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How to turn your life around aka from homelessness to success with Dr Robb Kelly
Episode 6416th October 2021 • Success Inspired • Vit Müller
00:00:00 00:50:46

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My guest today is a world renowned addiction expert who believes addiction is a thinking problem not a drinking problem or using problem. He has helped over 6,000 people ranging from celebrities to everyday people who want to live in sustained sobriety and recovery.

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Highlights:

  • [00:00:57] The roots of Robb's alcoholism problem
  • [00:02:30] When Robb stabbed his wife over vodka
  • [00:05:18] Losing family and Robb's journey to homelessness
  • [00:13:41] Robb's past playing at Abbey Road with all the famous musicians
  • [00:16:08] So how did Robb turn his life around ?
  • [00:21:02] Power of positive psychology and conscious decision to achieve greater things in life
  • [00:24:31] Everybody is capable of achieving more in life
  • [00:38:33] Story about Robert Downey Jr
  • [00:48:15] 3 Take away point

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Transcripts

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Welcome to the Success Inspired Podcast, a business and personal development

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podcast to help you accomplish more in life and realize your true potential.

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And now here is your host Vit Muller

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Hello everybody, welcome to another episode on a Success Inspired Podcast.

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My guest today is a world renowned addiction expert who believes

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addiction is a thinking problem not a drinking problem or using problem.

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He has helped over 6,000 people ranging from celebrities to

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everyday people who want to live in sustained sobriety and recovery.

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Please.

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Welcome to the show Dr.

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Rob Kelly.

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Thank you Vit, good to be here.

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Absolutely great to be here.

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Great to have you on the show, mate.

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So eventually you should a little bit, but what's something that a

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lot of people don't know about.

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well, they call me the addiction doctor because I specialize in addiction.

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I started drinking at the age of nine and I have a chronic alcohol problem.

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I've not drank for some time now, but yeah, it ruined my life.

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Really my children's life.

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and you know, the ups and downs of alcohol.

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I took my first drink at the age of nine on stage with my musical family

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and the, you know, the stories are horrendous leading to homelessness

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and then back to where I am today.

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So the journey has been wild, absolutely wild.

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And my book goes into that.

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It's like a lows of the lows, highs of the highs then back lows of the lows

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again, and then I ended up here so.

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I'm in San Antonio, Texas.

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Although I'm originally from Manchester United Kingdom.

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I've been in Texas for about 14 years now.

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And I love me some Texas.

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So what led to that?

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I mean, musical family, was it, was it the surrounding, like you said,

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started drinking at nine years old,

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I've started drinking at nine.

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My uncle gave me a beer, between sets one and two and, . I took them.

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the beer and wow!

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It was just amazing.

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Made me feel good.

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And it gave me loads of confidence.

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So, every time we played Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I would, I would

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start drinking and it was just, you know, probably half a glass of beer.

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That's all.

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But it was enough to get me rocking and rolling and, you

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know, having a great time.

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So that's why I did, I wasn't drinking alcoholically then alcohol was working

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for me throughout many, many years, including high school and college.

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And then probably when I got married to my wife and had two kids, that's

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when it started to turn on me and really things went really wrong for me.

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What happened?

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Well, when I got married, I, I was drinking heavily when I got married,

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but, There's a couple of things I'm not proud of, but one of them was that I

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was drinking alcoholically and I woke up at two or three in the morning,

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four o'clock and come downstairs to the kitchen to find some vodka.

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And I found it and I put it on the side.

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Of the kitchen counter for a second while I turned around and got a crystal glass.

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And as I did, my wife had quietly followed me downstairs and she snatched

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the bottle of vodka from the counter and she held it against the chest and

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she says, I think you've had enough now.

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She was probably right, because I've been drinking all the time when I was due to

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go to work in about four hours time.

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So what I should have said is, thank you Mrs.

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Kelly, and go back to bed.

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Unfortunately, what I did was took a kitchen knife out and stabbed her three

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times and she went to the floor bleeding.

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I got my bottle of vodka, finished it off, call a taxi call the police.

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And, the taxi rank was just literally around the corner.

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So he pulled up within a minute and I waited so that I could hear the sirens.

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I jumped in the taxi cab and I fled to Spain.

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And I staid in Spain Uh, for some time, until they promised and signed contracts,

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legal documents that I would not be charged with the attempted murder.

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it's pretty bad, but I wasn't the worst.

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It got worse than that.

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Got a lot worse than that when I lost my children and that was the most

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devastating devastation part of my life.

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But it happened, you know, after, after the stabbing incident, we

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lived in this beautiful house, very, very large `house, brand new cars

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you know, my business was thriving.

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And, when I came up from Spain, Literally on the day I flew back, I got a taxi back

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home and as I walked in to the door.

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She had, three suitcases packed and the children ready to go.

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And as I walked in to the door She said to me, he said, Rob, I love

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you to the day I die but you're not going to kill our kids.

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And then she left and I was so angry.

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I was screaming at her the children was there and it's

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probably ages one and three.

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Nick could hear this going on.

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So I in a drunken rage call my attorneyand and threatened him if he

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didn't get my kids back within 24 hours.

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That I wasn't going to do any business with him.

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And we did a lot of money with this guy.

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So he went to court and somehow the next day he turned up with my children.

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He got some sort of court order worked in my favor and I got my children back.

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So I remember taking them into the living room.

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I give this guy, a big check for doing what he did and I bought

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into the living room and I was so proud that I could be dad.

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Right.

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Cause I knew nobody was taking him them of me.

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That was it.

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You don't do that to me, cause I will retaliate.

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And what happened was I sat in front of the TV, went into the

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kitchen and I thought, wouldn't it be great if I just had one drink to

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celebrate the children coming back.

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And then three days later, The police bust the door down.

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I had no idea between them three days, I'd been drinking solidly.

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My children had not been fed or, or changed diapers for two days.

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And, they served unfit father papers and neglect and all

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that stuff it had in there.

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And then they grabbed my two children.

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And mom got a three-year-old old and they start to walk down the path and everybody

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was crying and it was a sad state.

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And my daughter said three things to me, she said, daddy, daddy, please don't go.

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And she walked further down the park she turned around again, and she

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says, daddy, daddy, please get better.

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And as she got to the gate and opened the gates she turned around

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one more final time and she says, daddy, daddy, please stop drinking.

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And I couldn't do it.

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I just couldn't do it.

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I went back in the house.

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I open another bottle of vodka.

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I remember roundabout three, four.

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I don't know how long it was.

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Maybe two, three months later I was homeless.

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The house had gone.

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The cars had gone, my kids had gone, the wife had gone, the license

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have gone the business closed down.

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I went from that house to my mom's house.

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Lasted three days at my mom's house.

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She threw me out because of my drinking.

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Went to friends from friends and acquaintances and from acquaintances,

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living on the streets, slept in a bus shelter the first night that

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my, my acquaintance threw me out.

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and then I went to the middle of Manchester is like a garden

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then they'll benches and us.

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I stayed there for 14.

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Nobody would speak to me.

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Nobody.

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When I called home, he put the phone down on me, so it was abandoned on the streets.

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And, and then my first night thinking, what the hell just happened?

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Why did all that go wrong?

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Because I'm the guy that played the Abbey road.

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I'm the guy, that's friends with Elton John, Bowie, Queen, all them guys.

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You know, I remember that, at Elton John's house once with a couple of

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other famous guys and we laughed and we looked at each other and Elton said,

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where did, where did we all go wrong?

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And it was kind of funny cause they were all rich.

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but I had that thought again when I was on the streets

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because I didn't have anything.

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I had no.

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nothing to my name.

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I had to beg for alcohol.

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And when I couldn't, I couldn't beg for money to get alcohol,

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then I'd go and steal it.

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So I got arrested a few times and just drunk and disorderly, and, you

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know, vagrants and stuff like that.

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I got picked up.

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So yeah, it was, it wasn't, it wasn't good.

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And, and the way I survived back then was I went down.

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I would beat people up after nightclubs to get money.

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I'd rubbed the wallets.

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And I'd do anything for alcohol.

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My life was a 14 month alcohol binge.

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I never came out of and suicide attempts, six suicide attempts

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on two occasions as succeeded.

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And they, the EMT has brought me back to life again, which I was really annoyed

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about, because it wasn't a cry for help.

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I wanted to kill myself.

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I couldn't live anymore.

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And, yeah.

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Life was pretty bad then.

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Wow, I'm lost for words

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I know many, many people wow when they see me, a lot of people

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heard of me, obviously, not a lot of people know who I am.

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When you sit down.

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I did a, I did a charity thing the other day for veterans and first responders.

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And I tell my story in the room is shocked because I look at what I do

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today, you know, and how famous I am if famous is a word, I don't know,

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but how recognized I am with my TV and my books and all that stuff I do.

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But when you sit down and tell them the story, everyone's reaction is like yours,

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but silence it's like the first time it happened, I'm like, you guys scare anybody

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or people are just like, oh my God.

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You know?

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And it's just crazy, crazy.

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Well, so yeah.

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What was it?

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What was the main premise of your addiction?

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Because you said that, you know, your uncle gave you a

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sip of beer when you were nine.

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So it was more like a, just for pleasure, like just, it gave you confidence.

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It wasn't to deal with any, any issues.

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Right.

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was that the main reason why you kept going, because it was helping you with the

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confidence, or what was the trigger for you later on and why did you keep going?

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Well, what happens is since I came up the street for the

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last, I dunno, how many years?

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20 - 30, I've been studying the alcoholic brain and the addicted

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brain and alcoholism as a whole and become a specialist at it.

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Neuroplasticity and neuroscience is what I studied today.

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So going back, I was born an alcoholic.

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So alcoholics are born.

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You can't drink enough alcohol to make you an alcoholic.

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You may abuse alcohol, but an alcoholic is not somebody who drinks too much alcohol.

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And people are amazed by that.

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So I'm born this way.

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It's a predisposition passed down from my parents, might skip a gen.

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It skipped my generation with my brother.

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Didn't touch him at all, but me.

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I got it.

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So the first time I saw Al my body, it was only a matter of

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time before it all went wrong.

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So alcohol worked for a long time.

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A real long time and gave me so much confidence.

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I was like 15, 16 when I went for the job at Abbey road and

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people are laughing at me.

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It's like this kid walks in with this huge guitar and you have all

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these veteran bass players waiting to audition for this perceived position.

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And I don't give a shit.

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I was like half drunk, walked in, cocky, sat down and got my guitar.

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I played with the stuff they told me to play and then manuscripts and

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then just, just left and went home.

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And I did that seven times and finally got the job.

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You know, so alcohol really was working for me a lot of times through college and

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then, you know, I'd mixed with cocaine and Speed, Amphetamin and, yeah, I, I

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tried coming off alcohol for a month.

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I'd use amphetamines and cocaine, and then it makes you have a drug problem.

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So I went back to alcohol for a few years and it just bounced back.

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So I'm, I was, I was hooked from the first.

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So it's really interesting how the brain works because, because we're born this

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way, our brain is, well, my brain is allergic to the ethanol and alcohol,

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you know, whereas drug addicts, they have to take certain amounts of drugs.

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They like.

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Then they become addicted to it and the addiction and alcoholism show up

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the same, but it's not quite the same.

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So a little tiny difference.

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It doesn't mean treatment differs or 12 step groups, doesn't differ.

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That's not talking about that.

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I'm talking about the precise change with the, with the ethanol and the, my brain

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being rematched, especially from trauma.

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Every alcoholic has trauma period.

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Not even going to argue with anybody about that six and a half thousand patients

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down the line, I can categorically say that every alcoholic has trauma.

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So the trauma mixed with mind disposition that's been passed on to me.

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I'd never stood a chance.

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It was always going to end up homeless, always or jail for life.

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How I didn't kill anybody.

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I don't know.

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I battered people, I stabbed people.

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You know when I was on the streets just to survive.

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So, you know, I could have quite easily ended up in.

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prison for the rest of my life.

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In fact, there was one crazy time when I was actually thinking of killing

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somebody, because I had nowhere to go they put me in jail first and I laugh.

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They Lisa's got some food every day.

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I mean, the thoughts of the crazy thoughts that went through your head,

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what that, that 14 months is just crazy.

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You watch a life going on around you and you just start and people

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walk over you and spits at you.

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And you know, when you ask for money, they're nasty to you.

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I mean, it's just horrible.

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I kept saying, gee, how do you know, do you know who I am?

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And I get with all these drugs and homeless people and go, Hey, you know, I'm

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a doctor and they would laugh like crazy.

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They would laugh like crazy.

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It's not how I'm trying to be doctor.

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So, you know, . I'm going to, I'm going to go down.

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I'm going to do this, that, and they laughed and laughed.

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and then when I told them I play with it while he's famous, , they laughed and

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laughed because of course it wasn't true.

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As far as they're concerned, I was just another bum on the streets, but had

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done all of a sudden amazing things, but alcoholism still took it away.

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Let's let's start it on a positive here a little bit, because this is all very

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dark and gloomy and, very shocking.

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when I was preparing for this interview, I know you send me a bio and, and

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about what you do now, and you've kind of hinted on what, what your past was

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but I had no idea how, how bad it was.

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So, I definitely want to talk to you about how did you get through all

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that, but, before we get to that,

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I'm also curious, what was that job like in, in Abbey road?

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I loved it.

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I passed the audition and, you know, I'd play maybe four times a week.

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So in case people don't know the way session musicians work is usually

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you're stepping in for a bass player, guitar player, whatever mine was bass.

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So you step in for a bass player when he was sick or ill or

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what tends to happen in those.

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Is the band would be would be given like, I don't know, half a million

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dollars to produce the first single or album they'd go out and do that.

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It Hits the charts.

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They would get the first paycheck.

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Now when it comes to making the second album, you know,

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Johnny was drunk all the time.

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Billy's overdosed on heroin.

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So they would bring session, players into lay the tracks now.

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So I would go in many times, I wouldn't see whose song it was, but I remember,

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you know, when, when, when, Freddie Mercury came in, and we did some tracks

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together and you never know what it is.

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You just do your tracking piece.

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They'll give you music, your bass part, and you just play it.

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but we, we spent, we spent many early morning times drinking coffee and talking

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about life It was absolutely phenomenal, but most of the time I'm drunk or wasted,

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so I didn't really appreciate it, back then, but it was a prestigious job.

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I never thought of it like that, I just thought it was another

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job, anybody can do this.

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I didn't appreciate because I don't think it did when you, when you, when you're a

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kid, you know, when you're under 21, it's just like, things were meant to happen.

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You go through them, you don't appreciate them until they get older.

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You go, wow.

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So.

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annoying person would be Elton John when he gets in his moods.

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The most amazing person would be, Freddie is one of the most

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amazing persons I've ever seen.

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and yeah, it was just amazing.

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I was going to college as well.

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The money from that put me through college because no one in our

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family had gone to college before.

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So I was the first.

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I went to Oxford, you know, it an, all this money.

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I joined the Freemasons an early age because they need an organist and it's

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like, all my life was going amazing.

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But yeah, it was good.

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And everything, since that, there's been a lot of ups and downs, but most of the

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time my life has took off like crazy.

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No matter what I send my hand to usually it works.

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That would have been amazing with all these musicians.

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Imagine, imagine where you could have been if, you know,

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if you didn't end up on street.

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If you didn't.

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Yeah.

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If, if what happened, didn't happen.

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But if, if we've right, well, let's not worry about that.

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Let's talk about future and let's talk about how did

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you, how did you overcome it?

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How did you turn your, turn your life around?

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Well, I'm on the streets after the 13 months is pouring down with rain and just

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coming out of an alcoholic binge, but I don't have any alcohol it's past midnight.

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it's around two, three o'clock in the morning.

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And I strolled across the backend of Manchester, United Kingdom and the

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people at where nobody goes, it's just a dark road with cobblestones on.

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And I dropped to my hands and knees and I started crying, you know,

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like a baby from my stomach pain.

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And my stomach was horrible.

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I remember looking into this.

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I'm never a religious person, but I just said, if there's a God up there,

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can't do this on my own anymore.

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And about 30 seconds later, a guy walked around the corner, he'd miss

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his last bus home from a Bible study.

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And he bumped into me.

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He said, can I help you?

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And I said, yeah, I'm dying.

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And he took me back to his house.

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He happened to be an alcoholic and he took me back and he said,

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Hey, I've been where you are.

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You can stay there for as long as you are.

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Well, just want to get you well and help you.

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And that's where I'm at.

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My journey started.

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To where I am today.

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Just like everything was meant to be like, you know, I got in that house.

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And then after I met this other guy in a 12 step room and he said he would

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take me through some programs and this great book, to educate myself.

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And he told me that I need never drink again.

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And my life could be amazing sort of clung onto this guy.

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And we went through the stuff and.

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He said your life's going to change from now on your life's going to change after I

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went there for about eight weeks, I think every Wednesday night and sure enough,

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after I finished with them, I got a part-time job turned into a full-time job.

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Then somebody at the place gave me a car and then car, it wasn't amazing,

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but it was enough to get me to work.

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And back then I moved into a a really nice, it was like sober house.

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And then from there I got an apartment and, just started

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building and building and then.

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I'm speaking to this girl, you know, early kind of internet chat rooms.

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And, we started talking and she was in Dallas, Texas, which I

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thought was really glamorous.

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Cause I'd seen the Dallas TV program years ago, so we're chatting away and, and then

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she just said, Hey, my local church, you know, there's a big crack cocaine problem.

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Would you ever think of coming over for like four days and doing some seminars?

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I said, yeah, I'd love to.

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So she arranged that.

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So they got, we got the date and everything, and I

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had the tickets have ready.

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And about a week before I was about to come and stay packing my stuff slowly

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but surely as I washed it, I packed it.

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I got my, passport out on an expired by about five, six

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days I was like, holy gold.

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No.

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So I didn't call her cause I was panicked and embarrassed.

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So I got down to Liverpool, which is 35 mile drive and I took it to the

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passport office and he looked at it and he said, do you want to expediting?

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So I was saying, yeah, I need it in like six days.

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And he said, oh, no, expedites in is about four weeks.

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It's normally 12 weeks, but we can get it through fast in four weeks.

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So I just, I didn't know what to do.

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So I just said, okay, I'll pay the money and that's it.

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And I went back home and I was supposed to fly on a Saturday

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and this was like the Tuesday.

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And I was so scared of calling her or getting on the chat room

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with her to say, I couldn't come.

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And then the day before I was supposed to fly.

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So the Friday, there was a knock at the door and my passport arrived.

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So when I locked back, all them things started to happen to me.

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And I came over here for two or three, four days only.

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And when I put my foot down on American soil at Dallas international airport,

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DFW, I knew I was never going to go home.

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And that's what happened.

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They got all my licenses stopped over to America and we started a practice in

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Dallas, Texas, and never looked back.

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And that was about 14 years ago.

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But when she reached out to you, you were already doing this type of stuff

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or was it just kind of as a result of her talking to you and you talking to

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her about how you've overcome addiction?

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I was kind of already doing it, but not full time.

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I was only doing a part-time basis, had another job to pay the real bills.

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But yeah, our story was, she was married to an alcoholic before the divorce.

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So that's how the conversation started.

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But, you know, I did have a little bit of a reputation, nothing like it is

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now, but it was just, I guess it was some sort of calling or something I

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was on, but you know, best thing I ever did, if it wasn't from speaking to that

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lady, Um I would never be here cause I never dream of coming over to America.

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I'd never been to America.

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The furthest I'd been from our country, England was Spain and

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that's like an hour and a half away.

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I wouldn't even dream of traveling 12.

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It used to be 12 hours all them years ago.

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Now they do it in nine, I think, but I wouldn't even

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dream of doing that, but I did.

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And I'm here.

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So.

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You were saying, like you wanted to, you wanted to do something about the

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alcoholism and about the drug addiction problem and you kept cycling through

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when it was too much drug addiction, you went back to alcoholism and, and,

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obviously it sounded like you kind of wanted to do something about it, but,

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but in a way it was, it sounds like it was also thankfully due to the,

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the, the series of events that have.

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Meeting meeting that is that priest meeting that guy on a street.

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Let's call him a priest.

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I'm not sure if he was a priest, but let's call him priest.

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and then, and then she to that girl in Dallas and then that sort of opened

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up the door for what you do now.

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I'm sure there'll be a lot of listeners right now.

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That might be, you know, where you were before, perhaps, you know, thinking

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about this as, you know, like, it sounds like you kind of got lucky, you know,

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Well, I guess some breaks will be good, but I've, I've, also studied, a little bit

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of quantum physics, you know, due to the alcoholic brain and I can categorically

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stand and say to you that if you want something bad enough, it happens.

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So whatever you can visualize in your mind, you can hold in your hand.

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That's a guaranteed fact, but people then dream that they don't even think that,

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oh, I want to say to people, if you, if you're sat at home and you're thinking.

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You're a piece of crap or you're never going to amount to anything,

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or this is your lot in life.

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I want to apologize to you because somebody put that there.

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We're not born this way.

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We're born with million dollar minds yet.

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We tend to hang around 10 cent mines.

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It's like, if you want it bad enough, you'll get it.

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If you want information about recovery, you'll get it.

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If you want to earn $60,000 a year, and you're only earning 20

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right now, start hanging around the guys that earned 60 grand a year.

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All these things, quantum physics and.

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And the way the world is in the universe, it all works in a certain way.

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And to crack that code, it's just amazing.

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I mean, I've worked with six and a half thousand people since doing this job.

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And most of them that I know have gone on to lead an amazing life because you

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know, whether you believe in God or the universe or something, something that is

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looking out after each and every one of us, it's got nothing to do with religion.

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You know, it's a spiritual path, but if you, if you realize that and then

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start acting like we should, you know, being kind to another human

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band, always help when you can, always say kind words, do work on yourself,

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especially your childhood trauma.

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And when you get through the, all that things start to happen really quick,

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because that's what happened to me.

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The guy, I finally went through the work with who I walked to see every

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Wednesday evening for eight weeks.

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When I, when I finally finished with him.

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About one or two weeks after that, I got my first paycheck.

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I got a little Teddy bear and a card and I walked back to that man's house.

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Like I've been doing for eight weeks.

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And when I got back, there was nobody.

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And I bang that door on the apartment and the next next lady come out and the next,

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next door to me, he says, can I help you?

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I said, can you tell me where John relocated to?

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And she said, there's been known in an apartment for at least six months.

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I've been here.

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So we're onto the other side and not at this guy, what sort of door?

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And I said, Hey, got a loony tunes next door.

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She doesn't remember.

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I came here for about eight weeks.

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Do you remember.

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And he said, John, there's been no one, that name living here.

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I know that apartment has been empty for at least a year

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and I could never trace him.

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You see, I wanted it bad enough.

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And whoever is looking after me, I call it God looking after me sent

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me the right people when I wanted

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but if you're happy sitting at home, not doing anything with your life and

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struggling for money and stuff like that, you're never going to get any help.

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No one's going to come to the door and knock on your door and go,

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Hey, there's a hundred thousand dollar job that you can have.

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You have to go out and seek it.

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And everybody is capable of seeking it.

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You see, there's no difference between me on the streets and, and, and me

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now, the only difference is the guy on the street wanted this badly.

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You look up around your city, , you see these big CEOs earning million dollars

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a year, the only difference between you and him is he wants it better than you.

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It's got nothing to do with education.

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Colleges is not a college degree, does not get you a hundred

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grand a year job these days.

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. You know, I know people with doctorates, you know, and masters that are working

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at Kentucky fried chicken, and McDonald's I mean, it's how bad you want it.

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The world is at our fingertips right now, especially with everyone's online.

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Especially through COVID, you know, this is the time to shine.

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This is the time when you can turn your computer into a million dollar business.

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Instead of saying, I want to build a company, why don't you start saying to

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yourself, I want to build an empire.

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Because that's where the thought patterns comes and then neuro pathways will

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be firing, ready to go because most alcoholics are born with self-sabotage

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in neural pathways, which means I could go for a week, a month, sometimes even a

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year building up this business and making this brand outlook for each feature.

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And then I go on a series of, of sprees and drunken episodes

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and, and ruin everything.

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You know, the most self care neuro pathways we have in our brain, the better

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chance we stand of becoming a success.

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And then of course, Vit you've got to look at what is success?

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Is success working a nine to five job looking at my family?

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Yes.

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Is success getting my children back for the weekend of my wife?

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Yes.

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All these little journeys and all these little wins that we have, you must take

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advantage of them and realize there's always somebody worse off than you.

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When I was on the streets, there was people worse off than me.

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I saw people on the streets.

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Who couldn't walk.

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They would be wheelchaired.

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I saw surgeons on the street.

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. Because of alcohol, like real, real heart surgeons, you know?

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And, you know, they, they, they just lost everything because of alcohol.

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But if you want it bad enough, it'll come.

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That's how the universe works.

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It's like, if you convince yourself like internal dialogue

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is very important for success.

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If I drop a pen on the floor, I used to say, oh what a stupid idiot.

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Stop saying that because your brain, the subconscious brain will take that.

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Just like your parents said, stop doing that.

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You'll never be clever enough.

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No, you can't go to college Robb.

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You're not as clever as your brother.

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You know, all this stuff that we take in as teenagers, we tend

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to carry on through adult life.

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I've dropped a pen on the floor.

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I'm not a stupid idiot.

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. I've just dropped a pen on the.

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my head am I so concentrating?

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We'll take the end.

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And now we go with new neural pathways, healthy ones.

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So when the rubber hits the road and I want to self-sabotage, there are

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more healthy neuro-pathways and there are billions, the neuros of sabotage,

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and that's one of the keys to success.

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You can have anything you want.

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Don't let anybody tell you any different.

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I came from the project from the counselors.

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I was the, I was the kid that waved the school bus off.

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Cause they were going on a camping trip, four miles away at the local park.

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But my mom and dad couldn't afford to pay for me to go.

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Trauma PTSD from that.

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I am that guy and look at me today and I'm actually waving a flag

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for anybody who's been left behind anybody that that's a trauma as a kid,

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anybody is living on the poverty line.

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That's not the way you do it guys, come on.

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We all know we can do this.

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It's easy.

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Once you get in mind, just find out, find out the why and how will come by.

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Not the why.

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What's your, why?

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My, why is I want it to spread the news of addiction and

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alcoholism and joy to everybody that I meet and it came America.

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Here we go.

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Boom.

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The last program I was on went to 18 million people.

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That's a big platform.

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And that's what I, that's why I want to, when I came and I surround

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myself by the right people, when I first came to America, I had a couple

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of friends that weren't any good, but I didn't know any different.

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And I said to them, well, I want to, I want to, I was thinking of writing a book.

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And they were like, there's no way, I'm sorry, but there's no

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way you're not going to do it.

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So I left it for a few years, but when it comes to San Antonio six,

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I don't know how long ago it was.

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I surround myself with a bunch of guys and I said, one day, you know,

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we're all drinking coffee, thinking of writing a book and their reply was, wow.

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We thought you'd already wrote one.

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That's a great idea.

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So it's the people, you know, show me your friends, I'll show you a future

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That whole rewiring your brain.

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I'm a firm believer and it's, it's so great to hear it from you as well.

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Like just to strengthen that message because, it is absolutely true.

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It's it's it's the moment you, You refocus your thoughts to do

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something more positive, right?

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That's going to shift your actions.

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It's going to shift your circumstances, but it doesn't happen overnight, right?

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Like if you're talking about how you're wired, like how you're wired

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towards, let's say self-sabotage.

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That's literally like your neurons fire towards that.

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So that's what always triggers those thoughts.

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So if you want to change that, it's kinda like, I think I've said

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the analogy in the podcast before.

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I would say, think about it like a highway, right?

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As a, as a, as a highway and as, as, as a, as a thick traffic and

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you're stuck in that traffic.

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and you have to move along the same way, like the rest of the traffic.

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And that's kind of where you are now.

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In order to change that you kind of need to create a new path.

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She kind of have to break through the breakthrough to what do you

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call those things on the side of the road, those barriers barriers, right?

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I have to break through the barriers and imagine there's a thick Bush around

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those on either side of the road.

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So you cannot drive there the first time you're going to drive in, into that Bush.

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You know, you gotta, you're gonna have to like cut through some trees.

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and it's going to be hard.

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But behind you, you've already cleared a little bit of a path.

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So the next time you're going to go in there again, you're gonna

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clear up a little bit more of the path and then keep going.

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All right.

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Maybe you've got a machete.

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You can keep chopping the bushes and keep going forward.

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It clearing that path.

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And sooner than later, as you keep going further and further, like chipping

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away just a little bit by bit behind you, stuff starts to grow start to,

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you know, start to grow behind you.

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So it's going to be hotter and how to come back.

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That's kind of how I think about like pathways, like more, you

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stay focused on the positive.

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The other wires starts to disconnect.

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Yeah, we are.

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We have a way of pointing its repetition, strengthen and confirms.

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The more you do it, the easier you become it's like being a

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pilot or something like 50,000.

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I don't know how many hours are needed to fly a jumbo jet or something.

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Get the Alison, get the neuro-pathways flying.

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It's like, you gotta be careful what you seeand what you do.

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So if you're doing healthy neural pathways, if you're cutting off and

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going through the bush every single day than the path becomes normal.

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So even sometimes when you come on that freeway and it's not that busy, your

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normal path would be off to the side.

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Cause you know, that works it's quicker and it's safe.

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So the more we use it, the more, the more we get, but we have to

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watch what we see and what we have.

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I'll give you a quick example right now.

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It's like,

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if people are saying the wrong things around you, you're going to take that in.

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So if you hang around nine depressed people, you will become the number 10.

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You know, it's simple as that.

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So what I'll say to everybody listening now real quickly, is

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concentrate for a second and I'm going to ask you not to do something.

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Please do not do it.

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Whatever happens.

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Don't think of an elephant, damn it, all thought of an elephant.

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That's how that's how easy it is to convince someone

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that they're not any good.

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They're a waste of time and they'll never amount to anything.

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You only got to look at the past.

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The superstars I've passed away from one or two comments to go from the carpenters.

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Somebody says she was fun.

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Next minute she died of anorexia.

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You know, we've got to take in the good thing.

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Repetition strengthen and confirms.

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You have to realize how powerful you are.

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Every human being can be a powerful force and power to do amazing stuff,

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but it's what people tell us, you know, you never be any good, blah, blah, blah.

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And they don't really mean it.

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The abandonment, the shame, the guilt, the trauma that we carry

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as a child and parents don't mean to do it, but they do it.

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Everybody does.

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So when you get older, it's about going back and doing that work, getting back

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to the scene of the crime as we call it and make sure that you clear all that

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stuff up, you're clearly abandon it all.

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Where we live in a million dollar house.

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One patient said, I said, how often do you see your dad?

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Or just Sunday for an hour?

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Why always working all the time?

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That's abandonment, that's PTSD.

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You're going to carry for rest your life.

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And every single time, especially women, no relationships has ever worked.

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Because dad used to leave, all week apart from an hour.

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So it fucks with relationships, it involves our success.

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I met Arnold Schwarzenneger back in 1979, and He just released, an

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underground movie called Pumping Iron.

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And he was doing a little seminar in England and I was a

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semi-professional bodybuilder at the time.

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So.

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and a couple of others were chosen to go and pick them up from the airport and

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show him his hotel and just stay with him.

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Keep his company.

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I got into some serious talks with Arnold, even though his English were very broken.

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He came from the Grass in Austria, very broken, but he said three things

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to me that always stuck in my mind.

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And I said, what, what's the future for you Arnold?

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I mean, this bodybuilding is good, but it's not enough.

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You can't make any money out of it.

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And he says, I don't intend to , but I, one day I want to be the highest paid

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movie actor in the world, but we kind of smiled and embarrassed and thinking

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the guy can't even speak English.

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You know what?

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Nevermind movie star.

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Check.

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Then he said to us, I want to be a governor of a state,

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preferably California.

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We started laughing even more.

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Check.

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And then he said to us, the final thing that made us burst out laughing.

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He said he wanted to marry into the Kennedy family.

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Check.

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All these things that he did.

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He put his mind to.

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You have to realize how powerful we are as human beings and individuals.

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I remember him having a Ferrari once and he pulled up.

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I didn't, well, it wasn't within this story.

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I know to be true.

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He pulled up at a traffic lights and some kids pulled in a normal car wreck

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trying to race him, and as they sped off with squealing, it just took off

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at five miles an hour and carried on and he stayed his message from that

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was if you know how powerful you are, you don't have to prove it to anybody.

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Just to make things happen.

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You want to be rich, you know, it's like a basketball court quantum physics.

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I can be 25 places at the same time on that court.

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It's quantum physics.

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Okay.

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Well, where do I want to be, I want to be over near the goal.

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So when I got the ball, you're going to smack it in the goal.

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I'm going to be the head of the game.

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Can you see yourself there?

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My mental says.

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I says, yeah, I can see myself there.

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How do I get there though?

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And he's replying with dropped me down on my knees.

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He said, walk over and take the position Robb.

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I'm like what?

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You've already visualized it, walk over and take the position.

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And that's where many people go wrong because they visualize

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something that they oh, no.

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Wow.

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That's crazy.

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I can't do that.

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Why do you think Apple guys come from, a Google guys and Amazon guys?

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I have a picture of the Amazon guy in a tiny little office with

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a, with a canvas at the back of him sprayed on saying Amazon.

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Selling five bucks a week, but you had a dream in the end, a vision,

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and he believed in it, he believed.

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Netflix did the same, you know, everybody was selling videos and renting

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videos, they've tried to go and, you know, help work with blockbuster.

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Blockbuster said, no, you're too small.

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You can't do anything.

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Well, so many Netflix and I'll take you as a CEO said, screw you.

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We can do everything we want to do.

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And sooner or later the blockbusters go out with our business because of Netflix.

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It's all about knowing.

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It's all about belief.

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It's all about walking forward.

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And every single day making sure stuff happens and a Champion's way

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to do this is when you get up in the morning, write five things down

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that you're going to do that day.

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Even if it's breakfast, lunch, visit the dentist, go for that interview

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by wife, some flowers, put it down every morning and then five things

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cross off as you go through the day.

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And if you've completed five things, when you finished the day,

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you've moved forward to your dream.

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And if you've only done four of them, because you were too busy,

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then you've taken a step back.

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We don't , believe in this country, that's the problem.

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Take the brakes off your imagination, take them off because every

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single body can do what I've done.

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I'm not, I wish I could sit here Vit and tell you how special I am.

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And how amazing..

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, I'm nothing special.

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I just had a dream and a vision.

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This is great, what you just said, like I was, I was going to ask you about that.

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Like how can somebody, how can somebody that is in a really, really dark place

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What would be like the easiest first step?

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And so this is great.

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like focus on something super simple.

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Like even if it's like, I'm going to.

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Eat a breakfast today, I'm going to eat lunch and I'm going to eat dinner

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and I'm going to go for five minutes, walk something that is super low-key.

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Right.

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And by accomplishing those things, that's like that first step, Like, it's going

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to give you a a bit of a satisfaction, something like you can say, okay.

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I, I thought about doing it and I did it and I've accomplished it and I can, okay.

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If that's it, the brain, the brain takes as a success, you want to start the day

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off, great have succeeded in something?

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Make.

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laughter.

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My mentor told me Tom and I make that make him a better wife to make your bed Rob.

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And I did it and the brain looks at it as, as a win.

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You, you do four of them a day.

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All of a sudden you're winning every single thing you do.

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And once your imagination is fired.

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Ask for that job, go for that job.

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Ask for that girlfriend or that boyfriend ask for the house.

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There's no reason at all, why you can't do it.

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You just need to set your life out planning every single day.

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When you get up, make bed, lunch,dinner, walk, .Flowers, the next day, make

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bad go for a 10 mile run, you know, apply for that to get five things every

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single day in the morning, the night before, write them down and the brain

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will get used to success all the time.

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That's all it is.

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And, and the, and the more the subconscious brain loads, them, new

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neural pathways and ideas, when you come to self-sabotage, which is, oh my

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God, I've got an interview tomorrow.

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Oh my God.

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Oh my God.

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The brain's not going to do that.

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The brain is going to go, yeah, this is yours.

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This is yours.

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Walk in.

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We prep the highest paid actors and footballers.

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We work with them, a normal guy sweeping the road.

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We, we, we prep them for that.

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One of the guys we had, they knew, I took him to my private clinic in

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Texas I picked him up from jail.

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We did, there was a bunch of us, picked him up from jail and.

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The judge says, I'm gonna release it to you, Dr.

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Rob, but let me tell you categorically that if he goes missing, cause he

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always did, he will, he was a runner then, and this is a broken down actor

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who Hollywood had had enough of him.

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And we took him back to our ranch and we convinced him that within

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90 days, he was going to be the biggest movie star ever, ever.

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And we worked on him and we worked on him and everybody in the clinic worked

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on him, everytime he past looking great.

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Oh my God, you're amazing.

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Wow.

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Which everyone has.

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And he started to believe it.

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And he got more confidence in two weeks before he was due to leave.

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A big parcel came and the mail and the, and the chauffeur went

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down to the gate to pick it up.

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And he brought it up to the house and he said, Dr.

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Rob, there's the package for your guy?

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And I walked to him and i pass it to him, and he looked at this package

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and he looks at me and he opened it and he pulled it out and he went, oh

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my God, it's a script for Iron Man.

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And that the rest is history.

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That was a Robert Downey Junior?

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And the rest is history and that's how you do life.

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That's how we do life today.

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I've had a guy who always wanted to do, he wanted to be the forman , he

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wanted to be a manager of this road crew that went around sweeping roads.

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That was his ambition.

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And that's all he wanted to do.

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We prepped him for that.

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When the interview was time he walked in, he snatched that job.

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It already, he's already got it before he even walked in.

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He was so confident, not cocky, but confident that he would get this,

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that they almost didn't interview him.

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He walks in proud, he sat down, he looked him straight in the eye

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and he started off with about me.

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What do I do?

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What I'm about why do I want this job and how I could make you proud of the success?

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And within four or five minutes of him leaving, they called him

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up and said, you've got the job.

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This is what life's about.

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And people are scared.

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I can't do that Robbbb.

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Not me.

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I'm not that clever.

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I beg to differ million dollar mind going to college for four years.

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doesn't make you anything special you know,,, especially these days.

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If you want to know a complicated answer or riddle or math, Google it, Google it,

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all the answers are there,, you know, you can be the smartest man in the room.

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If you spend some time on Google and find out what stuffs.

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So the game has changed, guys.

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It really has changed.

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There's more unemployed PhDs than there are working PhDs.

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That's all I'm saying about that.

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So powerful, Rob, have you got anything for small business owners?

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you know, you keep hearing this, you know?

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Yeah.

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not now.

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Yeah.

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We can't afford you.

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And what would you say to that?

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What would be something that you've you've you've used like maybe a phrase or,

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yeah, well, I was a obviously small business owner.

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If, if, if not now, Guys, if not now, when I have to ask people,

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when I, when I go into companies, I

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what's your most valuable asset and they go, oh, our staff.

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Wrong!

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Most valuable asset is the customer, you know, one or two people working for you.

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It's unbelievable what we can create these days on your own, on the internet.

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Treat everybody nice, inspire, no matter if you have one customer or two, do

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the best you can every day with them.

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And, and, and it's like, it's like a, I don't know, it's

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like a smiling or laughing.

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It's contagious.

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And people would have mounted the best form of appetizer in this world ever.

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And now everybody's gone in doors.

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It's even better.

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You know, we reach more people, more people, our, our more the day, you know,

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it's just like, if you want to stay a small business owner, do it with pride,

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whether you're cleaning somebody's windows or whether you're, you know,

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educating somebody to work at the highest computer in the world, do it with pride.

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Do it, cause you want to.

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You know, I, I used to get up on a, on a, on a Sunday, especially Sunday night

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and go, oh my God, it's work tomorrow.

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If you're doing that guys, you're in the wrong job.

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I created a company that people get up on a Sunday, have a great day and Sunday

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night and think, oh my God, it's amazing.

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I've got work tomorrow.

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It's all about passion.

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Get passionate, have passion about whatever you do and have belief belief

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that you're going to be a success.

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Start living as if you're going to have success.

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The guys that come in Vit, broken down, I take him to the Porche

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dealerships and I let them drive round in 911 is worth $150,000.

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I'd take him to the million dollar listings and we walk around

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as if we're going to buy it.

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And the reason why I do that is he's already acting like a millionaire.

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So when he comes and it will.

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The brain doesn't freak out and go, oh my God, this, this expensive car,

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it gets in the car and his brain goes, oh yeah, I remember this.

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This is very comfortable.

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You know, so always think positive.

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Everybody has bad days.

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Well, I don't have bad days.

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I have a better day than others, but everyone has down days.

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Come on.

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This is not about you as a business owner.

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This is about your customers.

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This is how you can provide to a local community or nationwide a

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service with love, kindness, and care.

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And I tell you something now, if it doesn't work, call me, I'll give

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you a half a million or something.

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You know, it always works.

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It's proven, tried success route to go down in

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. Rob this whole interview.

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Amazing.

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Yeah.

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We've really turned it around didn't we?

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Yeah.

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It was very dark and gloomy, especially, I was shocked when he said that yeah.

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That you stop your wife and started to bring him back up.

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But that was, you know, I was, I was kind of like what the hell?

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Yeah.

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And the madness of what I went through.

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It was insanity is where I was.

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So, yeah, but there's always a good turn.

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See I had to go through that Vit to become the person I am today.

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All that, all that stuff that I went through, it was like a

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semester at Harvard, the knowledge, information, and gift that I have

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today for pass on to other people.

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That's what it's all about.

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Whether you're selling bananas.

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or you're selling corporate jets, it makes no difference

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how can I best serve the today.

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Tell us about what do you guys do now with your business and you

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know, some of your achievements.

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We're Rob Kelly Recovery Group or Rob Kelly Group, the website is robbkelly.com,

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which is R O B B two base spell the name of CBS Kelly, K E L L y.com.

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We have we that business and, we have, five offices around the world.

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We have Dallas, Texas.

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We have San Antonio, Texas.

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We have Manchester United Kingdom,

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we have Mallorca in Spain and we have Zurich in Switzerland

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that have five offices.

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We use most of all.

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Is, is honest and, and pro bono, depending on, you know, we have a 20% pro bono,

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things that we're always giving back.

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We spent over a hundred thousand dollars last year giving back into

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the communities around the country and sometimes around the world.

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We've, we've, we've oftene when you're working with, you know, young

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moms whose father has left because alcoholics or alcoholic dads, you

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want the kids back for the weekend.

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You know, we will give them money.

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We will buy them, you know, a little car we will pay the first

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six months rent in that apartment.

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We just help people and give back on a daily basis.

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There's always a request coming in for people that are really in a bad, bad

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state, because that's what we do you know, we do a lot of other charitable.

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I did a charity thing two or three nights ago.

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I did it for a war veterans, EMTs and police officers.

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And it was a PTSD talk.

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So we do lots of talks, lots of training.

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we run a recovery coach course as well, four times a year.

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It's a 10 weeks, a hundred hours . We do that as well.

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But yeah, we just do a lot of radio, a lot TV as you know, And,

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thinking of writing my second book.

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And funny enough, if you, the book by the way is on Amazon and in Walmart,

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and every single dime or penny, goes straight back into the community.

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We take no profits off it, all everything goes back in to the communities and

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we thought we'd name it, the last thing my daughter said to me, which was

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'Daddy, daddy, please stop drinking'.

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So that's the name of the book, but just to cap everything, just

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to prove to everybody that things can be turned around is my youngest

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daughter all these years on.

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I've never got in contact with me, but three years ago, four years

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ago, my oldest daughter contact me on Facebook through messenger.

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And she says, dad, I've just seen you on TV.

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You know, I want to, I want to meet you, because I'm not

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seeing it since she was three.

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so I flew over to England and we had a great meeting at the front door.

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And then she took me into her apartment and she introduced me to

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my three month old granddaughter.

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And my heart was absolutely broken.

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It was just beautiful, beautiful love.

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And then after conversations had been there for a few days, she

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said, I want to do what you do, dad.

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I want to become a.

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Neuro linguistic programmer.

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and there's a course and I'll become a therapist.

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So I paid for it to go through the course.

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And six months ago she opened my Manchester office.

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So now she works for dad and dad's no longer a drunk and a bum

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Congratulations to that.

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That's incredible,

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Rob.

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Let's wrap this up.

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This was amazing.

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So what would be top three biggest takeaways.

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You'd like our listeners to walk away with after listening today,

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Believe in yourself, a hundred percent.

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love others always, love others, even if they do wrong, and be true to yourself.

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That's it?

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Rob, thank you so much for jumping on this interview.

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I know you're a busy guy, so I appreciate you sharing the story.

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and I really hope that's my biggest wish is that we've right now in someone's

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ears, listening to this help make an impact and maybe plan the seed towards.

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whether it's recovery from addiction to alcohol, drugs or

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recovery from depression, whatever recovery, I hope that we've made

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it a positive impact on somebody's.

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it doesn't.

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It doesn't have to always get as bad for you to realize that you

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need to shift your things around.

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You know, Rob stories is incredible.

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Yeah.

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kind of, yeah, that's kind of what I, all I have So, thank you once again.

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Thank you for jumping on the show.

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and thank you guys for listening.

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Thank you guys for listening to today's episode on the Success Inspired Podcast.

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Now, if you've enjoyed this interview and you found it impactful and you feel

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like this could help somebody else by listening to this and please, please share

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it with your mates, sharing your socials.

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all the links are on the, on the page, you know, share it with

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anybody that you think that would would benefit from listening, okay.

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So for any show notes and the links, I'm going to put Rob's link.

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So if any of you out there that's like need help.

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you know, he's he's clinics around the world.

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Zurich, Manchester, Mallorca, and then two in Texas.

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You can reach out to him for help and you don't have to live there.

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You know, I'm pretty sure the rope has stuff that he does online.

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You know, it's, I'd be surprised if he doesn't have that stuff, right?

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Yeah, absolutely.

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So, so for any show notes, some of the links in the extra tips, anything like

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that to help you accomplish more in life and realize your true potential,

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please go to successinspiredpodcast.com and Rob's website is robbkelly.com.

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It's R O B BK e double L y.com.

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so thank you and have a great rest of your day, everybody