Shownotes
There are 2 prohibitions in the Torah that both talk about making changes to the body yet are written differently.
When the Torah prohibits cutting your body in agony over the loss of a relative it says "you shall not make a cut in your "flesh""(Leviticus 19-28)
In the same verse when it prohibits tattooing oneself it says "a tattoo you shall not place on yourselves"" .It does not say on your "flesh"
Why the different wording ?
The Ohr HaChaim explains, the Creator in his great compassion takes into account the mourner's distress and lessens the spiritual damage that this sin causes. The word "flesh" implies the effect of the sin is only external.
Whereas by tattoo a person usually not under distress so the Torah says ,don't cause damage to "yourselves". By doing the sin with full composure one's sin is causing damage to "yourselves" - your inner essence.
2 things that I took out of this Ohr HaChaim:
#1: We see that if the Creator takes into account our pain and distress and lessens the spiritual damage that it causes , then surely if we don't give into the urge and pass the test or we do Mitzvos even when we are in distress than surely we get tremendous reward. As our Sages tell us "depending on the pain/effort that's how much reward". And "One act in pain is better than 100 acts without".
#2: If the Creator takes into consideration our full picture ,then we should do that for our friends. When our friend wrongs us instead of writing him off as an evil, insensitive person, we could look at his full picture and realize he might be going through something difficult right now.