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Still Loving My Selfie, Love Thy Selfie Remastered | LAYC32
Episode 3211th August 2021 • Seasoned Women Serious Business • Isabel Alexander
00:00:00 00:14:10

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I am travelling for a month, visiting family, dear friends and colleagues in Canada, and spending some reflection time with Me, Myself and I.

I love road trips, and as a safe driver should, I frequently glance in the rearview mirror.

My attention doesn't linger there; just brief seconds to make be aware of what is behind me. But, at the same time, I see me and I have the opportunity to check in with me also.

Six months ago, I recorded the episode "Love Thy Selfie". Today, on the road, I look back as a reminder to love me first, so that I can love others as my best self.

Safe travels all!

Transcripts

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Will you be my Valentine?

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It's February, traditionally the month that we think about hearts

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and flowers, and candy, and dates, and a little romance...

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Spending a little more time loving on the people that are important in our lives.

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I think that we should be loving on ourselves every month.

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That's why one of my mottos is Love Thy Selfie.

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Just as a reminder...

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Particularly for many women...

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Certainly I earned that badge...

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I am often much more critical of myself than anybody else could ever be.

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I'm not good enough.

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I'm not young enough.

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I'm not slim enough.

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I'm not, not, not,

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Always this drive to...

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Be better THAN...

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Instead of going...

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This is ME...

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And this is wonderful.

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I Do Love My Selfie.

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It's such an awkward thing at first to say...

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To myself...

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I was raised with that sort of of attitude of...

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Don't be vain.

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Don't be looking for compliments..

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Always be very humble and meek.

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And you know, if you think too much of yourself, well you're really just...

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Heading for trouble.

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That you should always only be thinking about other people.

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And as a woman...

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You should put yourself last.

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you should always, kind of be...

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Demure, or at least not...

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Practicing any form of self admiration or self appreciation.

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Unfortunately, that's changing a lot.

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But of course, the other side of the coin can be...

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That now, today, with our social environment...

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Where we are being exposed to filtered and altered photographs

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of everybody's A life...

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But it becomes even more of a challenge to go...

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Oh my...

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This is me...

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Without my makeup, on a bad hair day, on a day when I'm feeling

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less than the Superwoman...

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That I want to be, or that I need to be...

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For myself, and for others.

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In a conversation with a friend of mine, not long ago.

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She's said something that's just stuck with me...

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We were talking about...

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At our age...

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We're both in our sixties plus...

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How to feel desirable and sexy and passionate...

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The disappointment in changing, and evolving relationships over time.

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Where some of that passion is lost, or we just don't feel sexy

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enough to deserve that passion.

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Her statement was...

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If I don't turn me on?...

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Who can?!!

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That struck a chord with me, and made me think more about that...

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That...

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Yes, as a woman, I'm 66 years old now.

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I don't know where you are in this spectrum of evolution as a woman...

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But...

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Can you look at yourself?...

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and say...

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Hey babe, you turn me on.

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And when you do...

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Really, really say that with conviction.

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How does that change your attitude?...

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Your feeling, your posture, your smile, your sparkle, your tingle

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in all those great feminine places?

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Has society pegged us wrong?

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Do we stop being romantic or sexy or just wanting physical affection when,

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after menopause, or in our sixties.

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I'm a grandmother who's a live, warm blooded woman.

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I want not only to be admired for who I am authentically, but to

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admire myself, for who I truly am.

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When I wonder about how you feel about this, and...

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What are the ways that we can appreciate ourselves?

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To continue to build ourselves up so that we feel great...

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And we set examples for people around us.

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Know the old adage...

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of mama's not happy, nobody's happy?

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I think that applies to how we feel.

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Absolutely.

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It does apply to how we feel about ourselves and how that radiates

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around us and affects other people.

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There's the energy, the vibes that are flowing...

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When you do feel positive about yourself.

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As a woman aging through childbearing years and menopause, and divorce

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and business challenges, and growth.

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The loss of loved ones, dear friends and parents...

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It isn't always sunshine and lollipops..Is it?...

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But...

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Then you add on to that...

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As we get a little older...

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And hair is growing where we don't want it to...

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And isn't growing, we wish it would more.

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Our bodies letting us down, changing and morphing in shape.

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Hormones are coming and going.

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Staying up late means staying up past 9:00 PM, and our energy levels can be lower,

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and our habits, and our willpower...

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They have different priorities.

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Let's just say that.

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Does that mean...

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That we aren't any less vibrant?...

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and desirable?...

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To ourselves, and for ourselves?

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I think not.

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It's a matter of changing our perspective and realizing that the societal norms

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of the curly blue haired grandma...

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The cardigan sweater and the sensible shoes are not relevant anymore.

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Unless we choose that is who we are, and that's what we love about ourselves.

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Instead...

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We have options.

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We're evolutionary women...

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We can rewrite those standards.

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And in fact, we're writing what I call Her-story.

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What does it mean now, in 2021 and beyond...

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To be a woman?

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In the 3rd stage of her life?

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What do you do?...

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How do you show up?...

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In those 50, 40, 30, 20, more years that you will live vibrantly and energetic?

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What are the ways that you identify with this new you?...

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This next you...

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How do you leverage that to influence your life, your own autonomy and satisfaction.

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How do you influence others, and be a mentor or role

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model, for those around you?

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With all of that lifetime of accumulated tacit knowledge, feminine wisdom,

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experience, strengths and skills.

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What will you do?...

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To help others, as you Lift As You Climb, and have an impact that is significant...

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and is the legacy that you create!

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Very interested to hear what your thoughts are about...

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Do you turn yourself on?

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If you don't...

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