Susan and her siblings supported their parents as they aged. When the time came to access formal support, Susan discovered how confusing the process was and how long it took to get services.
Susan discusses what she noticed between the two different assessment services and the outcomes. When it was time to sign up with a package provider, Susan researched the management option that suited her best.
She talks about her journey and what she learned along the way. She realised that in not understanding the system, her parents waited longer for help.
In this episode:
Resources Mentioned:
Related Episodes:
Connect with Coral Wilkinson:
More about Your Aged Care Compass podcast:
Are you supporting an older loved one at home and ready to give up because it’s just too hard? Your Aged Care Compass is aimed at anyone who is caring for an older loved one who still lives at home and is wondering what support is available to them.
We're Coral and Michelle, the sisters behind our business, See Me Aged Care Navigators.
Coral is a registered nurse with over 30 years’ experience in both health and aged care. A former assessor with the aged care assessment team, an advocate and author, there’s not much Coral doesn’t know about Australia’s aged care system.
Michelle is a former pharmacist with over 30 years in the public health and private sectors of pharmacy. Michelle is now client care manager for our business.
Our story started as one of supporting our parents to remain in their own home, to be as independent as possible and remain connected to their community. We reached a point however, of needing extra support and we achieved this because we know Australia’s aged care system so well, we knew what programs could assist us and our parents.
This podcast, Your Aged Care Compass, brings together not only our personal experience in supporting our own ageing parents but also our vast professional experience in supporting other families to keep their loved ones at home.
We will help you makes sense of Australia’s aged care system, from your first contact with My Aged Care through to the different funding streams and assessment workforces, management options for home care packages and extra funding that people might be eligible for.
There's so much more. Topics relating to dementia and legal and financial considerations will be covered, as well as real life stories of where it went wrong for people and how we guided them to get it right.
Your Aged Care Compass will guide you clearly and compassionately to the right support at the right time for your ageing parents and loved ones.
Like what you hear? Please leave us a Rating and Review. We’d love you to share this podcast with any friends or family who have older loved ones.
Welcome back to Your Aged Care Compass podcast.
2
:Taking a little deviation from
our foundational aged care topics,
3
:we welcome guest speaker Susan
Day, who has lived experience of
4
:caring for her elderly parents.
5
:Susan will be chatting with me about
what she did and how she did it and
6
:when to support her parents into and
through our aged care system to get
7
:them the help they needed to remain
at home for as long as possible.
8
:So Susan is 57 and she's a librarian.
9
:She lives in Brisbane with her partner
and her daughter and her toy Cavoodle.
10
:She has two brothers and a sister.
11
:When Susan first sought help for her
parents, they were still both alive.
12
:Mum has since passed and they were
living independently on the Gold Coast.
13
:Dad has moved into residential
aged care since then.
14
:Susan, welcome.
15
:It's my pleasure to have
you here with me today.
16
:Susan: Thank you.
17
:Coral: You supported your parents
to get into and move through our
18
:very complex aged care system.
19
:Just going back to the beginning,
when you were aware that they might
20
:need some help at home, what were
the signs that were evident to
21
:you that that might be the case?
22
:Susan: Well, mom had macular
degeneration, which was getting worse.
23
:So she had always been the
one in the relationship.
24
:She was the one that did the cooking
and the shopping and looked after
25
:the medication administration
for both her and my dad.
26
:And not being able to see, it just
got to the point where she couldn't
27
:do those things properly anymore.
28
:And because my dad was showing signs
of early dementia he was not really
29
:able to step in and pick up the slack.
30
:So it was quite clear that things weren't
sustainable and we couldn't carry on.
31
:With them just managing on their own.
32
:So, we were all, all of us, children
were stepping in to help a whole
33
:lot more than had been before.
34
:Coral: That's what happens, doesn't it?
35
:Everybody rallies and it's,
great while it's working.
36
:But as you said, it's not sustainable.
37
:And I know that you live about an
hour away from where mom and dad
38
:were so impossible to commute that,
39
:Susan: Yep.
40
:Coral: Two, three times a week.
41
:Susan: I was lucky I had my two
brothers lived locally, I lived an
42
:hour away and my sister is interstate.
43
:So, she was making trips
regularly, but, she'd make a trip
44
:and stay for about five days.
45
:But, it's hard to do that when you
working as well and you have to
46
:negotiate leave and all of that.
47
:Coral: difficult.
48
:So did you action the referral
to My Aged Care or did someone
49
:do that on behalf of your parents
50
:like a GP?
51
:Someone
52
:Susan: it's a bit of a blur.
53
:When you talk about my age, I remember
probably in:
54
:were still sort of doing all right.
55
:But dad had a heart attack and
being sent back home from hospital.
56
:And we were just thinking, no, there
must be some help that we can get them.
57
:And I think that's where, when we
first got in touch with MyHKN, I think
58
:it was my sister started the process.
59
:It's a bit of a blur.
60
:I don't really remember.
61
:All I know is that, it was years
later that we actually got them what
62
:I felt was the help that they needed.
63
:And I regretted not having gotten
that help for them much sooner.
64
:The initial the early stages
involved getting some, what I
65
:now know and understand to have
been the, it was a, they were
66
:assessed by the Regional Assessment
67
:Service.
68
:And,
69
:they got.
70
:Just services, so Commonwealth
home support package thing.
71
:And at the time it was just all so
confusing because I remember, taking a
72
:day off work to go to the Gold Coast to
be with them while the successor came.
73
:She sat there with her laptop.
74
:It took ages.
75
:She asked me, So many questions and
she typed away and my mom and dad
76
:were like looking at each other, like
they found this a bit disconcerting.
77
:He's a stranger coming to home,
asking all these questions and typing
78
:away and barely looking at them.
79
:And then as a result of that, remember
what they call referral codes for a
80
:bunch of things and it sounded really
promising, but then you go and try
81
:and follow up and actually get the
services that those referral codes.
82
:Supposedly and tackle you to, and
there aren't actually any providers
83
:or the providers in your area for
that particular service site capacity.
84
:So it was a very, frustrating.
85
:I think the basically what they
got out of that was a fortnightly
86
:cleaner for an hour and then transport
services, which they never used
87
:because my mom struggled to get.
88
:in and out of the car
that, it was like a van.
89
:, and she needed transport for
things like to a hospital
90
:appointment, to the eye clinic for
her eye injection kind of thing.
91
:And, It's a long day.
92
:You don't know how long you're going
to be waiting there for before it.
93
:It just didn't work for them.
94
:So it was a lot of time
and effort for very little,
95
:result.
96
:Coral: regrettably, what
you've just described with mum
97
:or mum and dad is not unusual
98
:Situation at that, at that entry level
what you said, taking, from:
99
:taking some years to kind of get to
the next level and get it sorted is
100
:also not an unfamiliar thing that
101
:we hear.
102
:So after , you made that
contact with My Aged Care.
103
:Regional assessment service assessor
came to the home and did the assessment.
104
:You've just described how that was,
and it, and it is confronting, when a
105
:stranger comes into your home for the
first time, and they're asking you a
106
:gazillion questions and tapping away.
107
:It's, it's not really personal.
108
:Can be a little bit unsettling
for older people as well.
109
:And they're wondering what's
going on and what's the outcome
110
:and what does this mean?
111
:Then you went eventually when
you've got mom and dad to
112
:the age care assessment team.
113
:How did that assessment differ?
114
:Did they also come to the home
or was that done over the phone?
115
:Susan: so I think, how we eventually got
to be assessed by the ACA team was Dad had
116
:been hospitalized for a heart attack and
he was going go home, and the gp, I think
117
:wrote a referral to the ACA team asking
for them to be assessed, saying that.
118
:Dad, needed care at home and mom wasn't
able to provide that care because she
119
:couldn't see and she needed care herself.
120
:So I think that's how we got the
ACAT team to come out and assess them.
121
:Coral: Being teams of clinicians, Susan,
did you notice that the assessment
122
:that they did perhaps focused a
little more on their health conditions
123
:or their functional limitations?
124
:Susan: yes, very, very
much so, definitely.
125
:And I just remember, At the end
of that, I was almost in tears.
126
:I was so grateful assessor for like, I
think she, mom and dad both felt listened
127
:to unlike previous assessment they felt
like, this lady was asking relevant
128
:questions and listening to their answers.
129
:It was, it was a bit of
a different experience.
130
:Coral: They were both approved
for home care packages.
131
:I At that point, weren't they?
132
:And was it a level
three that they were both?
133
:Susan: Dad was approved for a level three.
134
:At that point, we didn't have
a dementia diagnosis on him.
135
:And physically, he was a
lot better off than Mom.
136
:Mom was approved for a level 4 package
137
:Coral: Straight to the highest level.
138
:Just on that note I'm just thinking
when, when the level three became
139
:inadequate for dad's needs and his
needs were higher than that, going
140
:back and then getting a support plan
review, getting the ACAT to review
141
:that original approval for the level
142
:three.
143
:Was that fairly straightforward
or did that take quite some time
144
:to organize?
145
:Yeah.
146
:Susan: We, didn't do that.
147
:We never got him reassessed
after the dementia diagnosis.
148
:We did apply for the supplement.
149
:Coral: Oh, the Dementia and
150
:Cognition Supplement, which gives, an
additional few thousand dollars of funding
151
:Susan: Yes.
152
:Coral: year.
153
:Yep.
154
:Susan: But I think he
never actually received it.
155
:Like he's subsequently went into
residential aged care in November.
156
:that only applies to
people who are receiving
157
:Coral: The
158
:Susan: packages, right?
159
:Yeah.
160
:So, think it was just, we
left it a bit too late and so
161
:we didn't actually see that.
162
:Coral: So when a person is, they get
their approval from the ACAT for the
163
:home care package and then they're
waiting for that package to be assigned,
164
:that's when people generally start
researching and looking into who they're
165
:going to choose as their provider.
166
:How did you go about that?
167
:I guess the choices, people are very,
I guess people are a lot more familiar
168
:now with self management because there's
a lot of discussion about that across
169
:social media and and it's a wonderful
model, but it's not for everybody.
170
:The alternative typically is
fully managed where the provider.
171
:We'll arrange everything for you.
172
:So fully managed you've got the
coordinator who's coordinating
173
:all the services and support.
174
:And then if you opt for self managed, then
you have to do the legwork and source
175
:your care workers and your clinicians.
176
:So in making that kind of choice,
which model you were going to go
177
:with and then choosing a provider,
how did you approach that?
178
:Susan: I did a lot of Googling.
179
:I joined Facebook groups.
180
:I lurked in Facebook groups, just sort of
reading all the posts and getting sort of
181
:an awareness of, of the issues and so on.
182
:think that's it.
183
:I realized, like, it just seemed
to me that self managed would be a
184
:better option, giving, my mum and
dad a bit more, sort of, choice
185
:Like, just to stay in their own,
affairs and how their days were.
186
:We're going to go and so on and who,
who was going to come and give them the
187
:services that they wanted and so on.
188
:So yeah, it seemed like just, a better
option to me, the idea of self management.
189
:And I just remember, look,
it really is, it is a blur.
190
:And I've been trying to
remember how things unfolded.
191
:But I just I think I've came
across your website somehow.
192
:not sure exactly how,
how I came across you.
193
:And you were offering a
webinar that I signed up for.
194
:I was really impressed.
195
:Just with, it was just a relief
to hear someone in the field.
196
:With experience, like an authoritative
source of information, then, you learn
197
:a lot in Facebook groups, but you also
get a lot of misinformation in Facebook,
198
:because this is just the general public,
all chipping in and having their say, so
199
:it was hard to know, well, who's right,
who's wrong, who do I believe, so it was
200
:just a relief to sort of know that, okay,
This lady knows what she's talking about.
201
:And it's a lot easier to just have one
authoritative source to consult than
202
:to be trying to piece things together
from a zillion different sources.
203
:then I got a copy of your
book, which was also great.
204
:Same thing, one source, I could read
it, I could underline things, I could,
205
:turn the pages over and bookmark things
206
:and it just made a huge difference.
207
:Things started to become clearer to me.
208
:I realized then that the reason mom
and dad got so little the first time
209
:was that wasn't an ACAT assessment.
210
:That wasn't an ACAT assessment, and at the
time I had no idea that, My aged care is,
211
:it's a call center, It's
212
:not a service, it's not a like,
Oh, what do your parents need?
213
:Coral: Exactly.
214
:Susan: them help,
215
:Coral: I'm so glad you said that.
216
:I'm so glad you said that
because that's a distinction.
217
:I go on about.
218
:All the time.
219
:My Aged Care is purely a call
center or a contact center.
220
:They do not assess people.
221
:They determine, based on the information
that you give them, they determine
222
:where that referral is going to go.
223
:And if you are unprepared, if you don't go
on the front foot with all the information
224
:you need to get across, You will end up,
your parents will end up at entry level.
225
:And that might be appropriate
for some people, but it's
226
:inappropriate for too many people who
227
:need to go
228
:straight,
229
:To the ACAT.
230
:So I'm really glad that
you brought that up.
231
:Susan: Yep.
232
:Yeah.
233
:So, it was just a real eye
opener, reading the book.
234
:And yeah, so I narrowed it down.
235
:I decided, yes, we want to go
with a self managed provider.
236
:I narrowed it down and yeah,
finally I'd heard good things
237
:about one provider in particular.
238
:And I was lucky enough to be
able to get in with them.
239
:And yeah, that was
240
:the beginning.
241
:I just wish it had
happened a whole lot sooner
242
:than when it did.
243
:Yeah.
244
:Coral: Were you challenged to find
carers or support workers, or, can
245
:I just add something to that because
you chose self management and you
246
:have to go and source everyone,
247
:people, clinicians, carers, whatever
it is that your parents need, what
248
:did you find challenging about sourcing
your own people to support mum and dad?
249
:Susan: Well, there are so many.
250
:Not sure what you call them
platforms or apps or whatever out
251
:there where you can scroll through
people offering different services.
252
:Oh, I can't remember how many
of these I signed up for.
253
:And it's, I just couldn't
believe the amount of time.
254
:So at the time I was not working.
255
:My contract had ended sort
of in the COVID pandemic and
256
:hadn't been renewed as a result.
257
:So I wasn't working and I don't
think I don't think I could have
258
:managed this if I had been working.
259
:But that was another reason
why why I opted for the self
260
:management because I had the time.
261
:But yeah, I, after Registering
for, I don't know how many of those
262
:different platforms and searching
and trying to find people eventually
263
:just opted for one of them.
264
:And very time consuming, just
even putting together an ad.
265
:For workers to respond to, doing it
carefully so that they know what you
266
:want so that you only get kind of
person responding who wants to do that.
267
:And then, even so you'd get
responses from so many people
268
:who were just like so unsuitable.
269
:So that was really, really
hard and but once, we found.
270
:One person that was, it was brilliant.
271
:Like she, once we found the
right person, it was brilliant.
272
:My fear then was, what if
anything happens to her?
273
:What if something happens to her?
274
:And so then I went on another big
effort to, to find someone else.
275
:Just so that I could have more than
one support worker like, the one
276
:wanted to take leave or something
came up in her own family or whatever.
277
:So, that was a huge relief.
278
:And also just the initial work.
279
:So, A lot of what mom and dad needed was
equipment, like, they needed beds that
280
:could be raised and moved and so on.
281
:seat, like a swivel seat that
mom could get up from easily
282
:recliners and things like that.
283
:So they were one off things.
284
:Coral: And did you have to
find an occupational therapist
285
:to do that assessment that
286
:would satisfy the provider or?
287
:Susan: I, I was fortunate in that the
provider that we chose did not insist.
288
:That we get an occupational
therapist report.
289
:I was very grateful for this
because I was very much away from
290
:things I'd read in Facebook groups.
291
:That was often the case.
292
:Anything that you wanted had to come
with an occupational therapist's report.
293
:And it's, things like that.
294
:They just sound it doesn't sound like
it, but every single thing requires time,
295
:Coral: It does.
296
:Susan: time.
297
:And, Anytime someone had to go and be
mum, mum and dad, I usually took the
298
:time off work to be there at the same
time, just so that I could make sure that
299
:everything was in order, and that they
were getting the right story, and so on.
300
:So, yes I was fortunate enough
301
:Coral: I'm really glad that you raised
about the time that it takes, because
302
:one thing that bothers me and my, I
support my mom to self manage her home
303
:care package and it does take time.
304
:Thing that, that kind of bothers me is.
305
:And I see it's, I see it playing
out in social media is the
306
:attractiveness of self management
because the fees are lower.
307
:And I always say to people, It
shouldn't base your decision on the fees.
308
:You have to understand that self
management, yes, it does give you greater
309
:choice and flexibility, but it does take
time and it takes time to set it up.
310
:And it does take time ongoing, like you
were saying, what if something happened to
311
:one of those carers to to maintain that.
312
:And then potentially if you
had needed a clinician to go and
313
:source your clinician as well.
314
:So, wonderful that you've highlighted
that because I , think it's
315
:important that people understand self
management is a great option, but.
316
:It does come with some challenges
317
:Susan: Yep.
318
:Coral: as well.
319
:Susan: And not not for everyone.
320
:Yep.
321
:Yep.
322
:Yeah.
323
:Coral: honestly.
324
:Like I talk about my dad who had
dementia, there was no way we
325
:could have self managed his home
care package because we were just
326
:completely exhausted just doing it.
327
:Giving that additional support that he
needed on top of the home care package.
328
:And we were fortunate that at that
time that the fully managed provider
329
:that I chose was very supportive and
very responsive in communication.
330
:So when I said we need this, or we
need to change this, they did that,
331
:but extending ourselves to self
management for dad would, it was,
332
:it just would have been impossible.
333
:So really important that people.
334
:Consider their capacity.
335
:And, is it worth, potentially 15 percent
is what most self managed providers
336
:charge, in our experience, most, a
lot of fully managed providers tend to
337
:charge around 30 percent in combined
fees, maybe paying that extra 15
338
:percent is worthwhile for some people.
339
:So I'm really grateful that you
brought that important point up.
340
:So I was going to say to you, perhaps
you've kind of answered it, but I'll
341
:just give you another opportunity in
case there's something you wanted to add.
342
:But I was going to ask you any tips
for people who might be considering
343
:assisting an older loved one with self
management of their home care package.
344
:\
Susan: yes.
345
:Well, like, like you said, we
have already covered very much.
346
:So making sure that you
do actually have the time.
347
:Coral: I think what's coming through from
you, Susan, is, doing your research.
348
:I think that's come through loud and clear
to me that you did a lot of research and
349
:consideration before making that decision.
350
:Susan: Yes.
351
:Very true.
352
:And yeah.
353
:Yeah.
354
:So I think.
355
:So I say, I think.
356
:The sort of key things are key decisions
are choosing the right provider and
357
:the appropriate sort of model and then
just being aware that there's going to
358
:be a lot of time and effort involved
359
:in especially personal care services,
like it was really hard finding someone
360
:that mum trusted enough to help her
shower, so yeah, you, you need to
361
:feel comfortable with the person
providing those kind of services.
362
:And so for that, that reason, I
was glad that we were self managing
363
:because we had that say in who
was coming to provide the services.
364
:Yeah.
365
:Coral: Fantastic.
366
:Well, you did a great job of setting
your parents up so they could remain
367
:at home for as long as possible.
368
:With the support that is available
from our aged care program.
369
:Do you have any advice for people
who might be considering getting
370
:their loved one into the system now?
371
:Any tips that might make
this process easier for them?
372
:Susan: I would say if you're
considering getting your loved ones
373
:into the system now, then do it.
374
:Because I think there's
quite a long lag time between
375
:getting approved for something.
376
:Getting assessed for something,
getting approved for something.
377
:And yeah, I would say just, I'm
trying not to, not to be too blatant
378
:about plugging your, your book
and the resources on your website.
379
:Honestly the articles that you have,
the blog posts that you've written I've
380
:actually I've referred friends to them,
and I've referred people to them as
381
:well in the Facebook groups when I see
people asking a question, I just say,
382
:look, just go to someone who knows,
go to a source that's authoritative.
383
:So, yeah, don't waste time, just yeah.
384
:It sounded by an act on it.
385
:Don't wait, because in the end, my mom
and dad, I think the the a cat assessment
386
:when they finally got an actual a cat
assessment, rather than a just a res
387
:assessment.
388
:It was in October of 2022.
389
:And then Mum passed away
in November of:
390
:So, we had this very short window.
391
:We had this huge flurry of of activity
and setting things up, finding services
392
:and things to put in place for them
to remain in their own home, but it
393
:lasted in the end for such a short time.
394
:And I really wished that we
could have done more sooner, but
395
:we didn't know what we were dealing
396
:with.
397
:Coral: Yeah.
398
:Susan: because of all the
misinformation out there.
399
:It's just a very, it's
a murky area, isn't it?
400
:Coral: It's
401
:murky
402
:and it's complex.
403
:And like you said, the
amount of misinformation out
404
:there, it's just too much.
405
:And look, I'm not going to
say, from official sources,
406
:there's misinformation as well.
407
:So, it's regrettable that that happens
because it does, it does mean that
408
:people get off on the wrong path and
it means they become more lost in the
409
:system and more confused and people
give up when they're at that point.
410
:So they delay getting those services.
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:We always say as well, people say to
us, well, when's the right time to, to
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:action is to get support for mum and dad.
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:And we say, well, if you're thinking
about it, then now is the right
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:time
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:to do it.
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:Now, don't delay.
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:Susan: And there is another bit
of advice that I, I, I realized.
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:So it was I think my mom and dad had
more than one assessment, father RAs.
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:So once again, before I realized
that there was even a different,
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:a difference and that I think as.
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:Subsequent assessment when things
were getting harder and we realized
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:it and we thought, okay, let's try
this again, get some more help.
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:And once again, we got a res
assessor, but what mom and dad
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:were doing was putting on a brave
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:face and saying.
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:What are you struggling with?
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:What are you having a hard time with?
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:What do you need help with?
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:And mom and dad were, well, Susan does
this for us and Peter does that for us
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:and this is how we manage the washing
and this is, and it was all, Bless them,
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:you know, they were, they were putting
on a, and it was true, like, but , what
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:didn't come out of that is how all
of those of us who were all doing the
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:helping, it was on top of our, trying
to keep our jobs and look after our
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:children in pits and, living far away.
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:It wasn't easy.
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:Coral: It's not easy.
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:It's incredibly, difficult and
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:Susan: And so, yeah, we just, it's sort
of just, it's about recognizing when
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:you need help and not being afraid to
acknowledge it and say, okay, it's
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:getting too hard now for, for us and
our, and our families, we need help.
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:Coral: Absolutely.
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:Having, having that
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:discussion with mom and
dad and just saying it.
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:is getting too hard, something's got
to change really important to have that
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:conversation or else people like you,
Susan, and adult children supporting
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:their older loved ones get, they burn out.
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:It happens, we know this, it takes a toll.
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:worst thing people can say, they
can be stoic and say that their
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:family is doing everything because
it, it does work against you.
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:In those assessments, and we just say
to people, all that help that your adult
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:children are providing, or your spouse, or
your neighbors, or whoever, just mentally
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:remove them from that situation, and then
reflect on, what are your limitations?
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:What
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:Susan: yeah.
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:Coral: can, you do for
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:yourself?
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:Susan: would you manage
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:without those people?
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:Yep,
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:Coral: that gives you a true picture.
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:Yeah.
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:Great point.
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:So look, it's been great
chatting with you today.
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:You've provided our listeners with
excellent insight and advice on how you
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:were able to support your parents at home.
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:So thank you very much.
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:Susan: You're very welcome.
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:Coral: That concludes this episode of
Your Aged Care Compass for this week.
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:Thank you for joining me again, listeners.
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:If you'd like to subscribe to this podcast
or leave a review, we'd be very grateful.
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:Until next week, take care.