Episode #207: Seeking a way to satisfy a growing internal discontent, Nobuko Nakano turned to psychedelics and other drugs, and hard partying in her youth. It was hard for her to stop, even after taking her first vipassana meditation course in the tradition of S.N. Goenka. Finally, though, she felt she had come to a fork in the road, and made the commitment to spend an extended period of time sitting and serving courses at Dhamma Aloka. Becoming more grounded in the practice, she traveled on to India and stayed at the Dhamma Giri, where she also took an extended Pāḷi course.

Around that time, she and her partner enrolled in a 45-day vipassana course in Dhamma Sindhu in Gujarat. They had plans of returning to Australia and becoming more committed in their relationship, but on this course, something fundamental shifted in Nobuko; she realized that a relationship commitment in lay life was no longer for her.

She ended up in Burma, where she decided to ordain as a nun. The ceremony was surprisingly emotional for her, and even nine months into wearing robes, the pain of having let go of her relationship with her boyfriend was still so acute that one day she decided to disrobe and go back to him, until a senior nun talked her out of it.

She dedicated her time in robes to pariyatti study and intensive meditation practice, until several issues started bubbling over from under the surface. First was the disparity in how male and female monastics were treated in Burma. Yet even more egregious was the growing, anti-Muslim propaganda that was starting up (and eventually led to the Rohyinga crisis). She couldn’t reconcile how a community that had been so supportive and generous towards her, and was so committed to following the Buddha’s teachings, could become so hateful and paranoid. Nobuko realized that it was time for her to move on from Myanmar.

Nobuko had still not disrobed when she finally returned to Melbourne, and her mother confided to her that she wanted her to return to lay life. She said, “I hadn't lived in the world for nine years, so I gave it some thought, and I decided, ‘How about I give it a shot being back in the world, and try to be a good, wholesome, dhammic person in the lay life, a contributing member in society?’”