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Trust the Wisdom of Change with Sylvia Worsham author of Journey to Me
Episode 22013th October 2022 • Beyond Adversity with Dr. Brad Miller • Dr Brad Miller
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Sylvia is a Turning Point Coach and author of the book entitled “Journey To Me: Trust The Wisdom Of Change.”

She helps female entrepreneurs go from a turning point to the acceptance of new habits that result in a breakthrough.

In this episode, Sylvia shared how she nearly died which shifted her lens toward the life she lives right now.

She talks about how the fear of not being good enough and the unconscious mind might prevent you from choosing the space of happiness.

As a coach and author, she faced challenges and miracles in her life that made her surrender to God.

That made Sylvia steps into building a stronger relationship with God. 

God will always direct you toward your light and keep you on the path that was meant for you all along.

Sylvia Worsham talks to Dr. Brad about her book which is a blueprint of what's taking you from the turning point and what characterizes the turning point through your soul identity.

Beyond that, Sylvia shared some stories of whom she has helped, and turning points in their life based on her book and coaching. 

Sylvia Worsham’s story is a spiritual, powerful, and transformational testament of one who has lived out of choosing the space of happiness and emerged to enjoyment, confidence, and content life. 

Episode 220 of The Beyond Adversity Podcast is a must-listen for any spiritual-minded looking for a story of a woman who overcomes a negative mindset and replaces it with new habits that lead to breakthroughs.

“The Beyond Adversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller is published weekly with the mission of helping people “Grow Through What They Go Through” as they navigate adversity and discover their promised life of peace, prosperity, and purpose. 

https://www.sylviaworsham.com/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9cCgUH9u_9aa9ZukqiUM8Q

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sylviaworsham

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachsylviaworsham/?hl=en

Transcripts

Brad Miller::

Hello good people. Welcome again to the Beyond adversity podcast.

Brad Miller::

With Dr. Brad velour here, we are trying to help you to grow through what you go

Brad Miller::

through helping you to navigate adverse life events and to come out to a better

Brad Miller::

place, a place we like to call, a place of peace, prosperity, and purpose.

Brad Miller::

And we love to do that by talking to people who have had some challenges in their

Brad Miller::

life that they have had to overcome some adversities they've had to overcome.

Brad Miller::

And they've had some turning points. And then they are able to teach us and lead

Brad Miller::

us and guide us as to what they have learned and what they can apply to our life.

Brad Miller::

And we have a turning point to coach with us today.

Brad Miller::

So there Worsham is an author and multi-lingual speaker, and the author of

Brad Miller::

Journey To Me: Trust The Wisdom Of Change. She has an incredible story to tell

Brad Miller::

about life transformation spiritually, physically, and emotionally at many levels.

Brad Miller::

And she's got some things to teach us here today beyond diversity.

Brad Miller::

So we welcome you, Sylvia, to be on diversity. Thanks for being with us.

Sylvia Worsham::

Thank you so much, Brad. I appreciate it very, very much

Sylvia Worsham::

looking forward to this interview.

Brad Miller::

Well, it'd be great. You are a turning point, coach, it says here in the information

Brad Miller::

that we've talked about a little before we got him on the podcast here.

Brad Miller::

That means you've had a turning point or two in your life, and some pretty

Brad Miller::

dramatic situations in your life. So let's just kind of start there.

Brad Miller::

Let's kind of start with, you know, kind of where you were in your life when you

Brad Miller::

had some of those dramas happened? And your situation and I don't want to spoil

Brad Miller::

the story. So unpack the story for us a little bit.

Sylvia Worsham::

So the biggest turning point that I share in Journey to me, and shifted my lens

Sylvia Worsham::

towards the life I live now is when I nearly died in 2012 I my life at that time I was a

Sylvia Worsham::

single mom to a young son, four year old, I had been through divorce, a very

Sylvia Worsham::

painful divorce. And luckily, I had started dating again. And so my boyfriend of four

Sylvia Worsham::

months said, hey, I want your son to meet my family. So why don't we go to

Sylvia Worsham::

Louisiana? He's from Louisiana. And why don't why don't we have your son meet

Sylvia Worsham::

my family. And for a single mom, that was like a sure sign.

Sylvia Worsham::

He was considering marriage. So it was a big deal. And a couple of days before we

Sylvia Worsham::

before we left, I started feeling pain. I could not take a deep breath.

Sylvia Worsham::

And I thought well how strange is this? And I thought, well, maybe it was my stress

Sylvia Worsham::

because I had I worked 50 to 60 hour workweeks with a pharmaceutical company

Sylvia Worsham::

at the time I was one of their top multiple award winning performers.

Sylvia Worsham::

So I had big time quotas, sales quotas I had to achieve and I was always working.

Sylvia Worsham::

A perfectionism achiever a very, very high achiever. And so I thought, Well, maybe

Sylvia Worsham::

it's stress related, right? But either way, I kind of checked with my brother who's a

Sylvia Worsham::

doctor and he said, It sounds like this is a common thing. And young people It

Sylvia Worsham::

sounds like the inflammation of the lining of the lungs. So just take these medicines

Sylvia Worsham::

you should be okay, but just realize it's gonna be really painful. I take a flight, which

Sylvia Worsham::

is an A miraculous thing. I did not die after this flight. And luckily, we spend the

Sylvia Worsham::

night at our hotel in the middle of the night. I have a pain that jolts me out of bed,

Sylvia Worsham::

and it felt like 15 eyes were simultaneously being puncturing my lungs basically,

Sylvia Worsham::

every time I took a breath and so it was really scary. And the next day I we happen

Sylvia Worsham::

to walk in, I walked in unassisted to the hospital when I spoke to my brother and

Sylvia Worsham::

they did a scan of the lungs and, and I have a specialist that walks into my ER room

Sylvia Worsham::

and says, a woman in your condition should not be sitting up talking to me right

Sylvia Worsham::

now. You have two large pulmonary embolisms and your left lung and for those

Sylvia Worsham::

that don't know what a pulmonary embolism is, it's it's up.

Sylvia Worsham::

It's a highly critical situation because it's blood that is clotting that has traveled

Sylvia Worsham::

through your heart to get to your lung. And it's blocking like the main veins, right?

Sylvia Worsham::

So it could, it could lead to people having heart attacks or strokes and essentially

Sylvia Worsham::

dying. Well, I had two large ones. So they had gone through my heart

Brad Miller::

that I've dealt with. I've dealt with people who have had that before.

Brad Miller::

And I know well.

Sylvia Worsham::

You've got you got people that have one and they die from one and I had multiple,

Sylvia Worsham::

I didn't just have the two. Yeah. And the doctor said, You know what, we got to

Sylvia Worsham::

check you out further because there's another problem and we don't know what it

Sylvia Worsham::

is. So they do a second scan the next day and I've been admitted now in stable

Sylvia Worsham::

condition. And then I get six doctors in my hospital room. And I'm thinking this is

Sylvia Worsham::

not good. This is not good news.

Brad Miller::

No, no, something's up when six doctors show up and check. Yeah

Sylvia Worsham::

neither one of them wants to look you straight in the eye. That's always a clear sign

Sylvia Worsham::

Something's really wrong. And and they go on to tell me that, that they're racing

Sylvia Worsham::

against time that I have a massive blood clot in the same main vein that supplies

Sylvia Worsham::

blood to all my main organs. And it's putting pressure on my liver.

Sylvia Worsham::

And if it does lock off the blood supply, I'm gonna go into liver failure and require a

Sylvia Worsham::

transplant. So now, I'm in a highly critical situation. And in that moment, I

Sylvia Worsham::

completely surrendered to God, by the set is now in your divine hands, they had

Sylvia Worsham::

told my family, I had a 20% chance of surviving. And they were just not hopeful I

Sylvia Worsham::

was gonna survive the night. So this is like Saturday before Easter Sunday.

Sylvia Worsham::

And they start me on this therapy and it's not a therapy they're used to us doing.

Sylvia Worsham::

So that's another miracle in itself. And the next day, I have a woman with the

Sylvia Worsham::

Catholic Diocese that walks into my room and says, Do you want to pray with me?

Sylvia Worsham::

And I said, Yes, I need a prayer I need I need more than what the medical

Sylvia Worsham::

community is offering because they're not sure of what's going to happen.

Sylvia Worsham::

And we start to pray with form of prayer circle. My boyfriend was in the room.

Sylvia Worsham::

And in the middle of the Our Father, I, I feel this love that's so immense.

Sylvia Worsham::

It felt like someone was cradling me and his loving arms. And I felt the peace.

Sylvia Worsham::

I felt unknowing that I was okay. i This serenity that just filled the room and she left

Sylvia Worsham::

the room and my boyfriend turned to me. And he said you felt them too, didn't

Sylvia Worsham::

you? So he made himself known second miracle, right. And 20 minutes later, it was

Sylvia Worsham::

confirmed that, that I had no more threat the doctors were they were baffled.

Sylvia Worsham::

And the third and final miracle I received that weekend was the fact that I had no

Sylvia Worsham::

long term complications. Because usually when you have these situations, you

Sylvia Worsham::

those pulmonary embolisms leave holes in your lungs, and you will require a

Sylvia Worsham::

transplant of a long way. And that's another critical situation. So like as if nothing

Sylvia Worsham::

had ever happened to me. So there, there were three, three miracles.

Sylvia Worsham::

And so I, I use that turning point. And, I started to question why I survived? Was I

Sylvia Worsham::

living my best life? Was this my purpose? To stay at pharmaceuticals forever? Or

Sylvia Worsham::

was I meant to do something else? And that's what started that quest. Entirely.

Brad Miller::

Well, that's, that's awesome, really well, and we'll get to some of the details in just a

Brad Miller::

second here. But that's a pretty awesome story. And on Easter. Nonetheless, that's

Brad Miller::

actually cool as well. And one of the reasons I wanted to chat with you today, Sylvia

Brad Miller::

is you and I have something in common I had an Easter experience, not unlike what

Brad Miller::

you had in 1999. Without going in all the gory details. I had a massive loss of blood

Brad Miller::

from my colon. And I was on Easter Sunday, and I'm a retired pastor.

Brad Miller::

And usually Easter was kind of a busy day for us pastors. And so I was out of it.

Brad Miller::

I couldn't be in church on Easter Sunday, and I was in the hospital.

Brad Miller::

And anyhow, I had a little my own little private Easter service.

Brad Miller::

So the courtyard of the hospital, and all alone on Easter sort of being in the middle

Brad Miller::

of hullabaloo of a big Easter service. And a sense of calm come about me in a sense

Brad Miller::

of healing. And any other long story short is that I'm supposed to have major

Brad Miller::

surgery the next day to take out my colon, and instead I went home because I was

Brad Miller::

they couldn't find the source so much of my bleeding I was having and I went home.

Brad Miller::

So I can resonate with your story, a little bit there and quite a bit. And then the part

Brad Miller::

I'm interested in as well is not only these miracle stories people have like you and I

Brad Miller::

have and others. What do you do next? And I think it's so important and vital.

Brad Miller::

We want to learn from you about this. And I would just ask you this about your

Brad Miller::

experience that you said you had a turning point and you call yourself a turning

Brad Miller::

point, coach. And I'm assuming that this was your moment of turning point.

Brad Miller::

But then what did you do then to change after that? What were some of the actions

Brad Miller::

that you took after that, that led you to do what you're doing?

Brad Miller::

Now, tell me about some actions that you took,

Sylvia Worsham::

I started to take personal growth courses because I wanted to understand why I

Sylvia Worsham::

picked the life I had picked before. I wanted to get to the root of why I was

Sylvia Worsham::

operating from a fear space. Fear of failure fear of not being enough.

Sylvia Worsham::

Why was that and and I started to I trade it off my multiple word winning career and

Sylvia Worsham::

I transitioned into a different space. I became a stay at home parents because that

Sylvia Worsham::

was the next step. In my journey. I got remarried and started to have my babies

Sylvia Worsham::

and I wanted to be there for my children because i had i After the divorce, I had

Sylvia Worsham::

realized that I had not spent enough time with my kids. So I wanted to go back to

Sylvia Worsham::

the joyful space. And some of the actions I took was I started to really look at my life

Sylvia Worsham::

and search for my purpose and I still Ready to look for my answers inside of myself.

Sylvia Worsham::

Because what had happened my previous life was I was always searching for

Sylvia Worsham::

happiness outside of me. And I found that even though I got to this beautiful space,

Sylvia Worsham::

after I got divorced, I was their number one rep, and I'm standing there in front of

Sylvia Worsham::

all my peers, I thought I would have happiness, and I didn't. And when I nearly died,

Sylvia Worsham::

it kind of woke me up to, you know, when I'm stressed out, I'm not happy, I need to

Sylvia Worsham::

start making some changes to move towards that space of happiness. So how do I

Sylvia Worsham::

do that? And I started to turn inward. And the more I turned inward, the more I saw

Sylvia Worsham::

my path before me. And let me explain what I mean by that. My relationship with

Sylvia Worsham::

God strengthened after I surrendered and accepted, because those are two major

Sylvia Worsham::

steps into building a stronger relationship with God. And God will always lead you

Sylvia Worsham::

to your light, he will always lead you on the path of who and who you were meant

Sylvia Worsham::

to be in the first place. And so the more I turned inward, the more the answers

Sylvia Worsham::

came in one morning, one of the answers came to me of you need to call Bridget

Sylvia Worsham::

and Bridget was my mentor, that of a class I took one of the many classes I took in

Sylvia Worsham::

personal growth. And she was with the John Maxwell team. And so I called her and

Sylvia Worsham::

and the prompting was basically call her and sign up. You're meant to be a coach, a

Sylvia Worsham::

speaker and a trainer. And I called her and I started the certification process in

Sylvia Worsham::

2017. And I and but the more I turned inward, the more the answers came, and

Sylvia Worsham::

they came in the form of messengers people he would send to me. And the same

Sylvia Worsham::

way I found you today I, I felt the prompting to get on clubhouse. And when I got on

Sylvia Worsham::

clubhouse, one of the ladies referred me to pod match. And then that's how I found

Sylvia Worsham::

you, I if I had not listened to that prompting, if I had not acted on it, because it's

Sylvia Worsham::

always unique. There's always a timing factor. To these promptings.

Sylvia Worsham::

There's a reason why they come up when they do now, what stops us is our fear,

Sylvia Worsham::

our mind our subconscious mind, obsess.

Brad Miller::

I want to get to the fear piece in a second here in terms of what you did to navigate

Brad Miller::

your fear. But let's just be clear about you became a woman of action, you had your

Brad Miller::

turning point here. And you began to take some classes and you ended up in the

Brad Miller::

John Maxwell leadership training, which I'm familiar with. And you began to look

Brad Miller::

inward and you described a pathway a new guide suit me like a new path, it

Brad Miller::

seemed like the your corporate life, you were on the path where your affirmations

Brad Miller::

were kind of the next sales goal, or the next corporate affirmation or whatever it

Brad Miller::

was, in that regard. And that was unsatisfying, but you found your satisfaction in

Brad Miller::

your inner life, and particularly, and then you begin to look for these prompting

Brad Miller::

things, and including getting married and things of this nature, taking care of the

Brad Miller::

kids and focusing on parenting? Was it a fair assessment of some of the actions that

Brad Miller::

you took that led you in a different pathway from where you're at?

Sylvia Worsham::

Yes, it was all the actions I took. But it was mostly because

Sylvia Worsham::

I was listening to what she was saying to me.

Brad Miller::

Yeah. And go through this just for a second, the chair of the spiritual connection,

Brad Miller::

seems like that thread was going through all of this, right, from the very initial point

Brad Miller::

of your, you know, your crisis, your transformation, your Easter experience.

Brad Miller::

So this is talking about the importance for you of connecting with higher power

Brad Miller::

connecting with a spiritual life, much of where you're at before your Easter

Brad Miller::

experience, but particular afterwards, what kind of of relevance does that have to

Brad Miller::

you in terms of this total transformation that you had Tell me a little bit more

Brad Miller::

about that higher power that you had there?

Sylvia Worsham::

Before, before the turning point, I had already started having a much deeper

Sylvia Worsham::

relationship with Him. In fact, after the divorce was when, when that started to shift

Sylvia Worsham::

for me, but it really got deeper once I surrendered to Him, totally trusted him to

Sylvia Worsham::

take the reins of my life, which is a very different relationship than if you just

Sylvia Worsham::

believe in Him, because anybody can believe in him. But do you trust them?

Sylvia Worsham::

And that came after the near-death experience, because here I am in a

Sylvia Worsham::

situation where I have zero control over what's going to happen next, I am facing

Sylvia Worsham::

uncertainty at a very high level. And I've turned to him now and said, I trust that

Sylvia Worsham::

you are going to lead me to the path of greater joy, that this this situation is

Sylvia Worsham::

happening in my favor. And not to me, and that's a big difference.

Sylvia Worsham::

Before I would look at life happening to me, and the focus was completely off and

Sylvia Worsham::

And when I started to trust them, I started to see the opportunity, that change

Sylvia Worsham::

provided to me, because there's a great deal of wisdom and change.

Sylvia Worsham::

But it depends on where your mindset is, at the moment that you're going to

Sylvia Worsham::

receive it in different ways. You can say, Well, I'm a survivor, or I receive three

Sylvia Worsham::

miracles. And there's a difference in how you're saying that.

Sylvia Worsham::

And, and he was the reason for that difference.

Sylvia Worsham::

Yeah, I don't know if I answered your question, or there's more?

Brad Miller::

No, absolute no, no, no, I'm just, just kind of, well, I like to think about it terms of

Brad Miller::

how people, for people to transform, I believe you have to kind of have a physical

Brad Miller::

action that you take, you know, whatever it is, take the force, for instance, that you

Brad Miller::

have to take some action, get off your ground, whatever it is, some people just get

Brad Miller::

some, you know, they get healthier, they go running, or they have counseling, or

Brad Miller::

whatever would be getting married, sometimes just one of those, but take an

Brad Miller::

action. And then the other element of what I like to teach has to do with this, that

Brad Miller::

you have to have a connection to your inner life, that spiritually oriented death

Brad Miller::

through transformation. And that's what we're coming here because that's where

Brad Miller::

contentment comes from. And then where I want to go with you now for this is just,

Brad Miller::

that's my take on that as part of my teaching there, Sylvia, but, but we're gonna go

Brad Miller::

with you now is what do you do, then? How do you live out that life and I think it's

Brad Miller::

may go to your response to, you know, to fear that you mentioned there, your

Brad Miller::

journey to me that you talked about wisdom, you know, gaining wisdom and that

Brad Miller::

type of thing in your in your book. Let's start what I want to talk to you about is a

Brad Miller::

gift from you and some insight in what you how you live your life now. And what do

Brad Miller::

you teach people now about discipline? So about practices about habits, rituals,

Brad Miller::

anything you do now that's different from where you were before? And how that

Brad Miller::

can be transferable principles to other people?

Sylvia Worsham::

Yes, yes. And, in fact, let me just give some background into this. Because what,

Sylvia Worsham::

when you operate from a space of fear, that's where your fear based ego

Sylvia Worsham::

is blocking you. Right? A lot of people stay stuck in their circumstances because it

Sylvia Worsham::

can't see beyond, beyond their circumstances, because they're operating from

Sylvia Worsham::

beliefs that limit their amazing capacity, would change provides change provides an

Sylvia Worsham::

opportunity for you to connect to your soul identity, the person that you were

Sylvia Worsham::

created to be you were born to be initially, we were born with immense, immense

Sylvia Worsham::

genius and capacity. But when we started to encounter trauma and modeling in our

Sylvia Worsham::

lives, and people telling us, we can't do it. Now we have the other identity coming

Sylvia Worsham::

into play the fear based ego identity, and this whole identity. So how do you get out

Sylvia Worsham::

of the fear based ego, you start to interrupt those fear based thoughts before they

Sylvia Worsham::

become feelings, because once they become feelings, you start to react and you

Sylvia Worsham::

have triggers that are tied to those feelings and patterns of behavior, that you've

Sylvia Worsham::

created a habit around. So let me explain something like I had a limiting belief of

Sylvia Worsham::

I'm not enough, right. So when I became a stay at home parents, it kind of reared its

Sylvia Worsham::

ugly head with my second husband. Because when he went back to work, when we

Sylvia Worsham::

had our baby girl, it went back to the time that my father was a doctor, and he

Sylvia Worsham::

never had time for us as kids, in my mind, my emotional line associated, working

Sylvia Worsham::

too many hours is not being enough for my dad. So when I when my husband went

Sylvia Worsham::

back to work trying to make a living for his family now that is staying at home.

Sylvia Worsham::

My belief of I'm not enough reared its ugly head. And what happened was that the

Sylvia Worsham::

victim mode, a pattern of behavior, started to wreak havoc in our second marriage,

Sylvia Worsham::

I became a victim in our relationship, and I blame them for our problems.

Sylvia Worsham::

And at the root of it, is this horrible belief that has been formed for many years

Sylvia Worsham::

before, like when I was a kid, that has no basis now. When you look at it

Sylvia Worsham::

consciously, it doesn't make sense. But let's be

Brad Miller::

let's be specific. What did you do about it? Then you had this resurgence of these

Brad Miller::

old feelings from growing up and you had a prior marriage and ID I understand you

Brad Miller::

had children from your first marriage as well? Yes, I have. So you had a blended

Brad Miller::

family dynamic is what I'm getting all I get that there's complicated matters here

Brad Miller::

that come into play. And so you had this What did you do about it?

Brad Miller::

You had to do something to I started a dental issue that's come up.

Sylvia Worsham::

So I started to interrupt the thoughts when the thoughts started to show up and

Sylvia Worsham::

say he's to blame. I'm such a victim. Woe is me. One of the things I coach on now is I

Sylvia Worsham::

say interrupted, alright, interrupt that thought and you do something physical with

Sylvia Worsham::

your body, you know, it's interrupted to wake up your emotional mind, which is on

Sylvia Worsham::

automatic, right? It's automatically operating for you based on however you're

Sylvia Worsham::

feeding it, right, if you're feeding it negative behavior is going to, you know, is going

Sylvia Worsham::

to give you negative outcomes if you will. So, an example of that is, before you even

Sylvia Worsham::

start blaming anybody, it's just asking yourself, like, Where's this coming from? And

Sylvia Worsham::

start asking yourself those questions and reflecting, and I started to reflect a great

Sylvia Worsham::

deal. I did a lot of journaling because I'm a writer. So writing comes easily to me.

Sylvia Worsham::

But for some people, writing is not easy. So some people do pray, and they start

Sylvia Worsham::

asking God, why why do I react to this? Like, why does this trigger me? And a lot of

Sylvia Worsham::

the answers are inside of us. Once we asked a question, it comes to us. And once

Sylvia Worsham::

those answers came to me, then I would put some new habits in place. So instead

Sylvia Worsham::

of picking a fight with my husband, right before he traveled, which was my habit, I

Sylvia Worsham::

would go off and meditate and just kind of talk to myself. God, I talked to myself.

Brad Miller::

pattern interrupts

Sylvia Worsham::

pattern interrupts are a big technique. And at the end of my weeks, what I would

Sylvia Worsham::

solely focus on was all the positive things that had happened in our marriage.

Sylvia Worsham::

And I would let go of anything that was blocking me.

Sylvia Worsham::

And I started to do that immensely during those years and

Brad Miller::

write down any of these, these, these shifts, these gratitude type things that you

Brad Miller::

put into that your journal or anything like that.

Sylvia Worsham::

I did that, in fact, I started one of the techniques is very successful for me.

Sylvia Worsham::

And I know it is for some of my coaching clients, is I tell them, you know, those little

Sylvia Worsham::

notepads that you have laying around, do little thank you, notes for your family.

Sylvia Worsham::

Once a week, it fills your cup, because you feel good about thinking positive things,

Sylvia Worsham::

the more you think positive things around your family and your relationships, the

Sylvia Worsham::

more you start to feel and focus in on that, then you start seeing opportunities

Sylvia Worsham::

versus focusing in on the negative, right. And in turn, it makes them feel good,

Sylvia Worsham::

because I know that's something that my husband has really loved.

Sylvia Worsham::

And it is strengthened our relationship. And in fact, at some point during these

Sylvia Worsham::

years, he started to write little notes to me, and he's not a writer in the least.

Sylvia Worsham::

But because he felt like, wow, this makes me feel so good. I wonder if this would

Sylvia Worsham::

make her feel good. And it started the communication process back up again.

Brad Miller::

Contagious

Sylvia Worsham::

Yeah, positivity is contagious. And one of the techniques I when you focus, I mean,

Sylvia Worsham::

the law of focus is is such a powerful thing to think about. And I think most people

Sylvia Worsham::

can relate to this, we know that what you focus on you find a gross, it seems real,

Sylvia Worsham::

not only what you focus on, you become and for a long time, I was a really negative

Sylvia Worsham::

person, I was a victim in my own relationships. And when I started to shift that

Sylvia Worsham::

mindset over by implementing these techniques, on a daily basis, settle suddenly it

Sylvia Worsham::

started to shift everything inside of me. And I became a different person.

Brad Miller::

that's good. become a different person is really what we're talking about here, this

Brad Miller::

transformation from a pathway that's stuck, not good, destructive, inward focus to

Brad Miller::

something that's outward focus, and helpful and progressive and in a way that is

Brad Miller::

dynamic with your husband and with your kids and with your career that you've

Brad Miller::

sought out now. And it seems like the career that you've sought out now is you

Brad Miller::

have these transformations you've had you want to share it with others. And that's

Brad Miller::

why you've written the book and you have some other things that you're at your

Brad Miller::

website, selfcare warson.com. And so what are people going to? What do you have

Brad Miller::

to offer people? Why did you write this book? What? What are people going to find

Brad Miller::

in this book that it's going to be helpful to them?

Sylvia Worsham::

You're gonna find a blueprint of what's taking you from the turning point and what

Sylvia Worsham::

characterizes the turning point all the way through your soul identity.

Sylvia Worsham::

And there's five steps in that blueprint. And what I've done is I've done it from the

Sylvia Worsham::

coaching and light and I say, like Christian perspective, because there are like two

Sylvia Worsham::

or three themes running through this book. One of them is that any turning point

Sylvia Worsham::

no matter what you go through a divorce, and I went through a whole slew of them,

Sylvia Worsham::

is take that turning point and how do you shift your lens? You know, what do you

Sylvia Worsham::

need to what is your mind doing? Those minds doing your subconscious, your

Sylvia Worsham::

emotional mind, that's the one that's really in control. And what is your conscious

Sylvia Worsham::

mind doing at the time and what's happening? inwardly, in your in your world who

Sylvia Worsham::

is surrounding you, who's influencing you, it gives you that guidance. And as you go

Sylvia Worsham::

through the blueprint, it kind of gives you coaching tips and tracks of what to look

Sylvia Worsham::

for, and how to implement those goals settings, like what what do you need

Sylvia Worsham::

to do. And a lot of times what I've shared in the book is three things I've shared is to

Sylvia Worsham::

create a big, bold vision in all areas of your life, because your mind needs a GPS, it

Sylvia Worsham::

needs direction, and the only direction that you're giving it right now is your

Sylvia Worsham::

programming, whatever you've been programmed with, with your modeling,

Sylvia Worsham::

and your trauma, and your significant emotional events are really what have have

Sylvia Worsham::

shaped you throughout your life. And until you become aware of how your

Sylvia Worsham::

emotional mind is fully in control and how to work with it, the book kind of shares

Sylvia Worsham::

with you how to work with that mind, so that it works in your favor and not against

Sylvia Worsham::

you. Right, and how you aligned to what your your true soul, divine souls purpose

Sylvia Worsham::

and desires are, because we all have those pools, but we get, we get stopped by our

Sylvia Worsham::

fear, our fear of failure are perfectionist patterns of behavior. So it gives you an

Sylvia Worsham::

education of these patterns of behavior, how they can manifest in your life, and

Sylvia Worsham::

how you can interrupt them, and implement new habits that lead to break through

Sylvia Worsham::

and link to beautiful breaks.

Brad Miller::

Some great breakthroughs you've had in your life and you're sharing with others in

Brad Miller::

your, in your book journey to me trust the wisdom of change. And you call yourself

Brad Miller::

a you know, you are a turning points coach, and an author of this book.

Brad Miller::

So that means that you're out there to influence and be helpful to people.

Brad Miller::

And I am working on the assumption here, Silvia, that there's been people in your

Brad Miller::

life, whom you have helped who you have seen some changes, some turning points

Brad Miller::

in their life based on either your book or your teaching or your coaching.

Brad Miller::

So tell me about a person or a situation where you've seen, okay, there are some

Brad Miller::

changes going on here. And I've been some part of that I'm interested in kind of a

Brad Miller::

transformation story, you may not have been a part of

Sylvia Worsham::

sure I had someone I had a couple that reached out to me just recently, who had

Sylvia Worsham::

have been married for like 10 years. And they weren't, they weren't communicating

Sylvia Worsham::

very well. And they have two young children. And they had two different parenting

Sylvia Worsham::

styles. So it was causing some major friction. And in she was and still is a highly

Sylvia Worsham::

successful coach herself in the health and wellness space, and he is a medical

Sylvia Worsham::

device rep. So he's in a very stressful position and his job. And their children are

Sylvia Worsham::

fairly young. And, and they came to me because they weren't communicating very

Sylvia Worsham::

well. So when I started working with both of them separately, and then I did joint

Sylvia Worsham::

sessions with both of them. And what I found was, we got to the roots of her

Sylvia Worsham::

distress, she had a lot of overwhelm in her world. And when overwhelmed, showed

Sylvia Worsham::

up, she went into complete and total control mode. And I call that the security

Sylvia Worsham::

seeker mode. And it was causing this huge problem in their marriage because she

Sylvia Worsham::

was undermining his parental role with the children. She was always in control.

Sylvia Worsham::

And he would try to help with the children and she had a way of doing things.

Sylvia Worsham::

And so it was causing a lot of problems. So what we started to implement was

Sylvia Worsham::

brand new habits, how we identify the overwhelms kind of like a child who is about

Sylvia Worsham::

to have a temper tantrum. And you know, we've been taught as parents feed them

Sylvia Worsham::

a snack. What's the same thing with your mind? When a feeling shows up?

Sylvia Worsham::

Right, a feeling shows up, you have certain triggers that go into automatic effect,

Sylvia Worsham::

right? And to her security secret would would show up in manifest in the way of like

Sylvia Worsham::

having everybody clean up the house. Everything had to be spotless. So it was like

Sylvia Worsham::

this Ghazan thing, right? So it's like, okay, when overwhelmed shows up for her.

Sylvia Worsham::

Let's implement a brand new habit. And in his in her case, once that new habit of

Sylvia Worsham::

she would step out of the room, physically and meditate and just conduct a couple

Sylvia Worsham::

of deep breaths. And then she'd come back and instead of ordering people around,

Sylvia Worsham::

she's kind of like leaned into the change. Right. So that was a brand new habit, but

Sylvia Worsham::

it was identifying what was what feelings were showing up to it and what was at the

Sylvia Worsham::

root of it right. So that was for her. For him. He had a lack of self love. He was he

Sylvia Worsham::

had a six seater pattern of behavior that was dominating his life. He had tried like

Sylvia Worsham::

every program in the book, but he was the type of person that When, when ego

Sylvia Worsham::

showed and rears its ugly head, he'd quit, he would quit on on the program he was

Sylvia Worsham::

doing. So at the root of what was happening with him is his lack of self love, he just

Sylvia Worsham::

did not feel enough. And when his wife would undermine his authority in front of

Sylvia Worsham::

the children, it would, it would really cause up, it would actually reinforce that

Sylvia Worsham::

limiting belief in Him. So what we started to work on for him was to kind of love

Sylvia Worsham::

himself more by doing, giving himself time to exercise, and really reinforcing self

Sylvia Worsham::

love in him. And what they found at the end of 45 days was that they were happier.

Sylvia Worsham::

She was less stressed, her overwhelm was almost a non issue because she knew

Sylvia Worsham::

how to she knew how, how it manifested in her life, and how she could interrupted

Sylvia Worsham::

before it became overwhelmed. Because a lot of times what happens is, you start

Sylvia Worsham::

thinking, and it just makes the feeling worse. And if you interrupt the thought.

Brad Miller::

unhealthy, this folks, give you folks some tools and some strategies and some

Brad Miller::

processes, which is what we're all about here at beyond adversity, how do you get a

Brad Miller::

handle this a lot of people get stuck in a bad marriage, or whatever it is, or it's

Brad Miller::

spiraling out of control? And how do you deal with it, and you're given us some

Brad Miller::

great insights here. And, and I think our listeners are gonna take a lot away from

Brad Miller::

our conversation here today, Sylvia. And so how can people find out more about

Brad Miller::

you, your website, your book, your coaching, how can people find out more about

Brad Miller::

you in case they want to reach out to you.

Sylvia Worsham::

you know, what, the best way to find me is also on LinkedIn, because a LinkedIn I

Sylvia Worsham::

have all the recommendations I've ever had of people that have worked with me.

Sylvia Worsham::

So if you ever want to know what they think of me, and what I'm really good at that

Sylvia Worsham::

that would be the best place to find me. And I'm, it's an open profile, so you can

Sylvia Worsham::

connect with me, I'm a public figure under Sylvia Worsham. Some simple as that my

Sylvia Worsham::

name. And the book is available online in every format imaginable, and in any

Sylvia Worsham::

independent bookstore across the United States. And so just have to order the

Sylvia Worsham::

book journey to me trust the wisdom of change. And if people want autographed

Sylvia Worsham::

copies of the book, they can email me directly and I can leave that in the show

Sylvia Worsham::

notes. I'm sure that's going to be available.

Brad Miller::

Well, we'll make a connection to your LinkedIn page and your website and all of

Brad Miller::

these connections. At our website, Dr. Brad miller.com and fascinating conversation

Brad Miller::

today with Sylvia Worsham. She is the author of Journey To Me: Trust The Wisdom

Brad Miller::

Of Change. And she's been our guest today on the beyond the adversity podcast with

Brad Miller::

Dr. Brad Miller. Thanks for being our guest today. Sylvia.

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