He went quiet for two months.

She thought she'd blown the ask.

She hadn't.

The donor had watched his business take a hit, watched the news every night, and frozen. He wasn't saying no to her $250,000 proposal. He was saying he didn't know how to say yes to anything right now.

Here's what she finally did.

She sent a note that had nothing to do with the gift. She just asked how he was thinking about the year ahead.

He called at 8:15 the next morning and talked for forty minutes. About his company. His kids. How unsure everything felt.

She didn't re-pitch. She asked one question near the end: what would make a commitment feel manageable for you right now?

Five years instead of three, he said. And a conversation each January.

He signed for $300,000.

The gift got bigger because the risk got smaller.

In this week's episode of The Intentional Fundraiser, I'm walking you through the emotional layer of giving in 2026, the four conversational moves I use with anxious donors, and five gift structures that help people feel safe saying yes to something big.

Here's my question for you. When a donor hesitates, is your first instinct to shrink the number or to shrink the risk?

Listen to the episode, then share it with someone on your team who has an anxious donor conversation coming up this week.

More from Tammy Zonker

Author of Calling All Heroes: Combining the Best of Donor-Centered and Community-Centered Fundraising for Greater Impact

Founder of Fundraising Transformed

President of Modern Institute for Charitable Giving

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