Artwork for podcast Too Old For This Sh*t
Throwback episode: Did you just gaslight me?
Bonus Episode16th December 2024 • Too Old For This Sh*t • Angie Sørensen
00:00:00 01:37:27

Share Episode

Shownotes

As we wrap up the season, I'll be taking a break from releasing new episodes in November and December, but don't worry—I’ll be sharing a few earlier episodes that left a lasting impact on me  while I record new ones for the next season!  This week’s revisit is Episode 28 from 2020 with Shannon Higgins, a guest I’ve had the pleasure of recording four episodes with. She’s someone I hold a lot of respect for, and despite the tough topic, she’s great at keeping her sense of humor throughout our conversations.

In this episode, we dive deep into the topic of gaslighting. If you've ever been labeled as “insecure,” “crazy,” or “jealous” and started questioning your own reality, or had hurtful comments brushed off as “just a joke,” this conversation is for you. Shannon, a Licensed Professional Counselor and survivor of narcissistic abuse, shares her expertise and personal experience, proving that anyone—even those trained in recognising abuse—can fall victim.

We explore what it means to be a narcissist and how gaslighting works, including real-life examples from listeners. Shannon also explains how gaslighting can happen to anyone, regardless of their background, and how toxic behavior doesn’t always mean someone is a narcissist. We talk about the complexities of gaslighting, including how even well-meaning parents can engage in it unintentionally.

Shannon sheds light on complex PTSD, the self-blame victims often experience, and how trauma bonding keeps people tied to their abusers. We also discuss the importance of recognising gaslighting without overusing the term, which can invalidate real abuse survivors.

Finally, Shannon offers insights on how to protect yourself in toxic dynamics and highlights some specialist therapies for those recovering from abusive relationships, including Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing, and EMDR.

Content note: If this episode brings up difficult emotions for you, please reach out to a local mental health professional or a trauma-trained therapist.

Thanks for tuning in, and enjoy this special throwback!

If you're curious about my membership, Podcaster’s Edge, and want to join the waitlist, head to getyourpodcastdone.com.

I'd love to hear your thoughts or questions—submit them at: www.angie-s.com/contact

Podcast host I use & recommend*: https://www.captivate.fm/signup?ref=angiesorensen



*Affiliate link alert: I get a little love (aka $) if you click and buy!

Find Shannon at  https://unlockingfortitude.com/ & on insta at shannonhigginslpc 



Shannon’s recommended reads:

  • Psychopath Free & Whole Again by Jackson MacKenzie
  • Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
  • Healing from Hidden Abuse by Shannon Thomas, LCSW
  • The Empath's Survival Guide by Judith Orloff, M.D.
  • In Sheep's Clothing by George K. Simon, Ph.D.
  • Shadow Daughter by Harriet Brown
  • Women Who Love Psychopaths by Sandra Brown, M.A.
  • The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist by Debbie Mirza
  • Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker, M.A.
  • Find more resources and support at choosecourage.org.

Chapters

Video

More from YouTube

More Episodes
bonus Throwback episode: Did you just gaslight me?
01:37:27
bonus Throwback episode: Not Born Again w. Kelly Marie Johnson
01:04:13
bonus Throwback Episode: Love All Of You(sssss) with Antares (Ep #007)
01:15:41
114. #114: Merging Passion, Purpose, and Paychecks: Aligning What You Love with What You Need. Feat Joel & Yerasimos
01:34:51
113. #113: Boundaries, Not Barriers: How to Set Them and Stick to Them. Ft Dr Abby Medcalf PHD
01:32:37
112. #112: How Ancient Archetypes can Unlock your Empowerment and Personal Growth with Ximy Gonzalez
01:29:18
111. #111: How To Spot A Good And Honest Financial Advisor? Feat. Jeremy Schneider
01:07:10
110. #110: The Ripple Effect Of Sexual Confidence: Dr Tara’s Story From Hiding To Shining.
01:19:51
109. #109 Don't Let Your Triggers Ruin Your Life: Four-Step Protocol To Heal Soul Wounds Feat. Colette Davenport
01:27:19
108. #108 Serial Killers and Psychopaths: Unveiling Cold Blooded Minds with Dr. Scott Bonn
01:50:35
107. #107: 32 Years of Injustice - John Huffington’s Journey from Wrongful Conviction to Exoneration
01:43:25
106. #106 Defence Lawyer to Serial Killer John Wayne Gacy and her fight against the Death Penalty. Introducing Karen Conti.
01:20:32
105. #105 Redefining the Oldest Profession: Madam Bella Cummins on Legalising Courtesanship
01:26:21
104. #104 Beauty from Within, a Take on Breaking Free of Societal Pressures with Ximy Gonzalez
01:47:26
103. #103 The Mysterious Bonds of the Universe with Astrophysicist Lindsay DeMarchi
01:44:44
102. #102: Enjoy Today Whilst Planning Tomorrow. The One On Budgeting Feat.Tawnya Schultz
01:19:24
101. #101: The Price Tag of AI Feat. Scott Sereboff
01:29:55
100. #100: Why Men Cry In Couples Therapy? Feat. Mac Stanley Cazeau, LMHC
01:09:59
99. #099: What If You Were Innocent? Feat Dr Louise Hewitt
01:19:48
98. #098: Should You Believe Everything You Remember? Feat. Dr Kevin Felstead
01:38:04
97. #097: From Power Struggle To Complicity In Your Couple Feat. Shawn Haywood.
01:12:41
[Revisit Ep. 086] When Self-Help Goes Horribly Wrong and How To Prevent It. Feat. Ginny and Jean Brown
01:40:20
[REVISIT Ep. 058] Love Isn’t Enough Feat. Natasha Koo & Jachym Jerie
01:21:54
96. #096: Boring Money Is Big Money. How To Invest For A Better Future Feat. Jeremy Schneider.
01:24:11
95. #095: How To Not Get Divorced Feat. Pete Wright & Seth Nelson
01:23:23
94. #094: Where Do Black Holes Lead To? Feat. Lindsay DeMarchi - recorded 9th July 2022
01:08:11
93. #093: Going to Mars & the Elon Musk Paradox Feat. Lindsay DeMarchi - recorded 9th July 2022
01:08:45
92. #092: How to stop being codependent? Feat. Mary Joye
01:36:00
91. #091: Are We Even Friends? Feat Dr Marisa Franco
01:11:46
90. #090: Coming Out As Yourself. Build Resilience After Going Viral And Cancel Culture. Feat. Will Wood. Recorded June 2022 ⁣
01:32:33
89. #089: Where Do Humans Come From? Feat. Eske Willerslev
01:39:57
88. #088: Making Peace. Lessons From Prisons Feat. Doug Noll
01:22:44
87. #087: Stop Keeping Score With Your Partner. Feat. Dr Abby Medcalf PHD
01:29:54
86. #086: When Self-Help Goes Horribly Wrong and How To Prevent It. Feat. Ginny and Jean Brown
01:39:26
85. #085: The One With How Maria Brito Views Entrepreneurship
00:53:59
84. #084: If Sex Doesn’t Feel Like A Vacation, I Don’t Want It. Feat. Dr Tara Suwinyattichaiporn
01:19:21
83. #083: Bad Bosses vs Bad Behaviour: Is Work Ruining Your Life? Feat. Jay Guilford
01:23:05
82. #082: Drink Less, Live Better Feat. Sarah Williamson
01:07:33
81. #081: How To Win At Online Dating Feat. James Preece
01:12:10
80. #080: (Bonus) Make Your Podcasting Life Easier With These 6 Automations
00:13:49
79. #079: Four Common Mistakes Podcasters Make With Their Guests
00:18:19
78. #078: Chasing Bad Boys When We Really Crave A Wild Man Feat. Isabella Beham
01:04:31
77. #077: Coming Out After Living A Double Life Feat. Marci Warhaft
01:11:43
76. #076: Love Lessons From The Non-Cynical Divorce Lawyer. Feat. Leslie Montanile
01:35:57
75. #075: Finding Love After A Toxic Relationship Feat. Shannon Higgins M.A., LPC-S
01:37:39
73. #074: Have We Met? Love Through The Eyes Of Philosopher And Coach Sam Kukathas
01:33:59
73. #073: Flying Saucer with Frederik Dirks Gottlieb
01:24:39
72. #072: Are Compromises Ruining Your Relationships? With Jáchym Jeerie
00:55:45
71. #071: A Dominant’s Perspective On Love & What It Takes To Be A Man. The One With Sir InQ
01:14:43
70. #070: Dating at Work After #MeToo - Can You Date Your Co-Workers? With Bobbi Bidochka
01:06:00
69. #069: After The Affair - with CJ Grace
01:15:50
68. #068: I Am You And You Are Me - with Goddess Carroll
01:27:03
67. #067: Somebody Hold Me - with Epiphany Jordan
01:10:23
66. #066: How To Be Safe And Feminine When Dating - with Jerry Souter
01:27:30
65. #065: The Cost Of Love - with Haley McGee
01:03:02
64. #064: Crossdressing Is An Art Form, Not An Identity - with Savannah Hauk
01:18:35
63. #063: The Gifts & Glitches Of Highly Sensitive People. Part 2 with Jenn Turnham
01:34:11
62. #062: The Gifts & Glitches Of Highly Sensitive People. Part 1 with Jenn Turnham
00:53:50
61. #061: You Don’t Need Their Approval - with Amanda Filippelli
01:12:02
60. #060: You, Me: No Labels - with Mike Iamele
01:18:17
59. #059: Toxic Friend, Am I Enabling You? With Melanie Moberg
01:05:36
58. #058: Love Isn’t Enough - with Natasha Koo & Jachym Jerie
01:21:51
57. #057: I’m Proud of You - with Shamiso Mushambi
01:37:15
56. #056: Pleasure & Orgasms Are An Inside Job. An interview with Alex Mill
01:28:37
55. #055: Where’s Your TED Talk? With Brenden Kumarasamy
00:50:09
54. #054: Mental Health Is Not Shameful - with Jordan from Listen, Lucy
01:14:18
53. #053: Sexually Matched - with Asa Baav from Tailormatched.
01:27:36
52. #052: Yesterday’s Trolls & The Spoiled Society - with Dr Robin Hornstein PhD
01:35:18
51. #051: Why Incompatibility Is What You Need In A Partner - with Dr Kalanit Ben-Ari PhD
01:18:47
50. #050: Back For Season Two!
00:36:46
49. #049: Money Talks In Sex & Love - with Dr. Kathrine Bejanyan PhD
00:56:53
48. #048: Sneak Peek Behind The Making Of Too Old For This Sh*T
00:28:55
47. #047: Where Is Home And Where Do We Belong? With Safiya Robinson
01:31:31
46. #046: My Past Has Nothing To Do With You - with Tiffani Cappello CHt, RTT, NLP, CLC
01:41:28
45. #045: Four Steps To Overcoming Stress
00:21:10
44. #044: Breaking Free From A Cult - with Tiffani Cappello CHt, RTT, NLP, CLC
01:57:35
43. #043: To The Love Gurus That Ruined Our Love Life - with Jerry Souter
01:19:45
42. #042: Love is Blind: We’re All Crazy. Part 2 with Priska & Bas (The Love Alchemists)
01:23:28
41. #041: Love Is Blind: Men Feel & Women Think. Part 1 with Priska & Bas (The Love Alchemists)
02:01:23
40. #040: The Feminist Trap & Sexual Desires - with Maria Merloni LICSW, CLC
01:08:31
39. #039: What’s Your Thing? With Bridget Chambers
01:16:31
38. #038: How To Trust Again After Sleeping With The Enemy - with Shannon Higgins, M.A., LPC-S
01:34:20
37. #037: What Makes A Narcissist & How To Leave One? With Shannon Higgins, M.A., LPC-S
01:31:44
36. #036: Am I Giving You The Wrong Signals? With Dr Chelsea Page DHS, LPC, MS
01:17:23
35. #035: Love In Isolation - with Certified Sexuality Educator Courtney Boyer.
01:20:28
34. #034: Chat With A Former Call Girl: Soul Wound, Sex & Getting Off For Empaths, with Colette Davenport.
01:11:52
33. #033: Food, Hope And Sanity In The Times Of Isolation - with Sarah Dosanjh MSc CTA MBACP
01:20:22
32. #032: Be There For Me, Just Not Like That - with Marianne van den Broek
01:15:04
31. #031: 12 Steps On How To Stay Calm And Healthy During COVID-19
00:25:11
30. #030: How to Create Sense of Belonging & Home - with Nic Scholtysik
01:14:41
29. #029: Carnivore vs Vegan: the Pushers, Genetics, and our Sanity
00:22:12
28. #028: Did You Just Gaslight Me? With Shannon Higgins, M.A., LPC-S
01:38:04
27. #027: Is it a Panic Attack or Chest Pains? with Jordan {Listen,Lucy.}
01:20:20
26. #026: Plans Don’t Always Turn Out - with Melanie Frome
01:09:13
25. #025: Oops, I Forgot To Have Kids…Or Did I? With Clarissa Castillo-Ramsey
01:07:04
24. #024: Teach Me about Pleasure - with Dr. Uchenna “UC” Ossai
00:43:57
23. #023: Cindy Gallop: Redefining Sex, Consent, and Empowerment
00:52:24
22. #022: Dating For Women: Safely And On Our Terms.
00:31:51
21. #021: How To Date Women.
00:31:16
20. #020: 101 To Manifesting In 2020 - with Lynn Nicholls
01:08:14
19. #019: Surviving Xmas - with Lynn Nicholls
00:45:01
18. #018: Inside The Mind Of A Professional Dominatrix - with Mistress Marley
01:01:46
17. #017: Let’s Talk About Tantric Sex - with Paal C. Bundz aka The Wildman
01:07:05
16. #016: What’s Wrong Down There? With Dr. Susie Gronski DPT, PRPC, WCS
01:17:58
15. #015: Removed episode [Don’t Tell Me Who To Be]
00:01:20
14. #014: How To Heal And Grow When Dating - with Dr Kathrine Bejanyan
01:37:21
13. #013: Let Them Talk - with Lane Wonder
01:02:47
12. #012: Be Psychic, Not A Psycho, In Love - with Lynn Nicholls
01:22:06
11. #011: You're Not Alone In Being Alone
00:14:47
10. #010: Not Born Again - with Kelly Marie Johnson
01:03:10
9. #009: Don't Be Awkward, Be The Misfit - with Rachael Kay Albers
00:58:22
8. #008: Is It An Eating Disorder Or A Diet? With Sarah Dosanjh MSc CTA MBACP
01:01:17
Bonus Trailer For The Pilot Season
00:02:10
7. #007: Love All Of You(sssss) - with Antares who's living with D.I.D. aka Multiple Personality Disorder
01:15:29
6. #006: Love Lessons From A Lapdancer - with June Morrow
01:37:50
5. #005: Lessons Learned In Celibacy - with Safiya Robinson
01:03:18
4. #004: It's Not Me, It's You - with Clarissa Castillo-Ramsey
01:12:49
3. #003: Bounce Back - with Melanie Frome
01:03:52
2. #002: Be Bold. Pivot - with Paula Mould
01:02:47
1. #001: Turned On - with Rachel Paz
01:13:05
Trailer For The Pilot Season
00:02:33