This episode dives into the transformative power of prayer as the lifeline to one's relationship with Jesus, and practical steps to integrate prayer into daily life. It explores various prayer methods such as contemplative prayer and Ignatian meditation, highlighting the importance of sincerity and consistency in prayer. Practical tips are provided for building a daily prayer life, emphasizing the need to prioritize time with God, establish a routine, and seek guidance from the Holy Spirit. By addressing challenges like distractions and sins, this episode offers encouragement and advice to strengthening one's faith through prayer.

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Hey, I'm your host, Mari Wagner,

and you're listening to the ever be

2

podcast where faith meets lifestyle.

3

I'm so excited you're here, whether you're

a new listener or a longtime follower,

4

I know there's something here for you.

5

Pull up a chair and listen

in for insightful real life

6

conversations and actionable steps

on how to claim the Full life.

7

God created you for if you're a

woman desiring to live a Christ

8

centered life in today's modern

world, then this is for you.

9

Welcome to the ever be podcast.

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mari-wagner_2_04-23-2024_183235:

Hey, hey, everybody.

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Welcome back.

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I hope your Wednesday is going great, or

maybe you're listening to this first thing

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in the morning, and I hope that you have

an amazing day today, it's the middle of

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the week, you're almost at the weekend,

and I hope that this makes your week a

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little bit sweeter, a little bit better.

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We are going to talk about prayer today.

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This is one of my favorite

topics to talk about.

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It is going to be such

a jam packed episode.

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I have so many resources

to share with you.

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I literally have My stack

of books right here.

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I've got the catechism

of the Catholic church.

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I have the Holy Bible, obviously.

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And then I have my notes from my mass

journal from a homily that the priest

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literally gave this past weekend on

prayer that I was like, wow, this is so

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Holy Spirit led, um, that the priest is

talking about this because I was already

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planning on this episode to be on prayer.

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Um, so that's great.

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We're really going to get into it.

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And I hope that you learn so much from it.

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I think this is a really

important conversation to have.

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I think there's a lot of

misconceptions around prayer.

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I think there's a lot of questions

in general around prayer.

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Like what is prayer?

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Why is it important?

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How do I do it?

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all those kinds of things.

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We're going to get into all

that today, but the baseline.

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Like truth that I want us to work off

of today that I want you to know in

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your heart and walk away like living,

breathing, knowing is that prayer is the

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lifeline to your relationship with Jesus.

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Let me say that again.

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Prayer is the lifeline to

your relationship with Jesus.

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I didn't know this for a long time.

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And so when I used to hear, Oh,

I have a relationship with Jesus.

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Or when I used to get asked, do

you have a relationship with Jesus?

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I would think, well, yeah, of course.

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I mean, it's.

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Like I, I love him.

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I, I quote unquote know him, although I

didn't really know the person of Jesus.

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I just knew who he was

kind of like as a figure.

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, and I came to learn that prayer

is the form of communication.

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It's the, the route and the vehicle

that allows us to know God, to know

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who he is and therefore to have

a relationship with him, because

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relationship is a deep two sided thing.

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It's not just a one sided thing.

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I think for so long, I kind of had,

maybe had a one sided relationship

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with the Lord, which I don't

really even know what side it was.

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Maybe it was like him loving

me probably, and me not really

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like putting anything back.

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Um, but relationship

takes two, it's two sided.

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So today we're going to get into that.

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Why prayers are lifeline to Jesus.

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Why is what's going to help you build

your relationship with the Lord?

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, so come Holy spirit, please allow

these to be your words that are spoken.

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Not mine.

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And I pray that this, uh,

just touches your heart.

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So let's start off with

the basic question.

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What is prayer?

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Okay.

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That's where we need to start.

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Um, and first I want to ask

you, what do you think of

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when you hear the word prayer?

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Take a second to think about that.

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I just want you to think kind of

like first instinct, first thoughts.

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What do you think of when

you hear the word prayer?

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Because I know for the longest time

when I heard that I jumped to what

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I now know is called rote prayers.

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Um, the basically these

like beautiful, like.

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Pre written prayers that the church

has given us that have been passed

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down for generations and, you know,

through the whole tradition of the

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church, or given to us by Jesus

himself, like the, our father, right?

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That is a written prayer that we memorize

that we can just pray that we can take

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out of our little, like, you know,

pocket when we need it, a rote prayer

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that is like pre written for us, , words

that are given to us to pray to the

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father or to ask him or to praise him,

whatever it is, that is a rote prayer.

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Versus something like free form prayer.

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That's a different kind of prayer.

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But when I used to hear the word

prayer, I kind of always jumped

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to those prewritten prayers, those

rote prayers, the hail Mary, the our

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father glory be maybe the rosary.

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, but free form prayer is the Also

prayer and free form prayer.

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There's a lot of different

ways to describe it.

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We're going to get into it.

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But right now I just want to

call it like free form prayer.

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Cause I think it's the easiest way

to understand what that is when you

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compare it to kind of like a pre written

prayer or like a prayer that's been,

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you know, passed down in the tradition

of the church, like the rosary.

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Like I said, , free form prayer

is mental prayer from the heart.

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It's really what it sounds like.

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It's freedom in how you pray in what you

pray and how you communicate to the Lord.

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There is no right or wrong

way to speak to the Lord.

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And it's just a speaking from the heart.

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St.

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Therese of Lisieux, I know you love

her because who doesn't, right?

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There's a quote by her that

I love that says, for me,

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prayer is a surge of the heart.

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It is a simple look towards heaven.

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It is a cry of recognition and

love embracing both trial and joy.

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St.

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Therese bless you.

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And what I love most about this quote

is the beginning where it says, for

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me, prayer is a surge of the heart.

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And if we look in our

catechism, let me get that up.

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Um, the catechism of the Catholic

church is the big book of everything.

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It's the big book that breaks

down all of the teachings of the

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church, the traditions of the

church, why we do what we do.

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, so it's a great resource

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So we are going to open up to

the catechism, paragraph, , 2

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And I'm just going to read this.

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So the title says prayer as a covenant.

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Um, so this whole section of the

catechism is, is huge on prayer.

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So just highly recommend starting there in

general, but we're going to start at this,

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this paragraph prayer as a covenant.

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, it says, where does prayer come from?

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Whether prayer is expressed in words

or gestures, is the whole man who

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but in naming the source of prayer.

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Scripture speaks sometimes of the

soul or the spirit, but most often of

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the heart more than a thousand times.

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According to scripture, it

is the heart that praise.

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If our heart is far from God,

the words of prayer are in vain.

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So it is the heart that praise.

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And we see that in scripture and

it is said over a thousand times.

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And like this said, like sometimes the

soul is mentioned or the spirit, but

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in the end prayer is from the heart.

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Prayer is a conversation with God from

our heart So I just want to start with

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that first because I know that when

we hear the word prayer or you know

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Prayer routine or whatever it can sound

really intimidating It could sound like

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there's a right way or a wrong way to

do it And I'm glad that you're here

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and you are gonna learn a lot from this

episode There's definitely something to

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learn and to take away but I do I want

you to walk away knowing essentially,

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like I said, prayer is your lifeline to

your relationship with Jesus and prayer

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is nothing but a surge of your heart.

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It's nothing but a

conversation from the heart.

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I want you to walk away knowing

that prayer is your lifeline in

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your relationship with Jesus.

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And that prayer is nothing but a surge

of the heart, a movement of the heart,

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a conversation from your heart with God.

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Essentially, it's just a conversation

with our father in heaven, right?

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Our creator.

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And it's a vehicle, a gift that really,

that he's given us to be able to connect

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with him, to know him, to speak to him.

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And a lot of the times to hear him as

well, maybe not physically like audibly,

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but to hear him in our hearts and to hear

him speak to us and speak into our lives.

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And again, in the catechism, it literally

says prayer is the living relationship

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of the children of God with their father.

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Okay.

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We need to understand this to understand

something about prayer that we are

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children of the father, God the father.

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Is our father, our heavenly

father, and we are his children.

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So

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if you've never heard this before, you

know, let me be the first to tell you

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like, this is your truest identity.

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You are a son or daughter of God.

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It is said in scripture a million times.

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The Lord said it himself.

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Um, let's look at scripture really quick.

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So open your Bibles up to first John.

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, three verse one.

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Okay.

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It says, see what love the father

has bestowed upon us that we may

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be called the children of God.

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Yet.

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So we are.

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That was in this past Sunday's reading.

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, I believe it was the second

reading and I love, love that verse

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Because it doesn't just state that we are

children of God, but it also says that it

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comes from a love of the father, right?

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It says, see what love the father has for

us, the love that he's bestowed upon us.

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That we may be called

children, children of God yet.

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So we are, , and the priest in his homily

this past Sunday at mass brought this

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verse up in his homily about prayer and

asked this question, what impact does that

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fact, does that truth have on our life?

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Okay.

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So we are children of God.

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We are sons and daughters of God.

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What is the impact that

that truth has on our life?

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Why does that even matter

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And friends, it matters because

this is our deepest and truest

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identity without prayer.

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We cannot connect with he who created us.

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He who our identity is rooted in

our father in heaven without prayer.

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We are dead.

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We can't connect with the source

of our life because prayer, like

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I said, is our communion with God.

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In John 15, Jesus says, you can

do nothing apart from me, right?

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And so who are we to think that we can

do our life, that we can do everything

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he's called us to do apart from him.

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Sure.

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The Lord is with us.

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He never abandons us, but prayer is

this avenue that we can be in union with

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him and invite him in an intentional,

deep, intimate way into our life so

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that he can speak life, breathe life,

give us grace so that we can fulfill

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this life that he has called us to live.

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Okay, so I hope that we have

established some, some really good

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basic principles as to like why prayer

is important, and what prayer is?

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So let's talk a little bit about the

importance of a daily routine because

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it is beautiful to say prayers from the

heart, you know, when you feel prompted

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to do so, But I would say that it's

more important to build a consistent

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daily routine, even if you don't feel

like praying, or even if prayer isn't

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coming easy to you, it's more important

to build that daily routine and to

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make time for Jesus every single day

than to just pray when you feel like it.

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Because otherwise you can't really get to

know God and I always use this analogy.

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I call it the best friend analogy

Okay, so think of your best friend

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and think of how you got to the place

that you are in your relationship with

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them How did you get to know them?

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So well, how did you get so close?

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How did you get to trust them?

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You probably spent a lot

of time with them them.

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You probably shared some really

deep moments together or celebrated

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some big wins in your life or,, went

through difficult times whatever it

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was, you shared life with this person

and you shared enough life with this

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person that they became significant

to you and you developed a deep

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personal relationship with them.

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And like I said, this all happened

through time that was spent and things

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that were shared between you guys,

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things from your heart and

your life, , et cetera.

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And so just like you needed to spend a

lot of time with this person to develop

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a relationship, the same goes for Jesus.

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You need to put that same kind

of time and energy and commitment

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into your relationship with Jesus,

because he is a real person.

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You can't have a real like living

relationship with him, but without

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the time, without the commitment,

without, The time invested in him,

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you're not going to get there.

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And the reason I say this is because

I hear this a lot from women, , you

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know, who say like, Mari, I do pray.

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I do spend time in prayer.

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I listen to worship music when I'm driving

to work or, I say a little prayer on

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my way to class in the morning or, , my

prayer right now is doing the dishes.

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Like that's how I'm praying

and don't get me wrong.

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These are all good and beautiful things.

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And I hope that if you do this,

that you continue to do this.

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It is prayer, but it isn't

the true substance of prayer.

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That's going to really deepen and, and

develop your relationship with Jesus.

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Because if we go back to this best

friend analogy, if the only time that

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you spent with this friend was in the

car while you're playing music, on your

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way to work and all the time you spent

with them in the car was, you know,

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kind of trying to talk over the music

or talking between songs, you wouldn't

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really get a lot in there and your

relationship wouldn't really deepen.

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Right.

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Or if the only time you

spent with them was.

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Walking to class, and you might have

some of these friends, some of these

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friends that like, you're in class and

the only real connection that you have

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is, having this class together and

walking to and from this class together.

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, but you don't really go deep with

them in that time that's allotted

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walking from building to building.

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So if you look at that in your

relationship with Jesus, if the only

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time you spend with Jesus is in those

short increments of time where you're

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either distracted or multitasking,

you're doing something else, um, it's

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a beautiful way to, you know, bring

Jesus into your everyday life, but

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still he deserves all of your attention.

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He deserves undivided attention

and times to decide for you

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to know him and love him.

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And this kind of brings me to

the very first commandment.

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You shall have no other gods before me.

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Now that wording is particular

and just hearing that we might

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not think, , that we are outwardly

worshiping other gods, right?

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It says, you shall not have

any other gods before me.

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Essentially you shall not worship

anyone else, any other God or thing

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or being other than me, the Lord.

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And we might think that we don't have

other gods and that we don't worship

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other things except for God himself.

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In the way that we think, I will challenge

you to think about this and reflect

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about this in your life because there's

been moments in my life where I have

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realized, oh crap, I do have other idols.

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Oh shoot.

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I might actually find other things

more important, might, you know,

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underlyingly be worshiping other things

more than the Lord or over the Lord.

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And ultimately we can see that

when we look at what do we love?

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And usually what we love, is what

we spend time on, what we deem

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to be important in our lives.

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That's worthy of our time and attention.

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And if we only give our time to,

maybe work our careers, social

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media, friends, family, our kids, our

spouse, our schoolwork our home, our

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investments, whatever it is, um, those

all aren't inherently bad things.

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A lot of them are really good things, but

if we only give our time there, then where

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does God stand against all those things?

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Where does God stand in the

midst of those priorities?

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If the first thing we do when we get out

of bed is roll over and start scrolling,

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where does God stand next to Instagram?

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Or maybe we're drowning in work and it's

a busy season maybe you're traveling

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a lot, maybe you're have a list full

of to do's that you know that you

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need to get to all the time and that's

all you feel like you have time for.

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So where does God stand in

the midst of all those things?

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He has provided for us a job, a home, a

family, the means to travel, to be busy.

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The health to be able to do

these things with our bodies

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to not have any other gods Above

God is to love God above all

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things It's to place God as number

one on our list of priorities

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And to love God above all things to

make him the very first priority in

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our lives is to give him our first and

last moments of the day at the very

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least, at the very least you guys.

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Minimum, we should be giving him our

first and last moments of the day.

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When we first open our eyes, maybe

a quick, , prayer of gratitude.

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And before we close our eyes and go to

bed, a prayer of Thanksgiving, a praise

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of intercession for our lives or for the

people in our lives, at the very least,

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you know, and some of this might

be kind of a humility check for us.

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I know that it has been for me many times

before to kind of look at my life and

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realize like, wow, there are a lot of

other things in my life that I actually

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am placing above the Lord that are

actually taking priority above the Lord.

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And it may not sit right in my

heart when I say that you may

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feel like, no, but I do love God.

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And I get that.

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I bet you that you do.

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So many times I felt the same thing.

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And yet I say, but I don't

have time for him right now.

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I love him, but I don't have time.

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I love him, but this work is so important.

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I love him, but I have so many things

on my calendar that I have to get to.

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I can't, don't really have time for mass

or time for prayer or whatever it is.

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And so it takes a moment of humility

for us to recognize that first of all.

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And actually, if we go back to

the catechism, it says humility

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is a foundation of prayer.

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We're opening up the catechism again.

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Okay.

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And we're going to paragraph

two, five, five, nine.

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It's called prayer as God's gift.

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And it says prayer is the raising of

one's mind and heart to God, or the

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requesting of good things from God.

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That's a really simple way to put prayer.

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But when we pray, do we speak from

the height of our pride and our

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will, or out of the depths of a

humble and contrite heart, he who

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humbles himself will be exalted.

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Humility is the foundation of prayer.

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Only when we humbly acknowledge

that we do not know how to pray

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as we ought, are we ready to

receive freely the gift of prayer.

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Man is a beggar before God.

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Wow.

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That is so good.

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Humility is the foundation of prayer.

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That just brings me back to

John at 15, five apart from me.

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You can do nothing.

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Think believe the lie that the evil

one tells us all the time that we don't

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need God, especially in our world today.

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We're so obsessed with.

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productivity and success and making

it and whatever it is that we're

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doing, that we feel like we can do

everything ourselves, that all of

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our success, all of our goodness, all

of our good fortune comes from us.

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And this is just a reminder.

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Man is a beggar before God.

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Humility is a foundation of prayer.

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We need Lord.

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We can't do anything apart from the Lord.

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And prayer is this vehicle for us to

beg him to, to give us his grace, his

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mercy, his blessings upon our life.

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And so when we approach prayer, we want

to come to him with a humble heart,

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with a contrite heart, and an open

heart to receive whatever he has for us.

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Okay, so I hope that establishes,

, again, a little bit of context

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as to why a prayer is important.

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, why taking the time to speak to

him daily is important to allow

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silence and space for him to be

a character in our lives, right?

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To allow him to have authority and say

in our lives, or to just comfort us and

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bring us love and peace and understanding.

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And to just be with him, to be

with our father, to be with our

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creator, whom is love himself, to

experience love and peace himself.

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He wants all of it.

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You guys, he wants to be

with you in all of it.

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And so before we get into the

practicals of how to pray, I want

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to say this, I want to say that

you don't have to come to the Lord.

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, in a polished way, you don't have

to have the most beautiful, most

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perfect words to say when you come

to him in prayer, you just have to

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be yourself and it can be messy.

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It can be raw.

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It can be confusing.

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You can be honest.

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He wants all of you.

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He wants to be so intimately invested

in your life as your father, because

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you are his child and he loves you and

that's it because he loves you because

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he loves you because he loves you.

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That's the only reason he wants to

be so intimately a part of your life.

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The reason he leaves the 99

for the one for you, right?

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It's just because he loves you.

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So how do we pray?

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How do we receive this love from God?

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How do we give him our love?

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It's important to recognize that

prayer in itself is a response to God.

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Okay.

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So like we just said, The Lord wants

to be a part of your life and it is

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he who initiates the conversation.

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Now, this doesn't mean that you have to

wait to hear God's voice to begin to pray.

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No, him by his very being, love itself.

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And through that love

created you, he loves you.

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And he is always reaching for you

and taking that step towards you.

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inviting you and asking

you to draw near to him.

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I can't seem to put this catechism down.

394

Okay.

395

So I'm going to read one

more paragraph from here.

396

That is so, so, so good.

397

Paragraph two, five, six, seven.

398

God calls man first man may forget his

creator or hide far from his face.

399

He may run after idols or accuse

the deity of having abandoned

400

him Yet, the living and true God

tirelessly calls each person to that

401

mysterious encounter known as prayer.

402

In prayer, the faithful God's

initiative of love always comes first.

403

Our own first step is always a response.

404

Okay?

405

So prayer is a response to his initial

step towards us, his initial love for us.

406

As God gradually reveals himself

and reveals man to himself.

407

Prayer appears as a reciprocal call, a

covenant drama through words and actions.

408

This drama engages the heart.

409

It unfolds throughout the

whole history of salvation.

410

Mm.

411

There's so much to unpack here.

412

So much to unpack here.

413

Okay.

414

What can we take from this?

415

God calls man first.

416

. Again, we just talked about this, but I

think it's so important to remember this.

417

You are not abandoned by the Lord.

418

If you feel like you are alone,

if you feel like the Lord has

419

never reached out to you, doesn't

love you, doesn't know you.

420

I'm here to tell you that that's not true.

421

He knows you.

422

He knows every fiber of your being.

423

We see this in the good shepherd, right?

424

He leaves the 99 to go after

the one God calls man first.

425

He goes after you.

426

He calls you to him and waits and

invites you to respond because he

427

desires a personal relationship with us.

428

He's not a distant figure that

doesn't want anything to do with you.

429

He wants to meet you in a personal

and intimate way and walk with

430

you intimately in your life.

431

And so through prayer.

432

God reveals himself.

433

We saw that in this last paragraph,

God reveals himself through prayer and

434

this living relationship with God, we

can learn about him, about who he is

435

and who he wants to be in our lives.

436

And furthermore, God reveals

man to himself through prayer.

437

God being our creator and knowing us

more than we know ourselves, knowing our

438

humanity more than we know it ourselves.

439

He reveals our own selves to us.

440

He reveals to us who we truly

are, who we are made in his image

441

and what our truest identity is.

442

And you guys, we can find all

of those answers through prayer.

443

This is the craziest thing.

444

Like prayer isn't just this like

boring thing that you just like repeat

445

out of a book and you know, be done.

446

It's this living, breathing relationship.

447

Okay.

448

Okay.

449

Now we're really, really, really

going to get into how to pray.

450

I want to talk about the

different types of prayer.

451

Because there's a lot of them.

452

Like I said, there's no

right or wrong way to pray.

453

There's a lot of types of prayer.

454

And I love the church, the Catholic

church, especially because she gives us

455

so many different options and teaches

us so many different avenues to pray.

456

And it's great because

we're all different people.

457

We all have different personalities,

different temperaments, different ways

458

that we can each connect with God.

459

And so you're not limited to just one.

460

Okay.

461

There's contemplative prayer, Ignatian

prayer, scripture study, lexio divina,

462

prayer journaling, meditative prayer,

like all these different types of prayers.

463

So we're going to get into contemplative

prayer first because I think this one can

464

kind of carry us through the other ones.

465

And if you've never prayed anything,

but like a Hail Mary or Our Father,

466

this is definitely the place to start.

467

So St.

468

Teresa of Avila, she is a

doctor of prayer in the church.

469

And she says that contemplative

prayer is nothing but a close

470

sharing between friends.

471

It means taking time frequently

to be alone with him who loves us.

472

I also call this mental prayer.

473

You hear this a lot, you know,

contemplative prayer, mental prayer.

474

I think it's like kind

of used interchangeably.

475

But really it's nothing else than

just sharing what's on your heart,

476

you know, plainly, simply in your

own words, what is on your heart?

477

What are you feeling?

478

What are you asking of the Lord?

479

And the important thing is not to think

much about it, not to overthink how

480

you're saying things or what you're

saying, but just to do it out of love

481

and just to offer it all to the Lord.

482

I was listening to Sadie

Robertson's podcast the other day.

483

And the guest that she was interviewing

was talking about how somebody

484

said something about prayer to her

in college that stuck with her.

485

And I think that it's really good advice.

486

She was told that, Good prayer

is like unfiltered prayer.

487

Like you don't have a prayer voice.

488

You don't have like a, nice

polished way of coming to the Lord.

489

It's just using your real voice, your

real thoughts, your real feelings

490

in an unfiltered way, obviously with

respect, but like just coming to the

491

Lord as you are not worrying about

how you're wording things, but just

492

saying it and just coming to the Lord

as you are, as honestly as you can.

493

And so contemplative prayer or mental

prayer, can be you sitting down, in

494

a chair, in a pew, and just sitting

there looking at the Lord and being

495

like, Hey Lord, It's me, you know,

um, I don't really know you very well,

496

uh, but I'd like to, or maybe you're

like, Hey Lord, um, it's been a long

497

time, you know, but I'm finally here

and, and this is what's on my heart

498

and this is what I'm struggling with.

499

And can you help me, can you show

me the way, you know, that that's

500

just an example of what you can say.

501

It doesn't have to be fancy or anything.

502

Contemplative prayer can also be silent in

a way, like you don't have to use words.

503

It can be as simple as.

504

allowing your gaze to be fixed

on Jesus, to contemplate his love

505

for you his mercy, his face, his

heart, whatever you're drawn to.

506

It's time spent in silence, allowing

the Lord to clear your mind of

507

distractions and open your heart to him.

508

Okay.

509

So now we're going to get

into Ignatian meditation.

510

It is one of my favorite types of prayer.

511

Essentially it's a, is

purely imaginative prayer.

512

Where you visualize your

prayer instead of speaking it.

513

The style of prayer was taught by St.

514

Ignatius, St.

515

Ignatius of Loyola, and he uses

it in his spiritual exercises.

516

Basically you can create a

scene out of nothing, right?

517

Just using your imagination,

painting a picture of, maybe it's

518

from scripture or maybe it's just

your own scene that you paint.

519

In time of prayer with the Lord.

520

There's really no right

or wrong way again.

521

It's all led by the Holy Spirit.

522

You just ask the Holy Spirit, come

Holy Spirit, enter into this prayer.

523

Help me to see what the Lord

wants me to see right now.

524

And the reason I love this prayer

so much is because in my experience,

525

it has brought the person of

Jesus to life in a whole new way

526

in my life and in my prayer life.

527

Because I can engage my imagination,

along with the truth of what I know of

528

who he is and what he says about me to

imagine what he's speaking to me, what he

529

would say to me in a time in a time of

suffering or a time of need, how he would

530

bring me comfort, , how he would bring me

peace where it allows me to bring a scene

531

of the Bible to life, to be engaged with

it more and learn more about what Jesus

532

was trying to communicate through it.

533

You know, scripture is a really,

really beautiful tool that we can use.

534

And so now I want to get into

Lectio Divina, which is essentially,

535

you know, scripture study.

536

I think a lot of the times we don't know

we're praying Lectio when we're reading

537

scripture, but it's, it's just a fancy

way of saying reflecting on scripture.

538

Lectio Divina essentially is when you

read a piece of scripture multiple times,

539

you allow the Lord to show you what

he wants to speak to you through it.

540

Maybe you have a verse or a word that's

really standing out to you from that

541

passage that you're praying with.

542

You meditate on it.

543

You let it simmer.

544

You ask the Lord, what

does this mean in my life?

545

How can I apply this to my life?

546

, maybe you use a little bit of

Ignatian and you imagine the

547

scene that you're praying with.

548

It's all based off of scripture, but

basically it's just diving into scripture

549

into really a reflective way and applying

it seeing how the Lord is speaking

550

to us and applying it to our lives.

551

And I would say if you have a hard

time with either like mental prayer,

552

contemplative prayer, or imaginative

prayer, , this is a really good place

553

to start because it's a little bit more

structured because you're using a passage

554

from the Bible to really dive into it

and have it be kind of like a platform

555

that kind of kickstarts your prayer.

556

And I think another thing that helps if

you feel a little bit like this is really

557

new to me, I'm kind of uncomfortable,

I don't really know what to do in my

558

prayer, or like I'm trying, but I don't

know what to say, is prayer journaling.

559

Journaling your prayer is something

that we can all do because at

560

one point or another, we all

have journaled before, okay?

561

Whether it was an assignment in school,

we've all like, written accounts

562

of our life and know how to process

or kind of know where to start with

563

writing down like how we're doing

or what's going on in our life.

564

So prayer journaling is a great way, how

I like to say it, , to kind of like loosen

565

your tongue and learn this new language

of prayer and help open the door to the

566

freedom that you can have in prayer.

567

And to show you that,

like, you don't have to.

568

Be a specific person or say

things in a specific way.

569

You can just journal your prayer as

you would journal any journal entry,

570

but just dedicate it to the Lord

and speak to the Lord through it.

571

You know, dear Jesus,

here's how my heart is.

572

Here's where I'm at.

573

This is what happened today.

574

What do you think about this?

575

What are you asking me to

do in this place in my life?

576

You know, things like that.

577

And the more that you do that, the more

you'll be comfortable with With speaking

578

to the Lord and the more casual your words

will be and the more real and more honest

579

your conversations can be with the Lord.

580

Another resource you can use if you are

looking for a more guided prayer guide,

581

would be a Bible study that I wrote.

582

It's called the heart of Christ and

it's basically a short Bible study

583

to help, you know, the compassionate,

merciful, all loving heart of Christ.

584

You can find it at westcoastcatholic.

585

co.

586

, and essentially I created it to help

you come to know the compassionate,

587

merciful, all loving heart of Jesus.

588

And it walks you through accounts of St.

589

Margaret Mary Aliquo as well as

scripture passages and personal

590

reflections that I've written.

591

Um, I hope basically is that you'll come

to see that Jesus's heart yearns for you,

592

loves you and is always reaching for you.

593

Okay.

594

That was a lot.

595

That was a lot of different ways to pray.

596

I hope that that was helpful

and know that you can do this

597

in your home or in a church.

598

I highly, highly recommend that

you go to Eucharistic adoration.

599

This is a gift in our Catholic

church and our Catholic faith.

600

Eucharistic adoration is

basically the exposition of

601

Jesus and the blessed sacrament

602

and the host.

603

So like the communion that we

receive at mass, it is exposed

604

in what's called a monstrance.

605

And you can go and spend

time with him in the chapel.

606

In front of him in prayer, as

Catholics, you believe that the

607

Eucharist is the true body and blood

of Christ, the true presence of Christ.

608

And so to have the true presence of

Christ exposed at your church or in the

609

chapel, and to have the gift to be able

to go and just spend time in front of

610

him and pray with him and be with him and

gaze at him and give him your life and

611

everything is so, so, so transformational.

612

So let's now move into what I think

is one of our biggest obstacles to

613

prayer, something that I hear all the

time that I experience all the time.

614

and it's basically how to make time

for prayer in the midst of a busy life.

615

How do I build a daily routine in

the midst of a crazy, busy life?

616

The reality is we're all busy.

617

You guys, I know that you think

you're the busiest person.

618

I think I'm the busiest

person, but we're not.

619

There is always, always way

to incorporate prayer into our

620

lives and to make time for God.

621

As St.

622

Mother Teresa once said, she said, if you

are too busy to pray, you are too busy.

623

Period.

624

I remember hearing this story about

her and the missionaries of charity

625

and how the missionaries of charity.

626

All with good intention, right?

627

These are really holy, beautiful

sisters would go to mother Teresa

628

and tell her mother, there's

so much need in our community.

629

We need to maybe shorten our prayer

time so that we can go out and help

630

more and to serve the poor more.

631

And mother Teresa said, Oh, Okay.

632

If you feel this way, it seems like we

need to add a second holy hour to our day.

633

And so she added not just one, but now

had two hours dedicated to praying in

634

front of Jesus in the Eucharist to the

missionaries of charities schedule.

635

Because in the end, prayer

is what's most important.

636

Prayers are lifeline to Jesus.

637

And if we like we are too busy to

pray, then we are just too busy period.

638

and there's priorities in our

life that need to be rearranged.

639

Like I said earlier, the priest that

gave the homily at mass this past

640

Sunday was talking about prayer.

641

And one of the things he said

that stuck with me is we have to

642

stop thinking about ourselves as

CEOs of fortune 500 companies.

643

Okay.

644

And even if you are a CEO of a fortune 500

company, it's not like this advice doesn't

645

apply to you because the Lord is still the

Lord and you are still his son or daughter

646

and prayer is still just as powerful

in your life as it is to anybody else.

647

But basically what he was trying to say

is that you think that you don't have

648

time, but you do, and you at least have

the time for the things that you like

649

and the things that you find important.

650

And so the question really is,

What am I dedicating time to?

651

And do I dedicate the

time to prayer or not?

652

Do I make that a priority?

653

And if you just look at your schedule

and just look at your life and you

654

look at what are the things that

I spend the most time on, that'll

655

reveal to you, what do you love?

656

What do you worship?

657

What do you find important?

658

And if God isn't on the top

priority of that list, you guys.

659

Or on that list at all, then like

mother Teresa said, you are too busy

660

and things need to be rearranged.

661

Something needs to change.

662

And I just want to say, I'm

talking to myself here too.

663

I have gone through so many seasons of

life where I have had a humility check,

664

a reality check where I feel like I

need to look at my life and rearrange

665

my priorities and realize that like

I am putting things above the Lord.

666

And.

667

I want to say that I love the Lord above

all things, but if I'm never making time

668

for him, then that statement is empty.

669

And so know that I'm talking

to myself here as well.

670

And this applies really to all of us.

671

So check yourself, but also give yourself

grace to start again, to start small

672

because we all need to start somewhere.

673

And maybe you were in a place

where you had a really good prayer

674

life and you're coming back.

675

Give yourself grace, you know, and,

and start small and build that back up.

676

My most practical.

677

tips that I have for you.

678

The most practical advice that I

have to build a successful daily

679

prayer life is number one to do

it first thing in the morning.

680

Start your day with prayer.

681

I know for myself, I also feel like I'm

super busy and I know that if I don't

682

pray first thing in the morning, then

I'm probably not going to pray at all.

683

Even if I tell myself like, Oh, I'll just

go to the chapel later or, Oh, I'll pray

684

before bed or, you know, I'll take time,

you know, maybe in the middle of the day

685

to, to rest and pray and be with the Lord.

686

It just.

687

It just doesn't happen.

688

The day goes by so quick.

689

And if I don't pray first thing in

the morning, I don't pray at all.

690

And really for my morning prayer

time to be successful, I have had to

691

create kind of like a, like a prayer

corner in my room or kind of like a

692

ritual, kind of like a routine that

kind of tells my body, my mind, my

693

soul, like, okay, we are settling in.

694

We are being with the Lord, you

know, create a environment and a

695

spirit of silence to be able to

allow the into that moment of prayer.

696

So you can do this by, you know, maybe

lighting a prayer candle at home, putting

697

up a crucifix, or, um, I like to do

like a little gallery wall of different,

698

Catholic images or saints, or, you know,

statues of Mary or images of Jesus,

699

um, different prayers, stuff like that,

that will inspire my prayer and guide my

700

prayer and kind of direct my attention

towards the Lord and towards heaven.

701

Now you can pray at home or

you can pray in a church.

702

And if you feel like praying at home is

really hard for you, like it's really

703

distracting or maybe you have roommates

or maybe you don't really have a space

704

that you could create a quiet prayer

corner, then I really, really recommend

705

that you go to the church or a chapel.

706

Most Catholic churches should be open.

707

Almost all day.

708

A lot of them do offer

Eucharistic adoration.

709

Check with your parish and see

what schedule you have and see if,

710

adoration is offered at any time.

711

, and I highly recommend that you go there

712

because church is the house of God.

713

Church is a space of prayer already

in itself . a place of worship.

714

So it allows us to physically

put in ourselves in a space

715

that's going to direct our mind,

our heart and our soul to God.

716

My last piece of advice is to habit stack.

717

This is something that I did

to kind of get into a routine

718

of praying the rosary daily.

719

If that's a prayer that you want

to incorporate into your life.

720

And basically as you pick a habit or

a routine that you already have in

721

your life daily that you do pretty

much every day, or as often as you

722

want to introduce this new habit,

and then you stack this new habit.

723

onto that habit.

724

So you piggyback it on so that

whenever you do the habit that you

725

normally do, you're now adding the

new habit and it becomes a new habit.

726

Essentially.

727

Part of your routine.

728

So an example of this is I wanted

to pray the rosary every day.

729

And so when I was missionary, I would

drive to work and my drive to work

730

would be about 15 to 16 minutes a day.

731

And that was something that

I was doing every single day.

732

And so I got into the habit of getting

in my car and And putting the rosary on,

733

I use the hallow app to pray the rosary.

734

They have different times, like

links that you can pray the rosary.

735

And so I would set like, I think

like the 16 minute one or something,

736

and then I would pray the rosary

while I drove to work every day.

737

And that just became a daily habit.

738

You can do this with other things.

739

You can do this while you're getting

ready in the morning, doing your makeup

740

or while you're making breakfast or,

maybe if you already have a cup of

741

coffee in the morning, you can stack

that with some scripture reading

742

things that you already do in your day.

743

You can just add a new prayer

habit that you want to incorporate

744

into your life on top of that.

745

Woo.

746

Okay.

747

This is so good.

748

You guys, we are really getting into it.

749

I also just feel like

we could go on and on.

750

I know that this is going to be a

little bit of a lengthy podcast,

751

but it's going to be a good one.

752

And at this point I feel like

we need to start splitting

753

it into different sections.

754

I feel like we've covered

a lot of really good stuff,

755

but there's always more that

we could go into, right?

756

So before we close out, I do want

to address some questions that

757

came in on Instagram just a few

days ago when I asked you, what are

758

your biggest struggles in prayer?

759

Or what are your biggest

questions about prayer?

760

So I want to answer these questions right

here, right now on the show, because

761

these are the real questions and struggles

that you feel like you have right now.

762

So I'm going to pull them up.

763

And if you want to put your input

in on future episodes, input future

764

questions, make sure that you're following

along on the Instagrams at ever be

765

podcast or at Mari dot C dot Wagner.

766

This is where I'm going to be asking

for feedback and you are able to input

767

and tell me what you want to hear or

your questions that I'll be addressing

768

on the podcast here and there.

769

Okay.

770

Question one, how to pray

politely as to not offend God,

771

rambling thoughts everywhere.

772

I get distracted easily.

773

This is a good one.

774

I think this is something

that a lot of people fear.

775

And we did touch on it a little bit

earlier in the episode of the way

776

that you word things or what you're

saying, or this fear of like not coming

777

off in a polished way to the Lord is

something that a lot of us struggle with.

778

So pretty much, Don't worry

about not praying politely, or

779

not saying things the right way.

780

Obviously give the Lord the due

respect that he deserves, but

781

don't worry about being perfect.

782

Um, don't worry about not being able to

even be mad at the Lord or be angry or

783

bring him your, your anger and your hurt.

784

You know, there's times when, you

know, I go to the Lord and I, and I

785

bring him all ugly stuff and that's

okay because the Lord isn't just.

786

there for you in good.

787

He's there for you in

the thick of all of it.

788

So you don't have to worry about

being perfect in front of the Lord.

789

rambling thoughts are okay.

790

If you get distracted easily, try and

take those thoughts that are distracting

791

you and write it down on a notebook.

792

You know, maybe while you're praying,

have a notebook next to you, write

793

it down, to get it out of your head.

794

A lot of the times our brain just needs

to get those thoughts out of our head,

795

write it down, set it aside and ask, the

Holy Spirit to come to help you focus.

796

, the evil one is going to try and distract

you in your prayer because His ultimate

797

goal is to pull you away from God.

798

And if prayer is the ultimate way

that we are in union with God, aside

799

from the mass and receiving him in

the Eucharist, he's going to do

800

that and he's going to distract you.

801

So try and beware of that.

802

Next question.

803

I don't have a consistent prayer

life anymore and in battling with

804

habitual sins, where do I start?

805

Thank you for your honesty

and your vulnerability.

806

I know that this is hard.

807

And what I would say to this

is you are always welcome back.

808

You know, welcome back.

809

I'm glad you're here.

810

I'm glad you're starting

over and you want to build

811

your prayer life back up again.

812

My number one recommendation, especially

if you feel like you're battling with

813

habitual sin is to go to confession.

814

The sacrament of reconciliation is truly

Jesus present, through the priest, right?

815

It's called in persona Christi where

he is absolving us of our sins, giving

816

us his mercy, giving us his love

and welcoming us back into his arms.

817

So go to confession and

then just start small.

818

It's okay if you took a break from

your prayer time, if you've been

819

gone from the church, you're always

welcome back and just have grace

820

with yourself and start small.

821

Start with 15 minutes a day in

the morning and maybe build up.

822

Maybe you then.

823

Do 20 minutes the next week and

then 30 minutes the next week.

824

This goes for everyone.

825

I would highly, highly recommend that you

have about 30 minutes of prayer a day.

826

And when you're just starting, start

with a few minutes and build up,

827

but if you can have 30 solid minutes

of prayer a day, That is gold.

828

That is the sweet spot.

829

If you can do one hour, I personally love

to do 30 to 60 minutes because I feel

830

like that's when I'm really, really able

to be in union with the Lord and to get

831

into everything that I want to get into.

832

Sometimes it takes me even like

15, 20 minutes just to focus.

833

so 30 to 60 minutes, but if

you can shoot for 30, do that.

834

Okay.

835

Next question.

836

How do you know what to pray?

837

When do you pray all kinds

of prayer every single day?

838

And then how do you keep a prayer

routine, but still spice up your

839

prayers with different methods?

840

So basically I think this person is

asking, like, how do you know which

841

type of prayer to pray when, and Do

you do things on certain days or how

842

do you make sure that your prayer

life is being, you know, switched up

843

and how do you change up your

different methods of prayer?

844

Um, ultimately it's up to you,

whatever works for you, whatever

845

you feel like is helping you focus

in prayer, connect with the Lord.

846

There is no right or wrong way to do it.

847

And so listen to those

movements of your heart.

848

Listen to where you find peace, to where

you find comfort, to where you feel

849

like you're connecting with the Lord.

850

And maybe in some seasons, prayer

journaling is going to be where it's at.

851

Maybe you just have so much on

your heart and you just have to

852

spill it all out to the Lord.

853

Maybe sometimes you

don't have a lot to say.

854

And so you go to scripture and you

do Lectio Divina because you use.

855

The word of God to guide your prayer.

856

Or maybe you, you bring in like

spiritual reading, a spiritual book,

857

to form your prayer and to learn

from the saints and to, bring their

858

teachings into your life and reflect

on what God is trying to tell you

859

about your life through those readings.

860

So really it's just a day to day

discernment or a season to season

861

discernment of what it is that is

helping you be in union with the Lord.

862

Um, but I wouldn't say that

there's one specific answer or

863

one specific way or day that you

should do a specific type of prayer.

864

If you want a little bit more

of a concrete answer, uh, this

865

is an example of like a prayer

timeline of what you could do.

866

If you were going to pray a holy hour

in Eucharistic adoration, you could do

867

the first 15 minutes of quieting your

heart, opening your hands and inviting

868

the Holy Spirit and just asking the

Lord to, rid your mind of distractions

869

and just use that time to focus on him.

870

And then the next, you know, 20

minutes could maybe be prayer

871

journaling or mental prayer where

you're just conversing with the Lord.

872

Telling him what's on your heart.

873

I'm asking for me, Mary's intercession or

a saint's intercession, and just telling

874

the Lord what's going on in your life.

875

Maybe the next 20 minutes can be a

scripture study or reading a spiritual

876

book to help kind of guide your prayer,

inform your heart and soul a little

877

bit more, and then the last 15 minutes.

878

I hope this is all adding up.

879

Right.

880

Can be prior journaling and you, you

know, recount what happened in your prayer

881

time, offer it all up to the Lord, or

maybe you end with a rosary, or maybe

882

you just end with 15 minutes of silence.

883

And maybe you just want to gaze at the

Lord and just be with him and, just

884

pray in the silence sometimes the

Lord speaks the loudest in the silence.

885

So I hope that helps.

886

Next question.

887

How to work through apathy towards prayer.

888

This is a big one.

889

Like I said at the beginning of the

podcast, you're not always going to feel

890

like you want to pray and that's okay.

891

And I think a lot of people say sometimes

like, well, if I don't feel like praying,

892

then it's not going to be good prayer.

893

So I should probably just pray when I

feel like it because that's a better

894

offering to the Lord than just praying.

895

For the sake of praying or because

I want to stick to a routine, you

896

know, um, and what I would say to

that is that if we only prayed when

897

we felt like praying, we probably

wouldn't be praying very much in those

898

moments when we do feel like praying,

that's actually a grace and a gift.

899

The Lord has given us to desire

him and to draw near to him.

900

So take advantage of those times

when you feel like praying.

901

Yes.

902

And when you don't feel like praying,

lean into it because it is that much more

903

of a gift to the Lord of the time and

effort that you're offering him in those

904

times when you don't really feel like it.

905

And you know what?

906

It's okay to ask the Lord

to give you that desire.

907

If you are working through apathy

towards prayer, it's okay to pray,

908

Lord, I don't really feel like praying.

909

I don't really desire prayer.

910

Help me to desire it.

911

Help me to want to be with you.

912

Help me to want to pray.

913

Pray that every day and I promise you

the Lord will fulfill that prayer.

914

Okay.

915

And the last question I'm going to

answer is does prayer actually work?

916

Oh my gosh.

917

I feel like this could be

a whole episode in itself.

918

Um, yes it does.

919

And I'm just going to cite

one scripture verse here.

920

There are so many verses in

scripture that we can pull

921

that reveals Jesus

teaching us about prayer.

922

And even that reveals Jesus

praying to the father but I just

923

want to go to one right now.

924

It's Luke chapter 11,

verse nine through 10.

925

Let me pull it up on my Bible

because I don't have it memorized.

926

Okay.

927

I am a Catholic, so that

shouldn't come as a surprise.

928

The passage is called

the answer to prayer.

929

And it's Jesus speaking and he says,

and I tell you, ask and you shall

930

receive, seek and you will find,

knock and the door will be open to

931

you for everyone who asks receives and

the one who seeks finds and the one

932

who knocks the door will be opened.

933

What father among you would hand his son

a snake when he asks for a fish or hand

934

him a scorpion when he asks for an egg.

935

If you then, who are wicked, know how

to give good gifts to your children, how

936

much more will the Father in heaven give

the Holy Spirit to those who ask him?

937

Jesus, right here in scripture, says,

Ask the Lord, pray to the Lord, tell

938

him your needs, and you shall receive.

939

So yes, prayer works, expressing

your needs to the Lord.

940

works.

941

He wants to provide for you.

942

He wants to bless you.

943

He wants to answer your prayers.

944

And it just takes you stepping

out in humility and boldness and

945

courage and saying, Lord, I'm here.

946

I love you.

947

I need you.

948

I don't know you.

949

You know, I want to know you,

whatever it is that you're feeling.

950

And the Lord will hear you.

951

All right.

952

So it's time that we wrap up this episode.

953

One thing I want to say before we go is

that my hope for you is that whenever

954

you hear this episode, anything on

the show or encounter any of my faith

955

based content on Instagram, my hope

for you is that you would get off the

956

app, that it would encourage you to go

seek the Lord and spend time with him.

957

like don't just absorb all this advice.

958

Although it's good.

959

I hope it was helpful to you.

960

Don't just absorb it and let it sit

there, but truly let it inspire you.

961

Let it transform you.

962

Let it motivate you to make

a change in your life and

963

actually implement this advice.

964

Start building a daily prayer

life and draw closer to Jesus.

965

When I started building

a daily prayer life.

966

It changed my whole view of God.

967

It changed my whole life.

968

It changed my whole outlook, and it

brought me so much more peace and joy

969

and allowed me to truly surrender my

entire life to God and to know that no

970

matter what happens in my life, it's okay

because the Lord's will will be done.

971

And the only way you can get to that

kind of peace in your life is by

972

giving him time every single day and

coming to know he who is love himself.

973

And if you still after hearing

this whole episode are like I feel

974

like I'm not capable of doing this.

975

I feel so unprepared.

976

So it feels so unnatural.

977

I'll leave you with one last thing.

978

Ask the Holy Spirit to bless

you, ask the Holy Spirit to come

979

and to teach you how to pray.

980

Friends.

981

Thank you for sticking with

me through this long episode.

982

Thank you for asking these questions

and allowing me to speak these

983

beautiful truths into your life.

984

I hope that this blessed you.

985

And if it did, please reach

out to me and let me know.

986

I can't wait to have more of these

conversations with you in my DMS.