Manifestation without shadow work is dangerous, because desires born from old wounds carry the same patterns into a bigger prison. Lorin describes shadow work as going into the mud and bringing light into the parts of ourselves we would rather avoid. The episode explores where our desires really come from, how conditioning fuels false urgency, and why receiving what we want before we are ready can become the greatest misery. Lorin offers three questions to discern soul from ego, then shares research on how positive fantasies can slow progress and how visualizing the process improves results. Listeners come away with a practical path to aligned manifestation: pairing clear goals with honest inner work so they grow into what they seek and enjoy the journey.

Mentioned in this episode:

Healing the Mother Wound - Brand New Edition
A 2.5-hour live online workshop with Lorin Krenn

Shadow work is the internal practice that is much less sexy and much less instant gratification than manifestation.

Get it now.

Experience all the abundance, the greatest love, and all of that shadow work is confronting.

Shadow work is challenging.

Shadow work is going into the mud, bringing consciousness and light into the darkness, into places that you might want to avoid.

Imagine you meet your divine partner, but you are so identified with your emotional wounding that you self sabotage it to the degree that you can't be together.

Is that what we want?

Unless you know that you will keep manifesting from a false sense of urgency, from a sense of desperation, and from your own unchecked shadow and wounding, which will only create a better and bigger prison.

Welcome to the Masculine and Feminine Dynamics podcast.

My name is Loreen Kren and I help people get to the core of their deepest challenges in relationships, purpose and life.

I do this through my trademark coaching mythology called the the Core Method.

If you haven't subscribed yet, subscribe now so you never miss an episode.

Manifestation without shadow work is dangerous.

What do I mean by that?

Let's use an example.

You might say, I want the divine union, my soul partner, my soul union in this life right now.

And that's beautiful.

Of course, have that intention.

And at the same time, are you actively working on your shadow?

Are you aware what patterns and your own conditioning that you're bringing into the relationship?

Another example, you might say, I want the deepest success now.

I want it to happen now.

I'm so ready.

You feel that urgency, you feel that impatience, you feel it needs to happen now.

And the question is, are you grounded enough spiritually in order to hold this level of success and not lose yourself in the process, not have your ego take the lead needs and stop being humble and stop being authentic and stop being yourself.

So we need to ask this question.

Where are our desires to manifest something coming from?

We need to understand the why.

The why is more important to understand than the what, because.

The what is informed by the why.

However, many of us are not actually aware of what we really want at a soul level, at the deepest, most truthful level inside us.

We want things based on ingrained and conditioned voices of our mother, of our father, of our peers growing up, of generational trauma, of wounds we carry.

So what happens when we manifest from wounding?

We only create more wounding because we're manifesting from an energy, an energy that is already stuck, an energy that has a false sense of urgency, an energy that says, I need this now.

Why?

To fill a void.

Right?

So this is where we Begin where we get really practical.

And we will get more and more practical throughout this episode.

How can you discern whether it's coming from your ego, from your conditioning, or it's coming from your soul?

When it's coming from your soul, there is no false sense of urgency.

Yes, of course you want it and you would love for it to happen right now.

You're very open to that.

Of course you welcome that.

However, you have a peaceful desire rather than an extremely urgent, it needs to happen.

An excessive kind of internal resistance.

Resistance, because this is the key thing to understand.

A desire from your ego, a desire from conditioning is actually a resistance to the present moment.

It's a resistance to where you are right now in your journey.

It's a resistance to.

To your own soul, to your deeper path.

Because if it hasn't happened yet, maybe, just maybe, there is a reason for it.

Maybe there is something that still needs to move into alignment.

Maybe there is a part of you that still needs maturing.

And that's where shadow work comes into play.

Shadow work is the internal practice that is much less sexy and much less candy and fast and instant gratification than manifestation.

Get it now.

Experience all the abundance, the greatest love, and all of that shadow work is confronting.

Shadow work is challenging.

Shadow work is going into the mud.

Bringing consciousness and light into the darkness, into places that you might want to avoid, but it's absolutely necessary.

Otherwise you are.

You're.

You're not taking your whole and true self with you.

You're leaving parts of yourself somewhere in the dark and try to manifest something.

But eventually you have to unearth these parts that you have left behind.

So here we get to a really important truth that most people don't understand.

The greatest misery is not to be stuck.

The greatest misery is to get the thing you want, but to not be fully ready for it, to not be anchored for it, to not be mature enough to actually make the most of it and enjoy it to the deepest level in this life.

Imagine you meet your divine partner, but you are so identified with your emotional wounding that you self sabotage it to the degree that you can't be together.

So is that what we want?

Imagine you get the highest level of success.

Yes, beautiful.

But imagine you lose yourself in your ego because you're not yet grounded enough.

You're not yet humbly rooted in your deepest truth and in your soul's calling.

Would it not be better if getting these things when we are truly ready, so that we can actually enjoy and be conscious in the process of experiencing the thing we desire the most.

Really let this land for a moment.

Could it be that you're not being punished?

And all these false urgency and constantly feeling stuck and comparing yourself to other people.

Could it be that that is actually an intelligence?

That it's not, oh, I'm stuck, they have it better.

And comparing yourself.

But could it be that there is a deep reason behind it?

And all you asked to do is to take all your parts with you.

All you're asked to do is to mature all these parts inside you.

And that is the most important thing.

There's nothing wrong with manifestation, but shadow work is much more important.

Shadow work is more important because it allows you to unearth and to figure out who you truly are and what you truly want and what you truly came for in this life as a soul.

Unless you know that you will keep manifesting from a false sense of urgency, from a sense of desperation, and from your own unchecked shadow and wounding, which will only create maybe a better and bigger prison.

Because here is another truth I have to share with you.

If you're manifesting from wounding, then maybe you get the thing, but you'll be stuck in the thing as well.

There will be certain the same patterns, the same environment and dynamics that are making you feel stuck now will manifest in a different way when you get the thing you think you want.

So what you actually want is to transcend these patterns.

But you think it's that one thing.

But the patterns come with you.

They just manifest then in a different way.

This we cannot outrun the shadow work.

We cannot outrun the deep internal work of how some people attribute this to Carl Jung, whether it was him or said this, but this idea of that, your roots, the roots of the tree, your roots have to dig deep into hell, into the darkness, in order to go to heaven.

Before you go manifestation, more amplification, you have to root yourself deeply.

And this is shadow work.

So now let's go deeper and let's look at some of the powerful research around this as well.

Carl Jung wrote about that when an inner situation is not made conscious, it happens outside as fate.

In other words, he said, until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

Something else he said is, and this ties directly into this.

One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.

So Carl Jung is one of the most powerful examples of this, where he speaks about, in his work, about the process of individuation, which others would call enlightenment.

Or the journey of self realization, realization.

But one thing is absolutely clear, and it's not just from Carl Jung, but from many others in ancient history and the ancient teachings.

We cannot be truly free if we do not face our own inner darkness.

And as mentioned before, even if you get the thing you want, it's not gonna give you the relief you think.

It's going to give you the real relief, the real liberation and the real freedom that can only come from shadow work, can only come from going into the mud, going into the darkness and looking at the parts inside you that you would rather avoid.

Yes, there is no instant gratification, but you get long term peace, right?

Manifestation is like that instant candy.

You feel great in the moment, manifesting and all of that.

But there is no long lasting peace from changing your outside external circumstances.

Now, as we go deeper, there are three powerful questions I want to share with you that I've written down and jotted down before this episode.

And here I want to make this really practical.

The point I made before.

How do you know it's soul or it's coming from the ego?

I talked about the false urgency already and filling a hole, right?

Or filling a void, which is the ego, and that the soul is more of a peaceful desire.

Yes, you want it, but you're also at peace if it takes slightly longer because you trust that there is a deeper intelligence and a deeper meaning and purpose behind it taking a little longer than your ego might want.

However, there are three ultra powerful questions you can ask yourself that are going to help you to really laser focus on discerning that and really come to a deeper answer.

Actually quite quickly ask yourself these three questions.

You can write them down.

Who am I trying to prove something to?

If there is an energy of trying to prove something to someone, you always know it comes from your ego.

Your soul doesn't desire to prove your bullies, even though they shouldn't have bullied you.

I was bullied as a child as well.

And of course I had this egoic desire in me.

I want to prove them how successful and how.

But that is still the energy of wounding.

That's not manifesting and creating from my deepest truth, authentic core, my soul.

So it's really important.

If there's any element of needing to prove something to someone, you need know it's false urgency.

You know it comes from the ego, you know it comes from wounding and it won't bring any, it won't bring any relief.

Even if you were to show your bullies or whoever you think you need to prove it to.

It's like a two second relief.

Okay, you showed them.

Now what?

The feeling remains.

There is nothing.

There's no long lasting peace there.

Question number two.

What pain would this make go away?

Slightly awkward phrase question, but stay with me, this is really important.

What pain would this make go away?

Ask yourself, if you get that thing that you desire the most, what pain do you think it's gonna solve?

Really?

Be honest with yourself.

You have to answer honestly.

Because the immediate answer might be, well, nothing.

That's not.

That's not why I wanted.

That's fine.

I'm not saying that's the reason.

But ask yourself honestly, is there something you're hoping deep down without actually being fully aware of it until now?

Is there something you hope that's gonna go away or you're gonna get rid of when you get the thing?

If that's the case, very high chance.

There is a lot of ego and conditioning in it.

And question number three.

Would I still want this if nobody ever knew I had it?

Would I still want this if nobody ever knew I had it?

Now this is where it gets interesting.

It ties in some way to the first question, but it kind of brings the whole thing back home or it writes the whole thing home.

Don't know if this is the right terminology or phrase, but I think you get the gist of what I'm trying to say.

So if no one could see that, is that still what you want?

And that is why the soul desires peace.

The ego desires to be seen and validated, achieving something.

Right?

Because our unchecked shadow, or our ego, our conditioning, false beliefs and programmed voices from other people in our childhood, which we have ingrained and internalized and seeming.

They are seemingly like our own, but they're not our true inner voice.

You can very quickly spot, well, that many of these desires are about being seen.

Many of these desires are about other people recognizing you, getting somewhere and achieving something.

Right?

But the soul does not care about other people.

It's completely irrelevant.

Hence why there might be a part inside you that wants one life where you're recognized and seen by everyone.

But another part inside your more quiet part, wants stillness, wants peace, wants true fulfillment.

One part inside you might want.

I want millions and millions of dollars.

Another part inside you, which doesn't contradict it, but it's just more grounded.

I want abundance and peace.

I don't want the highest amount of financial success, but costing me my soul and peace.

I want to be abundant.

I want to have a life of Freedom.

You can see how sometimes they contradict each other.

But it's almost like the desires from the soul are more whole.

They're focused on higher virtues, not on the virtue of being validated, recognized, or being seen.

Which is the ego and conditioning or our shadow, so to speak.

The soul wants higher virtues.

Integrity, freedom.

True love, true peace.

Right?

True liberation.

Right?

Big, big difference.

So ask yourself these three questions.

Jot down honestly your answers and you'll be able to identify, is this coming from my soul or is this coming from my ego?

And one of the greatest moments of relief can be where you let go of things that don't come from your soul.

Because it's like a weight.

It's this constant pressure.

Why is there pressure?

Pressure means resistance.

Why is there resistance?

Because your soul is telling you, I don't want this thing.

This is actually not the highest ideal that I aspire to.

It's not the highest reality.

So hence why people can be so deadly unhappy, but highly successful, high thriving.

Everyone tells, I want this life.

I want their life.

I want their life.

But deep inside, if you were in their body and in their consciousness and in their experience, they might be completely miserable and unhappy because their soul is actually resisting this and telling them, I'm stuck.

This is not what I truly want.

I took some notes on this, on the research around this.

There is more research which is really, really interesting.

So psychologist Gabrielle Ottingen studied positive fantasies for decades across dieteers, students, job seekers, love seekers, and people recovering from injury.

She found those with the strongest positive fantasies about reaching their goals were less likely to achieve them.

Those with the strongest fantasies of wanting to achieve their goals were less likely to achieve them.

So let's make this practical, because this is very, very important and is very interesting.

They lost fewer pounds, got worse grades, received fewer job offers, stayed lonely for longer, and recovered from injury more slowly.

For example, women in a weight loss program who fantasized most positively lost less weight after a year.

And graduates who fantasized most about getting a job received fewer offers and earned less two years later.

Her explanation?

People overlooked the obstacles and temptations on the way to their wish.

People overlooked the temptations and obstacles to their wish.

So this is where it gets really interesting, because here I'm gonna give you one of the most powerful practical things to take with you from this episode.

Visualization has enormous power.

However, instead of Focusing on only on achieving the high score, visualizing, studying, being immersed in the journey, being immersed in the process was much more powerful.

What does this tell us?

Well, it goes back to a cliche, extremely important, saying it's about the journey and not the end result or the destination.

It's about who you become in the journey.

And if we only focus on the end result, it's like focusing on the instant gratification.

We're not focusing and honoring who we have to become in the process.

The obstacles we overcome and transcend spiritually, emotionally, mentally.

So manifestation constantly only focusing on the end result means bypassing the level of resilience and strength.

Strengthened spiritual emotional strength.

You need to cultivate in order to overcome the obstacles and trials that we all face to evolve and get the thing we wish for.

This is a much more grounded approach because you're not saying there will be the greatest obstacles and I'm stuck, but you're saying obstacles and trials are to be expected.

So my manifestation practice is not about getting to the destination.

My manifestation practice is about making the most of the journey and getting myself into a powerful, energetic internal state as I'm moving through obstacles.

Because this actually creates a much higher chance of actually getting the thing I wish for.

Because I become the person, I merge with that reality.

Because I become the person who's ready and mature for it.

And that's the difference.

Shadow this, what I just described, becoming the person on the journey is taking all with you.

It's maturing, it's shadow work.

It's looking at the parts that you need to transcend and work on.

Only focusing on the candy and the end result is essentially bypassing the shadow work.

Psychotherapist John Wellwood coined the term spiritual bypassing, which is essentially using spirituality to avoid complex, challenging or perceived negative emotions or darker emotional states that we go from.

So, again, we need to be very mindful.

Manifestation without shadow work can be dangerous or lead us on a journey of being stuck and suffering.

Because there's a high chance we're bypassing certain patterns or negative traits that we have to overcome and work through through in order to actually fully, consciously enjoy, experience and receive the reality that we most wish to create in our lives.

Now let's look at what shadow work practically looks like.

Like, how can we apply this and implement this with everything we've discussed right now?

It really goes back and begins with the practice of noticing where.

Where are you resisting your current reality.

Yes, I understand.

Of course, you need to have a part inside you that is not satisfied with where you're at.

In order to bring the ambition and energy and drive to create a new reality.

I do understand that the idea is not to be in a difficult life situation and kind of spiritually bypass and say, I love it.

Because if you're honest with yourself, of course you don't love it.

Of course you want to get out of it.

All I'm saying is there are a lot of nuances here, and we have to be mindful.

So what's really important to understand is instead of how can I get away, how can I get rid of this pain?

The question should be, what parts of me still need maturing so I can fully receive, consciously and experience the thing I want the most?

If you ask this question in this way or in a similar fashion, then instead of looking at the candy and instant gratification, Manifestation actually becomes a powerful spiritual practice.

Where you look into the inner world and look at the parts that need maturing and growing up spiritually and emotionally and mentally, perhaps in order to experience the thing you want.

And I mean fully experience it.

Not just have it and then sabotage it, but fully experience it and fully feel worthy of it.

So that allows you to immediately focus on certain patterns, on certain traits inside yourself that you might need to transcend.

So instead of constantly focusing on some kind of end result, false urgency, and getting away, you're going deeper into your inner world.

You're finding out who you truly are.

You are working for deeper patterns and bringing your focus there.

And when you do that, and couple that with a clear direction and a clear goal and a clear thing of what you want, you bring the two together.

And we can call this aligned manifestation.

Aligned manifestation is your soul working through you to create the reality you most desire at the absolute deepest level.

Your calling, why you're here as a soul, or why you chose to be here.

If you wish to believe in that right.

Manifestation without shadow work is strengthening your own ego and shadow and negative tendencies or dysfunctional patterns.

But aligned manifestation is the art of letting your soul lead.

And no longer allowing ego conditioning or wounding to drive you on your path of your goals and your visions for the future.

Rather than trying to escape the present, present moment, escape and avoid certain parts in yourself.

You go deeper into yourself.

And as you venture deeper into yourself, you find out who you truly are.

And as you find out who you truly are, you start creating towards the reality that actually aligns with your soul.

This doesn't mean you're always happy.

This doesn't mean you enjoy every moment.

Yes, it might be really challenging to work through certain obstacles and trials, but you bring a completely different energy.

You are more grounded, you are more present with the journey.

You're actually learning from your triggers, you're learning from your trials.

You're not trying to escape and spiritually bypassing.

And as you do this, you do shadow work and manifestation and creating the reality you want together.

You bring them together.

You root your roots deep into the earth and then you go up and the roots are holding you.

If there is a storm, that is fine.

If there is a temptation, that is fine.

You are fully rooted.

You have matured deeper parts and integrated deeper parts.

This is what integration means.

We want to take all parts of us into our journey.

We don't want to leave parts behind because we can never ever truly leave something behind.

Eventually, if we truly want to be free, we have to go back.

And going back is painful and it's challenging and there might be a lot of self sabotage.

So instead of saying, how can I finally get to where I want to get to?

All we need to ask is what parts inside me need to mature?

What parts inside me might not be fully ready?

And to honestly sit with that, to honestly be with that, not to be stuck in that, not to stop believing, believing that it's possible, but to honestly be with that.

And you will surprise the insights, the guidance that will come through you, you start to actually enjoy the journey.

And in that you become energetically the person of your highest dream, of your highest reality already now.

And if you can't enjoy the journey, why would you enjoy the destination?

Thank you for listening.

It's a true honor to have you here.

If you haven't subscribed yet, subscribe now so you never miss an episode.

Thank you.