{"href":"http://player.captivate.fm/services/oembed?url=http%3A%2F%2Fplayer.captivate.fm%2Fepisode%2F78ff88c9-d266-4635-b2a3-24869c643a06","version":"1.0","provider_name":"Captivate.FM","provider_url":"https://www.captivate.fm","width":600,"height":200,"type":"rich","html":"","title":"Ep.8 Beauty in Chaos, Grace in Tragedy, and the Hope the Lives in Between","description":"Life is Fragile.\u00a0\r\nToday, Match on a Fire:\u00a0 Medicine and More is going to do something a little different.\u00a0 We are going to focus on the \u201cmore.\u201d\u00a0 We are talking about Fragile:\u00a0 Beauty in Chaos, Grace in Tragedy and the Hope that Lives in Between.\r\nA mom puts her child to bed with a cold and in the morning he won\u2019t wake up.\u00a0 A man goes to work and has no idea his chainsaw blade it going to kick back through his chest.\u00a0 A simple headache slowly worsens and finally, when she finally decides to have it evaluated, the MRI looks like a dime store nickel machine filled with tumor gumballs.\u00a0 \u00a0Or, so suddenly, a pandemic takes over the world and our \u201cnormal\u201d life is not so normal.\r\nI started medical school ready to be in the thick of it.\u00a0 I was cocky, motivated and unstoppable.\u00a0 I had watched ER on TV, shadowed family friends in the hospital and read all the latest and greatest books on being a doctor.\u00a0 I thought I was going in with my eyes wide open.\r\nI had no clue.\u00a0 I thought the hard part of medicine was going to be learning all the material, programming all the facts, procedures and protocols into my neuroanatomy.\u00a0 I wish.\u00a0 No doubt that was difficult, like drinking from a fire hydrant, but it paled in comparison to the challenge of working so closely with life and death.\u00a0\r\nI was forced to hold the hand of those facing relentless disease and the limitations of my abilities as a doctor.\u00a0 This wasn\u2019t just a job.\u00a0 It really was life and death.\u00a0 Talk about wandering into the hurt cave with no flashlight, I was at a loss.\u00a0\r\nLittle did I know this was the very place I had to go to really find my true soul.\u00a0 Something started to happen to me in the depths of my own emotional torture chamber.\u00a0 I stopped focusing so much on \u201cwhy.\u201d\u00a0 Why was there so much suffering?\u00a0 Why was I so hurt and lonely?\u00a0 Why am I so worried about me, especially in the face of what I see?\u00a0 Slowly I began to see life differently.\u00a0 I began to take in, I mean really take in, the things around me that meant the most:\u00a0 my kids, my family, my friends.\u00a0 I stopped worrying about the \u201cwhy.\u201d I took the time to breath and it felt good.\r\nWe only have one life to live, but if we do it right, one life might just be enough.","thumbnail_width":300,"thumbnail_height":300,"thumbnail_url":"https://artwork.captivate.fm/86ee3de3-397e-4ace-911f-13a9bf99ff74/matchonfire.png"}