OUR HOSTS: 

Corinne Foxx - @corinnefoxx

Natalie McMillan - @nataliemcm and @shopnataliemcmillan 

What we're drinking: Au Bon Climat Chardonnay 

TOPIC: 

We’re giving advice on situations that you all wrote in on Instagram or email! As always, we give our two cents and let you know what the experts have to say on the topic. We cover how to break out of toxic relationship cycles and get over a bad ex, what to do when you’re feeling out of alignment with your partner, tips for quitting a job or letting go of a client, and how to ask out a classmate in the virtual learning space. We also discuss how to balance your time between your friends and significant other, and give some examples of how to structure your week when you move in with your partner. 

In this episode, we discuss:

• Consciously changing thought patterns 
• Getting back into the groove with your partner 
• Understanding why someone is apprehensive of therapy 
• How to write a resignation letter 
• Transitioning from Zoom to meeting IRL 
• Maintaining friendships while building your romantic relationship 

END OF THE SHOW: 

Corinne and Natalie introduce Hottie of the Week: Oprah Winfrey

WINE RATING:

Au Bon Climat Chardonnay = 7 / Oprah 

WRAP UP:

To wrap up the episode, we play Would You Rather. Corinne asks Nat if she would rather know the world's secrets, or live ignorantly forever. Nat makes Corinne choose between a long dinner one-on-one with somebody who's trying to convince her that birds are not real, or sit through an equally long talent show of people that are only embarrassing themselves. 

We have a newsletter for our Am I community. You can sign up for the newsletter on our website: amidoingthisrightpod.com

You can email us for episode ideas or Random Advice: amidoingthisrightpod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @amidoingthisrightpod 

Don't forget to rate and review the podcast! It really helps us grow!

[00:00:05] Natalie McMillan: And I'm Natalie McMillan.

[00:00:17] Natalie McMillan: And each week we cover a new topic and we drink a new bottle of wine.

we finally made

[00:00:29] Corinne Foxx: long, we are talking this week, your questions, our advice. This is our first full advice episode. So we are going to be answering questions that you guys wrote in either on Instagram or email. And this is like, this is where we're pumping our chair.

[00:01:05] Corinne Foxx: I put on Instagram, like question on my story about 95% of the responses just say, marry me, will you marry me?

How can I go on a date with you? And sometimes it doesn't even pertain to what we're talking about. Yeah. You know, it's almost never, never does. It never

[00:01:28] Corinne Foxx: But yeah, you guys have been engaged. So much more. We love connecting with you guys.

Hello? To all the new listeners. We're so happy to have you here.

[00:01:48] Corinne Foxx: asking. Yeah. Yeah. Please, please. Okay. Now, so what are we drinking for our, as you would say, Kiki.

I'm very excited and I need

[00:02:25] Natalie McMillan: I need to rest, I mean, I know we're not citizens arresting today, but citizens arrest on this one. It's insanity. Yeah, we are schvitzing saying, cheers.

[00:02:39] Natalie McMillan: We don't do that often, usually. Okay.

Well, before we used to be way across the table, so we couldn't physically reach interesting. God

[00:02:54] Natalie McMillan: I don't think so. Why can't interesting be your catch phrase. Interesting. So the other day I saw what was the movie velocity?

Oh God, I want

[00:03:06] Natalie McMillan: so funny. Like genuinely so funny and I'm begging everybody to go see it. Cause I'm like, can the box office numbers show that we want original movies again, please, please. But I don't know if this is an LA specific thing or if this is nationwide and this is why I'm bringing this up because I would like the Amies to chime in.

If you see movies at the AMC theater in here in LA, when Nicole Kidman comes on the screen. Cause she does this little. Review. Thank God. It's so creepy. It. People now start cheering and clapping and screaming when she comes out. Well, I was, we're all so stoked on the ridiculousness of

Because I was went to the movies with Joe. I don't know what we were saying. Oh, Batman. And we're sitting there. When is Nicole Kidman going to come out before the movie? Isn't she going to plan to come out? And then like, as I say that, then you just see your footsteps walking in. But yes.

So like, you know, her little steps on the, in the puddle. Right. And everybody's like cheer it on everybody. Yeah. So it's a thing now. Oh,

[00:04:30] Natalie McMillan: Nicole's. What we're talking about. Do they have it everywhere

[00:04:40] Natalie McMillan: can watch it.

I just want to know too. I'm going to feel very sad the day. But I get rid of that. It's gone. It's iconic. It's actually iconic at this point. I'm like, she's going to have to keep D I I'm afraid that her claim to fame from now on might be the AMC woman. Yeah. She's going to be the AAMC. My little sisters have never

[00:05:00] Natalie McMillan: lady, lady.

Yeah.

[00:05:13] Natalie McMillan: about. Oh, well, you know, we have to call ourselves out because we always are asking like, send us your advice and as you revise, and then we. Busy we chew. We have all these things or we have a guest on and we can't give enough time.

So now we're finally here and made it, you all, we've made it. And we put a poll on Instagram asking if hearing other people's advice helped you and everybody, but one person said it. So if you're that one person you can, uh, you can tune it out, go ahead and tune out. But everybody else, I think you might find some, some help in here somewhere.

Yeah. And these are your fellow Amies is your fellow, am I, so we're all the

I'm a woman. He had a very bad temper and the relationship was full of intense emotions. For this reason I tried throughout the duration of the relationship. Of that year and a half to end it but failed. And it was just full of breaking up and getting back. We've all been there and like you just go back and forth.

Yeah. It turned into a habit. He wouldn't let go. And I eventually got caught in that habit. In the end, he found someone and I became desperate trying to win him back and tables had turned, oh, no girl.

[00:06:51] Corinne Foxx: he blocked me from all places and gave me a huge piece of his bad temper said awful things.

Oh my God. And made me in a position full of regrets while I know it. Wasn't all my fault. I keep thinking about how I should have done things differently. There was a mention in your podcast about how to talk to your subconscious. Oh yeah. Not. You took that. You took that course. If you think that might help, could you give me the reference memories and regrets are disrupting my day to day.

And although I have put a lot of self-help work into me and instill am like journaling, working out and meditating and all those basics, I'm having a very hard time giving another person a chance or living at my best on a day to day, I feel lazy and sluggish and very sensitive and emotional I've talked through about him too.

I have talked through about him to confidence. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like I can't get him out of my subconscious and mostly I've built a habit to think about him constantly. Do you have actionable ways? I might be able to break this habit of thinking about him and getting him out of my subconscious.

Another piece of disclosure is that I have realized this to be a pattern. The re relationships. I have felt addicted to my partner and have taken a year, if not, years, to get over them. I know you have already said, but I'd love for this to be anonymous. Of course, miss feel like I can trust you already.

Thanks for your awesome or whatnot, hummus. And am I

[00:08:34] Corinne Foxx: expert advice on our podcasts and that's what makes us unique. So what is your initial gut in this? I mean, you took the subconscious class, so maybe you should, yes.

Yeah. So

[00:09:04] Corinne Foxx: No, no, no, you shouldn't. You never deserve to be treated poorly, but it's also good to be able to reflect and be like, there's things I could've done better.

[00:09:22] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. I mean, she says, she, she says she don't

[00:09:48] Corinne Foxx: which more it's more of like an automatic habit.

Yes. Yes. Well, what I have to say about that is that sometimes when you have obsessive thoughts, it's because there's like a neural pathway. That's been like establishing your brains. You automatically go there. So what you have to do is disrupt that neural pathway, so that it's think of it like a, like a road in the woods, right?

If you keep going down, it keeps getting more and more clear and easier to go down. And the less you traveled down it, the more it kind of closes up and becomes, you know, overgrown and then you can't go down at anymore. So I think that when you notice yourself thinking about him, get up, switch to something else.

Also, what you could do is have a little rubber band on your wrist, snap it, when you think of him, because then your brain starts associating thinking of him with physical pain and naturally your body does not want to be harmed. So it will guide you in a different direction. So if you have to snap yourself, you know, don't hurt your.

But if you need a little pop just to like wake you up, get out a little shock. Yeah. But you have to just, if you're conscious of these thoughts, you have to just find something else to do. Whether it's get up. Sometimes you can do like pushups just to like.

Yeah. And like we said, so if it's, this is a conscious thought as opposed to the subconscious, so you have to consciously change it, which is hard.

Cause there's a lot of tips on like how to get over people and how to move forward with your life, et cetera, et cetera.

That's like the first kind of step here. So according to Sherry steins, who's a psycho, she's a. Side D oh wow. Such as a doctor of psychology, she says the first step in recovery is to face the truth. Identify your toxic person as the drug quote, unquote drug of sorts you are addicted to before you can break any addiction, you need to own the reality that you.

I have one acknowledgement is the beginning of your journey towards recovery. She also suggests getting a journal and getting really clear on how this cycle is impacting you and what you are gaining from it. So for example, staying in this cycle might provide things for you, like a sense of belonging, feeling wanted, et cetera.

So once you know what that toxic relationship pattern provides for you, you can begin to seek it out in other healthy. She also recommends that you have zero contact with the person that you're having a hard time pulling yourself away from. And she also wants to acknowledge that it will be very hard, but the only way to truly get over quote unquote, someone is by breaking this toxic cycle.

And so you have to really commit to like, if you want this for yourself, we got to cut this guy off. And I think it's really interesting to, like, let's say. This pattern gives you a feeling of belonging, right. And then finding a healthier way to do it. It's like maybe if you like joined a class, like a class or something, you know, something you liked, then it might replace that feeling that you feel like you're

Yeah. And I really liked that. She also mentioned that this is. And addiction, like I do believe you can be addicted to things that aren't alcohol and drugs love addictions or actual thing. Yes. And so I think treating it that way and taking it that seriously and committing to your recovery, you know, that intensely is going to be really helpful for you.

So we, we hope that you you're feeling better. Listen to our previous episode, let us know what happened, but hopefully you find somebody and actually I believe. This to be true, that you will find somebody that treats you well. Yeah. Don't ever deserve to be treated. No, no, no, no. I don't love that for our RMS.

No,

Nameless am I? I could use some brutal, honest advice from people outside, my best friends and family on this one. Okay. She says my boyfriend of 12 years. I shouldn't say that this is a woman. I don't know. Yeah, they are boyfriend of 12 years. We broke up twice for short periods of time are having some detrimental relationship issues, communication, growth, and even a sex dry spell.

We try to talk things out, but we have very different communication styles and also have some individual growth to do along with the relationship growth. He's refusing to go to couples therapy, to learn tools on how we can work on. Together. I could use advice on what either of you would do at this point to help and encourage going or suggesting.

Oh, to encourage going, I get it going to couples therapy or suggesting other tools or other things to try. Part of me thinks this is it. If we can't do better together, then it may be time to move on. After all this time, but I do truly, still love him and want it to work. The barriers are just becoming a lot and I feel sad and overwhelmed.

Thank you for anything you can suggest. I really appreciate it.

And sometimes it is very hard to face the inevitable. I love that. You've been suggesting couples therapy. Don't love that. He's not open to it. And

[00:16:20] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. It also just seems like even outside of couples therapy, like you're putting in the time to fix things. I don't, it does not seem like from your email, he's putting that same effort. And even if it's like, I can't go to couples therapy, but I still want to do this with you. And I still want to do this with you, even if he feels uncomfortable there.

So, I mean, yes, you feel sad and overwhelmed as you should. I mean, it's really heartbreaking when somebody, you love. Is going to maybe like head out of your life.

[00:16:57] Corinne Foxx: when she said brutally honest. I like, oh, we massage in the room.

That is incredible. You know, you guys, you know, each other very well. You've had a very good run, but I do think that. If you're at this point where you're already questioning, if this is over and he's not willing to. To work on it with you? I would say it might be, it might be your time to, it

Yeah. That's brutally honest. I know.

[00:17:40] Corinne Foxx: serving her and sometimes it's like, you don't want to wait for it to. Horse and, and who knows, you might take a break from each other and you might be like, you know, you said you've broken up twice before.

Like maybe it is like, it just needs some space and that'll be kind of what fixes things. But it does sound like it might be time for some time apart. Yeah. Yes.

Because I do think space having each, having each other. We'll give you perspective and you know, the distance makes the heart grow fonder thing. Exactly. And you can kind of realize like how it's affecting you and just kind of your own. Go through your own feelings and

Let's turn to the experts. So we're gonna start with the first part, which was the benefits of couples therapy. So a study mentioned by the American association of marriage and family therapy found that 90% of clients reported an improvement in their emotional health and over 75% reported a improvement in their relationship.

You are on it, girl. Yeah. You know, if we're going to save this relationship, we got to go to couples therapy. We do. We also found information from an article on health line, titled what to do. If your partner won't go to therapy. So number one says, start by understanding why your partner won't go to therapy.

Research has shown. Over and over again, that couples in low income households are at increased risk of relationship distress while also being less likely to participate in couples counseling because of costs. So maybe it could just be, yeah. Which is terrible, but it is a fair reason maybe. To go because you just can't afford it.

Another reason could be that your partner sees therapy as punishment therapy should never be something you threaten your partner with, or force them to go through. Um, as like an ultimatum, that's a sure way to make it something your partner resents. Really proved useless. So really making it, you know, showing them the facts that, yeah, like 75% reported an improvement in their relationship.

This isn't a punish you, the assistant benefit us and we're going together. Cause like, I want to learn like what I'm doing wrong. I'm

[00:20:07] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. Another reason that your partner might not want to go to therapy is your partner's uncomfortable, disgusting relationship issues.

All this tends to be an issue. If a partner has a hard time expressing their feelings or doesn't feel safe, opening up, and there's really no quick fix here, but if you think your partner is struggling with being vulnerable, the best thing you can do is to be there for them and give them the space to feel comfortable expressing how they feel.

So maybe you got to get in a better communication style at home to be able to tell. Bring it to a therapist, make it a very

[00:20:41] Corinne Foxx: Yeah. And I think really framing it as like, this is for me. Yeah. You know, and even if you kind of have to like lie a little bit, like, oh, I just feel like I'm not showing up for you in the way that you need.

So like, would you like to go so I can learn? Yes.

Expert advice on when do we know a relationship is over. Yeah.

[00:21:22] Natalie McMillan: question. Yeah. Yes. So one is, there's no emotional connection. So one of the key signs your relationship is ending is that you are no longer vulnerable and open with your partner. A cornerstone of happy, healthy relations.

Is that both partners feel comfortable being truly open to sharing thoughts and opinions with one another. If you're not sharing, what's really on your mind, it might be a sign that you no longer want a deep connection. Similarly, if you found that the usual fun banter between you is gone, or it's difficult to have engaging conversations, your bond could be.

Progressively weak. Yeah. Yeah. Another thing, physical intimacy doesn't appeal to you anymore. A lack of sexual interest is often a reflection of the health and potential longevity of relational,

[00:22:12] Natalie McMillan: pop girly co-op. The third one is someone else seems more appealing.

So while it's normal to fantasize about other people, desires can be harmful when they minimize the importance of sex with your partner, whether you're fixated on your ex crushing on someone from work or longing for strangers, it's time to, we consider your feeling. Next is your goals don't align. So one of the hardest disconnects to accept in a relationship is when partners want different things, no matter how deeply you care for each other, if you're not planning for the same goals in life, it's difficult to realign your hope.

Yeah. I think about that with like kids, how hard it would be if you met somebody you loved so much. And they were like, I don't want. Yeah.

[00:23:04] Natalie McMillan: I think that unfortunately too right now, politics.

[00:23:18] Natalie McMillan: It's probably a bigger thing. And lastly, is that it's hard to agree on anything. So another telltale sign you're headed towards a breakup is that you don't see eye to eye anymore.

When you're dealing with constant disagreements, it can lead to anger on both sides. Yeah. So just go through top list CC.

It's definitely an SOS situation. Oh my God. SOS. We are here. I would really love your advice on how to let go of client. Or leave a job gracefully. I've never sent in a letter of resignation from my previous jobs, and I've never broken up with a client first. So am I doing this right?

I don't want to burn any bridges, but I know these types of conversations. Easy. And I'd love your help on how to handle these situations like a boss. Thank you. Hope to hear from you soon. Uh, um, well, first of all, what I'm seeing here is that you value yourself. Yes, she does yourself. Can you value how you treat others?

You're saying, Hey, this isn't working for me either. You know, this client you have, or this job you have. But I would like to move on, but I would like to be graceful. I don't want to hurt any feelings. I don't want to burn any bridges doing greater, so are doing it right? You are doing this right? Yes.

I think it's so hard also. I don't know if this is a man or a woman, but I'm gonna just assume it's I probably shouldn't do that, but a lot of our listeners are women. And I think as women, a lot of the time, we really want. People

[00:25:16] Natalie McMillan: be like, I don't want them to see me as this or that. You know, it's hard to have confrontation with people, you know?

Cause you don't want them to say like, oh, well she was up

It's going to be the best situation for your job, because if you're not happy there or not feeling good there, you're not going to do a great job. I would say, in terms of advice on how to go about this, I would really come from the place you're coming from in this email, when you're writing. You know, letter of resignation, you can thank them for the opportunity.

You could say how much you've learned and grow. Yes. But you can also say, and I would love to not burn any bridges, but I would like to, you know, move on and, you know, I don't think you need to. I mean, unless they've treated you terribly, I don't think you need to berate them or criticize them, but you can thank them.

Say like I've loved

[00:26:20] Corinne Foxx: me to move on. And then in terms of a client, I think one thing you can do as well, Give them some other options of somebody. I don't know what profession you're in, but like saying, Hey, you know, I can't work with you anymore, but here's some people that I really love, I really recommend.

Um, or, or even like put them on an email chain with like, Hey, I'd love to introduce you to this person so that you don't feel like you're leaving them hanging. Right.

Cause we, we saw that you've never written one. So for anybody writing one, it is the great resignation right now. Isn't that what it's called? It was out. It is everyone's everybody's quitting our jobs. Okay. So number one is give adequate notice to your employer, write a formal resignation letter and be prepared to move on prior to submitting it.

Your letter should start with the fact that you're resigning. Just

[00:27:22] Natalie McMillan: clear cut. I am resigning here. The second thing is state your last day of employing. Okay. I have that in there. Third is an offer to assist with the transition. So often resignation letters will also offer help in the transition, whether it be by recruiting or training or replacement, something like that in this way, both the employee and the employer can leave the situation with closure and a sense of respect and amicable.

That was similar to what you're saying.

[00:27:54] Natalie McMillan: client. Number four is questions you may have. So if you have any questions about your final pay or benefits, you can inquire in that letter or the email. And then fifth is your contact information.

I guess a lot of people don't put the contact information down. So put like your email, your cell phone, you signature the whole nine. So that's how you do

[00:28:27] Natalie McMillan: of others.

Yeah. I kind of feel like she's a therapist. She might, she might be, you know, that's my vibe. All right. We're going to get into. Email number four, but actually this is a DM. Ooh, we love it. We love to be slid into the DMS. This says, hi. I hope you're both doing well. And I really appreciated the advice you gave me last time.

Oh, we gave her advice last

[00:28:55] Natalie McMillan: before I remember this. Okay. I'm currently in a girl situation where I would love some advice I'm in college and I still have online classes in my art class, which is on zoom. There's a girl who I like, but I don't know how to approach her.

I love the podcast and it definitely helps a young man like myself. See the world from a woman's perspective. Thank you so much for all that.

I want to make sure she feels like you're just doing everything right. Thank God. He wrote it in before about like how to. How to support women member. Yeah. Or something like that.

[00:30:08] Corinne Foxx: life more than first of all, your, every girl's dream. Okay. And this girl would be lucky to go on a date with you and you see making gentlemen, you see self-aware, you're listening to our podcast.

It is working for you, God. Okay. So if I liked somebody on a zoom, well, what I did, no.

[00:30:33] Corinne Foxx: texting in the Jew? In the zoom chat? You know, like he, I think he's there in class.

There's like, you know, you can try. So I think he doesn't want to be like, Hey, like can I go out with, and then be like, oh, like, it's weird. He's making me feel weird. So.

Yeah. Maybe add her and, you know, she might add you right back, and then you could just, you could do a DM side and be like, oh, Hey, like your

Like, I've really loved, like talking to you, like. Would you, I don't know. Maybe you could kind of use that, like ending that you want to like get her number or like you'd love to stay in contact and like, and like, I don't know. Okay. I'm trying to think. I kind of love the way you wrote this. Like, you know, you could just, you could write, like, I don't want to come across the wrong way.

I really like you I'd love to get to know you more. Like it's totally cool if you, if you're not feeling the same way, but like I thought I'd shoot my shot. You give her your number and be like, here's my number. Oh, so it did her hands. Yes. Give me yours, be like, here's my number? Like if you ever want to like go out.

Yeah. DM.

[00:32:12] Corinne Foxx: bother you. I'm not going to cause a lot of the times I've had acting classes where guys have liked me. And when I tell you, these guys are so fucking weird and they hit me up in the him, and I don't want to give him my number.

Cause they won't stop hitting me up. Remember the guy who sent me the happy birthday singing video. Yeah.

and I go, I feel really uncomfortable with you calling me beautiful. And he goes, why I call my niece beautiful. You shouldn't feel. And I was like, oh, so I had to block him on everything. That's why I feel like you giving her your number and then being like, Hey, it's in your hands. I'm not going to like, because

So my place is not an acting class or. For some reason, the grocery store parking lot is where all the men want to ask me for my number. And I don't want to give them my number, but I say, I don't give my number out, but I will give you my Instagram. I do that too. So I think it would be best to kind of go

You can do it. Yeah. All right. Let's move into the expert advice that we found though. So this is from Bonnie side, she's the founder and director of beyond etiquette. So she says before, moving straight from zoom to in-person Hangouts. See what mode of communication like text, email, Snapchat. That's a big Snapchat, Snapchat, you both the most comfortable.

And then from there, you can start to see if they are engaging and want to start talking, and then you can get to know them better outside of. Setting, you know, like start talking about things that like you, like, that's not whatever this class is. Yeah. Also Sylvia. Oh gosh. McKee, N N R N yard McKee and year and year.

That's what I'm just so she is a relationship researcher and assistant professor at the university of Iowa. She said that social media. Sliding quote-unquote sliding into someone's. DMS can be a great tool to connect Uber expert, Natalie, whether that just being saying like hello, or maybe even like sharing a meme or commenting on something they've posted, you are creating new shared experiences and you can now talk about those shared experiences that you've also like had in class.

Yes. We have a meme that their show friendly. Like really, I will say that girls are immediately on guard when anyone's like really reaching, like hitting them up. So I think like making it as fun and normal as possible and not like hitting her up ad nauseum, like get, get the hint. If she's not into it, she's not, she's not into it.

Yeah. But, um, you sound like a catch. So I feel like she will be. Yeah. I love that.

[00:34:52] Corinne Foxx: like, you know, he's got it. Let us know what happened. I'm very excited. Okay. So let's move into our last DM that we got on Instagram. It is quick and simple. It's a one-liner it says need advice.

How to handle being the first friend to move in with a boyfriend when all your friends are single.

[00:35:21] Corinne Foxx: in this phase out to live with Joe, he's moving in, in like a month. But, well, what I will say about at least just being in a relationship in general is that you always have to be aware of balancing time with your friends and time with your significant other.

And I think that's just going to be more important as you move in with your boyfriend. And so I feel. Making sure that you're having the same shared quality time with your girlfriends. So being like, Hey, like being, you know, being like, Hey, let's why don't you come over for a movie night and then telling your boyfriend, like, you're going to have to, uh, go on the go or just go in the bedroom and shut the door and pretend you're not here telling you don't exist.

Um, you know, when your girlfriends are single, they're probably also going out a lot. So, you know, you might have to just balance if you want to go out, you know, go out sometimes and then. Stay in sometimes, you know, and I think just being also honest with them about like, I'm a little worried that like, I'm not going to see you as much.

Can we still make time to hang

Even if it's a good thing. So you might be like, oh my God, like I'm missing out on everything. And I've made a huge mistake. You know what I mean? But in reality, you haven't, it's just a big change. Yeah. So it's just kind of slide into that uncomfortability for a bit

[00:36:52] Natalie McMillan: expert tips for maintaining friendships while interrelationship?

So we found this information from an article on apartment therapy by a lady named Brittany Morgan. She says, reach out. If your friends are constantly reaching out to you first calling, texting, asking to make plans and you never do. They'll start to feel frustrated. So make a conscious effort to start conversations and invite them to things without being prompted so that your friends don't feel left behind.

Yeah. I feel

[00:37:28] Natalie McMillan: She's just blown off the face of the earth. She also says keep communication open.

So this goes for both. And your partner, you need to be able to openly honestly, talk with them in general as a part of a healthy relationship, but it's especially important not to forget this when circumstances in your life change. So talk to your partner about how important your friends are to you and let them know.

You want to make sure you always have time for them. That way your partner understands that your friends are a part of your life and your schedule. And while you're at it, let your friends know the same things. So they know that you value them and want to make time for them. It may be something you feel can go without saying, but saying how you feel and how much you value your loved ones can make a world of difference.

Yeah.

[00:38:26] Natalie McMillan: with. I know.

And I just thought of another thing that would be like, I don't know if I was in your position. I think this will be kind of fun. Is that. Once a month, you and your boy, your boy toy. And your man's you both, you have date night, but with your friends, oh, you have a date out on the same night, but it's with your friends.

Your friend group. So not together, but like, you know, oh my God, you could have the girls over. And Joe could like go watch a fucking football game or whatever is in season right now. I don't

When you're living with your partner, it was like, there are seven nights in a week. Two of the nights use. On your own, like at home. So like, you know, I either like do like my self care and like Joe does whoever the fuck, whatever the fuck, you know, like two of those nights are like really, for us two nights we spend together and we like watch a movie or we do this.

And then one of the nights we do the separate date nights with our friends. So like he goes out with his friends or family. I go out with my friends or family and then we have another day where we do it collectively. We co-mingle with each other as family. And I was like, oh my God, that's such a great way to think about it.

That is a really great way. I do think even though Joe and I don't live together, we, we were pretty good about that's how we

[00:39:47] Corinne Foxx: we balance like doing our own date nights. And then like, I, we, I go to a lot of his friends, things, he comes to one of my friend's things and like, he comes a lot of my family thing.

Sorry, Joe. Um, you know what I mean? So like, we kind of balance it like that, but we both introverted. We're going to need time apart.

[00:40:06] Corinne Foxx: all right, well that was our first ed bite. So you guys thank you so much for writing and this was so fun. We hope you got some good advice. We hope you feel inspired to write in if you want our advice and I hope you feel more connected to the AMI community.

Yes. And we start there just like us.

[00:40:31] Corinne Foxx: I love to know what's going on in your life. Okay. Now, should we circle back on this spine? I'm so hot, Natalie. I'm actually, I'm going to pass out on my, oh my God.

I'm I'm attached. I'm chipping

[00:40:44] Corinne Foxx: sweating. So do you see me? I'm like studying, like with my hair and my neck. I'm like, Ooh. I was like beading,

[00:41:01] Corinne Foxx: still very hot.

Okay. So back to the Chardonnay. Yes you are. How do you have the week whom we thought we've had on the potty potty, miss

[00:41:16] Corinne Foxx: better to give you advice?

[00:41:21] Corinne Foxx: else. Oh my God. We wish you guys could write into her, but you can't. So you have us, but you

[00:41:28] Corinne Foxx: We have met let's post that we'll post that on

I'll never forget it. I'm like, holy shit. Oh bro. Anyway.

[00:42:03] Natalie McMillan: I also just remember just that one time we were in Atlanta. And then you said it's a hole that that'll be a whole rabbit hole. Anyways, Chris really casually was like, well, this one time when I was in South Africa with Oprah, well, what was the

Like we're not really strangers or something. And you were like, it was like,

[00:42:28] Corinne Foxx: he asked me a very casual question and then I answered. Well, I can't really think of anything, except for that one time I went to South Africa with Oprah and she just like, literally fell out of her seat.

She's like, what the fuck are you

because she hadn't told me. So I was Hispanic. I was crying.

[00:43:07] Natalie McMillan: Africa with her.

So funny. I get that. That's like, I don't know. I just like, yeah, of course. I forget things. And then she'll tell me like last, the last thing that I remember that was so funny is when you went to rough riders or you went

Yeah. I was like 11 years old. That was a really traumatic experience for me,

[00:43:48] Corinne Foxx: I give it a seven. I'll give it a seven. We'll meet at a seven out of seven Adam Harpo for this

A

[00:44:16] Natalie McMillan: You want me to ask you first? Oh, oh no. Yeah. You asked me first because I feel like you've

got

Would you rather know the world's secrets or live ignorantly forever? Oh fuck. I know that's a hard one. I was actually really curious, but you choose.

[00:44:48] Corinne Foxx: no, I do think it's it's society secrets.

It's like, but you, you would know for sure. If

all

[00:44:59] Natalie McMillan: I think I would probably want to remain ignorant. Because the, the realities of the world are probably so horrific that I would no longer, I would just be like, this is the worst knowing what's really happening.

You know? So I, I don't really believe in the whole ignorance is bliss. I think we all should be informed and open-minded and everything, but I don't need to know all of the secret.

[00:45:36] Natalie McMillan: would you, I am loving.

Would you

[00:45:52] Natalie McMillan: Specific to

smacked in the face thing is very topical for reasons that don't need to be mentioned.

[00:46:06] Corinne Foxx: is really based. Smacking is a topical thing

[00:46:11] Corinne Foxx: decided I better not ask her though, but it was really,

One-on-one with somebody who's convincing you or trying to convince you that birds are not real. Okay. Or sit through an equally, as long talent show of people that are only embarrassing them. Oh no, no, no, no, no,

Aren't real thing. So I would love to sit there and listen to that. I hate you guys. It's her biggest date, watching people embarrass themselves. I would rather jump off a cliff. I'd rather be dead. I hate, I hate even like it's I can't even watch. America's got talent when they've been vetted. So I'm like, God, God forbid, they fall.

God. Trip. Oh God, I just can't. I can't, I have too much secondhand embarrassment for people. It's very hard for me to do live comedy. And I have, whenever I go to live comedy shows, even if I don't think it's funny,

because I'm just like someone has to laugh. I can't

[00:47:34] Corinne Foxx: It's too. It's too much. It's simply too much for me. That was a great one.

Not hurry you guys. Well, if you want us to do more of these episodes, you guys can write in. We just need the context, give us the content, give us what's going on in your life. You can write it at, am I doing this right pot@gmail.com or DMS at am I doing. Pod on Instagram. We also have a newsletter that you can sign up for it.

Am I doing this right? pod.com and rate and review the episode if you love it. And we love you and we love you. We'll be back next week with another episode. Love you guys. Bye.