Shownotes
The Sovereign Eight Invitational heralds an exhilarating clash of creativity and competition, as we witness our esteemed collaborators engage in a tournament reminiscent of a death match. This episode revolves around the fierce yet jovial rivalry between our players, culminating in a series of games designed to test their wits and skills. Amidst the tavern banter, participants navigate challenges that blend humor with strategy, showcasing their prowess in a setting that balances camaraderie with competition. The stakes are high, yet the atmosphere remains lighthearted, ensuring that every roll of the dice and impromptu decision contributes to the unfolding narrative. Join us as we delve into this unique blend of gaming and storytelling, where legends are forged and friendships are both tested and celebrated.
Transcripts
Roll the dice, raise the ale Heroes gather, tell the tale.
Speaker A:Chat Monday, the quest's begun.
Speaker A:Not ones fly, but we still run.
Speaker A:Mud's up high.
Speaker A:Let legends come welcome into Chats One and done.
Speaker B:What's up, everybody?
Speaker B:Welcome to Chat one and done.
Speaker B:Sort of.
Speaker B:Welcome to season four, guys.
Speaker B:This is basically a little different than what we do with season three.
Speaker B:Season three is mainly interviews.
Speaker B:Season four, I always told C, I always told C.J.
Speaker B:And Dante, wouldn't it be great if we just got all of our closest friends and we made them fight in a Mortal Kombat style kumite?
Speaker B:But apparently they said legal issues.
Speaker B:We can't make them fight to the death.
Speaker B:So I guess we're doing eliminations.
Speaker C:We did try for it, but we just kept getting pushed.
Speaker B:Legal would not okay us for it.
Speaker C:Yeah, we thought it was a lost cause.
Speaker D:I said do it anyway, but HR still breathing down my back.
Speaker B:So, you know, here we are.
Speaker B:The insurance cost was astronomical.
Speaker A:Oh, no.
Speaker C:Sorry, guys.
Speaker C:We just got an Amber Alert for an abducted five year old.
Speaker B:Yeah, let me.
Speaker B:Sorry, guys, we're gonna have to cut that out.
Speaker B:Oh, that was real.
Speaker E:I thought that was a bit.
Speaker B:No, no, no.
Speaker A:Our producer is calling,.
Speaker C:So we're gonna leave it in and explain there just as this is gonna be releasing this week, just in case.
Speaker C:Amber Alert in Phoenix.
Speaker C:Newborn abduction, five day.
Speaker C:Oh.
Speaker C:Five day old.
Speaker C:Holy shit.
Speaker C:Five day old white male.
Speaker C:Ollie Olson, five pound 18 inches.
Speaker C:Last seen in blue swaddle blanket.
Speaker C:Suspect is Tyler Olson, white male.
Speaker C: lson, white female, driving a: Speaker C:Keep an eye out and if you see those fuckers, you know what to do.
Speaker B:Report them.
Speaker C:Mm, yep.
Speaker B:All right, so back to this.
Speaker B:So basically what this is is Unhinged tournament style.
Speaker B:We got different collaborators.
Speaker B:We got DMS going head to head in competition in the first ever Sovereign 8 Invitational to see who comes out as Sovereign.
Speaker B:So we had a very special case here where one of the players that we had originally on the bracket was Coffee Horse.
Speaker B:He was originally in.
Speaker B:And we lost the opponent he was supposed to play against.
Speaker D:So they ran in fear of his aura.
Speaker B:Yeah, he was aura farming too hard.
Speaker A:I'm not farming it.
Speaker B:So we actually lost two people in the tournament.
Speaker B:So we had a rush to get some replacements and we're like, you know what?
Speaker B:I think Max does pretty good in these games.
Speaker B:Yeah, I'll do.
Speaker E:I'll do anything for five bucks.
Speaker E:So I'm here.
Speaker B:We gave him five bucks.
Speaker D:I'll keep that in Mind.
Speaker B:Hey, man, five bucks is five bucks.
Speaker E:I took it out of your wallet, Rudy, you're good.
Speaker C:Oh, fair enough.
Speaker B:Joke's on you.
Speaker B:I had CJ's wallet.
Speaker C:Jokes on you.
Speaker C:I had Dante's jokes on you.
Speaker D:Mine's filled with crayon drawings.
Speaker E:What the is this Monopoly money jokes on me.
Speaker A:I paid everyone.
Speaker A:That.
Speaker C:That link that said about, you know, paying $0.01 for Bitcoin and being able to flip it for 100k, but you had to give me 10k.
Speaker C:Yeah, that.
Speaker C:My bad.
Speaker C:That was me.
Speaker B:I know.
Speaker A:I knew it was you the whole time.
Speaker D:That's why I was actually the Nigerian prince.
Speaker A:Oh, that's why it didn't.
Speaker C:I remember those.
Speaker A:You, you, you.
Speaker A:You flirted horribly to Dante.
Speaker A:You can do way better than that.
Speaker B:Type in winky face.
Speaker A:Yeah, he asked me what length my socks were and then I knew he was trying to take my money.
Speaker B:Yeah, man, that's how down.
Speaker B:S4 or not.
Speaker A:Yeah, he was the one that was like, what lengths are.
Speaker A:What length is your socks?
Speaker B:He gave you a sock check.
Speaker B:Because if you're wearing cut off ankle socks, he knows you ain't got a weapon to defend yourself.
Speaker E:The second he sent me that, I sent him my entire savings.
Speaker A:Hold on a minute.
Speaker A:How does that correlate?
Speaker B:Because you're not a down ass fool.
Speaker B:Clearly, I must be wearing this.
Speaker A:So I have to be wearing thigh high socks all the time because then I'm.
Speaker B:Okay, we've had this conversation.
Speaker B:We've had this conversation before.
Speaker B:I think to the knee.
Speaker B:Under the knee, you're down ass fool.
Speaker B:Above the knee, you like kinky shit.
Speaker B:That's where we draw the line.
Speaker C:Above the knee.
Speaker C:It seems like you could kind of risk going into like skirt territory.
Speaker D:But what if it's like fishnets under there?
Speaker A:But what if it's.
Speaker A:If you're wearing a kiln,.
Speaker B:You're a kid.
Speaker B:No, no.
Speaker C:Did you know that?
Speaker C:So fishnets have actually been worn under clothes, like a full fishnet bodysuit under clothes for years in, like on boats and because it would actually provide a protective layer against your skin and getting cold and like.
Speaker C:No, no, no,.
Speaker A:No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker C:Serious.
Speaker C:Because it creates air pockets in each little mesh hole that causes resistance against the water.
Speaker B:I think we're thinking about the same thing.
Speaker B:Because it's legitimate.
Speaker B:No fishnet.
Speaker B:The.
Speaker B:Yeah, the fishnets of the holes are like that big.
Speaker C:Well, okay.
Speaker B:Older fishnet used to have smaller holes.
Speaker B:We're trying to add a sexy element to coffee and D and D, I guess.
Speaker E:See, I Thought fishermen just wore them.
Speaker E:So they had backup nets.
Speaker A:They are the net.
Speaker B:They just come away quick.
Speaker A:They just have a zipper in the back.
Speaker B:Quick strips.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:That goes from their ass crack all the way up and they just rip it off and throw it in there.
Speaker C:I mean, we're, we're talking like,.
Speaker B:We're.
Speaker C:Talking around Borat style water panties, as he called them, you know.
Speaker B:Oh, Christ.
Speaker B:Would be like.
Speaker B:Do you guys know historically that Zephyr's not wearing a whole.
Speaker C:That I've.
Speaker C:I've heard nothing about socks.
Speaker C:On the other hand,.
Speaker B:This got derailed.
Speaker B:All right, guys, what the fuck is happening?
Speaker B:Welcome to season four.
Speaker B:Yeah, as I described, Mortal Kombat style, Kumite between all the homies.
Speaker B:So like I said, we had a opening for a person.
Speaker B:So we thought, hey, wouldn't it be cool if we get the two coffee and DND guys to go against each other?
Speaker B:It'd be hilarious.
Speaker A:Aren't you all right?
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker C:Well, I mean, it wouldn't be fair to have, you know, two coffee and D D and not have like other people that have parties or, you know, people with them have the same.
Speaker C:So yeah, it was just.
Speaker E:We're just both too strong.
Speaker E:You couldn't see us in the finals.
Speaker E:So you have to get rid of one of us now.
Speaker C:Yeah, we have to get you guys.
Speaker B:To can enable each other.
Speaker B:I want to see one of you guys come up behind the other person, hit him with a rock in the head.
Speaker A:Well, you won't even see me because I am Houdini.
Speaker B:Abracadabra.
Speaker D:Holmes.
Speaker A:John Cena.
Speaker E:I'm about to just.
Speaker A:You can't see my.
Speaker B:Do you say hands or ass?
Speaker C:Because he said, he said you can't see my ass.
Speaker C:And I'm like, I know.
Speaker C:Yeah, I'm hoping you're wearing sitting on a homie fishnets.
Speaker C:Yeah, don't stand up.
Speaker C:Don't stand up.
Speaker C:This isn't NC17 or whatever that rating used to be.
Speaker B:He was fishing earlier.
Speaker C:That would be fine.
Speaker B:So basically it's like the game show.
Speaker B:Have you guys have played before?
Speaker B:But we made a little twist to it.
Speaker B:So now instead of four rolling a D4 for games, you guys are gonna roll a D12 and you each get a roll one.
Speaker B:But we're gonna start off with one person.
Speaker B:But before with that, I feel like we jumped before the introduction.
Speaker B:Can you guys go ahead and tell everybody who you you guys are and what you guys do?
Speaker C:Show us what you're working.
Speaker A:Hi.
Speaker A:You guys know who I am?
Speaker A:I'm not an I'm not a fisherman.
Speaker A:And, yeah, I'm.
Speaker A:Yeah, you know,.
Speaker C:I. I think he's okay.
Speaker A:My brain just dies real quick.
Speaker A:I'm from.
Speaker A:I'm Mr. Coffee Horse.
Speaker A:I'm the owner and true starter of Coffee and D and D. With me is my cfo Mac.
Speaker E:Yo,.
Speaker B:For a second, I thought he threw up.
Speaker E:West side.
Speaker B:I was like, okay, Matt.
Speaker B:Matt gets down.
Speaker B:You guys can't see, but he's getting a crip walk.
Speaker E:I'm sorry.
Speaker E:Edit too.
Speaker C:Get it.
Speaker C:Get it, baby.
Speaker C:Return of the Mac.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker E:I am Coffee and D. D's CFO and current DM for our season two with these.
Speaker E:Rowdy.
Speaker E:Yeah.
Speaker A:Now, you know why I always said rowdy?
Speaker A:Because you guys are rowdy, and I know.
Speaker C:My character.
Speaker A:We are the homeless going on, and you ain't sharing none of it.
Speaker A:I know.
Speaker B:We're so calm.
Speaker E:It's so chill.
Speaker B:So you guys want to let us know what you guys got going on over there on Coffee and dnd?
Speaker A:Oh, well, other than we have been a couple episodes, almost 10 episodes into season two, we're getting our coffee table talks back up and running with a little bit different of a system.
Speaker A:Still similar interview style, but we decided to change it up a little bit and add some more fun towards the end and throughout our talks.
Speaker A:Other than that, I mean, I'm just working on my YouTube and my other side projects, and Mac is figuring out what other side projects he's going to be working on because we always have something going on.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:We're starting ideas.
Speaker E:We are starting a boy band, Rudy.
Speaker E:Just Rudy and me, though.
Speaker B:Yeah, just start.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker B:Sorry, cj.
Speaker B:You couldn't.
Speaker B:You couldn't hold the tune.
Speaker B:We could carry a note.
Speaker C:We had to cut you out.
Speaker A:Everyone.
Speaker A:Right now, CJ has the biggest middle finger in the world.
Speaker B:That's a long middle finger.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker B:Yeah, we.
Speaker A:To take his middle finger and extend it.
Speaker B:Yeah, we're.
Speaker B:Our boy band name is Boys to Men.
Speaker B:Back to boys.
Speaker C:I thought it was just Boys to Boys.
Speaker E:To Boys.
Speaker A:Oh, you guys didn't go with you?
Speaker A:You guys didn't do with Ass Monkey.
Speaker A:I thought that one was really good.
Speaker E:No, I tried.
Speaker E:I tried, Rudy.
Speaker E:Rudy wouldn't let me.
Speaker B:Oh, yeah.
Speaker B:I was like, I don't know, man.
Speaker B:I think there's some kind of copyright behind that.
Speaker C:What about Sustainable Records?
Speaker B:That's where we're gonna be assigned to.
Speaker C:That is my actual record label.
Speaker C:I.
Speaker C:You not.
Speaker E:Oh, that's sick.
Speaker C:Rudy has seen the paperwork.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:You cannot sign me my one man Kazoo band.
Speaker A:Yeah, bro.
Speaker C:I am a legit music producer.
Speaker B:I guess he wasn't impressed by my kazoo cover of It Smells like Teen Spirit.
Speaker C:It's because it's.
Speaker C:It smells like Teen Spirit.
Speaker B:Was it because I had an asthma attack halfway through the song.
Speaker A:Best of Us?
Speaker E:It happens to the best of us.
Speaker E:All right, cj, you gotta listen to me play fire and flames on my bongos, and then.
Speaker C:Hold on, hold on.
Speaker B:Get my washboard real quick.
Speaker A:My harmonica.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:And then, Dante, you gotta do vocals.
Speaker B:I'm doing no vocals.
Speaker C:Let's see what you got.
Speaker B:How do you think I play?
Speaker A:That's a very phallic shaped skin flute.
Speaker B:I see we found our first groupie.
Speaker C:Are you playing, though?
Speaker E:Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker B:Oh, man.
Speaker C:This is.
Speaker B:This is all right.
Speaker A:This always happens with us.
Speaker B:You know, we derail.
Speaker B:And that's the best part.
Speaker B:This is why season four, we're a little bit more relaxed with the roles.
Speaker D:Now.
Speaker D:Now, because we have Cam on, we have to have the obligatory.
Speaker D:Did you hear about Chuck Norris?
Speaker B:Hold on, hold on, guys.
Speaker A:I was going to make.
Speaker A:I was gonna make a clip, but sadly.
Speaker B:Hold on.
Speaker B:I say we observe a 5 second moment of silence for Chuck Norris.
Speaker A:Oh, man, I really wish I had.
Speaker B:The trumpets on the.
Speaker B:Just do the crows.
Speaker B:All right.
Speaker B:It.
Speaker B:Do the crickets.
Speaker B:We need something.
Speaker C:Oh, I thought we were legit doing a moment of silence.
Speaker B:Yeah, we're gonna do a moment of silence with the crickets.
Speaker A:Ready?
Speaker B:But then I realized if it's just silence, I'm probably gonna cut it out.
Speaker C:Oh, my God.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker D:Thought it was Chuck Norris, not Funk Norris.
Speaker B:RIP Big dog.
Speaker B:Don't laugh at that.
Speaker B:Can we dedicate season four to Chuck Norris in the.
Speaker B:In loving memory of Chuck Nor.
Speaker B:Yeah, they're going to be like, what the.
Speaker B:Why is Chuck Norris on?
Speaker B:Like, you.
Speaker B:You don't know?
Speaker C:If only you knew.
Speaker A:You'd have to watch the start, man.
Speaker C:They'd have to go to the beginning.
Speaker B:Yeah, they'd have to.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker B:If you want to know, we're talking about.
Speaker B:You got to go back and find what is the coffee talk is when we did that.
Speaker A:Yeah, one of our first coffee table talks.
Speaker A:And I think it's just with.
Speaker A:I think it's just with you two.
Speaker B:Yeah, it's me and CJ on the first one.
Speaker B:And then I think the listen to, like, the four episodes of season one.
Speaker B:We brought it up every single time that Cam was up.
Speaker A:Yeah, every time.
Speaker A:And then.
Speaker A:And then like every other coffee table talk after that.
Speaker A:If everyone listens to, like, the old ones, literally, for, like, the rest of the episodes.
Speaker A:Chuck Norris is mentioned in every single episode from that point.
Speaker D:I think it was even a part of Tales from Helheim when we did that.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:So go back and listen to all of that.
Speaker E:Just go back and listen to every episode.
Speaker B:Yeah, just listen.
Speaker A:Got to listen to all of our content.
Speaker B:This isn't just a ploy to get you guys to listen to Chuck Norris.
Speaker B:Oh, man.
Speaker B:So, Coffee, Mac, you guys both been DMing.
Speaker B:How.
Speaker B:What do you guys think is, like, the hardest part?
Speaker B:You guys have had to deal with.
Speaker B:With all of us.
Speaker A:You guys.
Speaker B:Whatever, man.
Speaker B:You love us.
Speaker A:That's why it was a joke.
Speaker A:A joke.
Speaker A:I would say.
Speaker A:Honestly.
Speaker A:Honestly, for me, sometimes it's figuring out because you guys like to do so much.
Speaker A:It's figuring out.
Speaker A:For me, the one thing that I learned and took from our past one is figuring out how to give you guys more time to do all of the things you want and make it feel like you guys get a lot done by doing everything you do want to do.
Speaker A:So I. I think what I learned from you guys is I can be a little bit more sandboxy.
Speaker A:That's something that I'm going to try.
Speaker E:Yeah.
Speaker E:I think normally combat is, like, amazing for me.
Speaker E:This last one I felt was I was having a tough time because I put way too much shit into it.
Speaker E:And I think I've been, like, overthinking a lot of things, kind of doing the same, where I'm just trying to give you as much as I possibly can.
Speaker E:And I need to simplify a little bit so that we can show the amazing creativity of all of you guys.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Like I said, I've had a blast playing with, like, both of you guys.
Speaker B:Dms like you guys.
Speaker B:What you guys do really well is combat.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker B:And it's just like.
Speaker B:But it's like night and day, though.
Speaker B:So I was like, this last battle we had with.
Speaker B:With Mac, I'm pretty sure by the time this come.
Speaker B:No, this.
Speaker B:By the time this comes out, I don't think.
Speaker B:Yeah, we're not gonna be there.
Speaker B:I'm not gonna spoil it, but go ahead and check out.
Speaker A:Just go back to any of the combats that we've already done.
Speaker B:Listen to everything.
Speaker E:That's true.
Speaker B:Shameless Plug.
Speaker B:Listen to everything.
Speaker A:Listen to the aerial fight that.
Speaker A:That should be coming out soon.
Speaker E:That'll be out.
Speaker A:The aerial fight.
Speaker A:You guys gotta go listen to that aerial fight that me and.
Speaker A:Me and Amara had.
Speaker A:That was a dope fight.
Speaker C:You, the Little Mermaid Yep.
Speaker E:Only twice.
Speaker B:They just beat the out of her.
Speaker A:I just pulled her ass out of the water and sucker punched her.
Speaker B:One held her down while the other one just punched and curb stomped her.
Speaker B:Yeah,.
Speaker A:No, I took her little lobster friend and I shoved it up.
Speaker B:Meanwhile, on our end, we learned about friendship.
Speaker C:The mermaid doesn't have an ass.
Speaker E:No, I just had an extra bucket of oil.
Speaker E:That's how.
Speaker C:That's how I got it.
Speaker C:Anything under a 20 is no ass.
Speaker B:I'm gonna just start subliminally plugging like.
Speaker B:Like Sesame street style.
Speaker B:Like, the letter of the day is a 17.
Speaker B:And then by the end of the season when they put everything together and be like, it's gonna be a secret message.
Speaker B:Help me.
Speaker B:They're holding me hostage.
Speaker B:Cam's got a cattle prod.
Speaker A:No, I know what you should do.
Speaker A:I know what you should do.
Speaker A:Okay, hold on.
Speaker A:I gotta.
Speaker A:I gotta make a quick silence because then we can cut this out, because you can't spoil this.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:You spell out Chuck Norris.
Speaker A:You spell out Chuck Norris.
Speaker B:Sick.
Speaker E:Always Chuck.
Speaker A:C, H, U, N, T, N, O. I'm dyslexic.
Speaker B:He's like, ah, the public school system failed me.
Speaker A:School system didn't fail me.
Speaker A:I failed myself.
Speaker E:What is it?
Speaker B:I put a. I think.
Speaker B:I think it was with Scud.
Speaker B:On one of our previous episodes for season three.
Speaker B:I think we were talking about, like, when you post something and then people, like, hateful and.
Speaker B:And they're like, oh, well, this and this and this and, like, just the interaction you get.
Speaker B:I was telling, like, one time I put a meme up and I spelled their, like, wrong.
Speaker B:Like, the wrong there.
Speaker B:And then we had a bunch of people just come after me, like, well, what does this mean then?
Speaker B:I'm not.
Speaker B:I don't speak, like, English is in my main language.
Speaker B:Like, I thought it was this or this.
Speaker B:Like, what does this mean?
Speaker B:I was like.
Speaker B:It means the public school system failed me.
Speaker B:My guy.
Speaker B:And, like.
Speaker B:And then, like, 85 people came in after, like, no, that's the correct spelling for it.
Speaker B:I was like.
Speaker B:I was like.
Speaker B:I really had to hold back.
Speaker B:Going back and like, suck a dick.
Speaker B:I was right.
Speaker B:I knew what the I was talking about.
Speaker D:The letter of the day is.
Speaker B:Big shout out.
Speaker A:The letter of the day is you, Public schools.
Speaker B:Big shout out to my fourth grade teacher.
Speaker B:Ms. Gutierrez.
Speaker B:We made it, baby.
Speaker B:Oh, Christ.
Speaker B:All right, well, this has been really weird.
Speaker B:So you guys ready to hop into the game portion of it?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:All right, do you guys have a D12?
Speaker B:And do you Know the Muffin Man?
Speaker E:I don't.
Speaker A:I know that he lives on Cherry Lane.
Speaker B:He got evicted.
Speaker B:He's, like, three streets down now.
Speaker A:So he's on Dewberry Lane.
Speaker B:He's on Dubai.
Speaker B:He's on Tingleberry.
Speaker B:Hold on, cj.
Speaker B:You need to.
Speaker B:You need to clip that brother.
Speaker B:Just like I was like, that broke.
Speaker B:He's like, dingleberries.
Speaker C:That broke is on dingleberry.
Speaker B:Just back in the background like that.
Speaker B:Dingleberry.
Speaker A:I know.
Speaker A:He did.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker B:All right, Dante, well, this is your part of the game.
Speaker B:Go ahead, buddy.
Speaker D:Go ahead and roll some dice, fellers.
Speaker A:I got a 12.
Speaker A:4.
Speaker B:All right, so do you want to roll with Cam's roll first?
Speaker B:Sure.
Speaker B:A4.
Speaker B:So the first game will be number 12.
Speaker D:So lettuce.
Speaker B:So for the listeners, we changed up the game.
Speaker B:How we do this for this season.
Speaker B:Instead of rolling a D4 with four games that they've already played, we're.
Speaker B:I say we're.
Speaker B:But Dante, really, he went above and beyond on this.
Speaker B:He dunked.
Speaker B:He gave us 12 games.
Speaker B:So every round, we're gonna have the two competitors roll a D, a D12 each, and then that's gonna be the game they play.
Speaker B:But in the next round.
Speaker B:So for the next recording, we lose two games.
Speaker B:So they're going to roll a D10.
Speaker B:And so forth and so forth until we get to the finals.
Speaker E:Oh, that's great.
Speaker A:Two games, and you make a coin flip on which one you get.
Speaker A:Yep.
Speaker B:I got my handy dandy whiteboard, and I will keep score.
Speaker B:I am the ring girl for this one.
Speaker C:You got your handy dandy, white boy.
Speaker B:What?
Speaker E:Rudy, I love your bikini.
Speaker B:It's a mankini.
Speaker E:Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Speaker B:I got the magic fish nets.
Speaker B:Let me go put them on.
Speaker B:I got them at Bass Pro Shop.
Speaker C:You know.
Speaker A:You know your fanny pack's supposed to go.
Speaker A:Supposed to go right there on the front.
Speaker A:Not across you.
Speaker B:That's my colostomy bag, you ass.
Speaker E:Oh, my God.
Speaker A:Do I get a towel, or do I have to just sit in this wet corner by myself?
Speaker B:Here's a sock.
Speaker B:Clean it up.
Speaker A:No, I ain't touching that soggy thing.
Speaker C:Just because it's standing straight up doesn't mean.
Speaker B:What, you guys don't like boomerang socks?
Speaker B:You guys.
Speaker A:Dude, it cracked when it hit the ground.
Speaker A:I don't know what you want me to do.
Speaker C:Came from down under.
Speaker B:It's called shrapnel.
Speaker B:Oh, that'd be terrible.
Speaker B:Imagine that's how you go out, right?
Speaker B:Okay, continue, please.
Speaker B:Before we go Down a deeper rabbit hole, back to our hose.
Speaker B:Or our game show host back to our hose.
Speaker A:Spiraling this.
Speaker A:Damn.
Speaker B:No respect.
Speaker D:All right, so this game is called Rival Adventurers.
Speaker D:Basically, it's going to be a competitive narrative game, and we're going to be sabotaging you throughout the route.
Speaker D:You guys are going to be competing for the same objective, and you have to sabotage each other as well.
Speaker D:So we're gonna have an objective here, and this one is going to be.
Speaker D:You have to save an npc.
Speaker D:There's a burning building.
Speaker D:There's a glorious maiden.
Speaker D:Flames are engulfing her, and we're gonna go action by action.
Speaker D:You guys have to describe what you're doing and try to make sure the other person doesn't complete it.
Speaker D:So get your thinking caps on.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker D:How.
Speaker A:Okay, I have a question real quick.
Speaker A:Do I have access to magic?
Speaker A:How loose are we being with.
Speaker C:With what I can do?
Speaker A:Here is my question.
Speaker D:The loosest of the goosest, brother.
Speaker B:You got a Courtney Love loose on this baby.
Speaker C:Okay, then hot dog down a train tunnel.
Speaker D:All right, so you guys are standing side by side.
Speaker D:Whoever gets to her first saves her and Windsor.
Speaker C:Okay, so I would say that sounds like a D20.
Speaker B:Okay, I was gonna say order of first.
Speaker B:I was just gonna say go.
Speaker B:And whoever said anything.
Speaker C:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker C:Okay, here.
Speaker C:Here's silence.
Speaker C:We'll get.
Speaker C:We'll give him a little bit of silence.
Speaker C:And once Rudy says go, whoever speaks first, just continue on.
Speaker B:Okay, do we give points if they stump the person?
Speaker C:Yes.
Speaker C:If they make it where the other person can't respond, that is extra points.
Speaker B:Sick.
Speaker B:All right, Fuck, let's go.
Speaker C:All right, and now silence until Go.
Speaker B:Choked.
Speaker B:Almost got you.
Speaker A:Go.
Speaker A:I want to put Mac in a force cage, and then I want to start running.
Speaker B:Okay, so, Nick, you want to force page.
Speaker D:What are you doing?
Speaker E:I'm gonna open a. I'm gonna open a teleportation portal straight to the lady.
Speaker B:Oh, okay, I got it.
Speaker B:I got it.
Speaker C:Teleportation.
Speaker C:All right, Coffee.
Speaker A:I got it.
Speaker A:So he teleported there.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Okay, I want to put a teleportation portal.
Speaker A:Underwear.
Speaker A:Under.
Speaker A:Under where he lands to teleport him 100 miles in the other direction.
Speaker E:Okay, I'm gonna put a teleportation portal under Coffee to the center of the earth.
Speaker C:Damn, I thought he was gonna try and, like, counterspell that.
Speaker A:I'm gonna counterspell that, though.
Speaker E:I'm gonna counterspell your counterspell.
Speaker E:And now we are stuck in counter spell lock.
Speaker A:This is how it goes forever.
Speaker E:That's how it goes forever.
Speaker E:100 Miles away, running.
Speaker C:You gotta somehow outdo.
Speaker D:All right, here's the obstacle.
Speaker D:Counterspell is no long.
Speaker C:No, no, no.
Speaker C:You tried counterspelling.
Speaker C:It failed.
Speaker B:Counter spells counterspelled each other.
Speaker B:So now the counter spells are.
Speaker A:Okay then as I start to teleport, I'm going to teleport back to where Mac is and give him an ultimate wedgie.
Speaker B:Ultimate wedgie.
Speaker C:Mac, how are you responding?
Speaker E:I'm gonna respond with a reaction where I don't have underwear and you can't give me a wedgie in the first place.
Speaker C:So he just grabbed bare ass.
Speaker A:Even there is.
Speaker A:And I grab his pants and I.
Speaker E:Pull him over his head.
Speaker E:Who said I was wearing pants?
Speaker E:I'm free balling.
Speaker E:I will grab the girl, teleport back out.
Speaker C:You just see ass.
Speaker E:You just see ass.
Speaker B:That's all you see.
Speaker E:Fly through this portal.
Speaker B:So Mac wins that first round.
Speaker B:Good job, Ma.
Speaker A:I don't know.
Speaker B:I feel like he turned the game when he said he was just free balling it.
Speaker B:I saw the confusion in his eyes.
Speaker A:Called a pervert.
Speaker A:So I'll take that, man.
Speaker E:I'm calling you a pervert for slapping my ass before I went through this.
Speaker B:You only had two options there, dog.
Speaker B:You either just let it go and lose the round or you whack his pee pee.
Speaker B:Those are the two options.
Speaker B:And I do not blame you for taking.
Speaker A:There's only two options.
Speaker B:There's two options.
Speaker B:I. I'm going with you.
Speaker B:You're head deeper here.
Speaker A:I was like, you either work them.
Speaker B:Like a muppet or you lose.
Speaker E:Work him like a Muppet.
Speaker B:You're gonna take him to the rainbow connection.
Speaker B:His peepee.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:Objectively, you made the correct choice on that one.
Speaker A:Yeah, I know.
Speaker A:I.
Speaker A:What am I going to do if.
Speaker A:If he was been free ball this whole time, if he would have started off with he was free balling, I thought I. Dude, you can.
Speaker E:You got it.
Speaker E:Nobody wants to fight a naked man.
Speaker B:Okay, we're going to give you.
Speaker B:We're going to move on to the next scenario.
Speaker C:They have done that and that is proven.
Speaker C:You start stripping when you're walking at someone, they will run the away.
Speaker E:Exactly.
Speaker B:We're gonna move to the next scenario.
Speaker B:You guys get one counter spell and you guys get two teleports.
Speaker B:We're gonna limit it.
Speaker B:This was wild.
Speaker A:No magic and just have us fist fight this out?
Speaker B:No, I feel like the magic adds to it.
Speaker B:But the counter spell shit would kind of counter spell.
Speaker C:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker E:There.
Speaker C:There's no end.
Speaker C:And there's only two dispels.
Speaker D:Next scenario.
Speaker D:You guys are two esteemed world renowned hunters, both going after the same target.
Speaker D:It's an elder griffin.
Speaker D:Motherfucker is monstrous.
Speaker D:Big ass claws, screeches and blows your eardrums out.
Speaker D:You track it to the center of a jungle clearing and you find it there, shimmering in the sunlight.
Speaker D:You guys are seeing it from opposite ends of the clearing.
Speaker D:First one to kill the monster wins.
Speaker E:Okay.
Speaker D:And douche, I mean, go.
Speaker A:I want to prepare part of my action.
Speaker A:This, this is a multi parted action.
Speaker A:And I will take.
Speaker A:Take the time.
Speaker A:I want to pull out my nuclear launch code device and I want to set it on the ground and start typing in the launch codes to drop a nuke on this griffin.
Speaker E:So while he's waiting for the nuke, I'm going to cast meteor swarm directly on this griffin.
Speaker B:Oh.
Speaker A:I'm going to counter spell his meteor storm as I finish typing the codes.
Speaker B:Oh, all right.
Speaker A:I know I have an action before.
Speaker E:It shows up, so that I will teleport the griffin straight to me.
Speaker E:With a knife in my hand, I.
Speaker A:Will tell you both the location of the nuke.
Speaker D:Now, now here's.
Speaker D:Here's an obstacle.
Speaker D:You have to bring the carcass back, so.
Speaker D:Oh, you know, maybe you don't microwave it.
Speaker A:Oh, I'm microwaving him.
Speaker B:He's like, I'll take the loss, but.
Speaker A:I'm taking them out.
Speaker B:There will be nothing left.
Speaker B:Let me run that back real quick.
Speaker B:Mac, did you say you teleport to the griffin with a knife?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker E:I don't question.
Speaker B:Your idea is like, you know what?
Speaker B:You know what?
Speaker B:Let's reenact Beat it with a griffin.
Speaker E:Exactly.
Speaker B:This is what I really want.
Speaker E:Well, if we get.
Speaker E:If me and this griffin get teleported back under this nuke, the griffin's dead.
Speaker E:Yeah, I think we're just both dead.
Speaker E:I'm gonna.
Speaker E:I'm gonna polymorph us both into cockroaches.
Speaker E:Survives.
Speaker A:After the nuke goes up and doesn't obliterate the cockroaches.
Speaker A:I want to teleport and take both of the cockroaches.
Speaker A:I don't want to walk back through my portal back to where we started.
Speaker B:Okay, okay, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Speaker B:So the cockroaches would survive the nuke, but I don't know if you would.
Speaker B:Coffee?
Speaker E:I don't think coffee would survive the nuke.
Speaker A:I have plot armor.
Speaker A:I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker B:Not here.
Speaker B:You don't baby our.
Speaker B:You got fisherman fish nets and thigh high socks, and that's all you got here.
Speaker E:That's all that's leaning like a.
Speaker B:See, if you would.
Speaker B:You would have used your last turn Aura farm instead of putting in the new code.
Speaker B:We would have given you the plot armor.
Speaker A:But I think.
Speaker E:You got Aura farm to gain the plot armor.
Speaker B:Exactly, brother.
Speaker B:You got a.
Speaker B:It's loading.
Speaker B:I think Mac takes that one.
Speaker B:I think you accidentally nuked yourself, my boy.
Speaker A:I don't think anyone killed the grip.
Speaker D:Yeah, no, it's still alive.
Speaker B:Okay, but it's just me and this griffin can.
Speaker B:Renee.
Speaker A:Okay, I reenact Beat it as cockroaches.
Speaker A:Wouldn't that turn it back into its.
Speaker A:Into its form if you just polymorphed it and you didn't.
Speaker A:True, polymorph.
Speaker A:You just polymorphed it so it would come back to a griffin.
Speaker A:As I come back from hell with a shotgun, I want to shoot this griffin in the head.
Speaker B:I like how you guys came with, like, mortal weapons.
Speaker B:You're not like, oh, I want, like, a staff of the Magi.
Speaker B:Like, no, I want a knife, and I want a gun rainbow style.
Speaker A:I got an elephant rifle.
Speaker B:You know, one of them big ones.
Speaker A:Just go.
Speaker C:I'm just coming with a howitzer.
Speaker E:Oh, yeah.
Speaker C:I am mortaring the.
Speaker C:Out of that.
Speaker C:Getting a mortar strike.
Speaker D:Brought a knife to a staff fight.
Speaker E:I brought a knife to a nuke fight.
Speaker B:Okay, okay, so.
Speaker B:So we had.
Speaker B:You died.
Speaker B:You came back from hell.
Speaker B:You shot the griffin in the head.
Speaker C:Mac, what is your rebuttal?
Speaker E:I. I am currently a cockroach.
Speaker E:So I start dragging the griffin with me.
Speaker E:As I.
Speaker E:As you see, my.
Speaker E:My cockroach muscles explode, and I pull this.
Speaker E:Oh, I do, actually.
Speaker E:I have one teleport left, and I will teleport me and this griffin to Dante as I bring him back this griffin carcass.
Speaker D:All right, now, here's the Shyamalan twist.
Speaker D:The griffin was actually the lady from the first scenario.
Speaker B:Polymorph, you monster.
Speaker E:So I brought you back the lady as well.
Speaker E:That's all I'm hearing.
Speaker C:He just.
Speaker C:He just wanted a Damn it.
Speaker E:Dead body.
Speaker B:Okay, I don't know who gets the point, because Coffee killed them, but Max stole his killer.
Speaker A:Yeah, I thought it was the toilet.
Speaker A:I shot it.
Speaker E:I brought back the car.
Speaker E:I'd say we could each get half a point.
Speaker B:I'll give you Coffee killed it.
Speaker E:Coffee killed it.
Speaker E:I brought it back.
Speaker B:All right, I'll give you each a point on that.
Speaker B:That's fair because coffee killed it.
Speaker B:But Max stole your killing.
Speaker B:Brought it back.
Speaker B:I was like, I shoot it in the head.
Speaker B:I'm like, I perform CPR to keep him alive.
Speaker E:Dante.
Speaker E:You just see my little, my little cockroach hand.
Speaker E:Here you go.
Speaker B:Raise the dead.
Speaker A:Reincarnate.
Speaker E:Okay.
Speaker A:Different person.
Speaker B:Okay, so I think we got what, one more Dante on this game, correct?
Speaker D:Yep.
Speaker D:All right, so here is the last one.
Speaker D:You have to retrieve an artifact.
Speaker D:You've heard tale that there's a holy sword at the bottom of a temple.
Speaker D:So you guys both walk up as treasure hunters.
Speaker D:You have to get through the, the maze that's within and just know that there are traps and monsters and anything else that you can throw each other into.
Speaker C:Plenty of surprises along the way.
Speaker D:There also happens to be a boulder rolling at the back of you guys.
Speaker D:So you should probably run going now.
Speaker D:Or just stand there and die.
Speaker E:I. I think that's exactly what happens.
Speaker A:I was waiting for Mac to go first.
Speaker A:I was waiting for you.
Speaker C:Let's do, let's.
Speaker E:I'm.
Speaker E:I'm gonna call it audible.
Speaker E:Let's do no teleports.
Speaker E:Just running and just running.
Speaker A:Just running.
Speaker B:Indiana Jones style.
Speaker E:Let's die about.
Speaker E:All right, well, I, I just take off and jump over a 20 foot spike pit.
Speaker C:Surprise, motherfucker.
Speaker E:It's a 50 foot spike pit.
Speaker E:We'll come back to what you're gonna do to save yourself after coffee.
Speaker A:I'm going to run and I'm going to hit an acrobatic wall, jump off of this, off of one of the sidewalls to jump over the 50 foot spike pit and wave at Mac as he starts to fall in.
Speaker B:Surprise.
Speaker B:That was a fake wall.
Speaker A:Where do I land?
Speaker A:Where do I.
Speaker E:Go into something through the wall.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:So we'll come back to you as you're thinking your feet are gonna hit and they just start going through.
Speaker C:So Mac, you are currently thinking you're at the end of the pit, but you're just gonna start diving.
Speaker C:What do you do?
Speaker E:I pull out my grappling hook to shoot forward and pull myself to the next bit.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker C:So as, as you're going, starting to go through, you see Mac do his grappling hook.
Speaker C:What are you doing?
Speaker A:What the fuck is happening?
Speaker A:At this current moment,.
Speaker C:You are currently flying through a fake wall into a void.
Speaker A:Into a void.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:That was the Clarif dedication I needed.
Speaker A:Where the am I landing bag of Holden?
Speaker E:Oh, no.
Speaker E:Watch out for the bag, man.
Speaker C:Prison bag of holding.
Speaker A:I'm gonna Cast jump on myself and I'm gonna jump in the air.
Speaker B:Oh, you're gonna double jump.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker B:Double Mario action.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker C:Castlevania up in here.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker C:He knows what's up.
Speaker A:How tall are these walls?
Speaker A:Just a question.
Speaker C:Well, where you're currently jumping from and from where you would have jumped.
Speaker C:I would say, what, maybe 20ft left 15.
Speaker B:Somewhere around there.
Speaker E:Okay.
Speaker E:Yeah, just wondering.
Speaker A:I'm gonna try to land somewhere safe.
Speaker A:Wherever they may be.
Speaker D:Jump off of Max head.
Speaker C:It would be where Max at.
Speaker A:If I goomba him, does that kill him?
Speaker A:Does that work?
Speaker B:You land on my shoulders and I'm.
Speaker E:Pulling both of us.
Speaker E:Now I would.
Speaker B:I would like to go back and quote coffee from season one.
Speaker B:You can always try.
Speaker C:There's only one way to skin a goat.
Speaker C:Taxidermy.
Speaker E:Oh, geez.
Speaker D:Oh, whose turn is it?
Speaker E:I think it's mine.
Speaker B:But are you giving me a sabotage.
Speaker E:Or am I doing something?
Speaker B:I don't know.
Speaker B:So, so far you've got grappling hook and you're going.
Speaker B:Grappling hook?
Speaker B:He just double jumped behind you?
Speaker B:Yeah, I don't think he's necessarily sabotaged.
Speaker E:Just the walls in front of me, I guess, or the ceiling in front of me to try and pull me across the this 50 foot spike trap.
Speaker E:And I guess if I make it, I will roll through a door.
Speaker E:A giant door closing as I reach back and grab my hat.
Speaker E:Just the last second.
Speaker B:You get a style point for that.
Speaker D:Style point.
Speaker D:Drip point.
Speaker C:All right, so as you see that going on, Mr. Coffee, what are you doing?
Speaker A:As I land safely on the ground, I'm hoping I'm then going to cast speed on myself.
Speaker A:I'm gonna figure out some weird twisted way to cast it a bunch of times.
Speaker A:So then I start vibrating and I vibrate through the door.
Speaker A:Vibrate your molecules.
Speaker A:Vibrate my molecules through the door.
Speaker C:At least you didn't cast pee on yourself.
Speaker C:So that's a good thing.
Speaker D:The.
Speaker D:The door slams shut behind both of you and it's very, very dark.
Speaker D:All of a sudden you hear hissing all around you.
Speaker D:Mac, what's your move?
Speaker E:I pull out my snake spray and keep running.
Speaker B:I like to pull up my bear, my snake pepper spray, my bear mace.
Speaker B:Snake face,.
Speaker E:Pull out the snake face.
Speaker C:I kind of don't want none of this.
Speaker B:What is like the, like the 50s Batman, he had the shark repellent spray.
Speaker E:Spray my snake repellent all over me and then light up, light a match to use it as a flamethrower.
Speaker E:Trying to get through all these.
Speaker C:When you light that match, you see that?
Speaker C:It's not snakes.
Speaker C:It's really up like giant mutated cats.
Speaker E:Oh, that.
Speaker E:I'm running faster.
Speaker A:Since I'm hyped up on so much speed right now.
Speaker A:It hasn't.
Speaker B:Rephrase that, big dog.
Speaker B:Rephrase that.
Speaker E:I will not.
Speaker B:I want to roll to steal Max catalytic converter.
Speaker C:All right, this with the role.
Speaker C:He succeeded.
Speaker D:You, you're running really fast, right?
Speaker D:And.
Speaker D:And cats, like, they have that hunter prey drive.
Speaker D:All of a sudden, they all focus on you and they start chasing after you, leaving Matt completely free.
Speaker A:Max one being chased.
Speaker A:Max being the one being chased.
Speaker E:I think you're the one.
Speaker B:They both took off, though.
Speaker A:Oh, I didn't run.
Speaker A:I didn't.
Speaker A:I didn't get to stay my turn.
Speaker A:I have all this speed.
Speaker A:I'm gonna start spinning around like a beyblade with katanas in my hands.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker D:I'm just gonna.
Speaker A:You know the Mario twist.
Speaker A:I'm just gonna be doing that jumping down the halls.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:Okay, so, judges, we need to debate this, though.
Speaker D:He made.
Speaker D:That's a style point.
Speaker B:That is a style point.
Speaker B:Okay, so we have to debate this out.
Speaker B:What would get a cat's attention more?
Speaker B:Somebody running from them or somebody with a flamethrower.
Speaker B:With the flamethrower or somebody spinning in the middle of the room with katanas.
Speaker A:I'm jumping forward.
Speaker A:Like in Mario, when you're doing the spin jumps flying through the hallway.
Speaker C:Yeah, but what you got to think about torches on the walls as you're going by, you're putting them out, but as you're passing each one before they're put out, they're glinting from that light.
Speaker C:So you got a brief second of.
Speaker B:Glint, you turn yourself into a laser pointer, my boy.
Speaker A:Yeah, they're going to be going every direction but where I am.
Speaker B:Good point.
Speaker C:Yeah, he's.
Speaker C:He's probably going to have one that might chasing me.
Speaker B:He's a cracked out, my boy.
Speaker B:Maybe.
Speaker B:Hold on.
Speaker B:Run it back.
Speaker C:Do that.
Speaker C:I was scratching, bro.
Speaker B:All right, so you're going full disco ball.
Speaker B:Freaking bit by a skater.
Speaker B:Disco fever.
Speaker C:All right, so, Mac, what are you doing?
Speaker C:We got disco fever.
Speaker E:Disco fever.
Speaker E:I've been running with my flamethrower of snakes snake repellent.
Speaker C:So are you gonna running with it or are you going to continue Stop running with it as a laser show?
Speaker E:If the laser show is happening behind me and these are cats going after this laser show, I'm taking off, I'm.
Speaker C:Going to say with him doing the disco thing.
Speaker C:You're probably going to have one or two on you as well.
Speaker C:You're going to have a bunch of them going in different directions.
Speaker C:One that's going to follow your light because a.
Speaker C:A glint would have shined in your way.
Speaker C:And then you have the one that's like super cracked out, that just saw coffee before he even started spinning or before it got like supersonic spin.
Speaker B:Okay, question.
Speaker B:Are you guys wearing bell bottoms while you're doing this at all?
Speaker A:I'm always wearing the little boombox on my ass.
Speaker A:Is playing dancing.
Speaker C:Why is the boombox on your ass?
Speaker A:Where else am I gonna put it?
Speaker A:I'm spinning like a beyblade.
Speaker A:Where do you want.
Speaker A:Need to put it?
Speaker B:Strap it to your chest.
Speaker D:He's got a.
Speaker B:Came hooking it up.
Speaker D:Fishnets.
Speaker A:Nope, I got it.
Speaker B:I got.
Speaker C:Got fish on there.
Speaker A:Got my fish nets up to my neck, you know, hanging out.
Speaker E:Tactical this.
Speaker C:Tactical.
Speaker C:Molly.
Speaker C:Fish nets.
Speaker D:Tactical.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker C:Hey, just saying for the.
Speaker C:For the baby bjorn.
Speaker C:I'm.
Speaker C:I'm looking at baby bjorn.
Speaker C:I you not it.
Speaker A:Okay, what do we put ly in a Bjorn.
Speaker B:He is short enough.
Speaker B:He's only like five foot something.
Speaker B:He's like five two.
Speaker C:I'll give it a shot next session.
Speaker E:There we go.
Speaker A:We just make one of you big.
Speaker B:Okay, so, Mac, you fried those cats behind you, and you've successfully chopped them into tiny pieces with your disco Beyblade.
Speaker B:What are you guys doing next?
Speaker D:You guys are standing there now in a room full of cat corpses with like, just little glints of fire coming off of them.
Speaker D:You can barely see each other.
Speaker D:All you know is it smells really weird in there and you need to.
Speaker C:Make the next move and you do not see any visible exit.
Speaker A:I got something.
Speaker A:At this point, I don't care if I win.
Speaker A:I'm just going for style points if I don't win.
Speaker A:Let me.
Speaker C:Let me stop you guys before.
Speaker C:Before you even start going next.
Speaker C:I think this would be a nod in the right direction.
Speaker C:You just hear something that sounds like sand falling in an hourglass, but in a few different directions.
Speaker C:Very, very subtle, but you hear it.
Speaker E:Do I get to a wall, like in front.
Speaker B:Of.
Speaker E:Or is it just darkness?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Is it just darkness?
Speaker C:What do you think, Dante?
Speaker D:I mean, you can vaguely see walls as the flames flicker.
Speaker E:Okay, I want to Kool Aid man my way through one of these walls.
Speaker B:There's a style point.
Speaker A:I got.
Speaker A:I got.
Speaker A:I think I got.
Speaker A:I'm glad you didn't go.
Speaker A:My.
Speaker A:This is gonna be good.
Speaker A:As I watch him kool Aid Man.
Speaker A:I want to make sure I have a good run up as I start to do the Mario 6 Super Mario 64 speed glitch to launch myself through the maze to in one of the directions of the hourglass.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker A:And I make those noises the whole time I'm doing it.
Speaker B:And you've well earned your style point.
Speaker C:So.
Speaker C:So that is a style point.
Speaker C:But the sound that you're hearing, you land and you feel a pile of sand on the floor.
Speaker C:You don't know how far away from your original location it was, but you feel a pile of sand under your feet and you feel it growing.
Speaker E:Am I in the same spot after I Kool Aid man my way through, or am I in a different spot?
Speaker C:You're so you're through.
Speaker C:You can hear it, but you don't feel anything.
Speaker C:The piles haven't begun getting big enough for you to notice from a distance or where you're at yet.
Speaker E:I'm like cast detect object on this artifact so I can figure out exactly where it's at.
Speaker D:Smart.
Speaker E:And.
Speaker E:And head that direction.
Speaker B:All right, so with that you get a little ping in your mind and you kind of see like little line on the ground.
Speaker B:Like do you know how it was like in case of earthquakes and the power goes out?
Speaker B:Follow the lines on the ground.
Speaker E:Can it be like in my line of sight?
Speaker E:The.
Speaker E:The map from GTA pops up and shows me which way I'm going.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:For sake of funny, yes we you can GTA Max.
Speaker E:One of those giant arrows pops up above my head to point me where I go.
Speaker A:As I stand on this sand.
Speaker A:I then perform a perfect dune doom scream as I summon my treasure hunting sand worm to then ride me through some of this sand to bring me to the artifact.
Speaker D:All right, so you come into this open chamber.
Speaker D:You see the sword in a stone with a single ray of moonlight breaking through the temple ceiling, illuminating it from behind it.
Speaker D:A tall, very stocky, very built man, probably 15ft tall.
Speaker D:You see his silhouette appear.
Speaker D:He steps forward into the silhouette of light, and you can make out a karate ghee and a ginger beard.
Speaker D:How do you react?
Speaker E:So I see the artifact.
Speaker A:I see this me on a giant sand worm.
Speaker E:I see this giant sandworm and coffee.
Speaker D:Also from an unforeseen speaker somewhere in the room, you hear Sephiroth's boss theme.
Speaker B:I'll point Dante.
Speaker B:Okay,.
Speaker A:Hit us with the Sephiroth.
Speaker B:Jesus.
Speaker B:Y' all are going down.
Speaker E:I wanna hit.
Speaker E:I want to hit the.
Speaker E:The like link from Super Smash Bros. Hiya.
Speaker E:Where I Just spin.
Speaker E:And I grab this dude and I grab the relic and swap them places and take the off.
Speaker D:As you go to reach for him, he grabs your arm and breaks it, crushing it immediately.
Speaker B:And you see comes out from under his beard and snaps your wrist.
Speaker C:And you see right behind him, Sephiroth's sword start appearing.
Speaker A:My turn.
Speaker A:Can I just have my giant fucking 200 foot fucking long sandworm just eat this 15 foot guy?
Speaker D:As the sandworm approaches him, he slurps it like a fucking spaghetti noodle.
Speaker A:Cool.
Speaker A:Okay, that's.
Speaker A:That's kind of scary.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:You just had your fucking arm broke.
Speaker A:I did.
Speaker E:I'm debating on healing or I think I'm going to try and cast.
Speaker E:He's gonna charm person at ninth level to get this bearded man to help me get out of here.
Speaker D:It's ineffective.
Speaker D:He's not a person.
Speaker D:He's a force of nature.
Speaker E:He's a force of nature.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Okay, my turn.
Speaker A:You know the box from Snake.
Speaker A:I'm gonna hit the box from Snake and I'm slowly gonna sneak up to this relic.
Speaker A:Relic watching.
Speaker A:Making sure he doesn't.
Speaker A:Doesn't see me.
Speaker A:This huge force of nature.
Speaker A:And I'm slowly just gonna sneak the relic into my box.
Speaker A:And then.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And slowly start sneaking away.
Speaker C:You didn't say which box, so.
Speaker A:I did.
Speaker A:I did.
Speaker A:I did say.
Speaker A:I said.
Speaker A:I said the snake box.
Speaker A:Box from like any snake game where it gets in the box.
Speaker C:I mean, technically you said you walked up with your snake box and then you just.
Speaker D:It was actually a box filled with snakes.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:I don't care.
Speaker A:Got snakes in it.
Speaker A:I'm still sneaking.
Speaker A:They can bite me.
Speaker A:I'm just gonna be grabbing this relic.
Speaker D:I think that passes.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:How do you react?
Speaker E:I grow my own ginger beard and you see a fist come out of it through the box to grab Coffee and run both of us out of there.
Speaker A:Can I cut his arm off as it shoots into my box with the sword?
Speaker E:I am now a force of nature.
Speaker E:And clipping that.
Speaker C:Can I cut his arm off as he puts it in my box?
Speaker B:What did we learn from this?
Speaker B:You don't put your arm in Coffee's box.
Speaker C:Unless it is welcome.
Speaker B:All right, hold on.
Speaker B:Hold on.
Speaker E:Judges.
Speaker B:Do we accept that?
Speaker B:Did Mac turn into a force of nature?
Speaker E:Did I turn into a force?
Speaker E:I believe I did.
Speaker D:I mean, anything's possible if you believe.
Speaker C:Didn't say you couldn't.
Speaker C:We just said there was no magic.
Speaker B:Okay, so he grabs you and the relic and runs out.
Speaker C:He just went so far out of the.
Speaker A:The relic like this.
Speaker D:It wasn't even magic.
Speaker D:It was actually just a delayed mutation from the nuke earlier.
Speaker B:The roach nuke.
Speaker B:Okay, so as you guys leave this place, Mac holding you and you holding.
Speaker A:The relic like I'm like, wrapped around it like this.
Speaker A:Like, you'll have to pry it off of me.
Speaker C:I don't know.
Speaker B:He's a force of nature.
Speaker A:He may be a force of nature, but I am made of stone.
Speaker B:Okay, so you guys arrive to Dante and you deliver the relic slash, coffee.
Speaker C:I would say they both get another point.
Speaker B:Another point.
Speaker B:All right, and that is the last round for that.
Speaker B:So adding up style points.
Speaker B:Okay, Coffee, you have four points at the end of this game.
Speaker B:Mac, you have five.
Speaker B:You're by one.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:As we reach.
Speaker A:My style points saved me my style points.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:The.
Speaker B:The deep pull of the Super Mario glitch is what.
Speaker A:Yeah, dude, I had.
Speaker A:I had.
Speaker E:I. I was pulling out everything, brother.
Speaker B:That was in the.
Speaker B:That was lock and loaded.
Speaker B:He knew he wanted to do that.
Speaker B:I know.
Speaker A:I was like, I hope Magn doesn't think of, like the same thing a little bit.
Speaker A:So I'm like, I really hope he.
Speaker C:Does to think of this because this.
Speaker A:Is going to be so fun to do.
Speaker E:That was so good.
Speaker B:You want to do the next game?
Speaker C:That would have been great.
Speaker B:That would have been hilarious.
Speaker B:Actually.
Speaker B:I flipped the map upside down, so he's actually going backwards.
Speaker C:O upside down.
Speaker C:Casual.
Speaker C:I love it.
Speaker A:I turn the relic into a star and I capture it like Mario.
Speaker C:Super Mario Sunshine.
Speaker B:All right, then.
Speaker B:Then the second game was game four.
Speaker D:All right, so this one is called Lie or Lore.
Speaker D:This is going to be a deception based trivia slash improv hybrid where you guys are going to be mixing truth and fiction.
Speaker D:So each player is going to give three statements.
Speaker D:Two true, one false.
Speaker D:And then the.
Speaker D:The opponent has to guess which one is alive.
Speaker D:So.
Speaker C:When you get.
Speaker C:We'll give you time to do your statements.
Speaker C:We'll, you know, banter, and that way you could send them to one of us if you can, and then we can share it or whoever.
Speaker C:That way we at least have your separate answers so we know you know who's going to go with what.
Speaker B:All right, and while you guys do that, we're gonna riff here.
Speaker C:Well, all right, hold on.
Speaker C:He's.
Speaker C:He's finished explaining.
Speaker D:We're not just gonna have like, general, like, hey, I like the color green.
Speaker D:No, this is gonna be like dnd based.
Speaker D:And we got a couple prompts, so we're gonna start With.
Speaker E:Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker D:Monsters abilities.
Speaker D:So you have to present three different monster abilities.
Speaker D:Two true, one false, and the other has to guess.
Speaker E:Okay, I have to spit it from memory.
Speaker D:I mean, you're the DM dog.
Speaker B:I'll be right back.
Speaker B:This is the best part about having DMs play against each other.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:So while that's going on, I'm gonna go ahead and riff here a little bit.
Speaker B:All right, New season, season four.
Speaker B:Guys, what's your walkout song?
Speaker B:If we could legally obtain the rights to Music.
Speaker C:Something Slaughter, Lorna.
Speaker B:Well, of course, the little Breakdown in Banditos.
Speaker C:I'll just.
Speaker C:I. I will walk out to the whole song of banditos.
Speaker E:That's a.
Speaker B:Okay, that's a solid pick like that.
Speaker B:I would have said that's a long walk.
Speaker D:You're just straight up doing laughs around the ring.
Speaker E:Yeah, the.
Speaker B:What is it?
Speaker B:The just that 10 second little alligator guttural role he does in.
Speaker B:Was it Viking?
Speaker C:Yes.
Speaker A:Or.
Speaker C:Or hear me out.
Speaker C:What if.
Speaker C:What if we went a little retro?
Speaker B:I was about to say you legally cannot play music.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker C:No, no, that.
Speaker C:This.
Speaker C:Thankfully, I can.
Speaker C:That one.
Speaker C:That one boss track we made at work.
Speaker B:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker C:This one.
Speaker B:We make music now.
Speaker B:I'm gonna level you, brother.
Speaker B:I cannot hear anything.
Speaker B:I've like, vaguely.
Speaker B:Yeah, yeah, I know.
Speaker B:Yeah, I know the song.
Speaker C:Oh, yeah.
Speaker C:No, you know, there we go.
Speaker C:That's why the Bluetooth had disconnected.
Speaker B:God damn it.
Speaker B:The.
Speaker B:On the earbuds that my lady gave me for.
Speaker B:Was it Valentine's Day?
Speaker B:I want to say it was like Valentine's Day.
Speaker D:The.
Speaker B:The, like the little voice.
Speaker B:The Bluetooth connected or Bluetooth pairing is like the fakest British accent ever.
Speaker B:And I was like, what the.
Speaker B:I said, that's wild.
Speaker C:Yeah, that.
Speaker C:That's what you guys.
Speaker B:Okay, so you did the sick ass 8 bit song.
Speaker B:What about you, Dante?
Speaker B:What's your walkout song?
Speaker D:I mean, obviously it's Barbie Girl.
Speaker B:That is a great one.
Speaker B:Hold on, hold on.
Speaker B:We doing.
Speaker B:Are we doing the.
Speaker B:We doing the Slaughter Prevail cover like cj or you're just doing the original?
Speaker B:Gotta be OG okay, you doing Aqua.
Speaker B:Hey, Barbie, you want.
Speaker B:You hear me out.
Speaker B:We remake that song, but instead of it being a girl, that's Barbie.
Speaker B:It's just a cholo.
Speaker B:It's one bottle.
Speaker C:Come on, Barbie, let's go party, huh?
Speaker B:No, no, other way, dude.
Speaker B:You're thinking about the dude.
Speaker B:No, it's got to be the other way.
Speaker B:The girl's got to be the.
Speaker B:The OG Hey, Barbie, you want to go for a ride.
Speaker B:What the you say to me about them?
Speaker B:Well, you want to.
Speaker B:You want Potassos Female.
Speaker B:All right, that's a solid one.
Speaker B:Just Barbie Girl by Aqua.
Speaker B:That's a great walkout song.
Speaker B:I think I'm changing.
Speaker B:I'm changing mine from last season.
Speaker B:So instead of Jiglo by Baby no Money.
Speaker D:God damn.
Speaker D:That was so good, though.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:With or without the Transylvania version by.
Speaker E:Coffee, I think I won Diabetes.
Speaker B:I think that my walkout song for season four would be Equipped Sunglasses by Hot Mulligan.
Speaker D:That's solid, dude.
Speaker A:That is.
Speaker A:You want me to tell which one is the lie or just making you guys also guess?
Speaker C:No, we're.
Speaker C:We're just.
Speaker C:We're.
Speaker C:We're just the commentators and judges, so.
Speaker B:We're a third party entity.
Speaker C:Oh, is that like the Greek hero boaties?
Speaker B:Nope, it is not like the Greek hero titties.
Speaker B:It's more like that car that.
Speaker B:It's like a Suburban that starts with the Y. I don't remember what it is.
Speaker B:Yukon, you can suck on these nuts.
Speaker B:We got this.
Speaker C:We will see you guys on the next.
Speaker B:We'll see you for season five.
Speaker B:That's how we end.
Speaker B:This is.
Speaker B:God.
Speaker B:God damn it.
Speaker B:I didn't think that was actually gonna work.
Speaker B:Ah, that's awesome.
Speaker B:You gotta love that.
Speaker B:You gotta love when a plan comes together.
Speaker B:Oh.
Speaker D:I mean, before it was a meme.
Speaker D:You absolutely slaughtered me with the mind.
Speaker B:Goblin too, so I'm gonna go hipster on that.
Speaker B:I was doing that before he was popular.
Speaker D:You really?
Speaker C:So who did you guys send it to?
Speaker A:Okay, I sent my questions over to you.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker A:To you, Rudy.
Speaker A:I send them to you, Rudy.
Speaker B:Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker B:So do I have to read them is the thing, or do they read them so they.
Speaker C:They can read their own and then the other one guesses?
Speaker B:Okay, so I just have the answer.
Speaker B:Oh, sick.
Speaker B:I got the answer key here.
Speaker B:Hey, Mac, I'll sell you it for 50 bucks.
Speaker C:I mean, so.
Speaker B:So how badly do you want to win?
Speaker C:How do we.
Speaker C:How do we want to play this?
Speaker C:Do we want to give them the opportunity to try and fiber their way out of being called out?
Speaker B:Yeah, dude, they can.
Speaker B:They can, like, try to do different inflections when they read it to try to throw off people or.
Speaker B:Liar.
Speaker C:Hell yeah.
Speaker B:Full deception.
Speaker B:My guys.
Speaker E:I just sent you mine too, Rudy.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker C:All right.
Speaker C:So two truths, one lie.
Speaker C:Who do we want to go first?
Speaker D:Flip a coin?
Speaker B:Hold on.
Speaker B:Was it all about the same creature or was it three different creatures?
Speaker D:Any general monster ability state Statements.
Speaker E:Oh, a statement about it or the ability?
Speaker A:I did a statement.
Speaker A:I did statements about the creatures.
Speaker A:That's what I did.
Speaker A:Yeah, about, like, about the abilities or like their stats?
Speaker A:Like, that's what I did.
Speaker A:I did two truths and one lie about their stats or.
Speaker A:Or what they can do, their capabilities.
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker D:Do you want to make any edits?
Speaker C:All right.
Speaker D:I think it's fair.
Speaker C:So here I am sharing my screen.
Speaker B:Yeah, dude, this is the.
Speaker B:Is this the wheel that we use to determine the all the who's playing who?
Speaker C:This is the wheel.
Speaker B:I feel like we should have live streamed that.
Speaker B:That would have been fun to see this.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker C:You know what?
Speaker C:Next tournament, if there is one, we will do that.
Speaker C:We will live stream the teams tournament next time.
Speaker B:Oh, my God, that'd be such a nightmare.
Speaker B:Dude, it was so hard to get everybody on the same schedule now.
Speaker B:It was.
Speaker B:Yeah, it was a nightmare.
Speaker B:I don't know how.
Speaker C:This is insane trying to get this going.
Speaker C:Yeah, because we have people from, you know, other parts of the world.
Speaker C:Like, it's.
Speaker C:It's been interesting, but God damn, we're making it work.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:All right, y' all ready to spin to see who goes first?
Speaker D:Is this going to be the presenter or the guesser?
Speaker C:Your Dante's choice.
Speaker B:Oh, damn beans.
Speaker C:All right, so we have Matt.
Speaker D:All right, Matt, you're going to be presenting your two truths and one lie to Mr. Kofi.
Speaker B:Okay?
Speaker A:I want to see his face.
Speaker A:How do I get rid of this thing in my face?
Speaker B:I want to see the fear in his eyes.
Speaker E:I still maybe need to fix mine because I put.
Speaker E:I put abilities that I found.
Speaker B:Oh, that's okay.
Speaker B:That's what?
Speaker B:That's a Red Bull.
Speaker B:I thought you were just taking a fat rip right now.
Speaker B:I was like, party on, brother.
Speaker C:Party on.
Speaker B:Wayne, is coffee ripping a dab mid recording?
Speaker C:No, he was not jealous, brother.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker E:I feel like I need.
Speaker E:I need Dante.
Speaker E:I need you to give me an example so I know what the I'm doing, because I up somewhere.
Speaker A:I'll give you one.
Speaker A:Like.
Speaker A:Like vampires have.
Speaker A:I think it's sun sensitivity.
Speaker A:Like, that's an ability they have.
Speaker A:So saying a vampire doesn't have sun sensitivity would be a lie.
Speaker A:Or, you know, whatever.
Speaker A:Something like that.
Speaker B:A vampire has a witness, has a wing.
Speaker A:A vampire has 12 bones in its neck.
Speaker E:These are the same creature or different creatures.
Speaker C:Jokes, Whatever you want to do vampires, you're served.
Speaker E:But if you do multiple.
Speaker A:I did three different creatures.
Speaker E:Okay, I got you.
Speaker A:Although I was gonna do the same creature, but I was like, nah, I'll do three different ones.
Speaker D:If you really, really like werewolves for some reason, you know, if you got.
Speaker B:A weird werewolf fetish, go for it.
Speaker C:By All London, if you like to.
Speaker A:Stare at them werewolf titties, it's okay.
Speaker B:What the.
Speaker E:I really, really.
Speaker C:Wait, wait, wait.
Speaker E:Isn't.
Speaker E:Don't kink shame.
Speaker C:Isn't that just furries.
Speaker A:Put that.
Speaker A:I want that on my soundboard,.
Speaker B:Mac,.
Speaker A:We're recording that later.
Speaker C:I want that.
Speaker C:Wait there.
Speaker C:You're recording furries later?
Speaker B:No.
Speaker B:I don't know what kind of weird streams y' all are doing.
Speaker B:He's like, stop, furries, man.
Speaker C:You're like, we're recording that later, brother.
Speaker D:That was the next game.
Speaker B:The next game is guess how many titties on a werewolf roll for titty.
Speaker B:You would think, too, but then I don't know.
Speaker A:So are we 12?
Speaker A:Because there's, like, an option of, like, one to 12 titties.
Speaker A:Is that what it is?
Speaker E:No.
Speaker B:How many titties does a dog have?
Speaker B:I don't know.
Speaker A:Actually, a dog can have anywhere from, like, 4 to, like, 12.
Speaker B:I don't like that you had that.
Speaker A:Off the dough, because I have.
Speaker A:I had a dog that had puppies, so.
Speaker B:Coffee's like, I'm done with this.
Speaker A:I.
Speaker A:What the.
Speaker A:Genuinely what the.
Speaker B:Okay, but I'm gonna sidetrack us real quick.
Speaker B:Cj, what kind of be like with this dog?
Speaker B:Oh, this one, because I saw you drinking on.
Speaker B:I'm kind of jealous.
Speaker B:I finished all my water.
Speaker B:I was like, man, I wish I would have bought a be like.
Speaker B:And now I know for next.
Speaker B:Next recording.
Speaker B:It doesn't say it's flavor.
Speaker B:It's lemon.
Speaker A:Luman.
Speaker B:Just make sure we cut that.
Speaker E:Okay, so, yes.
Speaker C:This is not a brand deal.
Speaker B:I'm.
Speaker E:I'm gonna hope that I'm doing this right.
Speaker A:You could have gone with what you had.
Speaker A:It just would have been a little bit tougher for me, probably.
Speaker E:Well, I found these abilities and then forgot what creatures they were attached to.
Speaker E:I had to go back.
Speaker B:Solid, bro.
Speaker B:You can't win if he doesn't know what the answer is.
Speaker E:Exactly.
Speaker A:They all sound like true statements because I don't know which one could be a lie.
Speaker B:Alrighty.
Speaker B:So everyone to send me them over so I can have them.
Speaker D:Everyone knows goblins breathe fire.
Speaker C:Oh.
Speaker E:Oh.
Speaker E:I still gotta send you through things.
Speaker E:Can you just trust me?
Speaker C:Goblin fire.
Speaker B:You know what?
Speaker B:I will trust you.
Speaker E:Oh, yeah.
Speaker E:Okay.
Speaker E:Because this is gonna be a lot to type if you want me to do this in.
Speaker E:In the next two seconds, I just.
Speaker B:No, perfectly fine.
Speaker B:Run it, and then we'll verify it at the end.
Speaker E:I will be very honest.
Speaker B:We got you.
Speaker B:You got this.
Speaker B:I trust you.
Speaker B:Look at that face.
Speaker B:That face look like he lied to us.
Speaker B:Exactly.
Speaker B:I mean, I hope so.
Speaker B:It's two truths, and a lie flipped.
Speaker D:Us off, so I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker B:He's a force of hatred.
Speaker B:He can't control himself.
Speaker E:Exactly.
Speaker A:Sucks for you.
Speaker A:I'm immortal.
Speaker E:All right, you ready?
Speaker E:Yep.
Speaker E:So a Demogorgon has a slam attack.
Speaker E:Zario has Devil Sight.
Speaker A:Away.
Speaker A:Damon.
Speaker E:And a witch kite has a malevolent flair.
Speaker C:A what?
Speaker B:A witch kite, like on a string.
Speaker A:Devin Gorgon has Slam.
Speaker A:Zarya.
Speaker C:Zariel.
Speaker A:Zariel.
Speaker A:Like, we're talking the demon Zariel.
Speaker B:Correct.
Speaker E:That's the one I'm talking about.
Speaker A:I just want to make sure I'm thinking the right thing.
Speaker A:And then the last one, A magic.
Speaker A:Magic.
Speaker E:A magic kite.
Speaker A:Which kite?
Speaker A:Oh, I'm gonna go with the first one as a lie.
Speaker A:You.
Speaker E:That one is.
Speaker E:The lie does not have slam attacks.
Speaker A:They have a claw attack.
Speaker A:It's not a slam.
Speaker E:They don't have a claw attack.
Speaker A:They don't attack.
Speaker B:They have a tent.
Speaker E:Because they have.
Speaker E:Because their hands are tentacles.
Speaker A:I forget about that.
Speaker B:All right, so coffee.
Speaker B:Got the point for that.
Speaker B:So now we're tied at five.
Speaker E:Okay.
Speaker A:Ready, Mac?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:A Bone Naga can cast spells.
Speaker A:A Zong has Treasure Sense like a Z.
Speaker A:And a Gorgon has a 22 AC.
Speaker E:The Gorgon is probably the one that's throwing me off the most because 22 is pretty high for an AC.
Speaker E:And Gorgons are.
Speaker E:I think they're crazy 15s somewhere around there.
Speaker E:They might be higher.
Speaker E:What was the first one?
Speaker A:A Bonaga can cast spells.
Speaker E:I'm like, 99.
Speaker E:Sure.
Speaker E:A bone Naga can cast spells.
Speaker D:What is a Zong?
Speaker A:A Zong.
Speaker A:It's a very.
Speaker E:That is a very interesting creature, too, y'.
Speaker B:All.
Speaker B:Gatekeeping Zongs.
Speaker A:You don't want to fight a Zong.
Speaker A:I'll tell you that right now.
Speaker E:Fight a Z.
Speaker A:You don't.
Speaker A:You will actually.
Speaker A:You want to hate D and D a little bit.
Speaker C:That zebra in a thong.
Speaker E:I think I'm.
Speaker E:I think I'm gonna go with the 22 AC.
Speaker A:I think it's less than that.
Speaker B:Oh, okay.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:So that ends the game.
Speaker A:It's a 19.
Speaker E:Yeah.
Speaker E:What's the CR16?
Speaker A:It's a CR.
Speaker E:Oh, I was so close.
Speaker A:You were so close.
Speaker B:So Matt gets The point for that.
Speaker B:And that brings us to the end of our games today.
Speaker B:Max got six points, Coffee's got five.
Speaker B:You beat him by one point.
Speaker B:By one.
Speaker B:One.
Speaker B:A goddamn point.
Speaker C:All right, that's that.
Speaker C:That was close, though.
Speaker A:Double or nothing.
Speaker A:Heads or tails.
Speaker E:I'm taking my win and running.
Speaker B:Hold on, hold on.
Speaker B:I'm taking my win and running double or nothing.
Speaker B:Max running with his win.
Speaker B:We're already over time on the episode.
Speaker B:We went over by like 20 minutes.
Speaker E:I reserve the right, though, in the next match to to phone a friend and call Coffee to help me.
Speaker B:He's not gonna answer you, man.
Speaker B:This ain't my problem.
Speaker B:This is you, Coffee.
Speaker E:This is for us.
Speaker A:It's probably good they don't have me back on because every time I'm on here just goes.
Speaker B:All right, man, so that was a beautiful game.
Speaker B:Great sportsmanship here.
Speaker B:I'm surprised Coffee didn't throw something.
Speaker A:Good,.
Speaker B:But there's still a lot of throwing time left.
Speaker B:All right, guys, thank you so much.
Speaker B:Coffee, unfortunately, you will not be returning for next round.
Speaker B:Mac, congratulations.
Speaker B:You're moving on to the next round.
Speaker B:We'll see.
Speaker E:Represent us proud.
Speaker B:We'll see who you play for.
Speaker B:The winners next episode.
Speaker B:We have Kaylee from Reps and Respawns playing Lilith from Demoness to impress.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:Over on Instagram.
Speaker B:You'll be playing one of them.
Speaker E:I'm gonna.
Speaker A:If you don't, you should have took.
Speaker D:The double or put a Zong in your bed.
Speaker E:I told them.
Speaker E:I told them right at the start.
Speaker E:We are both too strong.
Speaker E:That's why they can't see us in the finals.
Speaker E:That's why I will be.
Speaker A:That's why they had to have you come in.
Speaker B:We hate to see a strong independent DM win.
Speaker A:He had to.
Speaker D:He had to.
Speaker A:You guys had to bring him in to take me out because you knew.
Speaker B:Yeah, we had a.
Speaker B:We had a certified hater there.
Speaker E:Everybody gets mad when a white boy gets some ocean.
Speaker B:They call him Ranch because he be dressing.
Speaker B:All right?
Speaker B:So thank you guys so much for being on both of you.
Speaker B:If you guys want to check them out, go ahead and check them out on Coffee and D and D and coffee table talk, you guys.
Speaker B:Besides that, you guys got anything you need us Plug, Can I do it?
Speaker E:Go check out my beautiful Mr. Coffee Horse on Twitch and YouTube streaming every Tuesday, Friday and Saturday.
Speaker E:I miss gaming with him, so I need to tell everyone else to leave me the alone so I can have time to do it.
Speaker C:My bad, bro.
Speaker E:I know they asked me to be on this.
Speaker E:I should be gaming right now.
Speaker E:What the.
Speaker B:We can do both, dog.
Speaker B:I will mail you a goddamn Tamagotchi.
Speaker E:Those things are worth like hundreds of dollars now.
Speaker C:I have a little thing full of like seven of them.
Speaker A:You should nail the winner.
Speaker A:Tamagotchi.
Speaker B:I will pay you for a Tamagotchi so we can mail it to them.
Speaker E:I have to find the rarest one that I can now check out.
Speaker B:Check Out Cam on his game streaming.
Speaker B:Where can they find you on that?
Speaker A:That?
Speaker A:You can find me at Mr. Coffee Horse on Twitch and on YouTube.
Speaker A:You can also find me at my socials at Mr. Coffee Horse.
Speaker E:That's.
Speaker A:That's what it is.
Speaker A:Come hang out.
Speaker A:I mean, other than I have.
Speaker A:I do DND and I do this.
Speaker A:I have a lot of fun.
Speaker E:So it's a fun time.
Speaker B:Oh, yeah.
Speaker B:And then you can also catch him as a player on the Coffee and D and D Season 2 campaign.
Speaker E:Go check out our socials at Instagram and Tick Tock Coffee N dnd and come listen to Rudy and CJ also cause some chaos on this.
Speaker A:Yeah, they're over there all the time.
Speaker C:There's always tic.
Speaker B:Check out our beautiful DM Mac DMing season two.
Speaker B:And you guys come back.
Speaker B:You guys can hear him in the next round.
Speaker B:Well, next tournament round, he moves up to the.
Speaker A:What is it?
Speaker B:Semifinals.
Speaker B:And then we want to say a very special thank you to all of our sponsors.
Speaker B:We get a breath of this.
Speaker B:If you guys want to have some delicious mead to really accoutrement for the game you play, to really bring it to life, go ahead and check out Good Time Mead on Instagram.
Speaker B:Check out our collab with Reps and Respawn in the Reps and Respawn shop for our custom chat one and Done times.
Speaker B:Reps and Respawn custom dice.
Speaker B:You guys want to.
Speaker C:Those will be in on Monday.
Speaker B:I'm gonna roll all the other games that we play on this.
Speaker B:I'm only going to be rolling with those dice.
Speaker C:There you go.
Speaker A:Check out our sponsors, dude.
Speaker B:If you guys want to pick up some of the best minis in the game right now, go ahead and check out Fireball figurines.
Speaker B:If you guys ever wondered if dragon meat was smoky or if.
Speaker B:If Chimera had a bit of a bite to it, go ahead and check out mythical meats.
Speaker B:If you want your guys's beard to smell like a million plat, check out Beard Sorcery.
Speaker B:If you guys want to get some custom woodwork done, if you guys want to get maybe some Custom cosplay equipment made.
Speaker B:Check out Magni Craftworks if you guys want to check out some just sick ass merchandise.
Speaker B:In general, check out the Wicked Goblin merchandise for all your beauty, hygiene and cosmetic needs.
Speaker B:Check out the Wulff Den over on Instagram.
Speaker B:And if you guys need just a little shot in the ass to get you moving, to wake you up, check out Dragon Roast Coffees.
Speaker B:Thank you so much, all of our sponsors.
Speaker B:Thank you guys to our players.
Speaker B:Thank you guys to our host, Dante cj.
Speaker B:I know this is first actual episode of the tournament.
Speaker B:Thank you guys so much for all the hard work, hard work you guys have been putting in behind the scenes.
Speaker B:We couldn't do this without you guys.
Speaker B:I love you guys.
Speaker B:I love you guys as well.
Speaker B:We just love all you guys so much.
Speaker B:All right, and with that, that's pretty much all the I gotta spew.
Speaker B:Go ahead, cj, take them away.
Speaker C:And with that, we can say that this guy has a very wide angle.
Speaker C:Almost mixed that up there.
Speaker C:But for our first annual, because yes, this could be a regular thing.
Speaker C:Who knows?
Speaker C:Depending on how much you guys love it, which we're sure you will, we will bring it back.
Speaker C:But thank you to our contestants, Mr. Mac and Mr. Coffee Horse.
Speaker C:We appreciate you guys for coming on, dueling and beating each other into oblivion in these contests.
Speaker C:We appreciate the fuck out of you.
Speaker C:Make sure to check them out.
Speaker C:Show them love.
Speaker C:Make sure to check all our shit out and show all of our shit love too.
Speaker C:And please, please pay your tab when you leave the tavern or Dante will have to find you.
Speaker C:And you don't want that.
Speaker C:You do not want that.
Speaker D:I do.
Speaker C:And with that, I think it's.
Speaker C:I think it's time.
Speaker C:Come on, guys.
Speaker C:Last fucking call.
Speaker C:Come on.
Speaker C:Get mock.
Speaker A:The dice are down, the tail is spun.
Speaker A:Another quest on Chat one and done.
Speaker A:Raise your mugs, the night is won.
Speaker A:Roll again.
Speaker A:When next we come from nat1 fails to legends be gone.
Speaker A:Thanks for joining chat1 and done.