Ever wonder why does my child get hyper at night… just when you’re ready to wind down? 

If you’ve ever felt like your kids have had an espresso right before bed, you’re not alone. Those bedtime zoomies – when kids suddenly start bouncing off the walls – can make creating a bedtime routine for kids feel impossible. 

But what if I told you that this chaos has a reason? In this episode, I’m joined by pediatric occupational therapist Emma Wilking Ghelber to break down why bedtime zoomies happen and share calming activities for kids before bed to help your evenings run more smoothly.

Emma shares the science behind bedtime zoomies and offers simple ways to help kids shift from high-energy to wind-down mode. If your current bedtime routine for kids feels like a wrestling match every night, these tips can make a big difference.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why does my child get hyper at night? – The surprising reasons your child might be getting more energized as the evening wears on.
• Bedtime zoomies – What they really mean, and why your child isn’t just trying to drive you crazy.
• Calming activities for kids before bed – Three simple, effective strategies to help kids settle down without adding to your stress.
• How to adjust your bedtime routine for kids to set the stage for better sleep, fewer battles, and a calmer home.

Ready to ditch the chaos and make bedtime smoother for everyone? Listen to the full episode for expert-backed strategies, calming activities for kids before bed and a bedtime routine for kids you can start using tonight.

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[00:00:23] Leah Clionsky: And here's the problem. We are all running into. Imagine it is nighttime. You've had dinner, you are exhausted, and you want your kids to go to bed, and they are jumping off the walls. I wanna lie on the couch. They wanna jump off the couch. They have the zoomies. What do we do about this? So I have brought on an amazing guest who is going to talk to us about why our kids are doing this and what to do about it.

[00:01:17] Leah Clionsky: And a real life parent of two young children, I am the same as you. I am invested in being the best parent possible and raising thriving children. I also get overwhelmed. I make mistakes and I forget what works. I do have three unique parenting advantages that you may not have. A PhD in child clinical psychology, over 15 years of clinical experience working with families and a network of other experts that I can text for parenting advice whenever I'm lost.

[00:02:17] Leah Clionsky: Emma believes strongly in the power of relationships and ensuring foundational and developmentally appropriate skills are addressed first when working, um, playing with children and their families. So welcome, Emma. I'm just so excited that you're here.

[00:02:41] Leah Clionsky: Yay. It's awesome that you're here and we get to talk about OT and parenting.

[00:02:48] Leah Clionsky: And nighttime zoomies, because this is an issue,

[00:03:02] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Yeah. Occupational therapists are supporting people and engaging, not necessarily in. Occupations that we think of purely as work, but in everyday meaningful activities. And for adults that might be getting back to work after an injury. But for kids, their primary occupations in the day-to-day are play, learning, socializing, eating.

[00:03:52] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Our ability to engage in everyday activities. We learn about our sensory systems in school and we learn [00:04:00] about those five of visual, auditory, taste, smell, and tactile. We have three others, so there's a total of eight. Two that are movement systems and give us information about where our body is in space and so that we feel good and grounded.

[00:04:37] Emma Wilking Ghelber: And when one is out of whack, it can throw the whole system out of whack and can throw our bodies into fight or flight. And what does it look like for kids? Those are the meltdowns. Those are the tantrums, the crying, the running away from you, laughing hysterically when there's nothing funny about what's going on.

[00:04:58] Emma Wilking Ghelber: It's awful. [00:05:00] I know that. It's literally a nervous system response, and when my son does it, I lose it. Yeah, it's like my trigger.

[00:05:20] Leah Clionsky: And part of why they do annoying stuff.

[00:05:43] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Oh, I'm gonna be exhausted after this birthday party that we're going to this weekend, so I'm gonna plan accordingly. Kids don't have that, and so then they're even worse that evening. They are bouncing off the walls.

[00:06:07] Emma Wilking Ghelber: So first step, figuring out which systems are processing information efficiently and giving the right information, and then also figuring out which ones need a little help. More times than not, there is not just one system out of whack because they all impact each other and figuring out what. Best supports that individual child in being regulated.

[00:07:02] Emma Wilking Ghelber: And then also use a lot of the strategies that I'm sure you employ Leah with kids and helping give top-down strategies where we talk about, oh, I did hear that loud bang. I wonder what it was. Should we go check it out? Or should we ask someone to check for us and help? Bringing kids a sense of security around that sensory experience that they can push through whatever was upsetting for them to help know that their body is safe.

[00:07:42] Emma Wilking Ghelber: I would honestly say that is a majority of the time what's happening. Kids aren't wired to be bad and misbehave. They are oftentimes having difficulty because I.

[00:08:06] Leah Clionsky: So this is why I think what you guys do, what occupational therapists do, and what your clinic does, that's. So extremely helpful is that when we have kids who are clearly physically, centrally uncomfortable

[00:08:19] Emma Wilking Ghelber: They need

[00:08:34] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Yes. To understand why this is happening. My kid was on the playground and swinging, and it turns out they have.

[00:08:58] Leah Clionsky: That makes so much sense. [00:09:00] Do you run into this with your three-year-old at home?

[00:09:04] Emma Wilking Ghelber: I do. My three-year-old is a mover and a shaker. Dropped naps definitely by two and a half and just he needs to move and he comes by it. Honestly, I was in sports growing up. My husband has. A DHD and needs to be moving throughout his day and then as a couch potato at night, of course.

[00:09:57] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Because it is a little bit more work on my [00:10:00] part when we're playing, but I know that it is going to be helpful in terms of limiting the number of meltdowns we have as the day progresses.

[00:10:20] Leah Clionsky: It's energy out in a strategic way so that he's regulated and then he's better able to follow directions, for example.

[00:10:42] Emma Wilking Ghelber: They have a physiological need to get input to their muscle and joint systems, and that actually helps them regulate. They are getting input that causes their nervous system to calm down. It's why some of us as adults know, Hey, I have to [00:11:00] get. My exercise in, I have to get my yoga in. My body needs that to feel calm and good.

[00:11:33] Leah Clionsky: But I, I suspect that's not what is actually happening. So why aren't they doing it?

[00:11:59] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Their bodies [00:12:00] just go, BA, I'm tired, so I'm gonna fight that feeling and just go, go, go.

[00:12:13] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Exactly.

[00:12:15] Emma Wilking Ghelber: And so we have to fight smarter, not harder.

[00:12:19] Leah Clionsky: Yeah. If I think about them as trying to do the same thing that I want, but just not doing it in a way that I recognize is helpful, immediately my frustration goes down. And I know that always helps me parent better if I'm not frustrated.

[00:12:38] Emma Wilking Ghelber: It's my telltale sign for my son that, okay, we gotta start thinking about bedtime. He's jumping like a maniac on the couch. I don't say stop jumping on the couch. What I do is, oh, can you show me how you do a summeral? On the couch because doing a somersault on the couch versus jumping on the couch, I'm just gonna kind of break [00:13:00] down why it is helpful for helping him calm down.

[00:13:26] Emma Wilking Ghelber: It's not just chaotic jumping and getting input only through his feet. So then he's also getting input to the entire backside of his body as he goes through the somersault. And that deep pressure that he gets then from the couch, lowers our respiration rate, lowers our heart rate. And so then even just after one somersault, he is more able to engage with me.

[00:14:05] Leah Clionsky: This makes so much sense. Yeah. So what, what I'm hearing you say is it's not. The movement, it's about like a certain kind of movement.

[00:14:23] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Okay. Tell me what happens.

[00:14:38] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Okay. First idea. You mentioned earlier your kids like to wrestle, right?

[00:14:43] Emma Wilking Ghelber: So can they, well, can they lift off the couch cushions from the couch and line 'em up on the floor?

[00:14:57] Emma Wilking Ghelber: It would work with pillows too.

[00:15:02] Leah Clionsky: Okay. So I want them to line things up and I want them, what is the rolling doing that's helping?

[00:15:20] Emma Wilking Ghelber: They're getting rotation to their head and they have to activate their core to continue to roll across the pillows. So all of that input combined is calming their nervous system and is much more effective than while flinging limbs at one another for wrestling.

[00:15:44] Leah Clionsky: That's when your kids lie, like straight up and down on the floor? Yes. And they roll their entire body, like left and right across the floor. Like literally like a log that you can imagine? Yes. Or like a pencil sort of rolling.

[00:15:56] Leah Clionsky: Okay.

[00:16:02] Emma Wilking Ghelber: And two, that gives them what we call an OT heavy work to move the pillows to the floor. And then, okay, let's see how fast we can put the couch back together. Yes, we're telling them to quote unquote, go fast right before bedtime, which seems counterintuitive, but they have these big, heavy pillows that they're carrying, and it's purposeful and it's intentional, which is different from running around with the zoomies.

[00:16:39] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Another great one and has worked really well with my son so, so much to the fact that we have to do it as part of like before bedtime is doing animal walks.

[00:17:23] Emma Wilking Ghelber: So let's do after we. Put our dishes by the sink. Let's crawl like a bear to the couch. Ooh, can you do it in slow motion? Can you do it fast? Can you do it and pretend to be a bear robot? So all of these like little changes to it requires just a little bit more concentration on the quality of that movement that we're talking about.

[00:17:52] Emma Wilking Ghelber: I just don't have a bag of tricks. Well, I do have a, you do an imaginary bag of tricks, but Yeah. I use myself as the bag of [00:18:00] tricks.

[00:18:05] Emma Wilking Ghelber: fun and they think they're playing.

[00:18:15] Emma Wilking Ghelber: And on top of that, they're getting the benefits of the relational interaction with mom and dad 'cause they're doing it with me. And I know for myself, especially after playing in a gym with kids all day, I always say playing instead of working.

[00:18:44] Leah Clionsky: Yeah. It's funny how those little tiny pieces of time can make so much difference. Mm-hmm. So I'm getting, I'm getting them to lift pillows, I'm getting them to log roll, and I'm getting them to be animals in transition.

[00:19:18] Emma Wilking Ghelber: Their crab walk might be forward and backward or sideways, or they might be a snake that's slithering on their side versus on their belly like you anticipated. If we're constantly then in those moments also correcting them. It becomes less fun.

[00:19:42] Leah Clionsky: So

[00:19:44] Leah Clionsky: It doesn't matter. That makes my life a lot easier. Yeah,

[00:19:53] Leah Clionsky: That would be amazing. Alright. I love these strategies. So we're going to do lifting cushions on the [00:20:00] couch or mm-hmm. Pillows. Mm-hmm. Or. I guess in my case I have some gigantic stuffed animals that some in-laws Yes.

[00:20:18] Emma Wilking Ghelber: this is like what you do in that between dinner and bedtime.

[00:20:26] Leah Clionsky: I think these strategies are going to be so useful to all of the parents I talk to all of the time, and I'm going to use them tonight and see what happens. Yes, please let me know. Yeah, I will tell you because Emma, I can text her. Yes, you can. So I can update her. But if you want to see Emma or her amazing clinicians at Foundations, what is the best way for our listeners to be in contact with you?

[00:20:54] Leah Clionsky: Yeah. The number and the website are going to be in the show notes. So they call, they schedule an appointment [00:21:00] and then they get in and then they understand what's going on with their child, what are their specific sensory needs? Yes. And they get a game plan for how to help.

[00:21:19] Leah Clionsky: That's amazing. I love collaborating. Often an OT and psychology will collaborate together and then we can really help kids.

[00:21:28] Emma Wilking Ghelber: I love doing that with you too, Leah.

[00:21:40] Emma Wilking Ghelber: It's

[00:21:52] Leah Clionsky: Hit follow. So you never miss an episode. Know a parent who's stuck in the endless cycle of conflicting advice. Send [00:22:00] this their way because we all deserve parenting strategies we can actually trust. And hey, if you have a minute, leave a review. Your support helps other parents find real expert back solutions instead of just another opinion online.

[00:22:35] Leah Clionsky: That's it for today. Thanks for listening, and I'll talk to you next time.