What if getting unstuck begins by uncovering the lies you believe about yourself and replacing them with what God says is true?

Episode Summary

We all get stuck. Sometimes it’s in insecurity, unforgiveness, comparison, fear, or old ways of thinking. We know we want greater freedom and confidence, but figuring out how to actually move forward can feel overwhelming.

Coach, speaker, and self-described “trajectory shifter” Emily Jamieson joins Willow for a powerful conversation about what keeps us stuck and how we can begin moving toward greater freedom, confidence, and wholeness.

For Emily, that work starts with identity. She shares how God revealed that even a seemingly positive label like “super mom” had become a weight she was trying to live up to. When she released that identity and asked Jesus, Who do You say that I am?, the phrase “trajectory shifter” came to mind—an identity that reflected how God had already been working through her life.

Emily explains that many of us are living from lies rooted in past experiences: I’m not enough. I’m alone. I’m unlovable. I’m helpless. I’m hopeless. Moving toward freedom requires being willing to recognize those beliefs, get curious about where they came from, and invite God to replace them with truth.

Willow and Emily also unpack some of the other things that keep us stuck, including unforgiveness, isolation, and losing our willingness to learn and grow. Emily shares why forgiveness doesn’t erase what happened but can release us from the power it continues to hold over us—and why community is essential to moving forward.

And Emily is quick to admit that being a coach and helping others move forward doesn’t mean she never gets stuck herself. She opens up about motherhood, miscarriage, family challenges, insecurity, feeling like she’s failing, and her continued need for counseling, mentors, friends, and God’s truth. Her honesty is a reminder that you can be strong and still feel weak. You can help others and still need help. You can be moving toward freedom and still be a work in progress.

If you’re feeling bound by insecurity, stuck in an old story, or simply longing for more freedom and confidence, this conversation will encourage you to identify what’s holding you back, invite God into it, and take your next step forward.

Meet Emily Jamieson

Emily Jamieson is a coach, speaker, mentor, wife, mom of four boys, and owner of Jamieson Coaching. She has spoken at several Collide conferences and teaches in Collide’s Women of Impact course. At the heart of Emily’s work is a desire to help people experience greater freedom and confidence and become more aligned with who God created them to be.

Emily calls herself a “trajectory shifter” because she loves learning, growing, and passing along what has transformed her so that others can move closer to truth, love, and freedom.

Key Takeaways

• When you feel stuck: Start by asking what you’re believing. The way we see ourselves can shape the direction of our lives.
• When you don’t feel confident: Remember that your identity isn’t what you do, what you have, or what other people say about you.
• When an old experience still has power over you: Consider whether forgiveness may be part of moving forward. Forgiveness doesn’t erase the memory, but it can release its hold on you.
• When you think you already know: Stay curious. Emily believes a willingness to keep learning is essential to continuing to grow.
• When you’re isolated: Invite people into your life. Community can cultivate hope, movement, learning, and the courage to dream again.
• When you feel like you should have it all together: Give yourself grace. Even the people helping others move forward still have places where they need help.
• When shame tells you to hide: Bring the right people into your story. Vulnerability creates opportunities for deeper connection and freedom.
• When change feels overwhelming: Focus on today. Ask what choice you can make right now that moves you toward life, hope, presence, and freedom.

How This Episode Will Encourage You

Getting unstuck doesn’t mean arriving at a place where you never struggle again.

Emily reminds us that freedom can look like recognizing a lie a little faster, inviting someone into what you’re carrying, choosing forgiveness, remaining curious, or simply asking God what He wants you to know today.

At the end of the conversation, Emily leads listeners through a listening prayer and invites us to ask Jesus two simple questions:

What do You want me to know?

Who do You say that I am?

You don’t have to change everything today. Start with what’s keeping you stuck, listen for what is true, and take your next step toward freedom and confidence.

Connect with Emily on her website

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Welcome to the Collide Podcast. We're a growing community of everyday gals colliding with Jesus in our mess, our pain, our joy, and our stories. We value showing up as we truly are.

So that's what you'll find here. Walls and masks being torn down so that we can allow Jesus to meet us where we truly are and hear about other women doing the same.

We can't wait to collide with.

I think about the Beatitudes, where it sort of get empty, this idea of, you know, empty yourself. Those who are empty will be filled.

And so we do need to let God essentially reveal and remove from us every way of thinking that sets itself up against the truth of God.

Hey there. So glad you hopped onto the Collide podcast. This is Willow Weston, the founder and director of Collide.

And today I am super excited to have Emily Jamison on. Emily has spoken at several of our Collide conferences and as well, she's a teacher out on our up and coming course called Women of Impact.

And she is a woman of impact.

This trajectory shifter will spend some time with us today, having a conversation that is sure to shift our trajectory, our thoughts, our hearts, and our paths. Emily is married to Marshall, and they have four boys. That's four. One, two, three, four.

Nothing brings the owner of Jameson Coaching more joy than seeing people walk in greater freedom and confidence. So today I am certain that we will walk into something great, greater as a result of this conversation.

So, Emily, I'm so glad that you hopped on today.

Thank you. I'm so glad to be here.

Yeah, you are a fan favorite at our conferences, and so it's funny that I'm just now having you on the podcast. I don't know what took us so long.

Well, you know, the world is weird right now, so yes, it is weird. Well, just to trust that this is the right.

Yeah, there you go. I like it. You call yourself a trajectory shifter?

Why?

That's such a good question. Years ago, I was doing a lot of work around identity.

I had had some mentors begin to share with me about their experience overseas, hearing from the voice of the Lord and really understanding identity. And while my first identity crisis was probably at 16, I tore my ACL and was suddenly no longer, you know, a soccer player and student.

Just had all sorts of things around that I think it took me so many years to really recognize where identity really comes from. For as many years as I believed in God. I know, identity, sure, and gosh, just a theme.

But there was a point at which this is probably seven years ago, there was a sense of recognizing that there are identities that we are naming ourselves with all the time, sort of narratives that we live by. And my identity is not what I do, what I have, or what other people say about me. And this is how the world typically identifies themselves.

We believe that our identity comes from what we do. You know, you walk up to someone at a party and you say, hey, you know, who are you? And they'll tell you what they do.

They'll tell you maybe what they have, how many kids they have, perhaps some roles, some titles, what other people call them. But at our heart of hearts, there is an identity that is woven into us in our mother's womb. And it's.

And it's carrying some facet of the character of God that he creates us in his image and their image. He created them, it says in Genesis.

And so I was going through this season of really wrestling with identity and what are the things that people call me that I don't love. And I'm thinking about. I remember this particular day sitting in my living room, and I was led through a listening prayer by.

By a mentor of mine, Jamie Winship. And. And it was actually just virtual. But. But he just asked this simple question. What is, what is a lie that you have come to believe about yourself?

And just ask Jesus, would you be the lie revealer? And so I just paused, and the first thing that came up in my mind and heart was this word super mom.

Which was funny because here I am, a mom of four boys, and there was no shortage of times that people had referred to me as that. And every time it was this kind of mix of flattery and deep discomfort.

This part of me that felt like, only knew, you know, just the, the fact that I am not a super mom.

Yes, I happen to have three kids hanging on me right now, and one in a stroller, and I'm carrying groceries and I'm, you know, and, and doing so many different things and coaching.

But at the same time, I knew the parts of me that were not a great mom, you know, that would fly off the handle in a heartbeat and scream at my children, who I love, but I was just tired and didn't have the self control that I wanted. And I mean, there were so many things that I felt like I didn't know what I was doing.

And, and so that title that had been this identity that was placed on me, I realized very quickly carried a lot of weight. Every time I heard, it just felt like, oh, I can't Measure up. And it was so interesting that of all the things, that's what came up in me.

And so there was just, in this sort of thought exercise, the invitation was to imagine that you were writing this identity down on a piece of paper and you would hand it to Jesus and what did he do with it? And right off the bat, he swallowed it. And I just like, gosh, that is just weird. And then I'm reminded of scripture, you know, I'm right.

I mean, I was like, usually when, when you don't expect it, it means it's not, you know, and so. But I'm reminded in Scripture it says that Jesus swallows up everything that brings death, right? He swallows death and he gives us life.

And I was like, oh my gosh, like it's scripturally sound. Of course the Lord would, would take this thing from me that feels like weight. And I said, jesus, who do you say that I am? What do you call me?

And this phrase pops up, trajectory shifter. And I was like, well, that sounds cool. I mean, I would never call myself that.

And then there was this invitation to think back throughout your life and recognize, you know, how this has always been at play. So when you're walking in the truest of your identity, this is just who you are. It's not something you have to try and be.

And I started to realize, gosh, I love to learn at every stage of my life. I just, I love to learn, I love to grow. I never want to remain stagnant, you know, and, and there's a sense of me. I love to teach others.

I can't wait to give away what has transformed me. I just, I can't help it.

And so when I'm with other people and I'm not trying to be witty or wise, I'm not trying to sort of self promote or anything, but I'm just being who God has made me be. I can't help but hand away what I've been given.

And, and the picture that I got was as I'm walking in my true identity and in, in unity with God and near to the spirit, aware of his voice, when I come together with others and I'm listening, that they will sort of glance off me, whether it's, you know, in a five minute conversation or, you know, months of coaching or a lifetime of friendship, they will glance off and move closer to the heart of truth, the heart of love, who is Jesus. And so that really defines.

I know when I'm, I'm walking in truth, when that's happening, When I'm growing and shifting and when other people are coming away, gosh, just more aligned with who they are called to be and more understanding of who God is. And this is regardless of whether or not they're a believer.

I mean, the reality is, is that, gosh, what we cannot see, taste and touch is more real than what we can. And, and people all across the spectrum are wrestling with spirituality, of how they explain what is unseen.

And I happen to believe that Jesus is the best explanation, the best answer, the greatest source of all of life. And, and so, yeah, this, this applies to anybody.

You know, the one thing that I know that I have in common with all of humanity is that the living God is in pursuit of all of them in great love and mercy.

I love that you had this moment with Jesus where he renamed you, you know, super mom. That felt like a weight, not a compliment to trajectory shifter.

And so often, and, and I think you have seen this in your own life and in other people's lives, and I know I have, that God sees in us what we often don't see in ourselves. And here you are now, you're living into being a trajectory shifter more and more every day. You have a coaching business.

You're speaking, you're truly coming alongside people younger than you, helping shift their traject trajectory. It's amazing that you have this moment with Jesus and now you can see in yourself what he already saw in you. I love that so much.

You call Jesus the Lie Revealer and, and that's really cool. It's often hard because I think sometimes we want a new name. We want Jesus to call us the Trajectory Shifter. We want Jesus to call us something new.

But we don't want to have to deal with the lies. And so often we have to start with those lies. When you call Jesus the Lie Revealer, what kind of work have you seen him do in women's lives?

What kind of lies does he often reveal for women that they're believing about themselves?

Oh my gosh, so many. He is so gracious and so kind. I think to your point, if we are filled with, I mean, just natural principles, right?

The principles of the natural world. If you're filled with one thing, you can't receive something else.

And so I think about the Beatitudes, where it's sort of get empty, this idea of, you know, empty yourself. Those who are empty will be filled.

And so we do need to let God essentially reveal and remove from us every way of thinking that sets itself up against the truth of God. Right. It says in second Timothy, when it's talking about that our enemy is not flesh and blood, but ways of thinking.

It's, you know, all that to say as I've worked with so many young women, young men, older women now. I mean, I'm kind of across the spectrum of age and gender and all the things. But.

But it's amazing when you sit with someone and you are in a place where you feel peaceful and safe, and you recognize that God is with you and for you, and he loves you, and you ask God, you know, what would you reveal to me what is not true? What have I come to believe about myself that is not true? And it is. It is everything from egregious lies. You know, you are not.

You are not loved, you are alone. I mean, typically, underlying most lies, you come down to this. I am alone. I am unlovable, and I am helpless, and I am hopeless. I mean, those are you.

You can really narrow them and down. And that is kind of the root of so many. But it comes in so many different ways and typically revealed by our experiences.

So I'll ask someone, like, when I'm doing coaching with someone, I'll just ask, you know, what is. What is the most kind of uncomfortable emotion coming up in you right now? And our emotions are so connected to our spirits.

I think the best voice that I know that sort of speaks at the intersection of sort of emotions and spirit and even mental health is Dr. Anita Phillips. She is so brilliant and wise, and she's really helped flesh some of this out for me.

But this idea is, as we access some of those uncomfortable emotions that we are feeling, those emotions are rooted in memories and experiences. And those experiences, at some point, sort of gave way to the enemy to name us.

And so, for example, when I was in high school and I was always afraid that I was not good enough, right? Even though here I go off to college. I went to Dartmouth College. I was in Ivy League school.

I'm starting as a freshman on a Division 1 team, ranked eighth in the nation, and I don't feel like I'm good enough. I'm afraid that if I'm really exposed, if people really knew who I was, that it wouldn't be impressive, it wouldn't be enough.

I was holding up this sort of essence of perfection. And I see this in so many, this feeling of, gosh, I'm not good enough. I have to be more perfect. I have to do more.

And at the same time, they always feel like they're not doing enough. And they're always doing more than they need to. I mean, it's just such a conundrum, particularly for women I've seen.

And so when you bring that before the Lord and you say God, where, you know, when. When was I named something else.

Typically it's rooted in an experience at some point in time where the enemy, by way of some experience, someone called you something you failed at, something the enemy was able to. To have you come to believe something about yourself that was not true.

And what is so beautiful is you can go to those very same moments because it says in scripture that God has never left you or forsaken you. And you can say, jesus, if you were there, where were you? Like, quite literally in the memory, just asking Jesus, where were you in that moment?

And if you were speaking and I could hear you, what would you be saying to me? And he quite literally can flip over lies trying to think of even.

I mean, there's so many, so many examples I could come up with, but I, I've seen so uniquely and just personally, God speak to people things that I would never know and they're surprised to hear. But I think those things of, you know, feeling helpless, feeling alone, and then allowing not just the scripture.

It's one thing to pray and read scripture over people.

It's another thing to hear from the rhema word himself, right when, when you think about, you know, Logos is Jesus in the flesh, and then you have the rhema word of God, which is the uttered word of God, and you have the graphi, which is the written word of God insp by that rhema word. And so as we read the scriptures, they can alight on our heart and cause our hearts to swell. And they, they are transformative.

The written word of God is transformative because it carries that spoken word of God.

And also when you have a moment when you tune in and you listen and that voice that's in you, that's not from you, speaks something to the depth of your heart and says, you are not alone. I have never left you. This is what I call you. And you see this all throughout Scripture.

Almost every account of Jesus encountering someone is a name change, is an identity shift. But just to witness that and people, I mean, there's. There's this incredible amount of freedom that comes and also a deepened intimacy with God.

Like you begin to trust him because he. He knows you better than you know yourself.

And, and he's so gracious to, like he says, remove everything that brings us death and replace that with life. It's the great exchange of the cross.

I, I love this work that you do so much. It, it reminds me back when I was not a Christian and I started going to a Christian counselor when I was 21 years old.

And she asked me to think of a really hard time from my childhood. And I remember having this distinct. I was kind of weirded out because the thing that I thought of wasn't what I thought I would have thought of.

I, I could think of all of these sort of traumatic nights of domestic violence and drunkenness, you know, crazy stuff. But I actually pictured myself sitting alone on this like plum tattered velvet old chair with my cat.

And I was probably sixth grade or something, and I felt deeply alone, which I was often left alone for long periods of time and. But I didn't think of these traumatic events. I thought of this feeling of being so alone and like I deserve to be alone.

And she asked me to invite, invite God to meet me on that chair. And I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it at the time. It took me probably six months to a year.

When I started opening myself up to Jesus, I was able to finally do it. But we talk a lot at collide about the idea that often you have to go backwards in order to go forward.

So you have to invite God back to those painful experiences, back to those places where you began to believe a lie. For me, it was, you deserve to be alone.

And if I could invite God back to that place and like you're talking about, allow him to speak into my life, life, I could finally move on from that lie and believe a new truth. And so I've experienced what you're talking about in powerful ways.

And Jesus is so faithful to show up in those moments, but it takes such bravery to, to go back to that chair, to go back to those places of pain. I mean, in like you, I do similar work where I speak places.

And I remember I was speaking at this retreat and this woman just, just, just kind of offhanded, not really thinking about it, called herself the daughter of a pedophile. And I, I was like, oh no, you are the daughter of the king.

And she didn't even realize she was identifying herself by a sick and twisted perverted thing her father had done that she never did, but she carried the weight of that. And so I love that you are doing this work with people. When you're doing work with people and you are help shift their trajectory.

What do you love about it when you see it happen for someone, oh,.

Gosh I think there's something. So when you see freedom come, when someone just is like, there's just this deep sense of relief.

I think that's, I hear often it's like, oh, I feel like I can take a breath. There's. Or weight falls off or they're given sort of new vision or able to dream again.

I just, I think you, you get to experience like this little sliver of the heart of God who is so for our freedom and once again us more than anything else to, to live in unity with, with him first and foremost, that we would live aware of the presence of this like all loving, all merciful all, just like beautiful, glorious God. And that, that would actually reconnect us with ourselves and with others. And there's something. Gosh, you asked that question.

I, I mean, I don't even. I'm not sure I have. I'm not sure I have words for that moment of just of recognition of like, oh, this is a soul becoming whole healed.

You know, Jesus says he's the healer of broken hearts. And I love like the Hebrew understanding of that word Lev. It, the Bible project does this great little video of it that really helped me.

That's, you know, pre Courtesian split before we had this mind and heart split. But it was, it was believed that the lev. The heart was the seat of will, emotion, intellect and spirit.

And so when Jesus says he's coming to heal our broken hearts, it's that we have been splintered. You know, our emotions and our spirit and our will, they are, I mean, every, our intellect, everything has been broken apart, you know, and we're.

And so when we become more in line with the truth of who God says that we are and the truth of our history and the grace that he has for us and for the people around us, our hearts are healed. You know, I, I wonder, I wonder about asking that same question as someone like a doctor, a surgeon, post surgery, when they see someone walk again.

Like when you get to repair someone in a physical way. I feel like this is repairing someone in an internal way that ultimately actually results in physical heal.

I mean, I've, I've, I've witnessed women as a result of doing internal healing in this way, quite literally have physical healing as a result. Like this one woman, she couldn't, she couldn't lift for years. Hadn't been able to lift her arm above her shoulder.

And we, and we did some work in community. It was with women that she loved very much. I was facilitating a retreat and we did some inner Healing and. And prayer.

And she confessed things, and the Lord spoke words over her, and she received it so beautifully. And right after, I just felt prompted. I was like, this might seem really strange, but do you have any pain in your body right now?

And she kind of looked at me funny, and she's like, well, my right shoulder, I've never been able to do. And she started to lift her arm. She goes, oh, my gosh, I've never been able to do this. And she was able to lift it higher than she had in years.

And those women continued to pray for her. And by the next morning, she could lift it all the way to the sky. And so you just see that we are so interconnected. We are embodied spirits and our.

Our emotions and our. I mean, I don't see that all the time, you know, but our emotions and our bodies and our spirits, I mean, they're all so interconnected.

And God for our healing and wholeness.

In every way, it has Jesus, you know, all over it. It reminds me of the collision in scripture where Jesus calls the woman who's been hunched over by a spirit for years. Yes.

And she's in the temple, and he calls her up and. And that ask of Jesus is really asking a lot of a woman who's been hunched over by a spirit to walk up and receive a healing.

And the bravery it takes takes to even take that first step or even raise your hand or even for that woman that you're talking about, to allow her community to listen to the lies and. And the struggles that she's been carrying. It takes so much courage, and yet Jesus honors it so much.

And it changes not only your spirit, but it does change so many other aspects of life, whether it's your body or your mindset, your perspective, your relationships, your. The way you believe in your future and your dreams for yourself.

I want to talk a bit about getting stuck, because when you get stuck, you're not moving. When your trajectory shifting, you're moving. There's motion, there's transformation, there's forward movement.

What do you see as the culprits in our lives of getting stuck and not being open to the move and transformation of God to shift us?

Yeah, I mean, as I think about that, I think, gosh, so several different things I think can get us stuck. One, I think being. Well, here, let me think, Lord, what do you want me to know? The first thing that comes to mind is unforgiveness.

And forgiveness is a. That could be a whole podcast in itself, because I think so often we have a miss or maybe a partial understanding of forgiveness, particularly in.

Particularly in Western Christianity. I hesitate to say, but. But this sense of it's not just a. It's okay or a verbal ascent to I forgive them or a response to God commands you to forgive.

But really.

But there's work there when you talk about bravery and work to actually release someone and something, an event to God and let him literally restore debts. You know, when you recognize that when something has been done against you or withheld from you, there is a debt laid against you.

And I think about forgiveness as like this accounting term that you quite literally have first recognize that this person or this thing that's been done to you, that that person is bankrupt to give you what you need.

And there's a transfer of literally ushering that person to the side of Jesus, handing them off, and then pinning that debt on Jesus and saying, how are you going to pay me back? Like, what do you want to give me in return? How do you want to restore this? And letting him be the one that actually restores all debts.

And so I think it's much more work than just a verbal ascent. And there is a great little book on forgiveness. I think it's by Randy Hogue. I'll send you some of these. Yeah, we'll put them in the show notes. But.

But I think unforgiveness can be one place where we let you know, history or events actually sort of take us captive in our lives, that they hold a lot of power over us. And forgiveness does never. It never erases a memory, but it relieves you of the power that something or someone has over you.

So I think unforgiveness is one. And do we do a lot of work around that? And as a result, I mean, a lot of just believing lies. I think a lack of curiosity, I think the.

The essence of being a disciple. When Jesus has follow me and they call him, you know, Rabboni Rabbi. He is a teacher in essence. And the disciples. That word is discipoly.

I think it is. And, and they're quite literally students. And so what is true of a student, they are learning.

And so when we come to a point where we have assumed we have learned all the things, and I know this.

And someone starts teaching or you're listening to a conversation and you have this internal sense of I already know these things, I think you stop growing. And I think in. In some ways, I mean, God is unsearchable. And so what does it look like for us to remain curious that we would have a grac.

That we would honor the dignity of all humanity.

That we would recognize that God's image is quite literally being carried by however many billion people there are in this world, whether or not they acknowledge him by name. And so I do think that curiosity is so essential for us to continue to grow.

And I think with that, then community, I think when we become isolated, when we become afraid, alone, my goodness, these last two years have caused so, so many people to become alone, isolated and very stuck because we need to in relationship with others, bouncing ideas off of one another and spurring each other on and calling out what is true and learning alongside one another, worshiping together and, and listening together and just dreaming together. I mean, it doesn't necessarily even all have to be.

I mean, just the very mere fact of dreaming, like being released to dream again about things can be very much movement forward. And so, so, so much this happens in community. It happens certainly, you know, alone with God.

There's, there's nowhere you are less alone than in the presence of the living God. And there's actually four of you there, right. Because there of him.

And that being said, I think about the community that we have and we're with other people that actually cultivates hope and movement and learning. And so it's so important that we have others to do this with.

I, I think it's so interesting that you name unforgiveness because it has the power to stick you for a long time, just keep you stuck for so long. You yourself have had a trajectory shift. You've moved from being coached in life to now coaching.

What kind of work did God have to do in you to move you from being coached to coaching?

Well, I will say I'm still coached. I have an incredible counselor who's 78 and she's phenomenal.

And I actually have a coach, a gal who's so wonderful and is kind of home life, spiritual business coach and other sort of more informal mentors. But I don't think I will ever stop wanting people that are older, wiser, further down the road. My favorite term is intergenerational friendship.

Like, I just love that because, I mean, I think we sometimes think it's, oh, the older passing something down.

But I know for me, as I'm even coaching and spending a lot of time with younger women particularly, it is so reciprocated, my goodness, like it is a mutual blessing to be able to be in friendship with people and offer, you know, that sense of my ceiling is your floor. Okay. So here I'm going to give you all my mistakes and all the things that I've done that are just wonky and I didn't know any better.

And my hope is that you would learn faster than I did. And that being said, I think I would trace back and recognize that. I mean, I think about.

My parents obviously are first sort of natural coaches in our home and training us up in things. And my mom gave me an incredible gift of curiosity and she just loves to learn. And my dad is one of the most patient and gracious people.

And there definitely was stuff in our home growing up. I mean, they'll tell you it was kind of crazy, a little wild, lots of yelling, little violence. It was intense.

But there's been so much work done there that I just adore my family. And they're just, gosh, we're just all functionally dysfunctional a little bit, you know, Aren't we all?

Aren't we all?

Right, Come on. I mean, my kids, I have so much more empathy for my own parents now. I'm like, man, they are, wow. All my children will.

I. I trust they will have counseling and coaching. And it's probably the things that I don't even know that I'm doing.

You know, I'm so guarding against particular, particular mistakes that there's gonna be things that are like, mom, you did this. I'm like, I didn't even know. So all that to say they will have their own journey. But I will say this. I have not been without a mentor since I was 15.

15. At 15 years old, I met a young life leader.

Her name was Susan Prudente and she was bright eyed and kind and newly married and just gave me space and time to process and learn. And that was the same time that I had torn my acl. And so it was just in the wake of that, I was on crutches when I met her at a football game.

And it was just God's beautiful timing that I was in a place of kind of insecurity, not knowing who I was because my identity was so rooted in this sport that I played that I was very good at and schooling and, um.

And so all of a sudden, you know, things had shifted and she entered into that space and really made Scripture accessible to me and the person of Jesus tangible to me. And I continued to meet with her even after college. I would go over to her house every Tuesday morning before I would go to work.

And she was by that point, you know, feeding her kiddos oatmeal at the table and listening to me so intently. And I looked at that now, and she modeled for me, what it looked like just to keep going.

And so I didn't start having babies and then decide, you know, oh, it's too busy now. It was like, no, I don't any other way than to just open up my life and my heart. And.

And she was so gracious to share so candidly with me about difficulties in marriage and a miscarriage that I then walked through years later. And I look back to that moment of her preparing my heart to even know what it might look like to walk through that. And.

Yeah, and so I think about just the gift of mentors who coached me all along the way. And from the time I was a freshman in high school, I started discipling girls that were one year younger than me.

I don't know who thought that was a good idea. I mean, so many things I should go back and be like, I'm so sorry I so misled you. But I think so.

That has always been sort of part of who I've been, is being guided and then also being a guide and just sort of passing that along. But I do think in the last.

I started my coaching business, like, 15 years ago, I was about to go back and get my master's in teaching when I found out quite swiftly that I was pregnant with my oldest. And that was, you know, not. Sometimes that's not in the plan. It wasn't necessarily the plan, but in God's grace, that year we had a little boy.

And in that same year, I. It brought birthed this coaching business. I decided it was actually not so much me as much as a mother of a son. I was.

Her daughter was on my lacrosse team that I was coaching at the time. And this mother came up to me and said, em, I know you can coach, and I know you're smart.

And my son is really struggling in school, and he's a freshman in high school, and he loves soccer. And I know you played soccer. Would you tutor him? And I thought about it and I thought, I think I could do that, you know, and. And so jumped in.

And that's what really it was someone else believing in me and seeing something in me that actually helped me to launch this business. And that young man actually graduated from business school at Oxford a handful of years ago. And it's doing quite well, which is really fun.

I don't take much credit there. It's just a fun story. But that being said, that started.

And I really started working with high school students, most the time, it was all academic coaching. So it's chemistry and essay writing, but it was always in the context of sort of mentorship.

The first five minutes was always, hey, how's that girlfriend? How are you doing with your mom? Like, what was the try? What was the tryout like? Because I started to recognize that if.

If you're not caring for the whole person, like, you can't learn if you're in trauma, if you're in a space where there. You're kind of jammed up emotionally, or there's not a. There's not a place to process what's going on in your life.

It's very difficult to learn algebra, let alone anything else. And so. So I started realizing, gosh, what does it look like to really do life coaching in the context of academics?

The academics are really just the fodder to give me access into these young people's lives to be able to encourage and speak life into them and identity. And. And then that has just grown and grown, and now I get to do that for people of all age, ages.

I still have some high school students, and I love doing math with them. I'm just a nerd. And I start, okay, here's the real grace of that. That was, what, 15 years ago? I start my master's tomorrow.

So that dream that was in me all those years ago, I actually drive today down to Portland and I start. Start a master's tomorrow. And I'm so. Just nerdy excited.

So excited. Emily. I want to be really real, because I think there's a lot of women who.

They look at someone like you and they think, oh, she owns a coaching business. She seems like a super mom. She's a trajectory shifter. She's investing in all these people that she's mentoring. She's speaking at ministries.

Do you have hard days? And. And when you do, who's your. Who's your like. Like, pep talk? Who gives you a rally? Who helps you to get back up and keep going on hard days?

What do you do?

Because I think there's a lot of women who have big dreams and want to do things that are amazing with their life, but they also have very real days where they're like, I don't feel like a coach today. I feel like someone who needs so much freaking advice. And I just wonder if that's a reality for you as well, that.

That in the midst of being someone who comes alongside people and helps and mentors and ministers to them, you're also someone who also needs other people to do that for.

For you, big time. My favorite question of the day. Yes. Oh, my gosh. I don't think I can cuss on this podcast, but I've.

I've had my butt kicked, particularly the last couple years. Oh, my gosh. But, yes, I. I'm so glad we got to this point, because honestly, I don't know how to lead.

Yes, I have strengths, but I lead so much out of weakness. The only way I have empathy and compassion for what people are going through is because I'm literally really quite.

I'm wrestling with it at the same time in terms of consistency and not losing it on my kids and not being snarky with my husband and not believing all the lies. I mean, on a daily basis, I'm probably asking that question, God, here's the lie I'm believing. Like, what do you say? Who do you say that I am?

Remind me. And. And just wrestling. I think it's just been over time learning how to sort of capture those thoughts a little bit faster than I used to.

But, oh, my gosh, so many hard days and so many days of just doubting. Like, I mean, even I think about last year, particularly the year I turned 40, was so brutal for me. I was barely coaching.

I had all my four boys home. I was homeschooling, and here I am, an academic coach, and I was.

I mean, I couldn't get them to sit at a table for two minutes, you know, and they're squirrely and hilarious and, you know, 6 to 14. So they all have different ideas of when they should learn and how they should learn, and they might need to poop in the middle of the reading.

And, you know, I mean, just there was. There was so much distraction. There was no rhythm. I barely met with a client, couldn't respond to an email.

I was like, I need a. I need an administrator or something and also a coach and a lot. And that's. I mean, I started doing a lot of counseling again because I was like, I just. I have so many questions.

I don't feel like I'm doing anything well. And I think much of my young momming was actually really marked by that lie of I would get to the end of the day and be like, I did.

I accomplished nothing today.

And just this constant sort of shadow of here I have all these dreams and these desires and ideas and ways that I want to, like, encourage and impact others. And I get to the end of my day, and I lost out of my kids, and does my husband even, like, Me, I don't know. And I'm.

I feel super insecure, and I'm not consistent about working out. I'm. I'm not consistent anything, it feels like. And I remember sitting with a mentor and asking her.

I was like, when will be the day that I'm consistent? And she kind of chuckled and looked at me, and she goes, when will be the day that you stop asking?

And not in, like, a snarky way at all, but just the fact that, like, life just throws so many curveballs. And there have been so many times where I'm like, oh, my gosh, here it is.

Like, I start the business and we do this thing, and then I have another baby, and then we start, you know? And, I mean, I just think about how many times I've done, like, start and stop, start and stop. I mean, the year that we.

We've had a lot of different iterations in ministry, in life, but we were in ministry. And my. I had three at that point in time and in the same season. I mean, just circumstances from every direction.

My husband walked through what looked like adrenal failure, was probably pretty deep depression, super burnt out in ministry. I ruptured my Achilles tendon and couldn't walk or drive for three. Three months, and then promptly had a miscarriage just after that. And.

And then our fourth little guy was born with all sorts of, like, genetic malformation. Day one, we were told he'd probably have uncontrollable seizures by the time he was one.

And all of that was within one year and just had so little space at the same time. My oldest was wrestling with, like, a lot of anger and outbursts. And so we started doing counseling with him.

And I was working through all sorts of forgiveness and things in my own life, and just. Just a hellish season. And yet what that season gave me in so many ways was this deep sense of compassion and empathy.

The fact that God comforted me and was my person. I mean, that's where I went, like, middle of the night, like, face on the floor, tears, like, you're the only one that knows.

Because as much as I would even try and share with other women or confess, like, oh, I totally lost on my kid today. Have you done this? And they're like, no, I've never yelled at my child. You know, not really.

But there's those places where you confess the really gnarly things of your life, and you can be met with crickets, and it's so vulnerable and terrifying. And. And so I think for me, coaching so much does come out of those seasons of.

And still, you know, wrestling and then learning wrestling and learning God, what do you want me to know? How do you, how do I combat this? How do I build rhythms in my life that are helpful? Who do I need in my life?

You know, and for example, even now, anytime I go and speak, I was speaking at a women's retreat last weekend and brought a really dear friend with me. I try and bring someone with me so that I have companion.

And during that weekend, you know, Saturday morning I'm doing identity coaching with a bunch of women and there's transformation they're experiencing the Lord. And that night I'm sitting on a couch with my dear friend.

And then a younger woman I've gotten to do premarital with, with she and her husband, she's a six month old baby. And I in my mind was like, oh my gosh, we're gonna get to pray with her and encourage her.

And instead these two began to ask me questions and so many things.

I mean, sobbing to the point where I could not see and realizing these lies that are still in me of this fear that I'm totally, totally failing my kids, that I'm not as present as I need to be. And I've already like the past mistakes that I've made have already marked them and, and just I didn't realize even how much was in me.

But it took these friends listening on my behalf, praying over me and we listened to the Lord together and God just reset my heart. And I, I mean it is a miracle, a modern day miracle. The last seven days. So since whatever last Monday, really coming home.

So eight days, nine days, I don't even know what do to date is, what day is it? I'm not sure this is why I need a coach, but really the last week and a half and my husband was gone this past weekend, so for four days he was gone.

And I have not yelled at my children. I. Some women are like, that's not my thing. You know, if you're getting judgy, that's okay because some of them, that's not their thing.

But for me, that was such a grace that I came in with this tenderness and a quiet spirit and a different vision for each of my kids of what they needed from me and like marching orders, quite literally From God, that 15 minutes before your kids get home from school, set your phone down, march around your living room, worship and ask me what I have for them for that day. And so I did that every day last week.

I mean, he's, he, he gives you a vision for things, but then he also backs it up and gives you gritty, practical, like granular wisdom for just the day. Like, I only have agency for today.

And so what am I going to choose today that's going to bring life and rhythm and hope and presence first to God and then to those who are around me?

Yeah, I mean, I could say so much about all the gnarly, but I just do not go, not come away from here thinking that I have this thing together, you know, I mean, I just, I know the one who does, you know, I know the one who knows people and knows all things. I know the one who reveals lies and I know the one who extends truth.

And my, my goal and hope when I'm coaching is not so much to offer wisdom that, I mean, I do want to offer wisdom, what God has given me. But more than anything, I want to facilitate an experience.

I want to facilitate a meeting with someone and the God who loves them and that they would personally experience his wisdom and truth and presence, his loving presence for them.

Hey there, friends.

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I love how honest you're being about it because I think women need to hear you can be both that you can be. You can be a trajectory shifter and you can still get stuck sometimes. You can be strong and you can still feel weak.

You can be successful and coach other people and still need coaching.

Like, I think that's a very real place to live in and to admit that that's where we're at and invite other people to come with us to, to the one who can help us with all Those things. So I love that you're being honest with. With us about it.

I had to ask because I think there's a lot of times where we can elevate someone else and think they look like they have it all together, when in actuality that's not the case. Grace at all, you know?

No. So it is such a. Yeah. No, I am such a work in progress. And. And I am grateful for God's grace in that and for other people's grace.

I think that's the lie underneath. There's moments where I was just with a woman last. A couple weeks ago, and she was sharing some things, and there was that little whisper.

You know, there's. There's the voice of God, which brings, you know, unity and life and truth and. And there's. There's the voice of the enemy that is.

That brings fear and guilt and shame. And it was that little whisper that was like, emily, you struggle with the same things she does. Who you. To sit here and speak into her life.

And I think the enemy wanted me to keep me from offering a. Me too, you know, because it's like, well, if I'm struggling with what she's struggling, how am I sitting in this chair?

And you're paying me to do coaching? Like, how is that for. And then to remember, like, no, this is where solidarity comes.

This is where I can sit here and say, gosh, like, I have been in that very same place. And literally last week, I was wrestling with that same question, who am I to do this thing? And. And it actually brought so much healing. Right.

And so I think there's such a lie that wants to keep us cover the lie of the garden, like, that you would just hide. Hide not only the glorious gifts. Some women are hiding their gifts.

They're hiding the beautiful things they have to offer the world because they're saying, who am I to do this? And then there are those moments where you're trying to hide just the gnarly parts, the failures, the mistakes, the insecurity, the fear.

But when we hide that, then we don't actually have deep vulnerability and community with others. And so I think we're meant to be right, fully bare and obviously with discretion. God is so gracious that not all people are privy to all things.

But I think in particular spaces, when you're released and invited by God, that we would actually have very particular spaces in our lives that we're willing, like you said, to be so courageous and so brave to bring our whole selves. And like you asked, there There are definitely a handful of women and my husband and a few men even, you know, that are.

That are aware that I'm real honest with, like, all this stuff, real time. And pretty much I'd say it from a stage, too, if it didn't implicate other people. Pretty much. It'll come. I just. Yeah. I don't know how to not.

I don't know. I was such a liar when I was younger. I. A deceptor, a deceiver. I mean, that's one of the other identities as a truth teller.

And for so long, that story. In college, I went over to college. I got caught for plagiarizing a paper because I didn't feel like mine was good enough.

So of course I had to copy someone else's. And I got suspended for nine months from college.

And that was the season that I experienced the voice of the Lord and his grace and his forgiveness like no other.

And a new identity, quite literally went back to school with an entirely different heart and mind and ironically got better grades when I was doing my own work. But. But it's so interesting to look back to realize, like, I was a dece. I did try to hide all those things. I was afraid.

And because of that me falling flat on my face, God gave me such a new sense of, like, don't hide. Like, you bring everything into the light because that is where freedom and life.

Well, Emily, you have so many things that you're doing. I can see that God is using you in amazing ways. I'm so glad you keep following Heart after his call and saying yes to him.

When you think about women listening who. Who are maybe feeling bound and insecure. And I picked those two words because they're almost the opposite of your passion.

Your passion is to see greater freedom and greater confidence happen inside of people. But when you think of women listening today who are like, man, I want more confidence. I want more freedom.

And they have no idea where to start to see any kind of shift in their confidence and their freedom. What's your best advice for them?

Can I just lead us in a quick listening prayer?

Love it.

Because this is what I would do. Yeah. Lord Jesus, I thank you so much for the ears that are tuning in right now, God, for every set of ears.

Behind that is a mind and a heart and a story that you know inside and out. And so, God, in this moment, as.

As we lean in and trust that God, you have always been with us, you say that you've never left us, you've never forgiven us. Forsaken us. And that every woman might know right now that you are near. And she just. She doesn't need to invite you in.

She just needs to awaken to your presence. And so I just want to invite you, as you're listening, to close your eyes, if that's helpful. Maybe stare out a window.

Whatever you need to do to focus and allow this imagination that God has given you, just lend your imagination to the spirit of God. He says he's given you the mind of Christ, which means that he can illuminate your imagination with things.

And so in your imagination, if you can, just. Just ask Jesus, where are you right now? God, will you give each woman a sense of your presence? Where are you in the room?

If you're outside, where are you? Are you near? Are you far? And if you can see him, can you move toward him?

And as you come near to Jesus, the risen God, the King of Kings, the counselor, the Lord of Lords, your friend, your Savior. Savior, as you draw near, just ask him, Jesus, what do you want me to know?

And whatever comes first and fast is typically the spirit of the living God. I'm with you. I'm for you. I love you, daughter. Jesus, is there anything you want us to know about you? Who do you say that you are?

And whatever comes, just receive that deeply. And know that there is an enemy that wants to steal, kill, and destroy.

And often, right when we hear something that's good and glorious from God, the oldest lie in the book is that the enemy says, did God really say that? And so do not be surprised if right now there's a little inkling in you a thought that says, was that I just made that up. That was just me.

And for a moment, would you just suspend disbelief?

Do not lend the enemy your imagination, but again, turn to living God and say, God, if that was you, would you tell me again, who do you say that I am? And whatever you hear, jot it down, share it with a friend, search it out in the Scriptures. Know that he loves you, he is with you, he is for you.

And every moment of every day, his voice is accessible to you. And so may you immerse yourself in the. In the story of Jesus as you. As you're in the word of God, that.

That would just help you to come to understand the tone and the texture of the voice of Jesus so that you can meet him in your. Your day. Today, God, we thank you.

I bless the hearers, Lord, that they would have peace and joy, that they would know your presence today, that there would be fruit of the spirit that would come up and out of them that they're even surprised about. But God more than anything else. Would you affirm that you are near? We pray that in Jesus name, Amen.

Emily, thank you so much for hopping on the podcast today. It was so great to chat with you and pray with you for people who want to connect with you. How can they do so?

Yeah, I have a website, it's EmilyJamieson.com and I'm on Instagram. Emily K. Jamieson that is more kind of just life and you know, micro blogging little words and things like that.

And soon, and very soon there will be more things coming.

I'm brainstorming a little podcast that's a listening prayer experience and just other resources to really help people grow in discernment and listening and being more comfortable even even with hearing from the voice of God and knowing lies from truth that they might be free.

I love that. I can't wait for it. It's awesome.

Thank you for hanging out and for those of you listening, so glad you hopped on today and my hope for you is that you would continue to collide with the trajectory shifter that you would allow him to reveal lies to you that you're believing about yourself and allow him to replace those with new beautiful names because you are so very loved. Keep colliding and we'll catch you next week.

Thanks for tuning in to keep up with us. You can find us on Instagram at We Collide on Facebook as Collide Women.

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