Why do we only see each other at weddings and funerals? A sentence that has been uttered to me at almost every wedding or funeral I have attended. I’m sure you have heard it too. Maybe you’ve been the one to say it.  

Why does it take tragedy or celebration to get people in the same room and reconnect? How can we stay connected to people in between the weddings and the funerals?

Listen in for 8 tips to stay connected to the people you love (and yet only see at weddings and funerals).

Drink of the week:Eulogy. 

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Why do we only see each other at weddings and funerals?

And a sentence that has been uttered to me at almost every wedding or

a funeral I have ever attended.

I'm sure you've heard it too.

Maybe you've been the one to say it.

Welcome to episode 1 25 of this shit works.

A podcast dedicated to all things, networking, relationship

building and business development.

I'm your host, Julie Brown professional speaker.

Author and networking coach.

And today I'm discussing.

Why we don't have to wait for someone to die or get married to come together.

I unfortunately have had six deaths in my family and friends

circle in the past 18 months.

Not one wedding though.

Maybe I'm getting old.

Maybe by the time you're 46, all of your friends have gotten married.

Remarried.

Or decided not to get married at all.

There has been a number of deaths outside of my family as well.

Celebrity deaths.

People I seemingly grew up with or were part of chunks of my

life through movies and song.

Kirsi, Allie Ray Liotta Christine McVie, Olivia Newton, John

Irene, Cara, Bob Saget, Coolio.

The queen.

And Julie Powell who, if you don't know, was the inspiration behind

the movie, Julie and Julia, which was based off over food blog, where

she attempted to make every recipe.

All 524 of them.

And Julia Childs, the art of French cooking cookbook.

In one year.

She died of cardiac arrest at her home in upstate New York.

She was 49 years old.

49.

Just three years older than me.

We don't know when our lives are going to end.

We don't know if we will have the chance to get together again or to celebrate.

Or to mourn.

Don't waste your life waiting for the next funeral or a wedding to tell someone that

you love them to celebrate with them, to dance and sing and hug and laugh and cry.

Don't wait until someone is hurting to tell them that you are there, that you

love them, that they can count on you.

You see, we rally around people who are going through hard times.

But sometimes the every day is a struggle too.

It's just not as obvious.

You reaching out and checking in on them just might change that day for them.

I changed that they desperately need.

But life gets busy.

I know.

So.

How can we learn to make time for each other in between the

weddings and the funerals?

Before it's our own funeral.

According to thrive global, there are eight tips to make time for

the people that matter most to you.

And.

Maybe even just the people you've lost touch with, but you still love them.

Here they are.

One.

Get out of your own way.

Meaning stop making excuses stop saying it's a work night or it's too far away.

Or the flight prices are too high.

You will always be able to find an excuse.

So stop making excuses and get out of your own way.

To be relentless.

With yourself and with the people you want to connect with all the excuses that

you make, that keep you away from people are the same excuses that others are

facing as they try to reconnect with you.

So be the squeaky wheel.

Keep reaching out and saying, what are we going to get together?

Naked calendar invite and send it to them.

So they don't have an excuse.

Three.

Expand your circle.

I get to know the people that are important to the people.

Who are important to you?

I know.

This sounds counterproductive.

You already know more people than you can keep in touch with.

And I'm telling you, or this article is telling you to expand your circle.

Listen.

The more interconnected you are to the people in your life.

And in your network, the easier it will be to stay connected.

To be able to make plans, to gather, to know what's going

on in each other's lives.

For.

Find a simple activity that brings everyone joy.

It doesn't have to be a big grand event.

It's just the time you spend together.

Each year, a group of us from all over the country, get together to

go to a Notre Dame game together.

It's usually about 10 of us and the planning of this keeps

us all together and connected.

As we pick the date, the game that we're going to go to coordinate

sleeping arrangements, like who's going to be in whose car.

It's so fun.

This one day that we planned together, it keeps us connected

through the entire year.

Or like my friend Haley and I, we have a Christmas tradition

going on 20 years for each year.

We do something together for Christmas.

We see in musical, go on a Christmas light tour, good or reef decorating class.

It doesn't matter.

The only year we missed was COVID and we have years of memories

from this simple tradition.

Or you could just create simple excuses to be together.

Ask someone to go for a walk or a coffee, or like the little girl who lives next

door to me asked me the other day, Julie.

Can we make Christmas cookies together?

Yes, Matilda.

Whenever you want.

I will be here to make Christmas cookies together.

Even in fucking July.

I love that kid.

It doesn't have to be grand.

It just needs to be you guys together.

Five.

Make it purposeful.

And what I got from this tip was to be fully present.

Don't spend time with people distracted by your phone when you were with them.

Be with them.

I can't tell you how many times I've spent time with somebody

in every fucking three seconds.

They're on their phone.

They're looking at their phone and I feel like we're not even together.

I don't do that.

Don't make someone feel that way.

Six.

Have a backup plan.

Yes, life does happen in your plans may fall through, but

make sure they get rescheduled.

Don't let a busted plan be yet another excuse for not getting together.

Work to reschedule it ASAP or when you set the date, have a rain date.

See, okay, this is the day we're going to get together.

If anything happens, meteor, shower, whatever.

I don't know, asteroids, whatever alien vision, like.

Our backup date is our rain date.

Is this date?

At seven.

Share family meals with friends.

What I took from this tip is to invite friends into your regular routine.

Invite people over for dinner or spend holidays together.

My friends are as important to me as my blood related family.

So I include them in family things because to me, they are family.

An eight.

Find what works find a way of keeping in touch that works for you.

Is it phone calls, text messages, emails.

How can you stay in touch?

So that you can plan ways to be together in person.

If you lose touch, you won't make plans plain and simple.

I hope these tips are helpful.

When I mentioned to my friend Lauren, that I was going to be

covering this subject for a podcast.

We somehow went down a wormhole and to funerals.

And what would we want our view?

Funerals to look like.

I for one.

What mind to be a party?

No white lilies for me, please.

I want a playlist in loud colors and what people drinking and

laughing and remembering me.

As the crew.

Crazy person.

I am.

Which makes me think.

Perhaps we should live our lives for our eulogy and not our obituary.

You're a, bituaries what you do.

Your eulogy is who you are.

I want to live my life for who I am.

Okay.

Like any Irish funeral, we're going to have some drinks, so onto the

drink of the week, and you can find.

There is a cocktail named the eulogy.

It's perfect.

Right?

And morbid.

All at the same time.

But before I get to that, I want to let you know that I am once again.

Really saying 10 only 10.

One-to-one 60 minute breakthrough sessions again for January.

These are zoom meetings with me.

One-on-one for 60 minutes, go over.

Anything you're struggling with in regards to your networking business development,

lead generation or your business strategy.

Last year, the you sold out in one week.

There are only 10 spots and I'm only scheduling them

during the month of January.

And when they are gone, they're gone.

So, if you would like to sign up to get on the wait list for one of

these breakthrough sessions, there is a link to that in the show notes.

Okay.

Onto the eulogy cocktail.

Here's what you're going to need.

Two ounces of dry gin, a quarter ounce of extra dry vermouth,

one and a half ounces of absent, which might put you in your grave.

Um, what you're going to do is you're going to start all of these

ingredients with ice and then strain into a chilled coupe glass.

All right, friends.

That's all for this week.

If you like what you heard today, please leave a review

and subscribe to the podcast.

Also remember to share this podcast to help it reach a larger audience.

If you want more.

Julie Brown.

You can buy my book.

This shit works on Amazon and Barnes and noble.

You can find me on LinkedIn at Julie Brown BD.

Just let me know where you found me when you reach out.

I am Julie Brown underscore BD on the Instagram, or you can

just pop on over to the website.

Julie Brown, bd.com.

Thanks so much for being here.

Until next week.