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5 Steps to Develop Grit Without Burning Out
Episode 9013th March 2023 • The BraveHearted Woman • Dawn Damon
00:00:00 00:30:09

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 Great to be with you again, brave-hearted women. I love connecting. I love this time together. And by the way, if you also love these audio podcast episodes, I wanna let you know that my YouTube channel is now available. Dawn Damon, The Brave-Hearted Woman, and you can watch. And listen and learn and be motivated all at the same time. So I hope that you will take that time and listen.

If you love this program and you wanna send the message that this is important, please subscribe. Like me, follow me. Do all the things, hit the buttons, you know. Let the world know that the brave-hearted woman is available and we're moving and shaking, empowering you to live your best life. It's time for you to live full and free and bold and brave and courageous cuz you got stuff to do. God put all kinds of amazing things inside of you. You don't have time not to accomplish and fulfill your purpose on this earth.

Anyway, here's today. I'm coming to you from beautiful Mexico. It is gorgeous here, having a great time. But listen to you all what I put on my vision board at the beginning of last year was that I wanted to write a number-one bestselling book in a tropical, beautiful place. Well, guess what? That's what I'm doing right now.

Now, the number one bestselling book is yet to be seen. That still has to happen. I hope that you will sign up and register for your pre-release copy, but that's not the point. The point is that I'm following through with my vision. I'm writing this book in beautiful Mexico. It's warm and wonderful, but I saw it up here in my heart and my mind. I saw it in my spirit first. I wrote it down. and now I'm able to follow through. What's your vision? What have you written down? What can you see? You will see your vision twice. First, you will see it up here, the invisible place where no one else knows, just you and God ~ what you're dreaming about, what the Lord has put in your spirit, and then you will see it a second time as it manifests. So what are you believing? I hope that you're clear on that and you know, but I digress. That is not the subject of today's podcast, but that was really good, wasn't it?

In today's episode, I wanna talk to you about something else called ‘grit.’ Now I wanna let you know that before I even knew what a growth mindset was, I had one. I devoured books. I devoured CDs. I was so hungry for learning and growing and teaching, and I wanted anything I could get my hands on about motivation and excellence and overcoming obstacles and adversities, and I guess I just had to push myself when no one was looking, especially when no one was looking because I was doing it for me. I wanted to grow. I knew I needed to grow.

Actually, I feel like because of trauma in my childhood, I think most of my young adult life, my childhood, I was in a fog. And so when I got into my thirties, I was just starving and I was surprised at the amount of grit that began to develop in my life, like sticking to fitness, the ability to push the capacity for tenacity. I had that. So now it is not surprising that I wanna help you too. I wanna help push you. Push you in the tush. I wanna help you have the capacity for tenacity. I wanna encourage you not to give up. Don't quit. Keep going. We don't throw in the towel. We don't cry, uncle. We don't say, I can't do it. We have enough it can't. It's time to have some, I can like I can do this. I am an overcomer. I don't quit. I do fulfill my purpose. I do accomplish all my goals. I have valuable and worthy goals that are worth me pursuing. I will reach my destiny. All of those things, brave-hearted women are for you. Do not quit.

So today, as one person said, I don't know who to give credit to for this quote, but it is crawling is acceptable. Failing is acceptable. Falling is acceptable. Puking is acceptable. Crying is acceptable. Blood is acceptable. Sweat is acceptable. Pain is acceptable. But quitting on a worthy is not acceptable. So if your goals are honorable and worth your time and effort to pursue. In other words, they're worth waiting for.

Then at some point in life, you're gonna need grit. You're gonna need this commodity called resilience, grit, and perseverance to keep going because what is worth having is hard work. The good stuff is hard. It's difficult, but it's so worth your time and your effort. So Webster's Dictionary defines grit as courage and resolves courage like the strength of character. But we know, many of you are familiar with it, and I've read the book by Angela Duckworth called Grit: The Power of Passion & Perseverance. She is an author and psychologist who studied. The thing called grit for success. Like how important is grit? What's the role that grit plays in being successful? And she says, grit is passion and perseverance. It's like I almost have to giggle a little bit. It's like a love child. Grit is the love child of passion and perseverance. She says grit is stamina. It is sticking. Your future day in and day out, not just for a week, not just for a month, sometimes for years, and working really hard to make that future a reality. That's what grit is. She says grit keeps a person going when they feel down or a task seems impossible. With grit, one can accomplish difficult tasks without getting given. It's a strength of character that keeps a person going. Think of it as this popular phrase, she says, when the going gets tough, the tough get going.

So, in other words, she says the ingredients in grit are passion and perseverance. I'd like to add one more. I'm gonna call it resilience too. Passion, perseverance, and resilience. So let's kind of look at the anatomy of grit and break this down.

Perseverance is defined as the continued effort to do. To achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition, is perseverance. This is endurance. We understand what it means. You create the emotion of perseverance when you become determined and persistent and steadfast, and you decide to turn obstacles into opportunities. You are tapping into perseverance. Perseverance is a spiritual commodity that you can receive from God. He can give you that touch, that stamina, that endurance. But it is also something that you cultivate and create and you do it through good self-talk that says, I won't. This is important. I will keep going.

I'm gonna give you some clues in just a moment on how to cultivate perseverance. But it starts when you enter any trial. Perseverance starts. It works when you are facing an obstacle and you have a choice. I'm either gonna dig in and keep going, or I'm gonna turn tuck tail and run. But you're a brave-hearted woman, so you're not running, you're not leaving. You are going to stand firm. You are gonna flex some emotional muscle and say, I'm not a quitter. Now, quitting is a habit, by the way. It's just something that you do because you're afraid of failure, defeat, and shame. Hard work. You might have a lazy bone in you that says, ‘Uh, it's not worth it.’ I wanna tell you why you quit instead of pressing in. But perseverance says, ‘When adversity strikes, I am going to endure. I am going to stand up under trial without crumbling because I can. And with God's help, I shall stand.’ So when you choose perseverance, you will grow.

The Bible talks a lot about perseverance, but it is twofold. Not only do you grow in the strength of character, but you get your results too. You get the reward, you get the prize, and you reach your goals. So you have to have this thing called perseverance, which is the one ingredient I'm gonna give you three. It's the first ingredient of grit. You gotta persevere.

Then you need passion. It's Winston Churchill says, ‘Success consists of going from failure to failure without the loss of enthusiasm.’ Now, if you've listened to me for any length of time, you know that enthusiasm is actually one of my favorite words, and in fact, part of my core value for life. You have to be enthusiastic. You have to have passion. Never let the flame go out. Keep the fire burning in your soul and spirit. Pity the person who has lost passion for life, for your goals, for your dreams. You were made to contain the fire and you can get your fire back if your fire's gone out.

If life has to beat you up, if you've experienced some really deep disappointments, if you have experienced loss in your grieving, on the other side of grieving grieve, do your hard work because on the other side is a spark.

Flame. A small fire will start from a tiny, tiny ember that's still in your spirit. God's word tells us, I will not extinguish a smoldering wick. No, he will not put out your flame as long as you're on this earth. So what? We need is to blow on that ember and create that fire. Keep your fire ablaze. Focus on the wind. Keep your drive and your commitment going forward. Don't let distractions dim your light. Don't let disappointments snuff you out. Because you are called to the work that you're passionate about or that you were passionate about. Now distractions will zap your energy. It is a tool of the enemy to steal and squander your gift. So give your best hours and your best energy to the thing that you're called to the endeavor that you want to. Don't give leftovers to your purpose. You give your best. So passion is also a part of this grit. Perseverance with passion, with fire. ‘Oh, can you feel it? Can you sense it?’ Grit. I'm gonna keep going and I'm passionate about it.

Then I like to add the word resilience too because resilience has a different connotation. Yes, it is perseverance, but it's your ability to spring back. Resilience ~ think about something flexible, it's resilient. In other words, it can take a beating and come back quickly. How fast can you spring back from disappointment or failure? How quickly can you pivot or adjust? How fast can you reframe misfortune to mean something for your good and for your benefit? So resilience begins to carve away the weaknesses of our soul that make us think about quitting. Resilience says, mm, I'm not gonna. I'm gonna get back. It's like the palm tree that has that comeback spirit that keeps going spirit.

Do you know the palm tree, right? The palm tree in the storm. The palm tree can just really, absolutely, almost touch ground. This tree is a lofty, beautiful, 90-foot palm tree that can be right down on the ground. But a few hours later you'll drive by that same palm tree, walk by that tree, and you'll notice, ‘Oh, guess what? Here it comes again.’ And it just says, ‘I'm back.’ Because the palm tree has been designed to withstand the storm. Its roots go down very, very deep and its trunk is very resilient. So when the storms come, it doesn't break and snap because it's rooted and it's flexible. You are rooted, you are flexible. That's what resilience is. It doesn't give up. It comes back. It gets back up. And resilience is kind of like that commander-in-chief that bellows to the discouraged heart of yours. It says, ‘You're not quitting. Get back in there. Give me 10. Gimme 11. Gimme one more. You don't quit. Get back and do it again,’ kind of that coach, Can you hear it? The coach that says you're not quitting.

How does grit respond to adversity? This three-strand chord is resilience, perseverance, and passion, all working together to have you keep going so that the goals that you have on your dream board, on your vision board, though they tear. You have the ability to wait for them to keep moving forward, to keep believing even when it's been a long time, you don't need. For goals that are easy, low-hanging fruit. You don't need the grit to get something that's quickly done, but you need the grit to get something that's long-term.

Now, I'm not suggesting that you ever stick around for toxicity abuse. You don't endure abuse, you don't endure things that are unhealthy for you. You get out not referring to. But I am referring to worthy goals, honorable goals that are healthy for you, that make sense for you. You're going to need the grit to stay with it to reach something. because the longer it takes to get something, probably the more valuable it is. And honestly, the more you're gonna appreciate it.

I have a friend right now who has lost, I don't think she's hit the 100 mark. I know she's going for it, but she has lost 90 pounds. Do you think she got there overnight? No, she didn't. Do you think there was some? You bet there was. Do you think there were some days when she wanted to say, this isn't worth it? Absolutely. You think rationalizations and whispers, and you bet her brain was probably filled with all kinds of things all the time. Well, I know it was all the time, but what she had was a vision. She had a picture not only just in her mind, but on her vision board. She could see herself. She had enough moments and was tired of being tired. She was sick of being sick, and she said, I can't live like this anymore. And she got a picture of a preferred future, a better her. She could see it, and she went after it. Not only could she see it, but she devised a plan on how to get there. It was a noble plan, a good plan, and she started incrementally. Applying her plan and executing the hard things, doing, saying no, choosing her hard. We always say, ‘You can choose your hard.’ You can have a hard now, or you can have a hard later. Hard now with saying no to the sweets and the treats and the food that everybody else got to eat. But now she's reaped the reward because she didn't. She's on the other side of it. Yeah, it was hard work, but she's a new person. It's amazing. And it's not just because, ‘Oh, you look better, her confidence is soared. Her body is healthy, her energy has gone up, and her lungs can breathe. She doesn't, she's not panting, because she just took a flight of steps.

So listen, y'all, maybe it's not a weight loss goal. Maybe it's writing your memoir, maybe it's telling you. Maybe it's saving for a vacation or a new home, whatever it is. So what happens when your goal is here and you are here and you have a matrix of opposition that you have to work your way through? Well, you need grit now when you face the opposition. I wanna give you a few steps, five steps on how you operate with.

So, here's the thing, and again, grit starts the minute you face opposition. The minute you have a goal that you want, that's gonna be long term, you're gonna have to employ this thing called grit. This muscle, this emotional muscle. So you've got a goal, you're in a storm, and you wanna quit.

Number one, listen to your inner dialog. Because if you're feeling discouraged and you've got some emotions that say, ‘I wanna quit,’ then that means you've been fellowshipping with some thoughts. You've got some negative thoughts that have slipped through. You didn't capture 'em, you didn't identify 'em, you didn't hear 'em, and now they're producing feelings, and those feelings are negative. So listen to your inner dialogue. Are you whispering thoughts of defeat? Are you having conversations that, this is so stupid, why did I think I could do this? This was a bad idea, to begin with, okay?

Pay attention to that. Start to celebrate. Don't feel defeated. Know that. And guess what? You're actually entering transformation and you're uprooting some old habits. That's why the whispers start. That's why the voices start because you're getting scary. You're starting to make changes, and your brain, ‘Oh, and the enemy doesn't like it.’ Our flesh doesn't like change. Of course, not. So listen to your inner dialogue, capture those negative thoughts, and align them with your vision quickly reframe those thoughts to positive I am statements. I am enough. I can do all things through Christ. I am going to reach my goal. I am strong. I am bold.

All right, number two. Set your mind on the win. Focus on the win. Remind yourself what is the reward. So connect with your why. Why do I want this goal? Why do I wanna keep going? How will my life change? How will it be better? Why did I think in the beginning this was something that I wanted? What were the benefits that I thought I could have if I reached this goal? Write them down. Tape them on your mirror. Look at them often. Grit requires passion. Stay passionate about your goal. Remember why you want it. Keep that fire burning, okay? The outcomes that you want and that you expect, are worth it. You do not quit. They are worth it.

Number three, analyze your situation. We don't use grit just to plow through without understanding what is it that I'm facing. Do I need to adjust? Do I need to pivot? Am I in this trial because I'm maybe going around this or going after my goal the wrong way? I can adjust.

Remember Winston Churchill's saying, ‘Failure after failure, without losing enthusiasm.’ Maybe you're discovering it's not gonna work this way and you're hitting a roadblock because your plan is faulty. You just need to adjust it. Make some modifications. To analyze the situation. What can I do? What can I stop doing? What can I improve? Act immediately. Don't keep hitting your head against the same pivot, okay?

Number four, recognize you are not powerless. You are not a victim. Control what you can con control. Control what you should control. Don't control everything. You can't anyway. It's an illusion but lives within your circle of control. There's much more joy there anyway, release the obligation to run everybody else's life and make everything perfect. You can't do that anyway. , it's a fallacy, and all it does is, is create anxiety for you, but you are not powerless.

Guess what? You may not have chosen this adversity or this trial, but you do get to choose your attitude, right? You do get to choose. You absolutely get to choose. How you wanna feel and what you wanna think. Feelings come and emotions come, but you get to decide what do I wanna do with this. Do I wanna sit in this and sulk? Or do I wanna shake it off? Change my physiology, get moving, and empower myself. So you're not a victim. Don't live as a victim. No control what you can control. and release the rest.

And then finally, number five, when you face these trials, when your goal is there and you are here and there's this matrix in between you, stay grateful and be thankful. Name your blessings. Count your blessings, speak them out loud. Thank God for all that he's given you because endurance is not enough, but endurance with that's the winning combination. Grit with joy, grit, passion, perseverance, and resilience with joy, because nobody wants to be around you in your bad mood. Nope. We don't. I don't, nobody wants to be around me when I'm being, ornery and angry and frustrated. No, we gotta say, ‘I woke up this morning. I have three amazing children. I have five of me. I have eight amazing children. I have three children. I have two beautiful stepsons, and I have three sons and daughter-in-laws. I have 12 grandchildren. I have a great-granddaughter. I am blessed in amazing ways. I am grateful, and I will keep going,’ let me say this again.

I'm gonna give you a quote from Chola. I'm not saying that right, but American Astronaut, ‘the path from dreams to success does exist. May you have the vision to find it, the courage to get onto it, and the perseverance to follow it.’ What a great quote! The dream of your success does exist. May you have the grit to get on it, the grit to stay with it, and the grit to keep following it till you reach your goal.

All right, so we're gonna make some declarations today. I want you to listen to this and write these down, and then you can quote them yourself.

“Circumstances or fearful events, do not move me. The journey does not weary me. I am patient. In waiting, I persevere. I press on. I do not quit. I am strengthened with power, prepared to endure, and persevere with joy. I am diligent and I finish what I start. I'm strong in adversity. I persevere under trial. I persevere and I gain a successful life. I do this because God is with me. He is my strength. I am not alone. I am not defeated. I am not abandoned. I will reach my God-given goals.”

Do you agree with that? I hope so. Today you might be facing a challenge. What are you gonna do about it? What would you like to change? Who can help you?

~ I'm available if you need a coach. If not me someone, but I wanna let you know today that if you don't even have written goals, if you've given up together, if the discouragement of life has really beat you up, and if you are on the verge of saying, what's the use?

I wanna encourage you, my brave-hearted sister, that once again, you get that journal, you get along with God and you, and you ask, What is my purpose? What am I to fulfill? What is the gift that you've given me, Lord, that you want me to use? And how can I change someone else's life? How can I serve you in the best way possible? Write down, that's your vision. That's what you're to do. Make those goals. Make those steps. Go after it. Keep that fire burning. I'd love to help you. You can visit or

I actually have a free gift I wanna give you. This month's free gift is called the Brave Vision Blast Off Workbook. It’s something that will help you reach those goals just as we're talking about. All right. That's what I've got for you today.

Don't forget to follow me, like me, and subscribe. And I'm gonna leave you like I always do. This is Dawn Damon, the Braveheart mentor, encouraging you to find you're brave and live your dreams!