Ghosts on a Train is an Actual Play Podcast taking listeners along on a story filled with danger and comedy. The Line Bulls and Conductor do their best to maintain a balance between the two, but there are times where a listener must beware; as the narrative might suddenly derail to serve one over the other. April 1st is one such time. Pippin's day drinking catches up to him. Drix has an uncomfortable encounter with a familiar face. Andrel gets into the hot tub.

For the full transcript, go to https://ghosts-on-a-train.captivate.fm/episode/totally-ep-25-the-grind-of-duskwall

Ghost Lines by John Harper. Music by Sebastian Black. Art by Yoshiko Agresta. Check out other great Faustian Nonsense Network shows here.

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Drix 0:00

It's been one hell of a week. I sure could use a previously on to catch up on Ghosts on the Train.

Andrel 0:07

Okay, I'm not actually sixteen. You cannot tell anyone! I lied on my resume. I'm telling people that I'm short from age, I'm actually really tall for my age, I'm thirteen.

Pip 0:17

But wait, that's illegal.

Drix 0:18

How did we run out of beans? Somebody tell me how we ran out of beans!

Dunvil 0:23

Alright Andrel, just in case I can't make it. Here's my name tag. You can open the shop for us if I don't make it in that day.

Andrel 0:29

I have school.

Drix 0:30

I just want one day where my ex does not bother me at work.

Drix 0:35

And you're not gonna believe what's coming up next.

Radio Announcer Greg 0:40

The suburban district of Charhallow is blanketed in an all-consuming darkness until an incandescent light spills through glass walls. Like other Duskwall coffee shops, this cafe offers a laid-back space with modern electric charging stations, though a record-switching jukebox occasionally plays when a quarter is dropped inside, an aesthetic anachronism that marks it unmistakably as the Grind of Duskwall. Returning from a day of respite, the baristas and other staff open up the shop for a typical morning. But among the nearby office spaces and college buildings, tired gazes lock onto the closed sign for the moment it turns to reveal the invitation to retrieve their vital caffeine. Customers! Countless number of them, from which the employees make their wage. Should one of these regulars grow bold, what is an overworked barista to do?

Greg 1:53

Hello, welcome back to Ghosts on a Train. This is a podcast we play Ghost Lines, an RPG by John Harper. I am your conductor, Greg.

Hannah 2:03

I'm Hannah, I play Andrel Anderson, certified rascal. I've used that already. But I don't have an endless well of creativity. Get off my dick.

Greg 2:14

Yeah, get off her dick.

Hannah 2:15

Get off my dick.

Guy 2:17

I'm Guy, I play Pip, and he's working through the hangover right now. Normally, it's just implied, but this time it's explicit.

Stefen 2:28

I'm Stefen, I play Drix, and he is just way too tired for work today, actually.

Hannah 2:36

Honestly, same. It's Daylight Savings Time, which is dumb, and that means it's an hour earlier than it actually is and I did not want to wake up for this.

Stefen 2:45

Correct.

Greg 2:48

All right, well, we're just gonna pick up right where we left off. Okay, so Andrel, you're behind the register. There's a, there's kind of long line, and Dunvil still hasn't shown up for his shift. And we, right now we have - oh, we didn't describe the customer last time. We got a particularly mean customer talking to Andrel right now. Does anybody recognize them? And remember, it doesn't have to be like you personally know them. Just something recognizable about this customer.

Guy 3:13

I think they might be...you know, they've got sort of, like, big glasses, kind of long hair just because they've been inside a lot lately, and they're definitely from South America.

Greg 3:28

Is this Adrian?

Guy 3:29

This might be Adrian.

Greg 3:30

Is this our friend, our personal friend -

Hannah 3:32

This is our personal fr - I mean, Adrian -

Guy 3:34

He's not gonna listen to this! Who cares?

Hannah 3:36

- Adrian is kind of mean to me in real life.

Greg 3:39

Oh my god.

Guy 3:40

Adrian is mean to everybody, that's kind of -

Greg 3:41

This is Adrian, our friend who doesn't listen to the podcast.

Guy 3:44

He doesn't listen to podcasts period, so...

Drix 3:47

Hey, hey, that's not true, that's not true. He, he does now.

Guy 3:51

I don't believe you.

Stefen 3:52

He does, because he's, because he's been trained by Yoshiko to art, and the only thing to do while you're arting -

Greg 3:58

Yes!

Stefen 3:58

- is listen to podcasts.

Greg 3:59

Holy crap, Adrian! We - hey! Hey Adrian! Wink! You're here!

Stefen 4:01

He will not listen to our podcast. Let's be real here. But he does listen to podcasts. Eventually he may get desperate enough.

Greg 4:12

Okay, okay, Adrian, you're here, or rather, Jacob Iglesias is here. This is an inside joke that, for nobody listening.

Guy 4:19

Oh my god.

Greg 4:20

Jacob Iglesias. All right. The customer is looking to you, Andrel. He's like -

Adrian 4:27

Listen, I didn't - my croissant sandwich, I ordered it. I'm sure it's on the receipt. Like, how - why am I talking with you?

Andrel 4:34

Okay, can you show me the receipt?

Adrian 4:36

I threw it out real quick because I thought I had all my things!

Andrel 4:40

Okay, well, I don't know, maybe you should've checked first.

Adrian 4:45

How old are you?

Andrel 4:46

Sixteen.

Adrian 4:48

Yeah, okay, can I talk to your manager? Can you get your manager out right now for me?

Andrel 4:52

Sure. Yes, sir.

Greg 4:54

From the back comes a woman with red hair. She's in her 20s, she's got the uniform on, but it looks a little nicer. It's Georgie.

Georgie 5:04

Dinnea fash, Andrel. Listen, sir, I'm her supervisor. We won't have the manager out today. I just understand you got a problem with how Andrel's doing right now?

Greg 5:14

And the customer says -

Adrian 5:17

No, no, no!

Greg 5:18

- slams his fist on the table. That fist slamming, Drix, Pippin. You guys noticed this as well. Right now, I want to know which of you three are going to lead the team against the consumer.

Hannah 5:33

I'm right here.

Greg 5:34

Okay.

Guy 5:35

I feel like this is kind of, like, Andrel taking point.

Greg 5:38

Okay. Okay. So, um, questions, as we normally do. Have you completed your apprenticeship? Yeah, you're an apprentice barista. No, journeyman. No, no, master. You don't, you don't have the support of another, another group. Oh, yeah, what roles are you all? Sorry, I'm so sorry. Are we doing your archetypical roles?

Hannah 5:54

Yeah.

Guy 5:55

Yeah.

Stefen 5:56

Yeah.

Greg 5:57

Okay.

Guy 5:57

I think that makes the most sense.

Greg 5:58

So we do have an Anchor in Pip. We do have a Spider in Andrel and a Rook in Drix. We don't have an Owl, so that's one minus one. So we're currently sitting at zero. Have you worked this shift before, Andrel?

Hannah 6:13

Um, hm.

Greg 6:15

It's, like, the morning shift, right?

Hannah 6:18

Is it, what day the week is it?

Greg 6:21

A Tuesday.

Hannah 6:24

I'm gonna say I probably have on, like, school vacations.

Greg 6:27

Okay, okay.

Hannah 6:28

Or, you know what, I probably cut school regularly.

Greg 6:31

All right, so you don't take a minus one there. Do the other baristas swear to follow your orders without hesitation? Okay, so do, well, you, I'll give you guys time to, like, share, like, a knowing look or something, or like...

Hannah 6:41

We're in this together, fam?

Guy 6:45

I mean, like, Pip is, like, 100% devoted to "the customer is never right", so...

Greg 6:51

Hell yes.

Guy 6:53

Like he's, he's willing to throw hands if it comes to that, but he's probably just gonna throw, like, a fruit tart or something.

Hannah 7:01

All right.

Greg 7:01

Yeah, we've seen that on the last freaking layover, huh?

Stefen 7:09

As, you know, the audience knows, Drix always wants to be hospitable, but you know, hospitality goes both ways, so. It's, uh, it's time to handle stuff.

Greg 7:18

Speaking of hospitality, they were just mean to Georgie, who tried to defuse the situation.

Guy 7:22

Yeah, that's it. That's unacceptable.

Greg 7:25

Like, again, you guys are, you guys are sort of, you're, you're employees here in the Grind of Duskwall. But I, like, you are the players, so, like, certain things you need to deal with. I'm not gonnna have my NPCs do it. That's just how I roll as a, as a GM.

Hannah 7:39

Also, like, look at his stupid face. He looks like a real dick.

Greg 7:44

You hear that, Adrian?

Hannah 7:47

All right, so that's a zero?

Greg 7:49

Yeah, that's a zero. Straight roll.

Hannah 7:50

Okay.

Guy 7:51

Adding Hannah to my list of people I need to high five.

Hannah 7:54

That's a four.

Greg 7:55

Oh, okay, so you don't get to do anything special.

Hannah 7:58

Stupid fucking dice.

Greg 7:59

You can make the opening move, though. Do you want to tether the customer, like, so that way they don't storm out?

Hannah 8:05

Yeah.

Greg 8:05

Yeah, roll finesse to tether the customer.

Hannah 8:07

I'm gonna switch dice.

Greg 8:08

Okay.

Hannah 8:09

I have to take Greg's giant d100 out of the dice bag because it's in the way.

Greg 8:16

It's a good die.

Hannah 8:17

It's not. All right, uh, that's, uh, that's an eleven.

Greg 8:23

Oh, fuck yeah. Okay, so which, which two do you want to do?

Hannah 8:26

I'd like to do it quickly and without compromise.

Greg 8:30

Okay. Yes. Did you have, like, a vision in mind for how you, you get this customer to keep, like, engaging with you?

Hannah 8:37

I'm picturing, like, little Andrel kinda leaning forward across the counter, and she's like -

Andrel 8:41

You know what, I will go talk to our baker and if you just stay right there I'm sure she can get you that croissant sandwich real quick.

Adrian 8:55

All right. All right. I've already been here. I've already been here for a while, but I guess, you know, if...I, I'll just have to wait double the time for my croissant sandwich to go through that stupid toaster again.

Andrel 9:05

Well...

Adrian 9:06

I thought you'd do it with the hashbrowns, but whatever.

Andrel 9:08

It'll be worth it.

Greg 9:11

All right. The customer, so, so Andrel, presumably you're going off to talk to Greta.

Hannah 9:16

Yeah.

Greg 9:17

Who's working, who's working baking things.

Hannah 9:19

Greta, please help me.

Greg 9:20

At the moment, Pip, Drix, the customer is sort of, like, he's like, tapping his foot, and he's giving, like, nasty looks at, giving nasty looks at Georgie. You see he's starting to rile up the other people in the line because it's a pretty long line, and, like, at the moment this does kind of reflect poorly on you guys rather than just this guy being a dick, because the whole line's being held up. Any action from you guys?

Stefen 9:47

Yeah. I think Drix saunters up to him and is like -

Drix 9:51

Hey, I'm, I'm really sorry that this has been such a rough morning, and we, you know, we will do everything in our power to correct it. Now, if you wouldn't mind, would you just please step over here for a moment?

Greg 10:03

Oh, nice, nice, nice. So you're going to, you're going to tear him loose from the, like, the customer, like, line, right?

Stefen 10:08

Yeah.

Greg 10:09

Yeah, yeah, go ahead and roll force for me.

Stefen 10:11

Awesome.

Guy 10:13

I should have grabbed my dice. I'm a fool.

Drix 10:17

All right, that would be a nine.

Greg 10:20

Excellent, excellent, excellent. Which one do you want to do?

Stefen 10:25

Um, I think I want to create an opportunity.

Greg 10:29

Okay, I was gonna say, that's, that's probably, that's probably exactly what you're doing. So yeah, you, you get him, and at first he's, like, all indignant, but then you saw it, saw it off with the okay, maybe you should step aside. And he's like -

Adrian 10:39

Yeah, I guess I have nothing else to do today. I guess I'll, yeah, I'll get out of the way.

Hannah 10:45

Then what are you complaining about?

Greg 10:47

And Georgie, Georgie, mouths little thank you and then goes -

Georgie 10:53

I can take the next customer, please, while the, while the barista's over that way.

Greg 10:56

And yeah, she starts, she starts to sort of, like, ring people up. Pip, you see Greta, Greta is currently, she's got a big collection of food that she needs to give to a delivery person at the moment. Andrel's trying to get her attention but she's, like, really focused on this. Do you wanna do anything?

Guy 11:16

I think Pip's, Pip's been, like, working here, and he knows the back of the shop well enough, I think. He could, he could probably just sort of, like, take care of this, and just get, like, one of the, like, the frozen ones, or like, maybe one of the day old ones, just because, like, honestly, fuck this guy.

Hannah 11:32

Fuck this guy! Fuck you, Adrian!

Stefen 11:34

Fuck this guy!

Guy 11:37

Look, you put it through the toaster, no one can even tell, like, anyway. Like, who gives a shit? So Pip's gonna just, like, push it through the toaster, just like, real quick, just like, bing bang boom.

Greg 11:48

Hell yeah. What kind of roll do you think that'd be?

Guy 11:51

That's a very good question.

Greg 11:54

It could be, like, insight to find the right frozen things, or, like, honestly, I could see it being steel to just, like, to just be like, yeah, yeah, I got you the frozen one.

Guy 12:06

Yeah, no, I think -

Hannah 12:07

Look this man in the eyes and tell him this is a fresh croissant sandwich.

Guy 12:10

Yeah, Pip's gonna do exactly that.

Greg 12:13

Which one, which one don't want to do?

Guy 12:17

I think panic, disengage, or flee. I want Pip to just, like, stare him in the eyes, just like, here's your fresh sandwich, sir.

Greg 12:25

Yeah, yeah, go ahead and roll for me.

Guy 12:28

I'm gonna have to steal some -

Stefen 12:29

Go for it.

Guy 12:32

I'm actually gonna use one of the chocolate covered espresso beans to give myself plus one.

Greg 12:37

Very good, very good. Oh,...