We meet with Jennifer, a resilient breast cancer survivor, and her husband Lloyd, who stood by her side as both a loving partner and a devoted caregiver. Diagnosed with cancer while raising young children, Jennifer faced an overwhelming challenge, but she wasn't alone. Together, Jennifer and Lloyd navigated the difficulties of treatment, parenting, and work, drawing strength from their deep bond and unshakeable positivity.

They share how CanCare volunteers played a crucial role in their journey, offering a listening ear and guidance from those who had walked the same path when they needed it most. Join us as Jennifer and Lloyd reflect on the power of partnership, the importance of emotional support, and the enduring hope that carried them through their toughest days.

Mentioned Resources:

CanCare- www.cancare.org

About the Guests:

Jennifer - breast cancer survivor and mother of two who faced her diagnosis while having young children. Jennifer is a former CanCare client, and now a volunteer.

Lloyd - Jennifer’s husband who balanced his role as a loving father to their children while navigating the challenges of his wife’s cancer journey. Llyod was so moved by CanCare's support and mission that he now sits on the board of directors.

About Our Host:

Darcie Champagne Wells is the President and CEO of CanCare, Inc., a nonprofit dedicated to providing support to the cancer community by pairing cancer patients with survivors. Since joining in November 2020 as the third President & CEO, Darcie has driven significant growth, increasing one-to-one support matches by 45% and healthcare referrals by 66%. In 2022, she initiated the Impact Acceleration Initiative to further expand support for cancer patients and caregivers. Her leadership has earned her recognition as a “Most Admired CEO” and “Woman Who Means Business” by the Houston Business Journal, and national “Fundraiser of the Year” by RAISE. Darcie holds a BS in Business Administration from Louisiana State University and an MBA from the University of Houston.

https://www.cancare.org/

https://www.facebook.com/CanCareInc

https://www.instagram.com/cancare_inc

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Welcome to hope in the face of cancer, where we share real stories of courageous people in their cancer journey. Today, we're joined by a remarkable couple, Jennifer and Lloyd, whose love and deep commitment to each other helped them overcome the trials of Jennifer's cancer journey. Jennifer is a breast cancer survivor, mother of two who faced her diagnosis while having young children. A former KanCare client and now a volunteer, Jennifer's husband Lloyd balanced his role as a loving father to their children while navigating the challenges of his wife's cancer journey together, Lloyd and Jennifer's touching story is a testament to the power of positivity hope and the profound impact of having a supportive community. We're thrilled to speak with this inspirational couple. Welcome to the show, Jennifer and Lloyd. Thanks for joining us today. Thank

you for having us. We're very grateful to share this story

absolutely you know. I just want to say thank you as well. Before we get started today for both of you really dedicating yourselves to kancare's mission by becoming volunteers and serving in different ways. And we'll get into that as we talk today, but thank you. We're so grateful for you.

Well, very grateful of what KanCare gave us, and therefore we're very, very happy to give back

absolutely, absolutely so let's start setting the stage for our audience with it's really just been over eight years, eight years ago in August, Jennifer, that you first heard those words. You have cancer. So let's go back there. Tell us a little bit about how you learned what that was like, and just walk us through that time in your life.

Yeah, thanks and thanks for having us, because absolutely and nice to give back. So it was August 2016 I was just going through the motions of life, like you said, had two young kids, and just doing what I was supposed to be doing, and had a mammogram at 40. I was almost 41 at the time, and surprisingly, get a call back that there's something suspicious and freaked out, you know, called back, got in right away, and they immediately did another mammogram and ultrasound, and they said, Yeah, this is this is not looking good. So from that point on, I pretty much knew, even though it wasn't confirmed, that it was cancer. And fast forward a little bit to when the biopsy came back and confirmed it. I was actually stunned, just even though I knew I probably had cancer, just hearing those words, it's cancer, and it's actually a spread to your lymph node on the right side. You need to go see an oncologist and a breast surgeon. And when I heard those words that, you know, Lloyd was with me, and I just it stopped. My world just stopped. I didn't want to go home to see my kids. I didn't want to see my mother. It was I didn't know what I was going to do financially, with my career, my being a mom, it was, I just didn't know. So it almost was debilitating, and I wasn't sure quite where to go, because I didn't know anyone, yeah, that had been through this.

Sure, what was that experience like for you on walking by her side through this and watching her struggle with this news?

Oh, it was, it was very difficult, because prior to her diagnosis, she was an anxious person anyway, and this just added to the anxiety that that she had. And, man, I had no idea how to handle it or what to say, because whenever you're diagnosed, there's nothing you can say to make it better. So I like being a fixer, and I couldn't fix this one. So that's, that's it was. It was definitely a very difficult day, yeah,

and a sense of powerlessness, you know, there. And

if you'd like, I'll kind of tell the, at least tee up the story to how we were told,

yeah, I'd love to hear that. And so, you know, Jennifer

had mentioned all of the the the mammogram and the and the the the biopsies and all that stuff, while she had an appointment with her OBGYN, the OBGYN came in and said, Oh, you have cancer. Here is a card of somebody that you need to go see, and I made an appointment for you, but it's in two days, and we're like, Okay, now, what do we do? And so,

yeah, the lack of empathy in that moment, right? It was

terrible. It was absolutely. Be terrible. So that's that was the mindset of where we were at that particular time of day.

Yeah, and you didn't have that empathy that you probably needed in that moment and hearing that news for sure. So you guys ended up at Houston Methodist, and tell us a little bit about that experience. You're going to see the oncologist, and before you even get there, you know some something else momentous really happened in this moment to change that story you know, from being one of a fear to hope. Tell us a little bit about

that. Yeah. So we had a close group that was kind of keeping tabs on us as I was getting the news, and we had reached out, or Lloyd did, and told him, You know, it's cancer, and a couple of them knew someone that was a KanCare volunteer and reached out and asked if we could try to get their help. They were a hospital volunteer with KanCare at Houston Methodist and try to get some help getting us in to see somebody fast. And we did. We actually got an appointment that same day at 430 it was her last appointment, and I'm still walking through the halls, you know, just in a cloud. Lloyd was just stringing me along, you know, doing my paperwork, doing everything, and it was just a dark, dark time, and everything was quiet. There was nobody on that floor. It was the end of the day, and we got called in, and we're waiting for the oncologist, and here comes this nice lady just introducing herself, and she's, she says, I'm Ruth Davies, you know, I'm with KanCare and a volunteer, and someone told me that you would be here today. And I, I was like, Okay, what does she you know, what is this?

Who are you? What do you want?

Yeah, very skeptical. And she says, I've been through this. I've done this. I've been through it twice, actually, you know, I'm a two time breast cancer survivor, and at that moment, it's just like a huge weight lifted, because finally, I could connect with someone who had been through cancer and someone that had went through it in her 40s as well. So she knew what it was like, and she just held my hand and rubbed on my, you know, my arm, and she says, we're going to get through this. You're going to be fine. And I'm just crying and crying. She even teared up a little bit, and she just let me cry and talk, and kind of just left the room. She was like, this little angel that came in and then just left when doc, the doctor, came in, and I was like, already at peace, knowing there's someone there for me that I can actually talk to you. So

what's that was like for you? Lloyd, oh, man, it

was absolutely amazing. So like, Jennifer, here's this, here's this nice old lady that didn't know who she was or what, and hugging all over Jennifer and get rid of the kind words and just listening to her sob, as I had been doing the entire day. But whatever she the connection that she had at that particular moment was literally like a light bulb going off and or a sweat light switch going on that really turned the tide of of the day, of the of the journey, and this is the very beginning of the journey where she had just been told earlier in the morning that she had cancer. And that moment in time with that KanCare volunteer, I'll be forever grateful for because of the impact, and it's the moment in time where, where that KanCare volunteer was there when we needed her, and it helped me more than than she would ever know that she was able to help Jennifer. So it was an awesome feeling for me too. So

that's wonderful. So at this point, you are probably getting some more details about a treatment plan, and I understand your treatment journey was pretty extensive, multiple surgeries take us through that.

Yeah, I really didn't know what I was in for. I mean, nobody does when you get that news, so I kind of follow the lead of my oncologist, and first had to do a lot of testing just to make sure, because it had already spread to my lymph node, just to make sure it hadn't spread through the body to other organs, and wasn't a later stage than we already knew we were. So all of those tests. Back, and it was still just isolated to the lymph node. So their their plan was to do surgery first and then decide if I need a chemo and radiation. I was like, Okay, I'll do that. So go to visit the breast surgeon, the plastic surgeon, and I actually had decided on a surgery called Deep flap, which they took, you know, skin from my belly, put it up into the reconstructed breast, so pretty much cut me hip to hip. And I wasn't quite ready for that, like, meaning I didn't know what I was getting myself into. Sure, it was about a 13 hour surgery, which they did the deep flap, full double mastectomy, lymph dissection, took out 25 lymph nodes on the right side, one on the left. So it was very intensive. Four weeks after that was first they told me, No chemo. Then it got overruled by the tumor board, and they decided, yes, I need at least four rounds of chemo and six weeks of radiation. So I went through all of that pretty much back to back. I didn't, I didn't waste any time. However, I had a couple complications in the hospital. I had a hematoma on the right side of the reconstructed breast, very scary. Had to do middle of the night emergency surgery to clear it out. Then I didn't heal properly my stomach. So they had to go in and put a plastic mesh twice to pull down my stomach, it looked like I was six months pregnant, just a very weird complication had nothing to do with the surgeon. So I did go through a lot, but in the middle of chemo, you know, after I had done the surgery, I reached back out to KanCare and just asked, you know, is there anyone that has been through this stage of cancer, the type of cancer the same, basically, the deep flap type surgery also did it in, yeah, and they came Back and matched me up with someone who actually lived in my area of town in Cyprus, and her name was Teresa, and we met, and yes, she went through all the same things. Um, very similar journey, similar, but different. Um, but the thing that stood out to me with meeting her was there was hope for me, because I could see her 10 years, like, 10 or 12 years out of her journey, and she looked amazing, and she was successful, and she finished raising her kids. Her kids were in college, and I was like, Oh, maybe I can do that too. So seeing and talking to her was huge, because it gave me something to look forward to, and she was very positive, but she let me talk a lot. She always checked in with me, so that was nice to have that as well, and

and someone that you can truly relate to, who has walked in your shoes, because I would imagine going through this experience. You know, you can be surrounded by friends and family, and they can give you love, but they can't truly understand what it is you're going through

that's a very important thing, because, like Lloyd said, he is 100% supportive and loving and caring, but no one understands what it's like to be told you have cancer, And no one understands going through all of that, you know, treatments and surgeries and all the emotions, and in my case, hormones, issues and stuff like that, no one understands that until they've been through it, right? And so it's almost like you don't connect and you don't understand until someone has walked a similar road of cancer.

Absolutely, I can only imagine Lloyd that having that resource for Jennifer was a relief to you as well. I mean, having been a caregiver myself, sometimes you just don't know how to be the best support. What was that time while she was going through all this treatment like for you, and how did you care for you in that process as well?

So, like we said earlier, we had two young kids, and they kept us busy. Full time job that keeps me busy just trying to juggle. All of that, as well as being a caregiver, it just added one more thing to the plate, right? But what Jennifer, like, Jennifer said, There's I could be there, I could be loving. I could be as supportive as possible. I could listen, but without truly going through it or knowing what, what it's like. I couldn't offer the words and wisdom or guidance that somebody else that that has gone through it could give and having, having that KanCare volunteer be that person for Jennifer was a huge deal, and she would, she would come home, they went to dinner before, and she'd come home from dinner, and it was like a huh, a different person too, yeah, and I could take her to dinner, but, you know, and so it was, I know

you would make her laugh if you took her to know You do that? Well,

I would, I would try to flex my muscles and do all the stuff that makes her laugh, but, but, yeah, the doing, doing those sort of things, and being there and hugging and doing all the stuff just doesn't connect the same way as that. Somebody that says, Hey, I've had cancer as well. This is my story. You know yours is going to be different, but similar, and that just that that goes beyond what you can really say in words and what you can really comprehend as a caregiver, that it really, truly does make a difference. And for that, I'm grateful.

Yeah, one thing I want to mention, if I could is that both Teresa and Ruth actually just, they would just show up or call, or, you know, be there when I didn't expect it, so if they knew I was having a surgery, Ruth would just kind of show up in the because she was a hospital volunteer, she would show up in the waiting room, or she tried to come see me before I went back for pre op. And it was just such a sense of peace to know she was around. And my my parents would tell you the same thing, like she provided so much support to them because they were so scared, you know, as an only child, and they had never been through anything like this before, and very nervous and anxious, but she just showed up, and she has showed up continuously through the eight years. Ruth has, for sure, even showed up at my father's funeral. So it's she's just an incredible person, but you develop these relationships, and you care so much for you know your client that you want to do stuff like, yeah, that and it means so much. Yeah. Emphasize that enough.

Now it's beautiful.

Then Ruth has said that she gets as much out of it as what Jennifer does. And so that's very hard to comprehend because of what I see, what I see, that that Jennifer gets out of it. So

no, absolutely, we hear that a lot from our volunteers, that they get as much from the experience as the clients they serve. For sure, you know, it's part of the ongoing healing process, and just being able to give something that is truly unique that other people don't have the capacity to give. Obviously, with the journey that you had and so many treatments and the complications you have, there were many challenges. Was there a particular challenge that really stands out to you about your journey?

Several, I think the last big one, or the one that stands out for me, was when I was doing one of my revision surgeries, and that didn't work. It worked. Held my stomach down about 70% so the plastic surgeon says I need to go back in and take that out, like, get it out of the tissue and put something larger and and I was like, what this is the fourth time, or whatever, that we're going in that same incision, and at the same time, he was going to do some revision up top, after radiation, and do it at the same time. And I told Lloyd, I remember being at the hospital, we had a visit, and I said, I just don't want to do this anymore, like I just, I'm tired of doing surgeries. Who, who knows if this is going to work. And I was kind of, kind of short with the surgeon, you know, I was just frustrated because I kind of blamed him. And anyway, so I asked him to call me, you know, like I wanted to talk to him again after the. Appointment, and I was crying. He actually called me from the operating room, which was amazing. I can't say enough about Methodist, but he called me and he said, Look, if you were my wife, I would do this again. And I would say 99% it would work. And I was like, okay, you know, it was just, that's another thing. It's like, you gotta trust your doctors. You know, you gotta lean on them and trust them. If you don't have that connection, find another doctor. So that was a it was just, I was so tired, so tired of everything and all I all that I had been through, but that was the last really hard time, I guess, that I had. I think one would say that the hardest time for him was that the emergency surgery for the hematoma in the middle of the night for

sure. Yeah, expect the unexpected, right? Yeah, because it was in

the middle of the night, and and, and, like the hospital was completely dead. There was no nobody there. And all of a sudden, one of her breasts went from normal size to gigantically huge. And just like, Wait, that's not right. And so I right here, yeah, so, you know, being by myself and a weight surgery waiting room, you have all these things going through my mind. That was, that was by far the worst for me, for sure,

understandably, so obviously, it was a challenging experience through the treatment journey and the revisions and having to kind of go back to our listeners who may be facing a cancer diagnosis today, or maybe they're starting their treatment journey or in the middle of their treatment journey. What advice would you give them Jennifer to how you how you stayed strong, you know, through that process, you know, what can you look back on and reflect back on? That was part of the key for you, getting through that.

Yeah, it's just exactly what you said a minute ago. It's expect the unexpected. I was such a control freak, you know, and I thought wanted everything planned out. I wanted to know every detail, and soon, within all the revisions and things that had gone wrong, I was like, Okay, this is not up to me, like I have to just go with the flow. And a part of that was therapy, when I went to my therapist, but that's what I tell every client, KanCare client is, please don't try to plan everything out. Take it one step at a time, and definitely be ready for something challenging to happen, whether it's, you know, financially with your insurance, whether it's the doctor telling you something that's not right, or, you know, seeing a second opinion, whatever it is, just expect that and don't get mad about it, because you're just going to drive yourself crazy. And they will tell, you know, a lot of clients will say you were so right. You know, you were so right. Because if you try to navigate the ship yourself, you're going to have a lot of challenges. That

makes a whole lot of sense. You know, just being, being ready for the unexpected. And in some way, I think it sounds like just trusting you have to really trust those around you who are guiding you through this process, and that can be challenging for a Type A personality to let go of a little bit of control and say, you know, I'm in great hands, and I'm makes a lot of sense. Great, great advice. So go ahead,

there's just been times where I've asked my oncologist, are you sure we've done everything? Are you sure? He

just says, What

did I tell you six months ago? I said, I just want to know. I just want to make sure. And so, yeah, that's but

I think it's great that you're advocating for yourself too, and but by even just asking that question, you're advocating for yourself. And I think that's another thing we hear a lot, maybe, is some fear and reticence to ask the question. And you know, don't be afraid to, you know, get what you need from that journey. Absolutely so soon after your recovery, you became a KanCare volunteer. Tell us about what motivated you because your, I mean, your experience was so hard I could imagine if I were in your shoes. You know, I may feel like, Man, I really want to put this behind me, but instead, you turned your energy toward helping other. In a similar situation, what brought you to that?

I mean, I think a lot of my faith, because I finally realized that that's my gift, probably that's my gift that I should be giving to someone else, because it meant so much to me, and I'm the type of person where I'm going to I like to talk so and I like to talk loyalty. I like to talk to people and form relationships. So I was like, what better thing could I do than give back to someone who is facing something very similar, and give them some hope, you know, and calm their worries a little bit, even just a little bit, you know, if I could do that after the first phone call or the first text or whatever, and when somebody, when a client, tells me, Oh, just talking to you has helped so much, I take that back as job all Done. You know, that's what I'm supposed to be doing. And it just confirms that's, that's what I needed. So has

there a particular client that you served that really stands out on in your mind, as you know, knowing that you both helped them, but also it filled you up?

Yeah, it's actually one of my more recent clients that came Actually, she's from California, and she came to me similar ages when I was diagnosed and she didn't have kids, but she was just about as a mess as I was, and hearing her and hearing those fears and Hearing the tears and, you know all of that, I could relate to that. And again, after the first call, it helped so much. She was just really seeking out through support groups and things like, nothing was working for her. Yeah, and she says this what you're doing, and what you have told me, has given me so much hope for my future. You know, I just thought everything was going down the drain pretty much. I didn't think I'd be able to work again or anything. And she, I mean, she didn't get better right away. It took some time. It took several months. But, you know, she'll text me and she's like, I'm almost done with radiation, and I'm feeling great, and I'm like, wow, if you coulda heard yourself right two months ago, you were a mess. So just to have that impact on somebody that has been where I was, which was thinking I was dying, literally, it means a lot to me, and it makes me feel good. So Lloyd,

I'm sure you're super proud of how she's turned this journey into a calling. Oh, absolutely.

You know, we were, what, a year or so out of her last radiation treatment and going through to Methodist to one of our oncology checkups and and she was like, Yeah, we I really want to start looking to give back and to get involved with with KanCare. And so that's how, that's how that that ended up getting started was feeling good enough to to be able to offer that support, that that that she gives for sure.

Juan, you made a decision to serve too, just in a different way. Tell us a little bit about that journey for you.

So Jennifer and I decided to do the to be the volunteer together and and to be able to so that I can, she offers the support to newly diagnosed cancer patients. I went through the class to offer support to the caregivers of those, and going through the training was was really eye opening and a great experience for me personally. And Jennifer probably can attest to the same thing, and to be able to provide that support, the one on one, matching of me with a caregiver, I didn't feel like I was doing the greatest job of it, to be brutally honest. And so I kind of took a step back from that. But before I did that, a board position to be a part of the board of directors to make decisions toward the future of KanCare was offered, and I accepted, and I'm very grateful to be on the board to provide that kind of direction to to the future, and the vision of what KanCare is currently and what can care can be in the future. So yeah, well,

we're so grateful for your service. Well, thank you for that. From that board perspective, I'm curious. You know you've been on the board for little over four years now, what's been most. Significant to you, and just watching the journey of the organization and the impact you know that you've been able to have just kind of what stands out to you as being the most meaningful or powerful part of your experience as a board member.

Well, we've talked about the one on one, patient to client relationships, right, which, to me, are invaluable, and as a board member, have increasing that reach as to where we can have many, many, many more people that that can utilize the services that we provide. That to me, is in the scale that we're trying to bring the organization to become is is probably the biggest impact that that I think, that we're having as a board currently getting better at matching customer clients with with the volunteers that have been through similar journeys, being able to scale nationwide, instead of just in in a in a localish environment, being more productive as far as as as fundraising, and that way we can provide more more one on one interactions with with with those newly diagnosed, to me that that's the biggest impact is the is to where we are going to go into the very near future, as far as scaling up and using utilizing other resources, other than than, say, the manpower that it takes to do it, and utilizing More technology and that sort of thing to get that done. So that's that's the most, that's the thing that I'm most excited about.

Now. Our board members have such a heart to serve, and such a heart for wanting everyone experiencing the cancer journey, to have that survivor by your side experience that you had. Jennifer, I mean, there's such passion there for that, and so they're really working hard to ensure that we can serve more and more people, that anyone facing cancer can have a survivor by their side and and for that, I'm so grateful to each and every one of you. So you know you mentioned the training, the KanCare training. And I know we ask a question in the KanCare training that I'm going to ask you again now, because I think perspective over years and reflection changes. So Jennifer, what has been the gift of cancer? For you?

The gift of cancer has really made me a different person in a positive way. So when I say that I'm a better wife, a better mother, a better employee, like I'm a better person in general, because I faced what could have killed me, and just did it head on, and now I look at life totally different. So my perspective on life has changed, and I'm not so nervous anymore, you know, I just kind of take things as they come. I know Lloyd is very thankful about that, because worry wart, but I'm not that way anymore, and I think it's helped everyone around me and every part of my life, my kids and my husband, for sure, have benefited from that. And I kind of look at it because I got diagnosed close to 40, that it really was a calling that changed my life in a good way, in a good way there was now I deal with all the bad things still, but it's just made me a better person.

So let me, let me put a caveat in there. She does still worry, especially when I'm driving, and she's in the car, and a car puts on its brakes 400 yards in front of me and and she thinks I'm going to hit it from behind and get in a wreck. And so she's still doing that, so she still definitely worries about that.

Oh, there's some things like Lloyd that you can't control, right?

It's not always the best driver.

So Lloyd, I'll ask you the same question, I mean, and again, maybe your answer in 2018 is different than it is today. But what? What's the gift of cancer to you?

Well, for me, I've got a better wife and a better mother of my children, and much like what Jennifer was saying, is that I. Uh, the perspective of going through that battle and beating it. I mean, you'll never beat it, because it's, it's part of the journey, right? There's always going to be something. But she's a much better, much stronger person, the the the way that she handles adversity or things that that you and I can not necessarily, or she can't necessarily change, she handles that so much better. The anxiety levels are so much better than what they were before. For me, it was all about you. She would always sweat the small stuff, whether the small stuff is not small is small stuff now, yeah, and because she's beat the big stuff. And so that, that, to me, is the greatest gift that that cancer could have ever given, and showed just how strong we both were and how how good our relationship actually is so, yeah,

yeah, I think many people don't realize their own strength until they face cancer, whether on the survivor or the caregiver side. So Jennifer, as we wrap up here today, what message would you like for those listening who maybe they've been newly diagnosed, maybe they're in treatment, maybe they're on the other side of treatment, maybe they're a caregiver. You know, what message would you like to leave them with today?

Just don't lose hope. There's always something to be thankful for. I tell my clients that a lot just try to focus on things that are good still, because there's a lot of good in your life. And know that this is temporary. This the bad things are are temporary, and there is something beautiful on the other side. And I tell them, you know how I've changed, and that gives a lot of people a lot of hope. They're like, Thank you for telling me that, because I could never see myself getting there, yeah, but I couldn't either being here, I can tell them that.

Thank you. Thank you for being vulnerable today and sharing your story, and thank you for pouring into our cancer community and and just really sharing hope with so many people. Well, Darcy, thank

you for being such a great inspiration and a great leader into this organization. Where you're taking this organization is, is is is beyond anything that could be comprehended and and I'm truly grateful that you're the leader that you are. So thank you for that.

It is an honor and a privilege. So thank you so much for that. And we hope you will all come back and join us on our next episode of hope in the face of cancer.