If self-sabotage has ever felt like proof that something is broken in you, this conversation offers a different starting point. Licensed counselor and mindfulness teacher David Fiala joins host Ria to unpack why the real issue isn't weakness, it's believing every thought and image that passes through the mind without question.

With 35 years of clinical practice behind him, David shares simple, repeatable practices for interrupting automatic pilot, replacing harsh self-talk with permission-based affirmations, and using self-forgiveness to recover after a setback instead of spiraling into shame. This episode offers a gentle, practical way to build self-trust one small moment at a time.

About the Guest:

David Fiala, MSSA, LISW-S, is a licensed clinical counselor and mindfulness teacher with over 35 years of experience helping people work with depression, anxiety, stress, and post-traumatic stress. He is the founder of Mind Your Ego and the author of The Courageous Seeker: Release Emotional Pain, Master Your Mind, and Wake Up to Your Inner Warrior.

Key Takeaways:

• The biggest misconception about self-sabotage is believing that every thought and image your mind produces is true. You don't have to believe a thought just because you had it.
• Self-sabotage is often just "being hard on yourself" on autopilot, driven by not paying attention to your own thoughts and chatter.
• A simple practice: bring your focus to your breath, and give yourself permission to let a thought go, rather than forcing yourself to believe something you don't feel yet.
• Traditional affirmations can feel like a forced fit. Reframing them as "I'm giving myself permission to..." makes them more believable and easier to start with.
• Setbacks aren't proof you've failed. Remembering that "every effort I make makes a difference" helps sustain the practice over time.
• Self-forgiveness is a skill you can practice through visualization, even briefly, once a day, to build lasting relief rather than just saying the words.

Connect With the Guest:

• Website: https://www.mindyourego.com/
• Book: The Courageous Seeker: Release Emotional Pain, Master Your Mind, and Wake Up to Your Inner Warrior (available on Amazon and other retailers)

Episode Chapters:

[00:00] The Quiet War Within — the tension between who you've been and who you're becoming

[04:00] (approx.) The Biggest Misconception About Self-Sabotage — why you don't have to believe every thought

[09:15] (approx.) Living on Autopilot — how unattended thoughts and images quietly run your life

[14:30] (approx.) What Self-Sabotage Looks Like Day to Day — people-pleasing, saying yes when you mean no

[19:45] (approx.) Rewriting Affirmations — from "I love myself" to "I give myself permission to love myself"

[25:00] (approx.) Bouncing Back From Setbacks — why every effort counts, even when progress feels lost

[29:30] (approx.) The Practice of Self-Forgiveness — a simple visualization to build lasting relief

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