Ednaija “Nay” Lassiter is the Girls’ Basketball Head Coach at Governors Academy in Byfield, Massachusetts. In addition to her coaching role, Nay is the founder and CEO of Heavy Hearted Convos, a non-profit organization dedicated to mental wellness and fostering open discussions about emotionally challenging topics.

Nay began her coaching career as a graduate assistant at Northeastern University, followed by an assistant coaching position at The College of Charleston.

As a player, Nay played college basketball at the University of Rhode Island and Southern Connecticut State University, earning a degree in Sociology.

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Be prepared with a notebook and pen as you listen to this episode with Nay Lassiter, Girls’ Basketball Head Coach at Governors Academy and CEO of Heavy Hearted Convos

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Adnasia Nay Lassiter is the girls basketball Head coach at Governor's Academy in Byfield, Massachusetts.

In addition to her coaching role, Nay is the founder and CEO of Heavy Hearted Convos, a nonprofit organization dedicated to mental wellness and fostering open discussions about emotionally challenging topics.

Nay began her coaching career as a graduate assistant at Northeastern University, followed by an assistant coaching position at the College of Charleston.

As a player, Nay played college basketball at the University of Rhode island and Southern Connecticut State University, earning a degree in sociology.

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Be prepared with a notebook and pen as you listen to this episode with Ednesia.

Nay Lasser, Girls Basketball Head Coach at Governor's Academy and CEO of Heavy Hearted Convos.

Hello and welcome to the Hoop Heads Podcast.

It's Mike Cleansing here without my co host Jason Sunkel tonight.

But I am pleased to welcome in at Nasia nay Lassiter from Heavy Hearted Convos and the Governor's School.

Nay, welcome to the Hoop Headspod.

Thank you.

Thank you for having me today.

Excited to have you on.

Looking forward to diving into all the interesting things that you've been able to do and experience in your basketball life.

Let's start by going back in time to when you were a kid.

I know basketball is kind of your family business, so tell me a little bit about how you got into it and what you remember about those early years with the game.

Yeah, so my uncle actually founded the AAU program that I played with for majority of my life.

He kind of pushed that drive.

He saw something in his nieces that they were extremely passionate about.

So it started at a really young age.

But I will say give a lot of credit to my uncle for pushing that drive and making sure we succeeded in a way that was beneficial for us.

So he started an AAU program called the Boston Showstoppers, which started in the city of Boston.

And it was a small group.

And then from there just started recruiting.

And then I went to Newton where I played high school basketball, ended up transferring to Archbishop Williams and then came back to New.

And so my early childhood days came from really my uncle playing basketball, seeing his friends playing.

He played at Suffolk University.

He didn't really have much skill on the offensive end, but his defense was incredible.

I compare him to Marcus Smart as such, but that's really where my drive came from.

And like I said, just he created a vehicle for us to pursue our dreams.

What did it look like for you as a middle school, high school player trying to get better?

What were you doing?

Were you on the court by yourself?

Are you working with your uncle?

Are you working with a trainer?

Are you playing and trying to find pickup basketball?

Just what's the process for trying to become the best player you could be in your middle school, high school years?

Yeah, honestly, I don't think I even knew back then.

You know, I knew where I wanted to get to, but I didn't necessarily know the work that was required.

But again, I did have my uncle who pushed me, and I had a lot of other people in my corner just growing my network through my uncle.

So I don't.

I wouldn't even say I knew what it was, but I was a basketball addict.

Like, I Love basketball.

It was something that I did every day.

So whether it was shooting, dribbling down the street, or even just going to the court to play pickup, that's something that I always did.

But as far as like knowing what work to do to actually pursue my dream, I had no clue, but I knew I had to drive.

So what does it look like for a high level female player to try to find pickup basketball and then to be able to kind of work your way into games with guys, which I'm assuming that that's something that you did probably pretty frequently, and then trying to find a group of young women that you could play against.

Just what were the challenges there?

Because obviously it's a challenge that on the male side, guys don't have that same issue.

Yeah, I would say, honestly, getting to get to where I got to, it came from playing with boys a lot of the time.

Unfortunately, in the city there were not a lot of spaces for young girls to play basketball.

It was very few spots within the city that you knew, like, okay, that's where we could go play.

So a lot of the times it was integrating the girls into the boys faces.

And honestly, I truly think that pushed myself and every one of my sisters that I played with to kind of make sure that we, we were the ones in the city that did make it out and that people saw us.

So wasn't much and thankful for my uncle for creating that platform for us and then, you know, letting us be who we are and showcasing our talent throughout the city.

But definitely started with playing with boys and making sure our name was known within the parks, within the teams, all that.

What was your favorite memory of your AAU basketball time?

My favorite memory, honestly, they're a couple.

So I played for my uncle and then my uncle used to always sprinkle me with the boys.

And so there was a program called mabc.

A man named Larry Merritt, he ran it.

And I'm coming in there, I'm the only girl in the gym.

And I'm thinking, he's going to take it easy on me.

And he threw the ball at me.

I would never, I'd never forget this day.

He threw the ball at me and I'm like, whoa.

Like, okay, so I'm.

I'm one of them.

I'm going to be treated like one of them.

And I think that was, that was one of my favorite memories because from there on I knew that I belonged because no one treated me differently.

He taught me, treated me the exact same.

The expectations were the same.

And I met him, you know, so from there I just was like, okay, I'm going to pursue this, this is what I want to do.

So I would say that's one of my greatest memories.

And of course, playing with the Boston Showstoppers and just building so many great relationships that I still have to this day was by far, you know, one of the, both the best experiences of playing basketball growing up.

Then talk about how playing with the Showstoppers and being on the AAU circuit, how that impacted your decision making process for where you were going to go to school and what your recruiting looked like.

Yeah, so me personally, I was recruited pretty late within my journey.

Unlike some of my other teammates, I was that late boomer, always had the game, but was really oversized for a guard.

And again, not knowing really what I wanted and how to do it.

So the diet wasn't there, but the game was the game, the heart was there.

So going state to state, playing against the highest competition possible.

We were a low market program, so not a lot of people knew us.

No, actually no one knew us, just to be quite frank.

Right.

And we were coming to gyms and we just had this hunger about us that you just couldn't deny.

Right.

So being on those sidelines and also going to see all these other girls, it made me, it was eye opening, one to make me realize how much I am lacking, but it was also beautiful in a sense where I was getting opportunity to showcase myself in front of college coaches when there were so many young girls who just didn't get the opportunity.

And you know, one thing I was told in my household at a very young age, growing up in a single parent household was like, I'm not paying for school, you know, I just don't have it.

So that was, that is really what drove me.

I looked forward to every Friday because the weekends were either away or we're playing in a college showcase.

So that's really what it was, navigating recruitment.

When it came.

For me, I only had about three schools to choose from, if I remember correctly.

And what a process, you know, like it was, it was really hard.

But ultimately I do feel like I made the right decision to, you know, for who I am today.

When you think of that decision making process, who in your life was there to kind of bounce thoughts off of, ask questions of.

Was there anybody, an adult in your life that kind of acted as a mentor through that process for you?

Honestly, no.

And I, and I only say that because I don't think the people around me honestly knew how to navigate that space.

Cause they hadn't done it before either.

So it was more of just trying to figure out what it is that I wanted.

All I knew I wanted was really basketball.

So I had my sister that I talked to a lot and you know, we're totally different.

She is kind of like, she sees everything through where I'm more of like, I react off emotion.

So using her was, was very useful.

But I didn't.

I don't.

I didn't have anyone for sure.

It was more of like people just excited and everyone's saying you should go here, but not really giving a reason, you know, so.

So what question.

What.

What questions then did you ask yourself?

What were some of the things that, in your mind as you were going through the process, what was important to you?

Obviously, as you said, the basketball piece of it kind of took precedence over everything.

But I heard you say a few minutes ago that getting the opportunity to go to school, right?

Knowing that if you could get a scholarship and pay for that, that that would open up an opportunity for you to have your education.

So just as you're going through, was it the school, was it the coach?

Was it the players that you met on your visit?

Was it.

What was it that you were looking for that helped you to make your decision?

Honestly, at that time, again, I don't think I knew what I wanted, but I knew that I wanted to make my family proud.

Uri is where I initially signed to and it wasn't too close to home.

And I felt like I was like stuck in between.

Like, I knew I needed to get away, but I felt like Uri was.

And it was in Kingston, not Providence, where most people think Rhode island is, Right?

Kingston is a little further out.

It's about an hour from Providence.

So I felt like it was further enough to kind of get away, but I really was looking for an escape, like an escape from my circumstances, from my environment, and just to feel something different.

So as I mentioned, growing up in a single parent household, like that was tough.

That came with stresses of itself that I just didn't recognize and eventually started to catch up to me.

So I felt like I needed a break and that's really what I was looking for.

Where is the program family oriented?

Where can my family still reach me and I can reach them?

And where are people growing and looking for places?

People and a place to opportunity to grow, honestly.

So you get there and what's that adjustment like for you coming from the environment that you came from, coming into?

Obviously a new Situation, new coaching staff, your new teammates, and then you have the school piece of it and all that that goes along with not only just adapting to the basketball side, but also adapting to the school side of it and the social and all that that goes along with going to college for the first time.

What did that look like for you?

What do you remember about your first couple days on campus and kind of trying to look around and figure things out?

Yeah, it was really hard.

I didn't know what I was walking into.

Although I was extremely grateful, it was really challenging.

Like I said, my uncle started the program for me, and it was kind of like, really grassroots.

Everything was really family oriented.

And when you go into the college business, it, like, everyone's really out for their own, right?

So when I was looking for that pat on the back or that teammate to lift me up and pick me up, it really wasn't like that.

It was like every shark out there on their own.

So navigating that was.

It was so hard because I had not come from an environment like that.

It was.

It was a big system that we all cared about each other, and we all work to be our best selves so that the next person could be their best self.

So that was really tough navigating.

And what that started doing to me was not being able to build relationships with people because I felt like, you know, there was.

It was kind of.

We were going at each other's heads all day.

So there was.

Instead of us trying to learn each other and understand each other as young women both coming in, it was more of us.

We started off way too.

Way too competitive at the start.

So that was extremely hard to navigate.

And again, being 18 years, 17.

18 Years old, like, I'm a young girl who.

I'm in that environment now, and I come from a similar environment.

And so all I knew how to do was take your head off, right?

That's just the way I competed was to fight, to be a dog, to be vocal, you know, to make sure you feel me on every possession.

But again, like, it started to affect the relationships that I was having with teammates, with coaches, because they didn't.

They didn't necessarily understand what they were seeing, right?

It was just, oh, whoa, she's.

She's a little too loud.

She's a little too rowdy, right?

Like, what's going on?

But that was the way that I put myself in the room.

But outside of the game, you know, I'm here, I'm.

I'm ready to rock.

I'm ready to make, you know, build relationships.

But the way that I competed was quite differently.

And I don't think at the time, college basketball, especially in the women's game, was appreciating that style of basketball.

So when you think about.

And we'll get back to the rest of your college experience, but I think this question fits right here.

So as you transitioned eventually into coaching and you think about coaching young women who maybe some of them have some of those same personality traits and way of going about things that you had, how do you make sure that you still want to keep that competitiveness?

Right?

Because if you want to be successful as a team, you have to have that internal competition.

And yet I think you hit on a really good point, and one that a lot of coaches, especially young coaches, sometimes struggle with, which is, how do I make sure that I keep that competitive spirit in my team during practice and at times when they're.

I need them to go at each other.

And yet as soon as we put the shoes away and we're in the locker room, that now we can go back to becoming one again instead of being the competitiveness.

So.

So how have you thought about that and approach that as a coach based on that experience that you had as a player?

That's a beautiful question.

I would say, honestly, I let everyone be themselves.

I don't try to change anyone.

If someone, you know, I have players who kind of don't speak at all, right.

And there's no point of me trying to force them to be too vocal, but maybe I can find another strength of bears.

And I think, you know, a lot of times, especially, you know, one, not that I making myself sound old, but when I was in college, it was like, you know, you had to be this way.

And that just came from older coaches being in the game, right.

And kind of wanting things how, you know, the military way in black and white.

But there is a gray area within everything, right?

So for me as a coach, I try to let people be people, let them be who they are and help them grow within who they are.

So, like I mentioned, like, I have players who are not vocal.

I have some that are too vocal and need to learn how to, you know, tone down their communication so that it can become effective, kind of like myself.

So embracing everything under and letting the team know that everyone is the same, no matter what your differences are, what your strengths are, we all have something to give to the mission and know to the program.

So that's truly my message and something that I can truly say.

I preach each and every day, as.

You well know, that psychological piece of getting everybody together on the same page and just the.

The relationship building, it's amazing.

I think people outside of the coaching profession or outside of professions that deal with kids or deal with athletics, when you're in, like, a business setting, I don't think people understand necessarily how challenging it is to be able to build those relationships, not only between coach and player, but also as a coach, to foster those player to player relationships so that you can have the kind of success where, again, everybody's competing, but at the same time, everybody still realizes that after we compete, we then have to come back together as a group if we really want to get to where we want to go and have success.

And so at Rhode island, that first season that you're there, you get out on the court, you.

You have a pretty successful freshman year, you get an opportunity to play in a lot of games, you start a bunch of games.

Just tell me what you remember about that experience.

Was it.

Did you look at it as a positive in terms of, hey, I'm getting on the floor, I'm getting an opportunity to contribute, or was there some things that.

Yeah, I'm getting to do those.

But maybe some of this other stuff in terms of the relationships maybe made you feel a little bit reticent about kind of what you were going through.

Where was your mindset as a freshman?

I was extremely happy to be playing, but I also knew that we could be better and there's more that we could do.

So I've always been that person who kind of never really worried just about herself.

It was more of like, how are we all moving in the same direction?

And I may not always have the best way of trying to demonstrate that or say that and articulate how, you know, what I was trying to accomplish, but that has always been where my heart is.

So it was really difficult for some people to understand why I was upset because I was playing.

But it just didn't seem like the program and the team was going in the right direction.

And there were a lot of situations that occurred that was really challenging.

Right.

The college basketball businesses, it is.

It's scary.

You know, there are a lot that doesn't go under the table anymore within college athletics, just, you know, with Title nine and all these things that are now put in place.

But there were so many things that were getting swept under the rug that I just, you know, wanted to be able to make change for.

And it was.

It was.

I saw myself suffering, I saw teammates suffering, and ultimately that suffering was.

It resulted in our record, honestly.

So that was really tough, trying to get people to understand, like, why I wasn't happy.

But it was like, you know, there's other things than just putting the ball in the hoop or lacing up and putting on this jersey.

Me as a human being has.

My holistic being has to be, you know, happy and feeling peaceful within my space.

So I truly felt like it was a lot more that I could give.

My mind was just in another spot, so it was affecting my physical ability.

Was there somebody that you felt like you could go to with those thoughts and express them?

Even if somebody didn't necessarily understand what you were saying?

Was there at least an outlet, somebody that you felt like you could talk to and at least share what you were feeling, even if they maybe couldn't fully understand what you were saying?

Yeah, I had my teammates, but that's.

That's honestly about it.

My teammates and my sister were always the space where I went to, but never within school, like within a school setting, within a team.

I never felt comfortable.

I tried it once or twice, but I always felt like there were things that did get to my coach.

And I was like, how did you know that, you know, like, how did you know I had that appointment?

Like, you know, so I never felt too safe in those spaces.

It was always just in the dorm room talking to my teammates, calling my sister or my friends back home, and then kind of just keeping me grounded and keeping my foot.

One foot in front of the other.

When you think about the, I guess, lack of connection, right, that you were able to have with your coaching staff, and I can honestly tell you, I'll give you a good story from.

And again, when you said you feel old, you're talking to a.

You're talking.

You're talking to a really old guy here.

When I.

When I say how long ago it was for me, so.

But back when I was playing, my coach was a guy who, again, old school, he was in the military.

There was very little personal interaction.

It was more just felt like, hey, what can we do to help our team win?

That was what our coach was interested in as far as, like, getting to know us as people.

It didn't necessarily feel like that ever happened.

I never would have gone to, especially my head coach with really anything of any kind of a personal nature, even talking about the team.

It was kind of just, he makes the decisions, tells you what to do, and then you try to go out and do it.

And when I graduated, didn't talk to him for probably, I don't know, 30 years.

And I actually got reconnected with one of my assistant coaches.

And in the course of talking to one of my assistant coaches, he's like, oh, your head coach would really like.

He.

He'd love to hear from you.

And I'm like, really?

And so I called him up on the phone, and I talked to him for, like, an hour and a half, and he knew things about my family.

He asked me about, like, my sister.

He was talking about this time that he talked to my parents in the parking lot after a game about such and such a thing.

And I was like, how.

Like, I had no idea that this guy would have had any inkling at all of who I was as a person or who my family was or whatever.

Like, I would have gotten no sense at all that he cared about me in that way.

And you look back on it, and you're like, and if he just would have given us collectively, as me and my teammates, just a little bit more of his humanity and a little bit less of his kind of hard line.

I often just think about how different our experience would have been, just as people, but then also, how much more successful could we have been as a team had we done those things?

And it's just.

Again, I just always look at it and think the people element is such a huge part of what makes A, the experience good, and B, also helps teams to be successful.

And I'll tell you, Nate, one of the things that has been interesting to me is as I become a parent and my kids have all played sports to varying degrees, degrees, whatever, and as I've gone through the process, I've come to realize that, yeah, I want them to do well on the court or on the field or whatever it may be, and that's important.

But ultimately, like, I want their experience to be good, and I want it to be one that they can look back on, where they have people that they're connected to as a result of that, and then they look back fondly on those experiences, and because the wins and losses and the points scored and all that stuff eventually melts away.

And it's just really interesting when I get a chance to talk to somebody like you who has an experience where, like, hey, you know, I'm playing, like, people around me should.

Should be thinking that, hey, this is.

This is great.

Like, she's getting to live out her dream and things are perfect, and yet, you know, that behind the scenes, there's so much more to the experience, but also so much more to you as a person than just as a basketball player.

So I don't know if anything that I just said resonates with you in any way, but that's kind of what I'm getting when I hear you talk, is there's an experience that it's not just on the court.

It's a more holistic experience that you.

That you're hoping to get or that you were hoping to get out of your college, you know, out of your college basketball playing days.

No, you hit it right on the spot.

And it resonated me, like, literally to the.

To the core, because I haven't spoken to my head coach yet, but I have seen a couple of the assistant coaches, and I still connect with the strength coach that, you know, who was there with while I was there.

A few of the assistant coaches I may talk to a few times throughout the year.

And there I was going back to Uri a ton.

There was.

There's a new coach.

There was a new coach.

She just actually left to go to Florida, to Coastal Florida Gators.

But I would go back there and connect with the academic advisors that I had, you know, the athletic staff, the athletic trainers.

So it was.

It brought me back to, you know, although people may not have seen or understood what we needed then, to see the relationship come to fold now, although I had a really difficult time in college, it is really beautiful and something that I'm grateful for because people grow, too.

And that's something that I had to be mindful of throughout my journey.

It's like I can be so angry and I could be mad and wish this person did this for me, but we're all growing, and I have to give the same grace that I would like as well.

Yeah, that makes complete sense.

Right?

And it's hard sometimes in the moment to.

To be able to recognize that.

And sometimes you don't even know yourself what you want or what you need.

You may not even recognize until.

Until years later.

You're like, oh, I wish that would have been different.

I wish this again.

When I was doing it just the way it was, there was no, like, hey, I don't have anything to compare it to.

I'm not playing in any other schools.

I'm not playing for any other coach.

This is just kind of.

It is what it is.

And so I know that when you and I talked before we jumped on the podcast, just about the experience that you had and then how that kind of led you into what you're doing today, and we're going to get more into that as we go through the conversation.

But just maybe here's a good time to just kind of talk a little bit about how your experiences as a college athlete have kind of impacted the direction that you've kind of taken your professional life.

Yeah.

So my experience just, you know, like I said, navigating mental health challenges while being a Division 1 athlete in itself was a job, and then trying to be a great student.

So I just.

While I was hurting, I kept a journal of everything that was bothering me.

And like I said, I always talk to my teammates.

And I started the organization, which it started off as a clothing brand at first, to bring mental health, to kind of bring everything that I was writing into a clothing brand while I was in school, things that I could wear to express myself.

Because for some reason, I always felt like my mouth got me in trouble.

So I always tried.

I was like, you know what?

What if I can wear it, right?

Like, what if I can walk around with it and we bring some fashion to it?

We not only bring the conversation around mental health, but it's also fashionable.

So start off as a clothing brand.

And then when I end up transferring from URI after losing my scholarship, I went to Southern Connecticut State and graduate and literally graduated in the middle of COVID I was in class, English class.

I vividly remember this.

And they was on the loudspeaker.

They made us all go home.

We had to all pack up and leave campus.

So I went home, and I'm like, everything just hit me at once.

It was like, whoa.

I felt completely unfinished.

I felt like, you know, I wasted a lot of my time.

I was angry with myself, angry at coaches, angry at teammates, angry at my family, like, angry at the world.

Just totally upset, sad, lost myself.

And I thought about, like, how many athletes are, like, failing the way that I'm failing, you know?

And, you know, I had this mental fortitude to continue pushing, right?

But there were times when I had suicide idolations and didn't want to live and felt like my life was over, like I had no purpose.

And I kept seeing stories of athletes, you know.

You know, dying by suicide.

And that was really tough because, again, I felt like that should have been me, But I just kept going.

And there was a point where I'm like, you know what?

Like, I have to give someone else the platform to have a heavy heart of combo.

My heavy.

My heart is heavy.

I need these conversations that my teammates, what my teammate was giving me, I needed to give that to the world.

So that's where heavy hearted combos initially started from was just trying to turn pain into purpose and help athletes and individuals from all walks of life who, you know, may feel like they are failure or may feel like, you know, they.

They put themselves in certain positions or their home circumstances are not how they want it to be.

Just having a platform to talk because we all need people and we all need a conversation.

And I. I truly think conversations can help people grow because it definitely helped me grow.

So that's where the nonprofit really kicked off when I got home, just wanting to bridge the mental health and wellness gap in sports any way that I could.

And we started off with one.

One initiative.

It was a basketball tournament.

And what we did was we try to invite as many girls as possible to create spaces for them and bring some mental health practices and tools for them with some guest speakers from college athletes and professionals who played so that they're pouring back into the next generation.

But that's where it started.

I know that was a lot.

Oh, that's great.

Because again, helping me to understand kind of what your vision was initially, right, is okay, you've had these experiences yourself, and now you're looking at it going, okay, well, I want to try to help somebody who maybe is heading into this same situation or maybe has already experienced it, and how can I utilize what I have to be able to have an impact on that next generation so that they don't experience some of those same challenges that you face.

So to be able to again, start something from scratch and figure out, like, okay, I got this vision of kind of what I think I want to do, but then how do I actually take it from an idea over here to something concrete that I can utilize?

And obviously, I always say, hey, that one of the things that I love about doing the podcast is that it's a platform, that it's centered around basketball.

But I get to have conversations like this that I feel like are bigger than the game of basketball.

And I get to use basketball as the vehicle to be able to have an impact.

Whether that's a conversation like this that maybe helps somebody who's going through a difficult time.

Maybe it's just a conversation with a coach about how they build their program.

And maybe there's some little thing that a coach grabs from it and takes it and implements it.

And all of a sudden, now they've created a better environment, a better experience for the players that are a part of their program.

And I can never give back to basketball what basketball has given to me.

But I do Think that the opportunity to use the game to make an impact on whoever it might be is the thing that I always find to be the most gratifying and the most powerful.

And I think that's kind of where you started out, right?

You're like, okay, I've got these ideas.

Let me utilize it.

Through the game of basketball to be able to reach young women who are in the similar position that I was in.

And now I can find experts and people to, to bring in to be able to help them to navigate those things.

So I think just to be able to put that together and how close is where it is today to what your initial vision was when you first, when that light bulb first went off and you like, I want to do this.

How close is what you're doing today to what the original vision was?

It's, it's, it's taken off.

It's taken so many different directions and it's crazy.

I literally just was, I was looking at old photos of like apparel that we did and our first, our first programming that we put out and just how I put so much pressure on myself now, the same way I did as an athlete, to be so great instead of just enjoying the process.

But I've come so far, I've learned so much and I try to, I always bring that back to my basketball career and in life and even as a coach now, like instead of looking at the overall picture and the overall goal.

Right, yes, you want to get there, but how are you taking care of each and every day?

And I had to pat myself on the back recently because things have gotten increasingly better every year.

Our programming has gotten better.

The organization continues to grow and continues to make a larger impact on youth in the city of Boston.

So although I feel like there's so many places I should be and I can be and I may be missing out on like just seeing how far we have come has been beautiful.

So lay out the spaces where you're at.

Give me some of the, an idea of some of the things that you're doing now, some of the initiatives that you have going.

So every year we have a Mindfulness Athletic Summit and what that is.

It's a one day mental health and wellness initiative where we bring mental health practitioners, clinicians, people with sound bars, yoga, stress therapists.

We have a really strong panelist full of women and men who play from all levels of sports, whether it's basketball, soccer, football, NFL players, NBA players, WNBA players.

We've even had executives who are within sports teams come and talk to the youth and just to give the youth an understanding about how to use the game.

Not as like Kyrie said something and it was a quote that I love because this is something I truly believe in.

But instead of using basketball as your master, it's your tool, right?

So how to navigate, how to use this game of basketball to yes, continue to pursue greatness, but use this platform to get you in different rooms and how you may not make it to the NBA, but maybe you can make it to the NBA in another way.

Right?

And the same for the wba.

The ball always stops bouncing.

But how can you navigate yourself and still be useful and valuable in different spaces?

And that's not something that I ever was taught growing up.

It was just basketball players.

So that's really important to me.

And we do that every November, kind of in the start of the city of Boston's athletic season to get as many youth out as possible, just to get their mental health and wellness, get them to think about it, get them to start that conversation, to understand that it matters.

We have a mentorship collective program and that's a year round mentorship program for youth ages 14 to 25.

And what we do is we pair individuals one on one mentors.

They meet weekly and we come together as a group every month just so the youth can come together and have these heavy hearted conversations.

And we give them, you know, we track their progress and their goals and help them reach some of the things, whether it's internships, jobs in that regard.

And we also have our Ladies Hoop two showcase which we have every year.

And this is the, honestly, the only platform for women's basketball within the city.

We bring over 250 girls each year.

And when I'm in the competition, it's high level.

It's a weekend just for girls basketball.

Even down to the referees, every referee is a woman.

Like we're really celebrating women in sports.

We give a community award every year to two young women in the community that are pouring into the city, to women in sports and just to young girls in general.

And honestly, I would say the showcase is something that I'm really proud of because again, it's the only year round platform that young women have.

Every other space that we've had, it's, you know, it's been here, but it's gone missing or it's every other year.

So trying to keep this up consistently so that the girls feel seen, they feel validated and they feel, you know, that their, their talents are being, you know, respected in the same way that the men are.

So that has been lovely.

And this year we're starting our first ladies Hutu clinic.

And what that is, it's a free clinic open to elementary and middle school girls.

And one thing that I, that drives me crazy and I coach now and I see it a lot.

It's just the, the learning curve for young ladies right in, in boys basketball, the athleticism kind of can make up for a lot, but within the girls game you really kind of have to have knowledge of the game, you know, a strong iq.

And I feel like there are a lot of young girls, you know, watching so much NBA and that basketball is not what emulates the dub NBA.

And so they're lacking so many skills, whether it's learning how to line up from the free throw line or learning, you know, where out of bounds is and things that what a travel is.

So what we wanted to do this year was really be that space where young girls are actually learning the game.

Not just while growing their game, but also building relationships with coaches and mentors and with athletes where they want to be.

So having all college level athletes as a staff and some professionals is what we're trying to do.

But this will be our first year.

We're super excited.

It's limited to only 80 spots and we're filling out quickly and we look forward to hosting it this year.

All that together.

Yeah, yeah.

From your perspective of getting all the people involved, from the mentors to the athletes to the executives to the coaches to the officials to all that kind of thing, I can only imagine what that looks like from an administrative standpoint of trying to talk to all those people and explain your mission and getting them involved in it.

So what does that process look like for you?

How hands on are you?

Who helps you with that?

Reaching out to the people who eventually serve as the mentors and the people that are going to pour back into the, to the youth that come and participate in all of your events and activities.

And so it's a small team, it's only three of us and the two staff that I have, they kind of are in and out.

So mainly, I don't want to say it's mainly me, but we do operate as a team.

But for the most part I've been just.

My foot's been on the gas with this since I started and it's slightly a lot of relationship building same similar to what I was doing.

You know, being an athlete, I will say has helped because a lot of people know my name in the city and know What I've accomplished and where I've come from and what I've done.

So that's beautiful.

And just trying to, like you said, get them to understand my mission behind, what it is that we're actually doing.

It starts with first, me being vulnerable about my journey, right?

Not trying to gaslight anybody, make it seem like I had this magical career because I did it right.

It didn't end up working out the way that I wanted it to, but that's why it's my goal to make sure the next person's situation is different.

So it starts with just that, right?

Building that relationship where there's transparency through all communication.

And usually people end up wanting to be on board.

But it definitely is hard just getting people all in one spot and consistency trying to grow every year, stay open to the trends.

It's really hard.

And AI is not making anything better.

But I will say it's making it better, but also is making everything kind of look the same at this point.

I don't know if that makes sense to you, but we want to stay different.

So we don't want to just use AI to get things done quickly when we want to make a real intentional impact.

No, I think you're 100% right there when you're looking at the uniqueness.

I listened to a podcast talking about how with college essays and how different people wrote college essays, and then the graders graded those essays, and they all graded the individual essays as being well written when they were written by AI, but then they all kind of followed, like, the same theme.

So it was like the creativity, the writing itself was good, but it.

They were all kind of the same because AI can't.

And I think to your point, that is something that I'm starting to see just with some of the stuff that I do.

There's a time where I'm like, oh, maybe I just have AI come up with an idea for that.

And then I look at.

I'm like, that sounds just like Program X down the road.

Let me just change that and make sure it's in my voice so that that gets out so I can completely understand what you're saying.

And I'm sure the other thing that popped into my head as you were talking is, is that I'm sure that from the beginning, when you first started, and you have to articulate it completely to that very first person that you're trying to get to come on board, right, you got this idea, and you got to get that first person to say yes.

And now that you've been established for a couple of years.

I'm sure it's a little bit easier now to reach out to somebody and say, hey, I've already got this.

These are the people who are involved rather than.

It's just me as myself trying to reach out to, with, with a vision.

I'm sure it's easier now than it was initially, although you probably need more people now, so maybe that mitigates it.

Yeah, it's definitely easier.

And I think, you know, using social media as the platform to kind of get out what it is that you're doing.

People are seeing that on social media and so they're seeing the work that we're doing and, you know, they want to be a part of it.

So it's always beautiful.

But I will say my pitch is getting better, but I feel like it changes all the time because there's so many ideas in which I want to go to.

So that's been the hardest thing sometimes, like telling myself like, okay, just go, just kind of be concise with it because I can go on and on about what I want to do with heavy hearted combos and the impact that we can have.

But you know, trying to, when you say too much, that's kind of when you lose people.

So saying less, less has been more, honestly.

Well, it's, it's the vision, right?

The vision's all.

The vision's up here.

And then you got to kind of narrow it down so that you can actually get somebody to understand what it is that you're trying to do.

So I can, I can totally relate to that.

I definitely have a million ideas.

I'm like, yeah, those are all ideas.

But I got to really figure out what I can, what I can execute on.

So I'm guessing that based on the conversation that you and I have had for the last 40 minutes, that part of your desire to do what you did with heavy hearted convos, but also getting into the coaching profession has to do with you making an impact in a way that maybe you felt like coaches that you played for weren't there for you.

So talk a little bit about why you wanted to go into coaching.

And when the idea of becoming a coach crossed your mind first, was that something that you were thinking about while you were playing?

Or once you were done, you look back and you're like, and I'd like to maybe try to help somebody else have a different experience than the one I had.

Just when did coaching get on your radar and why was it important?

Honestly knew I wanted to Coach.

When I was playing in college, like I was always that person that was in the coach's office, like going through X's and O's.

I always did the extra workouts.

I, I, you know, I studied the film, I knew the plays.

So I've always wanted to be a coach.

And it's funny, my head coach actually told me, she used to always tell me, like, you're gonna be a coach someday, like you're gonna be a coach whether you want to or not.

And I'm like, cause she drove me crazy.

I'm like, there's no way, there's no way you're gonna, like, you don't know me, you know.

So back to, you know, how they all, you don't think they know something, but they do.

But she definitely knew something that I didn't know because coaching is something that I'm extremely passionate about.

It's something that I can't let go.

But I honestly, I love what I do.

But I got into coaching like you said, just because I wanted to change the trajectory of young girls lives.

And again, you can play basketball.

You don't even have to have the goal to want to play Division 1 or play college basketball at all.

But if you play, how can I still be an impactful in your life regardless of what your, you know, how far you go, how far you don't go.

And that's always been something that drives me because I feel like I was only loved at a certain point because I was succeeding as an athlete.

And that was really tough because when it didn't go my way, not everyone was reposting me or liking my Instagram pictures the same.

Right.

And that was really hurtful and it made me feel like just me as a human didn't matter.

So I vowed to never have an athlete of mine feel like that.

Whether they want to play or they don't want to play.

This is just a place where we're going to push to be our best self each and every day.

Whether you fail, that's fine because we're going to fail and we're going to grow and we're not going to be afraid of failure.

But I will say I was afraid of failure because I knew that maybe people weren't going to like me.

You know, I was afraid of all those things that I couldn't control.

So that's who I try to be as a leader.

And I love it.

I truly love coaching.

I'm passionate.

Everyone that knows me will tell you, you can hear me from a Mile away, you're gonna hear my voice.

That's always been what it was.

But they also will tell you that I push what I push with love.

And that's something that has.

I'm not always good at taking it, but it really feels good to my heart, you know, when I hear those things.

Cause it's like, okay, I'm doing what I said I was gonna do, and I'm being who I said I was gonna be.

Really heartening to hear you say that you're valuing somebody as more than just a basketball player.

Because I think that when I think about the experiences that I've tried to generate for the players that have played for me, when I've coached teams and coached individuals, that's what I always try to do, is see that it's more than just the game.

It's more than just your performance.

And I've tried to do that as a parent with my own kids, of looking at it like, want you to do your best.

You got to learn how to maximize your talent.

And yet, at the same time, you have to understand that regardless of how you perform in a given game, that's not really what it's all about.

I'm gonna love you the same way when you come home, whether you scored two points or you scored 25 points, it doesn't.

Whether you won, you lost.

But that stuff, again, I want you to do well.

But if you don't, we're going to talk about it.

We're going to figure it out.

I'm still going to.

I'm still going to love you in the same way.

And I think that that's something that I've come to, again, realize that what's important is the experience, because all the other stuff melts away.

Like when I was playing.

And I'm sure you felt the same way that when I was playing the individual game, to me and my performance and my team's performance, like, in the moment, like, that was the most important thing to me in the moment.

Like, I. I mean, I live, breathe, died with how I performed on the court.

And yet now here I am, whatever, 35 years later.

And I can even honestly say, like, five years after I was done grad, after I graduated, I was done playing.

Like, people would ask me about, hey, do you remember that game against whatever when you were a sophomore?

And whatever.

I'm like, if that was a league game, like, I might have played that team 10 times.

Like, I don't.

You know, like, I don't remember that individual game.

I Don't have one of those kinds of memories.

And what I remember is my teammates and the feelings and the road trips and all the stuff that had nothing to do that in the moment, I was like, whatever.

But I was worried about my performance.

But ultimately, what fell away was my performance, and what was left with was the experiences and the people and all that stuff.

And so I think, as coaches, to be able to understand that lesson and for you to understand it early in your career, because of your experience as a player and being able to internalize that and understand it and then say to yourself, as a coach, I want to be able to provide an experience that maybe wasn't like the one that I had.

That can be powerful stuff.

And so I'm sure that the players that have had an opportunity to play for you have felt that.

So going back to the decision or the idea of, hey, I want to coach, what's once you know that that's the direction you want to go?

What's the first step?

Who do you call.

What do you do to try to get into the coaching profession?

What's the first step to trying to get your first coaching job?

Yeah, so I was a GA at Northeastern, and that was really the first step to getting into college, learning the game at a higher level.

So my goal was always to get to college, and my goal is still to get to college one day and even maybe the pros.

But I started as a GA at Northeastern, and after that transitioned to coaching at the College of Charleston, where I learned a number of different tools and got my feet wet in a different state.

So kind of learned the business, kind of learned how to, you know, really orchestrating a college basketball team, work and just a team in general.

There was a lot of things that I did at Charleston that I didn't do at Northeastern, whether it was, like, booking flights and, like, you know, looking at the overall budget and, you know, we had camps, team camps, kind of doing all the organizing for that.

So after leaving the College of Charleston, I'm like, you know, I feel like I can run my own program.

Like, let's go put my head in.

Let's go put my hat out there, put my name in some different hats, and Governor's Academy was one of them, and they reached back out, and the relationship has been beautiful ever since.

It's a place that I love.

I consider.

I consider it home.

And every year, as a program, we've gotten better and better and better since I've been there.

And my goal, ultimately, is to bring a championship to the school and bring a championship, you know, to the girls and change their lives.

Because I know it will.

Like you said, the memories are something that you'll remember forever.

So going on that pursuit for that championship, they may not remember the game, but they will remember that season and the smiles and relationships.

So that's something that, you know, I've been on a hunt for since starting and this would be my fourth year.

As a assistant coach.

Obviously, when you're a GA and then you get an assistant job, decision making process doesn't end with you.

You're the suggestor.

You, you bring ideas to the table, or you're booking flights, or you're figuring out meals, or you're.

Whatever it is that you're doing, but you're.

Sometimes you're just a fly on the wall, though.

Sometimes you're just a fly on the wall.

That is true.

That is.

That is definitely true.

Sometimes you just sit and absorb, right?

Especially at the GA level.

There's no doubt about that.

So when you get to run your own program, obviously now you get to make the decisions.

But when you first stepped from assistant to running your own program, what did you enjoy most about being that ultimate decision maker?

What did you enjoy?

What was the process or what was the piece of it that you really took the most joy from?

Oh, that's a good question.

I will say I got the most joy of having it come up with answers for you.

For young girls, right, like when they needed somebody, my phone was the one that was ringing.

When there was a problem, my phone was the one that was ringing.

And being a solution is for them in their lives, you know, whether it was big or small was something that I really valued.

Because to me, you know, whether it was big or small, I felt like, you know, little things add up and if I can show them that I'm here for this, this, you know, then I.

They'll know I can be here for the big things.

So that was the most gratifying that the.

That's what I found really gratifying throughout the whole process and just simply building the relationships with each and every girl.

Like I said, like, every one of them is completely different.

They have different personalities, different hobbies and, you know, and at the prep school level, sometimes you have players who play other sports.

So I have a ton of lacrosse players.

And even being able to learn their game and how they, you know, the lacrosse game is played and how you just use various parts of your body, like just having them feel, seen, validated, it really does Help the rest of the team.

The camaraderie, I would say because.

And it makes people push harder.

Because if you can see me that as a basketball player, but who I am, I'm going to make sure I go through this wall for you, right?

I'm going to make sure I do exactly what you say.

And I think that's just a respect piece.

So I would say that's been beautiful.

And ultimately just being able to make sure that the program is player led, right, that's something that I have been always wanted to do.

Like wherever I run a program, it's never going to be about me, it's going to be about the players.

And that's just how it's going to be.

They're always going to be the priority.

So being able to be the voice of that and run the organization how I would like to run it, and making sure our players are validated and seen and respected each and every day is.

It's been beautiful.

It's been really beautiful.

What is that player led program look like boots on the ground.

So when you say it's a player led program, I have a vision in my head of what that means.

What does that mean to you on a day to day basis?

Give me an example or two of something that says, hey, this, this shows this little activity or this, that we do it this way demonstrates that this is a player led team.

Just for a coach who's out there listening and saying like, hey, I'd like to incorporate more of less of that top down me always dictating everything.

What are some things that you do to give the players that sense of, that sense of connection, that sense of camaraderie that you were talking about.

A lot of conversation and sometimes it starts, you know, just reaching out individually to players and just asking how they're doing.

We don't have to talk basketball, but let's talk life, right?

Seeing how mom is, seeing how the dog's doing.

And if you listen, if you're a good listener as a coach, sometimes you'll hear things that maybe you could talk about later on, whether it's their interpersonal relationships, you know, that's something you could talk about.

But another thing that I found really useful is giving the players a voice.

Stop always making decisions for them, right?

So lay out one or two, three options and you delegate someone and say, hey, can you get the team to come to a consensus on this?

And that way they're all working together and it's not coach in the room or coach's opinion.

And they feel like, oh, we have to pick this because coach is here now.

What I also try to do is I'm a coach who's vocal, so I believe my players should be vocal.

So a lot of times, players, coaches, they see my players and I going back and forth.

I don't look at it as like, you know, they're disrespecting me or disrespecting the program.

It's both of us coming to an understanding of what needs to be done.

And that's been beautiful because the players understand it.

And the more voice I give them, I feel like the more they learn and the more they trust me on their journey.

You don't want someone just always telling you what you have to do, right?

You want someone to tell you, like, you know, sometimes you want to tell them what you want to do too, and that's okay.

And how can we tweak it and meet in the middle?

So that, that's something that I have found very useful as far as my player led program.

But it really starts with just communicating.

Communication.

Communication.

It's a lot of talking.

And sometimes, you know, as coaches, there have been times where I've seen coaches take the communication to another level.

You have to make sure you know, you're.

You're the adult in the room at all times.

Right.

So although we communicate a lot, trust me, they know I know where to draw the line and it will be drawn.

So always keep that in mind too.

But that's definitely some tips that I would give to a coach.

When you think about the communication with players and having those conversations where you're getting to know them, do you think of those as being more informal?

Like you're walking before practice and talking to players while they're stretching, or you're grabbing lunch with somebody or.

Or are they more intentional?

Like, hey, we're having a meeting once every two weeks to kind of sit down and get.

Do a check in of where you're at.

So I don't know, do you do it informally, formally?

Do you just.

What's the process for having those conversations that allow you to get to know your players so that you can have the kind of relationship like what you're talking about?

I think it's a little bit of both.

Right?

And when you start to really learn your players, you start to learn when is kind of the best time to get them?

Because there's some players who as soon as you say 1, 2, 3, practice is over, they're sprinting out their mind.

Is done.

You may not get anything out of them.

So maybe you get them before, or maybe they're better when they're in their dorm room, you know, kind of relaxed after their long day.

And you call them on the phone.

It really, it changes every time.

But something that I don't always do, but I try to do, and this has been really helpful, was like after a bad game.

So whether it's a good game, I will ask someone like, hey, what's something that I could have did better at?

And quite frankly, they're always quite honest with me.

Like when you yelled all that possession, you did a little too much.

And that always puts me back in my place, but giving them the opportunity to correct me as well.

So that it shows that we're all here, like, we're all growing.

I'm not perfect.

I'm your leader, but I'm not perfect.

And I would never pretend to be that.

That, that kind of lets everybody relax.

Like, ooh, we could fail.

And she's still gonna love me.

You know, she's gonna, she's gonna yell, but I know she still loves me.

So it's a mix of both for sure.

You gotta.

I, I wouldn't say it's one way or the other.

I do like the combination because again, you gotta, you have to meet people where they are.

Yeah.

That vulnerability that you mentioned too, I think is really important, right?

Especially in today's world where it's not the top down.

Everything I say is gospel and anything that you say is completely discarded and not important.

It's much more of that, as you said, the two way street of being able to communicate back and forth.

And when you can communicate that, hey, I'm not perfect, like, hey, I made a mistake here, or hey, I've made mistakes.

Here's an example that we can all learn from something that I did in my life that we can take as a lesson that can help us to improve as people and as players.

I think there's a lot of power in that.

And it again, builds the human connection.

Right.

Because for so often, for so long when we're kids, right, we look up to adults and we often think that those adults can never do anything wrong.

And then as we get older, we realize that, hey, those adults are just as they're trying to figure it out the same way I am when I was 12 or 13.

I think you realize that about your parents as you get older.

I know that, you know, you look at it, you're like, oh, I felt like my parents had it all together and then you look and you're like, I'm sure my dad or my mom felt similar the way I do that.

You're just kind of flying by the sea, your pants, trying to figure it out.

Do the best that you can in the moment with what you have.

And so I do think that vulnerability is a huge, is a huge part of what can play into the success of a coach and the ability to build relationships like what you're.

What you're talking about.

And obviously you coaching at the prep school level is unique.

You know, we have a lot of high school coaches, we have a lot of college coaches, and I've had some prep school people on, but I think again, in the Northeast, people are pretty familiar with the prep school model.

In a lot of other areas of the country, prep schools are kind of like, what.

What are we, what are we talking about?

So tell us a little bit about what you enjoy about coaching at the prep school level.

What makes it unique?

Oh, that.

What makes it unique.

I will say every, every day is you don't.

Within the knapsack.

I would say that's what, that's what I coach in the knapsack.

You never know who you're going to get and everyone is really good.

Like, you know, these night in and night out, there was someone that can give you their best.

And that's what I loved about it because I went to Newton north and there was only maybe two to three teams that we knew every year that that was kind of the only one circled on the calendar.

Everyone else we killed and that didn't really push us.

Right.

That didn't really get us any better, but it was fun.

But I will say the NEP Stack is extremely competitive and it grows every year.

You'd like these teams and these schools are getting in players every year.

So it's either you keep up or, you know, you're just going to get left behind.

I would say that's one of the hardest things also, although it's really, you know, fun to be a part of, it's really hard to recruit within these schools.

These schools cost so much money and, you know, financial aid.

A lot of kids need the financial aid to come to these schools.

So that's been really hard to navigate.

But other than that, I'm someone who, you know, whatever you, whatever you give me, I'm going to try to work with this and we're going to do the best that we can.

I have no complaints.

For me, you know, the job is a job.

Let's see what we have here and let's get to work.

So that's kind of been my approach.

I never try to get too greedy when it comes to recruiting players or I need that player and, you know, making players feel like they have to be at gums.

I just try to continue to build great, great relationships just across the board so that, you know, if that player ever feels like, you know, Guv's is their place, hey, we're here for you.

But again, if a player just needs someone to talk to, that's.

That's where I come in and that's where I vow to always be.

So it's been beautiful, just the competitive nature, but recruiting has been difficult.

Yeah, I would think that when you have the, the number of schools, right?

And just again, as the prep school, that route has become, I think, more popular or at least more well known, where more players start to see it as an opportunity.

Especially when you start talking about the next level and the way that the nil and the Portal and all that, those things have changed that now the opportunity for a player to take an extra year to be able to maybe maximize their opportunity at the next level, which obviously was always there at the prep school level, but now I think even more so, players think, hey, I get another year to develop academically, I get another year to develop athletically.

And now maybe that opens up some more opportunities for me at the next level to be able to have the chance to maybe play at a Division 1 school versus previously I could have gone to a Division 2 or Division 3 or whatever it might be.

So I could totally see where, again, it's a challenge to recruit and bring in the players.

When you're talking about the knapsack and the number, as you said that the quality of competition that you're playing day in and day out, and yet at the same time, the opportunity that the kids are afforded to play for you and to play in your program, to be able to then get those opportunities to move on and play and maybe reach their dream, if that's what it is, to be able to go and play, play college basketball for you as a coach, developing your craft and obviously all the things that we've talked about are a huge part of developing your craft.

Right.

Is understanding how to motivate players and how to connect them and build relationships.

Like that's all super important.

Let's shift a little bit to the basketball side of it.

How do you work on your craft as a basketball coach?

X's and O's Philosophy, how you want your teams to play, where do you go, who do you talk to, what do you look at, where do you go to study the game?

You have to watch a lot of basketball.

And I watch basketball on, you know, all levels, high school, college, professional, both men and women, just to learn the different nuances from different games and how you can kind of bring both games together.

Building relationships, again, like with different college coaches and being able to call coaches who are my mentors within all different levels of conferences and the NCAA has been something that I'm extremely grateful for.

Because if there's something that I need or need help on, you know, whether it's like, look, this team plays three, two tonight, you know, what are some quick hitters that I can implement today that the team can learn kind of fast because there's usually a two day turnaround.

So learning from different coaches, going into different college practices, a lot of colleges have opportunities for open practice.

Or you can build a relationship with the coach, the head coach, or some assistants, and they'll let you in.

Just being a sponge.

I'm someone who, I can watch basketball all day.

I can sit in the office all day and cut up film and watch film and clip it, just because I really love the game of basketball.

So that's the way that I study.

And using systems like synergy and YouTube clips to kind of watch old basketball games and go back and watch like, oh, how did Brad Stevens run that play?

Or Joe Mazhula.

Right.

These are all things that I do nonstop.

I do go to the Final Four every year, which has been beautiful.

And again, building relationships there and just asking different players different questions so that I can bring back and be better for my athletes has been extremely helpful.

But again, you know, just putting my hat in different places and making sure I'm learning in every way possible is something that I try to do.

Yeah, the ability to use film.

Right.

And synergy, what it's done for coaches to be able to pull up anywhere, any league in the world, anywhere you want to go, any level, you can find it and go in and do a deep dive on a coach, a team, a league, whatever it is that you want to do.

And so, again, just a tremendous tool for learning and being able to, as you said, add some nuance to your game and what you do as a coach.

So to go along with that, if somebody comes to one of your games or comes into one of your practices, what are the one or two things that you would hope that who.

Somebody who sits down if they Come to your practice and they sit down, they watch your team, or they go to a game and they sit in the stands and they watch your team.

What, what do you hope they take away as the one or two things that a nay laster team is known for?

These one or two things.

What are those things?

They're going to be tough and they're going to have zero excuses.

There are no excuses.

We get the job done and that's just that if the job is not done, then we failed.

You know, let's learn from and move on.

But we did not accomplish our mission.

So I would say if you come into our practice, you're going to see girls going 100 miles per hour, you know, nonstop, putting their best foot forward at all times.

And if you ever come to a game, you're going to see the same.

You're going to see toughness from both ends of the floor and a team that never gives up, that is simply relentless.

Honestly,.

That sounds good.

If you can get that going, you're.

You're halfway there.

The, the magic, the magic of basketball is one, you got to play extremely hard, and number two, I always say you got to share the ball, right?

And if you do those two things, there's a lot of ways to get to those two things.

But if your team plays hard on both ends of the floor and nobody cares who scores, you're about 98% of the way there to be to being a successful, successful basketball team.

So talking about practice and get an opportunity to see, hey, how tough your team is, we don't make excuses.

When you're putting together a practice plan, what does a typical practice look like for your team?

Do you like to have it structured in a similar way where, hey, we always come in and we do skill development for the first 20 minutes, then we're on defense, then we're offense.

Or do you kind of mix it up day to day based on what you feel like your team needs at a given moment?

So for us, we do everything in blocks, and typically it goes off because we don't have much time to prepare.

Like college, it goes.

Our practice slots after games are usually to prepare, or half of it will be what we missed on the previous game or watching and film, and the other half will be to prepare for our next opponent.

But for the most part, every block goes off of each other.

So one thing is like from the first block to the second block, what we did on the first block is going right to the second block and second block going to the third so there's nothing that you really should be missing on.

Everything goes into each other and the learning should be continuous.

So that's something that I try to do every single practice.

One thing we do, what we don't miss is every practice we end with free throws.

A lot of the times you see a great game and then a team doesn't hit free throws right or fouls too much.

It's those little, little things that really change the game.

So at the end of a hard practice, we always finish retreat throws.

Always, always, always.

Because those really matter.

They're free.

It's the only time you're by yourself at the basket.

So we got to make them.

But yeah, blocks are really useful.

Making sure it's organized.

Your players will know if you don't have some sort of organization with it, they can feel it, they know.

And then you start to lose them in practice.

So being really organized and strategic about what it is that you're doing is important.

As a coach coming in, how do.

You like to organize it?

In other words, when you're planning a practice, are you sitting down, pen and paper, are you doing a Google Doc or what's your process for actually sitting down and putting that plan together each day?

For me, I have to start off with pen and paper and then I type it out.

Because these practice plans I always like to give a coach on as well.

We also have someone who does the scoreboard.

So I like to run things like a real college level program.

So everything's kind of ran efficiently.

But our manager on, our managers are on the scoreboard.

So all the timing is there.

So every block is timed.

It will have the exact time.

So the manager knows I shouldn't even hear the buzzer, like, time's off, put the next time on so we can go right into the next drill.

So I like to write it out and for me personally writing some things out, sometimes I go back or I think about something else and if I can write it with a pencil, I can erase it or something instead of writing with pen.

But it's always easier for me to write it than type it out and make sure I get it to the coaches.

Yeah, it's interesting.

Everybody always has a different way of kind of putting it together that works for some people and other ways don't work for others.

I'm kind of like you.

I feel like I have to, I have to kind of scribble it out in my own handwriting first and then I can kind of go back and type it out and make it look a little bit organized instead of just me with all these different diagrams and this and that and this play.

I always tell people that one of the things I'm terrible at, nay, is giving names to my drills.

I've always been terrible at it.

Whenever I'm coaching, I'm always like, I'm the guy who, like, wastes practice time, where I'll be like, okay, we're gonna do that drill where, you know, we have two lines here and then we pat.

Instead of just giving the drill a name, I'm always taking 30 seconds to explain.

They're like, all right, we got, you know, we know what.

We know what it is.

I'm like, I should just come up with names for those.

But I've been.

I'm always terrible at that.

But it's.

It's interesting how, again, everybody has a different way of putting together their practice plan to try to maximize, as you said, making sure that you're organized so that it flows from one thing.

Things, to the next.

And clearly, when you're not organized.

And we've all probably been there where there was a practice where it just.

We didn't have it set the way we wanted it to.

And those things deteriorate very, very quickly when you don't know what it is that you want to teach and you're not 100% solid on what you're going to do.

The prep work for practice is.

Is critically important.

And you talked a little bit about using film, right, to prep your team or to look back at the previous game.

How much do you use film with?

I know you're watching a ton of film as coaches, right?

And synergy makes it easy to watch whatever you want of your team and obviously whatever you want of your.

As many games of your opponent as you possibly want to.

But how do you break down the film into chunks so that your players can actually watch it and synthesize it?

How much of what you actually do with the film do you then share with players?

And what's your process for doing that?

So after every game, you know, no matter how late it is, I try to clip the game because what.

I give myself 24 hours to be upset, whether it's a win or loss, right?

And after that, I have to move on because I have to be, you know, better and available for the.

For the girls.

So I only give myself the night to be upset, and so I have to clip it that day.

And every time I clip the game, you know, I usually put.

I type something for the girls.

Can see, you know, we use huddle.

So huddle, it's getting better when it, when it comes to its features.

So you could circle things, you can put, you know, screen positions and you can also send each clip to individual players.

So that has been really helpful.

So I do that almost every game.

Our players love it because they're able to continuously watch it and it goes directly to their email and in their huddle file.

So that's been really good.

But trying to do one on one sessions before games, I feel like sometimes doing film sessions with groups, you know, kids get insecure in certain rooms, Right.

So it can be a little bit more difficult for them to learn.

But putting them in smaller settings, they can kind of see their mistakes, admit their mistakes and move forward a little bit more.

So again, mixing up from small, big to small groups, individual film.

But it is a lot of film.

And teaching kids how to watch film is something that I really try to teach them as well.

Right.

I have a kid who at one point all she saw was her with the basketball, but on the other end she didn't see how she was out of position ever, you know, and how it messed up the whole play.

So teaching kids how to watch film and how to read the game before things happen has been something that I try to do as well.

Yeah, that's a great point.

And it's one that I think we sometimes as coaches forget that a lot of times kids tend to watch games on film of themselves the same way they watch a game on tv.

Right.

They're just watching the ball.

And if it's their game, they're obviously just watching themselves, particularly with the ball, waiting for something good that they did, they can't wait to see that.

And so to be able to teach somebody to watch a, the action that's happening off the ball, whether it's with them or with their teammates.

And as you said, I love the idea of teaching them how to anticipate and look at, well, what, let's freeze it here.

What's about to happen, what should happen, what did happen, and then let's compare the two and then that's when you can really start to learn.

It is incredible just the amount of learning that can be done through film for players.

And I know it's one of the things that again, I've done with my own kids is trying to spend a lot of time with them, just teaching them again how to watch, what to look for.

Like, okay, here's this play.

And yeah, the end result was over here.

But the end result really came about because of what happened over here.

And this is really what you have to see because that's where you can really make a change.

This part that happened over here with the ball, it is what it is.

You weren't trying to miss the shot or you weren't trying to, you know, have somebody reach in and knock it away.

But it's, how did we get to that point and how can we put ourselves in position to be successful, whether it's offensive early or defensively?

And I think you make a tremendous point that I think is really overlooked in that players have no idea how to watch film.

And if you just take them into the film room and start watching it, they're not going to be watching the same thing you're watching unless you're articulating to them what you're actually looking for while you're watching.

I think like the more they do it, the more comfortable they become with their ability to then look at the film and have an understanding.

But just throwing them in the room or saying, hey, go watch this film, they're not going to be watching anything like what you're watching as a coach, that's for sure.

Absolutely.

All right, I want to ask you final two part question before we wrap up and you can take this in whatever direction you want.

So the first part is what do you see as being your biggest challenge?

And you can throw that on the coaching side, you can talk, throw that on the heavy hearted convo side, you can mix and match those together.

But what do you see as being your biggest challenge over the next year or two?

And then the second part is what brings you the most joy about what you get to do each and every day.

And if you forget the first part after you answer the challenge, I'll be, I'll jump back in and tell you the second part.

But the first part.

Biggest challenge.

Biggest challenge.

A really good question.

I will say I don't even know if this makes sense, but you let me know.

But I feel like instead of aiming so high, just try to be perfect at the things or really good at the things that I'm doing now.

I feel like I am someone who completely goes like I believe there are no limits, right?

And that's a good thing.

But there are a lot in my life right now that I could, you know, pay more attention to or give more love to and give more knowledge to and, and put more, put more effort into.

So I would say that's my biggest challenge right now is slowing down, slowing down has always been something that I've been, you know, pretty bad at because I always want to keep going, but slowing down and kind of just being grateful and mindful of what's in front of me right now, even though I want to be the greatest I can be.

Like just being present where my feet are is something that has definitely been.

A challenge for me.

That makes sense.

I mean, I think when you talk about, right, dreaming big and you got all these ideas and you want to chase them and yet you got to be able to execute on the main ideas as you start to try to move to those, those bigger picture ideas.

So I completely understand exactly where you're coming from there.

Execute where you are in the moment and then you can continue to shoot for those dreams, but make sure that you're not neglecting the things that are right there in front of you in the moment.

Makes complete sense.

Second part of the question, what gives you the most joy in what you do?

And again, you can take all the things that you do together.

Answer it however you want, but what brings you the most joy day to day?

When you wake up in the morning,.

Our relationships are really genuine across the board.

Whether it's coaching, heavy hearted combos, the people that I work with, the coaches and mentors that I have, all of my relationships are genuine.

And that's something that I'm, I'm really, really appreciative of.

Like there's, there's.

I would be nothing without the foundation that I have and the relationships that I have because all of them pour into me.

So that's, that's definitely something I would say.

The relationships have been, have been beautiful.

Have been beautiful.

They continue to, they continue to grow and we continue to born to each other.

So the relationships for sure, good stuff.

And it's not a surprising answer based on the conversation that we just had for the last hour.

So clearly the people that are in your life are the ones that you value and the ones that you get a chance to pour into and the ones that have poured into you.

It's easy to see that that's a very important part of who you are and what you do.

Before we wrap up, I want to give you a chance to share how people can connect with you, find out more about what you're doing, share, email, website, social media, whatever you feel comfortable with.

And then after you do that, I'll jump back in and wrap things up.

Gotcha.

So we are on Instagram.

Heavy H combos again.

That's heavy H combos and we are on LinkedIn.

You can find me on LinkedIn and Nasia Lassiter.

The organization also has a LinkedIn page everyhearted combos Inc. We're on Facebook.

Our website is www.heavyheartedconvost.com where you can see our services, you can see all about us, you can see our events, our partners.

You can also just contact me on the page as well where all my contact information is there.

But our website honestly has everything so you can always find us there.

Perfect.

Nay cannot thank you enough for taking the time out of your schedule tonight to join us.

Really appreciate it and to everyone out there, thanks for listening and we will catch you on our next episode.

Thanks.

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