This podcast episode centers on the profound exploration of self-identity and divine calling, as articulated by Pastor Ed Newton. In our discourse, we delve into the transformative power of belief, particularly the importance of understanding and embracing the identity that God bestows upon us. Pastor Newton shares his personal journey, marked by challenges that shaped his resilience and conviction, ultimately leading him to empower others to recognize their potential in God's mission. The conversation unfolds with insights drawn from his book, "Why Not You?" which serves as a clarion call for individuals to confront self-doubt and to engage wholeheartedly in their divine purpose. Through poignant storytelling and scriptural reflections, we seek to encourage listeners to pursue their God-given calling with unwavering faith and confidence.

Takeaways:

• The Clarity Podcast emphasizes the importance of understanding one's identity in Christ, which shapes our purpose and mission in life.
• Pastor Ed Newton shares profound insights from his life experiences, highlighting the impact of challenges on personal growth and ministry.
• Throughout the episode, there is a strong encouragement to embrace one's calling despite insecurities and self-doubt, believing in God's affirmation.
• The discussion reveals how significant life moments and prophetic words can redirect our paths and instill confidence in pursuing our God-given mission.

Hey there and welcome back to the Clarity Podcast.

This podcast is all about providing clarity insight, encouragement for life and mission.

My name is Aaron Santemaier and I get to be your host.

Today we have the phenomenal opportunity to have with us on the podcast Pastor Ed Newton.

This was a fun podcast for me.

Really enjoyed reading his book why not yout?

And then to see and hear more about the stories that he told in the book and just really appreciate his understanding, his depth of understanding of God's word, his passion to care for others and just a phenomenal time learning from him and appreciate his authenticity and yeah, just a really, really powerful podcast.

Do want to ask you to continue to subscribe to the podcast.

I know the podcasts I subscribe to are the ones I listen to.

They show up on my podcast or on my phone every Tuesday and know what I'm going to be listening to throughout the week.

Thank you all for listening in.

Many of you have listened in from episode one, which was a time ago.

Hopefully I've gotten better as a host since episode one, but thank you for listening in.

It's been a joy and fun and looking forward to the days ahead.

Some new exciting guests and yeah, and some guests to returning from the past.

So also continue sending your questions for Back Channel with Foe.

That's where we get to sit down with Dick Foe and get to learn from him his wisdom, his insight, his experience.

And it's always great to have Dick on the podcast.

Well, there's no time better than now to get started.

So here we go.

Greetings and welcome back to the Clarity Podcast.

So excited to be here today with a new friend of the podcast, Pastor Ed Newton.

Ed, welcome to the podcast.

Hey, thank you so much, Aaron.

It's an honor to be on the show.

Ed, excited to have this conversation.

Today I had the honor to get read your book and yeah, it was and it was great, great encouragement for me.

And so those who have not had the opportunity to read the book, and I love the stories in the book, which, you know, I'm a storyteller myself, so I love reading other people's stor.

Will you share a little bit about yourself before I start asking you a bunch of questions?

Yeah.

I grew up in a home where both my parents were deaf and my mom and dad are in heaven today.

So they're fully healed, but my mom had cerebral palsy.

Where she went to go be healed to.

She was married to my dad and she wouldn't be healed of her deafness.

But she came forward at a tent revival meeting.

And the evangelist prophesied over my mom, who once more was deaf, so didn't understand what he was saying.

Yeah.

My grandmother said to my mom, he just told you you're pregnant?

Well, for six years she was told that she couldn't have children.

She's got cerebral palsy, obviously.

And.

And that's me.

Wow.

So didn't know that.

That was my story.

I'm a, a child of a deaf adult, which is called a coda in the deaf world.

And my whole life, man, I've interpreted for my parents everywhere I went.

I was an only child.

And when I was in my early 30s, I'll be 50 in a couple days.

My.

I asked my father one day, I said, do you wish you could be healed of your deafness?

And my father was like, emphatically, and I know this is an audio show.

He signed the word no.

And he said, and this is the sign for deaf and proud.

And I said, tell me why.

That's the sign for why.

And he goes.

And he says, look at you.

And I said, dad, what do you mean?

He goes, your whole life you have been interpreting for me, and now you are speaking on behalf of God.

Wow.

And he.

And he prepared you in this home for the calling of God on your life.

And so to have a, have a dad and a mom that embraced their disability and knew that God was sovereign and it shaped me.

I'm proud, man, to have two deaf parents that love God, are in heaven.

Can't wait to see them again.

But I am who I am because of growing up in that hardship and a lot of choices along the way that I wish I could get back and get a do over on.

But so, yeah, that's the journey.

And so for me, I was called to ministry at 18 as a senior in high school.

Couldn't pass the SAT.

Made a 540, took it again, got a 560.

And my mom literally signed this to me.

She was like, did you misspell your name?

Come on.

Are you supposed to be an encouragement to me?

And I had a guidance counselor tell me I wasn't college material, all those things.

And that would kind of get baked into a lot of my insecurities along the way.

Ended up at a Christian college because I played basketball.

Don't be too impressed.

It was like Division 14 and nobody cares.

But that's where I met my wife and got trained in gospel ministry and began the journey of a youth pastor my senior year of college.

Which is super cool, Aaron, to have every home game, have signs from the youth group.

That's our youth pastor.

So that was super cool.

Nothing like being hyped up by your own kids that you lead on the weekends.

And super amazing.

And then went to Memphis to go to grad school, shout out to Mid America Baptist Theological Seminary, where my wife and I began to plant in Memphis.

Our roots had four children, three biological, one adopted from Africa.

And we served on staff at a church there as college pastor, single adult pastor, recreation pastor, all those things.

And God called me into evangelism.

And that's.

That's a wild story of something where God just called me out of the blue of that.

And began that journey of crisscrossing the country for 13 years, preaching primarily to middle school, high school, college students doing revivals.

You know, when the youth pastor came home and said to pastor, so.

And so, you're gonna love this youth guy.

I think you can talk to adults, you know.

And so I get my.

My one little JCPenney suit, little like a Beatles tie, you know, and my one pair of loafers.

And, man, I had hair down on my shoulders.

And, you know, I try to figure out how to slick that back and go do a revival.

And did that for 13 years, man.

And then all of a sudden I got a phone call to be a pastor of a church.

God had been wrestling in my soul with that about that calling.

And I'd been a guest preacher at this church for six years at a men's conference.

And so here's a guy that's never pastored before who takes over a church of 12,000 people, 369 staff members, and I've never done that before.

And imposter syndrome, you read about that in the book.

And by the way, thank you for even reading the book.

I can now put on Amazon that one person has read the book.

So I'm gonna.

I'm gonna take that and five star myself on Amazon because of you, my friend.

There you go.

So, yeah, that began the journey, man.

And then obviously, just God used, you know, Proverbs says a man is tested by his praise, but also also his criticism.

And, man, there was a lot of things that I did not realize about myself that Was operating out of insufficiency, inadequacy.

And you know, that whole idea, fake it till you make it.

Because that's what I was trying to do, because I was taught that in school at a seminary.

Professor Aaron, that was like.

He's like, hey, boys, you know, man, you're gonna all be new.

Just fake it till you make it.

And I'll.

And I just.

That played in the back of my mind.

I'm like, here I am leading this staff team.

Never done this before.

Have to lay off 42 staff members because the budget decreased.

And paper writes an article.

Church is falling apart.

New pastor.

4, 000 people leave the church, Aaron, over a span of a year.

And my world imploded.

And.

But here I am.

Fake it till you make it.

Wearing my little skinny suits every day, trying to get people to respect me when I didn't even respect myself.

And God met me in Kalamazoo, Michigan.

And for those that are listening to your show, they're from Kalamazoo, Michigan.

It's a.

It's.

I didn't know God was in Kalamazoo Mission.

I didn't know that God.

God had that kind of jurisdiction.

Jurisdiction, to be honest with you.

And God met me, man.

He met me a full encounter with the Holy Spirit through an incredible counselor named Brian Stone, through Blessing Ranch, and began to get to the root of my insufficiencies.

And it was all rejection.

Rejection can be a tape that plays in the head of a leader or a missionary as your audience is connected to and man.

It caused me to operate for performance, in performance, for the purpose of acceptance.

And I began to discover man when God spoke over Jesus.

The Father spoke over Jesus and said, this is my son, in whom I'm well pleased.

Jesus had never done a miracle, never walked on water, never took five loaves, two fish.

Did the.

Did the miraculous.

He spoke over Jesus words of acceptance before he ever did a single thing.

Yeah.

And so Jesus moves from acceptance, not for acceptance.

And this is where this began to rebuild for me along the way.

And.

And now we're on this show, and I'm trying to liberate a lot of leaders from a performance mentality, but also embrace a message for.

I mean, if there's somebody listening to your show right now that doesn't struggle with confidence, doesn't struggle with belief, this book isn't for them, but for the Struggler.

That goes, God, I know you called me, but I don't have a healthy view of me, and that needs to change.

And I need to get a God perspective of how you see me.

And I need to believe what you believe about me.

And I need to stop sinning in disbelief of not trusting you for what you have proclaimed to pronounce and destined over my life.

Then this book's for you.

Yeah, this is a spiritual chiropractor book right here, man.

It's gonna.

It's gonna line some people up because it did for me.

Yeah, it's.

Good word.

Good word.

So I want to start back.

Thanks for sharing your personal story.

I want to start back with one of the first stories you share in the book about a woman speaking prophetically into your life at a very young age and how this impacted you.

Man, I'm 10 years old at a McDonald's, and nine or 10 right there in that space.

And I'm interpreting for my parents.

As I said earlier, everywhere we went, I'd interpret them.

We're at a McDonald's, I interpret, you know, whatever my parents ordered.

Then it's me.

I'm trying to get a Happy Meal, trying to figure out what's in the.

In the box and.

And take a step back.

And a sweet African American woman, elderly woman, puts her hand on my shoulder.

And she.

She asked the question, so gentle, so kind, and she said.

She goes, do you do this everywhere you go?

I said, yes, ma'.

Am.

And she.

And I'll never forget it.

Never knew her name.

I. I can't wait to get to heaven to see her, man.

I pause it because I get emotional just thinking about it.

She goes, one day, God's gonna greatly use you.

I wasn't even a Christian.

I didn't even come to know Jesus until five years later.

But she planted a seed of belief that my life wasn't an accident, that as hard as this was, God was going to use it.

And she saw something in me I didn't even see in myself.

And it's the power of belief.

It's the power of words.

It's the power of the prophetic, in my humble opinion, of which, Aaron, I. I grew up Baptist, so I get saved.

And I grew up in a Baptist church.

And the word prophecy is just words you would read.

You would never hear anybody talk out.

And you didn't know if that was taboo.

And prophecy was like Magic 8 balls and Ouija boards.

You know, it's like.

But, man, since.

Since I had an encounter with The Holy Spirit several years ago.

I now look back on that moment you're talking about and went, dear God, oh, despite me, you were wooing me and calling me and using people to speak life into me.

So I'm here today because of women and men that believed in me prophetically that when I didn't believe in myself, wow.

You know, I'm in a season of life.

It's an interesting season of life and I don't know why I've been self reflective in the last probably month or two.

Just thinking about all the people that God has placed in my life as strategic seasons.

And some of the people I maybe like the lady at McDonald's you didn't see again, but people that God, you know, I wouldn't be here today without God bringing those people into my life for that season and what I needed and distantness.

Just a heart of gratitude and thanks.

Just that, that our heavenly Father knows and that he sees us and he brings those peoples in, bring those people into our lives at that time.

And so yeah, and my prayer is I can be that for other people.

I pray that I can be that for other people too.

We know that story.

Yeah.

Dismisses his servant, goes underneath the broom tree and goes, God, I'm done, kill me.

And at that moment an angel of the Lord shows up.

Come on, somebody.

An angel of the Lord shows up and we don't know that's Jesus.

We, I mean we don't know, but an angel with hot bread and a refreshing drink and feeds them.

And I think about what you just said, that how many quote unquote angels of the Lord, which means messenger, God has sent to the broom tree of our discouragement and said, get up.

The journey's too great for you.

I know, but get up.

You're not alone, you know, in this journey.

So.

No, I agree.

Spot on here.

Good word.

You, you mentioned a little bit earlier about the self doubt and, and in the book you talk about some of the reasons self doubt can creep into our lives.

Can you just share a few of those?

Yeah.

The self doubt for me, I think when we talked about earlier, just I'm not smart enough.

It's all the I'm not enough phrases which is really interesting, man.

When you think about self doubt there, there is an immense.

When we talk about nature, nurture.

Nature is how we're wired.

Nurture is how we've been shaped and sculpted along our life's journey and when it came to nature and how I was wired in how, how I looked fair skin to our audience.

Probably can't see me right now.

I got a lot of tattoos that cover up a lot of these freckles right now.

But for me, I, man, I struggled in my own skin.

I struggled.

I had red hair as a kid.

That came with a lot of teasing.

First day of school.

Ronald Newton.

My last name's Newton.

I went by Edward or Ed is my middle name.

And.

But man, that, you know, red hair, first name's Ronald.

So you're gonna get Ronald McDonald, you know, so all of those, man, all of that, you know, you just kind of laugh and you, you dismiss it.

But man, as there's a book out that says the body keeps score.

Yeah.

So your mind is just rutting these, these phrases.

And so what ends up happening in self doubt for me then, it wasn't just physical, it was educational where I just felt slow.

I got this, man, Aaron, this is the crazy part for anybody that actually gets the audiobook, man, I'm.

I got a form of dyslexia.

Two days I had to read 18 chapters into a microphone and words move for me.

And what's crazy is that earlier on, now I know that God, as 2nd Corinthians 12 says, uses the weaknesses to make himself strong, such as my learning disability, my add, my adhd, combined with my insecurity of just being in my own skin, a hair color, all of that as a kid, I didn't see as God's perfect in all his ways.

Yeah, I saw.

It's like God messed up when he made me and why do I have to live in a deaf home?

And, you know, it was all, why me?

Why me?

Why me?

Why me?

And that's why this book matters to me.

Because it's not why me, it's why not me.

God's going to use somebody to change the world.

And typically, and I think you would testify to this end, because before the show of where you're at today and the encouragement you are to many, most likely out of your deepest pain that you've ever faced, myself included, God redeems it and gives the purpose of it in the anointing that's on your life.

And I speak that as a blessing over you, as it's evident comes from the crushing in the spaces that you were like, God, what are you doing?

And God was crushing because that's in the moment where the Release of the aroma of the anointing takes place.

Everybody wants anointing, but they don't want crushing.

That's true.

That's true.

So.

So God used the crushing of what I was feeling and facing my whole life, internal, external, leading me to a place of the mission and mandate on your life is probably going to be redeemed from the messiest places of your life.

Good word.

Good word.

You.

And that's kind of my.

My question for you about God's preparation and you've.

You hit on a little bit, but you taught, you wrote in the book you wrote, and I copied it down, was that your upbringing has prepared you.

Your experiences and your experiences burden you for similar challenges, and your mistakes have not disqualified you.

Is there one or two of those that really speak to you today?

I mean, obviously those are your words.

Those are your words.

But your upbringing has prepared you.

Somebody listening in today, maybe they're.

They're wondering about God's preparation and where they're at in the season of life, but this is an encouragement that their upbringing has prepared them.

Their experiences burden them for similar challenges, and their mistakes have not disqualified them.

Any thoughts on that?

Yeah, absolutely.

And I think it's a little bit of a tongue tie to say your experiences have burdened you.

You're like, what do you mean, burdened you?

You know, and you read that correctly.

That's not.

You didn't say it incorrectly.

I wrote it that way.

But it's a.

It's a matter of that sometimes from.

From your deepest burdens that you have carried, that that burden has been infused by a particular problem that you saw that you go, there needs to be an answer to that.

There needs to be a solution to that.

And think about this.

Missions exist because of, as John Piper said, because there's a lack of worship directed at Yahweh God.

So as you're encouraging missionaries, the fact that somebody's a missionary is because they felt a call of God.

But you felt a call of God because there was a burden of God on your heart, that those that don't know God will come to know God.

And so the burden on you is the fuel of worship in you.

So that's the root of it.

We will never tell people about Jesus or live a missionary lifestyle on a missionary field.

I think every field is a missionary field, but we'll never begin to move in a heart of evangelism if it's not worship that's the fuel for it.

But when we think about our burdens, I just Want to ask the question what to our audience, what has God placed on your heart?

That is a bird.

And I'll say this out loud.

One of my burdens is the fact that, that there is a biblically illiterate generation that I have been raised amongst that don't know the scripture.

And so one of my original burdens on my heart was to eradicate biblical literacy, which drives me to be a communicator that, that goes, this is what the Word says.

So I teach verse by verse, exegetical, all of those things so that people walk away and go, not that Ed is awesome, but I want to know the Word.

Yeah, I, I want to know the Word.

So my burden is driven by a problem.

And the problem is X in my life exists to, to, to answer that, that problem.

And that's what I meant by that.

So for me, where God has shifted here lately is for, for the one that feels like the outcast, for the one that feels marginalized, for the one that feels.

And, and it's not just those that are destitute and poverty or persecution, it's those that live enslaved in, in their own mindset of it's always going to be this way or God's going to bless everybody else but me and man.

That's not the heart of a loving Father.

So I have a deep burden to, to correctly help people understand who the Father is, the Holy Spirit that he has placed within you and, and truly, Aaron, this is the, the heart of it.

The same power that raised Jesus from the dead is alive in us.

So if I know that there's resurrection power in me, then why do I live in defeat today?

Yeah.

So that's, that's, that's what I mean by that bird language.

Yeah.

You know, it's, it's.

I don't, I read through the book and it was until we started talking today.

So, you know, we're missions wise, we're focused on unengaged, unreached people groups.

And you know, some of it as you look through the list, one of the across countries unengaged, unreached people groups are those that are, that are deaf.

That there's not, there's not a, there's not people there.

So anyways, you talk, I don't know why, it just struck me as you.

Were talking, most unreached people group.

Yeah, most unreached people group in the world is deaf people.

And so, and then when you talked about your, when you started talking about your experiences, I think that's when it hit to me I'm like, your experience is God.

You had that opportunity to grow up in that home, and then you understand that anyway, so we'll see.

But let me make this comment.

Let me make this comment real quick.

So he.

So I wrestled initially like, God, are you calling me be a pastor for the deaf?

And I never felt a clarion call.

Yeah, but.

But here I am as the pastor of a church that has integrated sign language into the house of what we do.

And so we have a deaf pastor who's a deaf congregation.

We teach American Sign Language.

We have deaf services.

And when I say services.

Support services.

Sure.

And you go, okay, God, you didn't call me be a deaf pastor, but you asked me to pastor deaf people.

Yeah.

So absolutely.

Yeah, yeah.

In the book, you talk about the story of Moses and you kind of use as somewhat of a framework, how does his story, Moses story delineate?

Why not you?

Yeah, man.

Here's the thing that.

That I have been so intrigued by.

And you.

And you got to read this.

The New Testament version of Stephen in Acts, chapter seven says that as Stephen is dying, he gives this account of Moses and says, and Moses believed that God called him to be a deliverer of Egypt while in Egypt.

I don't know if you've ever thought about this.

So, like, I'm gonna.

I just want to fact check it just so you can.

Because it is mind blown to me that actually when we think about Moses specifically, he.

He believed that he was to be the deliverer of Israel while living in Egypt, putting two and two together, that because of his.

Yeah, here it is.

It says at this time, Moses was born.

He was beautiful in God's sight, and he was brought up for three months in his father's house.

And when he was exposed, Pharaoh's daughter adopted him, brought him up as her own son.

And Moses was instructed in all the wisdom of the Egyptians.

And he was mighty in words and deeds.

And when he was 40 years old, it came into his heart to visit the brothers, the children of Israel.

And seeing one of them being wrong, he defended the oppressed man, avenged him by striking down the Egyptian.

Which we know that story, right?

Sure.

But verse 25, he supposed that his brothers would understand that God was giving them salvation by his hand, but they did not understand.

So his motivation and breaking up this fight was a belief that they would come to the conclusion, Aaron.

That they would come to a conclusion.

Do you not see that God has put me here?

Which tells me something.

That burning bush moment that comes when he's 80 is not the first time he felt a call of God.

He felt it at 40.

Yeah, it's a good word.

And then all of a sudden, he kills the Egyptian, buries that dude in the sand, and becomes Egypt's most wanted.

Which means that he felt a call of God in Acts 7:25 that says at 40.

And then for 40 years ran from this call.

And all the while, when Exodus 3 begins to unfold all those excuses, you know, it's just, why me?

I'm not.

And that's the reason why I used is because deep down inside Moses, this is the part I need our audience to hear.

Deep down inside of Moses at 40, he knew that God had a plan for his life.

Yeah.

But because it didn't go the way he thought it was supposed to go, he runs.

But aren't you grateful for God that that doesn't give up and meets him on the backside of the mountain and goes, hey, man, go back.

Because I. I don't know if you know this because you probably doubted it.

Who's the most gifted, most qualified, most equipped to go back to the Egyptians that know the culture, knows the language, knows the structure, knows the education, knows the politics, knows the administrator, you know, everything.

And all the while, Moses was going, I'm not the best.

I'm not qualified.

Moses, yo, you speak the language.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

How many missionaries are going, God, if I just knew the language, I could be used of you in a greater level.

Moses knew all those things and was making excuse after excuse after excuse.

And finally God looks at Moses and goes, who made your mouth?

As I say, I can give you the words.

Just do what I'm telling you to do.

And that is the essence of why not you?

Is to believe what God believes about you.

When all of the doubts and insecurities speak louder than what God says.

Yeah.

And that's.

I'm going to jump questions.

But, you know, the idea.

I never thought about this, but you said the idea of our battles are not necessarily between good and evil, but between what God says about us and what we believe about ourselves.

Yeah.

So that.

Any more thoughts on that?

Because, you know.

Yeah.

I quote often, you know, the enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy.

Yeah.

You know, impede those that are planning the church.

But then, you know, it really made me think.

Well, the reality of it is some of my battle is I'm not believing what God says about me.

So, anyway, any more thoughts on that?

Yeah, that's a great question.

Here, let me first and foremost, I am Ephesians 6 guy.

Like there's a battle not in flesh and blood, principalities, demonic forces and.

And we wage war in the heavenly places, you know, through spirits of spirit of intercession and obviously giftings of the spirit.

I am that guy.

Yeah.

But I think a lot of times that pendulum is like, well, the devil's making me believe wrong thoughts and the devil's is causing me to be insecure.

When in reality I think it goes back to Genesis.

The enemy's so crafty.

Did God surely say it wasn't like, okay, here's the fruit, you know, of like, look how shiny it is.

Oh, no.

It was more along the lines of, did God surely say, yeah, and I believe that the greatest attack of the enemy in this regard is the cause self doubt within us of what did God really set?

And I think that's the heart of your question.

Because if we could doubt whether or not God really means this when he says, you're more than a conqueror.

Doubt.

Greater is he that's in me than he that's in me.

Doubt no weapon formed against you shall prosper.

Doubt if you confess your sin, he's faithful.

I mean, doubt all of that.

And I think that's what happens.

So you start in that moment, begin being unraveled.

And really that that statement that you're, you're referencing came out of a conversation with a guy.

And I think that you read this in the book where a guy goes, hey, is it a sin not to believe what God believes about you?

And the answer is yes.

I think one of the, the sins that we commit on a regular basis and don't even.

I think it's a sin of omission.

We don't even know we're doing it.

Yeah.

Is that we doubt what God has said about us.

And you ever had that moment, Aaron, with your kids?

I'm assuming you have children.

And that moment where your kid lacks faith, lacks belief having taken the test and they're going to fail it, haven't even played the game and they feel like they're going to not be good at it.

And you ever had that moment, Aaron, when you look at your kids and you go, if I could just give you my confidence for you, if I can give you my belief in one particular day.

I was like the ultimate hype guy for my kid on a science test she was about to take.

And I'm horrible at science.

I'm like, you got this, you know, God, God's got, you know, come on, Walk in that room in faith.

And, and I, she gets out of the car and I'm going, God, can she just believe what I believe for her?

And the spirit of God just convicts me and goes, that's what I'm trying to tell you.

Yeah, that's what I'm, and here's the crazy thing.

You're going, if I can just put my spirit inside of her to believe what I believe in, God goes, hello, Holy Spirit is inside of you.

Yeah, so that's good words, good word.

And that's, that's the beauty of your book.

It's full of illustrations and, and you're a master at that.

I, you know, I, you know, on the podcast, people hear me say it a lot.

I, I've listened to, I grew up in the church from 0 till 40 some.

I'm 48 now.

I've listened a lot of sermons.

I remember a lot of stories.

I don't necessarily remember all the three points of the, the, I can remember the three points of the sermon if I remember the story.

And that's.

You have story, you have stories that stick, that help get me back to.

Get me back to the points.

Which is, which is, which is great.

Somebody listening in today.

Pastor ED maybe they, you know, they, they're on the field or they might be in a different place and they, they feel stuck.

You know, they, they felt, they, they followed God's call.

They, they, they're in a place and they thought they were doing what God was calling them to do, but they now at a place where they feel stuck.

What is, what's a step?

What steps can they begin taking?

To begin to walk boldly in God's calling and, and trusting in him.

Yeah.

I would say to somebody today, first and foremost in the missionaries and anybody outside that concentric circle of your platform, because it's a very broad platform and significant.

I speak blessing on that to the missionaries that are faithful, man.

Do not grow weary and well doing.

I think sometimes we find ourselves, and I would dare to say that everybody that's at the tip of the spear in missionary work goes, God is what I'm doing advancing the kingdom.

And I think what ends up happening is that we have tendencies.

And I know this is not true of your agency in the assembly of God specific in regards to numbers and metrics and all those kind of things that determine success.

But I know this to be true of your denomination and I know this to be true of you.

It's faithfulness.

Stay faithful to the call of God on your Life.

Because I think so many times we end up in moments of doubt and discouragement because we wonder if we've been properly placed in that season.

And we begin to doubt the call of God.

I love what it's already been said by Charles Spurgeon.

You don't undo in the dark, which you saw in the light.

And so for somebody that saw that call to go where they're at, going, I'm not seeing the fruit.

I'm not seeing the advancement.

I'm not seeing what I thought I was going to see.

And there's discouragement beginning to creep into somebody's heart going, then maybe I'm not being properly used.

Maybe it's me.

Maybe it's.

I'm not good enough.

I'm not.

Maybe if there was somebody else in this place, that there would be more of an exponential work.

And I just want to say to somebody today, please don't go down that road, because that's not the heart of the Father for you.

Yeah.

The heart of the Father for you is to stay faithful where God has planted you.

I'm going to share an illustration.

Aaron, is it okay if I tell the story?

You got it.

I was in Amsterdam leading a mission trip for various youth groups across.

Excuse me.

It was Madrid, Spain.

I've led different mission trips.

It was in Madrid, Spain, and we were there year.

I led this trip twice where student youth pastors would bring their youth groups and we would begin to evangelize in Madrid.

So about maybe 13, 15 different ministry sites.

I was in charge of working with missionary to do contextual ministry.

One of the mission sites was in a park.

And day one, you know, everybody's excited.

We're.

We're having our time of worship.

We pack our lunch bags, and then we're gonna evangelize the city, and we're gonna come back after dinner and we're gonna have a debrief session.

And you.

You've led enough of those, I'm sure.

And this youth group from Alabama comes back, and they're like, hey, we got a problem.

We were at that park that you assigned to us with the missionary, and not a single person came into the park.

We got our soccer balls, we got our frisbees, we got our face paint.

We got our balloons.

We got.

And nobody, literally nobody came into the park.

I was like, hey, man, just give it another day.

Nobody.

End of the week, check this out.

End of the week, nobody comes into the park.

So day two of this trip, I'm working with a missionary, and I'M like, hey, man, I know how this works.

We're gonna get to the end of this week.

This evaluation is not gonna be really good.

And this youth pastor is making it really evident, like, hey, man, thousands of dollars to come here, and we've done nothing.

You know what they were saying, Aaron?

We didn't lead anybody to Jesus.

We didn't.

This is what they were saying.

We didn't get to have the experience of a missionary.

And.

And so the missionary says, we're going to pray the seasons of the harvest.

And I know you guys teach this stuff.

And so we're going to till the soil.

We're just gonna.

We're gonna prayer walk.

Yeah.

So they prayer walk for five full days, have their worship service.

Sure enough, end of the week, evaluation comes, they fill it all out, they leave it.

Everybody leaves.

I go through the evaluate evaluations, man, and I.

It's.

It's not good.

We wasted our money.

Our kids had a horrible experience.

God didn't use us.

All of that.

And we just move on.

You're like, God, okay, apologize.

I said, hey, brother, I'm sorry.

Didn't turn out to be what you thought.

All right, fast forward next year, all right?

I'm going somewhere with this.

Next year, we do the same trip again.

And that group chose not to come back because they had a bad experience.

And you know where the revival was at, Aaron?

In that park that nobody was at the next year, I mean, they were.

They were baptizing people.

They were leading people to Jesus.

They were.

That group came back.

Yeah.

Different group.

Yeah.

Bragging on Move of God, Wind of God, Spirit of God, Pentecost, fire.

And I took that youth pastor and I said, hey, man, I need you to understand something.

Yeah, brother, you have walked it.

Come on, somebody receive this.

You walked into a labor.

Yeah.

That you did not plow.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You walked into a season of the harvest that a team last year didn't even fully understand what they were doing.

And I speak that over somebody today that's listening.

You may not be seeing what you're seeing, but what if I were to tell you, because of your faithfulness and because of the fact that you're just choosing each and every day to just do what God's called you to do, that you're plowing a field spiritually, that the increase in the harvest may not come in your lifetime?

But what if Galatians 6 is true?

The harvest is coming.

If you don't grow, you grow weary and give up.

Yeah, that's a good Word, good word.

And once again, powerful, powerful illustration.

Got one last question for you, Pastor Ed, and then I'm going to ask you if you'll pray for us.

How does.

You kind of mentioned it there about walking in the spirit.

But how does walking in the spirit help us navigate the everyday struggles, fears, and the insecurities we have?

Aaron, you brother, you're assembly God.

I came out of the bat, man.

This is all new for me.

I.

All I know is this.

It's in your book.

So he was in your book, so.

I thought I'm gonna ask him about it.

Hey, man, I speak in tongues now.

I promise you.

All of this is new.

Yeah, all of this is new for me.

So I'm about five years into.

I was a cessationist, man.

Okay.

And then.

But here's what happens.

And this is what I know about missionaries.

I. I believe this to be true.

Most guys like me operate with a very low view of the Spirit.

Didn't mean that I didn't believe in the Holy Spirit.

I believed in the Holy Spirit.

I just believe that the way that the Holy Spirit worked in the New Testament scriptures is not the way he works today.

Hello.

That's a whole different mindset for me.

And the reason why I think people could live that way is because they don't need.

They don't have a need for the Spirit because their programs are sufficient.

Their building is nice.

They got.

They got an offering, they got.

But.

But I know this to be true.

When your life falls apart and your family begins to face the attack of the enemy, and your children may not be living the way that, that you want them to be living, or you're facing the lions, then you.

You got to have a power source that sustains you in the darkest of days.

And I would say that your missionaries have a dependency on the Holy Spirit because they're facing demonic warfare.

They're facing challenges, they're fake facing opposition.

So programs ain't going to rescue them out of that situation.

A really cool worship center with some stained glass or an LED wall is going to help them in that moment.

They need the Holy Spirit of God.

And what I found out in the lowest days of my life, when all of what, you know, our church is.

I'm nothing without the Spirit.

And I'm gonna give credit to a guy that, you know, Max Okedo.

Yeah.

Who had an encounter with the Holy Spirit.

And I reference him in the book An Encounter with the Holy spirit himself.

Late 60s, he's in the 70s now, and he and he wrote a book on the helper of the Holy Spirit.

Dynamic gifts, discerning gifts.

Dynamic gifts, you know.

And man, he just walked with me.

Yeah.

And he, and he.

And he asked this question to me.

He said, ed, with.

He said, at Christmas time, do you open up every gift with your name on it?

I was like, pastor Max, of course, who doesn't?

He goes, christians.

I was like, what are you talking about?

He goes, the Holy Spirit of God has written their name as the book of Corinthians speaks about that.

Every believer has spiritual gifts assigned to them.

How many Christians leave gifts under the cross of Calvary with their name on it that never gets opened.

And I begin to pray.

Prayer, yeah, God, whatever gift that has my name on it, I want to open it.

Show me.

And that's what happened.

And I would say to everybody, what a beautiful reality to wake up every day and go, oh, Holy Spirit.

So, yeah, I'm more assembly God man than I was.

It's a good word.

You know, I say missionaries, we've voluntarily entered into a spiritual war, you know, and when you voluntarily enter into a spiritual war, you need the power of the Holy Spirit.

You need the boldness, you need his protection, need his discernment and he's insight.

Pastor Ed, it's been an honor to spend some time with you today.

I think if I live in your town, I love.

Well, you're probably too busy to go out to lunch with me, but I would love, love to.

Went out lunch with you, spend some time with you.

I would be honored.

Kindred spirits and your.

Your.

The.

The love you have for people and the love you have for Jesus.

Jesus Christ is palpable on zoom.

So you pray for us.

Absolutely, Father, I thank you for Pastor Aaron.

God, a gifted man who has faithfully served you in the amongst the nations and now is caring and stewarding a calling on his life for an incredible army of missionaries.

And for that brother and sister and their family, God, I pray blessing, protection, bloodline of Jesus over their lives.

God for health, God for spiritual peace and guidance and direction.

Solomon, wisdom, faith bigger than Mary.

God, vision like Isaiah, God, I pray that you would give them a commitment and zeal to choose to live a life that would be countercultural to the very attacks of the enemy that they face and even the cultural attacks that they face.

And so, God, I pray over this missionary fleet of men and women who have said yes to you, God, use them in profound ways.

May the gospel go to the ends of the earth.

Thank you for their commitment.

God I pray for the weary soul, the weary pilgrimage, the weary traveler, the weary son and daughter of God.

I pray their soul will be lifted and they would begin to believe their very best about themselves because of what you've said about them.

Not a self confidence, but a God confidence that we walk into spaces and places and we would no longer apologize for our insecurities.

But God, we walk in the fullness of a confidence that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us in Jesus name.

Amen.

Amen.

Sa.