In this episode, I delve into the intrinsic challenges of entrepreneurship and the myriad setbacks that accompany the journey of personal and professional growth. We explore the notion that success is not merely a product of external achievements but is deeply rooted in the development of one's inner self. I share insights derived from my experiences mentoring young men, emphasizing the crucial importance of mindset, accountability, and the avoidance of a victim mentality. Furthermore, I identify seven critical factors that, if addressed, can lead to a more fulfilling and productive life, both personally and in business. Ultimately, this discourse serves to inspire listeners to cultivate resilience and take decisive action towards their goals, thereby fostering meaningful contributions to their communities. The discussion initiates with an exploration of the inherent challenges faced by entrepreneurs, particularly emphasizing the necessity of resilience amidst adversity. Adam Marburger articulates that the journey of entrepreneurship is fraught with unpredictable setbacks, including personal losses and professional obstacles. He poignantly recounts his own experiences of grief and loss, which serve as a backdrop to his insights on maintaining a positive mindset. The narrative stresses that while external circumstances may often seem insurmountable, cultivating a strong internal foundation and surrounding oneself with a supportive circle can significantly influence one’s capacity to navigate these challenges. Marburger elucidates the importance of accountability and self-awareness, encouraging listeners to confront their shortcomings rather than adopt a victim mentality. As the episode progresses, Marburger delineates seven specific behaviors that can impede personal and professional growth. Among these is the detrimental 'woe is me' mindset, which he identifies as a significant barrier to success. He emphasizes the urgency of recognizing and addressing such attitudes, advocating for a proactive approach to personal responsibility. The dialogue further engages with the theme of action-taking, asserting that mere contemplation without execution is an exercise in futility. Marburger’s impassioned call to action resonates throughout the episode, urging listeners to embrace decisiveness and take substantial risks in the pursuit of their aspirations. The overarching message remains clear: success is not merely a product of favorable circumstances but rather the result of deliberate actions and an unwavering commitment to personal development.

Takeaways:

• The essence of entrepreneurship lies not in the external achievements but in the internal growth necessary to navigate the journey effectively.
• A victim mindset can severely hinder personal and professional development, necessitating self-awareness and accountability to overcome.
• Taking responsibility for both successes and failures is critical for growth; it fosters an environment of learning and accountability.
• Massive action is paramount in transforming ideas into reality; without it, potential remains unfulfilled and opportunities are squandered.

This is Adam Marburger.

And this is humans that build real conversations with real people, not just about what they've built in the world, but what had to be built inside them first.

No hype, no shortcuts.

Just humans doing the work.

Humans that build.

Real people.

Real work.

Welcome to another episode of Humans that Build.

I'm your host, Adam Marburger.

This show is designed to share stories from super humans, people making a difference, those that are building great things so we can impact the community and then the world.

So today's going to be a little different.

I don't have a guest for you today.

I am your guest.

I've got something that's been really pulling my heartstrings.

I've had a couple of opportunities to mentor young men, and I'm going to share some of the things that I've shared with them recently that I think will provide some value.

I'll start with saying that this world of entrepreneurship, being in business, it's not all unicorns and rainbows, right?

We're going to go through seasons.

There's going to be setbacks.

There's going to be personal situations that kind of take you off the track.

There's going to be bad health reports.

There's going to be death in the family.

There's going to be employees that go rogue.

There's going to be economies that shift.

There's going to be clients that cancel.

There's going to be so many roadblocks and setbacks that are going to come our way.

But if we're grounded and we have the right foundation and we have the right mindset and we have the right circle of influence, we'll be fine.

So today I want to share with you seven things that drive your boy, Adam Marburger, absolutely, pardon my language, batshit crazy.

Today I'm going to talk about seven things that drive me bananas.

And if we focus on these seven things and learn to fix them, we will be successful not just in our business, but we'll be successful in our personal lives.

See, our personal lives are directly correlated to our work life, right?

Like we.

When work life is going really well, it allows our personal life to go a little bit better.

When our personal life is going really well, it also allows our business life.

Now, obviously, they're never going to be in perfect harmony and perfect balance, but if we're working on all aspects and trying to fill all of our buckets and maximize all of our buckets, that's when we thrive.

That's when we experience joy.

That's where the good stuff comes.

So today I'm on one.

So for my listeners, I want to apologize because I'm going to bring some heat to you today.

I'm going to give you some passion.

I'm going to give you some real truth.

I'm going to tell you some things that I know to be fact because I've experienced them.

I'm also going to share some things that I know to be fact because my inner circle and mentors have experienced and taught me lessons that I share with my people so they can grow to the next level.

First thing I want to talk about today, the number, number one on my list of seven today of the things that drive me absolutely bat shit crazy is the woe is me mindset, the victim mindset, the pointing fingers.

The world is not fair.

It's not my fault.

It's always this person, it's this circumstance.

You ever met somebody that's worked at so many jobs and it's never their fault why they get let go or it didn't work out.

I know I have, I've met lots of people like that.

I have a personal, personally, I struggle being around individuals that possess woe is me victim mindset because it just drains my batteries.

I was with a gentleman the other day that has somewhat of a woe as me mindset and I called him out because here's the deal.

If you're going to reach out to me and you're going to want to ask for my time and you're going to want to ask for advice, I'm going to shoot you straight.

My friends, I told this gentleman the other day, I was like, listen, the kind of pointing finger is never your fault.

That is so unattractive.

And until you work on that and until you fix that, you're never going to have fulfillment in life.

Number one, if you're somebody right now that is kind of down in your daubers and you find yourself pointing fingers, become self aware and identify that that's you.

And then work with an accountability partner and just say, hey, listen, I realize I've been a negative Nellie.

I realize that I've been in this habit of pointing fingers, not taking responsibility, woe is me victim mindset.

So I'm asking you as an accountability partner, when you see me doing it, call me out.

It takes some time to get out of this slump.

I was there.

I'll tell you a story.

I was very close to my stepdad.

He was my stepdad for almost 20 years.

It was brutal.

It was very, very hard on the family.

And then fast forward six weeks later, the founder of my largest company and my best friend, Steve, took his own life.

That was the first time someone that close to me had done something like that.

And it affected me.

Still to this day, it's affected me.

Now I deal with it differently.

But it really, really was a challenging time in my Life.

So February, stepdad dies.

April, Steve dies.

And then fast forward to the next month.

My ex wife's grandfather, who was my mentor, who was the most incredible man I've ever known, Albert.

He lost his battle with cancer.

He was the patriarch of the family.

Losing him was probably one of the biggest stings ever.

And then let's Fast forward another 30 days.

Me and my ex wife, wife at the time, going on 13 years of marriage, we filed for divorce.

So now I'm living with my mother in a spare bedroom.

I'm grieving the loss of multiple people, a relationship that was damaged.

My mother was grieving the loss of her soulmate.

And so for about 90 days, I went into a spiral of destruction.

I played victim.

The world is not fair.

Woe is me.

Let's go drink my problems away.

Let's just point fingers at everyone else and let's just count myself out because this world is not fair.

Until I ran into a couple of very high level mentors of mine that punched me right in the face and I had to get out of my own way.

As a matter of fact, I wrote my first book, you're the Effing Problem, A Guide to Getting youg Own Way.

Based on that season of my life.

I was able to look in the mirror and become self aware for the first time with total clarity.

And I decided to get out of my own way and do the things that I needed to do to get to where I am today.

So number one, I'll close the loop.

Victim mindset, woe is me attitude is a non negotiable.

We need to squash it, we need to get rid of it now.

If you have people in your life that possess this run from these people, love on these people, give them the support, give them the honesty.

But if you spend time with victim mindset people, it will spill into your life and you'll find yourself a victim again.

Cut the crap.

Let's get to number two is responsibility.

We as leaders must take responsibility for the good the bad, the ugly.

We must take responsibility for every aspect of our lives.

I see a lot of people.

It's real easy to blame.

And this goes with what I just talked about on the victim mindset.

The woe is me and point and fingers, but not taking responsibility for your stuff, and that's a disease, man.

That's an absolute disease.

We have to own our stuff.

Take responsibility.

When you fail at a project or something doesn't go your way, raise your hand, it's on me.

Let's take this opportunity to tweak, critique, and let's run at it again.

So taking responsibility in all aspects of our lives is absolutely critical.

I see a lot of people out there that I want to lose weight, I want to get in great shape, but they're not taking responsibility in their diet, their nutrition, and getting to the gym.

So therefore, they're not going to get to where they want to go from a physical standpoint, because they're not taking responsibility.

They're not holding themselves accountable.

That's just an example.

As US Leaders, we need to look at every single aspect of our lives, and we have to take responsibility for all of our stuff, not just part of it, but all of it.

Number three, this one here, this one here.

I see a massive lack of.

A massive lack of taking action.

I am a Grant Cardone fan.

I've read his books.

I was a client of his.

Grant Cardone has brainwashed me to not just take action, but to take massive action, because we can go lukewarm or we can go all in.

We can be curious or we can be committed.

I know that in this world, there's no lack of brilliant ideas, but there's a severe lack of taking action on those brilliant ideas.

Do you want to be laying on your deathbed saying, you know what?

I had this brilliant idea.

I knew this could have worked, and you didn't do anything about it.

We can't have that, y'.

All.

That's my biggest fear for you and for me, is to be laying on our deathbed comfortable and at peace, and then have regret.

We don't want that.

So we must take massive action.

Find out what it is that you love and what you're good at, and then take it to the marketplace and take ridiculous massive action.

Take massive action in your relationships.

Take massive action in your health.

Take massive action in your business.

Take massive action in your faith.

If we take massive action on a consistent basis, you will have more.

You will have an abundance and listen.

For those that listen to me talk.

It's not all about the money.

Now making money is kind of fun.

It's sexy.

Assets are sexy.

Sharon Lechter, I was sitting in a.

She's the co author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad.

I got to meet her a few weeks ago and one of her slides on her PowerPoint says, assets are sexy.

And I'm going to tell you, assets are sexy.

But let's talk about this.

Let me break this down for a minute.

The more we have, the more we can give, the more we have, the more impact we can make.

Yeah.

It takes money to make an impact.

I'm sorry, it does.

You can't feed your community if you're broke.

You can't fund a nonprofit and go out and provide for families if you don't have income to do so.

So, yes, the more we make, the more we can bless.

Never forget that.

So I'm going to land the plane on action.

Wherever you are in your life, wherever you are, take insane, radical, massive action.

You might be an employee right now working for somebody else.

Go over and above and take crazy action on all items.

Do things that are not your responsibility because you're going to have people within your organization seeing the action that you're taking.

You're next up for the promotion.

You're next up for the opportunity.

God rewards those that have a faithful heart, that go out, that are proactive, not reactive, that are taking action and going all in.

Remember that the good stuff comes word for it here.

The good stuff comes to those that don't wait.

The good stuff comes to those that get up out of their freaking house and they go out into the world and they take what's rightfully theirs.

Period.

All right, I'm going to move on.

The next thing that drives me bananas, number four is being indecisive.

It's okay to read details.

It's okay to look at facts.

It's okay to pray over things.

It's okay to ponder.

It's okay to take decisions to a board, but we have to quickly make decisions.

I see so often where business owners can't get out of their own way because they're so indecisive.

You ever met somebody that's, you know, kind of done things the same always?

They're afraid of change.

They're afraid of trying something new because they can't make a decision to do so that my friends will never scale and grow your company.

See, I would rather make a decision that's potentially a wrong Decision that we can learn something from than no decision at all drives me crazy.

So as leaders, we need to be decisive.

We need to be quick.

Yes, let's look at the facts, let's look at the data.

Let's make calculated decisions.

However, we need to make a decision.

All right, so think about this.

If you're somewhere in your life and you're struggling right now making a decision, get out of your own way every now and then, you're going to make the wrong decision.

But making the wrong decision is better than no decision at all.

Because if there's no decision at all, you're going to continue to get what you're always getting.

That's insanity.

My friends, if you, if you make a wrong decision in your business, it gives you an opportunity to grow.

It gives you an opportunity to find out what went wrong, why, what could I have done differently?

So then you could go back and make a different decision that will be successful.

So for those that are indecisive, let's take a look in the mirror and let's do something about it.

Number five, this one here might strike a chord with somebody.

This may resonate with somebody as comparing your walk in business and your walk in life with somebody else.

We are human beings.

We are flawed human beings.

We all were hardwired by our creator with special gifts and talents.

We were here on purpose with a purpose, with special gifts and special talents.

It's our job to be able to identify what these gifts and talents are so we can go out into the world and we can help other people.

See in business, we provide solutions to problems and that's how we're rewarded financially.

Think about it.

I don't care what business you're in, you have a solution to a problem.

We solve problems and we create profit by solving problems.

Problems.

But when we start to compare ourselves to everyone else, we get caught up in the man.

I wish I had that.

I wish I was doing that.

I wish I had that person's life garbage, and it's crap.

I challenge you.

I know a lot of people struggle with this because social media is designed to make you distracted and looking at everybody else's life.

Some of the people that you see online that you think have it all together, they don't.

Some of the people that you see online with the nice cars and the houses, those are rented.

Some of the wealthiest people that you may think are the wealthiest people are the brokest wealth whispers.

By the way, it doesn't show off.

And I'm going to tell you Right now, comparing your life to someone else's life isn't fair to you.

It's not fair to your creator.

God designed you for something special.

Let's not let God down.

Let's not let you down.

Let's not let your family down.

Stop comparing you to where you are today in your walk in business, your faith, your personal life.

Don't compare you to other people.

Now let me throw a little sidebar in there.

I will tell you it is a good idea to find a handful of people within your vocation that are doing a little bit more than you.

There's different levels to business, right?

It's okay to identify someone that's doing more than you.

Not to be jealous, but to connect with.

Find a few people that are doing more than you and connect with them and find mentors.

Your circle of influence will be the one to help you get to that next level.

So stop comparing yourself to the greats and start connecting to the greats.

The good stuff comes, my friends.

I found an incredible tribe of mentors.

And those mentors punched me in the gut, made me look in the mirror, made me assess, made me pivot, made me change a whole lot of things in my life.

And now my job is to reciprocate that because I don't want my mentors time in vain.

My job is to help the younger generation evolve as leaders, as business people, as contributors to the community, period.

That's what I'm here to do.

Humans that build is about bringing people that are exceptional from all walks of life onto this show to share their experience, their hardships, their setbacks, their wins to help the younger generation make an impact.

That's what we're here to do, my friends.

So number five again, stop comparing your life to everyone else's.

You have your own.

You're special.

You are special.

You may not believe it.

I'm telling you, you are.

You are special.

You're a gift.

So I challenge you to slow down a little bit, do some assessments of yourself, Identify what you're great at, identify what you love.

Go out into the world and help as many people as you can.

Stop comparing.

It's okay to compete a little bit.

Stop comparing.

Find some mentors doing more than you connect.

That's what you should do.

Number six, this one is a chapter in the book, is all about forgiveness.

And I want to talk about forgiveness for a minute.

Forgiveness is biblical, you know, how do you accept our Lord and Savior to forgive us if we can't forgive others.

So yeah, it's biblical, but it goes much deeper.

There is some selfishness that comes from forgiveness.

When you learn to forgive other people for doing you wrong, it makes your heart feel good, it gives you a sense of peace.

So that's the selfishness, but it's also the right thing to do.

You know, I have a lot of people.

I have, you know, I've got manage at every one of my businesses.

I have a point guard, I have a gm, I have, or I have a partner or I have a lead.

They are my buffer.

Every business has one of these individuals.

One of my businesses, I'm not going to call this individual out, but in one of my businesses, this individual told me last week, she said, adam, you are too nice.

You forgive so quickly.

Like, I just think you're too nice, you just forgive too quick.

And I just said, what's the alternative to not forgive?

To have anger in my heart, to have hostility surrounding me.

That's the other option.

I'll tell you a story.

I invested in a software company.

I was in a situation where, you know, those that know my story, know my story.

You know, I was a self made millionaire at 31 years old, but I also lost it all at 38.

And getting it back was harder and it was funner, but I did well for myself.

I made very strong financial investments my whole life.

I was good at saving money, but I also lost it all.

That's a whole other podcast.

We could go through that later.

But what happened was this, and one of my lowest moments where I didn't have the resources that I once had.

I got pitched an opportunity at a software company and I bought in as a minority partner.

I funded the project.

I had relationships with lending institutions due to my real estate company.

So I was able to get an unsecured line of credit, no collateral attached to this line of credit.

And then I put some cash in the bank.

The individual that was the majority owner that pitched me on the deal, he just went rogue.

He went crazy.

He stole all of our money.

I mean, I was looking at one of the bank statements.

He was going to a gas station in St. Louis at Kwiktrip and going to the ATM and withdrawing 400, 400, 400.

I mean, he's paying bank fees, you know, ATM fees taken out.

He just took all of our cash.

He robbed us.

So our company, we went out of business and then I had to pay the loan off and then I had to pay our debts.

I was out $120,000.

I was out $120,000.

I had another partner, individual, he was out as well.

So I'm telling you this because I was angry.

I was financially devastated.

I was hurt, I was betrayed, I was angry.

Like I just said, it took a few weeks, but I chose to forgive him.

I forgive him.

I give him grace.

I gave him forgiveness.

And a lot of people tell me you're crazy.

Why aren't you taking this guy to court?

Why aren't you going after this guy?

He has nothing.

The guy's got nothing.

I'm not going to get nothing.

So I just forgave the guy and moved on.

One of the best decisions of my life.

Now I'm going to tell you the second piece of forgiveness where I really grew as a person.

I had to go to Sedona, Arizona, shortly after that.

I was going through a whole lot in my life and I wrote a chapter in my book called I Got Lost in the Desert to find Myself.

And that's what I did.

I spent a week in Sedona.

I spent week on multiple days on several vortexes doing a lot of breath work.

I saw some of the most incredible spiritual healers.

I did a whole lot of really gnarly things out in the desert.

We don't have enough time to talk about them right now.

I wasn't taking ayahuasca guys or anything like that, which sounds kind of cool, but not really.

But I met with some really great, influential, high level individuals.

And when I left, I was struggling with forgiving myself.

See, it's one thing to learn how to forgive someone else for just screwing you over.

And it's hard to do, believe it or not at first.

It's easy for me now, but it's hard at first.

But you know what's even harder than forgiving others is forgiving yourself.

See, just like all of us, I've got a story and I've got a past, and I've got a lot of that past that I am just not proud of.

I've got a lot in my past and my kids wouldn't be proud of.

I look at the old me and I'm not proud of some of the old me.

And it took a long time for me to just say, adam, what got me here is not getting me there.

In my past, my past mistakes, my past failures, my past success, my past, everything is a vehicle that got me here today.

But that it doesn't have any bearing on where I'm supposed to go.

So let's just leave the past in the past, Adam.

Forgive yourself for all of the things you did wrong.

And I did that.

I did that.

It was a morning.

August.

It was a morning in August.

I was brushing my teeth.

I looked in the mirror.

I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Sick and tired.

Sick and tired of victim.

I'm sick and tired of running with the wrong crowd.

I'm sick and tired of pointing fingers.

I'm sick and tired of not taking any freaking responsibility for my actions, my previous actions, my current actions.

I got on my knees.

I beg God to forgive me.

And then I looked in the mirror and I forgave myself when I learned how to let go of the past and give true forgiveness to myself for all of the things I was able to heal.

I was able to grow.

I was able to build massive companies.

I was able to make impact in my community higher levels than I ever before.

And so I challenge you to take my story, listen to it, identify with you and your story because your story is special, and make decisions where you need to forgive others, where you need to forgive yourself.

And then I promise you, the good stuff will show up at your front door.

I promise you, maybe not tomorrow, but next week.

Trust me on this one.

The last thing I want to talk about today, number seven, is the thing that drives me crazy, is when I see talented people not taking action or not taking chances to follow your pursuit of your own dream.

Some of us are meant to be employees, and some of us were meant to be employers.

Some of us were meant to be mechanics.

Some of us were meant to be roofers, and some of us were meant to be doctors, and some of us were meant to be business owners.

We all have our own path and our own walk.

But the thing that terrifies me more than anything is sitting on my deathbed with my friends and family around and having an element of regret of a conversation I should have had with somebody about a decision that I should have made about an idea that I didn't see it through.

That scares me.

It doesn't scare me.

It terrifies me.

That's why I am.

You know, a lot of people like Gosh darn Marburger.

Why all these projects?

Why are you doing this?

Because I don't want to leave any stone unturned.

I want to leave it all on the field.

I want to leave it all here.

When I'm gone, I want My legacy to be like Adam left it all on the field.

I didn't wait till my deathbed.

They say, my dear friend who's been on Humans to build.

My dear friend Glenn Lundy, he talks when he speaks.

He's a heck of a speaker when he speaks.

He kind of ends.

A lot of his talks about being on your deathbed.

And that is the moment moments before death.

That's where we have peace.

That's where we have total peace.

And I want that for all of us.

I don't want any of us to have regret before that peace.

I want us to have no regrets.

I want us to take the chance.

I want us to take the risk.

For you young college kids out there, you see a gal sitting in your college class that you want to talk to and you don't want to, you're too concerned or you're afraid of rejection, go talk to her.

If you're afraid to sit down with your boss and ask for an opportunity, shame on you.

Somebody else is going to come and ask for the opportunity, and they're going to get it.

If you have an idea that you feel can make a difference, you have an idea for a problem product, a service, and you just let it die on the vine, no, shame on you.

You got to take that chance.

You got to take that risk.

What is the worst thing that's going to happen?

I'm going to tell you the worst thing that's going to happen.

You're going to fall on your ass.

You're going to fall down.

That's the worst thing that's going to happen.

That's the worst thing that's going to happen.

But guess what?

Every time you have a setback, it's an opportunity to discover what you're made of.

Number one, number two, to dive deep into the situation.

Where did I fall short?

What happened?

What could I have done differently?

It will allow you to reassess the situation and go back again.

Most of the most brilliant human beings on the planet have so many failures.

More failures than wins, by the way.

I've got more failures than I do wins.

It's the relentless tenacity that I have to.

To keep going.

I find the wins eventually.

So for those out there that have an idea and you're scared, yeah, it can be scary sometimes and you are going to fall short.

But it's your ability to get back up and keep going and the perseverance that will allow you to have the things that you deserve.

The good stuff will be rewarded to you.

It Will, it's in the playbook.

It's in the playbook.

I've read the playbook.

I've read the playbook.

I've seen the playbook.

I've been taught the playbook.

I share the playbook.

The playbook is simple.

And my rant is soon to be over.

Y', all, this message is going to come to an end here real soon.

The playbook's real simple.

Believe in yourself.

Have the right mindset.

Treat your body well.

Spend time with others that are doing more than you in the vocation that you want to live in.

Make a decision to take a product or a service to the market, then take massive action on that product and service in the market, you'll win.

If your heart's in the right place, your mind's in the right place, you have a very good product that solves a problem.

If you've got a product that solves a problem, you're going to win.

If you don't play victim mindset, if you don't do the woe is me, if you're not indecisive, if you take massive action, if you stop comparing yourself to others, if you forgive yourself and others and give grace, you're going to win.

You're going to win.

I know you will.

I've seen it.

So I felt compelled to have a little different.

I bring on some great guests.

I've been inspired and motivated by every single guest that I've had on this show.

I've taken something from every show and put it in my life.

I hope you have, too.

And today I just felt my heart tugging on me to give this message to you because this is a similar message that I just gave to a couple of young men that I mentor.

And I feel that this will add some value in your life.

It might kick you in the rear.

Some of the things that I said today might have poked you, and that's okay.

I want to be your friend.

But more than being your friend, I want to see you succeed and I want to see you make an impact.

That's what humans that build is all about.

It's making an impact.

So thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Humans that Build.

My goal with this show is to bring super achievers on a consistent basis to share their stories, to share their setbacks, to share their wins so we can get better together.

That's what this is about.

I appreciate you all very, very much.

Thank you for the support.

I get a lot of messages from you guys.

God bless you all.

It means the world to me.

I'm doing this for us.

Not for me.

I'm doing this for us.

I do this for us.

We're in this together.

We're much better together.

You guys have a productive day.

We'll talk soon.

See you next week.

Humans that build.

Real people, real work.

See you next time.

It.