Today I suggest an alternative to New Year's resolutions: a
word of the year. Join me as I outline my process for choosing a word for
the year and how it has helped me set and achieve goals. Discover how setting a
word for the year can help you avoid the pitfalls of New Year's resolutions and
instead focus on growth and self-improvement. I also share my own word for the
year, "connect," and how it has helped me re-build friendships and
expand my networking efforts.
Download the WORD of the year worksheet here: https://1drv.ms/w/s!Ao5cYCkwsgDIgZofqcbRw4b4fjvjkw?e=OH7x5j
Download the Vitality Assessment from https://heyboomer.biz
Subscribe on Apple Podcast, Stitcher , Google Podcast. or Spotify
Follow us on Facebook, LinkedIn and Instagram
You can email me with questions or comments at wendy@heyboomer.biz
–
Wendy Green is a Certified Life Coach, working with people going
through the sometimes uncomfortable life transition from full-time work to
“what’s next.”
Find out more about Wendy’s 6-week “What’s Next Transition” Coaching workshop
–
Support our sponsor: roadscholar.org/heyboomer
Produced by the the Greenville Podcast Company
Speaker1:
:Hello. Welcome to Hey, Boomer.
Speaker1:
:Live from New Jersey, my name is Wendy Green and I am your host for Hey, Boomer.
Speaker1:
:And hey, Boomer is for those of us who believe that we are never too old to set a
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:new goal or dream A new dream.
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:I'm on a mission with a boomer to support and inspire older adults to find new
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:beginnings, to confront endings and transitions, and to evolve into who they want
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:to be and to who we want to be.
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:And why am I in New Jersey?
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:I am here for the wedding of the daughter of a very good friend of mine and a very good
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:friend of mine. David drove up with me.
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:And so I am getting to connect in all kinds of ways, which is perfect for me because my
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:word for the year is connection.
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:And some people have asked me how I came up with my word for the year.
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:And so I thought today, since I am here in New Jersey without a guest, this would be a
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:good time to go through the process that I use for word for the year.
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:I did share a link to the worksheet that I use in the comment section on both Facebook
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:and LinkedIn.
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:So if you were able to download that, you can walk along with me.
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:If not, you can always drop me an email.
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:You can send it to Wendy at Hey Boomer Dot Biz and I will send that to you after the
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:show. Or you can look in the show notes which will be part of the podcast and I will
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:have the link to the document there.
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:Before I get started, I wanted to thank our sponsor, Road Scholar.
Speaker1:
:Road Scholar is the leader in educational travel for Boomers and Beyond and offering
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:expert led adventures to all 50 states and over 100 countries.
Speaker1:
:Traveling with Rhodes Scholars.
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:One of my favorite ways to travel.
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:You always learn something.
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:You meet new people. It's really a wonderful experience.
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:And I'm hosting a trip to Costa Rica June 2nd through the 10th, and there's a few spots
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:left. So if you think you might want to join us and I'm telling you, it's going to be an
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:amazing adventure, I hope that you will drop me an email.
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:Again, it's Wendy at Hey Boomer Bizz, and I will send you all the information about what
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:we will be doing in Costa Rica.
Speaker1:
:So who wants to develop a word for the year?
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:I used to set New Year's resolutions until I realized that I suspect, like many of you,
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:setting a New Year's resolution was setting myself up for failure.
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:Because once I didn't lead up to my resolution, then I was like, Oh, shoot, you
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:know, I'm no good at this.
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:I failed. And then you abandon that resolution.
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:So think about it.
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:Like, how many times did you over the years say, okay, this year I'm going to get in
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:shape and you join the gym and you start working out and you get going and then, Oh,
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:wow, that really hurt or huh.
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:I just don't feel like going today.
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:And before you know it, you're not going or you're very intermittently going.
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:And boom failure.
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:Or you say, this year I'm going to lose £10.
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:And you start you get that diet going.
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:You maybe buy special foods, whatever it is that you do, and maybe you start to lose a
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:few pounds and then something comes up, right?
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:There's this wedding to you, or it's your birthday, or you just got to have that piece
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:of chocolate cake and then you're beating yourself up again.
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:So when you start to fail on your New Year's resolutions, what happens?
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:You start beating yourself up and that's no good.
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:We don't want to be telling ourselves that we're lazy or we can't do it or we're not
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:good enough. That's not the message we want to give ourself, but with a resolution.
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:I have found we set ourselves up to fail with a word for the year.
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:There is no failure because it's for the whole year.
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:So if you mess up once you have the rest of the year to keep getting better.
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:And the cool thing about it is the awareness of the word really helps us learn about
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:ourselves, learn about how we can grow and we get better at it rather than giving up on
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:it and feeling like we failed.
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:So with that, I wanted to go through the process that I use to create a word for the
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:year and hope that it will be helpful to you.
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:So let me start with a couple of examples.
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:Last year, my word was acceptance.
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:I chose that word because I found that I could be and I'm sorry to admit this, but I
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:could be judgmental of people that were very close to me when I saw them doing something I
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:didn't think was good for them or was right for them, or they expressed an opinion that I
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:thought was a wrong opinion.
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:And many times I was very vocal about my disappointment or my not agreeing with them.
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:So I chose the word acceptance so that I would get better at that.
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:And I made a visual, a real pretty little graphic.
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:Pretty is in the eyes of the beholder, right?
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:So a pretty little graphic that I put up on my bulletin board so that I would see it as a
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:reminder on a regular basis.
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:Was I perfect at it?
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:Oh, hell no.
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:But did I get better at it?
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:You bet I did.
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:I found that.
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:By keeping that word in my awareness.
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:Many times I was able to and just take a breath and think about is it better to be
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:kind than to be right?
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:And I would take that breath and I would be more accepting, less judgmental.
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:There were times when I just couldn't do it and I would lash out.
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:And then I realized, okay, so that's a learning opportunity.
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:What was it that triggered me and then get back to getting better at it.
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:So this year I have chosen the word connect.
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:And I have to say, I am so grateful to connect every week with you, my listeners.
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:And I'm grateful that last week we had our first Hey Boomer banter and I was able to
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:come out from behind the microphone and connect with many of you that way.
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:And that was so much fun.
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:We have a new banter coming up on February the 21st, and if you want more information
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:about that, again, drop me an email.
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:Wendi at Hey, Boomer DAVIES and I will share that information with you.
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:I also love it when I see your comments saying hello or commenting on something I
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:said, giving me encouragement.
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:You know, it's it's interesting when you're the one behind the microphone and you can't
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:see anybody you're talking to.
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:It's so nice to see the comments or on my blog when I write something.
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:So connection is important to me.
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:It's also connecting with in real life, right?
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:So I chose the word connection because I had gotten way too comfortable during the
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:pandemic with being by myself, staying in my house, and I knew I needed to build back
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:those friendships that I had been neglecting and also to build my networking practice and
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:get out there and speak more so that more people know about the work that we're doing
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:with Hey Boomer. So Connection is my North Star this year, and maybe some of you already
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:know what your North Star word is for this year.
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:But there are also people who have no idea what word to pick, how to pick a word, why
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:they should pick a word.
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:So before we start, I want to tell you there are no right or wrong words.
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:The word you choose is the right word for you.
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:You will choose a word that that stretches your comfort zone, or you will choose a word
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:that makes you feel more peaceful.
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:Or you will choose a word that gives you the impetus to learn a new skill.
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:Every word you choose will be the right word for you.
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:So what did I do with to start with?
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:Well, on the worksheet, I share 65 possible words.
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:Now, interestingly, the word that I chose connection is not on this list.
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:But sometimes when you look at the list, you will see exactly the right word for you or it
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:may inspire you to include a word that is not here.
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:But, you know, it made you think about it.
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:So the list includes words that are all over the board.
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:They may be compassion.
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:You may want more laughter in your life.
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:Or maybe you realize you need to do more forgiveness in your life.
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:Maybe you need more discipline.
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:Or now you're ready to take a new risk.
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:Try something new.
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:Maybe you want to explore art.
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:Or maybe integrity is the word for you.
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:So what I would suggest is take a minute.
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:Now, think about it.
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:If you don't have your word, what is it that's going to be important for you this
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:year to really help you reach ever stated as you want to reach?
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:Like I said, it may be expanding your horizons, but it may be finding more inner
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:peace. So it's the right one for you sometimes.
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:There's a whole lot of words on this list that are going to be perfect for you.
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:So what I would suggest is pick no more than three and then we'll narrow it down from
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:there. Okay, So maybe you have your three now, and the next step in the process is your
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:why? Why do you think the words you wrote down would be good for you?
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:And I love seeing some of you sharing your words.
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:Pike says. Clarity.
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:Philip says, Serve gin says gratitude.
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:Add great, great words, all of them.
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:So now we got to find the why.
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:So some of you have heard of Simon Sinek.
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:He is an author, a business consultant, and he came up with the phrase Find your Why.
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:And so in personal development and business, finding your why is really about.
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:Finding. What is your purpose?
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:Why it matters and why it matters is important.
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:Josephine's action.
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:Doris says Joy, love it.
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:So finding your why motivates you to have more clarity.
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:So my why for connection?
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:Well, I think as I mentioned during the pandemic, I became too comfortable being at
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:home. So I knew I needed to expand my connections in a business sense for the
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:podcast and for my coaching.
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:But I also wanted to reconnect with friends that I hadn't seen in a while.
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:I wanted to get better at what I was doing, so I wanted to connect with other podcasters
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:and other coaches and finding your why is really going to be important.
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:So look at the words that you've chosen if you have more than one and describe why, why
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:that's important.
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:David has to hear discipline and peace.
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:So it would be a good opportunity to think about why each one of those is important, and
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:you'll might find that describing your wife or one.
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:Just comes naturally describing a why for the other.
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:Maybe that's a little harder.
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:So maybe that's not the exactly right word for you this year.
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:So once you have your why now we want to get to how is this going to make your life
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:different if you live this word every day?
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:How is this going to make your life different?
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:And so this is where we really get to expand our imagination a little bit.
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:And when when I'm coaching people, you know, and I say, well, what difference is that
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:going to make for you? How is that going to make things better or worse?
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:Or what's going to happen when you choose those words or choose that action?
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:A lot of people, the chants start to come in, right?
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:Well, you know, but if I do that well, but this is going to happen or I can't do that
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:because of this.
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:And so I say when you're writing this vision for what a day would be like if you lived
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:this word. Take off those negative inputs that you're hearing in your mind and say,
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:What if I could do this exactly the way I want to really be visionary in your
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:description of this?
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:So in an average day, if I was to live the word connection every day, what it would do
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:for me is it would bring me away from my computer where I am easily spending too much
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:time because I love what I'm learning.
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:But it would bring me away from my computer and I would get this thought, You know what?
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:I haven't seen Karen in a while.
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:I think I'll call her.
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:On a normal day, I might be like, Yeah, but I have too much and this is my vision.
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:I'm going to call Karen and see if she wants to meet me later and we'll just go out and
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:hear some music or we'll go out and have a drink or you know what?
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:It is a beautiful day outside.
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:I'm going to go for a walk.
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:I'll listen to the birds.
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:I'm going to see the beauty in the sky and it's going to it's going to integrate the
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:connection I want with nature into my life.
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:So once I have this vision of what this perfect average day would look like, it's
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:much more balanced than what I have been living.
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:And it again motivates me to want to live with more connection in my life.
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:So think about your words.
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:Serve clarity, Joy.
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:How will your life be on an average day if you live that word that day?
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:So now next step is to come up with ten things that you would attract into your life
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:if you lived that word.
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:I know ten things is a lot, right?
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:And I'm guessing you won't find all ten right now while we're on this show together,
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:but you might be able to come up with two or three.
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:And then as the day goes on or a couple of days go on, you might think about it and come
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:up with more. So for me, if I start listing some of the things that will be different for
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:me or better for me, that when I live this word, stronger friendships, that will
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:definitely see a bump if I'm spending more time with friends.
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:Right? Possible speaking opportunities.
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:Whew, that's pushing my comfort zone.
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:But I'm going to get out there and do more speaking.
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:Why? Because it's important to me to get the word out about, Hey, Boomer, so that more
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:people are going to live these fully present, active, engaged lives.
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:I'm going to be learning more things because I'll be working with other podcasters or
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:other coaches, I'll be working with other speakers, I'll be working with organizations
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:and I'll be learning from them.
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:So there are so many ways that.
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:Keeping connection as my North Star word for this year are going to improve my life and
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:the work that I'm doing.
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:Did you get a few?
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:Did you write a few down?
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:Okay, so here we go.
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:Now that you know why you have a vision and you have a list of some of the possible
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:positive outcomes that you can get by living this word.
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:What's going to get in your way.
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:These are the triggers.
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:What is going to get in your way of living that word?
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:In my case, these triggers are the internal blocks, right?
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:It's my inner voice saying to me, Well, I'm too tired.
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:I don't really feel like going out tonight.
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:Or I tell myself, my week is already so booked.
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:How am I going to possibly fit in a coffee date or a lunch date?
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:I've got so much to do.
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:Or I might tell myself, especially this time of year, it's too cold and too dark to go out
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:tonight. I think I'll just stay home.
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:But once I know what these internal blocks are, I can choose to reframe them to stop
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:those internal blocks.
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:And this is where we start to develop new habits.
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:Right? So if I start to tell myself I'm too busy, I don't have time for this.
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:I don't have time to go meet a girlfriend for lunch or I don't have time to go to a
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:networking event. I'm too busy.
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:It's now my choice to change that message, to say yes, but think about all the nice
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:people you're going to meet and what a great opportunity to get out that you did choose
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:connection as your word, right, Wendy So how exciting that now you have an opportunity to
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:go out and connect.
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:It's a habit change, right?
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:So the process is to think about how you're going to change it.
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:Now. Oh, one other habit that I did add to my my way of changing these negative words
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:that I'm telling myself why I can't do it is that I have chosen an accountability partner.
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:And every week she checks in with me to see how I'm doing.
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:And just knowing that I have an accountability partner is so powerful because
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:I can say to her, You know what I did this week for connections?
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:Oh yeah.
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:And she goes, Good job.
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:Or, Well, who did you think about this?
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:Maybe you could have done that instead of declining the opportunity.
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:So it really she asked me questions to motivate me.
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:I ask her questions because I'm her accountability partner also.
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:So very good to have somebody tell somebody what your word is and get somebody to just
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:check in with you once a week short, very short conversation.
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:How did you do? Or maybe by email and then reinforce that?
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:Okay, so you've got the habits.
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:So the final part of the worksheet has to do with your vision for 2023 and how your word
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:enhances that vision.
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:So with my word, connect my vision.
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:And this is a little different than your what your average day going to be like.
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:This is like the full vision.
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:So my vision is with more connection in my life, I will be able to spend more time with
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:my family, my children, my grandchildren, my sister, my brother, my mother.
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:So connection, more connection with friends.
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:I'm excited about some of the things that I've already got lined up and can't wait to
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:see how this year plays out.
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:More connection with nature.
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:I get revived when I'm out in nature, and so even when the weather is not perfect, to be
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:able to just get outside, even it's just going on my back patio and watching the the
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:leaves start to bud just a little bit or listening to the birds.
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:It's worth it.
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:Nature is so good for me.
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:And of course, Costa Rica.
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:Oh my goodness.
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:Connection with podcasters, connection with audiences like you, my listeners, like
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:audiences that I will be speaking to.
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:I have a couple of opportunities coming up that I'm pretty excited about.
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:And as I said at the beginning, I would recommend that you make a visual.
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:I have a.
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:A thing on my bulletin board again this year for the word connect.
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:And it's very colorful and it has all those different pockets of how I want to connect
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:with friends, with family, with nature, with other podcasters, with different audiences.
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:And that is my North Star.
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:So when I start to get into my internal blocks of going, Yeah, but I'm comfortable.
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:I don't want to go out, I can look at that and go, okay, Wendy, you know, you chose this
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:word because it was good for you and you want this.
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:You know what your Y is.
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:So go do it.
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:And will I be perfect every day?
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:No. But will I be getting better every day?
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:You bet.
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:So what are my takeaways for choosing a word of the year as opposed to a New Year's
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:resolution? Well, you can't fail when you choose a word of the year.
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:Clarity serve.
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:Gratitude, joy, action, discipline.
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:All of those words will stay with you for this year as you go forward.
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:And you can't fail even if you're not living that word every day.
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:You are aware of it and it keeps you moving on the path to living the word that's going
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:to be impactful for you this year.
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:And know your wide once you know your wife or those words that will also keep you moving
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:and then have your vision.
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:What will your life be like when you're living that word?
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:Finally, get creative.
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:Go ahead, make a picture.
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:You can use your own artistic skills.
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:You can use graphics you find online or in magazines, but make a picture that's going to
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:inspire you and keep it where you'll see it every day so that you will know what word is
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:going to make your life that much better for 2023.
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:So I hope this has been helpful to you.
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:It certainly has been fun for me to share this with you.
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:Again, if you need to get the worksheet, you can email me at Wendy at Haberman Biz.
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:You can also sign up for our monthly banter.
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:It's $12 a month or $100 for the year, so that's the savings.
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:And every month we will meet and talk about all kinds of interesting, fun things.
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:And you get to meet new people, connect and again, send me an email at Wendy at Hey Biz,
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:and I will let you know how you can go ahead and get that information.
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:Also, please support our sponsor.
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:Road scholar r0ad scholar dot org slash.
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:Hey Boomer. And please use the Hey Boomer and go look at all the trips so that they
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:know that we are supporting them as they are supporting us.
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:I also wanted to mention the vitality assessment that I have on the Hey Boomer Dot
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:Biz home page.
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:So what the vitality assessment will give you is an insight into how energized you are
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:by the life you're living now.
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:So it will ask you a bunch of questions and then you'll get a score and you'll find out
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:is your energy sustainable?
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:Is it on the upswing?
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:Is it on the downswing?
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:Is it time to add some things or take some things away so that you feel more fully
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:energized? Or are you feeling somewhat empty?
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:Just enough energy to make it through the week.
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:Or maybe not even that.
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:And that's where putting in the effort to regain your vitality and to really feel fully
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:energized is worth the effort.
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:And that's where coaching can help you.
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:So check out the vitality assessment on the Hey Boomer Dot Biz Home page.
Speaker1:
:And let me tell you about my guests for next week.
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:Super excited.
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:Her name is Ellie Katz.
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:And when I first spoke to Ellie, I really liked her right away.
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:She is so compassionate and committed to the work that she is doing.
Speaker1:
:Ellie Katz is the founder of an organization called Sages and Seekers.
Speaker1:
:Sages are the older adults.
Speaker1:
:The seekers are the younger high school kids, and their intergenerational program are
Speaker1:
:designed to develop empathy and diminish social isolation and ageism while meeting the
Speaker1:
:universal and compelling need of both young adults and elders to find meaning and purpose
Speaker1:
:in their lives.
Speaker1:
:You're going to love Ellie.
Speaker1:
:You're going to love this program.
Speaker1:
:I'm really excited to bring it to you.
Speaker1:
:And as always, I like to remind you to live with passion, live with relevance, and live
Speaker1:
:with courage.
Speaker1:
:And remember that you are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.
Speaker1:
:My name is Wendy Green, and this is Ben.