Artwork for podcast The Grief Code
Sneaky Tricks That Add To The Confusion
Episode 21516th September 2022 • The Grief Code • Ian Hawkins
00:00:00 00:08:44

Share Episode


Episode Summary

In this episode, Ian shares his perspective on how language is utilized to create change in people. He also dives into the unfortunate length that some people reach wherein they use this ability to manipulate others.

Don’t miss:

  • Learning to make a decision for yourself and not because you are tricked into taking an action for others’ advantage.
  • Understanding better communication and developing your awareness to recognize manipulation.
  • Acknowledging the importance of awareness and knowledge of the language used to create change in people.
  • Recognize the tricks that are adding to your confusion and learn how to avoid or minimize it.
  • The more you are conscious of the world around you, the more you can navigate it in a way that will positively help and guide you on your journey.

About the Host:

Ian Hawkins is the Founder and Host of The Grief Code. Dealing with grief firsthand with the passing of his father back in 2005 planted the seed in Ian to discover what personal freedom and legacy truly are. This experience was the start of his journey to healing the unresolved and unknown grief that was negatively impacting every area of his life. Leaning into his own intuition led him to leave corporate and follow his purpose of creating connections for himself and others. 

The Grief Code is a divinely guided process that enables every living person to uncover their unresolved and unknown grief and dramatically change their lives and the lives of those they love. Thousands of people have now moved from loss to light following this exact process. 

Check Me Out On:

Join The Grief Code Facebook group:




Start your healing journey with my FREE Start Program 

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Coach podcast, thank you so much for listening. 

Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. 

If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at

You can also stay connected with me by joining The Grief Code community at and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal, please subscribe and leave a review on your favourite podcast platform.


Ian Hawkins 0:02

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfillment and contribution to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm a Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you during this episode, please send me an email at info at the and Hawkins And let me know what you found. I know the power of this work, I love to hear the impact these conversations have. Okay, let's get into it.

Once you see it, you can't unsee it once you learn about how language is used to manipulate people. Yeah. You see it everywhere. For the people who have done any sort of training around language, and some of you may be familiar with the concept of neuro linguistic Neuro Linguistic Programming, easy for me to say. We'll be familiar with how people can use words to create change in people. Now, unfortunately, many people have taken that method and use it to manipulate people. And you see it in sales of any kind, whether you're buying a fridge to seeing signage on a on a shopfront. There's language there that is used deliberately. Our song that I like says it's like, when when the hell did advertisement get like narcotics? And it's like that sometimes, right? Why did I buy that? Or what I was even drawn to that. And it's because of this language that's used. And there will be other times where you're like, why can I make a change? How can I keep getting drawn back into this. And it's because this sort of language is used. Now, this popped up for me, I was looking at a an ad for a specific marketing I was looking at. And really a lot of the guys still watch the video opted in for the free thing as you do. And then watched the video on the page after that. And he used the phrase by now, right meaning by now you would have seen this, this, this and this. But what that says to your brain is by as in be why now. Now, if any of you have been to be like conferences, where they're selling something, then they use this language all the time. And it's important to be able to look out for that language so that you can make a decision based on what you know is true for you not based on being slapped being coerced into something. And it's the same when you're making decisions on anything. What was really interesting was is that well, that didn't surprise me, right? And that space is a lot of people actually call him out on it. And the reply was, well, I didn't even it's a script someone else right? So didn't even realize it was it was there, which I thought was a lot of shit. But anyway. Because if you're not looking at what you're saying and vetting it, then it's out of integrity, right? It's not authentic. And then for a provider I have for a product that we all use without going into specifics. I did a preliminary part of purchasing purchasing it. And then I got a text message which starts off with Hi, Ian, by now you would have received your which is an email and they go into detail. And I might use THANK YOU FUCK IS. So it's happening all over the place. And even this is a business I've used for many, many years. And I I don't have a problem with them. And I actually will continue to use them because in that particular industry, the choices aren't great. I'll continue to use them until I'm provided with sub mills. But it's like, Man, this is like it's just rampant. And I don't watch a great deal of TV. And if I do, it's on a streaming platform. So even when I'm watching sport unless there's the odd occasion where it's only available on a free to air channel that I was just watching in an area where I barely have to see ads. But on those rare occasions like the Olympics comes to mind

stead of origin rugby league in Australia, we only choices to watch one of the terrestrial channels. And it's just everywhere. It's just bombarded with it from the news updates to the commercials to their language to promote their internal stuff. And like I said, once you see it, you just can't unsee it, and it's everywhere. And there are certain decisions you're making in your life that have become so automated by this program that you don't even realize. So the first step is to have an awareness around it, have an awareness around language, whenever anyone's repeating the same thing again and again and again, then you can be sure that they're trying to get you to do something. Or language like, what's the other one? I learned this the hard way. Right now, something remember something, something something right. And I was taught the sort of sales process that I was taught. And then once I learned this, and I looked back, and the sales process had right now, about four or five times. So what that resulted in was in the early days of me coaching, I actually had people sign up who weren't right now, they weren't right for me. But because of this anchoring this language, within the process, they'd been coerced. Or unknowingly for me, and knowingly to me, they'd been coerced into do something that they weren't really ready to do and wasn't right for them. Now, once I started realizing that I was like, Oh, shit, like, this is bad, like, I'm actually part of the problem. So I made sure I remove all of that language. And I'm actually really conscious of it. If I leave it in there at different times, it's by accident, not by choice. But unconscious enough to go, Well, I'm looking out for it. And that's what I would ask you is to have that awareness, and then awareness around language, have that awareness around your own language? Are you inadvertently using similar tactics for other people? Are you inadvertently making decisions based on some language that you've heard in a repeated way from other different places as well? Like I said, it's rapid cannibal. I couldn't believe it when I get that text message. But like I said, once you see it, you can't unsee it. So that ends the rant. If you're wanting to know more about this sort of stuff, have a look at Google, neuro linguistic linguistic programming. Have a look at anchoring. Have a look at any, any searches around the manipulation with language and mind control might take you down some, some pretty ordinary rabbit holes, but there might be something there as well. But the more you can be aware of what's going on in your world, then the more you can navigate it in a way that actually works for you. I hope that helps Speak to you soon.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief. Let's chat. Email me at info at Ian Hawkins You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform