Things To Remember – ‘Love Each Other and Everybody Else
It is our mission to love people—to love people so well that in, and through, and because of God’s love being exercised through us, the people we love will be drawn into a lifelong friendship with God, and they too will start loving people. Religious organizations like denominations will codify, policy-make, and set rules to follow. Honor those that promote true loving of people, and tolerate those that don’t block loving. However, because God has called you to love, seek to overthrow those that block us from God’s call on our lives to love people.
This week’s #WholeLifeTakeAways:
- How easy or hard is it for you to love the people who you’d identify as “your people”?
- Who is the hardest person for you to think about loving?
- How hard will it be for you to remember to love each other and everybody else?
- What do you think about each of the descriptors of love from 1 Corinthians 13?
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
- What do you think about the definition of love being “readiness to serve”?
- How can you take advantage of practicing loving people different from you who are part of WholeLife Church?
- On the back of this sheet are 13 principles to guide how we treat each other. How can you make these parts of your practice?
- How will you work on loving with no barriers?
Which of these take-aways resonated with you this week? We would love to hear you feedback and you can reach us at any of the methods below:
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AS MENTIONED IN THIS WEEK’S MESSAGE….
PRINCIPLES FOR HOW WE TREAT EACH OTHER
Our Practice of Respect and Community Building
1. Create a hospitable and accountable community. We all arrive in isolation and need the generosity of friendly welcomes. Bring all of yourself to the work in this community. Welcome others to this place and this work and presume that you are welcomed as well. Hospitality is the essence of restoring community.
2. Listen deeply. Listen intently to what is said, listen to the feelings beneath the words. Strive to achieve a balance between listening and reflecting, speaking and acting.
3. Create an advice-free zone. Replace advice with curiosity as we work together for peace and justice. Each of us is here to discover our own truths. We are not here to set someone else straight, to “fix” what we perceive as broken in another member of the group.
4. Practice asking honest and open questions. A great question is ambiguous, personal and provokes anxiety.
5. Give space for unpopular answers. Answer questions honestly even if the answer seems unpopular. Be present to listen not debate, correct or interpret.
6. Respect silence. Silence is a rare gift in our busy world. After someone has spoken, take time to reflect without immediately filling the space with words. This applies to the speaker, as well – be comfortable leaving your words to resound in the silence, without refining or elaborating on what you have said.
7. Suspend judgment. Set aside your judgments. By creating a space between judgments and reactions, we can listen to the other, and to ourselves, more fully.
8. Identify assumptions. Our assumptions are usually invisible to us, yet they undergird our worldview. By identifying our assumptions, we can then set them aside and open our viewpoints to greater possibilities.
9. Speak your truth. You are invited to say what is in your heart, trusting that your voice will be heard, and your contribution respected. Own your truth by remembering to speak only for yourself. Using the first person “I” rather than “you” or “everyone” clearly communicates the personal nature of your expression.
10. When things get difficult, turn to wonder. If you find yourself disagreeing with another, becoming judgmental, or shutting down in defense, try turning to wonder: “I wonder what brought her to this place?” “I wonder what my reaction teaches me?” “I wonder what he’s feeling right now?”
11. Practice slowing down. Simply the speed of modern life can cause violent damage to the soul. By intentionally practicing slowing down we strengthen our ability to extend nonviolence to others—and to ourselves.
12. All voices have value. Hold these moments when a person speaks as precious because these are the moments when a person is willing to stand for something, trust the group and offer something they see as valuable.
13. Maintain confidentiality. Create a safe space by respecting the confidential nature and content of discussions held in the group. Allow what is said in the group to remain there.
Prepared by Valencia College’s Peace and Justice Institute with considerable help from the works of Peter Block, Parker Palmer, the Dialogue Group and the Center for Renewal and Wholeness in Higher Education
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NEXT WEEK: WEEK 4 OF ANDY’S FINAL SERIES AT WLC: ‘Things To Remember’ – There’s A Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow.
The theme music for Speaking of Grace was written, produced, and performed by WholeLife Church’s own Phillip Burks - https://www.phillipburks.com/.
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