In Episode #230 of The Happiness Challenge, join Klaudia to discover how to make overthinking more constructive; using three research-backed insights that help you shift from mental spirals to clearer, calmer thinking.
Whether you tend to get stuck in “why is this happening?” loops, find yourself brooding over the past, or worry as a way to avoid uncomfortable feelings, this episode will help you understand what your mind is trying to do and how to guide it in a more helpful direction.
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Welcome back happiness seekers. I'm Claudia. I'm a work psychologist and certified Chief Happiness officer and I explore the science backed habits for a happier life.
If you've been following along this month, you will know we've been exploring the topic of overthinking from a much more compassionate and practical angle.
We started the month with interview with Dr. Claire Heiss in episode 228 where we talked about why trying to jump straight to think positive often backfires when we are overthinking thinking and instead we focus on choosing what's helpful, not what's positive. Then in the Follow up, episode 229, we covered some practical ways to slow down the mind in the moment.
That included Claire's ABC coping statement and I shared some of my favorite few quick practical tools you can use when you feel yourself spiraling. And today I want to dive a little bit deeper because here is the twist.
Overthinking is not showing up to ruin our life, it's actually showing up to help us.
So in this episode I want to explore the hidden benefits of overthinking and also share three research backed insights that we can use to make overthinking more constructive. Because when we are overthinking we have actually two options.
We can slow down the mind to give ourselves a little bit of respite and perspective, or we can think how can can I actually make the overthinking work for me rather than against me? So let's dive into that. So overthinking absolutely has a job and it is a protection strategy.
Our brain is overthinking because ultimately is trying to prevent mistakes, reduce uncertainty, avoid regret, anticipate any, anticipate any danger. And that's quite reassuring to know that overthinking has a purpose and it is actually quite positive purpose.
But of course it doesn't feel like that, right?
I am not feeling grateful for my overthinking when I'm lying wide awake at 4am in the morning worrying about the future, going through all the what if scenarios, really don't appreciate the value of that activity at that point in time.
So let's look into some insights from research that can help us to understand overthinking better, but ultimately can help us to make overthinking more constructive. So the first insight is about the fact that overthinking is ultimately a repetitive pattern.
It's combined of repetitive thoughts that we often repeat on kind of on the loop. And one helpful idea in the research is that repetitive thinking comes in different modes.
So Psychologist Edward Watkins reviewed evidence showing that repetitive thought can be constructive or unconstructive, depending whether it's abstract. So the more abstract our thinking, the more unconstructive it is because we going into why am I like this? Why is this happening?
Or is it concrete and process focused? Then it becomes more constructive, such as, okay, so what exactly happened and what's the next step?
So it's not necessarily how much we think, it's how we think.
That also means it's not about deleting thinking, it's not stopping the thinking, it's how can we make it more constructive and move into that more constructive mode.
So to make it practical, think about the moments when you are stuck in a loop, when you're thinking and try to ask yourself, am I in why mode or am I in a how mode? Why mode tends to spiral. Why do I always do this? How mode tends to move us into action, how can I handle this next time?
So if you are stuck in a why mode, your job is gently to switch into the how mode. The second study insight is about rumination, about the past. So of course we ruminate about what has happened, why did it happen?
Maybe we made some mistakes, maybe there are some things we, we are ashamed of. And research by Susan Nolan Hoeksena and her colleagues initially helped establish that rumination is a big risk factor for our mental health.
So if you are ruminating a lot in a quite negative way, that will impact your overall well being. But later on in their work, they realize that rumination comes in two patterns. And one pattern is again quite unconstructive for us and negative.
Another pattern actually can be constructive. So there are two patterns of rumination brooding, which is very much comparison, self criticism, very much, why have I said this? Why I'm so stupid?
Why is this? So it's very much loaded and very much criticizing us as a person. A second type of rumination is reflective pondering.
That is a more purposeful attempt to think, okay, why did that happen? And how can I do things differently? How can I fix it? How can I learn from it? So this idea of lesson learned approach.
So in order to help you to make your overthinking and in this instance rumination more constructive, try to check at the tone.
So when you are ruminating about the past, think about is the tone of my thinking kind and curious, and I'm trying to learn from the past and that's why I'm thinking about my mistake and that's why I'm thinking About messing up? Or is my tone very harsh, very condemning, very not supportive?
And if it's harsh, it's very much a sign to you need a coping tool, you need to release that you need to forgive yourself rather than more analysis of what has happened. And finally, the third insight is about worrying about the future.
So again, we all been there and my overthinking personally is often about the future is this idea that if I will go through lots of different options and have lots of what ifs, I will be able to control future to some extent, which is of course absolutely not true. And when we are in that state of worrying about the future, going through multiple options, worry often can feel quite productive.
But research on worry, including work associated with Thomas Borkowitz, suggests that chronic worry is actually a form of cognitive avoidance. So it keeps us very much in our head, analyzing things and actually avoiding how are we feeling underneath, what are our emotions.
So we can spend hours thinking about the future and get no relief whatsoever. But what we really need is to acknowledge how we feel and actually check in with our nervous system. That's what we need.
We need some emotional awareness and processing. So for example, yes, we might be worrying what's going to happen at work with maybe a colleague we're not having great relationship with.
And we might be worrying and analyzing it. But actually what we need is to getting acknowledging that we feel disappointed that we've been treated in a certain way.
Or maybe we feel angry about it and we need to release those emotions. We have to acknowledge them before we can move into any planning and any solution focused activities.
So in order to make that worrying a bit more constructive is to check in with yourself and ask is this worry producing a plan or is it postponing a feeling?
If it's postponing a feeling, you need some kind of action to release and get in tune with your emotions and to process those emotions rather than yet another plan of pros and cons and what ifs. So to summarize, overthinking is very much of the mind's attempt to care and to protect us from lots of things that we are scared of.
So we don't need to delete this thinking, we need to make it more constructive in the moment we can slow down our thoughts. That's what I covered in episode 229. But longer term, how can we make overthinking more constructive so it works for us rather than against us?
Because if we can make overthinking constructive, we can reap the hidden benefits of overthinking. There are some strengths around overthinking when it stays constructive, pattern detection and risk awareness.
So having very good foresight and being able to understand when things may not work out values clarity.
If you overthinking about certain situation, chances are some of your values are not being met and you need to think, okay, how I can do things differently? What else do I need to sustain my happiness and wellbeing? And of course, learning and reflection.
If we constructively can think about our past, about our mistakes, we can very much learn and grow. And I often use overthinking also in terms of writing and in terms of creativity. How can I use that specific situation for storytelling?
How I can change it into something that is more practical and useful? So absolutely overthinking it can be. When constructive, it can be a very powerful tool.
So thanks so much for being here and if you've been trying any of the tools, I would love to know which one is your favorite. You can connect with me on LinkedIn and also if you are receiving a summary of this month's topic.
If you want to have a little bit more of a written format of everything I'm discussing on the podcast, please join my substack newsletter. Head to my website, the happinesschallenge.co.uk to sign up. So thank you so much everyone. I dare you to be happy.