Show notes

Transformation Through Suffering: Embracing Spiritual Rebirth

In this episode of the psychotherapy series, part three delves into the concept of transformation through suffering. Josh explores the idea that true transformation requires a change in thinking, feeling, and actions, but also emphasizes the spiritual and mysterious nature of change, likened to a 'spiritual rebirth' that originates from a divine source beyond the material world. Despite the efficacy of evidence-based treatment modalities in therapy, this episode underscores the indispensable role of spiritual awakening and relational processes in healing. It argues against solely focusing on ceasing specific behaviors or quieting suffering, advocating instead for drawing closer to Christ in times of suffering to see the world and oneself anew. The episode includes powerful quotes from St. John of the Cross as well as Richard Rohr about the radical mind shift ('metanoia') necessary for personal and social transformation, framing suffering not as an obstacle but as a pathway to deep spiritual growth and connection. The episode concludes with reflective questions to encourage listeners to surrender to God's control and embrace suffering as part of their transformation journey.

00:00 Introduction to Transformation through Suffering

00:22 The Mysterious Nature of Transformation

01:30 The Role of Love in Transformation

02:03 Suffering as a Path to Transformation

02:43 Inspirational Quotes on Transformation

03:14 Understanding Metanoia: A Fundamental Transformation

05:21 Reflection Questions for Personal Transformation

05:43 Conclusion: Embracing Suffering for Transformation

About Josh Kalsbeek, LMFT

• As a Psychoherapist Josh helps people overcome their greatest struggles.

•Founder and CEO of Great Oaks Collective, and it's flagship program Overcome, a 10-Week virtual Intensive Outpatient Program for Christian couples experiencing sexual betrayal and addiction. www.greatoakscollective.com. 

• Sign up to receive my weekly email newsletter, Words of Wisdom. ​

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Links

St. John of the Cross, The Dark Night, in The Collected Works of St. John of the Cross

Richard Rohr, The Wisdom Pattern

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Words of wisdom 1 24 On transformation through

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suffering psychotherapy series.

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Part three.

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Last week we talked about how if you

want transformation, you must change your

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thinking, your feelings, and your actions.

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Yet this doesn't go far enough in

describing the process of change.

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Transformation is a mysterious thing.

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Jesus said it was like being born again,

in that by definition it is mysterious.

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A spiritual rebirth comes from above.

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There is a kind of transformation

that only comes from God.

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If we think we can fashion our own

radical transformation, we are sorely

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mistaken either through pride or

by being deceived and believing that

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the material world is all there is.

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Yes, there are evidence-based

treatment modalities.

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There are techniques, approaches and ways

of being that we see consistently work

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in therapy as we seek to help clients

grow and heal, and yet there is a certain

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element of mystery in the healing process.

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Through the years of doing

psychotherapy, I've learned to rely

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less on a packaged process and more

on a relational and spiritual process.

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By relational, I mean that in

therapy I seek to love people

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well and be in the moment.

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Love comes before transformation.

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Transformation, moves at the speed

of applying the truth to our lives

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as we live connected to others.

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When people come into therapy, they

naturally come in suffering, wanting to

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stop doing certain things, and seeking

to learn to overcome specific struggles.

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As counterintuitive as it

sounds, don't focus merely on

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stopping a certain behavior.

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Don't even focus too much

on quieting your suffering.

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It is in the midst of experiencing

suffering that you can draw close

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to Christ and depend on him and see

yourself and the world in a new way.

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My prayer for you in therapy is

that you would have your soul

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and spirit shaken to the core.

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You must experience a spiritual awakening.

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I hope you'll go on a journey

and experience something that is

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very difficult to put into words.

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I hope the fundamental way you

experience God, how you experience

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yourself, and how you experience a

soulful connection with others will grow.

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Quotes.

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" For this immense love that

Christ, the Word, has cannot

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long endure the sufferings of

his beloved without responding.

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God affirms this through.

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Jeremiah.

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I have remembered you pitying

your youth and tenderness when you

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followed me through the desert."

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By St.

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John of the Cross in the Dark Knight.

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In the book, the Collected Works of St.

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John of the Cross.

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"The Lincolns of this world are people

who have experienced what the New

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Testament writers termed metanoia.

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The word literally means a turnaround.

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It is a fundamental transformation

of mind normally brought about by

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personal suffering, great awareness,

or Damascus road experiences.

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This reveals an utterly

new imaginal world.

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Until we imagine our world differently,

intellect and will of themselves provide

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only temporary and often weak change.

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Metanoia.

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an utter turnaround involves

seeing with a new mind and it's

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seemingly necessary to transform us

personally and to help us transform

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social structures and institutions.

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In other words, we are first of all

assumed to be on a course of ego

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narcissism and self-interest with

a what's in it for me attitude.

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Other disciplines might speak of

insight, eureka moments, flow or peak

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experiences, but metanoia is always

known to be a grace from nowhere.

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The recipients always know for sure

that it is an utterly unearned gift.

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If they don't, they're destroyed

by their own hubris or pride.

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The biblical tradition would say that

this turnaround is entirely dependent

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upon an experience of The Absolute.

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Afterward, we know at least

three things at a deep level.

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God is good, the world

is good, and I am good.

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That is all we need in order to begin.

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We then have an utterly grounded

imaginal consciousness and fear

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has been foundationally overcome.

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Our psyche is no longer based

in the small self, but in the

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Great Self, the Christ Self."

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By Richard Rohr in his

book, the Wisdom Pattern

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Questions.

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What difficulty, struggle, or

suffering can you accept today?

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What are you trying to control?

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Will you surrender what is

out of your control to God?

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Use these questions as journal prompts

and for your prayers this week.

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End note.

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Instead of running from suffering,

accept it, and surrender to God in his

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loving care, then take courageous action.

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Live wisely.

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Josh.