Versus it's like, what truth do I need today?

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[00:07:15] Karen Oeser: God. I, I think I know what you're I think, you know, and, and you're right. And I actually, you know, this is great, cuz you're actually pointing out because I actually mean it in two ways, even though I'm using in a singular way, it's kinda like the, you know, you and you is a singular or plural cuz we do, we all have our inner truth.

Who are we? Who are we created

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[00:07:32] Karen Oeser: But if we only have that in a vacuum,

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[00:07:44] Karen Oeser: But we're talking about your conscious level though, right? It's you have your truth inside, but it's how it gets processed in your

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And

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[00:08:31] Lori Saitz: yeah. Yeah. Actually, and I've been working with a. On energy healing and, and shockers and stuff. And she, I was just looking over some notes the other day and she was saying how, how the percent, I can't remember now it was like 72% or something, a lot, um, of the messages that come to you never make it from your heart to your head.

They only 82. Okay. Thank you. Great.

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Cuz there was a piece of me that knew that I needed to sit still. But all these barriers that I put up kept me from that truth. So it's like, I knew there was a truth in there that that was just dying to

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[00:09:38] Karen Oeser: But I had, I was, you know, I was living outta my intellect

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[00:09:44] Karen Oeser: my world was defined by my intellect.

So that was a safe place to live

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Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Okay. So you started talking about the

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[00:10:19] Lori Saitz: called fine, is the four letter word, is that where you were like, yeah, everything's fine in my world. And up until that point, like give me the, give me the story, the quick story between. You know, you grew up with these beliefs and then the car accident.

There's like a big span in there. Where, where was everything fine?

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As I think about it, I was, I was, I was in a terrible marriage and I was working in London in the time and he would come in for the weekend long weekends. We were doing a long distance marriage. I was in Bo, he was in Boston and I was in London and. um, wow. Whew. We're catching us something real time here.

So, um, so yeah, so he was, so once a month I would drop him off at the, at the, at the tube, at the train station to send him off to Gatwick airport. And I literally, I, I, I'm not kidding you. I literally put my hand over my face. Like I was pulling down a mask and I say, okay, game on. I'm fine. and everybody asked me, how am I?

I actually gave it the car accident, but that's when that's when it, there was a piece in my consciousness about that I was doing something actively, but at that time I didn't have the strength to do much about it. So I just, you know, I lived in that mask world and then I got in this car accident and I didn't the thing, what I'm realizing.

Oh, wow. What I'm realizing right now. I'm yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm a flower. So I'm flowing now. So. . Yeah. So what happened is I realized I literally did not have the strength to pull down the mask. That's what it was. I literally, cuz it got my spine. I was laying there in the car and I actually said, God, apparently you want me to sit still?

That was my first response. I got the memo. And in that moment I wasn't angry. I was actually grateful. Cause I'm like, because there's no other way. I would've gotten there and I got there and it got my attention. So I had made a decision at that point that I wasn't going to let this destroy me. I was gonna use this to grow me.

So I was on my back for 12 weeks and I gave me a lot of times where, you know, and, and I would never let anybody help me ever, cuz I had been self protecting and I was forced to learn how to. Because I didn't know how to receive. I had to be in control. You know, I, I grew up along, you know, as a lifelong Anex up until that point.

So that actually, you know, can that's about control, you know, living in your head, anorexic is all about living in your head to protect yourself. I didn't have the strength to, to fall into any of my vices

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[00:13:27] Karen Oeser: and the after the car accident. I was to, you know, I, people were, you know, the food was coming in. I couldn't pull down the mask.

I couldn't, I couldn't push people away because even if I wanted to, I

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[00:13:54] Karen Oeser: No, to him. It's, it's, it's really actually interesting to him. he was somebody who, you know, basically didn't hear me, see me, understand me. So in my mind, I was invisible when he was around, but I was, I mean, I had an incredibly powerful job. One of the biggest banks in Switzerland, I actually was managing their most profitable product yet on the weekend.

It was every six week, every six weeks. I felt invisible for four days. And then. When it's like consciousness, I was like, I wanna be seen it's like, this is the mask I want them to see. Yeah. Yeah. And so, and so when I was laying there in the, the car accident is, you know, it was like, I didn't have the strength to even like, consciously think about being invisible or anything.

It just was actually, you know, wow. Putting it into words that a lot of people understand. It's almost like I was forced into present. I had to be present in that moment. Cause I didn't have the energy to fantasize future or live in the past. I was forced

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It's

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[00:15:18] Lori Saitz: right, because you have,

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[00:15:23] Lori Saitz: Practiced or somehow grasped the concept of becoming naturally grateful. So of course you saw the gratitude in that moment, but that's not that doesn't come naturally to everyone and I'm willing to bet it didn't come naturally to you throughout your whole life. You learned it somewhere along the way.

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[00:16:10] Lori Saitz: what was it? That got you to the point where you were able to see gratitude, cuz it, when the accident it was, it must have been before the accident, right? Because you're saying when you were in the accident, you immediately went to gratitude.

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And in fact, you know, a lot of my friends call

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[00:17:04] Karen Oeser: me the worst situation and I will find a blessing in it. Uh, you know, did you, did you. yeah. You know, did you see born identity? Oh my gosh. You have to see it, especially after I tell you this, but basically what he does is, um, literally he can go anywhere and he can just like, you know, go and, and look, look at he's basically he is assassin is what he is.

Um, but what he can do in order to be a really good assassin, you have to be able to not be distracted by anything around, be laser focused. And so you could be in a crowd of a million people, but you see your target and that's all you. and so, and so it's like, when I look at things, it it's with that ability, but I look for blessings and, and it comes so naturally to me.

I literally can't help myself. I mean, it's like, you know, some people kind of have like the O C D I need to clean my house, or I need to do that. I do that with

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[00:18:00] Karen Oeser: I do it. I'm just doing it on the

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[00:18:23] Karen Oeser: Yeah.

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[00:18:49] Karen Oeser: Absolutely.

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[00:18:54] Karen Oeser: And it's fun. It's joy. I mean, it, I it's, it's a game it's so much fun and you know, and the other big things I've learned, and this is a, you know, a reason why I don't carry any anger, anything about, you know, the, the people have come in my path path in the past is because as humans, we learn by point of contrast and we are experiential people and we watch case studies.

We observe. So. It's in order to understand this blessing that I had. I was in such a, it it's almost like equidistant, right? What, whatever you become deep in, most people experience the opposite of it, which is why, you know, you, you have somebody who has died of, you know, uh, you know, cancer or, or, you know, a kid with drug addiction or something.

They be, people become that becomes their mission in trying to help that. But it's. You know, if somebody who hasn't dealt with drugs tries to help you with drug addiction, people won't hear from 'em cuz it's like, until you've walked in my shoes, I can't hear you. You can't, we cuz we all wanna be, feel seen, heard, and understood.

And so to have that power and to have that impact and that passion it's, it's part of how it's almost by design that we've had a point of contrast. And cuz what you find is that people have had the worst of the worst. Tend to be the most powerful in terms of the blessing in terms of finance and stuff, because it was like the, like I said, I see it almost like I'm seeing like at a rainbow, as I'm speaking to, you know, it's like

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[00:20:22] Karen Oeser: really appreciate the journey over that arc.

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[00:20:45] Karen Oeser: You know, when you really go with the impact is, you know, I was, I was so happy because the same son who I had the conversation. Um, just a couple days ago. He's like, mom, thank you. So, so, so, so much for sharing that story with me, he's like, thank you for he's like I'm so God glad that God gave me you to be my guide to help me through this cuz he's 20 years old.

And then he says to me that, um, that he wants to, uh, the. He's he's, he's in, he's in a, in a, um, he's studying something. That's gonna be very, very lucrative and he has got a great business mind anyway. And so he says one of the reasons I wanna invest really well in all that is he says, because I wanna, you know, I wanna sew into other people.

I wanna serve the world. He's like, but mom, you know what? At the end of the day, if I have just made one person feel like their time on earth was worth it, he's like everything else is a victory. And I said, Tim, you are a. Wise boy, man, it's 20 years old to say that because when you think it's like, is that embarrassment, which will be over momentarily.

If I could have impacted somebody's life because they, they saw my story, their story in my

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[00:21:56] Karen Oeser: every.

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[00:22:06] Karen Oeser: No.

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[00:22:08] Karen Oeser: No, not exactly. No. I, I had quite a windy road because yes, exactly. So it happened after that. So the car accident was in August then, um, around,

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[00:22:24] Karen Oeser: better and then come the middle.

Oh, no, no, no. I, I, I, I,

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[00:22:34] Karen Oeser: Carolina now, so I'm oh yeah, yeah, no, no, no, that, that,

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[00:22:43] Karen Oeser: the London was in the, you know, late 1990s. So yeah, I said it currently been stateside. Yeah, no, no, no problem. Yeah. I've been stateside, you know, since, uh, year, 2000, so. so anyway, um, I got so around mid-January and, you know, and, and, you know, so my husband, I mentioned, we, you know, we are, we are in a terrible, terrible, terrible divorce.

It was ugly, ugly, ugly. And that, that was part of this whole awakening for me as well. And so about mid-January I was taking my oldest son to, um, his dad's house, which was our marital home. I got lost. I didn't know where I was. I started to lose my memory. And I had to get adult daycare and everything.

They didn't know what was wrong with me. And in fact, at one point they just thought I was crazy. And part of the thing was I started to lose a ton of weight. And so they all thought I'd relapse into anorexia. And so nobody believed me that something was going on and I eventually found out it was Lyme disease.

And, you know, and you know, but what the Lyme disease had taught me is with Lyme disease is when, whenever you have a flare, it can take you out for a. Or it could take you out for months and you often don't even have a warning. You just wake up. But again, it taught me to live in presence and it's like, okay, cuz I don't know tomorrow, if I'm going to be fine, unfortunately, you know, I'm in good shape.

And you know, we we're beyond that. But during that time had I not had that extreme experience, I wouldn't have had a chance to practice what I, you know, I had the car accident to experience it once it's like, I gotta practice. with, with, with the Lyme and then not long after that, I was diagnosed with third stage

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[00:24:30] Karen Oeser: well, yeah, exactly.

You know? Well, exactly. So, uh, that's why, I'm glad I, you know, I got this whole blessing finder thing. It's a much happier way to live. And so, you know, during that. You know, it really came to terms like, am I afraid to die? It makes you come to terms with death and how do I feel about that? And it's like, well, I'm gonna either be, you know, be delivered, go to heaven.

I'm good with either outcome. So whatever my purpose is. And so that, that at that point was when I started to seek what is my. And so the two things kind of prepared me to like, it's like, what am I, who am I, you know, and, and all, all the things up from profession to who I am as character, you know, all thing, all aspects of it, you know?

And, and I did a ton of, and I actually did the, um, cancer treatments. Alternatively. And so, um, so I was really into energy healing. I did, you know, all, it was all alternative modalities. And so I've never, you know, I never had chemo or radiation or anything. And yeah. And so one of the things that you have is you have to get infusion a lot of infusions. And so you're getting vitamin C cuz you know, cancer is just about our body being outta homeostasis. So something is outta balance and our bodies were created to communicate with. You know, and, and that's actually, one of the reasons the doctor said I was crazy is when I was having issues with my liver and I said, I can feel my liver.

And they said, you don't have nerves in your liver. And I said, well, I don't care what you say. I can feel my liver and cuz I I'm really in tune. I can feel, you know, I can even feel if I think about it, I can feel my blood flowing. And so that's part, part of this stuff. And so that's also one of the things my body has been used as a way to communicate and talk to other people.

And so what happened is like getting, I was getting all those infusions and I was at an infusion center for three years. And when it first started, I was doing it five days a week. Then it was four days. And this went on for about five years. And what happened was during that time, I was able to share the story that I'm sharing with you over and over.

And so there'd be people, you know, had, you know, about five to eight chairs depending on which center I was at. And there were people who three years later came up and had the courage to ask me a question. Cause they're like, I've heard your story, but I've been quiet over here, but I have a question for you.

And it just, and it's like, well, if all these people got this healing

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[00:27:05] Karen Oeser: this was

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[00:27:19] Karen Oeser: Exactly in their learning. So do I wanna do do when somebody, when they're watching me, do I wanna teach 'em bitterness or do I wanna teach 'em a gratitude. And what, and what I know is because when you live in gratitude, as you know, is, is a as a student of

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[00:27:37] Karen Oeser: see that.

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[00:27:50] Karen Oeser: and then people wanna be around that because even if they can't. Their finger on it. They're like, so people are like, I want what you have. Tell me about it. You know, it's like, I can't even put my finger, you know, when I start talking, you know, a lot of times they get on an idea, but they're just

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[00:28:07] Karen Oeser: wanna be around that.

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So like for no other reason to practice gratitude, it just makes you feel good.

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That was another one. It's like, I'm gonna trust who needed to receive my smile today was the one who was intended to receive my smile today. And if that other person wants to be grumpy and fine that's so be it. It's not, and I, I don't need that return to of affirmations, you know, it's nice cuz you get 'em and it's you.

Who doesn't like to have confirmations once in a while, but it's just fun to know that just being

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[00:29:29] Karen Oeser: do it

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[00:29:43] Karen Oeser: Yeah. Well, I I'm. Yeah, well, I'm a licensed minister of dance and so that's my prayer language. And so that's what I do every day. Um, I dance anywhere from, well, every morning I dance for about two hours and sometimes I tend not to dance so much at night, although in my mind and it's and a lot what I tell people, and I do this a lot when I do my challenges is I incorporate movement into everything because when we're moving, it's you can't be depressed when you're moving, just by moving your arms.

And every one of us. Um, our, our movements are as unique as our thumbprint. And when you get to know your body, you start being, you know, you, you really start to get to know yourself a little bit more and you can actually, you know how you do word associations. You're like, you know, say saying, clap and do it.

You can do that with movement and you can learn about yourself cuz I'm somebody who's a sprinter. I loved to go all. And I actually went to college on a, on a, on a track scholarship. I found out after doing this exercise, all my moves come out to sprinting moves. They're all sprinting muscle. That designed who I am.

And so, you know, and so what I do, and so often what I do is, you know, so just me, it's like, you know, just kind of me and God when I dance, but I'm open to whatever the day has for me. And it's like, God realign me to where I need to be today. And then I look over my schedule for the day and I, that's how I dance and I pray over like I dance and prayed over you this morning because it's like, whoever I come into contact today, I wanna bless them.

And may, whatever they need today comes their. and, and so that way I know, and, and sometimes I will just feel like I need, sometimes I'll call them and say, I really wanna let you know. And a hundred percent of the time I've responded to that, you know, internal, let them know 100% of the time they needed it.

And there were actually two people who are suicidal, who are like, thank you. You literally saved my life today. And that's part of, I don't care. They're like, even if you know, dancing, isn't my thing. I don't. but you know what, one day you're gonna, you know, you'll know that somebody cared enough to call in.

Actually I

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And I love that whole idea.

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[00:32:32] Lori Saitz: Absolutely.

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Smile. And for me, I know, you know, Dan says movement, you're creating energy. It flows, it puts things out in the atmosphere. And I just know I have faith. That's gonna get to who it needs to go to. And whatever I need to know in my

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[00:32:58] Karen Oeser: I'll let the spiritual world do what the spiritual world does.

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So what's your, what's your go-to song.

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[00:33:44] Lori Saitz: If someone wants to

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[00:33:47] Lori Saitz: about anything we talked about today, how do they re best reach you?

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And also, um, one thing is I've written a book called mind of gold, a girlfriend's guide to financial freedom and it's on Amazon. And it's a lot of it is about finding your purpose because when you find your

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[00:34:36] Karen Oeser: will line up with you

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[00:34:39] Karen Oeser: around which most people

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[00:34:50] Karen Oeser: abs. Oh, awesome. Thank you for having me. It's been great.

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