In this episode, I welcome Ges Ray, an inspiring public speaking trainer, who shares a practical technique to improve your work presentations, sales conversations, and pitches—deep breathing. Ges passionately walks us through the importance of breathing in alleviating stress, boosting confidence, and enhancing audience perception. Discover how to transform from chaos to calm with simple breathing exercises that can be practiced anywhere, even moments before you speak. Ges also touches on the broader implications of controlled breathing, including its impact on voice depth and resonance. Join us to learn a valuable skill to bring joy to your professional life.

01:01 The Dread of Public Speaking

02:35 Understanding the Importance of Breathing

05:35 Practical Deep Breathing Exercise

08:36 Applying Deep Breathing in Real Situations

Speaker Links:

Connect with Ges Ray on Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gesray/

Ges Ray - Learn more about his speak performance training : 

https://speakperformance.online/

Links:

If you enjoyed this, you might also enjoy my Life Satisfaction Assessment. It's a 30-minute program where I guide you through a deep dive into 10 areas of your life to assess what's bringing you joy and what's bringing you down. I call it Derailed and it's a fabulous place to begin a joy-at-work redesign.

https://www.midlifeunstuck.com/derailed

Eight years ago, I interviewed our next guest, Ges Ray,

when, in truth, I wasn't quite sure that Joy at Work was possible for me.

His story inspired me.

Why?

Even though he was edging closer to retirement age.

He was just ramping up the newest phase of his career as a public speaking trainer.

He's no ordinary public speaking trainer.

You just have to pick up a copy of his tiny, super engaging book to know that.

Today, I've asked him to share with you One very practical, often forgotten

technique that you can do to make your next work presentation, your

next sales conversation, or your next pitch of a new idea to your team feel

much easier and land much better.

Let's dive

It's two minutes to go.

Two minutes before you have to speak.

Not just speak, but speak in public.

You dread these moments.

You detest these moments.

Time and time again, and it always seems to be time.

It's the report to the board, the report to clients, the team

meetings, the sales figures.

And every time it's the same.

The knotted stomach, the heart palpitations, the

breathing rough and ragged.

The wish that at that moment you were somewhere entirely different, and time

and time again it's the same process.

You get through it, you breathe a sigh of relief, and then it's the build up

again to the next time, the next meeting.

Again, it's the concern, it's the worry, it's the knotted stomach,

it's the heart palpitations, it's the breathing rapid and ragged.

Knowing that the process is going to happen yet again.

Are you gonna do something about it?

Probably not at this precise moment.

It's been on the agenda to perhaps take a workshop or a course or experience.

But at the moment, there are too many things on your plate.

If only there was one thing that would help, one tip, one trick, one

technique, that right now would do something to build your confidence.

and build your audience's confidence in you.

I'm Ges, Ges Ray, and if you'll permit me to walk alongside you for

just a few moments, we will work on one thing, one tip, one trick,

one technique, your breathing.

that will ease your stress, build your confidence, and perhaps just as important,

build your audience's confidence in you.

Let's put some context around it first.

Breathing is pretty fundamental to your survival.

Along with water and food, it's, uh, it's up there in the top three.

When you're under pressure, part of your survival evolution is to breathe rapidly.

It's the amygdala responding, it's the fight and flight mechanism kicking in.

When danger strikes, getting a good breath in will give you part of

the ability to escape, to run away.

Which is probably what you want to do at this precise moment.

And that, uh, rapid top of the chest breathing, the I've just ran

up the top of the stairs breathing, is one of the results of that

feeling of I'm under pressure.

Interestingly, film scriptwriters, when they want you on the edge of your

seat, really in suspense, one of their techniques is to put the character under

some difficulty with their breathing, and you're starting to empathize with

them, to breathe rapidly with them, to be feeling what they're feeling.

Which, also interestingly, is probably what your audience is feeling when

you're displaying those symptoms to them.

So what can we do about it?

Let's work on one straightforward, simple, deep breathing exercise.

to help flip you from chaos to calm.

Now, if mindfulness or yoga or some other exercise that involves deep breathing

is part of your day to day routine, Or indeed, if you're a mad choral singer

like me, then breathing exercises will be a transferable skill that you

can bring into your public speaking.

The chances are that if one of those disciplines is part of your daily life,

you'll be aware of the vagus nerve sitting there monitoring, watching, listening,

sending signals back to your brain.

If it's picking up signals of top of the chest breathing, rapid breathing, the

sort of breathing that's responding to fight and flight mechanism, It's sending

back that message, under pressure, must escape, must do something about it,

whereas if it's picking up calm and relaxed, that's how you are going to feel.

So let's do a practical exercise now that can encourage deep diaphragmatical

breathing, that can help you relax, that can build your confidence and

build that audience's confidence in you.

Now, if you are able to May I invite you to join me in standing up to

undertake this simple exercise.

No worries if you can't at the moment.

If you're listening to this whilst sitting quietly at the desk with

others watching you, we can still do it while you're sitting down.

First of all, just take a few rapid top of the chest breaths, as if you'd

just run up the top of the stairs.

Just to, just to feel how it is when we get that sensation,

when we're under pressure.

That's it, just a few breaths, just to, just to get that feeling

there, so you know what it's like.

And,

and now take one hand, whichever you prefer, and place it roughly

below where a belt buckle would be if you were wearing jeans.

And now, what we're going to do, and I'll demo first and then

invite you to join in with me.

It's just take a deep diaphragmatical breath.

Letting the breath go as low down as we possibly can as we breathe in.

Down to where that hand is at the moment.

And as we take that breath in, force your hand out, push your

hand out with your breath, feeling your breath as deep as possible.

All this whilst keeping your shoulders relaxed.

The temptation is that as we take that deep breath, we, we rise our shoulders

up as well, but we want to keep those nice and calm and relaxed, and take

that breath in as deep as we can, down to our diaphragm, Down to where your

hand is, and pushing that hand away.

So with me, after three, breathing in, one, two, three, breathe in,

and breathe out again.

And again, one, two, three, breathe in,

and breathe out again.

And one more for luck, one, two, three, breathe in,

And breathe out again.

Now, how are you feeling compared with three breaths ago?

We're not here making dramatic changes in a couple of minutes, but taking

little steps, marginal gains, towards making us calm, confident speakers.

Getting the breathing right.

And taking deep breaths before you start is a simple exercise that

can take place while you're in the chair before you have to make that

walk up to the front of the room.

Or if you're in the office or in the home office on a virtual call about

to join in a Teams or a Zoom meeting.

Again, as you know that the moment is coming up for you to speak, and

as you sense the pressure mounting on your shoulders, relax them.

And instead, take a couple of deep breaths to settle you and to put you in

a calm, comfortable, confident position.

Before you begin to speak, the effects are a double whammy.

For you, it's giving you a moment of calm.

It's building your confidence.

It actually slows your pace a fraction as well.

Helps give your voice more depth and more resonance.

And for your audience, instead of them feeling for you, and actually waiting

for you to finish, so that they can relax on your behalf, you're helping

to engender Your audience with a sense of confidence in you as a speaker.

It means they can be fully focused on you, and far better placed to

take on board what you are saying.

And there's a bonus feature here as well.

The more you become aware of the impact of breathing on your speaking

abilities, the more you'll be aware of how others are using this technique to

influence and even control the room.

So that's the one thing in this 10 minute micro speak performance workshop.

Get the breathing right before you even speak.

Get the breathing right, use deep breathing techniques

to build your confidence.

And just as importantly, your audience's confidence in you.

I am Jez, Jez Ray, and it's been my privilege to walk alongside you today.

If you enjoyed this, you might also enjoy my

Life Satisfaction Assessment.

It's a 30 minute program where I guide you through a deep dive into 10 areas

of your life to assess what's bringing you joy and what's bringing you time.

I call it D.

It's a fabulous place to begin a joy at work redesign.