For some of us, surface-level strategies land like empty calories. They might be useful in theory, but if they don’t meet the depth of our lived experience, our body knows instantly:

“This isn’t it.”

That depth isn’t a flaw or a barrier. It’s your natural intelligence. It’s the well you draw from when you’re at your best… the place where real insight, courage, and sustainable change are born.

The problem is, most leadership advice is built for speed and output, not for people whose strength lies in discernment.

And when you try to lead from a model that ignores your depth, you’re forced into one of two burnout patterns:

• Absorbing urgency and pressure that isn’t yours
• Rejecting potentially useful ideas just to protect yourself from overwhelm

Explore this by hitting play.

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“I’m ready for something else... but I don’t know what that is.”

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This podcast explores the intersection of sales, money, and business success, offering entrepreneurial insights on overcoming the inner critic, burnout, and the unique challenges of ADHD and autoimmune conditions, while integrating polyvagal theory, Ayurveda, coaching, resilience, regulation, and trauma healing to support holistic growth and thriving in both life and business.

  📍 You've ever sat in some type of leadership training or business calls and left filling more depleted than energized even when the content was good. This may be the reason for it. 📍 It's not just that you're tired though, let's be honest. You probably are. It's that your system is processing information differently compared to the people who were sitting next to you and compared to how you used to six months ago or three years ago.

You are not this like. Sponge or blank state, kind of just taking in ideas. Even though you are, sometimes you might feel like a sponge, you might feel like you take on everyone else's emotions or feelings or thoughts. Um, your body is this very finely tuned system that metabolizes everything through many layers of lived experience.

Some. Are essential to the nature of who you are, and they feel like yourself and some are not, and they feel like tension or societal conditioning. So today we're gonna talk about human design, which is the energetic blueprint of how you receive, process and act on information. And then your conditioning, which is the internalized expectations about what is enough, um, how you should move, how you should interact with people, um, who you need to be in order to feel safe, to know that you have sustainable income, to feel respected, to be successful.

If you are not familiar with human design, please go. Well, I would say just listen to this, get an idea of it and see like, if this makes sense to you, I'll explain it in a very different way to how most human design people explain it. I'm not a human design, uh, like coach. I haven't done certifications.

I've just. Learned a lot about it and been studying it for years, and my, me and my clients use it quite a bit. Uh, but if you don't really know about it, you can go and get your free chart ultra skepticism for a second. Just wait to look at it. This, um, at my human design is the website that I use. It's free.

It's based on your birth time. Hold your spec, your skepticism for a second. Um, and. You don't really need to understand all the pieces. I'm gonna help you make sense of it. I'm gonna help you make sense of it through the lens of the nervous system, not through the lens of, uh, like astrology based stuff that other people are better at.

Yeah. Anyway. So for somebody who is emotionally intelligent, maybe a little bit sensitive, uh. You. You've done hard things, right? You've held space for others, you've led teams, and you've kept everything moving. Sometimes at the times where your energy has felt depleted or chaotic or scattered or frayed at the edges.

And what I find for women like you and me, is that traditional bias often does the opposite of what it is supposed to. It doesn't give you the sense of clarity and understanding, and actually. Triggers a whole cascade of, uh, frustration or irritation or just even depletion like this, kind of like, oh, this feels heavy and wrong and hard.

And that is often because your body, your nervous system, it's not just, you know, managing the information and the to-do list that you have. Outside of that, it's. Constantly metabolizing this, meaning your body is going through this process of understanding. Okay, cool. And number one, should I pay attention to it?

And number two, what does this mean for me? Particularly if you have a lot on your plate. What does this mean for me? Is this important? Is this going to help me? Is this a waste of time? And your body is smart enough to say a big no. When the pace or the pressure or the. Paradigm doesn't fit you. The thing is though, sometimes it actually does fit you.

It might need to be changed in the way that it is presented and sometimes that big fat, no, like I don't want it. Take this on. It is coming from a place of resistance. Uh, and so it's like this is actually gonna help you a lot, and your initial resistance to it is a self-protective mechanism, and sometimes it's just not for you.

But anyway, let's just. Name a little bit of the science behind it when you take in an idea whether that is feedback from a colleague or a podcast telling you to just be more consistent or just rest, um, or any type of advice a. That feels misaligned. Your amygdala is deciding if it's safe. So this information is coming through into your sensors, through all of the nerve systems, up into the limbic system, into your brain, and it's going through a very complicated process that involves many different parts, like your particular activating system, um, to then process, is this something that I need to pay attention to and is it actually safe for me to pay attention to it?

If you've been in toxic work cultures or you've over functioned, you've done a lot of emotional and mental labor for quite a long time. Some of you, since you were a kid, um, or you've been the one that kind of translates the chaos of everyone else into calm, your body is particularly going to react faster than your brain can reframe, even though you're quite self aware.

And or even understand, especially when we don't kind of have a map. Or a way of orienting ourself to ask the questions that you're really good at asking. And so your reaction often becomes filtered through these conditioning or beliefs about the world and yourself. This is what effective neuroscience tells us.

Some examples of this that I noticed in just a call that I had, uh, earlier this morning with a client where she was like, you know, I read this book and I know that there's a lot of insight in it, but I feel foggy when I'm reading it. Or she was like, I made a decision that was very true for me. But as soon as I was back speaking with my colleague, um, uh.

I felt anxious and I started to wanna change my mind. So human design can kind of be a little bit of a blueprint that you didn't learn in leadership school, and I'm gonna name my chart or a couple different chart tendencies we might have and how that will manifest. Through sensations from your nervous system if you have any open center.

So that's when you look at your chart and it's not colored in such as an open route or an open sacral. Uh, you are more likely to absorb other people's urgency expectations and push and go energy. So when somebody tells you something, says, Hey, can you do this? You might find that that feels like pressure.

You are feeling their pressure, you are feeling their energy. I personally have this. Somebody says, Hey, can you do this? And I feel like, ah, this is an urgent. Like it's urgent. I have to get it done now. And that's not true. It's not true. They, they might feel that it's urgent. Uh, they may feel that way. It doesn't mean that it's urgent for me, doesn't mean that it's an emergency for me.

And once again, that is probably just energy. But until I, uh, started noticing this and understanding this. In my system, I just, all I would know and barely even be able to respond to was the fact that like I got a message and I felt like I now needed, I would just react and go and do a thing. Open my laptop, send an email.

Um, I. And then I would be like, frustrated this person for not respecting my boundaries or like messaging me too much. And then I kind of was like, wait a second, this is not, this is not a problem. They're, this is great that they're using, they want to work with me. This is so great that they're asking me these questions.

Like this is what I wanted. I wanted. To be recognized as somebody who can answer these questions. Um, and I wanted to have the flexibility of a role where, of a job where, you know, this, I can kind of work on my own, uh, timeline. So of course they're gonna be messaging me and this isn't urgent, so what is the sensation in my body?

But there's levels of awareness of that. There's, first of all, there. Oh, I notice that I feel like I have to do it straight away. Oh, I notice that this actually may not be true, that I have to do it straight away, and then, oh, I notice that that's actually coming from sensation in my body. Oh, I notice that.

That's the different, I can respond to that. I notice I have these different thoughts when that happens, and, but using human design as a map, I found that I was able to just get to that conclusion a lot quicker. And then by using the nervous system and somatic awareness, I was able to actually change the behavior.

Uh, another one, this is also a me thing on my chart. I'm an emotional authority, meaning that I make decisions a little bit slower than other people, and I need time to like, feel into all of the different emotions around that decision. We ride a wave of emotions, however, a lot of. Society kind of tells us like, you know, when it's a yes and you know when it's a no.

And the world in general tends to praise speed, not necessarily a deep knowing of alignment. So there's a. A, an awareness that I can have and I can teach the people around me that that is how energy runs through my body and that is how I make decisions. And I think also understanding that helps me understand that emotional energy runs through my body in a specific way.

And also that that is not true for everyone else. And then I can use my somatic practices and emotional alchemy techniques. We, I teach a really wonderful one inside of Chapter 10, inside of my book, somatic Intelligence for Success. So I can come outside of that wave and those emotional experiences with more wisdom, literally every single time.

Hmm, okay. Not every single time I have an emotion. Sometimes I have an emotion. It's not mine. I let it go. Sometimes I have an emotion and I'm not wiser at the end. I'm just. In the emotion and then I'm not, uh, one thing that happens a lot, I end up working with a lot of splenic projectors and you, if you look on your human design map, you'll kind of see, it'll say projector and ple, splenic.

And it's this funny thing like maybe 70% of my clients are splenic projectors, but I don't really speak about human design outwardly. It's so funny how we align, but one big thing that I help them with is when you. Ha cannot discern between your splenic authority, which is a subtle authority. It's a kind of like an intuitive knowing that can be subtle and difficult to hear versus fear and anxiety.

And so we have to go really in and understand what is insight and what is a deep knowing inside of me. And what is fear and anxiety? And a lot of the time that requires, number one, releasing a lot of fear and anxiety. So actually creating a sense of safety and an understanding of yourself on the world that makes you less afraid.

And number two, knowing the different like flavor of that in your body. So when you. Ignore what your body is made to do in the world, how it is made to experience energy, how it is made to experience taking in information. You end up defaulting to what everyone else is doing and that overrides your innate knowing your system over time.

That's going to lead to a, meh, I don't like this. And burnout, even if you're trying very hard to do what is aligned and even if you are very, very smart. Over time consistently that's going to end to collapse. That's where, you know, we have people who are like, I got so exhausted. Like I got this chronic illness, I got chronic fatigue.

Um, I had a lot of gut issues. We end up in this snowball. I have problems with my fertility. I'm not saying that all of those things are just from living out of alignment. But if you consistently override what your body needs in order to feel safe, and you put yourself in a consistent stress response,

f every single disease. That you could possibly have is exacerbated or made more likely to occur when you are in that state. So since learning my own design, I have started noticing that sensation of urgency as just information. Um, and I just don't really act on it. And honestly, it kind of just like goes away.

Oftentimes once I give myself the space or I just ask myself the question, what would I do if I had, if I knew that I had time? It just kind of resolves itself and moving forward towards the goal is just, it's just easier. This is what we do inside of one-on-one coaching. So if any of the couple of things I'm about to mention, sound familiar.

Just keep listening. So, okay, number one, I'm drowning in work, but I can't switch off. Number two, I know I'm capable, but everything feels foggy. Number three, I wanna make a change, but I'm scared that I will screw something up or I will fail. Number four, I feel like I'm walking on eggshells, but like I.

Almost inside of my own head. Like any day now, there's gonna be a, an emotional down. Um, and I used to feel really connected and fulfilled and full of purpose, but now it feels like I'm just kind of going through the motions. This is your body doing what it is designed to do, keep you safe

and. You don't have to keep choosing that because there is a better option for it, and you will over time, maybe you're already beginning to notice that picking the thing that feels safe and familiar to your body is actually making you live in a very unsafe, physical, mental and emotional experience.

Everything feels bad and you're beginning to notice the effects on your relationships, on your body, on the way that you wake up in the morning. So. You don't need more pros and cons list. You need to know, and you need to master how energy runs through your body. Through your nervous system, perhaps through your human design if you're called to it.

And you also need to disentangle for almost these internalized rules that you didn't consent to, and that is how we unlock what you were craving. That role that fits. With who you are today, not who you felt that you had to be in the past, a decision making rhythm that you can really trust. You can say, I, I, I know this to be true.

I know that I'm on the right path. I know that I've made the right decisions. Even when you, you know, speak with people who have made very different life choices and in the past they would leave you questioning yours and. A system and a nervous system that can hold the level of, um, responsibility or money or success.

Orvis um, visibility without filling you with anxiety and sabotaging other things is really important to you. And then energy that returns through rest, but also through. Activity and engagement. So you're welcome to consider one-on-one coaching. We don't go into it with this fix you mindset. It's just about helping you recognize what's yours, so that you can build a work life that feels like you, so that you can create a role and a schedule aligned with your nervous system.

For some of you, that's gonna be scaling your business. Or others, it's gonna be, uh, getting a job that's a bit different. And some of you, it's gonna be a hybrid combination of that. But we open our opportunities so that you feel grounded and stable and you have the capacity for what comes next. So if you're nodding along or you're feeling like, ah.

A bit of an exhale, you might be ready for it. We can start with a clarity intensive to kind of triage a little bit of the fog and identify your current capacity. Uh, and if we need, we can make a decision about something that you've been kind of mental mentally looping on, or if you're ready for a deeper shift, we can explore full one-on-one coaching container.

You. I'm gonna find all of that information inside of my website. The link will be done in the show notes, but you can essentially go share to ruth.com/coaching. This is a place where your sensitivity stops feeling like a liability or a weakness and actually starts becoming your strategy and your strength.

Um, excited to get to know you, walk this path with you. If you have any questions or you just wanna feel into it, book a free call. And. I will be happy to, yeah. Support you and give you information for your decision making process, whatever that looks like. I.